High Maintenance (2016) s02e09 Episode Script

1 HANNAH (OVER PODCAST): This is Invisibilia, I'm Hannah Rosen.
ALIX: And I'm Alix Spiegel.
HANNAH: Invisibilia is a show about all the invisible forces that shape human behavior.
And today, as part of our concept album, we're talking about reality bubbles.
Most of us live in one.
It's our little corner of the world filled with the ideas and the people that we believe in, and that we like best.
ALIX: And until recently, how completely we lived in these reality bubbles and the concepts that both created and sustained them wasn't entirely clear to us.
But then came the election, and our bubbles suddenly felt like a problem.
A lot of people were suddenly aware that they weren't ever even exposed to concepts or ideas that were clearly influencing other people.
HANNAH: So, we offer you now a practical guide to bubble hopping.
More in a minute.
MAN: Jasper! (CAFE MUSIC PLAYING) Atomic bomb Oh my God, I love this song.
I love this song, too.
Spotify, baby! It's changed everything.
Spotify is literally salvation.
Excuse me.
Can you watch my stuff? (PHONE CHIMES) (CAMERA PHONE CLICKS) (TAPPING) (RAPID BEEPING) - WOMAN: No, I was in Portugal.
- MAN: Really? - WOMAN: Yeah, I was in Lisbon.
- JASPER: Fuck.
Hey y'all, so I think the Internet went out.
I'm gonna work on that for a bit, until then, maybe use pen and paper or something.
THE GUY: Okay, what do I got? (INHALING) Okay, how 'bout this? "Have your jackalope call my jackalope.
" Have your jackalope call my jackalope.
And now try that in an Australian accent.
(AUSTRALIAN ACCENT): Have your jackalope call my jackalope.
"Good night, my meatballs.
" Good night, my meatballs.
"Pop up on your mom!" Pop up on your mom.
- "Once a waterbed, always a waterbed.
" - Once a waterbed, always a waterbed.
- "Gimme back that skort!" - Gimme back that skort! - "Come on down to Clown Town.
" - Come on down to Clown Town! - "Who threw the ham at me?" - Who threw the ham at me? - "Can I borrow that merkin?" - Can I borrow your merkin? - "Have mercy.
" - Have mercy! You're really good at this.
- (PHONE DINGS) - Thanks, man.
I could do this all night.
You want you want to give this a shot? - I got time for one round.
- Come on! - You good with those two? - Perfect.
Thank you.
Yeah, man.
That's a hundred.
Atomic bomb Oh, the flip phone! That's why your fucking text was so weird.
I thought you were stroking out, man.
- That was such a weird text.
- (LAUGHS) Sorry about that.
I'm just, uh trying to stay off the Internet as much as I can.
Oh, yeah? What prompted that? I don't know.
I just started to feel like everything in my life was curated by an algorithm, you know? So how's it working for you? It's my first attempt, you know.
I'm just trying to stay off social media.
But I'm tethered to a laptop in a cafe with Wi-Fi all day for work.
It's like I I can't stay off my sites.
I am totally addicted.
Yeah, I get that.
But, you know, you can't just go fucking cold turkey with a flip phone, you know? You probably gotta, like, step into it.
You know what you could do? I have these other clients who do a totally tech-free evening one night a week.
No tech, no electricity.
They just, like, light candles and play board games, and sing magical songs, or fucking I don't know what they do.
They're pretty charming, though.
- You should try it out.
- That's a good idea.
(INHALES) What the fuck is this? Oh, it's a vape, dude.
Yeah, you should definitely go tech-free.
(LAUGHING) Uh, can I use your bathroom? Yeah, sure, it's over there.
(WHISPERS) But can I use your bathroom? Yeah, just turn the fan on afterwards.
Cool.
I'm gonna light it up.
(SIREN WHOOPS OUTSIDE) (LIGHTER FLICKS) MAN: The blatant denial of things that none of us really want to face in getting real.
We've arrived at Act Two of our program.
Act Two.
The lie becomes (BLOWS) (CANDLE CLATTERS) Atomic bomb CHEF: Lastly, the ricotta is accompanied by roasted beets, nettle pesto, crushed pistachios, and focaccia.
And that's $16.
00.
Any questions? (MURMURING) All right.
Um, while I have you, my show is on Friday, at 9:00, at Star Bar.
- Are you gonna show the "Top Hat" video? - Oh, I love that one! I don't know, actually, but it's, um, it's gonna be really funny.
Yeah, I'll be there.
- RAINA: Thank you.
- WOMAN: Me too! - Cool, I'm coming too, and I'm bringing B9.
- (PHONE CHIMES) (WOMEN CHEERING) (SIGHS) - (PHONE CHIMES) - RAINA: This is insanity.
- (INHALES) - Didn't you block them? Yeah, I blocked them.
It doesn't matter.
I get flooded with texts, constantly.
- These are so gross.
- Yeah.
You should, like, go off Twitter for a week.
(SIGHS) (PHONE CHIMES) (DRILL WHIRRING) (DISTANT SIREN WAILING) Okay, if you need me, scream.
Okay? (PHONE VIBRATING) Wow.
Still texting? I think you need to call the police.
- (DOOR CHIMES) - (GASPS) Hi, we're closed.
- Right on.
- Bye.
(SIGHS) (LOCK CLACKS) Okay.
- (HORN HONKS) - Jesus! (HORN HONKING) SOLOMON: You're not gonna feel it right away.
You know, don't read it.
The thing is, it's a little bit over a long period of time.
So it's like microdosing? - Yeah.
- I heard of that! - Okay.
- Yeah, I know some people who microdose.
- Acid, but yeah.
- Yeah? - Not gold.
- It's it's a form of gold.
It kind of looks like Molly.
Well, I assure you, it's not.
And the positive effects last much longer.
Oh! - Oh, thank you.
What's this? - Boing.
Deejaying a wicked gig tonight.
So, if you wanna come 'round, I'll put you on the list.
That's very nice of you.
- And thank you for the gold.
- (PHONE CHIMING) Of course.
Hold on, let me take this.
- Yeah.
- Hey! What's going on, Raina? RAINA (ON PHONE): Nothing, I'm sorry to call you.
I know that you prefer texts.
THE GUY (ON PHONE): No, it's fine.
- You home? - I am! Cool.
Be like an hour or so? Okay, thank you.
That's perfect.
Cool.
I love you.
Oh.
(LAUGHS) - Um, thank you.
- Bye.
Damn it.
DARIA: Do you want me to BCC Bebe and Cece Winans? JO: Of course! But then BCC Bebe Neuwirth.
- But Cece Peniston told me to CC Bebe - (PHONE CHIMES) not BCC Bebe, 'cause she cannot be trusted.
- Okay, that could work.
- JO: Okay.
- - JO: Have you guys seen my blue wig? Oh, Kayla has your blue wig.
You lent it to her at Ars Nova.
JO: Oh, fuck, you're right.
- (KNOCKING AT DOOR) - DARIA: You're not gonna get it back.
Oh (WHISPERS) Who is that? - Is it your neighbor? - JO: I'll get it.
- THE GUY: Hey! - Oh, hey.
(WHISPERS) Weed.
- JO: Come in.
- THE GUY: How are ya? - Hi! - DARIA: Hi! I'm so sorry about that "I love you" moment on the phone.
- It was so weird.
- RAINA: Oh! Don't worry about it.
I had a hard week, so it was actually sort of nice to have some positive energy.
I said "I love you" to my therapist.
That happens.
Um, wait.
How did you get in the building, though? Uh, the neighbor downstairs let me in.
Oh, yeah.
Stuff like that happens all the time, you know? People just slip in behind someone, and then the worst happens.
Yeah.
Looks like you guys are doing something - something.
- We got a show.
- THE GUY: Oh, yeah? - DARIA: Yeah.
You want to come? Lots of invitations today.
Oh, wow.
I didn't know you all performed together.
I'm actually gonna sit this one out.
I don't feel up to it, so Yeah, I don't really feel like going there, and being like, "You ever been on Tinder?" - You know, it just, like, isn't real.
- Raina, come on.
You know how much I promoted this on social media.
- I do know, but - I got blocked by my mom.
Well, I'm not surprised, but I can't do it.
- So, I don't want to.
- JO: I'll stay with you.
- And stand by you.
- What?! - Jo! - I know the plan.
- You're gonna go.
I'm gonna stay.
- I don't know if I'm gonna go.
- I'm not committing.
- RAINA: It's fine.
I'm just gonna sit back, and if you call, and I don't answer, just know that I went painfully.
It was hard.
It was a tough death.
JO: Not funny.
- All right.
This is what they want.
They want you to be scared in your home.
- THE GUY: "They"? - DARIA: You have to come.
THE GUY: I don't want to interrupt, but is anyone gonna actually buy weed? (BEEPING) (CLEARS THROAT) Hey, everyone.
It's Raina Noriega.
Your girl made a mistake.
(WHISPERS) Fuck.
(BEEPS) Hey, Internet, it's Raina Noriega.
You might not know me.
I'm not shocked if you don't.
Small career.
I made a huge mistake earlier.
(BEEPS) Hi, this is Raina Noriega.
I wanted to apologize.
I'm very sorry for a tweet that I had sent earlier.
Um, I want to apologize to my family, and my friends who've been affected, and to everyone that I hurt, 'cause I'm realizing now I hurt a lot of people, and that was never my intention.
You know, I have less than 20,000 followers.
I didn't think it would get around.
I should not have joked about murdering the president and his family.
And made yourself a beating heart JENNA: What made you want to break the world record for longest individual dance marathon? GLORIA: Okay, so I'm not actually trying to break the record.
In fact, when the time runs out, I'm stopping it right there.
Because I want to share this with Kala, you know, she's the one who already broke the record, I actually want to share the glory with her.
So, she inspired you? Kind of.
I was I was dancing one night, and I thought No, no, no, I didn't actually think at all.
I felt, "This is fucking freedom.
" And how fucking awesome is the human body? I mean, we actually have no idea what it can do.
So I figured, why not see how long I can go? - Yeah.
- Why do we do anything, you know? The woman who currently holds the record was hospitalized on her first attempt.
- Are you not worried? - Oh, yeah, she got all dehydrated.
So, I'm way ahead of that.
I've got shit-tons of coconut water from CostCo.
- Okay.
- I, uh, I have Michael, my doctor friend somewhere around here.
He's attending to my needs.
And, uh, actually I'm a fucking animal.
So, uh, you can actually put that in your article.
Oh, Jimmy! - Looking pretty good out here, Morning Glory! - Hi! Hi! God! This is amazing! God! When'd you What's all this? Well, I had to make sure you were set up.
I won't be able to stay for the whole deal, right? My God, you are a sweetheart.
So sweet.
Wait! Who's on the music, guys? - CROWD: Nine, eight - MAN: Here we go, here we go! seven, six, five, four, three, two, one! - (MUSIC STARTS) - (CROWD CHEERS) Everybody Move your feet and feel united Oh Everybody Move your feet and feel united Oh We're goin' downtown (LIVELY CHATTERING) It's 3:00 a.
m.
There's love in the stars Am I dead CUPCAKE: You're dancing while you're peeing.
You're peeing while you're dancing, and I'm filming.
We're gonna get you doing everything.
Yes! Yes! (CHEERING) (LAUGHING) Baby.
Baby! Beets, celery, cucumber and chia seeds.
- Oh! - Trade, trade.
You're an angel.
You're doing so good.
So good.
Keep it going.
MAIA: Gloria! No, Maia.
I love you crazy pants, but you gotta take it inside now.
- Okay? - Okay, night-night! - MAIA: Night-night.
- GLORIA: All right, kids! I'm gonna take it inside, bind it up in the walls, make a train.
Coming right behind you.
- Don't stop moving.
- (PEOPLE WHOOPING) (MUFFLED MUSIC PLAYING) (MUSIC CONTINUING) Wake up, wake up, wake up! Wake up or go home! What's up? Do we need reinforcements? Oh my God! Wake up, wake up, wake up! We're up, we're up! Good, I've got more to do.
Wake up! I've got weed and people, come on! (MUMBLING) Jim! Jim! I want you to drink this and dance with me.
- You got to dance with me.
Just try it.
- What is it? - Can't you just do a little bit? - I'm gonna get up, I'm gonna get up.
Just a little bit.
Come on.
Dance, dance, dance, dance.
- Oh, I know, but I gotta go.
- Wish you didn't have to.
Here's the thing, Gloria.
Gloria, you have got this.
You you're almost there.
- You're on your way.
- Mm-hmm.
And I'm gonna be there with you in spirit, just are you gonna be okay? Can you hold on to this wall? The wall? - Good.
You got it? - Yeah.
- I love you.
- You got it? There it is.
Okay, I'll I'll see you.
I love you, sweetheart.
- Bye.
Bye.
Yeah? - Jim? - Bye.
- Bye, honey.
Bye.
Call me.
(MUSIC PLAYING) CUPCAKE: Guys, I never thought I would say this, but I, like, can't do this.
I, like, cannot dance anymore.
I feel bad leaving her.
Vax just got here though.
- Michael's there and he's a doctor.
- She's gonna be fine.
These are gonna help you with your ankle swelling.
Yeah, yeah.
Don't stop.
MAIA: Glowworm! You're looking jacked-up, girl.
I am almost halfway there, Maia.
You look all the way done.
(GLORIA MUMBLES) - I got a lot more in me.
- MAIA: Mm-hmm.
(DOG BARKS) - (MUSIC PLAYING) - (CLATTERING) - GLORIA: Oof! - MICHAEL: All right? - Don't ask me.
- You're dancing, dancing.
Here we go.
Here you go.
All right, you want some food? Huh? - Can I get you some food? - Cramps.
- Huh? - My right hip.
- Yeah.
How's that ankle, huh? - Little swollen.
- Maybe you can put a little strap some ice on that? - (PHONE CHIMES) - Yeah? - Uh-huh.
You dancing? - Yeah, that's nice.
- Oh.
(CLEARS THROAT) This is Dr.
Price.
- Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
- (SNAPPING FINGERS) Suture? All right, I'm on my way.
I'll be right there, I know where that is.
Okay, okay.
- Mmm? - Okay, Gloria.
Hey, hey! Hey, yeah! You got this.
All right, I gotta go.
- Okay? I gotta go.
Okay? - (WHIMPERS) - (MOANS) - You got this, you got this.
We eat caviar and drink champagne Champagne in the VIP area We talk about Frank Sinatra You know Frank Sinatra He's dead Dead, ha-ha-ha-ha To be famous is so nice Suck my dick, kiss my ass (MOANS) (MUSIC CONTINUES) Come on.
Still dancing.
(MUSIC CONTINUING) MAN: Lower East Side area.
It's supposed to be - Hey! - WOMAN: It's that new vegan Portuguese place.
MAN: There you go! Hey, hey, sexy motherfucker.
Hey! Wanna dance, sweetie? I got music.
(MUSIC CONTINUING) I remember When Hell was really some kinda swinging place (WHISPERS) Come.
Maia, come dance with me! Maia! (GUTTURAL) The horror.
The horror.
Dance around the horror.
(MUMBLES) (GLASS CLINKS) GLORIA: I told them all, forget it.
They're like, uh, independent now.
Hmm.
Fucking you.
I'm not doing that.
Mm-mm.
(MOANS) I know you want me.
I'm supposed to hydrate.
(BELCHES) (LAUGHS) Fucking Dr.
Michael.
Fuck you, Dr.
Michael! Said you're gonna stay the whole time! Jimmy.
Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy! Jimmy.
Some of that.
Yeah, Jimmy.
You don't like it rough.
That's okay.
Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy You're a good man (TAMBOURINE RATTLES) (CHANTING) I like to stay up all night (VOCALIZING) Oh! (BABBLES, COOS) Come on, baby.
Well it's just you and me Colin Farrell.
(WHISPERS) Just you and me.
And here is my room Here is my room Take me to bed You're a pussy whisperer A pussy whisperer A pussy whisperer A pussy whisper A pussy, a pussy A pussy whisperer - (STOVE TOP LIGHTER CLICKING) - (SIGHS) Yeah, baby.
Hot, hot.
(BABBLES) Palo Santo.
(SNIFFS) I hate fucking Palo Santo! Fuck you, Palo Santo! (LITTLE GIRL VOICE) I can make ayahuasca with a carrot.
Mmm.
Break it down.
(CARROT BANGING) JIM (ON PHONE): I know this means everything to you, honey.
And, you know, you're hurting yourself.
- You don't have to do this.
- No.
- No words.
- Come on.
Jesus Christ! This is - Dance.
- You got to stop.
- (GROWLS) - Jesus Christ.
- (GROWLS) - This is getting out of control.
JIM: Hey, hey! Gloria, pick me up! Honey I'm willing to do anything for you.
I will do anything to help you - (LIQUID TRICKLING) Come on, talk to me! Pick me up! Would ya? I'm right here.
Come on.
Yeah, this subway tile's really nice, man.
You guys did such a good job.
DAN: Thank you! It's coming along.
And you're going to Iceland next week, man? I've always wanted to go to Iceland.
- Yeah! - When are you leaving? Next Wednesday.
I'm fucking excited! - Oh, I bet.
- It's honestly the most beautiful place on Earth.
Yeah, what are you gonna do when you get there? Oh, well, I got the whole thing planned out.
We're going to Reykjavík, and we're gonna land there first.
- Uh-huh.
- I got one of those Mercedes Sprinter RVs.
And we're gonna camp all the way around the countryside.
- Oh.
- Just camping out.
- On that Ring Road? - Exactly! - That is - We're bringing our bikes.
It's gonna be sick! - Hello, hello! Oh, hey, man! - Hey! - What's up? - Oh, not much.
You know, a slave to the job.
Oh, I get it.
It's what vacations are for, right? I know, and you're going to Iceland.
- Say hi - (SCREAMS) Iceland?! - Oh, I fucking knew it! - (PHONE CHIMING) - Iceland! - Damn, you motherfucker, done ruined the surprise! I knew it! Dude, it was my second guess! - Motherfucker! Just - (SQUEALS) Hey Jim, what's up, man? JIM (ON PHONE): Hey, you around? My lady friend needs some help.
Yeah, happy to help.
- (KISS) - (PLAYFUL GROWLING) (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) Hello? Hello? Hello? Oh, hey, Gloria! - (MOANS) - I'm friends with Jim.
- (WHISPERS) Jimmy.
- Yeah, Jimmy.
How are ya? Oh, Jesus.
You okay? - I'm dancing.
- Yeah, he said you're doing a dance marathon.
Oh, hi.
Oh, wow.
You're gonna dance for a whole nother day? Well, that's what they say.
Well, Jim asked me to get you a little something.
- No, Jimmy - To help you out here.
Maybe this'll help.
- Do you want me to light it for you? - Oh.
Sucio.
- Sucio? - Mmm.
I'll dance with you.
You're sweet.
- Here you go.
- Everybody left.
- Everyone left? - Mmm.
Yeah, I imagine it's probably pretty hard to do this without people here.
It's not child's play.
No.
Pretty good, huh? This is Amnesia Haze.
Oh! You know, it's like, uh Mm, I'm not afraid of death, you know? (CHUCKLES) What? Never have been.
(LAUGHING) Mm-mm.
Oh.
Still dancing.
- Mm-hmm.
- Still dancing.
Before you came, I was really thirsty.
And I was thinking about the caves of Lascaux.
- Lascaux? - You know 'em? In France, where the Neanderthals and Homo sapiens gathered together at the same time, there was overlapping.
And the ones who made the art won.
That's what they saw in the layers of the caves at Lat No, Germany, not Lascaux.
And they sang.
(SCREAMING) No!