Legacies (2018) s02e09 Episode Script
I Couldn't Have Done This Without You
1 - Previously on Legacies - LANDON: I learned today that no matter how hard we try, we can't solve the monster problem.
So I have to leave Mystic Falls knowing that they'll follow me.
Every monster that comes out of that portal wants him for Malivore.
I am not here for Landon Kirby.
You serve a new master.
(LAUGHING) ALARIC: And who the hell are you? NECROMANCER: Bringer of life and death.
The cursed king of the underworld.
The Necromancer! - (RUMBLING) - Oh, the knife is destroyed.
One lock is released.
And with it so am I.
(GRUNTS) (GRUNTS) Hey.
You can't sleep here.
I wasn't sleeping, you thundering dolt! I was magically transported here to this What is this place? It's a strip mall.
And you're gonna have to magically transport somewhere else, 'cause it's also private property.
Worm! Do you have any idea to whom you speak? I am the Necro Oh! Oh! (BREATHING SHAKILY) What did Malivore do to me? No idea.
But if you don't leave here, - I'm-a have to call the cops.
- Silence! My powers.
He took them.
Oh, but we had a deal! He promised me! - Okay, cops it is.
- (PHONE DIALING) Wait.
Tell me.
Am I in peace? Buddy, you're in Texas.
(SIGHS) - HOPE: Starting over.
- In theory, it's simple.
You put the past behind you, take what you learned and begin again.
But it's not as easy as it sounds.
Moving on means letting things go.
Things that are familiar, easy, safe.
Things that matter.
Someone once said you can't go home again.
I hope like hell they were wrong.
Oh.
It's just you.
Alyssa, what's all this? I moved in while you were forgotten or whatever.
Your side's over there.
I usually have a single.
Which is what I had until this exact moment.
I go to bed at 10:00, so no late-night visitors.
And I don't want ants, so no eating in the room.
- Later, roomie.
- (COUGHS) (SIGHS) (SCOFFS) (SIGHS) You're late for class.
- Or are you lost? - Uh, both.
Apparently, everything changed when I was gone.
- Where's spell lab? - No idea.
I'm a little out of the loop myself.
(CHUCKLES) I just like to stride confidently and, uh, nod in hopes that people don't figure that out.
But speaking of being out of the loop, Lizzie and Josie are avoiding me.
- Why? What's up? - (CHUCKLES): I wouldn't know.
Things are still awkward between me and Josie.
I mean, I thought they were okay.
It's just bad again.
Yeah, well, knowing you and Landon are together and seeing it are two very different things.
I just wish there was something I could do.
You just have to give her some time, you know? Things will go back to normal soon enough.
I hope.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah.
- Spell lab.
- Oh! - Ric.
- Mm.
- So, I touched base with Caroline.
- Mm.
She wants us to track down the real Vardemus - and make sure he's okay.
- (EXHALES) I'm more concerned about the fake Vardemus enrolling a 500-year-old vampire in my absence.
Technically, Sebastian was in a coffin for 483 of them, but yeah.
Yeah, but we have our recruitment bylaws.
Which Vardemus revised.
Not to mention a lengthy admission process.
Which he waived.
Do you know that he got rid of the espresso machine? He was more of a tea person.
Look, I need to know more about this Sebastian.
We can't blindly let him in here without knowing more about his history.
You're right.
I'll have my intern do a deep dive into the historical records to see if there's any trace of him.
You have an intern? Dad.
Hi.
Liz-bear.
- You're late for class.
- Oh.
Um, I I got distracted, and I lost track of time.
But it was it was dumb and irresponsible, and it will never happen again.
If you're happy and you know it - Clap your hands - If you're happy and you know it Clap your hands If you're happy and you know it Then your face will surely show it If you're happy and you know it - Clap your hands.
- (EMPLOYEES CLAP) (SIGHS) Hear me, insect.
This is the master of death calling to you.
Rise.
MAN: Uh Ted? Got a sec? You know, it's crazy hat day, and you're not wearing a crazy hat.
How could I make such a mistake? Look.
(CLEARS THROAT) I don't think of myself as your boss.
I think of myself as your friend.
And bottom line is I need my friends to be on time, participate in spirit days and, most of all, sing when someone puts money in the jar.
Think you can do that? Sure.
Gary.
(CLICKS TONGUE) (HITS COUNTER) Don't let him get to you, man.
No one gets to me.
I just get so mad, you know? One time he pissed me off, I toasted his phone with the waffle cones.
That was you? That masterstroke provided me the only smile I've had this month.
- Sick.
- (EXHALES) Chad.
I'm the Ted.
I'm Ted.
(CLEARS THROAT) Hey, Jo.
Uh, what's up? Hey.
I got you some brownies.
Um, I have to run, though.
I love you.
(CHUCKLES) Love you, too.
(CLEARS THROAT) Sebastian.
Sit.
(SIGHS) Sebastian, our school was founded to keep young supernaturals safe from the world.
Well, my impression is that it exists to keep the world safe from us.
It's a balance.
Look, I'm not convinced you belong here.
We don't admit vampires over the age of 17.
But (SIGHS) Since you've been stuck in that coffin, I might make an exception if you pass our tests.
So today you will spend time with the various factions.
The goal is to see if you can control your basic urges.
You know who would be an ideal guide is your daughter Elizabeth.
You stay away from my daughters.
Consider this your one warning.
Well, if I'm so dangerous, who shall be administering this test? The only student who'll come back to life if you kill him.
Pretty much everyone gets along here.
Um, there are other supernatural schools, I guess, but we're the only one that integrates all three factions.
It can be a little overwhelming for new students.
'Tis not three factions.
'Tis four.
Tell me, what powers does a phoenix possess? Surely, it's more than merely dying often.
That's, uh That's kind of it.
I'm cool with it, though.
I mean, everyone else has the hero angle covered here.
- I'm better as a sidekick.
- Mm.
I imagine it would be nice not to be killed quite so easily.
Sorry about last time, by the way.
No worries.
You're not the first person around here who's killed me.
- Hey.
- Hi.
How's it going? What-What's up? (JOSIE CLEARS THROAT) The usual.
Getting rid of magical evidence before my dad overreacts.
- Sure.
- Anyways, see you later.
SEBASTIAN: Is this what they call "teen drama"? Shut up.
Hey.
Hey.
How's it Uh, hi.
- Josie didn't leave because of me, right? - I hope not.
- Um, you're all moved in? - Yeah.
Um, Alyssa Chang generously gave me back 20% of my room.
Plenty of space for the nine things I still own.
- What's going on? - Uh, Dr.
Saltzman is having me test Sebastian here to see if he can stay at the school.
Call if you need backup? I can assure you, I will be on my best behavior.
Even a sidekick can handle me.
NECROMANCER: This is a charade.
We shouldn't be here cleaning congealed dairy and sugar.
- We should be kings.
- People should tremble at the sound of our names.
Preach.
Power, Chad! That's what I'm talking about.
Real power.
- Cash money.
- No! Not money.
Any fool can get rich.
Oh, right.
Necromancy.
Dominion over life and death.
The ability to bend the universe to your will.
Like that sweet gig you used to have.
Walking around, being your own boss, raising people from the dead.
- You believe my story? - Of course.
I'm into all that stuff the government doesn't want us to know about UFOs, lizard men, Bigfoot.
I just wish I could've seen you kick ass back in the day.
Maybe you're not too late.
Rise.
Rise.
(SHORT LAUGH) - (LAUGHING) - Did you just ? I've been practicing.
Now you've witnessed my sorcery, I have one question for you, Chad.
Will you be my acolyte? Hell yeah.
What-What's an acolyte? It's a fancy word for "follower".
Where are we going? We're going back to the way things used to be.
Because somehow I'm gonna become the Necromancer again.
- Rise, feline.
- Rise.
(WHISPERING): How long's it supposed to take? (GROANS) I don't know, Chad.
Cockroaches are child's play compared to more complex animals.
Ev-Eventually you work your way back up to humans, right? All in good time, my acolyte.
Malivore took my powers, but he couldn't take my birthright a propensity for magic.
Now I need to rebuild my skills, step by step.
Why do you think Malivore did this to you? Well, if you were promised peace, why did he send you here? I'm sure he was jealous of my power.
That I was the only one who was smart enough to outfox Oh, that's strange.
I can't remember who I stole the knife from.
I mean, I remember the man with the anger issues and the impressive jawline, but there was someone else.
(CAT MEOWS) (GASPS) Ah.
(SCREAMING) (SCREAMING) (INDISTINCT CROWD CHATTER) So you get to see all of these amazing alternate universes, but then, eventually, everything just resets back to normal, and the heroes don't even remember any of it? Lame.
(LAUGHS, SIGHS) I got to say, I'm surprised you wanted to hang out.
I thought you weren't gonna talk to me ever again.
Gaslighting me was a reprehensible act, but keep supplying me with superheroes in spandex, and we'll call it a wash.
(SIGHS) Okay.
Come clean.
You-you hate all this nerdy stuff.
Okay, fine.
I'm trying not to have sex with Sebastian again.
I thought you hated him, too.
I did.
I mean, I do.
I just I'm also incredibly turned on by him.
Oh, I don't need to hear any of this.
So we're we've been having a lot of sex.
And-and my mind is telling me to stop, but apparently my body didn't get the message about how much of a feminist I am.
So I'm trying to avoid him until he is inevitably kicked out of school.
And comic books are the literary equivalent of a cold shower.
That's actually a graphic novel.
Okay, yeah, that's good.
Keep saying stuff like that.
No.
This is a seminal work of fiction, not something to run your horny clock out.
- (SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE) - (CLATTERS) (BURPS) Come on, man.
Get get up! You-you can't just mope around like this.
You-you want to do magic or something? Hmm.
Pointless! Ah, I was foolish to think I could reclaim my former glory.
It took me centuries to become the Necromancer in the first place! You can't give up on your dreams, man! You should fight him.
We both should fight him.
Where is Malivore right now? He's a sentient pit of black goo in rural Georgia.
Okay.
Well, then we pee on him.
Yeah.
We take a leak right in that pit.
That'll show him who's boss.
Yeah.
Yeah! (TENNIS SHOES SQUEAKING, BALL BOUNCING) (INDISTINCT CHATTER) - (GRUNTS) - JED: Hey.
- Have you heard from Raf? - Uh, he's staying with his dad for a bit.
I think it'll be good for him.
Tell, uh, Captain Cheekbones he's got a weird staring problem.
(LAUGHS AIRILY) LANDON: It's okay.
Lots of vampires can't be around one werewolf, let alone this many.
Most vampires can't control their emotions.
Downside of all the power, I guess.
I think having no power would be far more concerning.
You know, a little blonde birdie told me that Clarke almost killed Hope.
She was powerless and running for her life, and you were you were you were searching for yourself? I was trying to keep everyone safe.
And did it work? Mm.
Not that you could have done anything anyway, of course, but if the girl that I had loved was in danger, I would want to be able to protect her.
He'll play.
- Two, three - (WHISTLE BLOWS) I used to worry about the way that I walk - (GRUNTING) - Like, was I talking too loud? And could I hang with the jocks? It's never easy to be different inside - OTHERS: Oh! - But when you don't give a - It's just like riding a bike - (GRUNTING) I try to tell 'em "See ya later!" I send my love to all the haters Yeah, I just wanna let 'em know (LAUGHING) Well played, my lupine friend.
- Rematch anytime, bloodsucker.
- (LAUGHING): Anytime.
This baby don't cry.
This is fun.
(GRUNTS) - Oh, Malivore! - You have visitors.
We brought you a little pre (UNZIPS) Pit is empty.
Someone closed the portal.
(LAUGHS) Malivore was defeated.
You were right.
And if Malivore can be beaten, anything's possible.
(LAUGHING): Oh.
I can fulfill my destiny.
That's what I'm talking about! Yeah.
So-so what do we do next? How do we level you up? Oh, dark sorcery requires a steep price to be paid in exchange for power.
I'm afraid I must sacrifice that which I hold most dear.
- What's that? - The only thing in this wretched existence I've grown fond of.
(BOTH GRUNT) (OPERA PLAYING) NECROMANCER: Rise.
- Come back to this plane.
- There you are.
(LAUGHING) Dude.
What happened to your face? This is my true face.
Behold the mark of the underworld.
- Wait.
Did you kill me? - Technically.
But I always intended to raise you from perdition.
What? Shouldn't you have warned me or something? Uh, you're missing the headline, Chad.
I can now raise humans.
Well, I'm not a zombie, though, right? - You can't, like, control me? - Try this on.
- What's this? - Iconic! I must become a mysterious symbol that both terrifies and intrigues my acolytes.
- Acolytes, plural? - Fear not.
It's all part of my master plan.
- I'll catch you up on the way.
- Where are we going? To a place of immense magical energy, a place where so many people have died, the very ground courses with blood and power.
Have you ever been to Virginia? ALYSSA: Hey, Greasley, I heard he's moving in on your girl.
Is that him? Well, she's not my girl, and can I sit with you and the witches? I've had enough of vampires today.
ALYSSA: Oh, you're our favorite vampire.
If you hate him, we hate him.
He makes us look bad with his old-ass Dracula ways.
So run him out.
He's doing his behavioral tests.
- Make him fail.
- How? Find me a Band-Aid, will you? So, you get along with the wolves.
Now we just have to see if you fit in with the vampires here.
Uh, we can hang out while they eat.
Or drink, I guess.
Animal blood, of course.
Of course.
(PLATE SHATTERS) It slipped.
(VAMPIRES HISSING) Code red.
Vamps, clear out.
Now! Jed, calm your pack down.
(PACK SNARLING) Wolves, follow me.
(EXHALES DEEPLY) Breathe, Milton, breathe! Focus only on the sound of my voice.
Breathe! Breathe.
- Breathe.
- (MILTON SHUDDERING) Breathe.
The urge will pass.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
The witch, she broke that plate on purpose.
Between her and your budding Ripper, are you sure it is me that you should be worried about? (CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (PANTING HEAVILY) This is it.
A site of almost unlimited magical power.
- (CHUCKLES) - Huh.
I thought it'd be bigger.
Chad, please! I will consecrate the ground.
Then we will set a trap for the next hapless soul who wanders through.
You never said anything about that.
To seal my bond to this place and draw from the mystical hot spot beneath, I'll need to murder.
A murder of pure, unbridled cruelty.
(LAUGHS) What's that? Um, an assignment that Clarke had me working on when he was pretending to be Headmaster Vardemus.
Well, Clarke's dead, so I'm pretty sure you don't have to turn that in.
I was actually just working on getting rid of it.
So, should be easy.
Magic nullification? Those are advanced chain spells.
You would need another witch.
What kind of assignment was it? I can help.
I'm sure we can handle it.
I mean, it could be good practice for us.
Have fun.
Thank you.
Uh, but I actually don't need any help, so Lizzie told me about the Sandclock.
She thought I could help.
How? My friend Vincent told me a story about Mora Miseriums that hold the effects of black magic, and how dangerous they can be if they break.
Look, you can't nullify the black magic inside, but you can put a protective barrier around the outside.
And I know a good spell for that.
Oh they have a Mora Miserium.
In one stroke, it could restore my power.
Yeah.
You recall the girl who suddenly returned to my memory, the Tribrid? Yeah, she'll be an obstacle.
We may have to kill her.
Might as well kill all her friends while we're at it, eh? Yeah.
Okay, this is the final part of the test: hanging with the witches.
Um, I'm warning you, don't push any buttons.
Or you'll do what, die all over me? It's not me you should be worried about.
Will you relax? Witches love me.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER) Hello, Elizabeth.
Oh hey.
Oh, you again.
I must say you just heal quickly.
Right? It's like magic or something.
And what magic is that crystal ball for? Empathic trances.
It lets us read feelings that are buried deep down.
Can we read yours? Vampires have heightened emotions.
It'll be a total rush.
I, for one, would like that.
Then of course.
I do love a good parlor trick.
I sense fear.
The modern world is terrifying to you.
You're afraid they won't let you stay here at the school.
- That's not true.
- You're afraid they're gonna find out all the things you've done and throw you away, like trash off the side of a boat.
Stop.
Maybe we should You know Lizzie's better than you and that you don't deserve her.
(GRUNTS) (HIGH-PITCHED TONE SOUNDING) (PAINED CRYING) Stop! Stop! Let him go.
(PANTING) (PANTING) Have you come to gloat, Landon? I just wanted to see if you were okay.
The fundamental truth is that I am not.
When I was eight years old, my parents, they sold me to a merchant ship.
I hated that life, so every port we sailed to, I ran away.
But the crew, they always found me again.
And they devised very special punishments for me.
This is a cruel world, Landon, and I expect very little from it.
But Elizabeth wants me, and I want her, too.
I guess none of that matters now since I failed your test.
- It's actually kind of beautiful.
- I guess.
If you can look past the visions of doom.
Thank you for doing this.
I couldn't have done this without you.
No, thank you.
This is the most normal I've felt all day.
You should know Vincent also told me that the Sandclock degrades over time.
At some point, it will break down from the inside no matter what we do.
But this will at least give us some time to figure out how to defuse it.
The endless of darkness is hovering Why did Clarke choose me? You're a trusting person.
And you're more powerful than you know.
I don't want to be either of those things.
The second that he had me doing black magic, my head it's like it's not mine anymore.
I get upset more easily, I'm on edge.
Taking me, taking me Jealous.
It's not all the magic.
Ooh This pull is astronomical When I got out of Malivore, um, I came here.
It was the first place I wanted to be.
I'm drawn to the unknown, where shadows hide You guys were the first people I wanted to see.
I snuck onto campus.
Um Something inside of me You and Landon were having movie night, or something, at the mill.
- I saw you - Hope.
You both looked so happy.
Ooh And I was so jealous.
Is astronomical If the wrong person crossed my path in that moment, I can't imagine the damage I would have done.
How did you move past it? I tried to move on.
And I got a lot of that wrong, too.
Obviously.
But that doesn't mean we can't try again.
Is astronomical.
(KNOCK ON DOOR) What are you reading? (CHUCKLES) It's a book Dorian got me.
It's about a band of marauding pirate vampires.
Sounds high concept.
Uh, we finished the tour tests, whatever.
And? Sebastian's no more dangerous than anyone else at this school.
(CHUCKLES) Well, I am surprised to hear that.
Thank you, Landon.
For whatever it's worth, coming from the guy who stole a magical artifact that kick-started the apocalypse sometimes people just need a chance to get things right.
(MUSIC PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES) Such a motormouth Don't care what she's about Everybody's like She's the last payback There's not any doubt (GASPS) I could hear your music from miles away.
Ah.
(GASPS) (CRUNCHING, SQUISHING) (GRUNTS) (GROANING) (LAUGHING) (GRUNTING) Oh.
I didn't think you had it in you.
You were talking about killing kids.
I had to stop you.
You can't stop me, Chad.
You're not in control of yourself anymore.
I'm not your friend.
I'm your eternal master.
(LAUGHS) Now kneel.
(CHUCKLES) I think I figured it out.
Oh, yeah? Why Malivore did it to you.
What if he wasn't screwing you over? What if he made you human to give you a shot at peace? And if you could have just lived that life well, you might have gotten there.
He gave you a chance to start over.
And you blew it, Ted.
Don't ever call me that again.
My name is The Necromancer.
You seem pleased with yourself.
(GROANING) - How did you find me? - You think I'm gonna let you walk around my school without an active locator spell? I know who you are now.
And I can't let you loose in the world.
But I know even vampires can change.
So I'm gonna give you a chance to prove me wrong about you.
But you're gonna have to follow my rules.
I don't follow orders anymore.
Then you're gonna have to go back in the box.
I'll just get out again.
And it will be your daughter who sets me free.
Yeah, you see, I can control her mind.
Oh, how I love that control.
I've had her, you know.
All over your school.
Mm-hmm, yes.
No matter what you do or where you go, you will not be able to protect her from me.
And you will fail as her father over and over and over again.
The only way is to kill me.
(GRUNTS) NECROMANCER: And with one swift stroke, I decapitated the decoy.
- Now behold the real son of Malivore.
- The circle is ready, master.
Is that sarcasm in your voice? Let's not ruin this momentous occasion with a tone, Chad.
Bring me the Crane's Foot.
(GRUNTS) (CHUCKLES) All right, son of Malivore.
Let's make ourselves a portal.
(CHANTS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (CACKLES) ("WORDS AIN'T ENOUGH" BY TESSA VIOLET PLAYING) Hey.
Oh.
Done already? All right.
So what do you want next? What's the mood? Today sucked.
You got anything for that? (QUIETLY): Let's see.
I got a feeling your day's about to get a lot better.
Yeah.
Have you met my new intern yet? You're proud But you're cold when it counts (CHUCKLES): Kym.
JOSIE: I should have asked for help sooner.
I was so worried that the Sandclock would break, and all that magic would come back to me and I'd end up hurting someone.
But it didn't.
We're all safe.
I know, and, um, I didn't ask because I thought that I'd be okay seeing you and Hope together, but it actually kind of just feels, like, really lonely.
And it's kind of just what I do.
I push people away when I need them most.
Because I'm ridiculous.
Would it make you feel better to hear how I was ridiculous today? Yeah.
Um When Sebastian flipped out on the witches, I realized there was nothing I could do to help.
I'm not one of the heroes here, and I thought I was okay with it.
But now I don't know.
It's not too late to become one.
And you are not ridiculous.
I missed talking to you like this.
(LAUGHS) I want us to be friends.
Not like ex friends, like actual friends.
(LAUGHS): That sounds nice.
(DOOR OPENS) What's all this? Carve me up into Just a little something to make you feel more at home.
To choose, till I'm only pieces of you So you can say you love me, but JOSIE: It's not exactly how it was, but we thought maybe you might like it if we changed it up a little bit.
(LAUGHS SOFTLY) So you can say you love me (SOFT LAUGHTER) But words ain't enough.
Dad.
You kicked Sebastian out, right? Uh I gave him the option to follow the rules.
But he, he chose to leave instead.
So he didn't want to stay.
No.
Good.
That's-that's good.
Uh, honestly, I, I'm just relieved that he's gone.
(CRYING): No, i-it's good.
It's a good thing.
(QUIETLY): Oh, I'm sorry.
Aw (CRYING) (SNIFFLES) (THUNDER CRASHES) (NECROMANCER CHUCKLES) I don't see anything.
I do.
(CREATURE GROWLS) (NECROMANCER LAUGHS) (GROWLING) (GASPS) - (LOW GROWL) - (CHUCKLES) Hello there, my new friend.
Malivore promised you peace, didn't he? I have a much better offer.
I can grant you freedom from death.
All you have to do is pay a visit to the Salvatore School and bring me back what I need.
So I have to leave Mystic Falls knowing that they'll follow me.
Every monster that comes out of that portal wants him for Malivore.
I am not here for Landon Kirby.
You serve a new master.
(LAUGHING) ALARIC: And who the hell are you? NECROMANCER: Bringer of life and death.
The cursed king of the underworld.
The Necromancer! - (RUMBLING) - Oh, the knife is destroyed.
One lock is released.
And with it so am I.
(GRUNTS) (GRUNTS) Hey.
You can't sleep here.
I wasn't sleeping, you thundering dolt! I was magically transported here to this What is this place? It's a strip mall.
And you're gonna have to magically transport somewhere else, 'cause it's also private property.
Worm! Do you have any idea to whom you speak? I am the Necro Oh! Oh! (BREATHING SHAKILY) What did Malivore do to me? No idea.
But if you don't leave here, - I'm-a have to call the cops.
- Silence! My powers.
He took them.
Oh, but we had a deal! He promised me! - Okay, cops it is.
- (PHONE DIALING) Wait.
Tell me.
Am I in peace? Buddy, you're in Texas.
(SIGHS) - HOPE: Starting over.
- In theory, it's simple.
You put the past behind you, take what you learned and begin again.
But it's not as easy as it sounds.
Moving on means letting things go.
Things that are familiar, easy, safe.
Things that matter.
Someone once said you can't go home again.
I hope like hell they were wrong.
Oh.
It's just you.
Alyssa, what's all this? I moved in while you were forgotten or whatever.
Your side's over there.
I usually have a single.
Which is what I had until this exact moment.
I go to bed at 10:00, so no late-night visitors.
And I don't want ants, so no eating in the room.
- Later, roomie.
- (COUGHS) (SIGHS) (SCOFFS) (SIGHS) You're late for class.
- Or are you lost? - Uh, both.
Apparently, everything changed when I was gone.
- Where's spell lab? - No idea.
I'm a little out of the loop myself.
(CHUCKLES) I just like to stride confidently and, uh, nod in hopes that people don't figure that out.
But speaking of being out of the loop, Lizzie and Josie are avoiding me.
- Why? What's up? - (CHUCKLES): I wouldn't know.
Things are still awkward between me and Josie.
I mean, I thought they were okay.
It's just bad again.
Yeah, well, knowing you and Landon are together and seeing it are two very different things.
I just wish there was something I could do.
You just have to give her some time, you know? Things will go back to normal soon enough.
I hope.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah.
- Spell lab.
- Oh! - Ric.
- Mm.
- So, I touched base with Caroline.
- Mm.
She wants us to track down the real Vardemus - and make sure he's okay.
- (EXHALES) I'm more concerned about the fake Vardemus enrolling a 500-year-old vampire in my absence.
Technically, Sebastian was in a coffin for 483 of them, but yeah.
Yeah, but we have our recruitment bylaws.
Which Vardemus revised.
Not to mention a lengthy admission process.
Which he waived.
Do you know that he got rid of the espresso machine? He was more of a tea person.
Look, I need to know more about this Sebastian.
We can't blindly let him in here without knowing more about his history.
You're right.
I'll have my intern do a deep dive into the historical records to see if there's any trace of him.
You have an intern? Dad.
Hi.
Liz-bear.
- You're late for class.
- Oh.
Um, I I got distracted, and I lost track of time.
But it was it was dumb and irresponsible, and it will never happen again.
If you're happy and you know it - Clap your hands - If you're happy and you know it Clap your hands If you're happy and you know it Then your face will surely show it If you're happy and you know it - Clap your hands.
- (EMPLOYEES CLAP) (SIGHS) Hear me, insect.
This is the master of death calling to you.
Rise.
MAN: Uh Ted? Got a sec? You know, it's crazy hat day, and you're not wearing a crazy hat.
How could I make such a mistake? Look.
(CLEARS THROAT) I don't think of myself as your boss.
I think of myself as your friend.
And bottom line is I need my friends to be on time, participate in spirit days and, most of all, sing when someone puts money in the jar.
Think you can do that? Sure.
Gary.
(CLICKS TONGUE) (HITS COUNTER) Don't let him get to you, man.
No one gets to me.
I just get so mad, you know? One time he pissed me off, I toasted his phone with the waffle cones.
That was you? That masterstroke provided me the only smile I've had this month.
- Sick.
- (EXHALES) Chad.
I'm the Ted.
I'm Ted.
(CLEARS THROAT) Hey, Jo.
Uh, what's up? Hey.
I got you some brownies.
Um, I have to run, though.
I love you.
(CHUCKLES) Love you, too.
(CLEARS THROAT) Sebastian.
Sit.
(SIGHS) Sebastian, our school was founded to keep young supernaturals safe from the world.
Well, my impression is that it exists to keep the world safe from us.
It's a balance.
Look, I'm not convinced you belong here.
We don't admit vampires over the age of 17.
But (SIGHS) Since you've been stuck in that coffin, I might make an exception if you pass our tests.
So today you will spend time with the various factions.
The goal is to see if you can control your basic urges.
You know who would be an ideal guide is your daughter Elizabeth.
You stay away from my daughters.
Consider this your one warning.
Well, if I'm so dangerous, who shall be administering this test? The only student who'll come back to life if you kill him.
Pretty much everyone gets along here.
Um, there are other supernatural schools, I guess, but we're the only one that integrates all three factions.
It can be a little overwhelming for new students.
'Tis not three factions.
'Tis four.
Tell me, what powers does a phoenix possess? Surely, it's more than merely dying often.
That's, uh That's kind of it.
I'm cool with it, though.
I mean, everyone else has the hero angle covered here.
- I'm better as a sidekick.
- Mm.
I imagine it would be nice not to be killed quite so easily.
Sorry about last time, by the way.
No worries.
You're not the first person around here who's killed me.
- Hey.
- Hi.
How's it going? What-What's up? (JOSIE CLEARS THROAT) The usual.
Getting rid of magical evidence before my dad overreacts.
- Sure.
- Anyways, see you later.
SEBASTIAN: Is this what they call "teen drama"? Shut up.
Hey.
Hey.
How's it Uh, hi.
- Josie didn't leave because of me, right? - I hope not.
- Um, you're all moved in? - Yeah.
Um, Alyssa Chang generously gave me back 20% of my room.
Plenty of space for the nine things I still own.
- What's going on? - Uh, Dr.
Saltzman is having me test Sebastian here to see if he can stay at the school.
Call if you need backup? I can assure you, I will be on my best behavior.
Even a sidekick can handle me.
NECROMANCER: This is a charade.
We shouldn't be here cleaning congealed dairy and sugar.
- We should be kings.
- People should tremble at the sound of our names.
Preach.
Power, Chad! That's what I'm talking about.
Real power.
- Cash money.
- No! Not money.
Any fool can get rich.
Oh, right.
Necromancy.
Dominion over life and death.
The ability to bend the universe to your will.
Like that sweet gig you used to have.
Walking around, being your own boss, raising people from the dead.
- You believe my story? - Of course.
I'm into all that stuff the government doesn't want us to know about UFOs, lizard men, Bigfoot.
I just wish I could've seen you kick ass back in the day.
Maybe you're not too late.
Rise.
Rise.
(SHORT LAUGH) - (LAUGHING) - Did you just ? I've been practicing.
Now you've witnessed my sorcery, I have one question for you, Chad.
Will you be my acolyte? Hell yeah.
What-What's an acolyte? It's a fancy word for "follower".
Where are we going? We're going back to the way things used to be.
Because somehow I'm gonna become the Necromancer again.
- Rise, feline.
- Rise.
(WHISPERING): How long's it supposed to take? (GROANS) I don't know, Chad.
Cockroaches are child's play compared to more complex animals.
Ev-Eventually you work your way back up to humans, right? All in good time, my acolyte.
Malivore took my powers, but he couldn't take my birthright a propensity for magic.
Now I need to rebuild my skills, step by step.
Why do you think Malivore did this to you? Well, if you were promised peace, why did he send you here? I'm sure he was jealous of my power.
That I was the only one who was smart enough to outfox Oh, that's strange.
I can't remember who I stole the knife from.
I mean, I remember the man with the anger issues and the impressive jawline, but there was someone else.
(CAT MEOWS) (GASPS) Ah.
(SCREAMING) (SCREAMING) (INDISTINCT CROWD CHATTER) So you get to see all of these amazing alternate universes, but then, eventually, everything just resets back to normal, and the heroes don't even remember any of it? Lame.
(LAUGHS, SIGHS) I got to say, I'm surprised you wanted to hang out.
I thought you weren't gonna talk to me ever again.
Gaslighting me was a reprehensible act, but keep supplying me with superheroes in spandex, and we'll call it a wash.
(SIGHS) Okay.
Come clean.
You-you hate all this nerdy stuff.
Okay, fine.
I'm trying not to have sex with Sebastian again.
I thought you hated him, too.
I did.
I mean, I do.
I just I'm also incredibly turned on by him.
Oh, I don't need to hear any of this.
So we're we've been having a lot of sex.
And-and my mind is telling me to stop, but apparently my body didn't get the message about how much of a feminist I am.
So I'm trying to avoid him until he is inevitably kicked out of school.
And comic books are the literary equivalent of a cold shower.
That's actually a graphic novel.
Okay, yeah, that's good.
Keep saying stuff like that.
No.
This is a seminal work of fiction, not something to run your horny clock out.
- (SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE) - (CLATTERS) (BURPS) Come on, man.
Get get up! You-you can't just mope around like this.
You-you want to do magic or something? Hmm.
Pointless! Ah, I was foolish to think I could reclaim my former glory.
It took me centuries to become the Necromancer in the first place! You can't give up on your dreams, man! You should fight him.
We both should fight him.
Where is Malivore right now? He's a sentient pit of black goo in rural Georgia.
Okay.
Well, then we pee on him.
Yeah.
We take a leak right in that pit.
That'll show him who's boss.
Yeah.
Yeah! (TENNIS SHOES SQUEAKING, BALL BOUNCING) (INDISTINCT CHATTER) - (GRUNTS) - JED: Hey.
- Have you heard from Raf? - Uh, he's staying with his dad for a bit.
I think it'll be good for him.
Tell, uh, Captain Cheekbones he's got a weird staring problem.
(LAUGHS AIRILY) LANDON: It's okay.
Lots of vampires can't be around one werewolf, let alone this many.
Most vampires can't control their emotions.
Downside of all the power, I guess.
I think having no power would be far more concerning.
You know, a little blonde birdie told me that Clarke almost killed Hope.
She was powerless and running for her life, and you were you were you were searching for yourself? I was trying to keep everyone safe.
And did it work? Mm.
Not that you could have done anything anyway, of course, but if the girl that I had loved was in danger, I would want to be able to protect her.
He'll play.
- Two, three - (WHISTLE BLOWS) I used to worry about the way that I walk - (GRUNTING) - Like, was I talking too loud? And could I hang with the jocks? It's never easy to be different inside - OTHERS: Oh! - But when you don't give a - It's just like riding a bike - (GRUNTING) I try to tell 'em "See ya later!" I send my love to all the haters Yeah, I just wanna let 'em know (LAUGHING) Well played, my lupine friend.
- Rematch anytime, bloodsucker.
- (LAUGHING): Anytime.
This baby don't cry.
This is fun.
(GRUNTS) - Oh, Malivore! - You have visitors.
We brought you a little pre (UNZIPS) Pit is empty.
Someone closed the portal.
(LAUGHS) Malivore was defeated.
You were right.
And if Malivore can be beaten, anything's possible.
(LAUGHING): Oh.
I can fulfill my destiny.
That's what I'm talking about! Yeah.
So-so what do we do next? How do we level you up? Oh, dark sorcery requires a steep price to be paid in exchange for power.
I'm afraid I must sacrifice that which I hold most dear.
- What's that? - The only thing in this wretched existence I've grown fond of.
(BOTH GRUNT) (OPERA PLAYING) NECROMANCER: Rise.
- Come back to this plane.
- There you are.
(LAUGHING) Dude.
What happened to your face? This is my true face.
Behold the mark of the underworld.
- Wait.
Did you kill me? - Technically.
But I always intended to raise you from perdition.
What? Shouldn't you have warned me or something? Uh, you're missing the headline, Chad.
I can now raise humans.
Well, I'm not a zombie, though, right? - You can't, like, control me? - Try this on.
- What's this? - Iconic! I must become a mysterious symbol that both terrifies and intrigues my acolytes.
- Acolytes, plural? - Fear not.
It's all part of my master plan.
- I'll catch you up on the way.
- Where are we going? To a place of immense magical energy, a place where so many people have died, the very ground courses with blood and power.
Have you ever been to Virginia? ALYSSA: Hey, Greasley, I heard he's moving in on your girl.
Is that him? Well, she's not my girl, and can I sit with you and the witches? I've had enough of vampires today.
ALYSSA: Oh, you're our favorite vampire.
If you hate him, we hate him.
He makes us look bad with his old-ass Dracula ways.
So run him out.
He's doing his behavioral tests.
- Make him fail.
- How? Find me a Band-Aid, will you? So, you get along with the wolves.
Now we just have to see if you fit in with the vampires here.
Uh, we can hang out while they eat.
Or drink, I guess.
Animal blood, of course.
Of course.
(PLATE SHATTERS) It slipped.
(VAMPIRES HISSING) Code red.
Vamps, clear out.
Now! Jed, calm your pack down.
(PACK SNARLING) Wolves, follow me.
(EXHALES DEEPLY) Breathe, Milton, breathe! Focus only on the sound of my voice.
Breathe! Breathe.
- Breathe.
- (MILTON SHUDDERING) Breathe.
The urge will pass.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
The witch, she broke that plate on purpose.
Between her and your budding Ripper, are you sure it is me that you should be worried about? (CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (PANTING HEAVILY) This is it.
A site of almost unlimited magical power.
- (CHUCKLES) - Huh.
I thought it'd be bigger.
Chad, please! I will consecrate the ground.
Then we will set a trap for the next hapless soul who wanders through.
You never said anything about that.
To seal my bond to this place and draw from the mystical hot spot beneath, I'll need to murder.
A murder of pure, unbridled cruelty.
(LAUGHS) What's that? Um, an assignment that Clarke had me working on when he was pretending to be Headmaster Vardemus.
Well, Clarke's dead, so I'm pretty sure you don't have to turn that in.
I was actually just working on getting rid of it.
So, should be easy.
Magic nullification? Those are advanced chain spells.
You would need another witch.
What kind of assignment was it? I can help.
I'm sure we can handle it.
I mean, it could be good practice for us.
Have fun.
Thank you.
Uh, but I actually don't need any help, so Lizzie told me about the Sandclock.
She thought I could help.
How? My friend Vincent told me a story about Mora Miseriums that hold the effects of black magic, and how dangerous they can be if they break.
Look, you can't nullify the black magic inside, but you can put a protective barrier around the outside.
And I know a good spell for that.
Oh they have a Mora Miserium.
In one stroke, it could restore my power.
Yeah.
You recall the girl who suddenly returned to my memory, the Tribrid? Yeah, she'll be an obstacle.
We may have to kill her.
Might as well kill all her friends while we're at it, eh? Yeah.
Okay, this is the final part of the test: hanging with the witches.
Um, I'm warning you, don't push any buttons.
Or you'll do what, die all over me? It's not me you should be worried about.
Will you relax? Witches love me.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER) Hello, Elizabeth.
Oh hey.
Oh, you again.
I must say you just heal quickly.
Right? It's like magic or something.
And what magic is that crystal ball for? Empathic trances.
It lets us read feelings that are buried deep down.
Can we read yours? Vampires have heightened emotions.
It'll be a total rush.
I, for one, would like that.
Then of course.
I do love a good parlor trick.
I sense fear.
The modern world is terrifying to you.
You're afraid they won't let you stay here at the school.
- That's not true.
- You're afraid they're gonna find out all the things you've done and throw you away, like trash off the side of a boat.
Stop.
Maybe we should You know Lizzie's better than you and that you don't deserve her.
(GRUNTS) (HIGH-PITCHED TONE SOUNDING) (PAINED CRYING) Stop! Stop! Let him go.
(PANTING) (PANTING) Have you come to gloat, Landon? I just wanted to see if you were okay.
The fundamental truth is that I am not.
When I was eight years old, my parents, they sold me to a merchant ship.
I hated that life, so every port we sailed to, I ran away.
But the crew, they always found me again.
And they devised very special punishments for me.
This is a cruel world, Landon, and I expect very little from it.
But Elizabeth wants me, and I want her, too.
I guess none of that matters now since I failed your test.
- It's actually kind of beautiful.
- I guess.
If you can look past the visions of doom.
Thank you for doing this.
I couldn't have done this without you.
No, thank you.
This is the most normal I've felt all day.
You should know Vincent also told me that the Sandclock degrades over time.
At some point, it will break down from the inside no matter what we do.
But this will at least give us some time to figure out how to defuse it.
The endless of darkness is hovering Why did Clarke choose me? You're a trusting person.
And you're more powerful than you know.
I don't want to be either of those things.
The second that he had me doing black magic, my head it's like it's not mine anymore.
I get upset more easily, I'm on edge.
Taking me, taking me Jealous.
It's not all the magic.
Ooh This pull is astronomical When I got out of Malivore, um, I came here.
It was the first place I wanted to be.
I'm drawn to the unknown, where shadows hide You guys were the first people I wanted to see.
I snuck onto campus.
Um Something inside of me You and Landon were having movie night, or something, at the mill.
- I saw you - Hope.
You both looked so happy.
Ooh And I was so jealous.
Is astronomical If the wrong person crossed my path in that moment, I can't imagine the damage I would have done.
How did you move past it? I tried to move on.
And I got a lot of that wrong, too.
Obviously.
But that doesn't mean we can't try again.
Is astronomical.
(KNOCK ON DOOR) What are you reading? (CHUCKLES) It's a book Dorian got me.
It's about a band of marauding pirate vampires.
Sounds high concept.
Uh, we finished the tour tests, whatever.
And? Sebastian's no more dangerous than anyone else at this school.
(CHUCKLES) Well, I am surprised to hear that.
Thank you, Landon.
For whatever it's worth, coming from the guy who stole a magical artifact that kick-started the apocalypse sometimes people just need a chance to get things right.
(MUSIC PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES) Such a motormouth Don't care what she's about Everybody's like She's the last payback There's not any doubt (GASPS) I could hear your music from miles away.
Ah.
(GASPS) (CRUNCHING, SQUISHING) (GRUNTS) (GROANING) (LAUGHING) (GRUNTING) Oh.
I didn't think you had it in you.
You were talking about killing kids.
I had to stop you.
You can't stop me, Chad.
You're not in control of yourself anymore.
I'm not your friend.
I'm your eternal master.
(LAUGHS) Now kneel.
(CHUCKLES) I think I figured it out.
Oh, yeah? Why Malivore did it to you.
What if he wasn't screwing you over? What if he made you human to give you a shot at peace? And if you could have just lived that life well, you might have gotten there.
He gave you a chance to start over.
And you blew it, Ted.
Don't ever call me that again.
My name is The Necromancer.
You seem pleased with yourself.
(GROANING) - How did you find me? - You think I'm gonna let you walk around my school without an active locator spell? I know who you are now.
And I can't let you loose in the world.
But I know even vampires can change.
So I'm gonna give you a chance to prove me wrong about you.
But you're gonna have to follow my rules.
I don't follow orders anymore.
Then you're gonna have to go back in the box.
I'll just get out again.
And it will be your daughter who sets me free.
Yeah, you see, I can control her mind.
Oh, how I love that control.
I've had her, you know.
All over your school.
Mm-hmm, yes.
No matter what you do or where you go, you will not be able to protect her from me.
And you will fail as her father over and over and over again.
The only way is to kill me.
(GRUNTS) NECROMANCER: And with one swift stroke, I decapitated the decoy.
- Now behold the real son of Malivore.
- The circle is ready, master.
Is that sarcasm in your voice? Let's not ruin this momentous occasion with a tone, Chad.
Bring me the Crane's Foot.
(GRUNTS) (CHUCKLES) All right, son of Malivore.
Let's make ourselves a portal.
(CHANTS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (CACKLES) ("WORDS AIN'T ENOUGH" BY TESSA VIOLET PLAYING) Hey.
Oh.
Done already? All right.
So what do you want next? What's the mood? Today sucked.
You got anything for that? (QUIETLY): Let's see.
I got a feeling your day's about to get a lot better.
Yeah.
Have you met my new intern yet? You're proud But you're cold when it counts (CHUCKLES): Kym.
JOSIE: I should have asked for help sooner.
I was so worried that the Sandclock would break, and all that magic would come back to me and I'd end up hurting someone.
But it didn't.
We're all safe.
I know, and, um, I didn't ask because I thought that I'd be okay seeing you and Hope together, but it actually kind of just feels, like, really lonely.
And it's kind of just what I do.
I push people away when I need them most.
Because I'm ridiculous.
Would it make you feel better to hear how I was ridiculous today? Yeah.
Um When Sebastian flipped out on the witches, I realized there was nothing I could do to help.
I'm not one of the heroes here, and I thought I was okay with it.
But now I don't know.
It's not too late to become one.
And you are not ridiculous.
I missed talking to you like this.
(LAUGHS) I want us to be friends.
Not like ex friends, like actual friends.
(LAUGHS): That sounds nice.
(DOOR OPENS) What's all this? Carve me up into Just a little something to make you feel more at home.
To choose, till I'm only pieces of you So you can say you love me, but JOSIE: It's not exactly how it was, but we thought maybe you might like it if we changed it up a little bit.
(LAUGHS SOFTLY) So you can say you love me (SOFT LAUGHTER) But words ain't enough.
Dad.
You kicked Sebastian out, right? Uh I gave him the option to follow the rules.
But he, he chose to leave instead.
So he didn't want to stay.
No.
Good.
That's-that's good.
Uh, honestly, I, I'm just relieved that he's gone.
(CRYING): No, i-it's good.
It's a good thing.
(QUIETLY): Oh, I'm sorry.
Aw (CRYING) (SNIFFLES) (THUNDER CRASHES) (NECROMANCER CHUCKLES) I don't see anything.
I do.
(CREATURE GROWLS) (NECROMANCER LAUGHS) (GROWLING) (GASPS) - (LOW GROWL) - (CHUCKLES) Hello there, my new friend.
Malivore promised you peace, didn't he? I have a much better offer.
I can grant you freedom from death.
All you have to do is pay a visit to the Salvatore School and bring me back what I need.