Love, Victor (2020) s02e09 Episode Script
Victor's Day Off
1
♪
VICTOR: Dear Simon,
I know it's been a minute
since I've reached out,
and you were probably thinking, "Wow!
I bet Victor finally
has his shit together."
But Simon, my shit is not together.
My shit is
Well, it's shit.
Benji wants to take a break from us.
We've been far from perfect lately,
but I thought we were strong
enough to get through anything.
And now, I'm not so sure.
So, I told off a priest.
Well, "telling off"
might be a bit strong.
Nobody had to hold my earrings,
but I did tell Father Lawrence
that we're quitting the church.
Cool.
And I found another
congregation in Five Points.
Their website says all are welcome,
which is Catholic for less homophobic.
Victor
- Is everything okay?
- Not really.
Well, is it something
you want to talk about?
No.
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
Ooh, yeah ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
Ooh, yeah ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
If you're wondering how he
gets his hair that perfect,
there isn't a pomade in the
world that can do that for you.
Should we shave his head
in his sleep and make a wig?
We could share it.
Okay, that was funny. Are you okay?
Benji and I are taking a
break. It was his choice.
- What? Why?
- I don't know. A lot of things.
I mean, he wasn't too thrilled
that I told you that he was in AA.
- Oh, no! I, I didn't tell anyone, I swear.
- No, no, no.
I know, and it's, it's not your fault.
I shouldn't have told you.
But it's not just that. We've been
fighting about everything lately.
He says he needs some time to
figure out if we still make sense.
- [BELL RINGS]
- And now I just have to sit next to him in pre-calc
and pretend like I'm not dying inside.
How are you supposed
to learn complex math
while having gay relationship drama?
Yeah, high school is demented.
Hey, what do you say we get out of here?
What do you mean? Like, skip school?
Scandalous, I know, but it
kind of works out for me, too.
I have this test in third period,
and I did not finish Lord of the Flies.
Who knew a bunch of hot British
boys getting stranded on an island
- could be so boring?
- [VICTOR CHUCKLES]
You're right. Let's get out of here.
But let's be stealthy about it.
I don't want to get in trouble.
Then fix your face and
unclench your butt cheeks,
'cause you look like you
just murdered your family,
embezzled your inheritance,
and started over in Boca Raton.
I watch a lot of true crime.
Somebody to tell me
it'll be all right ♪
Somebody to tell me
it'll be just fine ♪
If someone has been there
before, say it right now ♪
'Cause I just need to hear it ♪
♪
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
Ah, not that way.
That's where Mrs. Potemkin
goes to chain smoke
and cry about her dead marriage.
I should teach a master
class on skipping school.
Although, I'd probably skip that, too.
So, wait, how do you not get in trouble?
Doesn't the school call your parents?
Nope. I just email the school office
saying it's some made up Muslim holiday.
None of those old ladies in admin
want to go down for
religious perse-cush.
Yeah, you see, I don't think "Muslim
holiday" is gonna work for me.
What are you doing?
[PHONE RINGS]
[IMITATING ISABEL]: Hi, this is
Victah Salazah's mothah, Isabel?
Why are you pretending to
be my mom and not my dad?
[NORMAL VOICE]: Um, I don't
know what your dad sounds like.
- Well, neither do they!
- Okay, well, it's too late to switch now.
- [PHONE BEEPS]
- Ah, yeah, sorry about that. Um,
look, Victah's not gonna
be able to come in today.
Yeah, he'd kill me for telling you this,
but he got into some bad
chimichangas last night,
and let's just say he got
it comin' out of both ends.
Yeah Aw, thank you so much.
Aw, that's so sweet. Adios!
[IN NORMAL VOICE]: She said to feel
better and to drink lots of fluids.
I hate you so much right now.
I never would have pegged you
as the "cutting class" type.
Hey. Don't judge a book by
it's extremely chic cover.
It's just sometimes I feel like
all these Creekwood kids are living
in their happy little bubbles,
and I'm not like any of them.
Sometimes I feel outside of it all.
And when that happens, I
need to get out from under
the tragic fluorescent
lighting and breathe.
But today's your day to breathe.
So, what do you want to do?
I don't know.
I can't stop thinking about Benji.
I mean, we were supposed to go to
Mia's dad's wedding this weekend,
- and now
- Okay, so we just have to get your mind off of Benji.
But everywhere reminds me of him.
Okay, then we'll go somewhere you
and Benji have never been before.
A Benji memory-free zone.
I know just the place.
- SERVER: Here you go. Enjoy.
- Thanks.
Okay, what am I eating, and why
haven't I had it before? [LAUGHS]
It's Tahchin. A crispy
rice cake, with chicken.
Anytime I'm in my feels,
I have to have that.
It kind of reminds me of
my mom's arroz con pollo.
She used to make it
every Sunday after church.
Used to?
Well, now that she and
my dad are separated
Oh, yeah. How are things
going with that, by the way?
I don't know. It's on the long list
of things that we don't talk about.
What about you? How are
things with your parents?
Actually
Remember when I told you
I didn't finish Lord
of the Flies last night?
It's 'cause I was
coming out to my parents.
What? Rahim! Why didn't
you tell me before?
I don't know. You were
so bummed about Benji,
and I didn't want to
make today about me.
So, how did you do it?
This is humiliating,
but I wrote everything I
wanted to say on a notecard,
because I knew once I took it
out, I wouldn't be able to bail.
And I didn't. I, I read it to them,
and they sat there for
what felt like six years,
and my, my dad said, "I'm really
happy you finally told us."
Wait. They were glad that
you "finally" told them?
Okay, so apparently,
my mom had discovered
my internet search
history when I was twelve,
and saw that I had been Googling
"Tom Holland" plus "penis."
VICTOR: No! [LAUGHS]
- Tom Holland?
- I know.
Anyway, thank you.
For helping me be brave.
No. Rahim, you did that all on your own.
I'm I'm really proud of you.
[PHONE CHIMES]
Is something going on?
No. Sorry.
Victor?
Dad?
Victor, why aren't you in school?
That, that would be
my fault, Mr. Salazar.
I had to miss school today for the
Muslim Festival of a
Thousand Pistachios.
Very sacred.
Uh, Victor had a free period,
and he was kind enough
to bring me my homework
so I wouldn't fall behind.
- I'm Rahim, by the way.
- Hi.
Oh, uh, sorry. Uh, Victor,
this is, uh, my friend Shelby.
So nice to meet you, Victor.
Your dad talks about you all the time.
He does? When?
PFLAG. Shelby and I, we know
each other from the meetings.
Uh, Victor, can we talk for a second?
Happy holidays. I just love pistachios.
[BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY]
- Are you on a date right now?
- Shelby and I
Yes, we're seeing each other.
It's very new. It's too new to
tell you about, but here we are.
- Does Mom know?
- She does.
So, that's it?
You guys are never getting back
together? You're just giving up on her?
Victor, I'm not giving up on anything.
- You're dating other people.
- You're not even trying anymore.
Look, I think that this is
a much bigger conversation.
And maybe me catching
you skipping school
is not the best time to have it.
Your friend over there,
he's pretty smooth,
but I wasn't born yesterday.
Are you gonna tell Mom?
If you head back to class now,
maybe I'll forget to mention it.
VICTOR: I can't believe
my dad got a girlfriend.
God. How could he do this to my mom?
- Can I ask you a personal question?
- Mmm.
Do you think your parents
should get back together?
Like, do you think that
they're right for each other?
I don't know. I mean, last year,
they were constantly fighting.
And sometimes I just wished they'd
get the hell away from each other
and give us all a break.
Before that
They were pretty magic together.
I mean, they were our age
when they started dating.
But maybe that's part of the
problem. You know, like
what are the odds that the first
person you date is the person
you're supposed to end up with?
Okay, I don't care what your dad
says. We're not going back to school.
It's time to turn the
self-care up to an eleven.
VICTOR: You know, I've never
actually had a pedicure before.
You're acting like this is
news, but those hooves are rough.
Linda, Michelle, the
number 4 special, please.
"Oh oh aubergine" for me,
and "clear" for my very
wild friend over here.
- Okay. [LAUGHS]
- [PHONE ALERTS]
Okay, why do you keep grinning
at your phone like that?
- Did Tom Holland slide into your DMs?
- No!
Okay? It's just this guy Charlie
I've been talking to
on one of those apps.
- You know which one.
- Well, let me see.
Wait. Are all these
headless torsos in Atlanta?
This is just guys nearby.
Turns out there's a ton of
gay fish in the online sea.
And all the fish claim to have 9-inch dicks.
Yeah, all the fish kind of lie.
Like when Charlie and I started talking,
we both said we were twenty-two.
But turns out he's a
senior at Thadwick Academy.
- Thadwick?
- Mm-hmm.
Damn. Your boyfriend's bougie.
He's not my boyfriend, okay?
We, we haven't even met.
We just text a lot.
And send the occasional
mildly scandalous pic.
You should ask him if
he wants to meet up.
What, like now?
You said I get to pick what we
do today, and this is what I pick.
I can't believe I'm
actually gonna do this.
I feel a pimple starting on my chin,
and this isn't even one
of my top-tier outfits.
Well, lucky for you, we're in a spa.
Linda, Michelle, give him the works.
I have $17 in my wallet.
- Give him $17 worth of works.
- There we go.
RAHIM: Okay, you sure
you don't mind being here?
No. Benji's not working today.
And plus, I know where
we keep the pepper spray
in case Charlie turns out to
be a sixty-year-old murderer
whose kink is decapitating high
school students with a box cutter.
Do you think you're the only
person that watches true crime?
[RAHIM CHUCKLES]
Oh, my God. I think that's him.
Okay, I would so let him decapitate me.
- Maybe don't start with that.
- Right.
Go.
Charlie. Hi-yee!
I don't know why I just said
"hi" like that. I'm nervous.
- It's fine. Nice to meet you.
- Yeah.
You look just like your pics, thank God.
A lot of people use
those ring light things
that make their pores disappear,
and they end up looking like
hideous monsters in real life,
but you don't. So, drop
that skincare routine, sis!
- Thanks. Thank you.
- [RAHIM CHUCKLES]
What's good here?
Ah, well, the chili mocha
latte is my personal obsesh.
She's serving spicy,
she's serving sweet.
You need her in your life.
"Her" as in the, the coffee?
Uh, why don't you order,
and I'll grab us a table?
Hey, um
Sorry. Uh
You're, you're just
different from how I pictured.
- What do you mean?
- No, I just Like the
The way you talk.
And like, the way you are.
Sorry, I
I tend to go for guys who
are a bit more masculine?
No offense.
Oh.
CHARLIE: Yeah. It's just my preference.
RAHIM: Yeah. No, if you're not
into it, you're not into it.
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
I kind of wish he'd
decapitated me instead.
I'm so embarrassed.
I can't believe you just saw that.
No, he should be
embarrassed. What a dick.
No. I, I get it. If he's
into "masc" guys or whatever,
I'm never gonna be that.
I'm wearing lavender suede.
Okay, first off, that jacket
is fire, and you know it.
And secondly, don't let one stupid
boy ruin what's great about you.
Except it's not just one stupid boy.
You know, a lot of people see me
as just this funny, fruity beanpole,
- and nothing else.
- All right, that's bullshit.
You're tall, you're smart,
you're super handsome
Super handsome?
Stop. I'm just saying that objectively,
you're a very good looking guy.
Okay. Okay, this is the
content I signed up for.
Can you start an OnlyFans where
it's just you complimenting me?
Maybe in an ASMR whisper voice?
I'm trying to tell you something.
You're a catch, Rahim.
And, uh,
if we went to a gay bar,
you would totally clean up.
Well. I'm pretty sure you would
clean up at a gay bar, too.
If you were single. Which you're not.
Because things are gonna work
out between you and Benji.
Maybe. Or maybe not.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
It's just my mom.
Oh. Sorry.
You know what?
Why don't we go to a gay bar?
Really? I don't have,
like, an ID or anything.
So? I went to one in New York,
and they never even checked.
RAHIM: Ugh, no
Okay, we can do this.
Just act confident,
and try to make yourself look older,
like, like, beaten down by life.
Right.
- No. It's not gonna work.
- God, we're never gonna get in.
Screw it. Come on.
Remember this morning, when
you wouldn't even skip school?
Well, I guess you're a bad influence.
["PRIVATE LIFE" BY ALLIE X PLAYING]
Oh, I usually ♪
Wanna keep what's mine ♪
In my private life ♪
But I could let your eyes ♪
Take a peek inside ♪
In my private life ♪
VICTOR: Rahim?
Sorry. This is amazing.
I think if you keep
staring, you gotta tip him.
No, I, I mean all of this.
Everyone's
This is the first time in
my life where I feel like
I know.
Just give him a dollar.
All I know is when
you talk like that ♪
When you talk like
that, I don't get tired ♪
Your proximity to me
has got me up and wired ♪
Thought I was high ♪
VICTOR: Go.
Keep it going ♪
Dance till I ♪
Lose my mind ♪
In my private life ♪
Keep it going, keep it going ♪
Dance till I ♪
Lose my mind ♪
In my private life ♪
Keep it going ♪
You are so full of shit!
Your number one hottest thing
about a guy is his brain?
Yes! Like if a guy hits me up
and he says, "You're handsome,"
but spells it Y-O-U-R?
- Immediate block.
- [VICTOR SNICKERS]
Okay, so number one is smart.
- You big liar. Then what?
- Then
- A great smile.
- Um
Symmetrical eyebrows.
I wouldn't be mad at a cute hockey butt.
So, you're into athletes.
Their bodies, yes.
- Their personalities, not so much.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
What about you? What's your type?
Uh, Benji?
RAHIM: Your type is Benji?
Well, he was the first
guy that I ever kissed,
the first guy that I ever dated
I, I wasn't even sure I
was gay until I met him.
I mean, did I have a recurring dream
where Charlie Puth and I were
trapped in a jail cell? Sure.
Been there, dreamed that. [CHUCKLES]
But Benji was the only real life guy
that I ever considered going for.
Then you went for it.
And he went for you back.
That's more than a lot of us can say.
Listen, that guy at
Brasstown was a total asshole.
Yes, he was, but
What I meant was
I've never had what you and Benji have.
- I've never even kissed a guy before.
- Oh.
You will.
- [TAPPING ON MIC, MIC SQUEALS]
- DJ: Hey, it's karaoke time!
The first one of the
night is Victor and Rahim!
- What did you do?
- [LIGHT APPLAUSE]
Sorry, not sorry. Come on.
[CHEERING AND CLAPPING]
I hear a lot about sinners ♪
Don't think that I'll be a saint ♪
But I might go down to the river ♪
'Cause the way that the
sky opens up when we touch ♪
- Yeah, it's makin' me say ♪
- Okay
That the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
BOTH: Feels so holy,
holy, holy, holy, holy ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
'Cause the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so holy ♪
BOTH: They say we're too young and ♪
The pimps and the players
say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪
Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪
- But I don't know ♪
- Ah-ah, ah, ah ♪
They say we're too young and ♪
The pimps and the players
say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪
Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪
But I don't know ♪
The way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so holy, holy,
holy, holy, holy ♪
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
BOTH: On God, runnin' to
the altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
'Cause the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so ho-o-o-oly ♪
[CLAPPING AND CHEERING]
ISABEL: Victor Salazar!
- Oh, shit
- [PATRON WHISTLES]
We are so sorry, Mrs. Salazar.
But can I just say, vermilion
is totally your color.
How did you even find us?
A very worried woman
called me from your school,
asking if you were feeling any better
from the poisoned
chimichangas that I served you!
We're not even Mexican!
And then I used my motherly
instincts to track you down.
Your brother showed me
how to do "find my iPhone."
Rahim, can you give us a minute, please?
You're playing hooky
now? Hanging out at bars?
- When I tell Papi about this
- He knows already.
About the skipping school part, anyways.
We bumped into him at lunch,
and he was with some
woman that he's seeing.
Oh.
Yeah, so much for you and Dad being
the loves of each other's lives.
So, is this why you're acting out?
- Are you upset about me and Papi?
- No! I mean
I mean, maybe that's part of it, but
I think Benji's breaking up with me.
What? When did that happen?
Last night. We got into a huge
fight, and now he's not talking to me.
Mijo. Why didn't you
tell me about Benji?
Because I thought you might be happy.
Happy?
Victor
I need you to hear this.
Your happiness is my happiness.
If your heart is broken, so is mine.
And I know you said that
Papi is the love of my life.
That's only sort of true.
You kids are the love of my life.
There is nothing in this world
that is more precious to me.
And I know
that I didn't make you
feel that way this year.
I'll never forgive
myself for that, but
I accept you, Victor.
I, I love every single part of you.
And I will spend the rest of my life
to make sure that you know that. Okay?
And if things with
Benji are really over,
I know you'll find
another wonderful person.
I Not "person."
Another young man, who
is just right for you.
♪
Why do I keep having these life changing
moments outside of gay bars? [LAUGHS]
What?
How many gay bars have you been to?
I said "outside of gay bars."
Victor!
Super cool of your mom to
give me a ride, by the way.
I don't smell like alcohol, do I?
My mom doesn't even keep
mouthwash in the house,
'cause it's a slippery slope.
You smell normal.
Uh, hey
Um, I just wanted to, uh
thank you for cutting with me today.
- I had a lot of fun.
- Me, too.
- Best fake Muslim holiday ever.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
I should probably go inside
and finish Lord of the Flies.
Here's hoping they get rescued.
Or at least find some soap.
[BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY]
Goodnight, Rahim.
Goodnight.
♪
VICTOR: Hey.
[PHONE VIBRATES]
It's Benji.
Take the call, honey.
I'm not here. Just
[PHONE CONTINUES VIBRATING]
Hey.
["FALL" BY SG LEWIS PLAYING]
You've been guarded ♪
Yeah, it, it was weird
not talking all day.
We departed for some time ♪
I missed you, too.
You made your mind up ♪
Uh, I, I, I don't want to rush
back into things either but
No, yeah. I understand.
- All right. Bye.
- [PHONE BEEPS]
He doesn't want to go with me
to Harold and Veronica's wedding.
Yeah. He says, that, uh,
we need some more time
to figure stuff out.
I'm sorry, mijo.
But maybe a little more
time will be a good thing?
If you let me ♪
Maybe.
Took for granted ♪
Can we go home?
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Now you're fading, I need you more ♪
Can we fall ♪
All over again ♪
Can we fall ♪
All over again ♪
♪
VICTOR: Dear Simon,
I know it's been a minute
since I've reached out,
and you were probably thinking, "Wow!
I bet Victor finally
has his shit together."
But Simon, my shit is not together.
My shit is
Well, it's shit.
Benji wants to take a break from us.
We've been far from perfect lately,
but I thought we were strong
enough to get through anything.
And now, I'm not so sure.
So, I told off a priest.
Well, "telling off"
might be a bit strong.
Nobody had to hold my earrings,
but I did tell Father Lawrence
that we're quitting the church.
Cool.
And I found another
congregation in Five Points.
Their website says all are welcome,
which is Catholic for less homophobic.
Victor
- Is everything okay?
- Not really.
Well, is it something
you want to talk about?
No.
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
Ooh, yeah ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
Ooh, yeah ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
I ain't there yet but I'm healing ♪
If you're wondering how he
gets his hair that perfect,
there isn't a pomade in the
world that can do that for you.
Should we shave his head
in his sleep and make a wig?
We could share it.
Okay, that was funny. Are you okay?
Benji and I are taking a
break. It was his choice.
- What? Why?
- I don't know. A lot of things.
I mean, he wasn't too thrilled
that I told you that he was in AA.
- Oh, no! I, I didn't tell anyone, I swear.
- No, no, no.
I know, and it's, it's not your fault.
I shouldn't have told you.
But it's not just that. We've been
fighting about everything lately.
He says he needs some time to
figure out if we still make sense.
- [BELL RINGS]
- And now I just have to sit next to him in pre-calc
and pretend like I'm not dying inside.
How are you supposed
to learn complex math
while having gay relationship drama?
Yeah, high school is demented.
Hey, what do you say we get out of here?
What do you mean? Like, skip school?
Scandalous, I know, but it
kind of works out for me, too.
I have this test in third period,
and I did not finish Lord of the Flies.
Who knew a bunch of hot British
boys getting stranded on an island
- could be so boring?
- [VICTOR CHUCKLES]
You're right. Let's get out of here.
But let's be stealthy about it.
I don't want to get in trouble.
Then fix your face and
unclench your butt cheeks,
'cause you look like you
just murdered your family,
embezzled your inheritance,
and started over in Boca Raton.
I watch a lot of true crime.
Somebody to tell me
it'll be all right ♪
Somebody to tell me
it'll be just fine ♪
If someone has been there
before, say it right now ♪
'Cause I just need to hear it ♪
♪
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
Ah, not that way.
That's where Mrs. Potemkin
goes to chain smoke
and cry about her dead marriage.
I should teach a master
class on skipping school.
Although, I'd probably skip that, too.
So, wait, how do you not get in trouble?
Doesn't the school call your parents?
Nope. I just email the school office
saying it's some made up Muslim holiday.
None of those old ladies in admin
want to go down for
religious perse-cush.
Yeah, you see, I don't think "Muslim
holiday" is gonna work for me.
What are you doing?
[PHONE RINGS]
[IMITATING ISABEL]: Hi, this is
Victah Salazah's mothah, Isabel?
Why are you pretending to
be my mom and not my dad?
[NORMAL VOICE]: Um, I don't
know what your dad sounds like.
- Well, neither do they!
- Okay, well, it's too late to switch now.
- [PHONE BEEPS]
- Ah, yeah, sorry about that. Um,
look, Victah's not gonna
be able to come in today.
Yeah, he'd kill me for telling you this,
but he got into some bad
chimichangas last night,
and let's just say he got
it comin' out of both ends.
Yeah Aw, thank you so much.
Aw, that's so sweet. Adios!
[IN NORMAL VOICE]: She said to feel
better and to drink lots of fluids.
I hate you so much right now.
I never would have pegged you
as the "cutting class" type.
Hey. Don't judge a book by
it's extremely chic cover.
It's just sometimes I feel like
all these Creekwood kids are living
in their happy little bubbles,
and I'm not like any of them.
Sometimes I feel outside of it all.
And when that happens, I
need to get out from under
the tragic fluorescent
lighting and breathe.
But today's your day to breathe.
So, what do you want to do?
I don't know.
I can't stop thinking about Benji.
I mean, we were supposed to go to
Mia's dad's wedding this weekend,
- and now
- Okay, so we just have to get your mind off of Benji.
But everywhere reminds me of him.
Okay, then we'll go somewhere you
and Benji have never been before.
A Benji memory-free zone.
I know just the place.
- SERVER: Here you go. Enjoy.
- Thanks.
Okay, what am I eating, and why
haven't I had it before? [LAUGHS]
It's Tahchin. A crispy
rice cake, with chicken.
Anytime I'm in my feels,
I have to have that.
It kind of reminds me of
my mom's arroz con pollo.
She used to make it
every Sunday after church.
Used to?
Well, now that she and
my dad are separated
Oh, yeah. How are things
going with that, by the way?
I don't know. It's on the long list
of things that we don't talk about.
What about you? How are
things with your parents?
Actually
Remember when I told you
I didn't finish Lord
of the Flies last night?
It's 'cause I was
coming out to my parents.
What? Rahim! Why didn't
you tell me before?
I don't know. You were
so bummed about Benji,
and I didn't want to
make today about me.
So, how did you do it?
This is humiliating,
but I wrote everything I
wanted to say on a notecard,
because I knew once I took it
out, I wouldn't be able to bail.
And I didn't. I, I read it to them,
and they sat there for
what felt like six years,
and my, my dad said, "I'm really
happy you finally told us."
Wait. They were glad that
you "finally" told them?
Okay, so apparently,
my mom had discovered
my internet search
history when I was twelve,
and saw that I had been Googling
"Tom Holland" plus "penis."
VICTOR: No! [LAUGHS]
- Tom Holland?
- I know.
Anyway, thank you.
For helping me be brave.
No. Rahim, you did that all on your own.
I'm I'm really proud of you.
[PHONE CHIMES]
Is something going on?
No. Sorry.
Victor?
Dad?
Victor, why aren't you in school?
That, that would be
my fault, Mr. Salazar.
I had to miss school today for the
Muslim Festival of a
Thousand Pistachios.
Very sacred.
Uh, Victor had a free period,
and he was kind enough
to bring me my homework
so I wouldn't fall behind.
- I'm Rahim, by the way.
- Hi.
Oh, uh, sorry. Uh, Victor,
this is, uh, my friend Shelby.
So nice to meet you, Victor.
Your dad talks about you all the time.
He does? When?
PFLAG. Shelby and I, we know
each other from the meetings.
Uh, Victor, can we talk for a second?
Happy holidays. I just love pistachios.
[BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY]
- Are you on a date right now?
- Shelby and I
Yes, we're seeing each other.
It's very new. It's too new to
tell you about, but here we are.
- Does Mom know?
- She does.
So, that's it?
You guys are never getting back
together? You're just giving up on her?
Victor, I'm not giving up on anything.
- You're dating other people.
- You're not even trying anymore.
Look, I think that this is
a much bigger conversation.
And maybe me catching
you skipping school
is not the best time to have it.
Your friend over there,
he's pretty smooth,
but I wasn't born yesterday.
Are you gonna tell Mom?
If you head back to class now,
maybe I'll forget to mention it.
VICTOR: I can't believe
my dad got a girlfriend.
God. How could he do this to my mom?
- Can I ask you a personal question?
- Mmm.
Do you think your parents
should get back together?
Like, do you think that
they're right for each other?
I don't know. I mean, last year,
they were constantly fighting.
And sometimes I just wished they'd
get the hell away from each other
and give us all a break.
Before that
They were pretty magic together.
I mean, they were our age
when they started dating.
But maybe that's part of the
problem. You know, like
what are the odds that the first
person you date is the person
you're supposed to end up with?
Okay, I don't care what your dad
says. We're not going back to school.
It's time to turn the
self-care up to an eleven.
VICTOR: You know, I've never
actually had a pedicure before.
You're acting like this is
news, but those hooves are rough.
Linda, Michelle, the
number 4 special, please.
"Oh oh aubergine" for me,
and "clear" for my very
wild friend over here.
- Okay. [LAUGHS]
- [PHONE ALERTS]
Okay, why do you keep grinning
at your phone like that?
- Did Tom Holland slide into your DMs?
- No!
Okay? It's just this guy Charlie
I've been talking to
on one of those apps.
- You know which one.
- Well, let me see.
Wait. Are all these
headless torsos in Atlanta?
This is just guys nearby.
Turns out there's a ton of
gay fish in the online sea.
And all the fish claim to have 9-inch dicks.
Yeah, all the fish kind of lie.
Like when Charlie and I started talking,
we both said we were twenty-two.
But turns out he's a
senior at Thadwick Academy.
- Thadwick?
- Mm-hmm.
Damn. Your boyfriend's bougie.
He's not my boyfriend, okay?
We, we haven't even met.
We just text a lot.
And send the occasional
mildly scandalous pic.
You should ask him if
he wants to meet up.
What, like now?
You said I get to pick what we
do today, and this is what I pick.
I can't believe I'm
actually gonna do this.
I feel a pimple starting on my chin,
and this isn't even one
of my top-tier outfits.
Well, lucky for you, we're in a spa.
Linda, Michelle, give him the works.
I have $17 in my wallet.
- Give him $17 worth of works.
- There we go.
RAHIM: Okay, you sure
you don't mind being here?
No. Benji's not working today.
And plus, I know where
we keep the pepper spray
in case Charlie turns out to
be a sixty-year-old murderer
whose kink is decapitating high
school students with a box cutter.
Do you think you're the only
person that watches true crime?
[RAHIM CHUCKLES]
Oh, my God. I think that's him.
Okay, I would so let him decapitate me.
- Maybe don't start with that.
- Right.
Go.
Charlie. Hi-yee!
I don't know why I just said
"hi" like that. I'm nervous.
- It's fine. Nice to meet you.
- Yeah.
You look just like your pics, thank God.
A lot of people use
those ring light things
that make their pores disappear,
and they end up looking like
hideous monsters in real life,
but you don't. So, drop
that skincare routine, sis!
- Thanks. Thank you.
- [RAHIM CHUCKLES]
What's good here?
Ah, well, the chili mocha
latte is my personal obsesh.
She's serving spicy,
she's serving sweet.
You need her in your life.
"Her" as in the, the coffee?
Uh, why don't you order,
and I'll grab us a table?
Hey, um
Sorry. Uh
You're, you're just
different from how I pictured.
- What do you mean?
- No, I just Like the
The way you talk.
And like, the way you are.
Sorry, I
I tend to go for guys who
are a bit more masculine?
No offense.
Oh.
CHARLIE: Yeah. It's just my preference.
RAHIM: Yeah. No, if you're not
into it, you're not into it.
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR CLOSES]
I kind of wish he'd
decapitated me instead.
I'm so embarrassed.
I can't believe you just saw that.
No, he should be
embarrassed. What a dick.
No. I, I get it. If he's
into "masc" guys or whatever,
I'm never gonna be that.
I'm wearing lavender suede.
Okay, first off, that jacket
is fire, and you know it.
And secondly, don't let one stupid
boy ruin what's great about you.
Except it's not just one stupid boy.
You know, a lot of people see me
as just this funny, fruity beanpole,
- and nothing else.
- All right, that's bullshit.
You're tall, you're smart,
you're super handsome
Super handsome?
Stop. I'm just saying that objectively,
you're a very good looking guy.
Okay. Okay, this is the
content I signed up for.
Can you start an OnlyFans where
it's just you complimenting me?
Maybe in an ASMR whisper voice?
I'm trying to tell you something.
You're a catch, Rahim.
And, uh,
if we went to a gay bar,
you would totally clean up.
Well. I'm pretty sure you would
clean up at a gay bar, too.
If you were single. Which you're not.
Because things are gonna work
out between you and Benji.
Maybe. Or maybe not.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
It's just my mom.
Oh. Sorry.
You know what?
Why don't we go to a gay bar?
Really? I don't have,
like, an ID or anything.
So? I went to one in New York,
and they never even checked.
RAHIM: Ugh, no
Okay, we can do this.
Just act confident,
and try to make yourself look older,
like, like, beaten down by life.
Right.
- No. It's not gonna work.
- God, we're never gonna get in.
Screw it. Come on.
Remember this morning, when
you wouldn't even skip school?
Well, I guess you're a bad influence.
["PRIVATE LIFE" BY ALLIE X PLAYING]
Oh, I usually ♪
Wanna keep what's mine ♪
In my private life ♪
But I could let your eyes ♪
Take a peek inside ♪
In my private life ♪
VICTOR: Rahim?
Sorry. This is amazing.
I think if you keep
staring, you gotta tip him.
No, I, I mean all of this.
Everyone's
This is the first time in
my life where I feel like
I know.
Just give him a dollar.
All I know is when
you talk like that ♪
When you talk like
that, I don't get tired ♪
Your proximity to me
has got me up and wired ♪
Thought I was high ♪
VICTOR: Go.
Keep it going ♪
Dance till I ♪
Lose my mind ♪
In my private life ♪
Keep it going, keep it going ♪
Dance till I ♪
Lose my mind ♪
In my private life ♪
Keep it going ♪
You are so full of shit!
Your number one hottest thing
about a guy is his brain?
Yes! Like if a guy hits me up
and he says, "You're handsome,"
but spells it Y-O-U-R?
- Immediate block.
- [VICTOR SNICKERS]
Okay, so number one is smart.
- You big liar. Then what?
- Then
- A great smile.
- Um
Symmetrical eyebrows.
I wouldn't be mad at a cute hockey butt.
So, you're into athletes.
Their bodies, yes.
- Their personalities, not so much.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
What about you? What's your type?
Uh, Benji?
RAHIM: Your type is Benji?
Well, he was the first
guy that I ever kissed,
the first guy that I ever dated
I, I wasn't even sure I
was gay until I met him.
I mean, did I have a recurring dream
where Charlie Puth and I were
trapped in a jail cell? Sure.
Been there, dreamed that. [CHUCKLES]
But Benji was the only real life guy
that I ever considered going for.
Then you went for it.
And he went for you back.
That's more than a lot of us can say.
Listen, that guy at
Brasstown was a total asshole.
Yes, he was, but
What I meant was
I've never had what you and Benji have.
- I've never even kissed a guy before.
- Oh.
You will.
- [TAPPING ON MIC, MIC SQUEALS]
- DJ: Hey, it's karaoke time!
The first one of the
night is Victor and Rahim!
- What did you do?
- [LIGHT APPLAUSE]
Sorry, not sorry. Come on.
[CHEERING AND CLAPPING]
I hear a lot about sinners ♪
Don't think that I'll be a saint ♪
But I might go down to the river ♪
'Cause the way that the
sky opens up when we touch ♪
- Yeah, it's makin' me say ♪
- Okay
That the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
BOTH: Feels so holy,
holy, holy, holy, holy ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
'Cause the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so holy ♪
BOTH: They say we're too young and ♪
The pimps and the players
say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪
Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪
- But I don't know ♪
- Ah-ah, ah, ah ♪
They say we're too young and ♪
The pimps and the players
say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪
Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪
But I don't know ♪
The way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so holy, holy,
holy, holy, holy ♪
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
BOTH: On God, runnin' to
the altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
On God, runnin' to the
altar like a track star ♪
Can't wait another second ♪
'Cause the way you hold me, hold
me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪
Feels so ho-o-o-oly ♪
[CLAPPING AND CHEERING]
ISABEL: Victor Salazar!
- Oh, shit
- [PATRON WHISTLES]
We are so sorry, Mrs. Salazar.
But can I just say, vermilion
is totally your color.
How did you even find us?
A very worried woman
called me from your school,
asking if you were feeling any better
from the poisoned
chimichangas that I served you!
We're not even Mexican!
And then I used my motherly
instincts to track you down.
Your brother showed me
how to do "find my iPhone."
Rahim, can you give us a minute, please?
You're playing hooky
now? Hanging out at bars?
- When I tell Papi about this
- He knows already.
About the skipping school part, anyways.
We bumped into him at lunch,
and he was with some
woman that he's seeing.
Oh.
Yeah, so much for you and Dad being
the loves of each other's lives.
So, is this why you're acting out?
- Are you upset about me and Papi?
- No! I mean
I mean, maybe that's part of it, but
I think Benji's breaking up with me.
What? When did that happen?
Last night. We got into a huge
fight, and now he's not talking to me.
Mijo. Why didn't you
tell me about Benji?
Because I thought you might be happy.
Happy?
Victor
I need you to hear this.
Your happiness is my happiness.
If your heart is broken, so is mine.
And I know you said that
Papi is the love of my life.
That's only sort of true.
You kids are the love of my life.
There is nothing in this world
that is more precious to me.
And I know
that I didn't make you
feel that way this year.
I'll never forgive
myself for that, but
I accept you, Victor.
I, I love every single part of you.
And I will spend the rest of my life
to make sure that you know that. Okay?
And if things with
Benji are really over,
I know you'll find
another wonderful person.
I Not "person."
Another young man, who
is just right for you.
♪
Why do I keep having these life changing
moments outside of gay bars? [LAUGHS]
What?
How many gay bars have you been to?
I said "outside of gay bars."
Victor!
Super cool of your mom to
give me a ride, by the way.
I don't smell like alcohol, do I?
My mom doesn't even keep
mouthwash in the house,
'cause it's a slippery slope.
You smell normal.
Uh, hey
Um, I just wanted to, uh
thank you for cutting with me today.
- I had a lot of fun.
- Me, too.
- Best fake Muslim holiday ever.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE]
I should probably go inside
and finish Lord of the Flies.
Here's hoping they get rescued.
Or at least find some soap.
[BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY]
Goodnight, Rahim.
Goodnight.
♪
VICTOR: Hey.
[PHONE VIBRATES]
It's Benji.
Take the call, honey.
I'm not here. Just
[PHONE CONTINUES VIBRATING]
Hey.
["FALL" BY SG LEWIS PLAYING]
You've been guarded ♪
Yeah, it, it was weird
not talking all day.
We departed for some time ♪
I missed you, too.
You made your mind up ♪
Uh, I, I, I don't want to rush
back into things either but
No, yeah. I understand.
- All right. Bye.
- [PHONE BEEPS]
He doesn't want to go with me
to Harold and Veronica's wedding.
Yeah. He says, that, uh,
we need some more time
to figure stuff out.
I'm sorry, mijo.
But maybe a little more
time will be a good thing?
If you let me ♪
Maybe.
Took for granted ♪
Can we go home?
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
Now you're fading, I need you more ♪
Can we fall ♪
All over again ♪
Can we fall ♪
All over again ♪