Creeped Out (2017) s02e10 Episode Script

The Unfortunate Five

The Curious.
They say he collects strange tales.
And if you ever hear his whistle, you know something creepy is about to unfold.
Have you ever lost your temper? Where does it go once you've lost it? Does it evaporate? Or does it float around, waiting to be found? What if there was someone, or something, who went looking to find it? Come on.
Oh Move aside.
No way.
What are you doing here? Got nothing to say? All right.
We have to be at Uncle Larry's birthday party by 6:00, because that is when the rodeo clown - is gonna be performing.
- Okay.
You don't have to come all the way in, you know.
Make sure you stick to the sandwiches that I made for you.
You know you get gassy from the school cheese.
- Willow! - Okay, um, I'm here.
You can go now.
- It's so nice to see you! - Hi, Ms.
Hall.
Uh, sorry Tina.
Oh, it's been too long since I've seen you! You're not here for detention, are you? - That's not like you.
- Mom! That's plenty.
Please go.
Be good.
- Bye.
- Yeah, bye.
What a mama's girl you are.
Say cheese! This was perfect.
Kinda eerie on the weekends, huh? Boom! Look alive, Unfortunate Five! Yeah, that's your name now "The Unfortunate Five.
" Believe me, it was the kindest of all the possibilities.
- Okay, what is that? - Uh, my hoverboard, sir.
- Get it off of your feet.
- Sorry.
- Put it on the bench.
- Yeah.
Okay, now I'd like you to put your phones into this bag, please.
I need to draw you a map? Put your phones in the bag, please.
That's it, that's it.
There you go, there you go.
Great.
As you know, this is your third strike.
So that means excuse me! Where you going? Well, if it's strike three, that means we're out.
So can we go? Ha! Ha, ha! That's funny, eh? Okay, Chuckles, you just bought yourself a spot here next week as well.
Wow.
Devastated.
- You wanna go for another one? - Jude, quit it.
Stop.
- Thank you.
- Mmm.
Okay, now everyone dump your bags and empty your pockets onto this bench.
And then follow me, Unfortunate Five, I have a little surprise for you.
On the bench now.
Oh, Jude, let me know if you're gonna eat any school cheese so that I can get upwind.
And that's goin' on my channel! Oh, wow, the Channel Feng! Prepare to be super famous, Mayel.
Ooh, salty slam! And that's why you've never been invited to any of my legendary parties.
Personally, I think boredom is the perfect punishment for a misfit's mind.
But these days, instead of rotting the brain, they prefer to open your mind, so This is Ms.
Kalli, of the "Empathy Project.
" Please, call me Faye.
Hi, Faye! I will be guiding you through a day of yoga, unblocking, mindfulness, and meditation or as I like to call it, "YUMM.
" She's not serious.
Oh, she is.
YUMM is my sure-fire system to help cure a school of its negative energy.
Yumm-yumm, kids! Enjoy! - Thank you, Mr.
Hawkins.
- Thank you, Faye.
Well, then, shall we begin? I like to start things out with a truth circle.
This is a little technique I used when Beckerman High brought me in to help.
Not cool to say their names here.
I mean, they're kinda like our rivals.
Not that they're much competition since their star player disappeared.
Ah, Rob Dorsett.
Rob Dorsett.
Yeah, he gave me one of my most shared uploads.
Yeah, watch this.
See? - Yeah.
- And then he throws the table.
A little insensitive while the boy's missing, don't you think? - What? - I can smell your brain rotting from here.
They've found some bones near Beckerman.
- Might be human.
- They think it's Rob? Oh, please.
You're more gullible than you look.
I remember Rob well.
He was a really tortured soul.
One of those rare soups.
Simply brimming with fear, anger, hatred Now, everyone join hands.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, so much negativity coursing through you all.
Good.
Now let it out.
This is a safe space.
You have a hard time taking things seriously, don't you, Stan? I kinda think blowing up the science lab is pretty serious.
That was you? I had to re-do my whole assignment thanks to you.
How do you know so much about us? I like to do my research before I come to a new school.
Hey, who cares, all right? We got out early, and I got some great footage because of it.
You use your channel like a weapon, don't you, Feng? Well you know, I like the truth to get out there.
Like that post about Mayel cozying up to her best friend Quinn's brother? You're the reason Quinn isn't talking to me? Technically you're the reason.
I mean, it was true, I was Bitter you weren't invited to Mayel's party? - Hey, shut up.
- No, you shut up! You got me benched! Quinn's my captain, genius! Well, "genius," - how about you stay away from her brother? - Oh! Good, good.
Let it out.
It's better out than in.
Really? Well, you can stay away from every party that I throw from here on out until - Infinity? - Shut up! Okay, everyone, let's break here.
Let's take five to refresh and reflect.
I'll be back, and we'll move on to our next exercise.
Hello? Little piggy? Let me in.
Hmm.
You interrupted my wife's meatball sandwich for this? Look, I know it sounds crazy, but I saw her, okay? I heard her.
Like, she was smelling me.
"Smelling" you? Look, if this is some kind of ploy, you got a better shot at getting straight A's than you do of getting out of here today.
I'm not trying to get out of this.
I just you can't leave us in there, okay? Not with that whatever she is! It's your job to protect us.
No, no, it's my job to protect the students who might actually have a future.
Then the rest of them I just bury.
You know, those those ones that are lacking a future.
The losers! You know, don't you ever get tired of being so tiring? I remember when your parents got divorced Don't talk about that.
Are you gonna help me or not? There is no helping people like you.
You're a waste of help.
Oh don't even think about trying to leave.
Ah, just in time.
We're about to start phase two.
Where have you been? I saw you.
- When? - The washroom.
I saw you.
You saw me do what? What whatever you were doing.
You were spying on me in the washroom? I'm not sure Mr.
Hawkins is gonna like to hear that.
I'm not sure he'd like to hear about what you were doing, either.
So why don't you tell him? Ah, you already did.
How did that go? Nobody trusts a girl who's always in trouble.
That must be hard on the parents.
Tsk.
- Kinda the last straw for your mom, too - Don't talk about my mom.
Oh, and you see it.
- You see her giving up on you.
- Shut up.
- Your own mother writing you off.
- Stop talking about my mom! Oh, that's good.
You're coming along nicely.
We really should be getting back to the others.
That's that's Rob Dorsett's! Why do you have it? Rob was my last great "case.
" So full of delicious complexities fear, anger, hatred.
It was perfect.
- You remind me of him.
- What did you do to him? Everything I could, to get those feelings out.
And after I could do no more, well tsk.
You know, it's not easy, finding someone like that.
So I've been looking for his replacement.
Searching for the most delicious choice.
Perhaps the Unfortunate Five is where my search will end.
- What's going on here? - What are you doing? - What's this? - Okay, listen, I'm trying to read - and you're just being so annoying! - Everyone back to the circle, please.
- I'm vlogging.
- You can't take my spot.
"Take my spot"? You know, all you - You okay? - How can you not understand? I can't believe you're so immature! - Hey, hey, hey! - You literally just - It's the anger.
- What? She feeds on people.
The angry ones.
What are you talking about? Give it to me! Why are you so stubborn and narcissistic? So are you! Where is my chakra crystal? Where were you? Why don't you post some lies about where you think she was? How about you sucker-punch me like you did to that defender last game? Oh, come closer and I will.
Stop it! You're doing exactly what she wants.
This lady is she's some kind of demon or succubus.
Okay, yeah, keep the freaky fantasies to yourself and your lame video game, yeah? But this is happening, okay? This is real.
- Maybe we should believe her? - Check out the lap dog over here.
Everyone needs to stop with the hate and anger.
It's exactly what she wants.
Okay! This seems to be going well.
So let's move on to our mindfulness exercise.
You'll be in pairs, so one of you will wear a blindfold and the other will be their guide.
Why do we need to do any more of your exercises? Why do we need to get rid of our anger? We get angry because we care.
Because we get ripped off.
Because we're ignored and and misunderstood.
Why is that so bad? Mayel, you're the fiercest player on the soccer team.
You couldn't play the way you do without the fire you've got.
- Right? - Uh, yeah.
I guess the last game you designed was pretty good, too.
Yeah, I loved Old Boot Hands.
And no way I could come up with an idea like that if I just did what I was told by, by people like her! You're suddenly so full of compliments, Jude.
Do you have something nice to say for Willow? She is your oldest friend here, right? Why aren't you two close anymore? What do you think, Willow? You've been so quiet all day.
She doesn't like being put on the spot.
Leave her alone.
Didn't Jude just stop hanging out with you for no apparent reason? That must've been hard.
- It was.
- Did you feel abandoned by her? You can't help it if your brain works differently, right? - Stop it.
Willow, don't answer her.
- But I can't help it.
And you weren't given this detention, were you? You asked to come in today.
Why would someone choose to do something like that? - Was it to get closer to Jude? - Leave her alone.
Stop embarrassing her.
Let it out, Willow.
I know it's really hard to be ditched by a good friend.
- Stop it! I didn't! - But you did! You just stopped being my friend just like everyone else! No one wants to hang out with "Weird Willow!" I stopped hanging out with everyone! Did you notice that? And you know why, right? 'Cause I'm a weirdo! You may as well say it! Everyone else does.
- And they're right! - Willow, no.
I was going through my own stuff.
My mom and dad Oh, good excuse to move away from the oddball, though, right? No one can get mad at you for that.
Except I did! - Willow, stop.
- I don't know how to be - like everyone else, and I hate it! - Self-hate.
My favorite flavor.
I hate them for it! I hate it all! Everyone, let's take a break.
Willow and I need to work through some things.
Let's go.
I believe you.
- She's choosing Willow.
- Right, so what do we need? Holy water, silver bullets, wooden stake? If we can't stop her, then let's prepare her a real feast.
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy Feng, Mayel, I'm out of here.
Who's with me? - Mmm - Uh, Stanny boy, of all people, you wanna break out of here? How? The school's in lockdown.
I jimmied the window.
Nice! - He actually did it.
- Fine.
Ms.
Faye, Ms.
Faye! They're trying to escape! You better deal, or Hawkins will be in here like a SWAT team in a second! Stan, what are you doing, man? I caught them trying to go out the window.
Hey, you two, where do you think you're going? Don't come in.
Oh, no, no way.
Not again.
Look, just take that stupid smile outside now.
Or would you like to double down on this detention? You do know your "threats" are starting to get really boring, right? They're not threats.
They're facts.
Mmm.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh, like that.
I could have you removed from here, permanently.
Sure, "Thanos.
" Real scared.
What, you think I'm bluffing? You're not gonna be smiling when your mommy has to go find you a new school and you have to start the grade all over again and be marked a "loser for life.
" - What is your problem? - You.
You are my problem.
I own this school, and I own you.
Stop smiling.
May I? What? Oh Oh Way too much sauce, Mrs.
H.
I mean, who'd even? That's gross.
That is it.
And now you are expelled from these premises, and you will never set foot here again.
Whew And not only that.
I'm gonna make sure that no other school will touch you, either.
You know what? I've spent three decades and two marriages surrounded by brats like you, and for what? To be mocked in my office? In my own school? Well, you can bet are you even listening to me? Oh.
Sorry, you talking to me? I said stop smiling.
What? What's this? Ugh, they convinced me.
What? What, hey, where are you no, no, I'm not done.
Yeah, you are.
Bitterness, resentment you are marinated to perfection.
Okay, okay, okay, what is happening here? Easy, easy.
Okay.
You can have the desk.
Hey, hey Okay, okay, easy.
What, what? Yeah, that's mine.
Thanks.
No one mention this to anyone.
Agreed? I wouldn't know what to say if I did.
They say that when you get angry, you should count to ten.
But count quickly, because anger-feeders can reach you in five.

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