Foursome (2016) s02e10 Episode Script

1 (light music) [Andie.]
Previously on Foursome, the home queries were epic, Clemont asked me to homecoming and he left this beret in my locker.
Yes, Mae.
[Andie.]
Some were more impressive than others.
Oh, surprised it's not a Polaroid though.
[Andie.]
And I've made a big decision.
What's next for Andie everything but Fixler? I'm thinking I'm ready for the but.
And it couldn't have come at a better time.
Yes! As long as I can keep Alec distracted.
How 'bout this, we all go together? [Andie.]
One thing's clear, everyone is psyched for homecoming.
You all have had quite the night, haven't you? Thank you, Steven, for bringing the dark to light.
We can do this the easy way, or the hard way.
The choice is entirely up to you.
I see.
Well, tight lips don't just sink ships, they ensure expulsion.
What, ah, did she say that? Phones on the desk.
Let's see what you've been hiding.
Come on guys, no, you're just making it worse.
Steven! Get a hold of yourself.
I will get to the bottom of tonight.
You may not wanna talk, but I know you millenials.
Tonight, without a doubt, is well-documented on all of your cellular devices.
And if it's the last thing I do in my educating career, I will get to the bottom of tonight.
What's on your phones? (suspenseful music) Smile, honey.
You're on the most handsome arm in the city.
Ugh, not much competition.
Let's leave this mess, I take way better pictures than these jokers anyway.
We're like a black and white filter.
Come on white bread, let's boogie.
Coming in hot! (yelling and grunting) I guess we could like, crop him out or something.
Yeah, he's in the middle so we could just cut him out and then put the photo back together.
(laughs) I'll go grab our tickets, okay? Hey.
Hi.
You look amazing.
Thanks.
You clean up nice.
Kent's a lucky guy.
I always wanted to be the one to take you to your first dance.
Ready? Yeah.
Hey Josh.
Josh, hi.
Here is your corsage.
You look really you tonight.
Thank you so much for being my date.
I can't believe Clemont got deported.
Really? I felt like we all saw that coming.
Ooh, we're next, come on.
Are you sad you're gonna have to crown a new queen tonight? You know what, no.
I actually feel ready to hang my crown up.
I just wish I didn't have so many duties with Alec, you know? Tighter.
Can't wait for later.
Do you feel different? You look different.
Courtney, we haven't even had sex yet.
Yeah, but you decided to.
That's almost the same.
Deciding to have sex is the same as having sex? That can't be right, my mom says sex is just your gender.
Wow, your dad must be one depressed dude.
He cries a lot.
You know, I do feel different.
I feel ready.
Kent just makes me feel so comfortable.
Plus, he makes my basement flood.
Quick reminder, it hurts.
Your basement's gonna need re-carpeting.
I know, but I think it's worth it.
You know, I may be a 90's cliche by losing my V on HC but honestly guys, it's a stereotype for a reason.
I mean, this dress, the night, having you guys by my side.
Not to mention how badass it felt paying cash for a motel.
They'll rent a room to a bleeding hobo.
I wouldn't brag about it.
Okay, I'm just saying it feels like the perfect night.
It does, doesn't it? I can't believe it's already the end of the semester.
It's funny because after homecoming, I will be coming home.
(laughs) Tonight is the perfect night to say goodbye to public school.
To your virginity, to your crown, and your Go on.
Judgemental demeanor.
Your dress could hide Tom Cruise's secrets.
Guess not.
How about, this is the last night you give two hoots about Zapp? After this, you're your own man.
You spin poetry.
Well snap, snap, damn that was beautiful.
(laughing) Shall we commemorate? [Courtney.]
Yeah.
Ayo Brayer buds, it's me, your reigning king, A.
Fixler, haha.
Don't you fret about this crown moving a muscle, 'cause no doubt, no diggity, Imma win twice.
Haha! Yo, Bobcats, you ready to serve under the best king in the West? (cheering) (beep) off.
Your face ruined my shot.
Well, dating you brought down my average.
Oh, you know a lot about average, don't you, Court? Ugh, I can't believe I'm stuck here beside you all night.
The minute I crown the next Queen, consider me vapor.
Already considered.
Your majesties.
'Tis bickering I hear? So, as previous king and queen, you're supposed to set the majestic mood.
So, cheer up, wave proudly, and then you know, pass the torch.
Can't come soon enough.
Never your problem.
She's joking.
(laughing) Now I have forever proof that you are the worst dancer ever.
Yeah, well, you dance like a dad.
Yeah, well, you like it because it gives me an excuse for me to put my hands here.
You like where your hands are now? Just wait until after the dance.
I don't think I can wait.
(air horn) (laughing) (air horn) (air horn) Wow, this DJ hates us.
Yeah, maybe we should just take a break and grab some punch? Dakota spiked it.
Yes.
I am feeling this beat.
Right, Joshie? Uh, yeah.
You think I can't figure out your passcodes, "6969.
" I will crack you.
I mean, look, hey, I'm on your side.
You guys have each others' backs and are real cool with each other and I get that.
You know? I get you, I'm in on it.
Me as well.
No, Steven.
Steven, no.
Hey, bros.
Look at me, I'm just one of the guys.
I used to fart around with my friends, go silly.
That's what best buds do, right? So let's just do ourselves a favor and unlock these phones.
Unlock 'em.
I need more than a teenage girl's tattling in order to punish these kids.
I need hard evidence.
So maybe don't punish them.
What's on your phones? Oh my God, you have to get that guy over there, looks like he's giving her the Heimlich.
(choking) Ew.
It's okay, it's just an extension I can take it out.
Ow (fabric ripping) I'll get it.
" Get low, make it hot " I'm really gonna miss this place.
Look, this is where I first dropped my backpack.
And this is where I hid when I thought there was a lockdown, but it turns out someone just coughed.
And this is my locker.
Freeze! Was this picture taken tonight? Yeah, I wanted to remember my first public school locker.
Give me that.
Oh my God.
Mr.
Zapp.
He's here.
Tonight! Dakota, I wouldn't and he's getting arrested.
Voting is closed.
Oh, Courtney, I haven't voted yet.
Sorry, Imogen.
Just trying to get this over with as soon as possible.
Ditto, that way I can find out I won and get naked.
Oh my God (laughs) that's right.
We totally started that tradition, skinny dipping in the pool after winning.
Yo, I threw you so hard that you almost missed the pool.
(laughs) You were light because you threw up - jello shots.
- Jello shots! Hey, thanks for holding my hair back.
Yeah, sure thing, babe.
Courtney.
Courtney.
You know, ralph or not, I could probably still throw you the distance.
(Courtney screams) I'm not wearing any underwear.
We should probably turn these Yeah, we should probably turn them in.
Okay, see ya.
Okay, definitely feel like I could have voted in that amount of time.
Our last dance as Homecoming King and Queen, how do you feel? Ready.
Okay.
It's just weird and shit, cause it feels like our last dance like, ever.
Yeah, does feel weird.
It also doesn't, you know? You feel comfortable to me.
You also, as well.
Our relationship deserved a better ending than what we gave it.
True.
Our relationship was golden.
We won everything at this school, Homecoming, Mr.
and Mrs.
BHS, (laughs) Most Likely to Make a Life-Altering Mistake Together.
We ruled this joint.
We did, didn't we? Maybe that's why I like being here so much.
You made high school so much fun for me.
Alec, no.
I just realized something.
All of our best moments are in the past.
Maybe that's why we broke up.
I mean, we're in new places now.
And I am so excited to make new memories with you.
But as friends.
Cool, bro.
Yeah? Yeah.
Sweet.
[Alec.]
Ah yeah.
[Courtney.]
See ya.
Deuces.
Hi.
(gasps) Aren't you worried the ceiling is gonna like randomly collapse and kill us? It would honestly make sense with the way tonight's been going.
I'm not worried about anything right now.
Look I know that tonight didn't really go the way that you'd hoped, but I had a really good night 'cause I was with you.
Wanna get outta here? Downer's Motel? I'm thinking you can maybe do something to turn this night around.
What happened to you wanting everything to be perfect? Nothing in my life has ever been perfect.
But this feels right.
You make everything feel right and I want you to be my first.
And then I wanna go get a pizza.
(both laughing) - Mmm.
- Mmm.
Now's our chance.
[Greer.]
Where do you think you're going? I just need to You better think long and hard about your next move, Josh.
I know everything.
What are you talking about? Don't play dumb.
I saw you at that BDX party.
I saw you rip that sophomore slut out of that college dude's arms and disappear with her outside.
And now you're running after her again? No.
You're not gonna do this to me twice.
I'm sorry, Greer, I gotta go.
Wait, Josh.
Why does it always have to be her? It's always been her.
(cheering) Yeah! Loyal subjects and shit.
It's that time to pass the crown back down to me.
Haha! (applause) Art thee excited to serveth under a new regime? (forced laughter) Okay, we'll just cut right to it, then.
Courtney, please announce Brayer High School's next Homecoming Queen.
The next Queen is Oh my God, Imogen! (yelling excitedly) (crowd gasps) (triumphant music) What? (applause) This reminds me of a time that a senior, one day, told me that it was Appreciate Other Culture Day and I wore blackface.
Okay, let's not finish that story.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have been pranked so many times at this school, a thousand times, probably, at this school and I can tell that this isn't one of them.
I think.
No.
No, it's not.
'Cause, I can feel it.
Thank you for making me feel at home at school.
It makes it really hard for me to tell you that I'm going back to homeschool.
Public school's been this amazing adventure and I'm so happy that I got to experience it with all of you.
I finally feel accepted here but, oh my goodness, at the end of the day, I just wanna go home.
That's how I know it's the right decision.
You've all taught me to stay true to who I am.
And deep down, who I am is a homeschool girl! (applause) Air conditioner, lamp, Kent Saydak.
(bed groaning) (laughing) Are you ready to find out who your new King is? [Crowd.]
Yeah.
I don't even need to read the ballot.
I already know it's gonna be me.
No, no, you do need to read the ballot.
Fine! Brayer's new Homecoming King is Alec Kent Saydak.
Kent Saydak? You know what? If anyone was gonna take my crown as reigning King of this stink hole, I'm proud it's my best buddy.
Kent Saydak, get up here, broseph.
Kent? Quit dicking around, man, get up here.
Does anybody have eyes on Kent Saydak? He kinda talks like this.
He's Australian, or English, I don't know.
Does anybody know who his date is? Where's my sister? (crowd screaming) Andie! Move! Alec, Wait! Outta my way! Andie! (suspenseful music) Where did you find this? In my boyfriend's locker.
Josh? Donner's Motel.
Hurry, hurry.
Imogen, congrats on Homecoming Queen, you're finally one of us.
I don't wanna be anything like you.
Ken Saydak? Is anybody listening to me? Courtney? Ow, my ankle, it's twisted.
Damn hooker heels.
It's okay, I got you.
(grunting) Whoa, you're so strong.
I drink a lot of milk.
Okay, where we going? Dakota.
Okay, uh, no time for pants, Andie needs us.
Yeah, I'm kinda busy.
Alec called called Kent's name at Homecoming for the Homecoming King, but he wasn't there so Alec figured it out and then Greer gave Alec a picture of Andie in her underwear, and then Alec Alec's on his way to the motel.
Yeah.
Let's go get our girl.
(phone buzzing) (knocking) (suspenseful music) (knocking) Am I too late? Alec! Oh my God, are you okay? I'm gonna kill you! Hey, big brother.
Oh God my dick, ow! My hero.
Are you okay? You bitches took the limo.
Courtney, what happened? She twisted her ankle and we dropped her a few times on the run over.
Did you win homecoming queen? Yes.
(laughing) I need a doctor.
Greer? Long story.
All of you, back to Brayer, now! Since none of you are talking, let's discuss what I already know thanks to a certain student.
Drinking, fighting, being off campus during a school sponsored event.
You all signed a Code of Conduct and you have left me with no choice.
Mr.
Shaw, seeing you off campus at a motel is more than enough for me to have you three suspended from football.
And you three, from Media Club.
I've never heard of that.
(gasping) Steven, do you need to excuse yourself? I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Courtney Todd, you do not attend this school, and as such, you are banned from all Brayer High School events and property.
You are free to go.
I'm not going anywhere.
Adorable.
Thank you.
You're dead, both of you.
Hey, Alec Fixler.
This is your fourth violent infraction this semester.
Some would say, "For sure that kid's on 'roids.
" I'm gonna see to it, personally, that you get home.
Let's go, Papa Smurf.
Put this on.
Let's go.
Hey.
You okay? Yeah, are you? I'm stuck in the principal's office and I just got banned from playing football but I can't stop smiling.
Tonight was definitely memorable.
You can go ahead, I'll catch a ride with Court.
Okay.
That just killed you, didn't it, Josh? You know what? It did.
Well, at least I went out with a bang.
(laughing) So did Mr.
Zapp.
What? Golden Goose bagged! Dakota.
So are my feelings for Alec.
[Group.]
Aw.
Court.
I love you guys.
I'm gonna miss this so much.
I just don't know what we're gonna talk about anymore since I'm not gonna die a virgin.
(cheering) Court, you were right, I do feel different.
Yeah? Different good or bad? Good, I think.
But there's something else.
When Josh showed up, he asked me if he was too late.
[Group.]
Is he? Yes.
Maybe.
I don't know but can I count on you guys to help me figure it out? - Yes.
- You don't have to even ask.
Of course, Andie.
[Court.]
I love you guys.
Just so beautiful.
(bangs head) Thank God for locked phones.
Nobody should see what's on this bad boy.
Ditto.
(laughing) [Andie.]
Woo! (instrumental rock song)