Future Man (2017) s02e10 Episode Script
Exes and OS
1 [lightning crackling.]
GIRL: Previously on "Future Man" Tiger, meet Ty-Anne, my daughter.
I have one question and just one question only.
Robot or clone? Tell Dad I'm not coming out.
Can't he just, like, walk through the door? We made a deal that we would take my room off the grid so that I could become a woman in private.
Welcome back, Torque.
- How long was I gone? - Two years.
WOLF: I am not the man you think I am.
- LATHE: You're not Torque? - WOLF: Correct.
Do you know where the real Torque is? No.
Oh.
- You wanna live or die? - Uh, live.
- Then you better come with me.
- Who are you? I'm Achilles.
[playful music.]
STU: Oh, yeah, Ty-Anne.
Look at you.
[gasps.]
I'm so proud of you, Ty-Anne.
Come here.
Come here.
Yeah, that's right.
Oh, you're doing so well.
Come here.
TY-ANNE: Let me tell you something about having a computer for a dad.
Oh, yeah, come look oh.
[cries.]
TY-ANNE: It'll fuck you right up.
Kids can't be solved and computers don't like that.
Tie it around the loop.
But I know how much you like diagrams.
- TY-ANNE: I don't.
- So Okay, remember how I told you about the bunny that loves to live in the burrow that's right by the top quarter of your shoe? They hop around and they go into burrows and make knots behind with their tail? I appreciate the effort.
The effort's great, but we're looking for results here.
TY-ANNE: It was like this for everything.
No, not not like that.
[sighs.]
It's just a knot.
TY-ANNE: But I learned to adapt Kind of.
That's such a great hole, honey.
Very creative.
Uh, okay, um, Daddy is gonna be real busy bringing about a unified and lasting world peace, so Dr.
Hogeveen is here to help.
Don't need help.
You can't make me hang out with another ghost-lady! You're solid? That's right, chickadee.
TY-ANNE: And that was the first human I ever met.
We never really did the whole catch thing.
Oh, well, then, that's where we'll start.
Ah.
TY-ANNE: She was the stern governess I didn't know I needed, one who wouldn't let me get away with, well [soft laugh.]
Anything.
[low whistle.]
TY-ANNE: Dr.
Hogeveen taught me that instead of throwing things, I could use words.
Turns out, I was pretty good at it.
So, as you can see, these columns are identical, which is problematic, because you'd think that when a war ended, a person would be allowed to go to a party, but as you can see, a person is not.
[whispers.]
I'm a person.
[laughs softly.]
Wow, honey.
That is such lovely work.
Lovely work [chuckles.]
God, I really like those captivating dissolves too.
Well done.
Yeah.
But I'm afraid you're gonna have to sit this one out.
[hologram whooshes.]
[sighs.]
Listen, when I was your age, I didn't go to parties at any age, really.
I never got invited, and was I upset about that? Yeah, of course, but I got over it, and now, look at me.
I'm immortal, and they're all dead.
So, uh, how about a compromise? [hologram chirping.]
He didn't even look at the whole thing.
I formatted the bibliography in MLA because he's always saying APA's for hacks and journos.
TY-ANNE: Dr.
Hogeveen had no tolerance for tantrums.
To her, emotions were for the weak, but that night, she just let me go.
I can't live in this prison anymore.
He's literally a monster! TY-ANNE: Then dropped a 40 megaton truth-bomb in the heart of my childhood.
You're right.
He is a monster literally.
It's time you learn the truth about Stuart Gavin Camillo.
[dramatic music.]
STU: Adult male, 179 pounds.
I'll tell you anything.
Anything.
[gasps.]
[shuddering.]
[monotone beep.]
Upload failed.
[weak grunt.]
[monotone beep.]
Super-heated hemoglobin trial, fail.
Super-frozen hemoglobin trial, fail.
Polypeptic anti-coagulant phosphate neuro-depressor.
Fail.
I'm so stupid! Why did I think that would work? Fuck! Fuck! Wow, I can't believe I qualified for the test trial.
Since the war ended, my nightmares have just gotten worse.
I didn't even know that "dream relief" was a thing.
[chuckles.]
It is.
Now, just relax.
You're gonna feel a little pinch.
[mellow elevator music.]
- [machine whirrs.]
- [exhales.]
- [alert blares.]
- WOMAN: Hello? What is this place? It's cold, like my nightmares.
Where's my body? Your death will not be for nothing.
- WOMAN: My deat - [machine whirrs down.]
[exhales.]
[laughs softly.]
Well, it took 4,891 eggs to make this omelet [laughs.]
The subject must always enter the system willingly.
It's always the most obvious thing.
[maniacal laugh.]
TY-ANNE: Even though I kind of got it after seven murders, Dr.
Hogeveen insisted on showing me all 4,891.
[sighs.]
She was thorough that way.
She walked me through my father's plan to enslave us all.
Stu sees humanity as a problem.
This is his solution, his final answer to the problem.
So, we tell everyone.
We don't go.
Anyone who refuses to go to Mars gets killed by this.
Okay, it's scary, but we can kill one robot.
He has 12 million of these.
Sorry.
Probably should have mentioned that.
He'll release these on the day of the launch to eliminate any resistance, guard his servers, and make sure evolution doesn't get any ideas to challenge him ever again.
We have to stop him.
Tell me what to do.
Once Stu completes his upload centers, he'll say we're ready to go to M.
A.
R.
S.
- You have to say no.
- Why? - What will that do? - Stu needs you.
He feels a connection to you more powerful than anything else in his system.
We don't know why, but we do know he won't go through with the launch without you.
You're his weakness, his Achilles' heel.
TY-ANNE: I had to continue living with a monster and the only way to live with a monster is to become one yourself.
[high-pitched.]
I'm going to the party, Dad! Try and stop me! Oh, wait, you can't.
You don't have any hands.
Love you anyway.
Bye! - What happened to your voice? - It's called puberty, Dad! TY-ANNE: The voice was an impulsive decision of an angry 14-year-old.
I figured I only had to keep it up for a year or two.
[sighs.]
- Where have you been? - Ugh, Dad! What, you've never been to a breakfast orgy? They didn't have churches in your time? Ohh.
Didn't exactly play the long game on that one.
And I was hungry for so much more.
I can steal files, record conversations.
And risk blowing your cover? You're too valuable.
Okay, if I'm so valuable, how about you let me do something of value? I have a lot of ideas to bolster recruitment, start whisper campaigns, and sowing seeds of doubt about Stu.
I could I could do that.
Actually, I do have an assignment for you.
Tomorrow at 1100 hours, I'm going to need you to go to your bathtub, and enter this code: rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Okay.
And then what? - Then wait.
- Okay.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles Okay, rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Okay.
[hissing.]
[metallic thunk.]
[grunts.]
[coughs.]
[clears throat.]
[tense music.]
[groans.]
Torque? You know what? Don't start.
[sighs.]
[panel whirrs.]
[groans softly.]
I don't wanna be here anymore than you want me here.
I just go where the hack takes me.
Obviously, the hack didn't take you to a shower recently.
[grunts.]
[machine whirrs.]
Oops.
Now I know why Athena left me in the dark about all this.
Her management skills leave much to be desired.
If we weren't forbidden to communicate in writing, I would be crafting a strongly-worded letter right now.
Don't get your bloomers in a rumple.
She doesn't know anything about us, and she kept you in the dark because this op is way above your clearance level.
Okay, this op is taking place in my bedroom, Torque, and my clearance level has everything to do with my undercover status, and nothing to do with my rank.
Yeah, keep telling yourself that.
And your bedroom is more of a staging area for equipment and non-essential personnel.
What the staging area for what? What what's our mission? [sighs.]
My mission is to hack into Stu's operating system, use his sim to turn myself into code, enter his mainframe, and shut down his core processor from within, thus killing him, and saving the world.
Your mission was to open the hatch.
[keyboard clacking.]
Well, I'm I'm coming with you.
- That's a negatory.
- I can help.
[scoffs.]
Adorable.
[dramatic musical sting.]
Adorable.
I'm just protecting the rig.
Look, this is dangerous stuff, Ty-Anne.
If I'm discovered in there, I could be deleted faster than a z-bit giga-compressor can calculate pi to the 485th decimal.
- [grunts.]
- [machine whirrs.]
Ugh.
That's fast.
Well, if you die, I will be sure to notify your wives and husbands.
We were on a break! - [beep.]
- [machine whirring.]
[anticipative music.]
[whooshing.]
So, this is what the inside of a computer looks like.
How the hell did you get in here? Oh, I replicated your wiring sequence and piggy-backed on your signal.
- What you do isn't that hard.
- Ugh.
No, no.
You can't stay.
What are you stop jerking off my head.
You no longer have that privilege.
Shit.
I can't eject you.
- We must be in a closed loop.
- What does that mean? It means neither one of us is getting out of here until we breach the core.
This is bad.
No, it's not bad.
It's an opportunity.
Look, I know you're feeling cooped up in your palace, but you're useless here.
This is my world.
Ugh.
MAN: This is how we do it [Montell Jordan's "This Is How We Do It" playing.]
This is how we do it, la-la-la-la - [coughs.]
- TORQUE: What is this place? It's my house.
Stu has no imagination, so of course he'd make his insides just like his outsides.
- What are they doing? - They're partying.
Stu was never invited to parties as a human, so he got the last laugh by turning himself into one.
It's kinda the coolest and saddest idea all at the same time.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
We're being interfaced.
- We're being interfaced.
- All right oh, hey.
Hi! Splash made.
You have to meet Sylvia, Rigoberta, and Claude.
They will get it.
[stammers.]
Get what? Oh, my God! You look amazing.
I could never pull off that hat, my lady.
[giggles.]
You are so sweet.
I brought this for you 'cause I know that pea-not grigg-io is your favorite flavor of wine.
[laughs.]
You are so funny.
Get the fuck in here.
Bar's over there.
That's the drug corner.
There's a disc jockey playing the jiggiest jams to keep you grooving all night.
Later on, people will be fooling around.
S-E-X [chuckles.]
Yeah.
This is a cool party.
- Oh, Stu.
- Hi! Splash made.
- [relieved sigh.]
- Oh.
- There's the Torque I remember.
- What just happened? I got us into the party.
Catch up.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay, so this must be Stu's code.
Each of these people must be elements of his operating system.
Funny hat lady she was acting like a classic networking protocol.
- She did seem social climb-y.
- Well, that's her job.
She connects system components to one another.
Ringmaster.
That makes sense.
So, all these people are dressed like what they do.
- That's a painter.
- Oh, graphics processor.
- Ah.
- Oh, what about him? The blue man with the satchel and the great ass? - Oh, yeah.
- Wow.
Yeah, mailman.
Delivers messages.
Data transfer.
My God.
They're all here.
This is the most beautiful code I've ever seen.
MAN: South Central does it like nobody does I get it now.
All we have to do is navigate this party the same way we navigate code bypass security to gain access to the core.
- So, where's the - Security? Yeah.
TY-ANNE: That door must be very important 'cause it does not exist in the real version of this place.
I got this.
I'll carry out a multi-pronged DDoS attack on his binary.
Okay, are we sure that's how we wanna play this? Oh, we're sure.
- [hesitantly.]
Mm.
- Initiate dialogue.
- Uh, okay.
- Override firewall.
Run pass intercept 97 - 43-B - C.
- Execute controlled access - You on something, man? [sighs.]
Fine, fine.
I'll do a manual override.
- Of what? - Execute 180 degree rotation.
- [clears throat.]
- Um, excuse me.
I said, execute 180 degree rotation.
MAN: This is how we do it What the? - [coughs.]
- Don't do that.
I don't think your thing worked.
Hi! Splash made.
You have to meet Sylvia, Rigoberta, and Claude.
They will get it.
Hi.
You don't remember Oh, my God! I love that hat, just like you love - pino-gurgo.
- [laughs.]
You are hilarious.
We're gonna get the fuck in there.
Please do.
I love you [laughs.]
Hi! - Splash made.
- We got refreshed.
Our interaction with Security must have been flagged as a glitch.
- Okay, so what do we do? - I don't know.
This code is more sophisticated than anything I've ever dealt with.
We need to abort.
Oh, that's just your answer for everything, isn't it? Last time, we got refreshed.
Who knows what's gonna happen next time? Reboot? Deletion? He can't stop us from trying.
Would you stop acting like a child? MAN: This is how we do it - [coughs.]
- Don't do that.
- MAN: This is how we do it - Why is this happening? Hi! Splash made.
Oh, my God.
Love the hat! Love you.
Take this girgi.
- Is that? - It is! Hi! Splash Are we in hell? Closed loops can be a real slunt-swoggler.
What's wrong here? What are we not seeing? Nothing.
I don't know.
It's just, this party everyone is the right level of drunk.
No one's sloppy.
No one's fighting.
And then the lighting, the music, - it's all just so - Perfect.
There's no conflict.
So, where's the glitch? - Maybe we're the glitch.
- Impossible.
I coded us to fit seamlessly within the OS.
If we behave like everyone else.
You're right.
The system must be designed to operate in perfect harmony, and we're not.
Okay, so we just need to be in in harmony, and that's not that's not hard.
MAN: I'm kinda buzzed and it's all because This is how we do it, ooh, South Central So, in my opinion, we still need to get past Security, even if we're getting along better than ever.
Mmm, yes, that's a good plan.
- I agree with this plan.
- Mm.
And I've noticed that people are getting past Security by whispering something in his ear.
Password.
They're whispering a password.
Yeah, and I bet I know what it is.
I'm uncomfortable with the word "bet.
" [chuckles.]
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
All right, so, okay.
We are dancing in harmony.
- Do this? This is the plan? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, I know Stu better than anyone.
I don't disagree, but a bet, by definition, is risky.
Mm-hmm, yeah, so is life, Torque.
Eh, but enter the wrong password, and you know, we could be wiped.
You know, that means death.
[both laugh mockingly.]
Okay, we're freedom fighters, Torque, why don't you just stop being such a MAN: This is how we do it - [coughs.]
- Hey, don't do that.
Hi! Splash made Oh [laughs.]
Get the fuck in here! - MAN: This is how we do it - Okay.
You have to trust me.
Stu's predictable.
- I know his password.
- I believe you.
Let's just get across this room, try it your way, avoid any hot topics, and keep the language neutral.
Mm-hmm.
Agreed.
MAN: The party's here on the West side So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up Oh, man.
These little green logs are amazing.
Mm-hmm.
They're called pickles.
I'll call them whatever the fuck I wanna call them! That was intentional.
You didn't even wanna try my idea! Bullshit.
They're green and they're log-shaped.
Calling them pickles makes no sense! Fucking dick.
Ugh! [both screaming.]
MAN: This is how we do it Well, that's just the problem with you, isn't it? Everything has to make perfect sense.
No, no, not everything, just the things that have an impact on the rest of our lives.
Like eating people? Oh, I knew you were gonna throw that in my face.
- We could've been happy there.
- In cannibal country? I am not allowed in the NAG.
You couldn't just stay in my room.
Calabasas is off the grid.
We could have just come and gone as we pleased.
But we'd be eating people! Oh, you know what? For you, I I would have developed a taste for it, 'cause you don't choose who you love, but you do get to decide how hard you fight for that person.
Guess we found your limit.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
It's the PIGS Protocol Interference Guard System.
Hi.
- [whooshing.]
- BOTH: Oh.
[partygoers gasp, mutter.]
Splash made.
[woman screams.]
[panicked chatter.]
[suspenseful music.]
- What's happening? - Too much conflict.
[yelps.]
We overloaded the system with our baggage.
Stu is doing a full reboot.
- Okay, how do we stop it? - We can't.
The PIGS won't stop until they've shut down the whole party [hollers.]
Including us.
- [woman screams.]
- Oh.
It's gonna be really weird when your Dad finds our dead bodies in your bedroom.
We're not dying here.
[hollering.]
The password is MyGirl91, isn't it? Enjoy your night.
The gateway to the core processor.
In there is the heart of everything that Stu is.
Okay, so what's our play? My play is to get in there, shut him down manually before the system reboots.
Your play your play is to get out of here.
Just go be the Achilles you were in here today, not some hatch opener.
What are the odds that's gonna work? Ty-Anne, I'm done worrying about the odds.
[sighs softly.]
I was scared.
I just couldn't wrap my head around a life of stolen moments, just some 20% relationship.
But for what it's worth, I would eat a stadium full of people for one more night with you.
- MAN: This is how we do it - [both panting, grunting.]
I can't believe we're fucking inside your Dad.
Okay, shut up.
I'm about to [both moan loudly.]
So, uh, I should probably be getting into that core now.
Yeah, I should, um, I should, you know, eject myself and But this was fun.
We should we should definitely - Yeah, we can.
- [both laugh sheepishly.]
[stammers.]
But I'll see you in a minute.
Yeah, yeah.
I'll see you in a minute.
[sighs.]
[whirring.]
[suspenseful music.]
Daisy, daisy Give me your answer do I'm half crazy [distorted.]
All for the love Of you [singing normally.]
It won't [alarms beeping.]
[panting.]
[electricity crackling.]
[grunts.]
[gagging.]
[grunts, pants.]
It won't be a [distorted.]
Stylish [gagging, hiccups intensify.]
[distored.]
I can't afford A carriage [singing normally.]
But you'll look sweet Upon the seat of a bicycle Built for two Hey, honey.
Hey, did you know that song's actually not called "Daisy"? It's called, "Daisy Bell (Bicycle Built for Two)".
Um, are you feeling okay, or Good enough for another round of "Daisy Bell (Bicycle Built for Two)".
- Wanna join? - [nervous laugh.]
- No.
Your loss! Daisy, daisy [suspenseful music.]
Torque, Torque! Torque! Wake up.
Torque, wake up.
Wake up! God, come on.
[grunts.]
[grunts softly.]
[somber music.]
- [sobs.]
- [machine beeping softly.]
JOSH: Holy shit.
You buried him in your bedroom? That's hardcore.
Sounds like the other me was a real nerd, who kinda died for nothing.
No, it wasn't for nothing.
After that, I took over the Pointed Circle, and Torque's technology allowed us to replicate Stu's sim, which you crashed, giving us hope.
Yeah, until we destroyed it all.
We really fucked up, thinking they were the bad guys.
There is some serious egg on my face.
- We need a new plan.
- Well, we've tried everything.
Stu patched the back door to the sim, and then when we found you, we thought we could upload directly, but We blew up your upload machine.
Yeah, and you killed all our scientists.
I am feeling like an idiot right now.
[soft dramatic music.]
You guys, there's still one upload machine left.
[suspenseful music.]
And we don't need a back door.
Stu's opening the front one for us.
I can crash this sim just as easily as I crashed yours.
I'm gonna go in there and I'm gonna send that computer back to 7734.
- I don't know that reference.
- "Hell.
" It's "hell" in numbers, and upside down.
It's more like a visual kind of joke.
Oh, okay.
So, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're all gonna die.
[ominous music.]
GIRL: Previously on "Future Man" Tiger, meet Ty-Anne, my daughter.
I have one question and just one question only.
Robot or clone? Tell Dad I'm not coming out.
Can't he just, like, walk through the door? We made a deal that we would take my room off the grid so that I could become a woman in private.
Welcome back, Torque.
- How long was I gone? - Two years.
WOLF: I am not the man you think I am.
- LATHE: You're not Torque? - WOLF: Correct.
Do you know where the real Torque is? No.
Oh.
- You wanna live or die? - Uh, live.
- Then you better come with me.
- Who are you? I'm Achilles.
[playful music.]
STU: Oh, yeah, Ty-Anne.
Look at you.
[gasps.]
I'm so proud of you, Ty-Anne.
Come here.
Come here.
Yeah, that's right.
Oh, you're doing so well.
Come here.
TY-ANNE: Let me tell you something about having a computer for a dad.
Oh, yeah, come look oh.
[cries.]
TY-ANNE: It'll fuck you right up.
Kids can't be solved and computers don't like that.
Tie it around the loop.
But I know how much you like diagrams.
- TY-ANNE: I don't.
- So Okay, remember how I told you about the bunny that loves to live in the burrow that's right by the top quarter of your shoe? They hop around and they go into burrows and make knots behind with their tail? I appreciate the effort.
The effort's great, but we're looking for results here.
TY-ANNE: It was like this for everything.
No, not not like that.
[sighs.]
It's just a knot.
TY-ANNE: But I learned to adapt Kind of.
That's such a great hole, honey.
Very creative.
Uh, okay, um, Daddy is gonna be real busy bringing about a unified and lasting world peace, so Dr.
Hogeveen is here to help.
Don't need help.
You can't make me hang out with another ghost-lady! You're solid? That's right, chickadee.
TY-ANNE: And that was the first human I ever met.
We never really did the whole catch thing.
Oh, well, then, that's where we'll start.
Ah.
TY-ANNE: She was the stern governess I didn't know I needed, one who wouldn't let me get away with, well [soft laugh.]
Anything.
[low whistle.]
TY-ANNE: Dr.
Hogeveen taught me that instead of throwing things, I could use words.
Turns out, I was pretty good at it.
So, as you can see, these columns are identical, which is problematic, because you'd think that when a war ended, a person would be allowed to go to a party, but as you can see, a person is not.
[whispers.]
I'm a person.
[laughs softly.]
Wow, honey.
That is such lovely work.
Lovely work [chuckles.]
God, I really like those captivating dissolves too.
Well done.
Yeah.
But I'm afraid you're gonna have to sit this one out.
[hologram whooshes.]
[sighs.]
Listen, when I was your age, I didn't go to parties at any age, really.
I never got invited, and was I upset about that? Yeah, of course, but I got over it, and now, look at me.
I'm immortal, and they're all dead.
So, uh, how about a compromise? [hologram chirping.]
He didn't even look at the whole thing.
I formatted the bibliography in MLA because he's always saying APA's for hacks and journos.
TY-ANNE: Dr.
Hogeveen had no tolerance for tantrums.
To her, emotions were for the weak, but that night, she just let me go.
I can't live in this prison anymore.
He's literally a monster! TY-ANNE: Then dropped a 40 megaton truth-bomb in the heart of my childhood.
You're right.
He is a monster literally.
It's time you learn the truth about Stuart Gavin Camillo.
[dramatic music.]
STU: Adult male, 179 pounds.
I'll tell you anything.
Anything.
[gasps.]
[shuddering.]
[monotone beep.]
Upload failed.
[weak grunt.]
[monotone beep.]
Super-heated hemoglobin trial, fail.
Super-frozen hemoglobin trial, fail.
Polypeptic anti-coagulant phosphate neuro-depressor.
Fail.
I'm so stupid! Why did I think that would work? Fuck! Fuck! Wow, I can't believe I qualified for the test trial.
Since the war ended, my nightmares have just gotten worse.
I didn't even know that "dream relief" was a thing.
[chuckles.]
It is.
Now, just relax.
You're gonna feel a little pinch.
[mellow elevator music.]
- [machine whirrs.]
- [exhales.]
- [alert blares.]
- WOMAN: Hello? What is this place? It's cold, like my nightmares.
Where's my body? Your death will not be for nothing.
- WOMAN: My deat - [machine whirrs down.]
[exhales.]
[laughs softly.]
Well, it took 4,891 eggs to make this omelet [laughs.]
The subject must always enter the system willingly.
It's always the most obvious thing.
[maniacal laugh.]
TY-ANNE: Even though I kind of got it after seven murders, Dr.
Hogeveen insisted on showing me all 4,891.
[sighs.]
She was thorough that way.
She walked me through my father's plan to enslave us all.
Stu sees humanity as a problem.
This is his solution, his final answer to the problem.
So, we tell everyone.
We don't go.
Anyone who refuses to go to Mars gets killed by this.
Okay, it's scary, but we can kill one robot.
He has 12 million of these.
Sorry.
Probably should have mentioned that.
He'll release these on the day of the launch to eliminate any resistance, guard his servers, and make sure evolution doesn't get any ideas to challenge him ever again.
We have to stop him.
Tell me what to do.
Once Stu completes his upload centers, he'll say we're ready to go to M.
A.
R.
S.
- You have to say no.
- Why? - What will that do? - Stu needs you.
He feels a connection to you more powerful than anything else in his system.
We don't know why, but we do know he won't go through with the launch without you.
You're his weakness, his Achilles' heel.
TY-ANNE: I had to continue living with a monster and the only way to live with a monster is to become one yourself.
[high-pitched.]
I'm going to the party, Dad! Try and stop me! Oh, wait, you can't.
You don't have any hands.
Love you anyway.
Bye! - What happened to your voice? - It's called puberty, Dad! TY-ANNE: The voice was an impulsive decision of an angry 14-year-old.
I figured I only had to keep it up for a year or two.
[sighs.]
- Where have you been? - Ugh, Dad! What, you've never been to a breakfast orgy? They didn't have churches in your time? Ohh.
Didn't exactly play the long game on that one.
And I was hungry for so much more.
I can steal files, record conversations.
And risk blowing your cover? You're too valuable.
Okay, if I'm so valuable, how about you let me do something of value? I have a lot of ideas to bolster recruitment, start whisper campaigns, and sowing seeds of doubt about Stu.
I could I could do that.
Actually, I do have an assignment for you.
Tomorrow at 1100 hours, I'm going to need you to go to your bathtub, and enter this code: rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Okay.
And then what? - Then wait.
- Okay.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles Okay, rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Rose petal, rose petal, geranium, bubbles.
Okay.
[hissing.]
[metallic thunk.]
[grunts.]
[coughs.]
[clears throat.]
[tense music.]
[groans.]
Torque? You know what? Don't start.
[sighs.]
[panel whirrs.]
[groans softly.]
I don't wanna be here anymore than you want me here.
I just go where the hack takes me.
Obviously, the hack didn't take you to a shower recently.
[grunts.]
[machine whirrs.]
Oops.
Now I know why Athena left me in the dark about all this.
Her management skills leave much to be desired.
If we weren't forbidden to communicate in writing, I would be crafting a strongly-worded letter right now.
Don't get your bloomers in a rumple.
She doesn't know anything about us, and she kept you in the dark because this op is way above your clearance level.
Okay, this op is taking place in my bedroom, Torque, and my clearance level has everything to do with my undercover status, and nothing to do with my rank.
Yeah, keep telling yourself that.
And your bedroom is more of a staging area for equipment and non-essential personnel.
What the staging area for what? What what's our mission? [sighs.]
My mission is to hack into Stu's operating system, use his sim to turn myself into code, enter his mainframe, and shut down his core processor from within, thus killing him, and saving the world.
Your mission was to open the hatch.
[keyboard clacking.]
Well, I'm I'm coming with you.
- That's a negatory.
- I can help.
[scoffs.]
Adorable.
[dramatic musical sting.]
Adorable.
I'm just protecting the rig.
Look, this is dangerous stuff, Ty-Anne.
If I'm discovered in there, I could be deleted faster than a z-bit giga-compressor can calculate pi to the 485th decimal.
- [grunts.]
- [machine whirrs.]
Ugh.
That's fast.
Well, if you die, I will be sure to notify your wives and husbands.
We were on a break! - [beep.]
- [machine whirring.]
[anticipative music.]
[whooshing.]
So, this is what the inside of a computer looks like.
How the hell did you get in here? Oh, I replicated your wiring sequence and piggy-backed on your signal.
- What you do isn't that hard.
- Ugh.
No, no.
You can't stay.
What are you stop jerking off my head.
You no longer have that privilege.
Shit.
I can't eject you.
- We must be in a closed loop.
- What does that mean? It means neither one of us is getting out of here until we breach the core.
This is bad.
No, it's not bad.
It's an opportunity.
Look, I know you're feeling cooped up in your palace, but you're useless here.
This is my world.
Ugh.
MAN: This is how we do it [Montell Jordan's "This Is How We Do It" playing.]
This is how we do it, la-la-la-la - [coughs.]
- TORQUE: What is this place? It's my house.
Stu has no imagination, so of course he'd make his insides just like his outsides.
- What are they doing? - They're partying.
Stu was never invited to parties as a human, so he got the last laugh by turning himself into one.
It's kinda the coolest and saddest idea all at the same time.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
We're being interfaced.
- We're being interfaced.
- All right oh, hey.
Hi! Splash made.
You have to meet Sylvia, Rigoberta, and Claude.
They will get it.
[stammers.]
Get what? Oh, my God! You look amazing.
I could never pull off that hat, my lady.
[giggles.]
You are so sweet.
I brought this for you 'cause I know that pea-not grigg-io is your favorite flavor of wine.
[laughs.]
You are so funny.
Get the fuck in here.
Bar's over there.
That's the drug corner.
There's a disc jockey playing the jiggiest jams to keep you grooving all night.
Later on, people will be fooling around.
S-E-X [chuckles.]
Yeah.
This is a cool party.
- Oh, Stu.
- Hi! Splash made.
- [relieved sigh.]
- Oh.
- There's the Torque I remember.
- What just happened? I got us into the party.
Catch up.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay, so this must be Stu's code.
Each of these people must be elements of his operating system.
Funny hat lady she was acting like a classic networking protocol.
- She did seem social climb-y.
- Well, that's her job.
She connects system components to one another.
Ringmaster.
That makes sense.
So, all these people are dressed like what they do.
- That's a painter.
- Oh, graphics processor.
- Ah.
- Oh, what about him? The blue man with the satchel and the great ass? - Oh, yeah.
- Wow.
Yeah, mailman.
Delivers messages.
Data transfer.
My God.
They're all here.
This is the most beautiful code I've ever seen.
MAN: South Central does it like nobody does I get it now.
All we have to do is navigate this party the same way we navigate code bypass security to gain access to the core.
- So, where's the - Security? Yeah.
TY-ANNE: That door must be very important 'cause it does not exist in the real version of this place.
I got this.
I'll carry out a multi-pronged DDoS attack on his binary.
Okay, are we sure that's how we wanna play this? Oh, we're sure.
- [hesitantly.]
Mm.
- Initiate dialogue.
- Uh, okay.
- Override firewall.
Run pass intercept 97 - 43-B - C.
- Execute controlled access - You on something, man? [sighs.]
Fine, fine.
I'll do a manual override.
- Of what? - Execute 180 degree rotation.
- [clears throat.]
- Um, excuse me.
I said, execute 180 degree rotation.
MAN: This is how we do it What the? - [coughs.]
- Don't do that.
I don't think your thing worked.
Hi! Splash made.
You have to meet Sylvia, Rigoberta, and Claude.
They will get it.
Hi.
You don't remember Oh, my God! I love that hat, just like you love - pino-gurgo.
- [laughs.]
You are hilarious.
We're gonna get the fuck in there.
Please do.
I love you [laughs.]
Hi! - Splash made.
- We got refreshed.
Our interaction with Security must have been flagged as a glitch.
- Okay, so what do we do? - I don't know.
This code is more sophisticated than anything I've ever dealt with.
We need to abort.
Oh, that's just your answer for everything, isn't it? Last time, we got refreshed.
Who knows what's gonna happen next time? Reboot? Deletion? He can't stop us from trying.
Would you stop acting like a child? MAN: This is how we do it - [coughs.]
- Don't do that.
- MAN: This is how we do it - Why is this happening? Hi! Splash made.
Oh, my God.
Love the hat! Love you.
Take this girgi.
- Is that? - It is! Hi! Splash Are we in hell? Closed loops can be a real slunt-swoggler.
What's wrong here? What are we not seeing? Nothing.
I don't know.
It's just, this party everyone is the right level of drunk.
No one's sloppy.
No one's fighting.
And then the lighting, the music, - it's all just so - Perfect.
There's no conflict.
So, where's the glitch? - Maybe we're the glitch.
- Impossible.
I coded us to fit seamlessly within the OS.
If we behave like everyone else.
You're right.
The system must be designed to operate in perfect harmony, and we're not.
Okay, so we just need to be in in harmony, and that's not that's not hard.
MAN: I'm kinda buzzed and it's all because This is how we do it, ooh, South Central So, in my opinion, we still need to get past Security, even if we're getting along better than ever.
Mmm, yes, that's a good plan.
- I agree with this plan.
- Mm.
And I've noticed that people are getting past Security by whispering something in his ear.
Password.
They're whispering a password.
Yeah, and I bet I know what it is.
I'm uncomfortable with the word "bet.
" [chuckles.]
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
All right, so, okay.
We are dancing in harmony.
- Do this? This is the plan? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, I know Stu better than anyone.
I don't disagree, but a bet, by definition, is risky.
Mm-hmm, yeah, so is life, Torque.
Eh, but enter the wrong password, and you know, we could be wiped.
You know, that means death.
[both laugh mockingly.]
Okay, we're freedom fighters, Torque, why don't you just stop being such a MAN: This is how we do it - [coughs.]
- Hey, don't do that.
Hi! Splash made Oh [laughs.]
Get the fuck in here! - MAN: This is how we do it - Okay.
You have to trust me.
Stu's predictable.
- I know his password.
- I believe you.
Let's just get across this room, try it your way, avoid any hot topics, and keep the language neutral.
Mm-hmm.
Agreed.
MAN: The party's here on the West side So I reach for my 40 and I turn it up Oh, man.
These little green logs are amazing.
Mm-hmm.
They're called pickles.
I'll call them whatever the fuck I wanna call them! That was intentional.
You didn't even wanna try my idea! Bullshit.
They're green and they're log-shaped.
Calling them pickles makes no sense! Fucking dick.
Ugh! [both screaming.]
MAN: This is how we do it Well, that's just the problem with you, isn't it? Everything has to make perfect sense.
No, no, not everything, just the things that have an impact on the rest of our lives.
Like eating people? Oh, I knew you were gonna throw that in my face.
- We could've been happy there.
- In cannibal country? I am not allowed in the NAG.
You couldn't just stay in my room.
Calabasas is off the grid.
We could have just come and gone as we pleased.
But we'd be eating people! Oh, you know what? For you, I I would have developed a taste for it, 'cause you don't choose who you love, but you do get to decide how hard you fight for that person.
Guess we found your limit.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
It's the PIGS Protocol Interference Guard System.
Hi.
- [whooshing.]
- BOTH: Oh.
[partygoers gasp, mutter.]
Splash made.
[woman screams.]
[panicked chatter.]
[suspenseful music.]
- What's happening? - Too much conflict.
[yelps.]
We overloaded the system with our baggage.
Stu is doing a full reboot.
- Okay, how do we stop it? - We can't.
The PIGS won't stop until they've shut down the whole party [hollers.]
Including us.
- [woman screams.]
- Oh.
It's gonna be really weird when your Dad finds our dead bodies in your bedroom.
We're not dying here.
[hollering.]
The password is MyGirl91, isn't it? Enjoy your night.
The gateway to the core processor.
In there is the heart of everything that Stu is.
Okay, so what's our play? My play is to get in there, shut him down manually before the system reboots.
Your play your play is to get out of here.
Just go be the Achilles you were in here today, not some hatch opener.
What are the odds that's gonna work? Ty-Anne, I'm done worrying about the odds.
[sighs softly.]
I was scared.
I just couldn't wrap my head around a life of stolen moments, just some 20% relationship.
But for what it's worth, I would eat a stadium full of people for one more night with you.
- MAN: This is how we do it - [both panting, grunting.]
I can't believe we're fucking inside your Dad.
Okay, shut up.
I'm about to [both moan loudly.]
So, uh, I should probably be getting into that core now.
Yeah, I should, um, I should, you know, eject myself and But this was fun.
We should we should definitely - Yeah, we can.
- [both laugh sheepishly.]
[stammers.]
But I'll see you in a minute.
Yeah, yeah.
I'll see you in a minute.
[sighs.]
[whirring.]
[suspenseful music.]
Daisy, daisy Give me your answer do I'm half crazy [distorted.]
All for the love Of you [singing normally.]
It won't [alarms beeping.]
[panting.]
[electricity crackling.]
[grunts.]
[gagging.]
[grunts, pants.]
It won't be a [distorted.]
Stylish [gagging, hiccups intensify.]
[distored.]
I can't afford A carriage [singing normally.]
But you'll look sweet Upon the seat of a bicycle Built for two Hey, honey.
Hey, did you know that song's actually not called "Daisy"? It's called, "Daisy Bell (Bicycle Built for Two)".
Um, are you feeling okay, or Good enough for another round of "Daisy Bell (Bicycle Built for Two)".
- Wanna join? - [nervous laugh.]
- No.
Your loss! Daisy, daisy [suspenseful music.]
Torque, Torque! Torque! Wake up.
Torque, wake up.
Wake up! God, come on.
[grunts.]
[grunts softly.]
[somber music.]
- [sobs.]
- [machine beeping softly.]
JOSH: Holy shit.
You buried him in your bedroom? That's hardcore.
Sounds like the other me was a real nerd, who kinda died for nothing.
No, it wasn't for nothing.
After that, I took over the Pointed Circle, and Torque's technology allowed us to replicate Stu's sim, which you crashed, giving us hope.
Yeah, until we destroyed it all.
We really fucked up, thinking they were the bad guys.
There is some serious egg on my face.
- We need a new plan.
- Well, we've tried everything.
Stu patched the back door to the sim, and then when we found you, we thought we could upload directly, but We blew up your upload machine.
Yeah, and you killed all our scientists.
I am feeling like an idiot right now.
[soft dramatic music.]
You guys, there's still one upload machine left.
[suspenseful music.]
And we don't need a back door.
Stu's opening the front one for us.
I can crash this sim just as easily as I crashed yours.
I'm gonna go in there and I'm gonna send that computer back to 7734.
- I don't know that reference.
- "Hell.
" It's "hell" in numbers, and upside down.
It's more like a visual kind of joke.
Oh, okay.
So, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're all gonna die.
[ominous music.]