Infinity Train (2019) s02e10 Episode Script
The Number Car
1 Glad-One: Do be careful.
I think you accidentally slipped and broke a porter.
Sad-One: Many, many times in a row.
[Grunting.]
Hey, I know you.
You're the rare foil version of my friend Tulip.
Aghhh! I'm not Tulip.
I'm not foil.
I'm not reflection.
I'm not a sliver.
I'm not a null.
I'm not any of the hundreds of names that everyone wants to give me.
I'm my own person who is getting off this train, and whatever gears or reality-bending buttons you've got to press, you're gonna do it.
But why would I? You're exactly where you're supposed to be.
- No.
- No? No.
Give me my exit.
You can't have an exit.
You don't have a number.
Ugh! Give me a number then! Numbers are for passengers.
How can I expect someone to grow emotionally without some nice, juicy math? Fine.
Give me some trials, whatever.
Take my memories.
Tape me.
I don't care! Let's do it! No, you'll stay and keep helping.
You're so good at it.
I can show you.
[Beeping.]
Sad-One: Ah, let's see.
What was your passenger's name? Jesse.
His name is Jesse.
Oh, yes, thank you.
See? So helpful.
Here we go.
He got down to zero, all sorted out and off the hmm? He can't be at zero but also in process.
So if he's being processed Then he's back on the train.
Field trip to the passenger farm! Alan Dracula! Oh! Hey, buddy.
Jesse! Glad-One: Field trip to the memory-watching machine! Glad-One: Well, I don't get it.
We fixed him already.
Sad-One: Yet that greedy little piglet is thirsty for more.
[Beep.]
Glad-One: Oh, new release! Gimme, gimme, gimme! Let's take a peek.
Ahhh! Glad-One: Ooh, a tape has never started on the train before.
Tape Glad-One: Remember, you can't spell "escape" without companionship.
Uh, companion-shape? Companion-scape.
Com-scape-ionship.
Constipation.
Hey, come back! That didn't explain anything.
Tape Sad-One: of transformation.
Ah! I didn't realize he was so scared.
Ah! Glad-One: Oh, look, you've got costar billing now.
Sad-One: But you'll probably be paid less because Hollywood breeds gender inequality.
You can't even help yourself.
That's why passengers get on this train in the first place! Hey, don't push Ah! Your friends are bad.
You know that, right? Maybe.
Glad-One: Oh, train does it again.
Look how much he's grown.
I guess I changed, too.
Memory Jesse: I got you.
We're getting out of here.
Sad-One: This is my favorite part.
Please don't show me this.
Ah! Ah! MT? Where'd you go? MT! Jesse! Jesse! Where have you been? Nate.
Ah! I wasn't sure I'd see you again.
I shouldn't have let those guys hurt you.
I I shouldn't have hurt you.
I'm so sorry.
Ah, I-it's okay.
W-what about you? Where did you go? Glad-One: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we don't need to hear it.
We just watched the hi-def version.
[Tape rewinding.]
And now I'm here, and she's still trapped on the train with those flecs.
Do you think she's okay? I don't know.
I mean, she's MT.
She can probably take care of herself, but I promised we'd stay together.
So what are you gonna do? I I just need to sit here and think for a bit.
Okay? Okay.
Uh, I'll go get some food or something.
Be right back.
I can't leave her there.
[Zap!.]
Uh.
Now will you wake him up? Glad-One: Oh, heavens no.
Waking a passenger is a whole process.
It involves robots and coding and juice boxes and - Ugh! - Wha! - Ah! - Ah, ah, ah! Where am I? MT! Jesse, I thought you were gone! MT, I didn't think I would find you so fast! [Both talking rapidly at once.]
[Laughs.]
A.
D.
! Sad-One: Excuse me, young man.
This train is for fixing problems, not for hang time with buds.
Oh, I have a problem.
My friend is trapped on a train.
Glad-One: Whoo-hoo! Number time! Ah! Ah! Okay, this is terrifying.
Ah! Hey, let go of me! Oh, stop it.
You'll hurt my steward's feelings.
Ah! Ah! Uh, is that supposed to happen? [Rumbling.]
Glad-One: The train fixes problems, but his problem is that he needs to rescue his friend.
Sad-One: But his friend is a denizen who can't get a number.
She can't leave.
So his problem is unfixable.
No, no, no, his problem has to be fixed.
That's what we do.
We're the fixers.
We fix.
Oh, I have an idea.
Why doesn't she go with? Good plan.
Oh, but she doesn't have a number.
She has to get off, but she can't get off without a number.
He's stuck in a loop.
The train can't process it.
There's no escape, sliver! Ah! Oh, leave me alone! I won't go back! I'm not taking you anywhere.
I'm taking you out.
You killed Mace.
No more badges.
No more protocol.
Sad-One: But he can't leave with her.
That won't work, but I guess he won't get off the train.
Glad-One: Number, number, number, number, number.
Hey, you! It's your lucky day.
You got a problem? I got a solution.
He can't save her if there's nothing to save.
Just help me sand her.
Problem solved! Sad-One: Yeah, that would solve things.
No! Wait, um, One-One, I'm confused.
What's the purpose of the train again? Glad-One: Oh, it's to help passengers.
But wait.
Your problem needs us to let a denizen off.
Can't do that without a number.
So I guess he can't leave and - Aah! - Aah! [All grunting.]
Hey! Aah! Ugh.
Jesse! Ah! Agh! Agh! Agh! Ugh! Ugh! I only killed Mace because he was trying to kill me.
And I'm finishing it for him.
Ah! Agh! Come on.
[Grunts.]
Sad-One: Ah, but he needs to get off the train, too, but if she Ugh.
Ugh.
[Gasps.]
Oh.
One-one, look! I have a number.
So you can give me an exit.
That's how it works, right? Glad-One: He can't leave his friend, but she's a denizen.
Denizens don't have numbers.
[Grunting.]
But you have a number, so So we get our exit? Hmm.
Sad-One: Yeah, sure, whatever.
[Zapping.]
Ah! Huh? We're leaving together, for real this time.
[Both panting.]
Aaah! Oh! No! Ah! Ah! You're done, sliver.
[Grunting.]
Whoa! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Alan Dracula! [Zapping.]
Aah! Aaaah! [Sniffing.]
Glad-One: Wow! That was something, huh? Well, looks like I gotta get you back home.
I really broke the mold with you, Alan Dracula.
[Water lapping, birds chirping.]
I'm I-I'm off the train.
[Sniffles.]
Yeah, [laughs.]
you are.
Jesse, you better not disappear again.
The chrome girl is real.
Yeah, yeah, get it out of your system.
Hi.
I-I'm Nate.
Uh, hi, Nate.
I'm Hmm.
Dracula Two? Mm.
- I'm Lake.
- Cool name.
Your brother's got good taste.
[Clang.]
Aah! [Laughter.]
I wanted to be cool one time, just once.
[Laughter continues.]
Mirror Tulip: Nerd.
I think you accidentally slipped and broke a porter.
Sad-One: Many, many times in a row.
[Grunting.]
Hey, I know you.
You're the rare foil version of my friend Tulip.
Aghhh! I'm not Tulip.
I'm not foil.
I'm not reflection.
I'm not a sliver.
I'm not a null.
I'm not any of the hundreds of names that everyone wants to give me.
I'm my own person who is getting off this train, and whatever gears or reality-bending buttons you've got to press, you're gonna do it.
But why would I? You're exactly where you're supposed to be.
- No.
- No? No.
Give me my exit.
You can't have an exit.
You don't have a number.
Ugh! Give me a number then! Numbers are for passengers.
How can I expect someone to grow emotionally without some nice, juicy math? Fine.
Give me some trials, whatever.
Take my memories.
Tape me.
I don't care! Let's do it! No, you'll stay and keep helping.
You're so good at it.
I can show you.
[Beeping.]
Sad-One: Ah, let's see.
What was your passenger's name? Jesse.
His name is Jesse.
Oh, yes, thank you.
See? So helpful.
Here we go.
He got down to zero, all sorted out and off the hmm? He can't be at zero but also in process.
So if he's being processed Then he's back on the train.
Field trip to the passenger farm! Alan Dracula! Oh! Hey, buddy.
Jesse! Glad-One: Field trip to the memory-watching machine! Glad-One: Well, I don't get it.
We fixed him already.
Sad-One: Yet that greedy little piglet is thirsty for more.
[Beep.]
Glad-One: Oh, new release! Gimme, gimme, gimme! Let's take a peek.
Ahhh! Glad-One: Ooh, a tape has never started on the train before.
Tape Glad-One: Remember, you can't spell "escape" without companionship.
Uh, companion-shape? Companion-scape.
Com-scape-ionship.
Constipation.
Hey, come back! That didn't explain anything.
Tape Sad-One: of transformation.
Ah! I didn't realize he was so scared.
Ah! Glad-One: Oh, look, you've got costar billing now.
Sad-One: But you'll probably be paid less because Hollywood breeds gender inequality.
You can't even help yourself.
That's why passengers get on this train in the first place! Hey, don't push Ah! Your friends are bad.
You know that, right? Maybe.
Glad-One: Oh, train does it again.
Look how much he's grown.
I guess I changed, too.
Memory Jesse: I got you.
We're getting out of here.
Sad-One: This is my favorite part.
Please don't show me this.
Ah! Ah! MT? Where'd you go? MT! Jesse! Jesse! Where have you been? Nate.
Ah! I wasn't sure I'd see you again.
I shouldn't have let those guys hurt you.
I I shouldn't have hurt you.
I'm so sorry.
Ah, I-it's okay.
W-what about you? Where did you go? Glad-One: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we don't need to hear it.
We just watched the hi-def version.
[Tape rewinding.]
And now I'm here, and she's still trapped on the train with those flecs.
Do you think she's okay? I don't know.
I mean, she's MT.
She can probably take care of herself, but I promised we'd stay together.
So what are you gonna do? I I just need to sit here and think for a bit.
Okay? Okay.
Uh, I'll go get some food or something.
Be right back.
I can't leave her there.
[Zap!.]
Uh.
Now will you wake him up? Glad-One: Oh, heavens no.
Waking a passenger is a whole process.
It involves robots and coding and juice boxes and - Ugh! - Wha! - Ah! - Ah, ah, ah! Where am I? MT! Jesse, I thought you were gone! MT, I didn't think I would find you so fast! [Both talking rapidly at once.]
[Laughs.]
A.
D.
! Sad-One: Excuse me, young man.
This train is for fixing problems, not for hang time with buds.
Oh, I have a problem.
My friend is trapped on a train.
Glad-One: Whoo-hoo! Number time! Ah! Ah! Okay, this is terrifying.
Ah! Hey, let go of me! Oh, stop it.
You'll hurt my steward's feelings.
Ah! Ah! Uh, is that supposed to happen? [Rumbling.]
Glad-One: The train fixes problems, but his problem is that he needs to rescue his friend.
Sad-One: But his friend is a denizen who can't get a number.
She can't leave.
So his problem is unfixable.
No, no, no, his problem has to be fixed.
That's what we do.
We're the fixers.
We fix.
Oh, I have an idea.
Why doesn't she go with? Good plan.
Oh, but she doesn't have a number.
She has to get off, but she can't get off without a number.
He's stuck in a loop.
The train can't process it.
There's no escape, sliver! Ah! Oh, leave me alone! I won't go back! I'm not taking you anywhere.
I'm taking you out.
You killed Mace.
No more badges.
No more protocol.
Sad-One: But he can't leave with her.
That won't work, but I guess he won't get off the train.
Glad-One: Number, number, number, number, number.
Hey, you! It's your lucky day.
You got a problem? I got a solution.
He can't save her if there's nothing to save.
Just help me sand her.
Problem solved! Sad-One: Yeah, that would solve things.
No! Wait, um, One-One, I'm confused.
What's the purpose of the train again? Glad-One: Oh, it's to help passengers.
But wait.
Your problem needs us to let a denizen off.
Can't do that without a number.
So I guess he can't leave and - Aah! - Aah! [All grunting.]
Hey! Aah! Ugh.
Jesse! Ah! Agh! Agh! Agh! Ugh! Ugh! I only killed Mace because he was trying to kill me.
And I'm finishing it for him.
Ah! Agh! Come on.
[Grunts.]
Sad-One: Ah, but he needs to get off the train, too, but if she Ugh.
Ugh.
[Gasps.]
Oh.
One-one, look! I have a number.
So you can give me an exit.
That's how it works, right? Glad-One: He can't leave his friend, but she's a denizen.
Denizens don't have numbers.
[Grunting.]
But you have a number, so So we get our exit? Hmm.
Sad-One: Yeah, sure, whatever.
[Zapping.]
Ah! Huh? We're leaving together, for real this time.
[Both panting.]
Aaah! Oh! No! Ah! Ah! You're done, sliver.
[Grunting.]
Whoa! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Alan Dracula! [Zapping.]
Aah! Aaaah! [Sniffing.]
Glad-One: Wow! That was something, huh? Well, looks like I gotta get you back home.
I really broke the mold with you, Alan Dracula.
[Water lapping, birds chirping.]
I'm I-I'm off the train.
[Sniffles.]
Yeah, [laughs.]
you are.
Jesse, you better not disappear again.
The chrome girl is real.
Yeah, yeah, get it out of your system.
Hi.
I-I'm Nate.
Uh, hi, Nate.
I'm Hmm.
Dracula Two? Mm.
- I'm Lake.
- Cool name.
Your brother's got good taste.
[Clang.]
Aah! [Laughter.]
I wanted to be cool one time, just once.
[Laughter continues.]
Mirror Tulip: Nerd.