Men of a Certain Age s02e10 Episode Script
Can't Let That Slide
Hey, Joe! Hey.
Sneaking up on me there.
- How you doin'? - Good, good.
Uh, is this a bad time? Nah, nah, it's cool.
Tran's cool.
Come on in, buddy.
- Wow, I'm on a losing streak here.
- Yeah.
Can't pick 'em to save my life.
Yeah, happens, right? - $500, right? - Yeah.
Hey, uh, what's the line on Kentucky/Duke? Think I want to go a grand on Kentucky.
Oh, uh, gee, I don't know.
Off the top of my head, don't know.
I'd have to check with, uh, Manfro.
Right, right.
How's he doing, by the way? Yeah, you know, not too good.
Chemo, all that.
Well, you're a good man, you know, doing all this legwork for him.
I'm sure he appreciates it.
Yeah, thanks.
All right, I'll, uh, check the line for you.
Yeah.
Oh, hey, I know another guy who wants some action on that same game.
Oh, well, I don't know think Manfro's taking on new clients.
He's in the neighborhood.
Works over on Ventura.
He's just itching to lay down some bets is all.
No biggie.
Yeah, no.
All right, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Order that pineapple Where on Ventura? When I grow up to be a man will I dig the same things that turn me on as a kid? will I look back and say that I wish I hadn't done what I did? will I joke around and still dig those sounds when I grow up to be a man? Men of a Certain Age 2x10 Can't Let That Slide Here's the paperwork on those high-mileage cars Donny's buying.
He took 12 this month.
Pretty good.
12 cars, and this is all we get? He's lowballing the shit out of us.
I've checked around.
That's what all the wholesalers are paying.
Hey, um, look at this for a second.
These are the, um, customer-satisfaction cards from last month.
Straight fives: "Extremely satisfied.
" Looks good.
Hold on, now.
Now, look at the customer comments from the website.
"The customer service is so lousy, I wanted to 'Thoreau' up!" "A 'terriable' car-buying 'experiance.
'" or, "I felt like I needed a shower after dealing with the oily salesman.
" That's just the Internet.
It's all anonymous.
People can say anything.
Okay, but the cards are bullshit.
The cards are bullshit.
Got guys sitting right down there, pressuring the customer to give them a good report.
Shit, they forget that I used to work the floor.
Maybe it's time for some "Secret Shoppers.
" Nah, that's a hassle.
All those fake customers coming in, taking up the guys' time.
Now it's all done by hidden camera -- easy.
Scarpulla hires a company that takes care of the whole thing.
How do you know what Scarpulla is doing? Carl told me.
That's how he got fired.
Carl Our Carl? Yep.
He got caught hawking his band's CDs to the customers.
Really? Yeah, but not to worry.
According to this card "My salesman Carl was da bomb.
" Uh, Mr.
Joe Uh, we have a candy delivery come Thursday morning.
Okay, yeah.
Dashaun say he no can be here.
Uh, you can come? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I do it, but, uh, I no have key.
You want to give me key? It's okay, Carlos.
I'll be here.
Okay.
Yeah.
Hey.
What's up? How you -- oh.
Uh, you there? You stopped? Ca-- I can see you, but I can't hear you.
Oh, I hear you a little bit.
Are you there? Uh, you're not moving.
All right, are we not -- we're not -- you -- you've stopped the video? I know it's you.
I'm still -- can you hear me? Just call me.
Hey, you ever use the, uh, video-chat thing on your computer? Um, no.
Let me ask you something.
Can somebody see you anytime your computer's on? I told you I didn't use it, but, um, no, I don't think so.
Hmm.
Are you kidding me? What? Did he say that he was bringing her? No.
Gentlemen Hey.
Hey.
How are you? How's it goin'? You missed a great hike.
Yeah, it was so hot up there, though.
I'm just gonna run to the ladies' room.
Be right back.
Hey, you want to swing around so I can sit next to Erin? I tell you guys, she is in great shape.
We did the big loop in an hour and 20.
Without whining.
That's awesome.
Here.
Put that away.
What's the matter with you? Nothing.
What? Come on.
You're being all terse.
I'm not terse.
You don't have a problem with Erin being here, do you? No, it's totally cool.
It would have been nice, maybe, to get a little notice.
Should I have called you to tell you that she was coming? No, don't be a dick about it.
It's just, I don't know.
What if I have a sensitive topic I just want to discuss? - Then you should discuss it.
- Really? So, if I got an issue with, um, my balls, she's okay hearing about that? Do you have an issue with your balls? I kind of do, yeah.
Nothing life-threatening, but something I might want to bounce off you guys.
Then lay it on us.
No, don't.
And don't you go acting like having her here is just some normal shit.
Oh, why can't you guys just roll with this? It's no big deal.
You could bring Melissa if you want to.
I don't want to bring Melissa.
That's the point.
And even if I asked her, she wouldn't come.
I don't know.
This just feels like our thing.
It still is our thing.
Okay, fine.
Then, when she gets back, I'm talking about my scrotum.
Looking forward to it.
Plus, you got Laura over there.
She's giving you the stink-eye.
Nah, nah.
She's cool.
We never defined things.
How is ithow is Erin even back in the picture? You said she went back to her old boyfriend.
What happened? She said she knew right away that she'd made a mistake.
Hey, look, she tried to make it work for five years.
There was just no magic there.
You're magical? What can I say? She can't live without me.
Oh, God, really? I've been with you five minutes, and I want out.
Hey, babe.
Hey, babe.
Excuse me, miss.
I'd love a cup if you get a second.
Sure thing.
Thank you.
So, um, we saw the fantasy woman.
Oh, yeah.
You know about her, huh? Yeah, Terry told me you like 'em big, Joe, but that's really an understatement.
I just put in my password and, um Antilock brakes Watch.
So, you're spying on the employees.
No.
It's an instructional tool.
I can show this to my guys and say, you know, "Good job, so-and-so," or, "Hey, whoever, this is something you might want to work on.
" Mm-hmm.
Um, what else can I tell you? Uh, it's, uh, you've got individual climate control -- driver and passenger.
Saved a lot of marriages.
You know, "He's hot, she's cold.
" Well, tell C.
J.
that -- yo, make a left here.
Yo, tell him that -- I mean right, right, right.
Sorry.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Dude! Be careful, man! Sorry, man.
I'm at work.
Vanity mirrors on both sides.
Check this out -- a map light.
Or a French-fry finder.
Um, eh How about this sound system, man? Bass just, like, kicks.
Pull over at this newsstand.
I got to grab the paper real quick.
This car's satellite system has 250 satellite channels.
Hope you don't mind.
I've been on my feet all day.
I have CDs for sale.
Really, I just want to use it for emergencies.
That's the only time I'd use it.
Right, okay.
Uh, well, yeah, I mean, that's great if you want to use it for emergencies.
First thing we should do is show you how to turn it on.
So, um, just press that button right there.
That button right there.
Excuse me for just a second.
Hey, can I help you with something? Hey, yeah.
Uh, you're, uh, the friend of Bill's? The um The, uh, basketball fan? Yeah.
Uh Yeah.
Hey, uh, thanks for coming by.
Marty.
Hey.
I'm JoeOrge.
Hey.
Good to meet you George.
SoDo you think, uh, maybe I could get some action on Kentucky/Duke? Got a line on that? Uh, yeah, Duke's giving three and a half.
Perfect.
Can I get five g's on Kentucky? Going big -- Kentucky, huh? Yeah.
Yeah, that's your friend, Bill -- he bet the same team.
Uh, you know, Duke's been looking pretty good the last couple weeks.
Yeah.
Yeah, they crushed Tennessee, huh? Yeah.
They're tough.
Yeah.
Nah, you know what? Let me have Kentucky.
I have a good feeling about this one.
So $5,000, yeah? Yeah.
Something's happening! Uh So, we good? Uh, yeah.
- Okay.
Uh, yeah, Kentucky.
- Right.
Cool.
All right.
Thank you.
All right.
Let's see.
Oh, you turned it on.
Perfect.
So, you do the same thing when you want to turn it off.
Just press that again, hold it down.
Wow, that was great.
I loved the grapefruit in the salad.
You want me to cook dinner tomorrow night? I can get some salmon at the Farmers' Market.
Oh, tomorrow's no good.
It's the district teachers' recognition dinner.
I'm being officially recognized for my 15 years of service.
Wow.
Congratulations.
Need a date? Oh, God, no.
It's in the high-school cafeteria.
Oh, well, we got to do something to celebrate.
Ah, hey! We can do it on Friday night.
I got a great idea.
Yeah, me too.
You can present me with a glass of wine and then another glass of wine.
Yes, wine is key.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I really have to go to bed.
I can't.
And, um, you've probably got to go home.
Well, um, actually, I don't -- I don't have to go home.
Really? No.
I, uhhave a toothbrush in the car.
I see.
And a shirt.
And a suit.
I'm prepared.
You're quite the boy scout.
Mm-hmm.
I really do have to get to bed.
Yeah, yeah.
Me too.
Hey.
Not taking the hat off.
So, don't ask.
Yeah, it's no problem.
I thought my head was bad bald till I saw my ass.
Who knew all that hair was there for a reason? I got you this.
Mahmood's? Yeah.
You're a sweetheart, Joe.
And I mean that in the gayest way possible.
Okay.
I appreciate you doing this.
Look at me.
98 degrees out -- I'm shivering like I'm on freakin' Mount Everest.
Oh, and excuse the smell.
Haven't been able to walk him.
I bought that "indoor doggie lawn" piece of shit.
Catches the pee in a tray.
Great coming home from chemo and lifting up a tray of piss.
All right, so, uh, where am I going with old bullethead? Just around the block.
Let me get you a poop bag.
What are you doing? You still working? Oh, that? Couple of bets here and there.
Gotta do a little business.
I don't want to get myself in a hole.
What if you did, though, get in a hole? You know, what if you didn't have the money to pay the bets? Always got to pay.
They do, so you do.
Don't be a Yeah, that's for the dog, not you.
Where's that freakin' leash? Yeah, but don't you ever get, like, too many people betting on one team? Or some guy just bets way too much? Like you did with the 25k? Yeah, I guess.
Yeah, that was crazy.
I had to lay that off.
What do you mean? You had New York, right? I bet like 15 grand on New York myself with a couple other bookies.
I couldn't risk taking that big a hit.
You all right? Yeah, I'm fine.
You got to carry him the last part 'cause he don't like the sticky leaves.
Come on, buddy.
Oh, man, it stinks down here.
Yeah, that was me.
I was trying it out.
Hey, Ted.
Come on.
Here, kitty.
There you are.
Hey, come here.
Here you go, buddy.
You know you're up early when you beat a teacher out of bed.
Good morning.
I told Owen I'd take the early shift.
Oh, dragon breath, no.
You don't scare me.
I just had coffee.
I left you some.
And I made scones.
If they're cold, cut them and then toast them -- 'cause if you microwave 'em, they'll turn rock-hard.
Okay.
Great.
So, Ted has food.
But I noticed this morning when I went out and grabbed the paper that your front-door lock was sticking.
Oh, yeah, that's been funky for a while.
I'll take a look at it later.
I got to go.
I know tonight's your big dinner.
How about we meet up for lunch? Oh, I can't.
I have to tutor.
Okay.
Tomorrow, then? I have a staff meeting tomorrow.
All right.
I tell you what.
I'm gonna get off early tomorrow.
Why don't we grab a cup of coffee after school? Uh, okay, sure.
Okay.
Great.
3:30 at Peet's.
Uh Looking forward to it.
So, it's, uh, come to my attention that, uh, things have been getting a little, uh, lax when it comes to customer service.
And I just wanted to remind everybody to stay on top of your games, okay? I've just been, um, thinking of, um, kind of a basic list of dos and don'ts Just off the top of my head, uh, spitballing, hypothetical.
For example, uh, no personal calls during test drives.
Takes the focus off the customers.
That can't be good.
Um No, uh, eating on test drives.
I don't care how hungry you are, do not eat in the cars when you're with customers.
Okay? Let's see -- um Oh, uh, this -- this one may seem like, uh, common sense, but, um, if you've got, um Oh, a band to promote or CDs to sell, do that on your own time.
If you feel the need to read the newspaper, do that at home.
Personal grooming of any kind -- do that at home.
Do not refer to the map light as a "French-fry finder.
" And for God's sake, let's keep our shoes on at all times.
If you're trying to sell a car, the last thing a customer needs is to see or smell your nasty, nasty feet.
In general, uh, we'd like to see an uptick in professionalism and a downtick in, um -- how shall I put it? -- uh, bullshit.
Okay? Good.
Let's sell some cars Professionally.
Well, I think that put the fear of God in them.
UhYou know, sometimes people have a condition with their feet that's um And that's a 3-pointer.
Duke's back up by 8.
Oh, what happened, man? They were up 10 points with 3 minutes to go.
Yeah.
Suck.
I know.
I tried to warn you, right? Yeah, Duke's been playing well.
This just isn't my day.
You know, now I'm stuck in this shithole in the middle of a heat wave with a broken A/C.
Yeah, it is hot in here, right? You still got the old one? You know, the new one's a lot faster.
I've got it here Oh, no.
Yeah, I probably -- I don't even know how to use this one, so, no.
Uh, so, I should probably get going.
Yeah, my boss is here right now.
So, it's not a good time, okay? Oh, yeah.
Uh You want to meet me outside? Yeah, see, the thing is, I just moved into a new place.
And I don't get paid till next week, so But I'm good for it, though.
Oh, uh Oh, hey.
Can I help you? Uh, my wife was in yesterday.
She bought me a camera for my birthday.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I remember, nice lady.
You guys are going to San Fran, right? Right, right.
I just need to pick up a spare battery.
Right over here.
Now, what kind of, uh, camera is that? Um, here you go.
This -- have you had a chance to play with this yet? No, I haven't looked at it yet.
It's, uh, great picture quality, but the thing with autofocus is when you're in low-light situations You sure Joe's not coming? No.
He said he had, uh, shit to do at the store.
We never defined things.
Yeah, she seems cool with it.
This is a little petty, though.
Used to slide me a whole fruit salad.
Now I just got a tiny little cup of grapes.
Dude, you're lucky she didn't slide you a cup of something much, much worse.
Anyway, the boss is probably wise to this whole fruit-salad scam.
Not everybody monitors their employees the way you do, big brother.
Oh, don't give me that shit.
People were coasting.
I was pleasantly surprised that you weren't caught in any high jinks at all.
What'd you think you'd catch me doing? I don't know.
Taking a nap, um, smoking a doob.
"Smokin' a doob.
" Anyway, um, as a reward for your fine conduct, I'm sending you to Loma Linda today to pick up a Suburban on a dealer swap.
Oh, I can't.
I'm having coffee with Erin.
Um, okay, but I need that Suburban today.
Um, have coffee tomorrow.
Tomorrow's our special dinner.
What's a What? I'm just saying.
We couldn't have lunch yesterday or today, so Dude, this is a workday, and I need you to do this.
JustReschedule.
Really? Really.
Fine.
I'm sorry this is such an inconvenience to you, but this is your job.
No, no, no.
I get it.
Your business comes first.
Hey, I could use a glass of water if you -- o-kay.
Carlos, what's all this? Candy.
I tried to cover them.
I tried to move them.
I can't do nothing.
Is melting all morning.
Is it all -- oh, shit.
- This is $1,200 worth of candy.
- I sorry.
Uh, you tell me you will come, but you don't come.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
Oh, shit.
It's -- sorry.
It's not your fault.
You forget to come? Yeah.
No, no.
I just -- I had some other stuff.
You busy play golf? Yeah.
No, no, some other stuff.
You have woman? Carlos, no.
Justput your shirt on.
Come on.
I think you have woman.
Oh, shit.
Shit.
Shit.
Look at all this.
There you are! Nice.
Hey, hey.
Hi.
You never called me back.
I didn't know if you got my message 'cause you are so lame with a computer.
I am.
I know.
Sorry.
I just, uh Got a little situation here.
Is that chocolate? It was.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I just -- I meant to call you back.
And then I had a whole bunch of crap to do this morning, and this happened.
What were you doing? You golfing? Uh, no.
No, I just I had to go, uh I had to get something from a guy.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
You were busy playing bookie, right? No.
Let's go in here.
Oh Well, you've been leading quite the little double life here, haven't you? No.
It's no big deal, really.
I'm not a bookie.
I'm just taking bets for a friend.
That's all I'm doing.
Okay, okay.
So, what did you do today? Uh, no, nothing.
Just -- I had to go talk to this guy, and, um Get the money.
I got to say -- it's very, very hot.
It's like the movies.
You're like Robert de Niro in "Casino.
" No.
No, I'm not.
Oh, come on, Joe.
Oh, I spent all morning in a conference room listening to a bunch of guys talk about strategic management.
Let me have this, okay? Right here.
Just Okay, that needs to go.
This one okay.
No melt.
Um, hold on, hold on, hold on.
I got to do this.
Oh.
Yeah, you, uh, got a lot going on.
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
Let me, um I'll call you.
Yeah, you do that, Bugsy.
Listen, I'm in town for another day, and, uh, then I'm back in Denver for a month.
So All right, well Don't be shy.
Let's call, though.
No computer.
No.
You're allergic.
All right.
Bingo! Got individual climate control -- driver and passenger.
Hey.
Hi.
You still watching the guys? How'd you get my password? You mean "funkyman123," your password for everything? Oh, I guess not anymore.
Anyway, the good news is that your salesmen are doing better.
The bad news -- it's really boring.
Yep, I think I'm gonna, um, pull all those cameras out at the end of the week.
No! You're canceling my favorite show? Now, young lady, I think you've had enough computer for one day.
Please, just five minutes.
Go outside and play.
Sorry.
The boss is inside.
I couldn't get away.
Let's do this quick.
No problem.
What? Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business with you, Donny.
It's Bruce.
Let's do this quick.
No problem.
Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business I thought it was weird that the other wholesalers stopped coming around.
This bastard's been taking kickbacks to keep 'em away.
Maybe there's an explanation.
Explanation? Daddy, he's skimming.
Um, you heard it.
Plus, I've seen the numbers.
Now it makes sense.
Why'd you have to start making trouble with all your video bullshit? Daddy, you're getting mad at the wrong guy here.
Well, what do you suggest that we do? He stole from us.
Damn it.
He's been with me since -- If he'd have just come to me, I could have -- I know, daddy.
I know.
Okay.
Um We can't do it at the office.
I don't want to embarrass the man.
I understand.
You're the boss now.
You do it.
I -- Where the hell's Terry? Probably with Erin.
Can no longer digest his food unless he's staring into her eyes.
Uh Forget her, dude.
This is gonna be like in college.
Remember, uh, Hungry Charlie's? We couldn't drink there for a year 'cause he slept with the bartender.
You gonna eat or what? Nah, I'm not hungry.
Come on, man.
You keep this up, I'm not gonna be able to do fat jokes.
That's like half my repertoire.
Hmm.
What? What's going on? I have to, um I have to fire a guy at the dealership -- Bruce.
Which one is he? The kind of old guy with the beard? Yeah.
We caught him on camera taking kickbacks.
Whoa.
And from the looks of it, it's been going on for a while.
So I have to sit him down today and, uh Ah, my stomach's going crazy.
Man, I hate this.
Yeah, it's the worst.
Honestly I don't know if I can do it.
I mean, Bruce is like an Uncle to me.
He's been with my dad 30 years.
Yeah, but, I mean, you got to do it, right? Can't let people take advantage of you.
Yeah, you know, um This guy was out there playing softball with a $2,000 watch.
He bought that with my money.
That's -- that's my watch, actually, right? I mean -- I mean, if I -- if I let this slide, where does it end? Can't let it slide.
Yeah, sometimes you got to be the hard ass, right? That's the price of being boss.
That's right.
I'm gonna throw up.
Yeah, me too.
Gorgeous, gorgeous car.
Hottest demo on the lot.
I wanted to chauffeur you in style in honor of your 15 years of dedicated service to the youth of Los Angeles.
You look really nice.
Am I gonna be okay? - Is this place fancy? - Nah, you're fine.
'Cause you could swing by my place so I could use the bathroom, grab a jacket.
Uh, actually, no.
They're kind of weird about being on time.
So, uh Hey, look, I got an extra suit in the trunk.
If it gets chilly by the ocean, you just wear my jacket.
Ooh, it's by the ocean! Oh! All right, all right! No more hints, okay? It'll ruin the surprise.
Anyway, we'll be there in no time.
I really have to pee.
Terry, I'm not kidding.
I'm really -- I'm gonna need a bathroom.
Well, there must be an accident up here or something.
Could you maybe take the next exit? Cutting it pretty close if you want to keep our table.
You know what? Maybe -- maybe I should try the surface streets.
You know, I could probably take, uh, Pico, huh? Well, whatever you do, could you do it kind of fast? Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, Pico's probably the way to go.
Guess Pico wasn't the way to go.
Okay, this isn't funny.
I really -- I have to pee now.
Just -- just hang on.
I'm hanging.
I'm hanging on.
I tell you what.
Can you just, uh -- can you call the restaurant and tell them we're gonna be late? No, Terry, I can't.
I can't.
The number is in there, okay? I think the hostess' name is Rachel.
Seriously, seriously -- I need you to pull over to a -- I don't know -- a coffee shop, or a gas station -- anything, something, I have no idea what's around here.
I really don't.
You know what? Just -- why don't you turn around and take me home? I'm sure we can get to the restaurant.
We haven't moved in 10 minutes.
It's just easier to turn around.
- Can you just hang on?! - Forget the restaurant, Terry! I don't care about the restaurant! I have to pee! Take me home now! Wha-- Terry, hurry, come on.
Oh! I need my keys! I need my keys! I got 'em.
I got 'em.
Okay.
I'll get it.
Terry, come on, come on.
Hurry.
Terry, hurry.
Come on.
Oh.
Okay.
Got it.
Okay.
Come on, come on, come on.
Oh, I told you this lock was sticky.
I'm -- I'm peeing right now.
Shit.
Oh, that's just I just peed my pants.
Oh, hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey, uh We're technically closed, but I guess I can make an exception.
Yeah, you know, I was in the neighborhood, so So, uh, you decide to go for that new phone after all? No.
See, actually, I really need the money.
It was a big bet.
Yeah, well, I told you I'm good for it.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
It's just, uh, you know, the policy -- you bet, and, uh Yeah, look, I-I get it, man.
You don't know me.
You need some collateral.
So, uh, how about I set you up with some stuff in the meantime? You can take a hands-free set for your phone.
Or maybe a camera charger or something? - Yeah, no, no.
- Look around.
- You can take whatever - That's not the policy.
Uh, hey, I'm sorry.
You just You're putting me in a bad spot here.
I-I'm sorry.
You know, why don't you put me on a payment plan or something like that? I can't do that, no.
Listen, George, I'm kind of going through a whole thing right now, okay, so I-I don't know.
I guess it all kind of got away from me.
Uh Look, I just needed to hit that this one time.
You know, just one more -- one stupid time, you know -- and I would be out of this stupid hole That -- that I'm in now! Like, I -- you know, my wife left me.
She took the kids.
I'm staying in this piece-of-shit apartment.
My kids are 7 and 8.
I feel like a total asshole! I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't have it.
I don't have it.
I don't have it.
I'm sorry.
I don't know what to say.
I'm sorry.
I just -- Okay.
It's okay.
Locksmith's gonna be here in a few minutes, so Okay.
I called like four different guys, you know? I got a lot of voicemail.
Guess everybody's locked out tonight, huh? Thanks for the pants.
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry.
This was not how this was supposed to go.
No? No.
I just -- I just really want this to work.
It is working.
I mean, not, you know, this whole thing, but Look I know that I Took off on you.
And I would give anything to go back in time and not do that.
But the thing is, I'm here now.
And I'm not going anywhere.
So we don't have to, you know, push or force anything.
We can take it slow and just enjoy each other 'cause We're together now.
I don't want to take it slow.
I've been taking it slow for 50 years.
I always take it slow, and it always just -- it goes away, you know? I've spent my adult life "Not being in a place where I'm looking for something serious," "Not defining things right now," and you know what? UmI'm done.
So let's define things right now.
Let's move in together.
Okay.
Let's move into my place, though, 'cause your place sucks.
- Let's do this quick.
- No problem.
Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business with you, Donny.
I know it is.
I'll pay it back.
It really was just a mistake.
I know, Bruce.
I know.
But you understand, we have to, um That's not good enough.
Look, I'm so sorry.
I-I know.
I know.
Look, the guys don't have to know.
We'll tell them you, um Chose to take early retirement.
It was so stupid.
I I mean, I was just trying to pay myself a little fee.
Oh, don't give me that horse shit! 30 years together.
Get your ass out the door! Go on, get out! What, should I just call Manfro directly? No, no.
Don't call him.
Don't tell him See, that's what I'm saying.
He's not doing well right now.
So he's gonna shut down the whole operation.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, the, uh, the stress, you know -- doesn't want any of it.
Yeah, I-I get it.
He's got a whole different thing going on now.
All right, so, uh All right.
Well, uh Take care, Joe.
Yeah, okay, you too.
I'm thinking about heading out to Lake Havasu.
Float around, fish a little, drink a little Drink a little more.
Take it easy.
Boys! Come on! Dinner's gonna be ready in 10 minutes! Hey.
What's up? I'm -- Weird Joe, you're off the hook.
No more dog-walking for you.
Guess who's back in the picture.
Jennifer.
- The stripper? - "Dancer.
" A little respect.
Yeah, well, congratulations.
So, um, you feeling all right? Well, yeah.
There's a stripper coming over.
"Dancer.
" Shit.
I'll get it.
Yeah, so, anyway, I'm almost to the point where I could haul my hairless, skinny ass around the block.
Well, that's good.
That's -- really, that's great.
You did me a big favor, so thanks.
You're a good guy, Joe.
Come here.
Come here.
Oh, no! Still? Terry, hurry, come on.
Good God.
We were thinking of changing the name of our band to "Free Money.
" Lame.
No, no, it's good because then we can make posters that say, "Free Money -- Saturday night!" That's lame.
No.
It's a joke.
You don't get it.
I get it.
Then admit that it's genius.
Dad, you're not actually gonna let him do that, are you? Well, I'm not gonna stand in the way of genius.
Burn! Burn! You got burned, girl! Do this.
Oh, yeah.
You are the lamest father/son combo ever.
You got that right.
Mostly me, though.
Amen.
Mm, if we don't do "Free Money," we were thinking, "Free Beer.
" Yeah, no.
I'm done.
So let's define things right now.
Let's move in together.
Okay.
Ooh.
Oh, man.
Sneaking up on me there.
- How you doin'? - Good, good.
Uh, is this a bad time? Nah, nah, it's cool.
Tran's cool.
Come on in, buddy.
- Wow, I'm on a losing streak here.
- Yeah.
Can't pick 'em to save my life.
Yeah, happens, right? - $500, right? - Yeah.
Hey, uh, what's the line on Kentucky/Duke? Think I want to go a grand on Kentucky.
Oh, uh, gee, I don't know.
Off the top of my head, don't know.
I'd have to check with, uh, Manfro.
Right, right.
How's he doing, by the way? Yeah, you know, not too good.
Chemo, all that.
Well, you're a good man, you know, doing all this legwork for him.
I'm sure he appreciates it.
Yeah, thanks.
All right, I'll, uh, check the line for you.
Yeah.
Oh, hey, I know another guy who wants some action on that same game.
Oh, well, I don't know think Manfro's taking on new clients.
He's in the neighborhood.
Works over on Ventura.
He's just itching to lay down some bets is all.
No biggie.
Yeah, no.
All right, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Order that pineapple Where on Ventura? When I grow up to be a man will I dig the same things that turn me on as a kid? will I look back and say that I wish I hadn't done what I did? will I joke around and still dig those sounds when I grow up to be a man? Men of a Certain Age 2x10 Can't Let That Slide Here's the paperwork on those high-mileage cars Donny's buying.
He took 12 this month.
Pretty good.
12 cars, and this is all we get? He's lowballing the shit out of us.
I've checked around.
That's what all the wholesalers are paying.
Hey, um, look at this for a second.
These are the, um, customer-satisfaction cards from last month.
Straight fives: "Extremely satisfied.
" Looks good.
Hold on, now.
Now, look at the customer comments from the website.
"The customer service is so lousy, I wanted to 'Thoreau' up!" "A 'terriable' car-buying 'experiance.
'" or, "I felt like I needed a shower after dealing with the oily salesman.
" That's just the Internet.
It's all anonymous.
People can say anything.
Okay, but the cards are bullshit.
The cards are bullshit.
Got guys sitting right down there, pressuring the customer to give them a good report.
Shit, they forget that I used to work the floor.
Maybe it's time for some "Secret Shoppers.
" Nah, that's a hassle.
All those fake customers coming in, taking up the guys' time.
Now it's all done by hidden camera -- easy.
Scarpulla hires a company that takes care of the whole thing.
How do you know what Scarpulla is doing? Carl told me.
That's how he got fired.
Carl Our Carl? Yep.
He got caught hawking his band's CDs to the customers.
Really? Yeah, but not to worry.
According to this card "My salesman Carl was da bomb.
" Uh, Mr.
Joe Uh, we have a candy delivery come Thursday morning.
Okay, yeah.
Dashaun say he no can be here.
Uh, you can come? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I do it, but, uh, I no have key.
You want to give me key? It's okay, Carlos.
I'll be here.
Okay.
Yeah.
Hey.
What's up? How you -- oh.
Uh, you there? You stopped? Ca-- I can see you, but I can't hear you.
Oh, I hear you a little bit.
Are you there? Uh, you're not moving.
All right, are we not -- we're not -- you -- you've stopped the video? I know it's you.
I'm still -- can you hear me? Just call me.
Hey, you ever use the, uh, video-chat thing on your computer? Um, no.
Let me ask you something.
Can somebody see you anytime your computer's on? I told you I didn't use it, but, um, no, I don't think so.
Hmm.
Are you kidding me? What? Did he say that he was bringing her? No.
Gentlemen Hey.
Hey.
How are you? How's it goin'? You missed a great hike.
Yeah, it was so hot up there, though.
I'm just gonna run to the ladies' room.
Be right back.
Hey, you want to swing around so I can sit next to Erin? I tell you guys, she is in great shape.
We did the big loop in an hour and 20.
Without whining.
That's awesome.
Here.
Put that away.
What's the matter with you? Nothing.
What? Come on.
You're being all terse.
I'm not terse.
You don't have a problem with Erin being here, do you? No, it's totally cool.
It would have been nice, maybe, to get a little notice.
Should I have called you to tell you that she was coming? No, don't be a dick about it.
It's just, I don't know.
What if I have a sensitive topic I just want to discuss? - Then you should discuss it.
- Really? So, if I got an issue with, um, my balls, she's okay hearing about that? Do you have an issue with your balls? I kind of do, yeah.
Nothing life-threatening, but something I might want to bounce off you guys.
Then lay it on us.
No, don't.
And don't you go acting like having her here is just some normal shit.
Oh, why can't you guys just roll with this? It's no big deal.
You could bring Melissa if you want to.
I don't want to bring Melissa.
That's the point.
And even if I asked her, she wouldn't come.
I don't know.
This just feels like our thing.
It still is our thing.
Okay, fine.
Then, when she gets back, I'm talking about my scrotum.
Looking forward to it.
Plus, you got Laura over there.
She's giving you the stink-eye.
Nah, nah.
She's cool.
We never defined things.
How is ithow is Erin even back in the picture? You said she went back to her old boyfriend.
What happened? She said she knew right away that she'd made a mistake.
Hey, look, she tried to make it work for five years.
There was just no magic there.
You're magical? What can I say? She can't live without me.
Oh, God, really? I've been with you five minutes, and I want out.
Hey, babe.
Hey, babe.
Excuse me, miss.
I'd love a cup if you get a second.
Sure thing.
Thank you.
So, um, we saw the fantasy woman.
Oh, yeah.
You know about her, huh? Yeah, Terry told me you like 'em big, Joe, but that's really an understatement.
I just put in my password and, um Antilock brakes Watch.
So, you're spying on the employees.
No.
It's an instructional tool.
I can show this to my guys and say, you know, "Good job, so-and-so," or, "Hey, whoever, this is something you might want to work on.
" Mm-hmm.
Um, what else can I tell you? Uh, it's, uh, you've got individual climate control -- driver and passenger.
Saved a lot of marriages.
You know, "He's hot, she's cold.
" Well, tell C.
J.
that -- yo, make a left here.
Yo, tell him that -- I mean right, right, right.
Sorry.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Dude! Be careful, man! Sorry, man.
I'm at work.
Vanity mirrors on both sides.
Check this out -- a map light.
Or a French-fry finder.
Um, eh How about this sound system, man? Bass just, like, kicks.
Pull over at this newsstand.
I got to grab the paper real quick.
This car's satellite system has 250 satellite channels.
Hope you don't mind.
I've been on my feet all day.
I have CDs for sale.
Really, I just want to use it for emergencies.
That's the only time I'd use it.
Right, okay.
Uh, well, yeah, I mean, that's great if you want to use it for emergencies.
First thing we should do is show you how to turn it on.
So, um, just press that button right there.
That button right there.
Excuse me for just a second.
Hey, can I help you with something? Hey, yeah.
Uh, you're, uh, the friend of Bill's? The um The, uh, basketball fan? Yeah.
Uh Yeah.
Hey, uh, thanks for coming by.
Marty.
Hey.
I'm JoeOrge.
Hey.
Good to meet you George.
SoDo you think, uh, maybe I could get some action on Kentucky/Duke? Got a line on that? Uh, yeah, Duke's giving three and a half.
Perfect.
Can I get five g's on Kentucky? Going big -- Kentucky, huh? Yeah.
Yeah, that's your friend, Bill -- he bet the same team.
Uh, you know, Duke's been looking pretty good the last couple weeks.
Yeah.
Yeah, they crushed Tennessee, huh? Yeah.
They're tough.
Yeah.
Nah, you know what? Let me have Kentucky.
I have a good feeling about this one.
So $5,000, yeah? Yeah.
Something's happening! Uh So, we good? Uh, yeah.
- Okay.
Uh, yeah, Kentucky.
- Right.
Cool.
All right.
Thank you.
All right.
Let's see.
Oh, you turned it on.
Perfect.
So, you do the same thing when you want to turn it off.
Just press that again, hold it down.
Wow, that was great.
I loved the grapefruit in the salad.
You want me to cook dinner tomorrow night? I can get some salmon at the Farmers' Market.
Oh, tomorrow's no good.
It's the district teachers' recognition dinner.
I'm being officially recognized for my 15 years of service.
Wow.
Congratulations.
Need a date? Oh, God, no.
It's in the high-school cafeteria.
Oh, well, we got to do something to celebrate.
Ah, hey! We can do it on Friday night.
I got a great idea.
Yeah, me too.
You can present me with a glass of wine and then another glass of wine.
Yes, wine is key.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I really have to go to bed.
I can't.
And, um, you've probably got to go home.
Well, um, actually, I don't -- I don't have to go home.
Really? No.
I, uhhave a toothbrush in the car.
I see.
And a shirt.
And a suit.
I'm prepared.
You're quite the boy scout.
Mm-hmm.
I really do have to get to bed.
Yeah, yeah.
Me too.
Hey.
Not taking the hat off.
So, don't ask.
Yeah, it's no problem.
I thought my head was bad bald till I saw my ass.
Who knew all that hair was there for a reason? I got you this.
Mahmood's? Yeah.
You're a sweetheart, Joe.
And I mean that in the gayest way possible.
Okay.
I appreciate you doing this.
Look at me.
98 degrees out -- I'm shivering like I'm on freakin' Mount Everest.
Oh, and excuse the smell.
Haven't been able to walk him.
I bought that "indoor doggie lawn" piece of shit.
Catches the pee in a tray.
Great coming home from chemo and lifting up a tray of piss.
All right, so, uh, where am I going with old bullethead? Just around the block.
Let me get you a poop bag.
What are you doing? You still working? Oh, that? Couple of bets here and there.
Gotta do a little business.
I don't want to get myself in a hole.
What if you did, though, get in a hole? You know, what if you didn't have the money to pay the bets? Always got to pay.
They do, so you do.
Don't be a Yeah, that's for the dog, not you.
Where's that freakin' leash? Yeah, but don't you ever get, like, too many people betting on one team? Or some guy just bets way too much? Like you did with the 25k? Yeah, I guess.
Yeah, that was crazy.
I had to lay that off.
What do you mean? You had New York, right? I bet like 15 grand on New York myself with a couple other bookies.
I couldn't risk taking that big a hit.
You all right? Yeah, I'm fine.
You got to carry him the last part 'cause he don't like the sticky leaves.
Come on, buddy.
Oh, man, it stinks down here.
Yeah, that was me.
I was trying it out.
Hey, Ted.
Come on.
Here, kitty.
There you are.
Hey, come here.
Here you go, buddy.
You know you're up early when you beat a teacher out of bed.
Good morning.
I told Owen I'd take the early shift.
Oh, dragon breath, no.
You don't scare me.
I just had coffee.
I left you some.
And I made scones.
If they're cold, cut them and then toast them -- 'cause if you microwave 'em, they'll turn rock-hard.
Okay.
Great.
So, Ted has food.
But I noticed this morning when I went out and grabbed the paper that your front-door lock was sticking.
Oh, yeah, that's been funky for a while.
I'll take a look at it later.
I got to go.
I know tonight's your big dinner.
How about we meet up for lunch? Oh, I can't.
I have to tutor.
Okay.
Tomorrow, then? I have a staff meeting tomorrow.
All right.
I tell you what.
I'm gonna get off early tomorrow.
Why don't we grab a cup of coffee after school? Uh, okay, sure.
Okay.
Great.
3:30 at Peet's.
Uh Looking forward to it.
So, it's, uh, come to my attention that, uh, things have been getting a little, uh, lax when it comes to customer service.
And I just wanted to remind everybody to stay on top of your games, okay? I've just been, um, thinking of, um, kind of a basic list of dos and don'ts Just off the top of my head, uh, spitballing, hypothetical.
For example, uh, no personal calls during test drives.
Takes the focus off the customers.
That can't be good.
Um No, uh, eating on test drives.
I don't care how hungry you are, do not eat in the cars when you're with customers.
Okay? Let's see -- um Oh, uh, this -- this one may seem like, uh, common sense, but, um, if you've got, um Oh, a band to promote or CDs to sell, do that on your own time.
If you feel the need to read the newspaper, do that at home.
Personal grooming of any kind -- do that at home.
Do not refer to the map light as a "French-fry finder.
" And for God's sake, let's keep our shoes on at all times.
If you're trying to sell a car, the last thing a customer needs is to see or smell your nasty, nasty feet.
In general, uh, we'd like to see an uptick in professionalism and a downtick in, um -- how shall I put it? -- uh, bullshit.
Okay? Good.
Let's sell some cars Professionally.
Well, I think that put the fear of God in them.
UhYou know, sometimes people have a condition with their feet that's um And that's a 3-pointer.
Duke's back up by 8.
Oh, what happened, man? They were up 10 points with 3 minutes to go.
Yeah.
Suck.
I know.
I tried to warn you, right? Yeah, Duke's been playing well.
This just isn't my day.
You know, now I'm stuck in this shithole in the middle of a heat wave with a broken A/C.
Yeah, it is hot in here, right? You still got the old one? You know, the new one's a lot faster.
I've got it here Oh, no.
Yeah, I probably -- I don't even know how to use this one, so, no.
Uh, so, I should probably get going.
Yeah, my boss is here right now.
So, it's not a good time, okay? Oh, yeah.
Uh You want to meet me outside? Yeah, see, the thing is, I just moved into a new place.
And I don't get paid till next week, so But I'm good for it, though.
Oh, uh Oh, hey.
Can I help you? Uh, my wife was in yesterday.
She bought me a camera for my birthday.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I remember, nice lady.
You guys are going to San Fran, right? Right, right.
I just need to pick up a spare battery.
Right over here.
Now, what kind of, uh, camera is that? Um, here you go.
This -- have you had a chance to play with this yet? No, I haven't looked at it yet.
It's, uh, great picture quality, but the thing with autofocus is when you're in low-light situations You sure Joe's not coming? No.
He said he had, uh, shit to do at the store.
We never defined things.
Yeah, she seems cool with it.
This is a little petty, though.
Used to slide me a whole fruit salad.
Now I just got a tiny little cup of grapes.
Dude, you're lucky she didn't slide you a cup of something much, much worse.
Anyway, the boss is probably wise to this whole fruit-salad scam.
Not everybody monitors their employees the way you do, big brother.
Oh, don't give me that shit.
People were coasting.
I was pleasantly surprised that you weren't caught in any high jinks at all.
What'd you think you'd catch me doing? I don't know.
Taking a nap, um, smoking a doob.
"Smokin' a doob.
" Anyway, um, as a reward for your fine conduct, I'm sending you to Loma Linda today to pick up a Suburban on a dealer swap.
Oh, I can't.
I'm having coffee with Erin.
Um, okay, but I need that Suburban today.
Um, have coffee tomorrow.
Tomorrow's our special dinner.
What's a What? I'm just saying.
We couldn't have lunch yesterday or today, so Dude, this is a workday, and I need you to do this.
JustReschedule.
Really? Really.
Fine.
I'm sorry this is such an inconvenience to you, but this is your job.
No, no, no.
I get it.
Your business comes first.
Hey, I could use a glass of water if you -- o-kay.
Carlos, what's all this? Candy.
I tried to cover them.
I tried to move them.
I can't do nothing.
Is melting all morning.
Is it all -- oh, shit.
- This is $1,200 worth of candy.
- I sorry.
Uh, you tell me you will come, but you don't come.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
Oh, shit.
It's -- sorry.
It's not your fault.
You forget to come? Yeah.
No, no.
I just -- I had some other stuff.
You busy play golf? Yeah.
No, no, some other stuff.
You have woman? Carlos, no.
Justput your shirt on.
Come on.
I think you have woman.
Oh, shit.
Shit.
Shit.
Look at all this.
There you are! Nice.
Hey, hey.
Hi.
You never called me back.
I didn't know if you got my message 'cause you are so lame with a computer.
I am.
I know.
Sorry.
I just, uh Got a little situation here.
Is that chocolate? It was.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I just -- I meant to call you back.
And then I had a whole bunch of crap to do this morning, and this happened.
What were you doing? You golfing? Uh, no.
No, I just I had to go, uh I had to get something from a guy.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
You were busy playing bookie, right? No.
Let's go in here.
Oh Well, you've been leading quite the little double life here, haven't you? No.
It's no big deal, really.
I'm not a bookie.
I'm just taking bets for a friend.
That's all I'm doing.
Okay, okay.
So, what did you do today? Uh, no, nothing.
Just -- I had to go talk to this guy, and, um Get the money.
I got to say -- it's very, very hot.
It's like the movies.
You're like Robert de Niro in "Casino.
" No.
No, I'm not.
Oh, come on, Joe.
Oh, I spent all morning in a conference room listening to a bunch of guys talk about strategic management.
Let me have this, okay? Right here.
Just Okay, that needs to go.
This one okay.
No melt.
Um, hold on, hold on, hold on.
I got to do this.
Oh.
Yeah, you, uh, got a lot going on.
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
Let me, um I'll call you.
Yeah, you do that, Bugsy.
Listen, I'm in town for another day, and, uh, then I'm back in Denver for a month.
So All right, well Don't be shy.
Let's call, though.
No computer.
No.
You're allergic.
All right.
Bingo! Got individual climate control -- driver and passenger.
Hey.
Hi.
You still watching the guys? How'd you get my password? You mean "funkyman123," your password for everything? Oh, I guess not anymore.
Anyway, the good news is that your salesmen are doing better.
The bad news -- it's really boring.
Yep, I think I'm gonna, um, pull all those cameras out at the end of the week.
No! You're canceling my favorite show? Now, young lady, I think you've had enough computer for one day.
Please, just five minutes.
Go outside and play.
Sorry.
The boss is inside.
I couldn't get away.
Let's do this quick.
No problem.
What? Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business with you, Donny.
It's Bruce.
Let's do this quick.
No problem.
Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business I thought it was weird that the other wholesalers stopped coming around.
This bastard's been taking kickbacks to keep 'em away.
Maybe there's an explanation.
Explanation? Daddy, he's skimming.
Um, you heard it.
Plus, I've seen the numbers.
Now it makes sense.
Why'd you have to start making trouble with all your video bullshit? Daddy, you're getting mad at the wrong guy here.
Well, what do you suggest that we do? He stole from us.
Damn it.
He's been with me since -- If he'd have just come to me, I could have -- I know, daddy.
I know.
Okay.
Um We can't do it at the office.
I don't want to embarrass the man.
I understand.
You're the boss now.
You do it.
I -- Where the hell's Terry? Probably with Erin.
Can no longer digest his food unless he's staring into her eyes.
Uh Forget her, dude.
This is gonna be like in college.
Remember, uh, Hungry Charlie's? We couldn't drink there for a year 'cause he slept with the bartender.
You gonna eat or what? Nah, I'm not hungry.
Come on, man.
You keep this up, I'm not gonna be able to do fat jokes.
That's like half my repertoire.
Hmm.
What? What's going on? I have to, um I have to fire a guy at the dealership -- Bruce.
Which one is he? The kind of old guy with the beard? Yeah.
We caught him on camera taking kickbacks.
Whoa.
And from the looks of it, it's been going on for a while.
So I have to sit him down today and, uh Ah, my stomach's going crazy.
Man, I hate this.
Yeah, it's the worst.
Honestly I don't know if I can do it.
I mean, Bruce is like an Uncle to me.
He's been with my dad 30 years.
Yeah, but, I mean, you got to do it, right? Can't let people take advantage of you.
Yeah, you know, um This guy was out there playing softball with a $2,000 watch.
He bought that with my money.
That's -- that's my watch, actually, right? I mean -- I mean, if I -- if I let this slide, where does it end? Can't let it slide.
Yeah, sometimes you got to be the hard ass, right? That's the price of being boss.
That's right.
I'm gonna throw up.
Yeah, me too.
Gorgeous, gorgeous car.
Hottest demo on the lot.
I wanted to chauffeur you in style in honor of your 15 years of dedicated service to the youth of Los Angeles.
You look really nice.
Am I gonna be okay? - Is this place fancy? - Nah, you're fine.
'Cause you could swing by my place so I could use the bathroom, grab a jacket.
Uh, actually, no.
They're kind of weird about being on time.
So, uh Hey, look, I got an extra suit in the trunk.
If it gets chilly by the ocean, you just wear my jacket.
Ooh, it's by the ocean! Oh! All right, all right! No more hints, okay? It'll ruin the surprise.
Anyway, we'll be there in no time.
I really have to pee.
Terry, I'm not kidding.
I'm really -- I'm gonna need a bathroom.
Well, there must be an accident up here or something.
Could you maybe take the next exit? Cutting it pretty close if you want to keep our table.
You know what? Maybe -- maybe I should try the surface streets.
You know, I could probably take, uh, Pico, huh? Well, whatever you do, could you do it kind of fast? Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, Pico's probably the way to go.
Guess Pico wasn't the way to go.
Okay, this isn't funny.
I really -- I have to pee now.
Just -- just hang on.
I'm hanging.
I'm hanging on.
I tell you what.
Can you just, uh -- can you call the restaurant and tell them we're gonna be late? No, Terry, I can't.
I can't.
The number is in there, okay? I think the hostess' name is Rachel.
Seriously, seriously -- I need you to pull over to a -- I don't know -- a coffee shop, or a gas station -- anything, something, I have no idea what's around here.
I really don't.
You know what? Just -- why don't you turn around and take me home? I'm sure we can get to the restaurant.
We haven't moved in 10 minutes.
It's just easier to turn around.
- Can you just hang on?! - Forget the restaurant, Terry! I don't care about the restaurant! I have to pee! Take me home now! Wha-- Terry, hurry, come on.
Oh! I need my keys! I need my keys! I got 'em.
I got 'em.
Okay.
I'll get it.
Terry, come on, come on.
Hurry.
Terry, hurry.
Come on.
Oh.
Okay.
Got it.
Okay.
Come on, come on, come on.
Oh, I told you this lock was sticky.
I'm -- I'm peeing right now.
Shit.
Oh, that's just I just peed my pants.
Oh, hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey, uh We're technically closed, but I guess I can make an exception.
Yeah, you know, I was in the neighborhood, so So, uh, you decide to go for that new phone after all? No.
See, actually, I really need the money.
It was a big bet.
Yeah, well, I told you I'm good for it.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
It's just, uh, you know, the policy -- you bet, and, uh Yeah, look, I-I get it, man.
You don't know me.
You need some collateral.
So, uh, how about I set you up with some stuff in the meantime? You can take a hands-free set for your phone.
Or maybe a camera charger or something? - Yeah, no, no.
- Look around.
- You can take whatever - That's not the policy.
Uh, hey, I'm sorry.
You just You're putting me in a bad spot here.
I-I'm sorry.
You know, why don't you put me on a payment plan or something like that? I can't do that, no.
Listen, George, I'm kind of going through a whole thing right now, okay, so I-I don't know.
I guess it all kind of got away from me.
Uh Look, I just needed to hit that this one time.
You know, just one more -- one stupid time, you know -- and I would be out of this stupid hole That -- that I'm in now! Like, I -- you know, my wife left me.
She took the kids.
I'm staying in this piece-of-shit apartment.
My kids are 7 and 8.
I feel like a total asshole! I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't have it.
I don't have it.
I don't have it.
I'm sorry.
I don't know what to say.
I'm sorry.
I just -- Okay.
It's okay.
Locksmith's gonna be here in a few minutes, so Okay.
I called like four different guys, you know? I got a lot of voicemail.
Guess everybody's locked out tonight, huh? Thanks for the pants.
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry.
This was not how this was supposed to go.
No? No.
I just -- I just really want this to work.
It is working.
I mean, not, you know, this whole thing, but Look I know that I Took off on you.
And I would give anything to go back in time and not do that.
But the thing is, I'm here now.
And I'm not going anywhere.
So we don't have to, you know, push or force anything.
We can take it slow and just enjoy each other 'cause We're together now.
I don't want to take it slow.
I've been taking it slow for 50 years.
I always take it slow, and it always just -- it goes away, you know? I've spent my adult life "Not being in a place where I'm looking for something serious," "Not defining things right now," and you know what? UmI'm done.
So let's define things right now.
Let's move in together.
Okay.
Let's move into my place, though, 'cause your place sucks.
- Let's do this quick.
- No problem.
Here's $3,500 for those four and $200 for you.
Nice doing business with you, Donny.
I know it is.
I'll pay it back.
It really was just a mistake.
I know, Bruce.
I know.
But you understand, we have to, um That's not good enough.
Look, I'm so sorry.
I-I know.
I know.
Look, the guys don't have to know.
We'll tell them you, um Chose to take early retirement.
It was so stupid.
I I mean, I was just trying to pay myself a little fee.
Oh, don't give me that horse shit! 30 years together.
Get your ass out the door! Go on, get out! What, should I just call Manfro directly? No, no.
Don't call him.
Don't tell him See, that's what I'm saying.
He's not doing well right now.
So he's gonna shut down the whole operation.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, the, uh, the stress, you know -- doesn't want any of it.
Yeah, I-I get it.
He's got a whole different thing going on now.
All right, so, uh All right.
Well, uh Take care, Joe.
Yeah, okay, you too.
I'm thinking about heading out to Lake Havasu.
Float around, fish a little, drink a little Drink a little more.
Take it easy.
Boys! Come on! Dinner's gonna be ready in 10 minutes! Hey.
What's up? I'm -- Weird Joe, you're off the hook.
No more dog-walking for you.
Guess who's back in the picture.
Jennifer.
- The stripper? - "Dancer.
" A little respect.
Yeah, well, congratulations.
So, um, you feeling all right? Well, yeah.
There's a stripper coming over.
"Dancer.
" Shit.
I'll get it.
Yeah, so, anyway, I'm almost to the point where I could haul my hairless, skinny ass around the block.
Well, that's good.
That's -- really, that's great.
You did me a big favor, so thanks.
You're a good guy, Joe.
Come here.
Come here.
Oh, no! Still? Terry, hurry, come on.
Good God.
We were thinking of changing the name of our band to "Free Money.
" Lame.
No, no, it's good because then we can make posters that say, "Free Money -- Saturday night!" That's lame.
No.
It's a joke.
You don't get it.
I get it.
Then admit that it's genius.
Dad, you're not actually gonna let him do that, are you? Well, I'm not gonna stand in the way of genius.
Burn! Burn! You got burned, girl! Do this.
Oh, yeah.
You are the lamest father/son combo ever.
You got that right.
Mostly me, though.
Amen.
Mm, if we don't do "Free Money," we were thinking, "Free Beer.
" Yeah, no.
I'm done.
So let's define things right now.
Let's move in together.
Okay.
Ooh.
Oh, man.