Mulligan (2023) s02e10 Episode Script

1
[whimsical music playing]
[Jeremy sighs]
Well, that got did.
Yeah, and it's never getting did
ever again.
[dramatic music plays]
- What?
- Jesus, Braun, there you are.
We're getting out of this dump.
Oh, and we hate England now.
So if you see Jeremy, slap him.
Slap him and spit on him,
and then stomp his crotch!
[Jeremy] Mm-hmm.
Oh, that guy makes me so mad!
I just wanna stab these curtains! [grunts]
[Dr. Braun gasps]
- [Jeremy grunts]
- [Dr. Braun gasps]
When did you move?
Farrah, last night was Magikarp.
Did you say "Magikarp"?
My very favorite Pokémon character.
But I have to admit, you were right.
That doing role-play with the swim diapers
you found in here was weird?
No, I quite enjoyed Soggy Baby.
You were right that I need an Elizabeth
to put my life in order.
So will you marry me and be my queen?
Good Lord, no. Are you crazy?
No more than anyone
whose grandmother is his first cousin.
- Don't call me.
- [door slams]
[Jeremy] Mmm.
- [whimsical music playing]
- Ugh, gross.
[Bobzorb speaking Cardibean]
Speak English
in case someone overhears us.
I can't believe you survived, General.
After we were separated,
I feared the worst.
I've been hiding here in the woods,
living off garbage and animal scat.
And when that ran out, I had no choice
but to loot a Boston Market.
Well, at least you have your freedom.
I was captured by,
like, so many Earth soldiers.
[in Cardibean] Ah, the throne
of Earth's most powerful creature.
Shall be a toilet for my butt!
[Bobzorb screams]
[in English] Whoa! Lucy,
we're on the set
of the movie White House Down.
So, yeah
- [Matty] Axie, where are you?
- [Bobzorb grunts]
- Dude, who were you talking to?
- No one.
There's just an echo here.
Here, here…
Cool! I love echos!
Os, os, os…
[laughs] Let's do this for a long time.
Or let's go over here
where there is no echo.
Ugh, whatever. I'm sick of this place.
So let's make like everyone else
at a party when I arrive,
and leave.
How dare he speak to you like that?
You're a Cardibean general.
Yes. Well, I…
tolerate their insolence only to lull them
into a false sense of security.
So you can slaughter them all.
Um, I wish, but the humans
defeated our armada.
They are vicious.
They'll throw that speedball by you.
Make you look like a fool.
Anything but that.
Please tell me you have a plan, General.
Just follow me back to Washington.
We'll find a place for you to hide
while we plot our bloody revenge
on the humans, or whatever.
[in Cardibean] Okay, sounds good.
[in English]
Sorry, I forgot. No Cardibean.
[theme music playing]
[whimsical music playing]
[Matty] Ladies and gentlemen
of the Mulligan Cabinet,
these are dark times for America.
But when the night is darkest,
is usually when Skinemax comes on.
And as long as I have
my most trusted advisors…
Damn it! I knew I shouldn't have
backed into the room for dramatic effect.
[Lucy] Sorry, I'm late.
Can you start over, but without,
I'm assuming, the Red Sox parts?
I hadn't gotten there yet.
Where is everybody?
Well, Mr. LaMarr quit,
Wanda and Gary can't be
in the same room together anymore,
and General Scarpaccio has a rash
from sleeping
in his wet bathing suit at camp.
And Simon and Levine are probably too busy
walking around with their hands
in each other's back pockets.
You know she moved in?
Already.
[Simon grunts, groans]
Boy, the only other time
I've ever lived with a woman
was when my grandmother got dementia
and thought I was her dead husband.
She didn't treat him well.
I certainly hope she's dead
because I am not sharing you.
Boop.
My hands are full, sweetie,
will you boop your nose for me?
Mm-boop.
What's Axatrax's excuse?
Maybe he's got a girlfriend too.
[all laugh]
Good one.
[Axatrax grunting]
[Bobzorb] Oh, Axatrax…
I just turned female, you know?
Uh, ya think?
Oops, let me get that.
See anything you like?
[in Cardibean] Bobzorb, no. If I am missing for too long,
the humans will get suspicious.
[in English]
No. This is how we defeat the humans.
Defeat the mighty humans?
[chuckles nervously]
No. There's only two of us.
Exactly. There's two of us.
Which means we can make more.
You fertilize my eggs,
our offspring reproduce,
and we'll have thousands
of deeply inbred killing machines
with your eyes.
That actually could work.
I guess I'd given up
on ever being a father.
I always smashed my eggs after mating
because of my career.
Work-life balance is hard in Space Army,
but you can have it all.
Kids, a coal-rich planet
scorched of all life,
and this to come home to.
[screams]
Oh.
[in Cardibean] We'll discuss this later.
[dramatic music playing]
[Axatrax grunts]
Some of us are trying
to die with dignity here, Axatrax.
Sorry! Have fun!
This is so unprofessional.
And I lived on the school bus I drove.
Well, sir, without Mr. LaMarr,
maybe we can
make some actual progress here.
We all know
how fragile the electrical grid is
Oh my God, again with electricity?
Boring!
I'm just saying wind power could…
[horse neighing]
I bring the mail.
Hyah!
Ooh, this looks like an invitation.
If it's a boat giveaway,
that's just a cop trick.
Farrah, you're getting married?
To King Jeremy?
No! What the hell is he thinking?
Hold up.
Braun, you and…?
- Yoko!
- Polo!
You're the reason
Jeremy bailed on me the other night!
Well, maybe. But that's over.
- You're over! You're fired.
- [Dr. Braun] What?
[Matty] I'm putting you on the list.
Oh, screw this.
Oh boy.
Matty, without Mr. LaMarr,
Simon, or Farrah
We're way better off.
Exactly.
I mean, Braun was the one who said
we didn't need this thing in here.
[Matty pants, grunts]
- [Matty groans]
- [Lucy sighs]
- [Dr. Braun grunts]
- Oh.
- What the hell is your problem?
- Pills.
I told you "no," man.
We have nothing in common,
and in bed, you kept asking,
"How's this for some sex?"
And you never answered.
I don't want to be your queen.
All I want is a laboratory
because the president took mine away
thanks to you.
Well, if one married us,
one wouldn't need to work.
I want to work.
I want to make the world better.
And the bar is low.
The only soap left is Irish Spring.
That's the name of a soap?
Have you ever
been to Ireland in the spring
when the bogs unfreeze?
But I can't get anything done
because Matty won't even
let me build wind turbines.
He says he's afraid of the wind
because he's, quote,
"Seen the movie, Twister."
And you
Oh, don't lump me in with Matthew.
After all, the United Kingdom
would love some wind turbines.
Really?
President Mulligan
just cut off the power here
because I left his big dance
to partake in a mambo of a more…
horizontal variety.
Yes, you kept saying that at the time.
And you're welcome to use
the laboratory in the basement.
- The Kingsmen had an office here.
- I don't know what that is.
Well, imagine James Bond,
but somehow even more sexually childish.
So there's a lab,
and you won't have any opinions
about how I use it?
Well, what would I base them on?
At uni, I studied Classical Statuary
with a concentration in Nips.
Okay.
But you need to tell people
we are not getting married.
I most certainly will.
- On Her Majesty's Day of Opposites.
- [whimsical music playing]
- [Simon grunts]
- Oh, thank goodness you're here.
Well, not for long.
I'm just grabbing Warren Harding's copy
of The Kama Sutra for The Tubby Gentleman.
No, don't go.
Without you and Farrah and Mr. LaMarr,
it's just me and Matty in charge.
And he's still stuck in the ceiling
'cause I couldn't understand
- the ladder instructions.
- Yeesh.
He says we have to prove
we don't need anyone's help
by doing something epic
that will knock everyone's socks off
during a sock shortage.
Yeah. Sorry, but I have to get back
to the old ball-chain.
I think you mean "ball and chain."
Lucy, I do not.
You don't have to
get back to anything, mister.
Yeah, I followed you here.
And I find you with another woman?
We were just talking.
And I don't see him as a man.
He's like a big baked potato
a wizard brought to life.
- Thank you, Lucy.
- I won't let you out of my sight anymore.
Let's go.
And don't you dare look at his tushie
and imagine it sitting on a cake,
you creep.
[Lucy sighs]
I just thought of the perfect thing.
What does America do better than anyone?
Laser Floyd!
- [Matty laughs] Ah!
- [Lucy inhales sharply]
[whimsical music playing]
[house music playing faintly]
[screw squeaking]
- [house music playing faintly]
- [lights crackle]
[bicycle bell rings]
Much like my pants,
America is coming apart at the seams.
Laser Floyd blew out the whole power grid,
so now only that country
where the smart lady went has electricity.
What a mess.
Yeah? Well, your bike riding is…
Aw, it's excellent. Dammit!
I wish I could hate you, Vance Barry!
People are so mad
they're breaking off
into their own countries.
[Fabia grunts]
We make-a the new Italia.
Garbage strike! [grunts]
And now an editorial.
With everybody gone,
Matty and Lucy don't have what it takes
to run the country.
And now a retraction.
I'm sorry I said that.
I don't like being mean.
[suspenseful music playing]
[Bobzorb grumbling]
Oh, this asbestos
will make perfect nesting material.
If I don't eat it all first.
[chomps, crunches]
Oh, I am bad.
- Axatrax, I am trying to concentrate.
- [Bobzorb gasps]
What's with the get-up?
You look like one of them
American Gladiators.
Nitro, perhaps. Or Malibu. Titan, maybe?
Or Zap? Thunder is a possibility
Please don't hurt me, mighty human.
I'll ingest your endo-phallus.
Wake me up and put me to bed!
You're not Axatrax.
[LaMarr yelps]
[suspenseful music playing]
Oh, I'm gonna torture the crap out of you.
[kids chanting] Kid Nation! Kid Nation!
Matty, everyone's bailing on America.
What are we gonna do?
We're gonna unite this country.
Just like Lincoln.
Their ad campaign
with Matthew McConaughey?
Everyone hated that.
We just need a common enemy.
Then I can kick its ass
and remind everyone
why they cheered
for me to be president in the first place.
So you're gonna, like,
invent someone for everybody to be mad at?
Matty, we have enough real problems,
like
King Kong! We're doing a King Kong!
[Kojo roars]
[mutters] Why would I want a human wife?!
Kojo says he didn't kidnap Lucy.
Okay, no fair.
I didn't know that thing could talk.
[all] Boo.
Lucy's hiding over here in the bushes.
She was in on it!
[Lucy sighs]
[dirt rustling]
Greetings.
Things not going so great
in the Overworld?
Why not try life in the sewers?
With Urgmel.
[indistinct chatter]
Aw.
[In Cardibean]
I like living on Earth.
I'm so much more free here! And I don't want all the humans to die,
but I do want to be a father. Oh what a bind I'm in!
[LaMarr yelling]
[LaMarr laughing]
Hang on, y'all melted Bernie Sanders?
Yes.
See, first, we brought him
before the death panel.
I told him that was gonna happen.
Axatrax.
I was just getting to know
your boon companion here.
- How did you?
- I was out looking for nesting materials.
Because guess what!
Ovulating!
- And I thought Bob here was you.
- Oh, he wishes.
But before he got to torture-atin' me…
[mechanical whirring]
[Bobzorb laughs maliciously]
Is this a dedicated room just for torture?
Is that legal where y'all come from?
Of course. This is war.
Well, I think that's wonderful.
Now what about civilian casualties?
What about them?
Those are the second-best casualties.
[LaMarr] So we got to talking,
and it turns out your society
sounds an awful lot like the America
I've been trying to drag us back to.
Everything runs on coal,
it's ruled by a small group
of ethnically pure elders,
there's a hive mind
that enforces conformity,
and, best of all, no soccer whatsoever.
And now you two are friends?
Thick as thieves.
Bob here told me about your plan
to kill all the other humans.
And, well, count me in.
I gave those people everything,
and they laughed at me.
They are mean and unpatriotic and rude,
so why should I be the one to die?
It should be them folks out there.
They should die.
I like him.
He will make an excellent addition
to our zoo.
Oh, go on now.
You sure had me fooled, Axatrax.
I was almost convinced you'd gone native.
But here you are, hiding Bobzorb,
plotting to build an army…
Speaking of which, I am ready to pop.
Shall we enter the Bang Zone?
Build that army, boys! Get to it.
[Axatrax gulps]
- [Axatrax] Oh!
- Oh, Kragnorp.
[squelches]
[Axatrax vomiting]
Fellas, please.
Let me get out of the room first.
[vacuum whirring]
[Jeremy grunts]
What a productive morning.
I reinvented penicillin,
and I made Clippy real.
- [Clippy] Anyone writing a letter?
- [Jeremy] No, not at the moment.
- Not now, buddy. We talked about this.
- [Clippy] Oh.
And thank you for not doing anything
to distract me while I worked.
That's the beauty
of this arrangement, Farrah.
- See, I don't do anything.
- [joyful music playing]
You'll do everything ♪
As I do not-a-thing ♪
Cause naught means anything to me ♪
You could do projects big and small ♪
Whilst I do bugger-all ♪
I can't even be arsed
To think of a rhyme ♪
Could I start a school? ♪
Anything ♪
Convert the trash to fuel? ♪
Anything ♪
Grow the foods we lack? ♪
Anything ♪
Bring Real Housewives back? ♪
Was that a telly program? ♪
You'll do everything ♪
Whilst I'm off frolicking ♪
Then I take everything ♪
Everything in here… ♪
- Oh, right, you're the worst.
- [gulps]
But…
I could do so many things ♪
With no one meddling ♪
While you do the silly things you do ♪
We'd trade wedding rings ♪
That won't be happening ♪
I don't feel anything for you ♪
I could grow on you ♪
Oh, like mold will do? ♪
I could help with chores ♪
That's what those are for ♪
[Clippy] Are you revising your resume? ♪
We're obviously singing.
What about this, Clippy,
looks like a resume?
Yes, I'd do everything ♪
Whilst I do not-a-thing ♪
And your kids live just like kings ♪
But camp was just a fling ♪
- Although I like to sing with you ♪
- Although I like to sing with you ♪
So you'll stay?
As your employee.
[music crescendos]
[Matty scoffs]
Matthew, I need your help.
- Dude, what is that smell?
- It's my ejaculate.
I like it. Wait, what?
While I destroy these, you need to go kill
the alien who birthed them.
- There's an alien to kill?
- [Axatrax grunts]
That's, like, my thing!
Oh, where were you an hour ago?
Bobzorb is trying to make an army.
And LaMarr is helping him.
Oh my God.
Wait, whose side are you on?
Why'd you fertilize his eggs?
And why does it smell so good?
I didn't know what to do!
But I choose Earth, okay?
Because I don't wanna go back to a planet
that reminds Cartwright LaMarr
of the country his grandpappy
fought the Union Army to preserve.
This is my home and we have to save it.
I'm gonna say something so cool
when I kill him,
like, "Get jazzy, greenzo,
'cause big Matty's got some, uh "
Just get a weapon, go to the mothership,
and kill Bobzorb
while he's naked and vulnerable.
And I know just the weapon.
[action music plays]
I'm sure I'll have
another chance to be a father.
Or a mother.
Or one of those lucky Cardibeans
who switch right
in between Mother's Day and Father's Day.
'Cause two gifts!
[sighs]
[grunting]
- [whimsical music playing]
- Sharon?
Who is she? Who is Lindsey?
Sharon, I don't know anyone named
Oh, Lindsey Graham.
I'm researching a book on politicians
who were driven insane by syphilis.
Turns out, he wasn't.
No one knows what happened to that guy.
Oh, I'm sorry, Simey Bear.
I'm just so scared I'm gonna lose you.
Aw.
Huh…
[suspenseful music plays]
What?
Farrah is getting married?
Today?
Why did you tear this up?
Because I don't want you
anywhere near that tramp!
She obviously has
downstairs feelings for you, Simon.
She practically threw herself at you
at Camp David.
Oh my God.
Of course.
Trying to come between us to the lake.
The makeup. The visible fart-stifling.
- [Matty] When they got…
- [Dr. Braun grunts]
No. Not today.
I control you.
I'm sorry, Sharon.
I can't do this.
I have to stop that wedding.
- [Sharon groans]
- [Simon grunts]
[muffled] Farrah!
I object to the wedding.
[mascot] Stah makuh funnuh muh, atho!
- Lucy, have you seen Wonderboy?
- That baseball bat with a nail in it?
Yup, Mucy's got an alien to kill.
Oh my God, is that your only move?
Making up something scary
that you're gonna save us from?
No.
And this one's real.
I'm sick of helping you
with all your dumb plans.
- I'm going to Queen Farrah's wedding
- Wait, that's happening?
King Jeremy says it is,
and that if Braun says it's not,
that's just part of their sex play.
She's such a perv.
And after the wedding,
I'm moving to New Asia.
Ugh, Thailand?
Fine, whatever.
It can't just be me and Stephen.
Hello, Lucy. Wanna play Wingspan?
It's a board game about birds.
Maybe.
So yeah,
you can go be a hero
by yourself this time.
- [door shuts]
- No, I can't.
After Kojo, no one'll believe me
if they don't see it.
But everyone's gonna be at the wedding.
I've got to kill Bobzorb at the church.
[Peeping Tom] Sounds like a good plan.
You should change clothes first.
Okay.
- [Peeping Tom] Theo, he's doing it. Hurry.
- [footsteps approaching]
[dramatic music playing]
Everybody retract or dispose of
their detachable sexual organs?
Wha?! The greatest
and most googly of mooglies!
What happened to our eggs?
What happened to our army?
[Bobzorb groans]
Ah! A dingo stole my babies!
In Cardibean, "dingo" means "traitor."
Hey, TOD.
You're looking well.
[TOD-209] Thank you.
Doctor also look well.
Very full of water.
Listen, I know this isn't my lab anymore,
but I need to grab
some important science equipment.
It looks a lot like a pillow
with a picture of Chris Pine taped to it.
- [church bells tolling]
- [TOD-209] Isn't that Doctor's wedding?
Ugh, stupid Jeremy.
No, I'm not getting married.
I mean, working for him is great.
I get so much done.
I get to tuck the kids in at night.
So I can screw them up
with my influence instead of my absence.
[TOD-209] Is every parent's dream.
Then I open a bottle of wine
and watch Real Housewives.
- [bot 1] Throw.
- [bot 2] Slap.
- [bot 1] Spill.
- [bot 2] Bitch.
You did not invite me
to the party for your new single.
[bot 1] Single dropping now.
[upbeat music playing]
Everybody jealous of me ♪
My surgery is good
And my sex is old ♪
[TOD-209] Sound like Doctor
not work for anyone.
Sound like Doctor in charge and actually
happy.
[church bell tolls]
[Bobzorb sniffing]
- [Matty] Dude, there you are.
- Uh
Axatrax, listen, I've got a new plan
for how to kill that other alien.
Yes, it is I, Axatrax. Keep talking.
Will do.
So you know how everyone
is gonna be at the big, royal wedding?
And I mean everybody.
Me, Lucy, Grimes, P.D. Blaze…
Everybody.
So all the humans will be in one place?
Exactly.
So we need to lure Bobzorb there
without his armor.
'Cause, like you said, with his armor,
he could kill us all.
Like, no problem.
Humans are not powerful warriors?
You're a good listener.
Hey, does Bobzorb
know you destroyed his eggs?
No.
But when he finds out,
he'll certainly want to tear out
each and every one of my ani.
Aces.
So you can lure him to the church,
which, as you know, only has one exit.
It'll be a perfect trap.
For him.
- Yes.
- [church bells tolling]
Oh great, the wedding's started.
Just remember, you can't let Bobzorb
know about any of this.
So to be totally clear,
here's the list of things
Bobzorb cannot know.
Everybody's at the church
completely unarmed.
- The church is a kill box.
- Sure.
Humans are no match
for Bobzorb in his exo-armor.
And you, Axatrax, betrayed him
and massacred his children.
You're not gonna forget
any of that, are you?
Not as long as I live.
Which'll be longer than Bobzorb.
Because we're gonna kill him.
Because you betrayed him.
- Okay, see you there!
- [dramatic music plays]
[Simon groans]
Huh?
I'm sorry, sweetie bear,
but D.C. is four-to-one women to men.
Now that I've got you,
I can't ever let you go.
[church bells tolling]
Sharon, I have to stop that wedding.
[Simon grunting]
What are you doing? Stop that.
You… You look like a big worm.
[Simon continues grunting]
Cut it out, you're being weird.
- [Simon grunts]
- [birds chirping]
- [Simon grunting]
- [Sharon] Whoa, whoa!
- [Sharon] No!
- Wait, yes. Peck me.
And peck… the dental floss.
[Simon grunts] Whoo-hoo!
Thank you, birds.
If Farrah and I have a child,
we'll name it Robin!
[squawking] We're grackles, idiot!
[TOD-209] Seamstress protocol completed.
Farrah, I knew you'd come.
Yeah, but you said
you wanted an Elizabeth, right?
Well, Elizabeth is the one in charge.
Exactly. She calls the shots
and gets to name the horses.
Like, "Shadowfox."
No, but you'll get the hang of it.
While your feckless husband
keeps bloody well out of the way.
"Turkish Strangler."
Getting worse, but it's day one.
If you'll have me.
[suspenseful music plays]
Yeah. This could work.
But you need to know
that I don't love you.
- This all started because I was chasing
- Yes, the potato man, I know.
That's what a royal marriage is.
A loveless arrangement
spent pining for someone else
in a nice, big house.
Okay. Let's do this.
Cool.
We are gathered here today
before Dave and all his friends…
[Rabbi] And do you, Ani, take
I'm so happy to be Mrs
I'm DJ D-Sol.
Now welcome for the very first time,
Mr. and Mrs
[TOD-209] TOD remember DJ name?
This so frustrating.
- Yeah, I got a reason to object!
- [crowd groans]
Did I time that right?
In fact, no.
Well, there's an alien
that wants to kill us all,
but I am gonna save you.
[all grumbling]
Yes, this is me dressed up.
But also, no one believes you.
Yeah, you're a liar.
Just like that dingus who tried
to sell everyone those sugar pills.
Simon, I think.
This is pathetic, Matty.
Stop trying to pretend to be a hero.
Matthew, what are you doing?
Uh, the plan we talked about
for a long time on the lawn,
when you looked different and didn't know
any of the stuff we'd already discussed.
- Oh no.
- Oh no.
You moron!
I told you to kill him
while he was still vulnerable!
While who's vulnerable?
- Matty, what did you do?
- [door opens]
- Farrah, wait!
- Simon?
There's something I need to tell you
- [crowd gasps]
- [Simon grunts]
[ominous music playing]
- Bobzorb.
- Bobzorb or maybe Axatrax.
Foolish humans.
Your own Earth president revealed to me
how weak and vulnerable you are.
So thank him before you all die.
[Vance] Thank you, Matty.
Except for little ol' teeny tiny me.
- [all gasp]
- Cartwright LaMarr.
I always knew you'd stab us in the back.
Who the hell are you? I say that.
Y'all thought you could turn this country
into a United Colors of Benetton ad,
with your cancel culture
and your female Ghostbusters,
and your She-Hulk? [laughs]
Hey, brother.
You're interrupting a royal wedding,
which for some reason we,
as a culture, are really into!
- [Rooster yells, groans]
- [bones crack]
[all gasp, scream]
Okay, someone just crapped in my pants.
Simon, I think.
Bobzorb, look, it's been a long day,
and I can see
you're having some big feelings.
Axatrax, you ovicidal dingo.
I will kill you last.
How is that fair?
- [Bobzorb grunts]
- [yelps]
TOD, do something!
[TOD-209] TOD know TOD's name.
- TOD was
- [Bobzorb grunts]
[Tod-209 slurs]
- Oh, yuck.
- [Dr. Braun gasps]
Hoo, if only General Scarpaccio
was here instead of me, Jayson, a kid.
[Bobzorb grunts]
- [humans screaming]
- [Bobzorb grunting]
Of course everything's going wrong.
'Cause you and me were in charge.
No. It's just me, Lucy.
I'm the idiot.
And not the Dostoevsky novel.
You know that?
No, I just said I wasn't that.
I've never even heard of it.
This is all my fault.
You told me not to do
every stupid thing I did that got us here.
Laser Floyd, Kojo…
And remember when I traded the White House
for those magic beans?
And I got it back from Yadda.
Exactly.
I mean, day one, you had the idea
to get smart people to help me.
I thought
we couldn't do this without them,
but maybe I'm a smart people.
[Dr. Braun] Well…
But I need you, too.
Because bravery is just
a helpful kind of stupid.
We got this.
[dramatic music playing]
[Bobzorb laughs maliciously]
No.
I have to live.
For you.
[dramatic music playing]
[egg crackling]
[baby Axatrax] Oh!
Gob-gob!
[tinkling music playing]
[joyful music playing]
[Jeremy] You'll do everything ♪
As I do not-a-thing ♪
'Cause naught means anything to me ♪
You could do projects big and small ♪
Whilst I do bugger-all ♪
I can't even be arsed
To think of a rhyme ♪
[Dr. Braun] Could I start a school? ♪
[Jeremy] Anything ♪
[Dr. Braun] Convert the trash to fuel? ♪
[Jeremy] Anything ♪
[Dr. Braun] Grow the foods we lack? ♪
[Jeremy] Anything ♪
[Dr. Braun]
Bring Real Housewives back? ♪
Yes, I'd do everything ♪
[Jeremy] Whilst I do not-a-thing ♪
And your kids live just like kings ♪
[Dr. Braun] But camp was just a fling ♪
[both]
Although I like to sing with you ♪
[music halts]