Survivor's Remorse (2014) s02e10 Episode Script

Got a date with Allison.
I'm finding out what I can about her.
Let it flow tonight.
Be you.
She gonna find out who you are eventually, and she'll either like it or she won't.
You're exactly the kind of person I should date, because I would try to date you even if I was still in Dorchester with nothing to my name except my name.
You can say that, but you can't know that.
I represent Cam Calloway, and he may be a pro basketball player, but we want him to be more than just a basketball player.
- Reggie Vaughn? - Yes.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Deshauwn May.
- You should be my manager.
- You got a manager.
I got a problem and you know it.
Do you wanna manage Jupiter? I wanna do right by Cam.
I'm already working Ira, Coke, Bao.
This'll just be another thing that I'm working.
Money doesn't make you somebody.
Being somebody makes you somebody.
God has done you, Cam and me pretty good.
What we do with the rest is up to us.
Reg, destiny's callin'.
- This is Reggie.
- Clayton Beckwith here.
I'm so sorry to wake you.
Clayton? Who? What? Where? Jupiter Blackmon was, uh, picked up for shoplifting.
- Shoplifting what? - Marshmallows.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
Why? Well, apparently, he had a hankering for some s'mores.
He's accused of attempting to procure them without providing the grocer with sufficient legal tender.
Did he have any drugs on him? No.
Thankfully his drugs were already inside of him.
But he hasn't taken a piss test yet, and, uh, nobody knows anything.
Okay.
Text me where you are.
I'm on my way.
Don't let him piss in anything unless you're with him and you can see it flush.
Oh, I shall handle his dick as if it were my own.
Don't take that the wrong way.
I'm a happily married man.
So, do lady cops get high? Jupiter, I'm a big fan, but there are 14 cameras watching us right now.
That don't answer my question.
Do cops get high? And that was the moment he stopped hitting on the sergeant.
Good morning.
Or should I say, "Bad middle of the night"? Look, Reg, this was just a misunderstanding that will soon be understood.
Stop talking.
No more talking.
Mr.
Beckwith say he gonna make this go away.
Stop talking now.
He kept his mouth shut when it was important.
I told Jupiter my number in his phone wasn't just for the bad times.
I can't remember the last time someone called me just to say, "Hello, how you doin'?" - I'd like that.
- Hey, I'm gonna do that.
Any time after 8:00.
This'll all be handled very discreetly.
- When you say "handled" - Yes? - How? - Telling you how I handle things would render me indiscreet.
He's gonna keep us all real busy.
Thank you, Clayton.
Don't be alarmed by the size of my invoice.
- Hey.
- Hey, girl.
Just thinking about you as usual.
Where you at? I was off to work when my car broke down, so now I'm at my mechanic's, a man I'm seeing much too much of lately.
- Why didn't you call me? - I'm focused on my car.
- But I can help.
- What do you know about timing belts? Nothing, but I could've got you.
- You're busy.
- I'm never too busy for you.
I'll remind you of that when I call you in the middle of a game.
- I'll come at halftime.
- What if you're out of town? I'll fly out during halftime.
Okay.
What if you get suspended? Chivalry is expensive.
Please.
I've got AAA and they're on it.
- What's wrong with the car? - It's a piece of shit.
It's a piece of shit? Yes, it's a piece of shit.
Well, you wanna borrow one of mine? I got three.
It's just a timing belt.
They'll fix it and I'll be good to go.
Well, can I take you to lunch? That sounds nice, but I'll probably have to work through lunch.
People should not have to work through lunch.
When they don't show up until lunch, they should.
Fine.
Look, I will bring you some lunch, watch you eat it while you work, then I'll wait in the parking lot and take you to dinner.
I like your style, Calloway.
But let me just hit you back once I get to work - and we'll see how things go.
- All right.
Call me if you need me.
I mean, I got the day off.
- Apparently.
- I wish you had the day off, too.
Some things are beyond our control.
- Dah, I hate that.
- Most people do.
- Gotta go.
- Let's make out later.
As long as you floss.
I am in seventh grade.
Not gonna ask what you were thinking, Jupiter, because I'm beginning to realize that thinking for you is like a hibernation mode.
- Thank you.
- Not a compliment.
All's good.
Look, don't go all "angry face.
" My face is gonna do what my face does as long as you keep doing what you do.
- You stole a bag of marshmallows? - I didn't steal 'em.
- I just walked out with 'em.
- Wow.
Now I'm amused.
Please, elaborate.
I didn't get a cart 'cause I wasn't doing a big shop.
But it takes a few things to make a s'mores chocolate, crackers I didn't wanna juggle all that, so I put the marshmallows in my hoodie pocket, but then I realized I had no money.
Elaborate quicker.
So I made the choice to get some money, but I forgot to take the marshmallows out of my hoodie pocket.
See, these hoodie pockets is real deep, and next thing you know, I'm standing outside with something I didn't paid for.
Jupiter, that's called "stealing.
" No see, now, I was high as fuck.
- It was drug-induced negligence.
- Right.
That's better.
Come on, man.
I didn't get charged with stealing.
I was charged with shoplifting.
That's because what you stole was so fuckin' stupid to have stolen, they don't even dignify it with the word "stealing.
" All right.
What can I say? Chewing marshmallows makes me happy.
My mouth gets to do this fun little floaty thing, and it You're like a fuckin' child.
Man, why you gotta be like this? Because this is what a good manager is like.
Like this when situations like this go down.
Like this when things like this bounce me outta bed to bail you out.
You know, you're makin' me feel bad.
Good! It is my intention to make you feel bad right now.
Hey, is your corner boy Deshauwn slingin' any common sense growth hormone? Because you will need to speed up the maturation process before the draft, otherwise you won't get drafted.
Or worse, you'll get drafted by the Raiders.
But why you so mad? It's not like I stole 'em from you.
So you're admitting now that you did, in fact, steal? They were marshmallows! Beckwith's gonna make this go away.
No, no, no.
You are out of "make it go aways.
" All you have left is "control the damage and make it hurt less.
" Jupiter, I'm taking you home, and you're not to say anything to anybody until I tell you what to say, when to say it, and what the sentence construction is.
- But I got a class.
- Jupiter Remember, you said it was important to keep up appearances till before the draft and that if I stay in school and get my degree, my endorsement money will increase because "most Americans love nothing more than an educated, nonthreatening black man"? Jupiter, you are in control of your life.
Nobody else.
You understand me? Class, then home.
But first, car, seat belt and shut up.
Uncle J, you ever been in love? - Say what? - You ever been in love? - Don't ask me that.
- Why? - Don't ask me why.
- Why not? - Don't ask me why not.
- How come? - Because.
- Because why? - Because it's my personal business.
- We're family.
That's all the more reason not to ask why.
Ma, how the hell do you not know if your brother's ever been in love? He didn't just get this way, he's always been this way private.
I like it when we don't talk about nothin' important.
Just laugh.
It's always trouble when we gather in the living room.
Okay, so wait a minute, Unc.
You're saying that love is important.
So you were in love once.
I told you, don't ask me that.
Okay, fine.
I won't ask about love, but is it fair to ask if you had a romantic past when you were my age? Nephew, when I was your age, I fucked a whole busload of bitches.
And I ain't talking about that little short school bus of bitches, I'm talking about that double-decker English-busful of bitches.
Man, my friends loved your uncle.
- Sure did.
- Go, young Unc! Retroactive props, man! Yeah.
You still fuckin' following me.
We're not talking notches or numbers, Unc.
We're talking love.
Real love.
Look, I told you don't ask me about that.
He really likes this Allison girl, and he's never been in love, so he doesn't know if he is.
And we can't tell him what a man feels when he's in love, so he needs a man's perspective.
Uncle J, hypothetically I mean, if was gonna know I was in love, how would I go about finding the answer to that question? Like, the true answer? Have you ever put your face in her ass? 'Cause that's a good indicator.
No, I mean, I like her ass.
I'm talking about the whole girl, man.
If you a man over the age of 12 and you asking another man over the age of 12 if he's been in love, then you in love.
I'm getting up.
Don't follow me.
Goodbye.
Coffee? Jupiter got picked up for shoplifting, Missy.
Beckwith take care of it? This time.
But there will be a next time.
Hell, next time could be very well happening right now.
Well, most professional athletes are spoiled, emotional degenerates.
- Not Cam.
- The reason Cam isn't is you.
Your involvement in his life, your counsel to him you, Reggie Vaughn are the exception to the pro athlete degenerate rule.
Jupiter is a rolling state of emergency, Missy.
- He just needs more of you.
- Oh, Missy To make sure his tinderbox stays bare.
It may be beyond my power.
Now, now.
Buck up, son.
The phrase "putting out fires" was not created in a vacuum.
It comes from good guys like you rolling behind the states of emergency with your fire truck.
Jupiter ain't no tinderbox.
He is a fuckin' inferno.
Like those flames that come out of the smokestacks in New Jersey? An inferno with an endless, renewable supply of kindling and gasoline that makes the drive from Manhattan to Newark Airport smell like the colon of the asshole of the earth.
And it convinces you that God is dead and that the devil is in charge.
Doughnut? I should have never taken him on.
- You're making an impact.
- Mm-mm, it's the other way around.
He crash-landed on me, and now I gotta fix it.
Excuse me.
I heard you girls were so hot, you need to be hosed down.
My eyes! It's in my eyes! Get that motherfucker! Oh, shit! Go, go, go! Get the oh, fuck! No, I don't.
We haven't skinny-dipped.
Yo.
Yo, Reggie, I'm at the dean's office.
I was, um I was wondering if you could if you'd come talk to her with me.
- You make the honor roll? - I did not.
- But can you come down? - Text me the details.
All right.
Dean Sanborn, that is a lovely color on your skin.
Don't let nobody tell you no different.
Beckwith says he spoke to the grocer.
Grocer's gonna say it's a misunderstanding.
- It's going away.
- How much Beckwith pay the grocer? Put it this way he ain't gotta groce too hard from now on.
- Fuck.
- And I just left the dean's office because he got in trouble again.
But I got it under control.
- You sure? - Nope.
Well, why you saying it? Because I promised you that I would.
And I have to and I will.
I just gotta gotta make sure this guy's fuckups don't blend your name with the stupid shit he does.
My name can handle it.
My name's handled plenty of bad press all year.
Don't worry about that.
It's the only thing I'm worried about right now.
I mean, you know, honestly, dude, I think I overstepped.
You know, I I picked the wrong guy for us to represent, man.
I I drug you into a situation that that I shouldn't have.
- I mean fuck.
- Wait.
"Drug" is a word? Like, a real word? - Like, the past tense of "drag"? - I'm not really sure M-Chuck was lighting me up about that, saying that it wasn't.
If a person uses a word and you get what the word meant, - it's a word.
- Amen.
Look, anyway, I drug you into a management business reppin' a kid you should not have your name associated with.
I have a part to play in your life, Cam, and with this shit, I didn't play this part well.
I'm sorry.
I fucked up.
I've never heard you say that.
It's been a goal of mine.
Dude, our bond is strong.
The whole of what we do together is greater than the sum of the parts.
This part, maybe not so good, but it wasn't disastrous.
- Coulda been.
- It coulda, woulda, shoulda.
Shouldn'a.
Could still be.
Let's cut the bait on Jupiter, send him back to Deshauwn.
- You serious? - We'll regroup.
Do better with the next thing that you fuck up.
- Come on.
- Hey, man, I had to.
But we're not giving up on this management business.
Just our first client.
It was a good idea.
A great one.
My boy.
All right, it is your shot.
Don't fuck it up.
You know what? How 'bout I fuck you up with this cue stick? I'ma use this end.
Funny.
We need a big-ass bow.
- You got a purple one? - We can look.
- At this price, you will find.
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
- Damn.
I mean, come on, man.
- You think we stole the money? - No, sir.
Yeah, 'cause I can't believe my nephew got all this money, either.
We didn't steal it.
We did it the right way.
We sold drugs for it.
- All right, Unc, ease up on him.
- Yes, we sold drugs And I know a cokehead when I see one.
- Oh, my - And you are one.
- No.
No, no.
- Yes, yes, yes.
- No, no.
- Listen, does this look real familiar to you? Bow - bow-bow-bow bow - Unc! Okay.
Don't run the car until you get the purple bow.
Keep your eyes closed.
- Okay.
- All right? I got you something.
You couldn't give it to me inside? Uh, no.
It wouldn't fit through the door.
What? What is it? Hang on, you'll see.
All right, open 'em.
Yeah, girl! How 'bout it? You bought me a Jeep Cherokee? That is a Cadillac Escalade! You bought me a Cadillac Escalade? Yes! No more timing belt problems now.
Wow! Oh, my God.
- Do you like it? - How could I not? - Do you love it? - It's amazing.
Look, I know I can't park it here.
There's probably an ambulance gonna come through with some guy who's got 90 seconds to live, so I'ma pull it right over here, okay? All right.
I'll tell everyone that I'll be a minute, - and then I'll meet you.
- Okay.
Okay.
Cam, this is very sweet.
And very tricked out.
It's fully loaded.
Check out the interior.
Cam, this car is worth more than I make in a year.
Yeah.
It's pretty dope, ain't it? You don't need to spend your money on me.
No, that's what the money is for to make the people that I care about happy.
And yeah, you don't look happy.
I am happy, and I'm so thankful.
And this is such a nice gift.
But I don't know how to say this without sounding ungrateful but I can't accept this car.
Did you just say no to a car? You said you needed a car, right? Well, here it is, bought and paid for.
You said it yourself you can't control everything.
You cannot control what I buy you.
- Cam, it's very sweet.
- Get in the car and you'll see how sweet it is.
Allison okay, I know it's a big statement, and I I hear you about the salary thing.
I'm not trying to "big time" you here.
I'm just trying to make you a part of the big time.
Because it's fun, you know? I can and I like you.
Like, I really like you.
I like you, too.
Gifts come to people, and you gotta accept that you're worthy of a gift.
You're not in charge of how God answers prayers.
I'm just answering a prayer.
Oh, so you're a messenger from God? Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Hi, I'm Cam.
Not to be confused with Gabriel.
I can't.
Come on, dude! What am I supposed to do with this? I already drove it off the lot.
It's already depreciated.
- Isn't there a lemon law? - For lemons.
This isn't a lemon.
It's very clearly not a lemon.
Cam, I know you don't understand, but I'm sorry.
I'll tell you what I do understand.
That not completely understanding is a part of the spell.
I can't believe you turned down a car.
No one in America has ever turned down a car.
Can I buy you a horse? Let's save a horse before it goes to the glue factory.
We'll talk about it.
So she turned down a free car? A free Escalade.
That means she fuckin' someone else.
No, I just blew this one.
Wait.
She's a she-male? Not blown as in "blown," blown as in "I messed up.
" I misevaluated, misgauged.
It was a mistake.
I'm telling you, this girl's different.
By "different," you mean "stupid"? No, just not comfortable with big gifts.
Yeah, well, I am.
This here's mine.
How many trucks you need, greedy-ass motherfucker? Yeah.
We're sharing this.
You know, I think I just came on too strong.
Look, I told you, man, love'll fuck you up.
A woman don't know what to do with a man when he loves her full-on.
Well, you didn't tell me that.
I did in between the lines.
How you gonna know what her reaction would be? Most bitches would be humping you in the back seat, hoping you knock 'em up.
- Well, she didn't.
- 'Cause she's humpin' somebody else.
Well, you did a nice thing, baby.
And you don't have to feel bad about it.
I don't feel bad, I just you know, I like her.
Well, you don't have to say it with a car, just say it.
Marry her, and the cars will come.
And trust me, she will not be turning 'em down.
She'll be like, "Cameron, when is the lease up on the Maybach? It's far too long and it barely fits in the garage.
" Right? Oh, there she is.
Don't tell her I said that.
- Hi.
- Hey, Allison.
I wanna thank you for turning down that car.
I know, it seems ungrateful.
Seems principled.
You're a principled girl.
- Ma, she's driving a death trap.
- Mary Charles! It's the truth.
Come on, everybody knows it.
Do you have to say every fuckin' thing that comes to your lips? She says "principled," I say "stupid.
" - Shut up! - Guys! Guys! I am sorry about them.
Being with me means being with them sometimes.
I can handle it.
But look, I thought about it and I understand why you don't want the car as a gift, you know, given how little time we've known each other.
That was a little overeager on my part, and I apologize.
I mean, I apologize for giving you a world-class vehicle.
You don't have to apologize.
Yeah, but, you know, I wanted you to know that knowing you well, getting to know you has been the best thing that's ever happened to me.
There it is.
Didn't you just become a multimillionaire, like, six months ago? Look at this place.
I mean, I repeat that statement.
Money don't buy happiness.
Apparently, it can't even drive the happiness to work.
I mean, the happiness is the happiness.
I don't even know what I'm saying.
I just like you for you, and I want you to like me for me.
But that's all I'm gonna say.
I'm gonna shut up.
You are liked for you.
You wanna go get something to eat? I'm paying.
You can't not let me pay.
Sure.
But can you follow me to my mechanic's first? - He's gonna try to fix it by the morning.
- Okay.
Hey, you sure you don't want this car? Just a ride to my mechanic's garage.
With all due respect, take the car, bitch.
- My nephew's rich! - Yeah, a car for a rich guy is like a nice dinner for a normal guy.
All right, all.
We gonna get some barbecue.
First, we gotta drop off Allison's car.
Are you sure you don't wanna drive the Escalade just once? - No, I'll take my car.
- No, me and Uncle J will take your car.
You drive the gift not taken.
Okay.
Mm-mm-mm! Don't you let her out of your sight.
- All right, Unc.
- Yeah.
Have you hit that yet? Go for it! Go for it! Hey, don't let 'em put that move on you! Uh-oh, he's gonna move on oh! - There we go.
- Deshauwn? Hey, stand down, background dancers.
- The fuck you doin'? - Hands up, N-word! Did you just say, "Hands up, N-word"? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, I did.
Why? I mean, not the "hands up" part, but the "N-word" thing.
Man, I'm tryin' to improve my language.
N-word's a divisive word.
Read yourself some Ta-Nehisi Coates.
Right on.
N-word, the fuck you doin'?! It just don't feel the same.
Oh, oh, you strapped, motherfucker? No, no, no, no, no.
It's a contract.
A contract between me and Jupiter.
I am ripping it up.
- Keep the gun on him, Cho Cho.
- Yeah.
- Okay, Cho is it Cho Cho? - Cho Cho, that's right.
Okay, please, Cho Cho.
Lower your weapon.
I come with respect and apology in hand.
I don't see no apology.
- What, you write it down? - No, but I ain't strapped.
How we know you ain't got no snipers? I'm a one-man operation, okay? Deshauwn, I am out of the Jupiter game.
I fucked up.
Never should've came between two old friends.
You deserve every percentage of everything.
I offer you my deepest apologies and my sincerest regrets.
Your client, once again your client.
And with, uh - Cho Cho.
- Cho Cho's blessing, I go in peace.
If there's ever anything I can do for you in the future, just let me know.
Well, we can settle for a simple "You're better than me, Deshauwn.
" If you can't decipher that that's essentially what I'm saying, - you ain't better than me.
- Do me a favor.
- Lose my number.
- Never had your number, Deshauwn.
- Well, don't try to get it later! - Respect.
Gentlemen - Want me to pop him one? - Yeah, put one in the air.
Oh! I said air, not ear! N-word! This is Reggie.
Hey, Reggie, it's Tom Werner.
Hey, Tom.
Listen, I really liked the way - you handled yourself during that card game.
- Thanks, Tom.
Fenway Sports Group is thinking about buying a hockey team.
What do you know about hockey? - Nothing.
- That's perfect.
When we bought Liverpool, most people thought I didn't know much about soccer.
Some people think I still don't.
Listen, I'm coming down to Atlanta next week.
I think we should have lunch and we can talk about getting into business together.
Sure thing, Tom.
Let me know.
All right.
See ya, Reggie.
Hey, Allison, you see your Romeo Cam on the cover of "Slam"? You know, I was gonna name him Romeo, - and now he is one.
- Well, he is handsome.
- He takes a good picture.
- Well, you look like you take a good picture.
- You're hot.
- Chuck! Don't even.
What? A girl can't tell the truth anymore? Look, she's my kinda hot.
She's not your kinda hot.
What does that mean, "your kinda hot, not my kinda hot"? - It means she's my girl.
- But she's universally hot.
Okay, and you should universally shut the fuck up.
- Uncle J! - Yes, it hurts.
- Julius Julius - Hello? - There's been an accident.
- There's my sis right there.
Mm-hmm.
Who that tasty bitch? That's Allison, Unc.
You met her.
She gonna take the Cadillac now.
Julius, listen.
Listen to me, baby.
Hold my hand, okay? Hold my hold my hand.
I did a lot of stupid shit in my life.
Hang in there, man.
Help is coming.
- No, it ain't.
- It's coming, baby.
I wish I believed in God.
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