The Adventures Of Puss In Boots (2015) s02e10 Episode Script
Si
El Gato! 2x10 - "Si" He did it! Ja.
Ha! "Puss in Boots is the best.
He's also very handsome.
" It doesn't rhyme but I don't care.
I feel this thing inside me like I do not hate him so much anymore.
Hey.
What's all the hubbub? Oh, that wonderful Puss in the Boots has restored the protective spell of San Lorenzo.
Whoa! Pickles for everyone! On the house.
Look! It's him.
Friends, I, Puss in Boots, have restored the protective spell of San Lorenzo at long last.
In fulfilling my promise, I have become the greatest legend in the history of legends.
Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Three cheers for Puss! Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! - Hip hip - Hooray! Babieca, you are a unicorn again! That's right.
First I wasn't, then I was.
Then I wasn't again, and now I am again.
Hey, look! That looks just like me.
Sure does.
Now, do you wanna meet the man in the moon? You bet I do.
This is the greatest day of my life! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! - Puss! - Hm? Uh Oh, yes, yes, it was like I was saying, today will be the day that I fulfill my promise and finally restore the protective spell of San Lorenzo.
Ha! We have heard that before.
Yes, only today, it is true.
Artephius! The final piece of missing treasure.
Yes, my lord.
Are you ready to witness my greatest act of heroism ever? Heroism? You are just fixing the problem you created.
Please.
Hold your applause until after his heroic deed.
No, Uli.
Señora Zapata is right.
Breaking San Lorenzo's spell was the greatest mistake I ever made, and I will bear that burden until I set it right.
Which I will do! Now! O mighty Mage Sino, we have returned your treasure.
The debt is paid.
Sincerely, Puss in Boots.
Shouldn't something happen? Oh, you bet.
When all the treasure is returned, that should turn Sino's eye from angry red to pretty blue.
Hm.
Maybe if I just There.
Hey! Tall creepy statue! Look! The last piece of treasure! Now, change your eye back to blue! One moment.
Not to worry.
Maybe the statue is broken.
I just do not understand.
Why am I being punished? - We did everything we were supposed to.
- Mm-hmm.
I swore a sacred vow to protect San Lorenzo and return her to her former glory.
And I intend to do so.
Eh.
Your heart is in the right place.
Yes, of course it is.
This town and the people in it - are all that matters to me.
- Ow! Also, quick question, what suits a Statue Me better, marble or obsidian? Marble is more durable, but obsidian is more dramatic.
Hey! Whee! A thought just occurred to me.
Maybe the orb wasn't the last piece of missing treasure.
Maybe there's more.
No, no.
I refuse to believe that.
No more treasure.
Yeah, well, there must be more treasure out there.
It's a shame too, because the scroll spoke of a great doom Ow! that would coincide with the eclipse, which is only three days away.
Well, then.
If there is treasure to be found, I will find it at once.
I will set things right if it is the last thing I do.
That's the spirit! Then they will build me a statue so grand, people will do the bathroom in their pants when they see it.
Finish translating that spell at once.
By the time you have completed your task, I will have found the last of the missing treasure.
Ow! Toby, what are you doing? Helping you read through the treasure list-y thing.
'Cause I'm a better helper than Uli.
That is not how a squire helps his knight with his reading.
- Oh, really? - Ja.
This is how it is done.
- I'm reading harder, Puss.
- Nein.
I am.
That is enough! Both of you! Time out, now! I apologize, Herr Boots, but I am just so excited you are so close to fulfilling your destiny.
Yeah, what he said.
But better.
Not close enough, I'm afraid.
This inventory will take forever to get through.
Unless Whoa! Unless what? No, it is too dangerous.
But I thought nothing was too dangerous for Herr Boots.
True.
But I warn you, this could kill us all.
What are you gonna do? I am going to employ an ancient secret technique I learned from the mysterious monks in the Far East.
It is known as speed reading.
The miracles never stop mit you.
Oh.
Puss! Is he dead? Felina! The final piece of treasure.
I know what it is.
What is it? Is it bacon? It is a single gold coin.
One I recognize for its strange date: 1829, hundreds of years in the future.
And this future coin and I have a past.
It is fitting that the key to restoring the spell is the same piece of treasure that broke the spell when someone whose name I cannot recall took it as a souvenir.
Hmm I wonder what happened to that coin.
1829! At last, I have found the magical coin from the future that is the final piece of my latest, very much not-insane plot to rule the world.
And to think, they called me crazy.
They're the crazy ones! Oh! I am so excited to discover the coin's whereabouts.
Where do you think it is? Why, it probably ended up someplace harmless, like inside a walnut, or atop a friendly snail's shell or Huh? The Duchess' evil lair.
Seriously, what is it with the Duchess and lightning? - Ha.
She is no match for you.
- No match! Your muscles are like mountain boulders.
I am a rock! Your hands are like deadly serpents.
Your eyes, like jade pools gently lapping at the feet on a luxurious holiday.
What was that last part? Ooh.
It was probably the wind.
Let's go.
All right, we go in, grab the coin, and hurry home.
Und then they build your statue? Yes! Tell me, do you think this new design is too garish? It is more beautiful than heaven.
Good.
On three.
Uno, dos, three! Whoa! Wow, what? Who dares enter my Oh, it's you.
Well, let's get this over with.
Hello? Artephius? Have you by any chance seen Toby? Oh, my! Artephius, are you all right? Ooh.
Hiya, Dulcinea.
Come to check on the spell, I bet.
It took me all night and 42 cups of Valerian root tea, but I did it.
I translated the whole darn thing.
Valerian root? Doesn't that just make you sleep? Oh, it sure does.
I had to balance it out with 43 cups of coffee.
Hah.
You thought you could keep me down, tea, but you can't.
I'm a mad dog! Anyway Oh, this is so exciting.
The spell is finally gonna be restored.
I was starting to believe it was never gonna happen.
I don't know though.
Something about this spell just seems fishy to me.
Real fishy.
You know, sometimes when those we care about are expecting a lot from us, it can make us feel - Gassy? - Nervous.
"When yourself you find in doubt, sing a song and belt it out.
" Oh.
No, wait, that wasn't the one.
"Turtle, turtle, turtle dove, gift" Wait.
No.
What? "Little Sparrow Fancy Pants" Ugh.
Okay, the point is you are a wonderful alchemist and you have nothing to be worried about.
Hm.
Well, maybe.
But this spell uses a lot of Arcanum Corallinum, which, as everyone knows, is typically used in dark spells of deceit and malice.
Really? Hm.
Okay, maybe actually you should And the scroll smells like tea.
Should magic scrolls smell like tea? Is that normal? It's the tea! It wants revenge! Danger! Danger! Danger! Alert the constabulary.
Die, you miserable cat! Hip, hop, hop, hop, hop.
- Oh! - Now give me my coin.
No! Leave Puss alone! Toby, what are you doing? Proving to you that I'm the better squire.
Everybody knows that I am Puss' squire.
No, I am! No! Stop! Bad.
Duchess, drop that coin.
You mean this magical coin that will allow me to power my amazing suit of magical armor? Yes.
Precisely.
With pleasure! Oh! Prepare to die, Puss in Boots! Did I hit someone? Nein.
You have only succeeded in making yourself appear foolish.
Why is this thing so complicated? Distract her.
- Your squire accepts.
- But, but Aw.
Hello, you! Look at me over here.
Do not concern yourself with the goings-on of Puss in Boots.
What are you doing? Stop that.
Da.
Look at my little hoofy legs.
Listen to how they keep time.
Give! Me! That! Coin! Stop! You're gonna break it.
I don't need the coin to operate the suit.
Just to turn it on.
But that is no fair.
I kinda wanna go home.
We are in complete agreement.
That was the last straw.
I will have my revenge on San Lorenzo! Oh.
- Hi, Puss.
You missed - Yes, hello.
No time.
Duchess coming.
- But do not worry.
I have it.
- Have what? The final piece of treasure.
Now, prepare your finest praise.
Eh Ugh! Ja, no, that was not nearly as dramatic as I'd hoped.
It worked.
Artephius! I've returned every last piece of treasure to the Treasure House and the Duchess is coming and she has a giant magical suit of armor and have you finished translating the spell yet? You bet.
Eeeh! Huzzah! Now, restore that spell! Oh, silly Puss.
Sure, I translated the spell, but executing it is gonna take a while.
- What? - I need to assemble ingredients, distill Arcanum Corallinum from spirit of nitre, shave my legs, which isn't technically a part of the process but grooming is important.
I'd say I'm at least two days out.
Hey, don't look so glum, chum.
The eclipse is still two days away.
Plenty of time.
Though, too bad it sounds like the Duchess is gonna destroy us anyway.
No! I have worked too hard.
If the spell cannot protect San Lorenzo, I will.
- How you gonna do that? - I do not know.
Hm.
Oh.
That reminds me.
The spell Something's fishy about it.
I think it might not be what it seems.
I must find a solution, lest madness overtake me.
- Ah! - Spells seem fishy all the time.
It is quite common.
Now, run along and do the spell, magic man.
- What do you know about spells? - Oh, every goaty man must learn basic alchemy when we are goaty boys.
Now go! Do it.
Do it! I must protect the town.
But how? I know! I will build a giant wall around San Lorenzo.
No, wait, that sounds crazy.
Ah, yes, I will train a flock of eagles to protect us.
No, too much bird seed.
Oh, oh! That is it! I will dig a protective moat around town using the power of punching.
Don't worry, Puss, we'll figure something out.
Ja.
Together.
Hello, San Lorenzo! Go! Duchess, I am in no mood for Make the fightings on her, Puss.
Ha.
Another innocent saved by Ha! Whoa, ooh! Whoa-oaaah.
Goodbye, Puss.
Huh? Oh! San Lorenzo! I have returned! Hmm.
It is I, the Great Mage Sino.
Excuse me, but I was about to smash my nemesis here.
Okay, well, so I'm just gonna go.
That is precisely how I would have vanquished her, O Great Mage Sino.
I am Puss in Boots, protector of San Lorenzo.
I welcome ye.
Thou.
You.
Um, yes.
Well You will be pleased to know that we are almost ready to restore your spell.
Huzzah! Restore it? Yes, but please, save your applause for It was meant to last a thousand years! Who broke it? You broke my spell? Well, you see, it is actually a very humorous story.
Puss in Boots! For the crime of breaking my protective spell, you are hereby banished from San Lorenzo.
Forever! Banished? But, O Great The Great Mage Sino has spoken! But I can explain.
I Enough! You put this town in danger.
You put your friends in danger.
And you are a bad kitty.
No, he's not, Sino.
You're He is right.
I am no hero.
I have committed myself to protecting you, but from what? My own mistake? No.
I see this now.
Sino is correct.
I must leave you.
Amigos, you must learn to get along in my absence.
I will not be here to glare at you anymore.
You're just gonna leave without a fight? That isn't like you.
I cannot fight Sino.
This is his town.
I was just living in it.
And ruining it.
So that's it? You're just giving up? Fine.
Then go.
Ha! "Puss in Boots is the best.
He's also very handsome.
" It doesn't rhyme but I don't care.
I feel this thing inside me like I do not hate him so much anymore.
Hey.
What's all the hubbub? Oh, that wonderful Puss in the Boots has restored the protective spell of San Lorenzo.
Whoa! Pickles for everyone! On the house.
Look! It's him.
Friends, I, Puss in Boots, have restored the protective spell of San Lorenzo at long last.
In fulfilling my promise, I have become the greatest legend in the history of legends.
Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Three cheers for Puss! Hip hip hooray! Hip hip hooray! - Hip hip - Hooray! Babieca, you are a unicorn again! That's right.
First I wasn't, then I was.
Then I wasn't again, and now I am again.
Hey, look! That looks just like me.
Sure does.
Now, do you wanna meet the man in the moon? You bet I do.
This is the greatest day of my life! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! Puss! - Puss! - Hm? Uh Oh, yes, yes, it was like I was saying, today will be the day that I fulfill my promise and finally restore the protective spell of San Lorenzo.
Ha! We have heard that before.
Yes, only today, it is true.
Artephius! The final piece of missing treasure.
Yes, my lord.
Are you ready to witness my greatest act of heroism ever? Heroism? You are just fixing the problem you created.
Please.
Hold your applause until after his heroic deed.
No, Uli.
Señora Zapata is right.
Breaking San Lorenzo's spell was the greatest mistake I ever made, and I will bear that burden until I set it right.
Which I will do! Now! O mighty Mage Sino, we have returned your treasure.
The debt is paid.
Sincerely, Puss in Boots.
Shouldn't something happen? Oh, you bet.
When all the treasure is returned, that should turn Sino's eye from angry red to pretty blue.
Hm.
Maybe if I just There.
Hey! Tall creepy statue! Look! The last piece of treasure! Now, change your eye back to blue! One moment.
Not to worry.
Maybe the statue is broken.
I just do not understand.
Why am I being punished? - We did everything we were supposed to.
- Mm-hmm.
I swore a sacred vow to protect San Lorenzo and return her to her former glory.
And I intend to do so.
Eh.
Your heart is in the right place.
Yes, of course it is.
This town and the people in it - are all that matters to me.
- Ow! Also, quick question, what suits a Statue Me better, marble or obsidian? Marble is more durable, but obsidian is more dramatic.
Hey! Whee! A thought just occurred to me.
Maybe the orb wasn't the last piece of missing treasure.
Maybe there's more.
No, no.
I refuse to believe that.
No more treasure.
Yeah, well, there must be more treasure out there.
It's a shame too, because the scroll spoke of a great doom Ow! that would coincide with the eclipse, which is only three days away.
Well, then.
If there is treasure to be found, I will find it at once.
I will set things right if it is the last thing I do.
That's the spirit! Then they will build me a statue so grand, people will do the bathroom in their pants when they see it.
Finish translating that spell at once.
By the time you have completed your task, I will have found the last of the missing treasure.
Ow! Toby, what are you doing? Helping you read through the treasure list-y thing.
'Cause I'm a better helper than Uli.
That is not how a squire helps his knight with his reading.
- Oh, really? - Ja.
This is how it is done.
- I'm reading harder, Puss.
- Nein.
I am.
That is enough! Both of you! Time out, now! I apologize, Herr Boots, but I am just so excited you are so close to fulfilling your destiny.
Yeah, what he said.
But better.
Not close enough, I'm afraid.
This inventory will take forever to get through.
Unless Whoa! Unless what? No, it is too dangerous.
But I thought nothing was too dangerous for Herr Boots.
True.
But I warn you, this could kill us all.
What are you gonna do? I am going to employ an ancient secret technique I learned from the mysterious monks in the Far East.
It is known as speed reading.
The miracles never stop mit you.
Oh.
Puss! Is he dead? Felina! The final piece of treasure.
I know what it is.
What is it? Is it bacon? It is a single gold coin.
One I recognize for its strange date: 1829, hundreds of years in the future.
And this future coin and I have a past.
It is fitting that the key to restoring the spell is the same piece of treasure that broke the spell when someone whose name I cannot recall took it as a souvenir.
Hmm I wonder what happened to that coin.
1829! At last, I have found the magical coin from the future that is the final piece of my latest, very much not-insane plot to rule the world.
And to think, they called me crazy.
They're the crazy ones! Oh! I am so excited to discover the coin's whereabouts.
Where do you think it is? Why, it probably ended up someplace harmless, like inside a walnut, or atop a friendly snail's shell or Huh? The Duchess' evil lair.
Seriously, what is it with the Duchess and lightning? - Ha.
She is no match for you.
- No match! Your muscles are like mountain boulders.
I am a rock! Your hands are like deadly serpents.
Your eyes, like jade pools gently lapping at the feet on a luxurious holiday.
What was that last part? Ooh.
It was probably the wind.
Let's go.
All right, we go in, grab the coin, and hurry home.
Und then they build your statue? Yes! Tell me, do you think this new design is too garish? It is more beautiful than heaven.
Good.
On three.
Uno, dos, three! Whoa! Wow, what? Who dares enter my Oh, it's you.
Well, let's get this over with.
Hello? Artephius? Have you by any chance seen Toby? Oh, my! Artephius, are you all right? Ooh.
Hiya, Dulcinea.
Come to check on the spell, I bet.
It took me all night and 42 cups of Valerian root tea, but I did it.
I translated the whole darn thing.
Valerian root? Doesn't that just make you sleep? Oh, it sure does.
I had to balance it out with 43 cups of coffee.
Hah.
You thought you could keep me down, tea, but you can't.
I'm a mad dog! Anyway Oh, this is so exciting.
The spell is finally gonna be restored.
I was starting to believe it was never gonna happen.
I don't know though.
Something about this spell just seems fishy to me.
Real fishy.
You know, sometimes when those we care about are expecting a lot from us, it can make us feel - Gassy? - Nervous.
"When yourself you find in doubt, sing a song and belt it out.
" Oh.
No, wait, that wasn't the one.
"Turtle, turtle, turtle dove, gift" Wait.
No.
What? "Little Sparrow Fancy Pants" Ugh.
Okay, the point is you are a wonderful alchemist and you have nothing to be worried about.
Hm.
Well, maybe.
But this spell uses a lot of Arcanum Corallinum, which, as everyone knows, is typically used in dark spells of deceit and malice.
Really? Hm.
Okay, maybe actually you should And the scroll smells like tea.
Should magic scrolls smell like tea? Is that normal? It's the tea! It wants revenge! Danger! Danger! Danger! Alert the constabulary.
Die, you miserable cat! Hip, hop, hop, hop, hop.
- Oh! - Now give me my coin.
No! Leave Puss alone! Toby, what are you doing? Proving to you that I'm the better squire.
Everybody knows that I am Puss' squire.
No, I am! No! Stop! Bad.
Duchess, drop that coin.
You mean this magical coin that will allow me to power my amazing suit of magical armor? Yes.
Precisely.
With pleasure! Oh! Prepare to die, Puss in Boots! Did I hit someone? Nein.
You have only succeeded in making yourself appear foolish.
Why is this thing so complicated? Distract her.
- Your squire accepts.
- But, but Aw.
Hello, you! Look at me over here.
Do not concern yourself with the goings-on of Puss in Boots.
What are you doing? Stop that.
Da.
Look at my little hoofy legs.
Listen to how they keep time.
Give! Me! That! Coin! Stop! You're gonna break it.
I don't need the coin to operate the suit.
Just to turn it on.
But that is no fair.
I kinda wanna go home.
We are in complete agreement.
That was the last straw.
I will have my revenge on San Lorenzo! Oh.
- Hi, Puss.
You missed - Yes, hello.
No time.
Duchess coming.
- But do not worry.
I have it.
- Have what? The final piece of treasure.
Now, prepare your finest praise.
Eh Ugh! Ja, no, that was not nearly as dramatic as I'd hoped.
It worked.
Artephius! I've returned every last piece of treasure to the Treasure House and the Duchess is coming and she has a giant magical suit of armor and have you finished translating the spell yet? You bet.
Eeeh! Huzzah! Now, restore that spell! Oh, silly Puss.
Sure, I translated the spell, but executing it is gonna take a while.
- What? - I need to assemble ingredients, distill Arcanum Corallinum from spirit of nitre, shave my legs, which isn't technically a part of the process but grooming is important.
I'd say I'm at least two days out.
Hey, don't look so glum, chum.
The eclipse is still two days away.
Plenty of time.
Though, too bad it sounds like the Duchess is gonna destroy us anyway.
No! I have worked too hard.
If the spell cannot protect San Lorenzo, I will.
- How you gonna do that? - I do not know.
Hm.
Oh.
That reminds me.
The spell Something's fishy about it.
I think it might not be what it seems.
I must find a solution, lest madness overtake me.
- Ah! - Spells seem fishy all the time.
It is quite common.
Now, run along and do the spell, magic man.
- What do you know about spells? - Oh, every goaty man must learn basic alchemy when we are goaty boys.
Now go! Do it.
Do it! I must protect the town.
But how? I know! I will build a giant wall around San Lorenzo.
No, wait, that sounds crazy.
Ah, yes, I will train a flock of eagles to protect us.
No, too much bird seed.
Oh, oh! That is it! I will dig a protective moat around town using the power of punching.
Don't worry, Puss, we'll figure something out.
Ja.
Together.
Hello, San Lorenzo! Go! Duchess, I am in no mood for Make the fightings on her, Puss.
Ha.
Another innocent saved by Ha! Whoa, ooh! Whoa-oaaah.
Goodbye, Puss.
Huh? Oh! San Lorenzo! I have returned! Hmm.
It is I, the Great Mage Sino.
Excuse me, but I was about to smash my nemesis here.
Okay, well, so I'm just gonna go.
That is precisely how I would have vanquished her, O Great Mage Sino.
I am Puss in Boots, protector of San Lorenzo.
I welcome ye.
Thou.
You.
Um, yes.
Well You will be pleased to know that we are almost ready to restore your spell.
Huzzah! Restore it? Yes, but please, save your applause for It was meant to last a thousand years! Who broke it? You broke my spell? Well, you see, it is actually a very humorous story.
Puss in Boots! For the crime of breaking my protective spell, you are hereby banished from San Lorenzo.
Forever! Banished? But, O Great The Great Mage Sino has spoken! But I can explain.
I Enough! You put this town in danger.
You put your friends in danger.
And you are a bad kitty.
No, he's not, Sino.
You're He is right.
I am no hero.
I have committed myself to protecting you, but from what? My own mistake? No.
I see this now.
Sino is correct.
I must leave you.
Amigos, you must learn to get along in my absence.
I will not be here to glare at you anymore.
You're just gonna leave without a fight? That isn't like you.
I cannot fight Sino.
This is his town.
I was just living in it.
And ruining it.
So that's it? You're just giving up? Fine.
Then go.