The Big Door Prize (2023) s02e10 Episode Script

Deercoming

1
[DUSTY] Can you hear me, MORPHO?
We'd like to move on now, please.
You jumped up fucking fortune cookie!
Oh, Dusty, I think you broke it.
I didn't break it.
You were smashing it with your fists.
I was just leaning forcibly on
it and asking it some questions.
And now it's saying, "Please see guide"?
But where's the guide?
You think if this
thing came with a guide,
I would have kept it to myself?
Dad, uh, we need to talk
to you. Where is Mom?
I don't know, Trina. I'm kind
of in the middle of something.
Jacob and I You know how
we've been getting closer
for, like, a while now
Yeah, yeah. Couldn't be happier
for you. That's so super.
But right now, we're looking
for a guide for the MORPHO.
- What?
- Well, Mr. Johnson and I
- pressed our fists against the screen
- Hey.
and now it's saying,
"Please see guide."
- But where's the guide, Jacob?
- It didn't come with a guide.
- It sounds like you broke it.
- I didn't break it. Why do people
It's not I'm just looking
for some effing answers,
because these effing visions
are making people lose
their brotherfucking minds.
[TAPPING BUTTONS RAPIDLY]
- Okay. So I think that now is
- [SIGHS]
not the best time to
ask about living together.
Yeah. I've never really
seen your dad like this.
For now, I think, why don't
you go talk to your dad
and just tell him that
my parents said yes?
To us living together?
You want me to lie to him?
It's not lying. My parents will say yes,
so it's more like a a pre-truth.
- Okay. What are you gonna do?
- [EXHALES HEAVILY]
Um, I'm gonna go find my mom, and
then I'll meet up with you later.
- Good plan?
- I guess. Why don't we just Tri Okay.
Good afternoon, Deerfieldians.
- Welcome to the Deercoming Parade.
- [CROWD CHEERING]
And may I say, you are
a vision today, Hawaii.
Well, thank you, Coach Eagleson.
And speaking of visions,
a lot of people have been thinking
about their potentials this year,
but all I am thinking about
is whether the Deercoming deer
will potentially come at
the end of this parade.
All signs point to yes.
And speaking of signs, here to
perform "The Sign" by Ace of Base,
Deerfield High's marching band!
[BAND PLAYING "THE SIGN"]
[CHEERING CONTINUES]
Pathetic.
Excuse me, I worked
very hard on this float.
Is the Deercoming deer
always such an asshole?
It's part of the tradition.
It's funny how everyone keeps saying
there's no more deer in Deerfield.
- Why is that funny?
- 'Cause I saw one.
It, like, ran in front of my
car when I was trying to leave.
- Really?
- Yeah. It was really weird, actually.
It was all white, like an
albino. It kind of freaked me out.
And that's why you turned back?
I guess. I don't know. [CHUCKLES]
I don't know why I came back.
I mean, I don't know if
there's a bigger purpose.
I'm the only one who can't
get a vision. [CHUCKLES]
Do you want a vision?
I mean, sometimes I wonder, if
I had just used the MORPHO
All that time I spent at the other bar.
- How do you know it's not still there?
- What do you mean?
Well, you just assumed the
MORPHO followed you here,
but how do you know
it's the same MORPHO?
- Well, I guess I don't, but
- Maybe it's not too late.
Maybe you could still get your card.
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- [HAWAII] Look at this.
We've got Martha and Rose, the
co-captains of the Cruisin' Cruise Inn.
They've recently put in a moat,
and, boy, can they rock a boat.
[CHUCKLES] If this float's
a-rockin', do come a-knockin'.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Natalie. Cassie. Where you guys at?
Come on. It's almost time for our float.
We're here. We're here. We
were just getting into costume.
Whoa. Mamma mia. Look at this.
[BLOWING KISSES]
I think you look like the
hottest little meatballs
I ever did see. Oh, my
- [NAT GIGGLES]
- [GIORGIO] Damn.
- Natalie, you look good enough to eat.
- [CASSIE GIGGLES]
And, Cassie, I would respectfully
take a little platonic
nibble out of you too, okay?
- But right now, we gots to go.
- Okay. Okay. We're ready.
We just wanted to run through
the choreo one last time.
Okay. It's all good.
Luckily, we're second
to last in the parade,
right before the deer float,
which is optimal awards positioning.
Look, um, I think that we should
make the most of this opportunity
with, like, a really big
announcement or something.
Okay. What you thinking, Cassie?
So, I know that you've
always been against delivery.
- Deliveries? [SPITS]
- [SPITS]
Giorgio's is an in-restaurant
- immersive experience only, Cassie.
- [MOUTHING] experience only.
But what about a meatball truck?
Just meatballs delivered
door-to-door in a truck.
The answer is yes.
- Wait, really?
- A meatball-mobile.
It's synergy. I love it.
- [LAUGHS] He loves it.
- Giorgio, you have no idea
what it means to hear "yes" for
a change, to feel like I'm valued.
- Stop. You are valued, Cassie.
- Aw.
And I need your ideas if I
want to expand my business.
And I have to expand my business
if I want to give Natalie the
biggest wedding in the world.
[GASPS, STAMMERS] Giorgio.
[LAUGHS, STAMMERS] No. And our
wedding's so far off, probably, right?
- What if it wasn't?
- [GASPS]
- Hey, Natalie.
- Yes?
What are you doing on New Year's Eve?
This New Year's Eve?
[STAMMERS] I don't know.
Probably an indoor rock climb
and a Turkish bath. I don't know.
- Want to have a wedding?
- [GASPS]
[WHISPERS] Nat, did
you hear what he said?
- [SCREAMING]
- Yeah. Is that a yes?
[SHOUTS] I think that's a yes.
Yeah, yeah. That's a yes. Yeah.
- Oh, Nat.
- Okay, I'm gonna go.
- Okay. [LAUGHS]
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah!
[HAWAII] Uh-oh, this
next float is bad news.
- For my waistline that is. [LAUGHS]
- Oh. [CHUCKLES]
[HAWAII] It's Deerfield Dough,
the feel-good bakery
with a heart of dough. Oh!
Ooh, and look what they've
cooked up this year.
Okay. Now, I've seen some big
cupcakes, but this is ridiculous.
[BELLS ON DOOR JINGLE]
- Dad.
- [SIGHS] Yeah.
Dad, I found the guide.
What's that?
Um
Where'd you find this?
I got it from Jacob's house.
[STAMMERS] Why didn't he tell me
when I asked him about the guide?
- Why did you say nothing?
- Um, it's Kolton's card,
and Jacob doesn't know what it
says. He didn't want to look.
Did you take this without telling him?
Well, yes, but he won't
even realize it's gone.
I swapped it with one
of his blank test cards.
Jesus, Trina.
- Well, this was your idea. [CHUCKLES]
- [BELLS ON DOOR JINGLE]
You're the one who smashed the machine.
You're the one who wanted the guide.
You were freaking the fuck out, Dad.
You were going completely off the rails.
- So, sorry if I wanted to help you.
- Okay. Okay.
What's going on? Did you tell him?
Tell me what?
I thought you said Jacob didn't know.
- Wait, what were you talking about?
- [TRINA] Um.
Uh
I took Kolton's card,
and I'm really sorry.
But, like, if the MORPHO needs
it to get to, like, the next
- next stage.
- [WHISPERS] Stage.
[NORMAL] Wait, what does Kolton's card
have to do with the next next stage?
- Does it say "Guide" or something?
- [EXHALES DEEPLY]
I mean, in our defense,
we didn't tell you that.
You're just a good guesser.
What the hell, Trina? I
told you I didn't wanna know.
I know. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.
Hey, hey, listen. There's
been a lot of mistakes
made by everybody here. Okay.
So, maybe you stole his
dead brother's MORPHO card
and have been lying about it.
- But I broke the MORPHO, you know?
- [JACOB SIGHS]
Actually, I didn't really break it.
- I actually unlocked a useful prompt.
- What did I do wrong?
You didn't do anything wrong,
Jacob. So it was actually just Trina.
- Oh, my God, Dad.
- But, you know, the
the key development here
that we need to remember
is that we now have the guide.
Well, I know you were
[CLEARS THROAT, CLICKS TONGUE]
probably planning on
keeping the card, Jacob.
But you could take a photo
of the card and keep that.
And of course, you'll always
have your memories of the card.
Fine. Just fucking take it. It's yours.
[DUSTY EXHALES DEEPLY]
[MUTTERS]
Jacob.
People of Deerfield,
this is an escape act.
During the chrysalis stage
of the butterfly's life cycle,
it might look like nothing is happening.
But inside the pupa,
all sorts of magical
things are taking place.
[TRINA] Excuse me. Sorry.
[MR. JOHNSON] The caterpillar
is broken down into nothingness,
- dissolved into goo.
- Sorry.
[MR. JOHNSON] But it's not dying.
It's becoming something new, something
even more beautiful than before.
Jacob, can I please try to explain?
I shouldn't have lied to you. I've
been trying really hard not to lie.
Yeah. Well, you really suck at it.
I know. [CHUCKLES]
[DRUMROLL]
I'm just trying not
to, like, hurt people.
Like, you said you didn't want to know,
and I thought it would be easier for you
if I just said that I hadn't looked.
But then you took it.
You broke into my house
and went in my room.
I didn't break into your
house, Jacob. You gave me a key.
- The door was unlocked.
- You took my brother's card, Trina.
- Why is it yours?
- What?
You took it from Kolton's
wallet. Why is it yours?
Yeah. Okay, fine. He was your boyfriend.
You weren't even gonna tell me about it.
[WHISPERS] Can we just drop
this? Just forget it, Trina.
[NORMAL] Please. Forget it.
What, do you, like, not
want to live with me anymore?
I think I think I
just have to be alone.
It's like my vision, right?
"One player only."
[MR. JOHNSON] Ta-da!
[CROWD CHEERING]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[CHEERING CONTINUES]
- [HOARSELY] Cass. Cass. Cass.
- [STAMMERS]
Cass, we're up next.
Are you ready for this?
Uh, yeah. I I'm ready. Are you ready?
Why are you talking like Susan,
the chain-smoking gambling addict?
Okay, here's the thing.
I may have lost my voice
screaming about my wedding,
and now I can't sing with you.
But I am here for you emotionally.
Heart-to-heart. Ball-to-ball.
- Uh-huh. [STAMMERS, SIGHS]
- [NAT] Hmm.
Oh, God. Oh, God. Nat, I'm
- I'm gonna have to do this on my own?
- No, you're not on your own.
I will still be shooting parmigiana
out of the confetti cannons
at all the right moments.
- Okay.
- Hey, you got this.
Okay. Oh. [TRILLS LIPS, YELPS]
Cass. Wow. Great balls
of beef, look at you.
[STAMMERS] Hey, Dusty,
can can you not right now?
Can we not what? I I was
just coming to apologize.
- Okay.
- I've been
I've been really distracted lately,
and I know that you
deserve better than that.
Thank you.
I was just giving way too much power
to this stupid machine, and then
and then I learned that
I was in Alice's vision,
and it just messed with my head.
- It made me confused.
- You were in Alice's vision?
Apparently. Who cares?
I mean, I'm in your life,
and you're in my life,
and that's all that matters.
But you just said you were
confused. Confused about what?
No, no, no. No, I'm
not confused anymore.
Like you were still deciding
between me and Alice?
Nope. No, no, don't
No, don't think that.
Dusty, you're the one who wanted
to end the self-ploration early.
Why would you do that if
you're still hung up on Alice?
- I [STAMMERS] I, um
- And why are we acting
like everything is okay between
us when clearly it's not?
[SIGHS]
Why did we think we
could take this time apart
and just do whatever we wanted
and just go on with our lives
as if nothing ever happened?
No. I need to go sing my song
for Giorgio in the parade, so
Yeah. Don't want to miss that.
You know what?
Actually, I don't wanna miss it.
And I'm not gonna allow you
or your stupid little
remarks hold me back anymore.
[ELECTRONIC SOUND EFFECTS PLAYING]
What does that mean?
It means that I'm gonna get
on top of that spaghetti tower,
and I'm gonna sing my damn song.
Nat!
[ENGINE STOPS]
[CAR DOORS SLAM SHUT]
You okay?
Yeah, uh, I was just thinking
about the last time I was here.
- You want to wait outside?
- No. No. I'll go in with you.
[DOOR RATTLES]
Is it closed?
I guess so. It looks like it's
been closed for a while now.
You want to call the owner?
Of the bar that I abandoned?
No, I really don't.
Hmm. Do you have a key?
[GLASS SHATTERING]
That'll work too.
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- They've got the power.
They've got the energy. It's
Deerfield Power & Energy.
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
Led by part-time tree photographer
and all-around live wire
Glen Steichman. [CHUCKLES]
- [LAUGHS]
- I love you, Glen!
[CROWD CONTINUES CHEERING]
Oh. I think I caught
that one. [CHUCKLES]
This is very important.
For all of the hunters, when
you pull the sleigh, don't rush.
You must give the children
ample time to enjoy me,
to celebrate me.
- Understood?
- [BEAU] Understood, Izzy.
Sorry I'm late. Had a little
slip and fall, but don't worry.
My doctor says I'm good to go.
Well, thank God. I was
ready to cancel the parade.
That won't be necessary.
As a medical professional, I
can attest that Beau is cleared
to do fancy skating tricks or take
his shirt off or anything you need.
Well, that's the last thing I need.
Nothing should pull focus from the deer.
Izzy. [LAUGHS] Oh, you look incredible.
- [SQUEALS]
- [LAUGHS] Oh. What's wrong?
Oh. I-Is this like a wedding?
Am I not supposed to
see you before you come?
[CHUCKLES] Excuse me, I need
to speak with a constituent.
All good. We'll do a
couple laps to limber up.
Oh. Bye.
[SMACKS LIPS] Constituent?
Oh.
Now, don't be offended.
When I'm in political mode,
I must disregard the
pleasure center of my brain
so that I can give the
people 100% of my focus.
- Oh. Oh, is that what's going on?
- Mm-hmm.
Or are you embarrassed
to be seen with me?
Oh, don't be absurd.
If you are that
desperate for my attention
on the day of Deercoming, then here.
Look at this. Izzy is getting busy.
I'm sorry. My hands are just a
little sweaty in these hooves.
Okay, people. Here it comes.
The second-last float of the parade.
Putting the ultimate in penultimate,
it's Giorgio's Restaurant
and Sports Center.
[CROWD CHEERING]
Okay, listen up, townspeople.
Natalie and I have set our wedding date,
and the whole town
is invited! Everybody!
Kids, babies. Bring your
dogs. No cats, please.
And that's not all.
Please welcome my cocapitano
with a special business announcement.
[CROWD CHEERING, WHISTLING]
People of Deerfield,
Giorgio's Restaurant has never
done deliveries of any kind.
But you know what?
We are done.
- [CROWD GASPING]
- We are done with that policy
and are now offering
meatballs door-to-door!
[CROWD ROARING]
We are making big changes here, people.
But we are not changing
our fast, quality service.
At Giorgio's, you get seated right away,
which means you will never
be "Standing In The Queue."
[CROWD CHEERING]
["STANDING IN THE QUEUE" PLAYING]
It's Friday night ♪
I'm alone in my flat ♪
So I call up my mates ♪
Say where's the party at? ♪
I wanna go for a pint ♪
Wanna drown in my tears ♪
Boy, you know this ain't right ♪
Can't keep me standing here ♪
I've been standing in the queue ♪
I don't know what to do ♪
I don't know what to do ♪
Without your love ♪
If I can't be with you ♪
I'm starting something new ♪
And, baby, I will truly rise above ♪
You said that you'd love me forever ♪
I guess that forever meant never ♪
You gave me no reason to doubt you ♪
But now I gotta move on without you ♪
I've been standing in the queue ♪
But now I'm pushing through ♪
You know I'm pushing through ♪
Without your love ♪
If I can't be with you ♪
I'm starting something new ♪
And, baby, I will truly rise above ♪
I'm finally pushing through ♪
Without your love ♪
And, baby, I will truly rise above ♪
- [CANNONS POPPING]
- [CROWD CHEERING]
Let's go, Cassie!
Well, shit.
Yeah, I don't know why, but I
I really thought it might be here.
Yeah, well, it's not.
Who wants a drink?
[FANFARE PLAYING]
And now, the moment we've
all been waiting for.
It's the Deercoming deer!
[FANFARE ENDS]
[CROWD GASPING, MURMURING]
What? This is extremely disappointing.
For the first time ever,
the deer has not come,
w-which means that this year,
no one will be getting
candied deer droppings.
A lot of children are gonna go
home disappointed. [CHUCKLES]
Where the hell is she?
- Did you hear what he just said?
- Mm-hmm.
A lot of children are
disappointed because of you.
- No. Fuck 'em. Life is disappointing.
- [CHUCKLES]
- It's better they learn early, right?
- Yeah.
You're my favorite constituent.
Deer drop?
- Uh, no.
- [CHUCKLES] Come on.
- Not in a million years.
- Hmm. Please.
- No, no, no, no.
- Yeah.
- Oh, please, no.
- Mmm.
- Oh, that looks
- Mmm. [CHUCKLES]
Mmm. [CHUCKLES]
[LAUGHS]
[HANA SIGHS]
So, I know I'm not supposed to ask this,
but I kind of also have to ask this.
Why didn't you use the MORPHO before?
[STAMMERS] I'm just curious.
After all the time
you spent at this bar,
and even after you came to Deerfield
and everyone was talking about it,
two bucks isn't much to
find out one's potential.
I think it was that word. "Potential."
One of the only things
that I remember about my dad
is that he was always talking
to me about my potential,
and yet he didn't give enough of a shit
to help me reach it,
whatever it might be.
He never cared about me.
So I avoided doing anything
with the education he bought me
or anything that could be
construed as achieving my potential.
So, yeah, he really fucked me up.
But hey, not everyone's
meant to be a dad.
[REUBEN SIGHS]
[HANA CHUCKLES]
[CHUCKLES] I don't know why
I let you talk me into this.
I mean, you're the one
who's obsessed with signs.
You're the one who thinks
everything means something, but
[CHUCKLES] But there's
nothing for me here.
- Hana.
- What?
[REUBEN] Should we listen to it?
Can you give me a minute?
Okay. I'll be right outside.
- Hey, Cass! Your song sounded so good!
- [CHUCKLING]
- Oh, you really think so?
- Yeah.
I think your mom was so intimidated
that she couldn't show her face.
- Wait, so she she didn't see it?
- I guess not.
I don't know what happened to
her, but you stole the show.
- [CHUCKLES]
- And also, just wanted to say,
so, so pumped for Trina
to move in with us.
I'm assuming she'd bring
her own feminine stuff,
but if there's anything
you think I need
I'm sorry. Did you just say
that Trina's moving in with you?
Oh. Uh, maybe I wasn't supposed to.
[STAMMERS] Jacob said you and
Dusty had given the go-ahead.
[STAMMERS] I'm sorry. Ca
Can you give me a second?
[BREATHING SHAKILY]
- Mom, your song was so good.
- [BREATHES HEAVILY]
Please don't leave me.
- What?
- I I can't be with your dad anymore.
[BREATHES HEAVILY] I-I need
more than just six weeks apart.
[STAMMERS] And I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry that I
keep letting you down,
but [INHALES SHARPLY] please
do not move in with Jacob, okay?
[INHALES SHAKILY] Please
just s-stay with me.
Okay.
Okay? [CHUCKLES]
Okay. [BREATHES SHAKILY, SIGHS]
- [SIGHS] Are you happy?
- I don't know if this is happy
[CHUCKLES] Cass.
I've never really had to think
about it, and that was just fine.
But now because of some
stupid fucking machine,
I have to think about it all the time.
[REUBEN] And this machine
is reminding people
that our lives have more
than one possible path.
[MR. JOHNSON] Take yourself
back to a memory of a place.
A real place. A peaceful place.
- Do you have it?
- Yep.
Where are you?
I'm skiing.
Please describe it.
- [DUSTY] It's snowy.
- [AUDIENCE MEMBERS CHUCKLING]
[MR. JOHNSON] More descriptive, please.
I need you to really put yourself there.
[DUSTY] Okay. Um, I'm skiing.
It's snowy. [CHUCKLES]
I'm maybe 20 years old.
And, uh I'm alone.
You see, I-I've taken the
wrong path on this
Or the wrong hill, or
whatever you call it.
So I start going real fast.
I am hurtling so quickly down
the face of this mountain.
And I never take the jump.
[PANTING] And I don't know
what's gonna happen, but it's
[INHALES DEEPLY]
God, it feels like, I'm honestly,
like I'm gonna like I'm gonna,
- like I'm gonna die. [CHUCKLES]
- [THUNDER CLAP]
But I also feel very alive.
Hello, little fella.
[DEER SNORTING]
Okay, deer.
[BELLS ON DOOR JINGLE]
[ELECTRONIC SOUND EFFECTS PLAYING]
[SOUND EFFECTS STOP]
[BUTTON BEEPS]
[ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[MUSIC STOPS]
- [CASSETTE PLAYER CLICKS]
- [RECORDED STATIC PLAYING]
[PARENT] Okay. It's now
the 3rd of September,
and I'm standing here with Hana.
Say hello, Hana.
[WHISPERS] You have to say
it into the tape recorder.
[NORMAL] Okay, okay.
- So, what did we do today?
- [HANA SOBBING]
[YOUNG HANA] We went to the park.
[PARENT] Okay, and?
[YOUNG HANA] We ate ice cream.
[PARENT] Yes, we ate ice
cream. And what else?
[YOUNG HANA] We had a cuddle.
- [PARENT] And?
- [YOUNG HANA] Daddy.
[HANA'S DAD CHUCKLES] Okay, Hana.
Is there anything else you want
to say to the tape recorder?
[YOUNG HANA] No.
[HANA'S DAD] Okay. Then
let's play our song. Ready?
[YOUNG HANA] Yes.
[HANA'S DAD] Here she is.
The one and only Hana.
- [HANA INHALES SHARPLY]
- [ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[BREATHES SHAKILY]
[ETHEREAL MUSIC CONTINUES]
[MUSIC STOPS]
[DISTORTED RUMBLING]
[THUD]
[INHALES SHARPLY]
[BREATHING SHAKILY] Hello?
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