The West Wing s02e10 Episode Script

Previously on The West Wing: I need a doctor! I need help! Single gunshot wound.
Entry, Ieft fifth intercostal space.
-Is it serious? -Yes, it's critical.
I've gotten calls about how staffers are handling the shooting in the aftermath.
-Psychologically? -Yeah.
-How did that bullet not kill you? -Just Iucky.
We don't know what the injury count is yet.
-Hi, Josh.
-Hi.
I'm Stanley Keyworth.
This is Kaytha Trask.
Josh Lyman.
-Do I call you doctor? -I'm sorry? Is it Dr.
Keyworth? Whatever you want.
You can call me Stanley if you want.
And Dr? I' m sorry.
T rask, but it's not doctor.
I' m not a psychologist.
Kaytha is training as a traumatologist.
I was wondering why there were two of you.
Kaytha's training.
-You don't mind, do you? -No.
What happened to your hand? I cut it putting down a glass.
-It broke? -Yeah.
-The glass broke? -Yeah.
Well, Iet me tell you a Iittle about who we are.
We're from ATVA.
That's the American Trauma Victims Association.
We're commonly called in by the government to work with trauma victims.
I'II give you some examples.
The pipe bomb at Lancaster Middle School we worked with the parents and the kids.
T ulsa.
Hurricane Beth.
The Chatham fire.
The Iowa tornadoes.
The FBI raid in Rock Creek.
So you are familiar with us.
I'm the deputy White House chief of staff.
I oversee 1 1 00 White House employees.
I answer directly to Leo McGarry and the president of the US.
Did you think you were talking to the paperboy? Did you imagine that I would walk into this room without knowing who you are and what you do? Then why did you Iie to me right off the bat? -Josh-- -She's not here training! As a matter of fact, she is.
I read briefing books every day on subjects more complicated than ATVA.
She is here training in trauma therapy.
-But that's not why there are two of you.
-No.
That's not the reason why there are two of you.
I go to the bathroom, go to my office answer the phone, one of you watches me? Yeah.
Stanley, you got off to a bad start.
-Yes, I did.
-Yes, you did.
Let's start again.
-You gonna Iie to me this time? -Nope.
-You gonna Iie to me? -Haven't yet.
-Really? -Yeah.
How did you cut your hand? You're not talking to the paperboy either.
I'd asked a woman for coffee a few minutes ago.
You want some? No, thanks.
-T ea? -No.
Maybe Iater.
The woman I asked works for you, I think.
Donna? -She works for you? -My assistant.
-Was she at Rosalyn? -It's Rosslyn.
I'm sorry? The shooting took place in Rosslyn, Virginia.
Not Rosalyn.
I'm sorry.
I'm not from around here.
-Where are you from? -San Francisco, California.
I always thought it was San Franchesca.
-Was she with you? -Donna? No.
Who was with you? Everybody.
We'd just gotten done with the town hall meeting.
-Just gotten off television.
-Who's everybody? The president travels with a Iarge group of people.
It was geared to young people.
There were Department of Education people.
Obviously, C.
J.
Cregg and the press corps, Leo McGarry Bob Shanahan, T oby Ziegler was there Ziegler's deputy, Sam Seaborn Zoey Bartlet was there, Charlie Young-- Who was with you? I'm trying to get you to tell me what happened.
I walked out of the building, heard gunshots people started screaming, I woke up in a hospital room.
Okay.
What happened three weeks ago? I don't know what you're referring to.
I don't know what I'm referring to either but some of the people you work with became concerned with your behavior about three weeks ago.
I've been concerned with their behavior since way before that.
They were talking about the pilot.
-The pilot? -Robert Cano, the Air Force pilot.
-What about him? -I don't know.
You said they were talking about the pilot.
-I said they may have been.
-Well, that's not what you said.
There was a Iot going on.
There was the IMF treaty petroleum reserves, AIaska, the president's-- -But you mentioned the pilot.
-Not for any special reason.
I was saying that there was a Iot happening three weeks ago.
Okay.
Then Iet's talk about three weeks ago.
-T oby? -Yeah.
-What the hell's going on? -What do you mean? -Who are these guys? -A brass quintet.
-I'm sorry? -A brass quintet.
Two trumpets, trombone, baritone horn, French horn.
-Do you Iike them? -Do I Iike them for what? T o play Christmas carols in the Iobby.
In the mornings and evenings as people come and go.
You Iike them? No.
-Why? -Because this isn't the Paramus Mall.
For the Iast two Christmases in this White House I've been accused of not being in the proper spirit.
Not this year.
For the next three weeks I will be filling this Iobby with music in the mornings and the evenings so that we may all experience this season-- Would you people stop playing for one damn minute? Sorry.
This season of peace and joy.
Okay.
So, what do you think? They seem fine.
The change they collect is for musical instruments in D.
C.
public schools.
T oby? Ben Zaharian stepped off the reservation Iast night.
What'd he do? You guys can keep playing.
He was at a Q and A at the NRDC about drilling the North SIope he was asked if the president would consider tapping into the SPR.
He said tapping into the SPR has a Iot of merit.
-I'II get into it.
-Thank you.
Sam.
Ben Zaharian did a Q and A Iast night and was asked about the Strategic Petroleum Reserve.
And he said the SPR is for emergencies Iike times of war? He said tapping into the SPR has a Iot of merit.
I'II talk to a deputy.
Would you, please? And go in and give C.
J.
a heads up.
--expressed his confidence that when the IMF and the World Bank meet in Prague next week, some restrictions will be relaxed.
How could Pete Didion's objections throw a wrench in the works? -Congress isn't in session, you mean? -Yeah.
After the first.
He sits on the Foreign Apps subcommittee, so.
Mark.
This is out of Ieft field, but do you know about a woman I don't know how to say this, going crazy during a tour? A White House tour? A woman saw a painting and started screaming.
I don't know, Mark.
There's a painting of Dolly Madison in the Grand Foyer catch it in the wrong Iight, it can scare-- -Okay.
-What else? Katie.
The energy secretary gave a speech at the Natural Resources Defense Council about the perils of drilling the North SIope.
During a Q and A, he was asked about tapping into the Strategic Petroleum Reserves to help ease oil prices.
He responded that the idea had a Iot of merit.
Does this signal a shift in policy since Iast June? No, it doesn't, but a bad idea in June isn't necessarily a bad idea in December.
-Why? -You don't need to Iower the price of heating oil in the summer.
Thank you, everybody.
-Thanks.
-Is somebody gonna speak to somebody? -I'II talk to a deputy.
-PIease.
What was that with the woman? -What woman? -The woman who went crazy on the tour.
-We get about five of those a week.
-Really? What exactly about the White House tour makes them go crazy? The blue blazers.
You' re gonna talk to somebody at the Energy Department? -Good save.
-Thank you.
-Where's the president? -Situation Room.
-What's going on? -Something about a pilot.
-T en-hut.
-What's going on? Sit down.
Mr.
President, an F-1 6 Falcon from the 27th Fighter Wing at Cannon Air Force Base in New Mexico has Ieft his group.
-What does that mean? -Returning home from an exercise the flight Ieader visually realized that the tail plane was no Ionger in formation.
No communication from the aircraft and it fails to respond to urgent radio calls.
-Is he in there alone? -The Falcon is a single-seat fighter.
-Did he crash? -If he crashed it would've triggered signals that would've been picked up.
Is there a chance he's trying to contact the ground and can't? A massive collapse of this plane's communication isn't very Iikely.
What does he have up there? He's got a 20mm Vulcan Cannon and seven AIM Sidewinder missiles.
Is his intention to defect with a military asset or to blow something up? We don't know what his intention is.
Don't our fighter pilots go through psychological testing? They go through extensive screening, sir.
He was deemed psychologically fit to fly.
Let me ask a ridiculous question.
Is there any way to bring this plane down without shooting it? No, sir.
Okay.
What about populated areas? We can take him over the Sierra Madres.
It's possible the pilot Iost consciousness due to a dramatic Ioss of air pressure and that's why this is happening.
We've scrambled F-1 6s to get a visual sighting.
If the pilot is dead, they'II see signs in the cockpit.
If conscious, he'II know he's been painted and he'II be given an order to Iand at a designated area.
If he doesn't, that's when we make a decision.
Yeah, okay.
And that was the first time you heard about the pilot? I'm sorry? That was the first time you heard about the pilot? No.
I wasn't in the Situation Room.
I don't sit in those meetings.
But that day was when you heard about the pilot? They'd tell me Iater, because I had an assignment.
-Having to do with the pilot? -Yeah.
-What was it? -I' m sorry if this question sounds rude but how Iong will we be here today? I' m sorry if this answer sounds rude, but as Iong as I want.
-I was asked here by Leo McGarry.
-I know who asked you here.
Three weeks ago.
The pilot.
For the fourth time, there was a Iot going on that day I' m not sure why we' re fixated-- What was the assignment with the pilot? I was supposed to Iook into his personal records to figure out why he-- It's the coffee, Josh.
-When'd you find out? -In the Situation Room an hour ago.
-How Iong's he been up there? -90 minutes since he broke formation.
They've deployed the 57th Fighter Wing from Nellis in Nevada, the 388th the 58th from Arizona, the 301 st out of T exas.
How Iong before I see this on TV? I' m amazed NewsCenter 4's traffic copter isn't there right now.
-How Iong before making visual contact? -About 1 0 minutes.
-What do we know about the pilot? -Not as much as I'd Iike.
-Want me to get into it? -Get the biographical info.
How did this guy get through a fairly intense psychological screening process? We gave this guy an $1 8 million war plane.
-I'II get into it.
-Excuse me.
-Donna-- -I have the personnel file for the pilot.
-How did you know I'd ask for that? -I'm tuned to you.
I anticipate your every need.
But to be walking by with the guy's personnel file? They called me 1 0 minutes ago.
Don't be a yutz.
-You' re a very handsome man.
-What do you need? You' re a very powerful and a very handsome man.
What do you need? -You know I never ask you for anything.
-What do you need? Yo-Yo Ma's playing at the Christmas party.
-Which one? -Congressional.
-Fine.
-I can come? -Give me the file.
-Can I come? T o the congressional Christmas party? Yeah.
You can take your Pablo Casals and your Rostropovich, I say Yo-Yo Ma rules.
What? -This guy.
The pilot.
-What about him? He's got the same birthday as me.
I'II be in here.
So I spoke to Jessie Witt at Energy.
I dressed her down pretty good.
They won't get us to change our policy on the SPR by announcing we should change it.
And I told her that in no uncertain terms.
-And? -I think we should change our policy.
I have to do this thing right now.
Can we talk about it Iater? You know this guy, the pilot? -We have the same birthday.
-I' m gonna talk to Leo about the SPR.
Bernard Thatch from the White House Visitors Office is waiting.
I asked him to come see me.
-CIaudia Jean.
-How you doing, Bernard? I' m not at all well.
-That's not unusual, is it? -No.
There was an incident on a tour? There's always an incident.
People touch things.
-You should punish them for that.
-I've begged my superiors to allow me.
-This had to do with a painting.
-Yes.
It's in the report.
Not a problem.
It made it to the press room, so I wanted to check.
The guide was pointing out the Gustave Caillebotte outside the BIue Room.
A woman began screaming.
-Completely incoherently.
-In English? If it was a Ianguage at all, its origin was unknown to me.
The agent on duty attempted to take a statement but not speaking whatever Ianguage she was simply escorted her out of the building.
Okay.
Thanks for stopping by.
C.
J.
, your necklace is a monument to bourgeois taste.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
Bernard.
Listen, who is Gustave Caillebotte and how Iong has his painting been here? He was a contemporary of Courbet, who was considerably more gifted.
This is a painting of the cliffs at Étretat, cleverly titled The Cliffs at Étretat.
-It is a minor work.
-What's it doing here? It was on Ioan from the Musée d' Orsay to the National Gallery.
The president, on a visit to the National Gallery and possessing Iess taste in fine art than you have in accessories announced that he Iiked the painting.
The French government offered it as a gift to the White House.
I suppose as retribution for Euro Disney, so here it hangs Iike a gym sock on a shower rod.
-You' re a snob.
-Yes.
I'd stay on the phone with Cashman and Berryhill.
They're gonna know when the F-1 6s have painted him before I will.
-Thank you, Mr.
President.
-Thank you.
In 1 0th grade, me and my friends took my father's Ford Country Squire on a joyride to Vermont.
He Iocked me in the garage till Easter.
What should we do with this pilot once his ass is on the ground? -You think that's gonna happen? -No.
I was asked to talk to you about Christmas cards.
-What about them? -Which will you sign by hand -and which get the autopen? -I'II sign them all by hand.
-We did this Iast year.
-I'II sign them all.
-That's not practical.
-I don't Iike the whole autopen idea.
-How many can there be? -Cards? -How many am I sending out? -1,1 1 0,000.
-Seriously? -Yes, sir.
I'm sending out 1.
1 million Christmas cards? It's a three-tiered system.
About Then 1 00,000 campaign workers and contributors.
-Who are the million? -You send a card to whoever writes -a Ietter to the White House.
-I do? Around a million people wrote.
-Some were death threats.
-They've weeded those out.
-Well, I' m not signing 1.
1 million cards.
-I wouldn't think so.
-1.
1 million cards? -Yes, sir.
-Yeah? -Sir.
-Situation Room.
-What happened? -He was dead.
-The pilot? -Robert Cano.
Leo came and told me.
-What had you found out about him? What do you mean? You were supposed to Iearn about the pilot and brief the president.
-I didn't Iearn anything.
-Must've Iearned something.
There wasn't time.
It was maybe 20 minutes -between when I got the assignment-- -How'd he die? Cano? He crashed into a mountain, Stanley.
No, was it because he Iost oxygen? Did you have to shoot him down? This was on the front page of newspapers.
It wasn 't on the front page of the sports section, so-- It's over.
-The F-1 6? -Yeah.
He went into a mountain north of Mexico City.
-Was the pilot alive when it crashed? -Yes.
-We know that for sure or--? -There was a radio communication.
-From the pilot? -Yeah.
-What'd he say? -He said, "It wasn't the plane.
" -That's it? -Yeah.
Okay.
-So, what do you know? -The same things you know.
He's from Tallahassee.
He trained at Laughlin on T -37s.
-What else? -Stanley-- -What else did you know? -I didn't know anything.
I knew his name.
I knew his rank.
I knew where he trained.
I knew his missions.
What else? -We had the same birthday.
-That's right.
And what else? He's got some medals.
One of them's a Purple Heart.
For what? His plane was shot at over Bosnia.
It caught fire, he ejected and there were some injuries.
That's right, Josh.
That's right.
-Bagpipes? -Yeah.
You put bagpipes in the Iobby? Not just any bagpipes.
Those guys are the Duncan McTavish CIarney Highland Bagpipe Regiment.
-They're a bagpipe regiment? -From Delaware, but they can play.
Two weeks ago, it was a brass quintet.
Yesterday, it was the Capital BIue PIate Banjo Band.
Capital BIuegrass Banjo Brigade.
And those guys were featured on Iocal news.
-They' re pretty Ioud.
-The bagpipes? Because shepherds need to call in the goats from atop the hills.
Shepherds herd sheep.
They don't do it in Delaware.
They can't play in the Iobby.
The money people toss in their cases will go to buy band uniforms for St.
Mary's Assumption High School.
-I'm not kidding.
-They have a 1 4-song repertoire.
I can hear the damn sirens all over the building.
The bagpipes.
The bagpipes.
They can't play in the Iobby.
Hang on a second.
Carol, a few days ago, I met with Bernard Thatch.
He didn't Iike my shoes.
He said the Secret Service took a report from a woman who had some kind of episode on a tour.
Hang on.
I should glance at that report.
Could you get it for me? If I could ask the SPR a question-- Would it be possible to hold the noise down out here? Do you need something? -I need the CBO spec.
-It's on your desk.
It's Iike a damn hockey game out here.
Did you know that there were people who were concerned about you? I don't.
-I'm not comfortable with that question.
-I mean, concerned with your behavior.
I understand what you meant.
If you Iook back, do you remember anything unusual about your behavior? -No.
-Why were your friends saying that? -This is incredibly prosecutorial.
-I don't care.
I think if you wanna know what my friends were thinking, talk to them.
-I did.
-So I gather.
-What was going on on the 1 9th? -The 1 9th of this month? -Five days ago.
-T o say, "What went on on the I9th".
-The things that go on here in a day-- -Name things that went on five days ago.
C.
J.
? C.
J.
? -C.
J.
? -Yeah? -What are you doing? -Eating.
-Why is--? -Something's strange about this photo.
Why is there no more information coming about Robert Cano? -It's not the photo, it's the painting in it.
-Why has there been no new information? Because there's no new information.
-There isn't.
-You accept that? A healthy Air Force pilot kills himself and nobody's asking why? We don't know why except that he wasn't perfectly healthy anymore.
-AII right.
-Hang on.
Look at this picture.
Does something in this picture Iook familiar? -It's a man holding a Iittle girl.
-Look behind the man, on the wall.
-The painting? -Yeah.
It Iooks familiar? It's the same one hanging outside the BIue Room.
-Are you kidding? -I need information.
-I'm going to the BIue Room.
-Yo-Yo Ma rules.
-She wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.
-You don't Iike the cello? I Iike the cello fine.
You asked me what was going on that day and one thing was that Donna wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.
-Who was playing at the Christmas party? -Yes.
Now, the day of that party, you had a meeting at the Oval Office.
-Probably.
-No, you did.
Okay.
You don't remember having a meeting that day? It's not unusual for me to meet in the Oval Office five or 1 0 times a day.
-The one I' m talking about wasn't usual.
-Stanley.
Come on.
You' re pissed at Sam, you' re pissed at T oby and C.
J.
You' re pissed at Donna.
Who's next? Last year New England had 1 6.
3 million barrels of commercial inventory.
-This year they have six.
-Nobody was next.
I don't know what you heard about this meeting, but it wasn't even my meeting.
OPEC will find a way to punish us.
The Saudis announced they'd welcome the US.
tapping into the SPR.
Even they think the price is too high.
If they' re concerned, why don't they make oil faster? -They' re not that concerned.
-Didn't think so.
It was Sam's meeting.
He wanted the president to meet with his energy and economic advisors.
I was there for a political perspective.
What does that mean? Only two things stop the government from doing anything: money or politics.
So you were there to say it was a bad idea politically? -Did you think it was? -Yeah.
-Did you say so? -I' m paid to say so.
-What'd you say? -I told him to.
You're not gonna understand it.
-I'm a fairly well-educated guy.
-You need to understand the background.
Did you raise your voice? -T o the president? -Yeah.
No.
-Okay.
-You don't raise your voice to him.
-Certainly don't do it in the Oval Office.
-Okay.
There's always Iively discussion, and the president's informal with his staff but there's a Iine you don't cross.
Ever.
You don't ever cross that Iine.
-Let's set up a meeting.
-Sir, can I-- -You sold me, we'II set up a meeting.
-Excellent.
-Can I say I think it's a bad idea? -Why? -Not something Didion's gonna Iike.
-I' m talking about a meeting but if I decide to do it, the president controls the SPR, not Congress.
-Didion controls the IMF vote.
-They aren't related.
-Let's move on.
-The two are related.
Through Didion.
I'm saying the Strategic Petroleum Reserve and forgiving the IMF debt are not related.
-Anything else? -Of course they are.
If Didion doesn't Iike us using the SPR, he won't Iet IMF debt out of committee.
-We'II talk to him tonight.
-Mr.
President-- At the Christmas party.
We'II take him aside.
-Sir, you can't just take him aside.
-Josh, we can move on-- -We can't move on from here.
-Josh-- We can't just take him aside! If we tell him we need his help we give him visibility and power and we put him in a position to say no and be a hero to his party -and who wouldn't wanna do that? -Josh, Didion's a good guy.
-We can talk to him.
-Listen to me.
You have to Iisten to me.
I can't help you unless you Iisten to me.
You can't send Christmas cards to everyone, you can't do it.
Forget the SPR.
Let's get the IMF Ioans Iike we said we were going to Iisten to what I have to say about Didion and please Iisten to me! Josh.
-AII right, Iet's move on.
-Josh, go wait in my office, would you? -I suppose if it's just a meeting-- -Wait in my office.
Okay.
-We'II talk to Didion tonight? -Yeah.
It's not intervention in a free market, if that's what he's worried about.
-I agree.
-It's not free trade if the price of oil is being controlled by a cartel.
-Sam, you'II be in on this? -Yes, sir.
-Thanks.
-Thank you, Mr.
President.
Have you ever heard of ATVA? -Leo-- -Have you? -I think I should go back in there.
-American Trauma Victims Association.
-Leo-- -We call them to treat trauma victims -specifically we-- -I know what ATVA is.
-You're gonna sit with a guy.
-Leo-- You're gonna sit with a guy.
If this is because of what I just said in there-- Josh, I'm not sure you were fully conscious while you were saying it.
-Well, thank God for Leo.
-Yeah.
I'm serious.
The man's an alcoholic, he knew what he was talking about.
-I'm not sure it was as bad as maybe-- -It was.
Stanley, you can ask questions or answer them, but not both at the same time.
Yes, I can.
-Why? -Because I know the answers and I don't work for you.
-Is there gonna be--? -How'd you cut your hand? -Stanley.
-No, how'd you do it? I put a glass down.
Yeah, I don't think you did.
Stanley, I got home from the thing, I made a drink, I sat down I pushed the magazine aside to use as a coaster, I missed the coaster.
You missed the coaster with quite a bit of force.
-I work out when I can.
-I swear, I am completely unimpressed with clever answers.
And I was so hoping we'd have a second date.
You're in nine kinds of pain.
You don't know what's going on inside of you and you are so Iocked into damage control that you can't-- -You diagnosed me in eight hours? -Josh, I diagnosed you in five minutes.
T alk about the night of the party.
Mr.
Lyman, are you in there? You said you put down the glass when you came home from a party that night.
Yeah, the congressional Christmas party.
Mr.
Lyman? The congressional Christmas party, it was white tie which is unusual, but the president Iikes it.
You Iook good, Charlie.
I didn't know people dressed Iike this anymore.
-I've brought it back.
-Yes, sir.
Like Woodrow Wilson and top hats.
We're not gonna wear top hats, are we, sir? -No.
Thank you.
-Good evening, Mr.
President.
Charlie, this is how statesmen dress.
This is how they dress at times of occasion.
-Yes, sir.
-It's regal.
-Yes, sir.
-Eagle's moving.
Hello, I'm sorry to keep you waiting.
C.
J.
, this is Rebecca Housman and her son, David.
I'm C.
J.
Cregg.
We spoke on the phone.
-Yes.
-Mrs.
Housman, I'm C.
J.
Cregg.
I'm the White House press secretary.
-Does she understand me? -A Iittle.
This is your painting.
Your father was Augie Housman? -Yes.
-He was an art collector.
Mostly of minor Impressionists that no one else really cared that much about.
He was a French Jew.
And the Vichy Iaws stripped him of his property.
-Yeah.
-Well, best as we can tell the Nazis sold the painting to a Swiss dealer after your grandfather perished at Auschwitz.
It made its way to the Musée d' Orsay, then to the National Gallery where the president spotted it.
We've contacted the French-- Who promptly surrendered.
Who wanted to settle this matter amicably.
We'd Iike you to have our sincere apology as well, of course, as the painting back.
-Thank you.
-Well, you've made an old woman and her son very happy.
David, do you happen to know what your grandfather paid for it originally? It would have been about the equivalent of $300 US.
Yes, that's about right.
Would you explain to your mother that I had the painting appraised and it's worth about 400,000 now? You should also tell her that if she Iikes we'd be honored to continue hanging the painting and the Ionger we do, the higher it'II appreciate.
No.
Officers McDaniel and Smith from the Park Police are gonna escort you home.
-Thank you very much.
-Thank you.
See, you try very hard to be mean, but then you see that being nice is better.
-You' re a freakishly tall woman.
-So that moment's over? -Yes.
-Oh, Josh.
Sam said the Didion meeting went well.
Yeah, we'II support a LIHEAP subsidy for air conditioning in the T exas 23rd.
-Guess it's Christmas.
-Yeah.
-We're starting in five minutes.
-Yeah.
-What was the diagnosis? -I'm sorry? You said you diagnosed me after five minutes.
What was the diagnosis? You have post-traumatic stress disorder.
Well, that doesn't really sound Iike something they Iet you have if you work for the president.
So can we have it be something else? Seriously, I think you might be wrong about that.
-I' m not trying to be difficult.
-I don't think you are.
-I know I'm giving you cocky answers-- -Listen.
You want me to talk about my feelings-- No, I don't, Josh.
The Iast thing I want you to do is talk about your feelings.
I think if you heard a tape recording of this day you wouldn't hear the word feelings.
What we need to get you to do is be able to remember the shooting without reliving it.
And you have been reliving it.
We have polling that indicates if Johann Sebastian Bach were alive today he would've voted for me.
Right? It happened during the Christmas party.
I' m not trying to give you cocky answers-- I am the guy you tell, Josh.
It happened at the Christmas party.
--the Bach Suite in G major, please join me in welcoming Yo-Yo Ma.
-Josh.
-I was fine.
-Josh.
-It was.
The Bach G major.
That's a nice piece.
It is.
-Did he play it well? -It's Yo- Yo Ma.
-I've never heard him in person.
- Well, it's really.
He 's really quite something.
-How did it start? -I don't know.
-Y es, you do.
-I was just sitting there.
-And then what? -I don 't know.
-What are you, in the fourth grade? -I don't know how it started! You tasted something bitter in your mouth.
It was the adrenaline.
The bitter taste was the adrenaline.
What happened then? I couldn 't make it stop.
-He 's got a single gunshot wound.
-BP is 90 palp.
I couldn 't make it stop.
No, you couldn't, Josh, but you'd been trying for three weeks.
And that's why you were feeling sick inside.
And what happened when you went home that night? Mr.
Lyman, are you in there? You had an at the party that afternoon you had blown up in the Oval Office what happened when you went home that night? -Honestly, nothing.
-Okay.
-I sat down on the couch.
-Can you honestly tell me that when -that pilot committed suicide.
-I pushed a magazine aside to-- Can you honestly tell me that you didn't wonder if you were suicidal too? -I didn't wonder that.
-You're Iying.
Everything that the two of you had in common-- -We had nothing-- -You had the same birthday.
-Who gives a damn if we did? -But you knew something else.
You knew he had been shot down once, that his plane had caught on fire that he had ejected and that there were some injuries.
Stanley, I made myself a drink.
I pushed aside a magazine to use as a coaster-- Josh.
How did you cut your hand? Mr.
Lyman, it's the super.
Mr.
Lyman, are you okay in there? Mr.
Lyman! Okay then.
-Okay then? -That's that.
I'm cured? Yeah, Josh, you're cured.
No problem.
I'm gonna recommend a therapist -you'II Iike.
-I Iike you.
-You're too easy a case for me.
-I broke a window.
Yeah, stop doing that.
I wanna commend you on not hurting anybody else or yourself too badly, but nevertheless stop doing that.
-And that'II do the trick? -Yep.
I'm getting shortchanged here.
Merry Christmas, Josh.
We' re done.
I'II call your office after the holidays -and give you a number.
-It was nice meeting you.
Hang on.
What happens if tomorrow some pilot with my birthday -decides to kill himself? -That wasn't what started it.
What started it? You were already cooking for a few hours before the pilot.
-I was? -Usually with a gunshot victim it's a car backfiring or a twig snapping, but that's not what it was with you.
What was it? -Kaytha? -The music.
-The brass quintet.
-Why would the music have started it? I know it's gonna sound Iike I' m telling you that two plus two equals a bushel of potatoes, but at this moment, in your head - music is the same thing as-- -As sirens.
Yeah.
So that's gonna be my reaction every time I hear music? -No.
-Why not? Because we get better.
-AII the same, I need some more therapy.
-You' re gonna get some.
-I mean now.
-Merry Christmas, Josh.
-We can order pizza.
-Have a good night.
Stanley, I haven't told you my dreams yet.
Fax them over to me.
Merry Christmas.
How'd it go? -Did you wait around for me? -How'd it go? -He thinks I may have an eating disorder.
-Josh.
And a fear of rectangles.
That's not weird, is it? I didn't cut my hand on a glass.
I broke a window in my apartment.
This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole.
The walls are so steep he can't get out.
A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up: "Hey, you! Can you help me out? " The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up: " Father, I' m down in this hole.
Can you help me out? " The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
Then a friend walks by: " Hey, Joe, it's me.
Can you help me out? " And the friend jumps in the hole.
Our guy says, "Are you stupid? Now we're both down here.
" The friend says: "Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out.
" Long as I got a job, you got a job, you understand? You wrapped that yourself, right? The bandage? Yeah.
Donna's gonna take you to the emergency room.
-She knows? -She was the one who guessed.
-I don't need the emergency room.
-It could be infected -you could have a thing.
-What thing? -How the hell do I know? -Leo-- Let's go.
-See you Iater.
-Okay.
-I don't need a doctor.
-Are you a doctor? -No.
-Then be quiet.
-Josh? -Yeah.
-Let's go.
-Okay.