Clarence US (2014) s02e11 Episode Script
Ice Cream Hunt
1 [remote clicks.]
[upbeat music plays.]
I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! Ahh.
Clarence: Let's stretch those legs, Miss Stegosaurus.
[Giggling.]
[Clicking.]
[Snoring.]
[Timer dings.]
[gasps.]
Ice cream! Man: Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! [High-pitched scream.]
Oh! And he goes down! Mom? Hey, Mom, can we get ice cream? Huh? Uhh? What? I ice ice cream? Oh, you know what? That sounds real good.
Give me 10 minutes to finish my taxes, then we'll go.
Huh, I wonder if I can deduct stretch pants.
I think that could be Aaand we're back with more "dodge! Cook! Dodge!" - Grill dodge, t-4, grill - Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! [Hums.]
Woman: Huxely, no! [Dog barking viciously.]
Aah! - Oh, hello Clarence.
- [Shakily.]
Mrs.
Herpelby, do you want to to get ice cream with me? No Clarence.
[Lullaby plays.]
Hey, Mr.
Farris! I was wondering - Shh! - If maybe you Shhh.
[Groans.]
Who wants to go get some ice cream? With your old pal, Clar [Classical music plays.]
Hey, Stephanie! Hey, Mr.
Niles and Mrs.
Niles! Clarence, we're busy.
We're eating dinner right now.
Yeah, um, I was just wondering if you guys would want to eat ice cream with me.
Are you guys done? No, Clarence.
No, we're not.
What are you guys eating? - Man: Bye, Clarence.
- Wait, but [Meows.]
Oh, hello there.
[Yowls.]
Aaaahh! Who else likes ice cream? [Gasps.]
Larry? Hey, Larry! [Grunts.]
Hey, I know you! Nice to see you outside! You live here? It's me Clarence.
Remember me? - Uh family, uh, raise chickens? - Yep, that's me.
- Uh, what's your yield? - Hey, wait.
Do you want to get ice cream with me? Ice cream? I never had it.
You've never had ice cream before? - Almost did once.
- What?! I like chocolate.
And my friend Jeff, he likes hazelnut.
Hazel nut And Sumo, he says his favorite is chocolate, too, but me and Jeff found out it's vanilla.
- Chocolate? - And my mom, she likes strawberry.
Yeah, we all go to this one place.
A-Actually, it's pretty close.
Do you want to go? - Just got to grab my keys.
- Wow.
You got a lot of stuff! [Laughs.]
Let's see oh, you got a book over here.
Oh, wow! Another book? Very cool.
Oh.
And you got more stuff what's over here? Hmm.
That's a bike lock.
No.
Safety deposit.
No.
Oh, that's a P.
O.
Box.
I don't know.
Oh, man.
People sure like shaking your hand! Huh.
Wow.
Where'd you even find any of this? "Carrot bread plums five for one" Do you write all this yourself? - Yeah.
- Wow.
Found my car keys.
Let's go.
I like your car.
[Blows.]
[Coughs.]
So, uh, you know where this place is? Oh, yeah, no problem.
I know this town so good.
Okay.
Here we go.
[Engine starts.]
Okay, so, um, just go forward.
You're doing great.
And then okay Good, good, good.
You're doing great.
Beautiful.
Probably turn around a little.
Yep.
Okay, turn more.
Keep turning.
Okay, so tree Go that way! - This is the way for the ice cream? - Yep.
But we're just gonna pick up my friend Sumo first.
- Ice cream! - Oh! Sumo, this is Larry, which is short for Clarence, like me.
This is Sumo, which is, um, which is what we just call him instead of Ryan.
- Uh, is that your tire pile? - Oh, uh, yeah.
That's a good pile.
[Engine revs.]
Ice cream? Yeah.
I'm game! Wait.
You're not Clarence's mom.
Are those flip-flops or sandals? Great! Okay, Larry! To the ice cream store! - Which way is that? - Uh yeah.
I think it's kind of by where my mom buys her shoes.
[Laughs.]
Um Hee-yah! Um, turn in a circle after we pass the chicken bucket statue Or was it, uh, just a chicken statue? Oh, no! No, no, no.
Straight ahead.
Oh, no, no, no.
Right here! Right here! Oh, wait.
Nope.
Back her up.
Beep, beep, beep! Come on.
Back it up! Back it up! [Barking.]
Okay.
We're just passing Max's super max superstore.
Oh, oh, oh! And there's hip clips! Oh, wait that's a different one.
Clarence, this is taking us North.
The ice cream parlor is South.
What's going on? Are we lost? Uh, could you reach in and grab me the map? Ice cream coordinates are here! Sir! Okay, Spring Street cross the freeway there [Muttering.]
Is that North or South? [Car horns honk.]
[Dogs barking.]
[Click.]
I forget things all the time if I didn't write it down All of these are just filled with useless gibberish.
- Why would anyone save this? - Be careful with that! That's the ones where I keep all my bank numbers.
[Laughs.]
[Barking.]
Boy likes to laugh.
[Horns honk.]
Ooh! They're opening up a new home and garden center.
- Did you get the Cross Street? - Get off the road, grandpa! [Barking continues.]
Maybe we should ask for directions.
Wait, there it is! Ha, turn around, it's behind us! Wh Where? [Tires screech.]
Whoo! [Horns honking.]
[Tires screeching.]
- Watch out! - What's happening?! [Crash!.]
[All exclaim.]
[Screaming.]
[Tires screech.]
What is this, honestly! [All yelling.]
Car's out of gas.
Guess we're parking.
Let's go.
[Yelling continues.]
Oh! Safety first, kids.
There's some dangerous drivers around here.
All: Aww! [Young woman giggles.]
I should call my grandpa.
[Dogs barking.]
Oh, no! Aah! [Horns honking.]
Come on, guys! Let's get moving! [Slurp!.]
Aaah! [Siren wails.]
Car 27, requesting backup.
[Inhales deeply.]
License and regi [Wheezes.]
[Siren wails in distance.]
Ooh! Ha ha ha.
[Mellow jazz plays.]
Would you kids like to try a sample? Larry: [clears throat.]
That won't be necessary.
One chocolate for Clarence here.
Uh, one vanilla, uh, for Sumo.
What? Who said I liked vanilla? I don't like vanilla.
Don't change it, though.
And one hazelnut for Jeff.
Wait.
How did you know what flavors we wanted? Wrote it down.
So you just write everything down in case it's useful later? W-What? Yeah.
Says right here.
Jeff favorite ice cream hazelnut.
I mean, how do you know what to write down and what to leave out? It's all important.
Oh! And one strawberry! For your sister.
Here you go, sir! That'll be $4.
75! Ah, let's see here, I got a nickel a quarter here, uhh Oh! That one's, uh that's from my collection.
Got a couple of Sacagaweas in there [Indistinct shouting.]
Traffic is huge all the way back to Coolidge.
Cats and dogs from all over Aberdale on the road, caused by what appears to be a confused grandfather and his grandkids.
I'm hearing we have some amateur footage.
Let's check it out! [Singsong voice.]
I love you most! Aaahh! [Tires screech.]
Stay classy, Aberdale.
[Splash!.]
Oh, no, no, no! Oh, shoot.
Huh? Clarence: Uh-oh.
[Laughs.]
Welp.
Come on.
Follow me.
I know I got another one parked somewhere around here.
Um, let's see Oh! Uh-oh.
Pole's already down.
[Slurps.]
[Growling.]
Mm, mmm.
Uh, guys? There's a bus stop right here.
Oh, no, no.
Uh, it says here to keep going.
"Under the barricade.
" [Sumo laughs.]
"Enter park, take a left.
" Hmm.
Oh! So we're going through a bush now.
Great plan.
I mean, sure, he knows what ice cream we like, but does he really know where he's going? Heh! There it is! Found it.
[Raccoon chitters.]
Huh.
And you wanted to take the bus.
[Engine sputtering.]
[Pop!.]
[Whirring.]
[Door opens.]
Hey, mom! I brought you some ice cream! [Gasps.]
Is that a 10-99 form?! - Ooh, streamers! - Clarence, you didn't tell me you were bringing your friends over.
I thought we were gonna go get ice cream Oh! Oh-ho-ho.
And And you brought Larry.
That's that's so nice.
Hi, Larry! - Heh.
How are you? - Hello.
Hey, Mom, you like waffle cones, right? Well, I got you your very own waffle cone! Oh, whoops.
Let me just Oh, Clarence, Clarence, you're you're getting it everywhere.
Here give me that.
Mmm.
- Oh! Strawberry! - Mom, look! Larry's about to try ice cream for the very first time ever.
What? No.
We all ate ice cream at Chuckleton's together, remember? Shh, shh, shh! Just watch! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! [Coughing.]
Mom, I think the ice cream's made of poison.
Raa! You didn't tell me it was going to be cold! It's cold! [Splat!.]
I'll take a nap.
[Door closes.]
Yeah.
It is too cold.
[upbeat music plays.]
I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! Ahh.
Clarence: Let's stretch those legs, Miss Stegosaurus.
[Giggling.]
[Clicking.]
[Snoring.]
[Timer dings.]
[gasps.]
Ice cream! Man: Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! [High-pitched scream.]
Oh! And he goes down! Mom? Hey, Mom, can we get ice cream? Huh? Uhh? What? I ice ice cream? Oh, you know what? That sounds real good.
Give me 10 minutes to finish my taxes, then we'll go.
Huh, I wonder if I can deduct stretch pants.
I think that could be Aaand we're back with more "dodge! Cook! Dodge!" - Grill dodge, t-4, grill - Dodge! Grill! Dodge! Grill! [Hums.]
Woman: Huxely, no! [Dog barking viciously.]
Aah! - Oh, hello Clarence.
- [Shakily.]
Mrs.
Herpelby, do you want to to get ice cream with me? No Clarence.
[Lullaby plays.]
Hey, Mr.
Farris! I was wondering - Shh! - If maybe you Shhh.
[Groans.]
Who wants to go get some ice cream? With your old pal, Clar [Classical music plays.]
Hey, Stephanie! Hey, Mr.
Niles and Mrs.
Niles! Clarence, we're busy.
We're eating dinner right now.
Yeah, um, I was just wondering if you guys would want to eat ice cream with me.
Are you guys done? No, Clarence.
No, we're not.
What are you guys eating? - Man: Bye, Clarence.
- Wait, but [Meows.]
Oh, hello there.
[Yowls.]
Aaaahh! Who else likes ice cream? [Gasps.]
Larry? Hey, Larry! [Grunts.]
Hey, I know you! Nice to see you outside! You live here? It's me Clarence.
Remember me? - Uh family, uh, raise chickens? - Yep, that's me.
- Uh, what's your yield? - Hey, wait.
Do you want to get ice cream with me? Ice cream? I never had it.
You've never had ice cream before? - Almost did once.
- What?! I like chocolate.
And my friend Jeff, he likes hazelnut.
Hazel nut And Sumo, he says his favorite is chocolate, too, but me and Jeff found out it's vanilla.
- Chocolate? - And my mom, she likes strawberry.
Yeah, we all go to this one place.
A-Actually, it's pretty close.
Do you want to go? - Just got to grab my keys.
- Wow.
You got a lot of stuff! [Laughs.]
Let's see oh, you got a book over here.
Oh, wow! Another book? Very cool.
Oh.
And you got more stuff what's over here? Hmm.
That's a bike lock.
No.
Safety deposit.
No.
Oh, that's a P.
O.
Box.
I don't know.
Oh, man.
People sure like shaking your hand! Huh.
Wow.
Where'd you even find any of this? "Carrot bread plums five for one" Do you write all this yourself? - Yeah.
- Wow.
Found my car keys.
Let's go.
I like your car.
[Blows.]
[Coughs.]
So, uh, you know where this place is? Oh, yeah, no problem.
I know this town so good.
Okay.
Here we go.
[Engine starts.]
Okay, so, um, just go forward.
You're doing great.
And then okay Good, good, good.
You're doing great.
Beautiful.
Probably turn around a little.
Yep.
Okay, turn more.
Keep turning.
Okay, so tree Go that way! - This is the way for the ice cream? - Yep.
But we're just gonna pick up my friend Sumo first.
- Ice cream! - Oh! Sumo, this is Larry, which is short for Clarence, like me.
This is Sumo, which is, um, which is what we just call him instead of Ryan.
- Uh, is that your tire pile? - Oh, uh, yeah.
That's a good pile.
[Engine revs.]
Ice cream? Yeah.
I'm game! Wait.
You're not Clarence's mom.
Are those flip-flops or sandals? Great! Okay, Larry! To the ice cream store! - Which way is that? - Uh yeah.
I think it's kind of by where my mom buys her shoes.
[Laughs.]
Um Hee-yah! Um, turn in a circle after we pass the chicken bucket statue Or was it, uh, just a chicken statue? Oh, no! No, no, no.
Straight ahead.
Oh, no, no, no.
Right here! Right here! Oh, wait.
Nope.
Back her up.
Beep, beep, beep! Come on.
Back it up! Back it up! [Barking.]
Okay.
We're just passing Max's super max superstore.
Oh, oh, oh! And there's hip clips! Oh, wait that's a different one.
Clarence, this is taking us North.
The ice cream parlor is South.
What's going on? Are we lost? Uh, could you reach in and grab me the map? Ice cream coordinates are here! Sir! Okay, Spring Street cross the freeway there [Muttering.]
Is that North or South? [Car horns honk.]
[Dogs barking.]
[Click.]
I forget things all the time if I didn't write it down All of these are just filled with useless gibberish.
- Why would anyone save this? - Be careful with that! That's the ones where I keep all my bank numbers.
[Laughs.]
[Barking.]
Boy likes to laugh.
[Horns honk.]
Ooh! They're opening up a new home and garden center.
- Did you get the Cross Street? - Get off the road, grandpa! [Barking continues.]
Maybe we should ask for directions.
Wait, there it is! Ha, turn around, it's behind us! Wh Where? [Tires screech.]
Whoo! [Horns honking.]
[Tires screeching.]
- Watch out! - What's happening?! [Crash!.]
[All exclaim.]
[Screaming.]
[Tires screech.]
What is this, honestly! [All yelling.]
Car's out of gas.
Guess we're parking.
Let's go.
[Yelling continues.]
Oh! Safety first, kids.
There's some dangerous drivers around here.
All: Aww! [Young woman giggles.]
I should call my grandpa.
[Dogs barking.]
Oh, no! Aah! [Horns honking.]
Come on, guys! Let's get moving! [Slurp!.]
Aaah! [Siren wails.]
Car 27, requesting backup.
[Inhales deeply.]
License and regi [Wheezes.]
[Siren wails in distance.]
Ooh! Ha ha ha.
[Mellow jazz plays.]
Would you kids like to try a sample? Larry: [clears throat.]
That won't be necessary.
One chocolate for Clarence here.
Uh, one vanilla, uh, for Sumo.
What? Who said I liked vanilla? I don't like vanilla.
Don't change it, though.
And one hazelnut for Jeff.
Wait.
How did you know what flavors we wanted? Wrote it down.
So you just write everything down in case it's useful later? W-What? Yeah.
Says right here.
Jeff favorite ice cream hazelnut.
I mean, how do you know what to write down and what to leave out? It's all important.
Oh! And one strawberry! For your sister.
Here you go, sir! That'll be $4.
75! Ah, let's see here, I got a nickel a quarter here, uhh Oh! That one's, uh that's from my collection.
Got a couple of Sacagaweas in there [Indistinct shouting.]
Traffic is huge all the way back to Coolidge.
Cats and dogs from all over Aberdale on the road, caused by what appears to be a confused grandfather and his grandkids.
I'm hearing we have some amateur footage.
Let's check it out! [Singsong voice.]
I love you most! Aaahh! [Tires screech.]
Stay classy, Aberdale.
[Splash!.]
Oh, no, no, no! Oh, shoot.
Huh? Clarence: Uh-oh.
[Laughs.]
Welp.
Come on.
Follow me.
I know I got another one parked somewhere around here.
Um, let's see Oh! Uh-oh.
Pole's already down.
[Slurps.]
[Growling.]
Mm, mmm.
Uh, guys? There's a bus stop right here.
Oh, no, no.
Uh, it says here to keep going.
"Under the barricade.
" [Sumo laughs.]
"Enter park, take a left.
" Hmm.
Oh! So we're going through a bush now.
Great plan.
I mean, sure, he knows what ice cream we like, but does he really know where he's going? Heh! There it is! Found it.
[Raccoon chitters.]
Huh.
And you wanted to take the bus.
[Engine sputtering.]
[Pop!.]
[Whirring.]
[Door opens.]
Hey, mom! I brought you some ice cream! [Gasps.]
Is that a 10-99 form?! - Ooh, streamers! - Clarence, you didn't tell me you were bringing your friends over.
I thought we were gonna go get ice cream Oh! Oh-ho-ho.
And And you brought Larry.
That's that's so nice.
Hi, Larry! - Heh.
How are you? - Hello.
Hey, Mom, you like waffle cones, right? Well, I got you your very own waffle cone! Oh, whoops.
Let me just Oh, Clarence, Clarence, you're you're getting it everywhere.
Here give me that.
Mmm.
- Oh! Strawberry! - Mom, look! Larry's about to try ice cream for the very first time ever.
What? No.
We all ate ice cream at Chuckleton's together, remember? Shh, shh, shh! Just watch! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! [Coughing.]
Mom, I think the ice cream's made of poison.
Raa! You didn't tell me it was going to be cold! It's cold! [Splat!.]
I'll take a nap.
[Door closes.]
Yeah.
It is too cold.