Casual (2015) s02e12 Episode Script
40
1 ALEX: Previously on "Casual" You think you're special? You think you mean something to him? He does that with everyone.
Valerie, he did it with your friend Jennifer.
Did it feel good to get that off your chest? I said what I needed to say.
WOMAN: Feels to me like her anger and yours may be a little misplaced.
I'm not gonna be some stupid social media manager.
All you do is crack jokes.
I mean, this whole day was your idea.
I know.
Then why are you all pissed at me? 'Cause I don't want you to die.
How's Mae-Yi? - In bed? - Yeah, sure.
It was better at first.
No matter how good the sex is, eventually it becomes pat.
Repetition breeds predictability.
[phone chiming.]
So you got a new mattress.
Mae-Yi wanted a softer one.
Wow.
She also wanted "Lilo and Stitch" sheets, but I put my foot down.
Well, good to know.
Must be hard to tell a child no.
[chuckles.]
Do you feel guilty? Yes.
So why don't you stop? Because I can't.
[sighs.]
You always leave so early.
Well, our daughter thinks I'm asleep in the adjoining room.
So when's Mae-Yi back? Tuesday.
Then what? Then I don't know.
Okay.
Hey, Val.
Hmm.
Happy birthday.
[light music.]
[phone ringing.]
Mm.
[phone continues ringing.]
You gonna get that? Nope.
How are you not 300 pounds? A deal with the devil.
I get waffles, he gets my soul.
Sounds like a raw deal.
Laura, I fuckin' love waffles.
It's the birthday girl.
Oh.
Hi, you.
[chuckles.]
- Mm.
- Huh.
What? Thought you'd be more withered.
Aren't you sweet? Hey.
Special birthday batch.
Syrup on the table, fresh orange juice: boom.
Huh? No, thank you.
Oh.
You want powdered sugar? I can do that.
It's more of a French toast thing, but - I can roll with that.
- No, thanks.
I'm just gonna get an egg sandwich on my way in to work.
I'll make you one.
No, thank you.
Just enjoy your waffles.
What's that all about? She wants an egg sandwich.
Not my egg sandwich.
Someone else's egg sandwich.
Fuck.
Why doesn't she want my egg sandwich? Have you said your sorry? Actions speak louder than words.
Have you acted sorry? You think she'd want a surprise party? No.
No, I don't.
Of course it's a bad idea to text the woman you knocked off the wagon, but really, alcoholism is a disease.
And Kim may blame Lisa, but this isn't about Lisa.
Although she did accuse Yolanda of having Munchausen's.
So I mean, who fucking knows what that's about? I'm sorry.
Have you talked about Kim and Lisa before? I'm sure I have.
They're basically the center of the show.
Or at least they were last season.
The show? "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
" [sighs.]
Have you not even been listening? I you know, I thought we were gonna talk about your friends.
Those bitches? Mm-mm.
Fuck them.
Yay! It's your birthday.
[chuckles.]
Thank you.
[party blower inflates.]
Look at that.
[phone beeps.]
Uh.
[phone beeps.]
Yes? DREW: Have lunch with me.
Eh.
Why not? I already went to McDonald's for breakfast.
Ah.
VAL: Yeah.
I had the McGriddle.
I had two of those.
Do you know what those are? They're okay.
It's like a breakfast sandwich with pancakes for bread.
And the pancakes are infused with syrup.
Oh, my god.
It is so amazing.
And yeah, okay.
Fuck it.
Where do you want to go? You know where.
[elevator bell dings.]
Morning.
[sighs.]
Okay.
So what are you in for? Uh, therapy.
Sure.
Sure.
Do you come here a lot? Once a week, twice a week, twice a month? I'm just trying to gauge what's appropriate.
I feel like anything more than once a week is kind of masturbatory.
What's up? It was a simple question.
I don't think she was that offended.
[sighs.]
Okay, Alex.
So I'm throwing Val a party, and you're invited.
So you guys made up? We're working on it.
Hey, will you send me the list of your game night people? I want to cover all the bases.
Alex, you have to talk to her.
I know.
I will.
But today I want to celebrate her.
And she was never happier than when she was with you and your friends.
So Can you help me out, please? If I do, will you stop accosting my patients? [chuckles.]
I will certainly try.
What exactly do you need? Just email me their contacts.
I'll do the inviting.
Okay.
Great.
- Thank you.
- Go away.
Go away.
All right.
[rock music.]
All right, give me a hint.
Okay, uh - It's not BB-8 - Okay.
- Chinese lettering - Yeah.
Or fat O.
J.
So then Heisman O.
J.
's still in play? No, it's no version of O.
J.
in any of his life stages.
Damn.
Come on, it's tattoo roulette.
The surprise is half the fun.
Besides, I'm the one who's gonna have to live with this forever, so stop complaining.
Then you're lucky, 'cause I picked something tight.
Mm, we'll see.
- Mm.
- Is it as good as you remember? Mm, yeah.
It's like a It's like a warm blanket coated in cheese product.
You remember the La Habra Chili's over near Fullerton? Mm, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Ooh, remember the one off the 10 on the way back from Big Bear? Ah.
West Covina.
You make Encino look like Venice.
Used to be this is all it would take to make me happy.
Chili's hasn't gone anywhere.
Except for the Westwood location.
They closed that one.
And the one at LAX is now a fucking Campanile.
Jesus.
It's like hey, man, here we are just living out our lives while some asshole's killing off our precious Chili's.
Our country's lost its innocence.
Yeah.
- [phone rings.]
- Hello? - ALEX: Jack.
- Yeah? Alex Cole.
Val's brother? Hey, man, I'm putting together a little birthday thing for my sister last-minute.
You around? Uh, yeah.
But you know, I haven't talked to Valerie lately.
It's all good.
She'd love to see you.
What do you say: some beers, some friends, ribs on the smoker? Oh, you smoke ribs? ALEX: That I do.
What's your setup? - Big Green Egg, large.
- JACK: Nice.
I got an XL at home and a MiniMax that travels.
ALEX: Nice.
I spatched a chicken on mine a couple weeks ago.
My right arm's completely hairless, but that bird, oh, man.
You don't rock an egg mitt? Dude.
I like to feel the heat.
Okay.
All right.
Um, yeah, what time you firing up? Emojis? They're our emojis.
They're from our first text.
Fuck.
You put a stapler in the middle of my back.
Yeah, Staples Center.
Lakers forever.
I'm gonna get beat up.
These aren't even first generation emojis.
How am I gonna play this for irony? Ah, you can't.
So you just got to pretend like you like it.
You've desecrated my body.
Buy me lunch? Nope.
Got to go to the doctor's.
Drive you home instead? Fine.
It's just different is all I'm saying.
Like different good? You seem adventurous.
Thank you.
You know I really admire their use of the tiny skillet.
Skillet toffee fudge brownie, skillet chocolate chip cookie.
What about me? You notice anything different? Nope.
[inaudible dialogue.]
You're like the Chili's of sex.
Wow.
What I mean is, you're the best sex I've had since you.
Attention, Chili's customers! We have a very special birthday! ALL: Happy, happy birthday from all of us to you Happy, happy birthday, love, the Chili's crew - Whoo! - Happy birthday.
Can we get this in a to-go box, please? - [exhales.]
- Oh, absolutely.
- Whew.
- Ooh.
You know what? I lost my favorite red sunglasses with the little tiny frames.
That's okay.
It's not that bright.
Plus, I only had one drink.
Okay, I had two drinks, which either way, is still very mature for a woman who's 40 to do.
And it's not like anybody gets pulled over during the day, right? Nobody does.
I'll drive.
Okay.
JACK: I think you did the right thing.
ALEX: Yeah.
She didn't give me much of a choice.
Still, you don't you don't move in without a conversation.
Yeah.
I wasn't good to her.
I get so caught up in things, you know? There's this immediacy, this energy.
And then you wake up one day, and it's just gone.
I don't think it's gone.
I think it's just in motion.
That's what the universe does: it cycles energy.
When you get some, you just got to appreciate it for what it is.
Hmm.
I like that.
in the long run, it's probably better for everybody.
Sarah moves on.
You move on.
Mm.
We weren't right for each other.
A lot of people aren't.
It's amazing how many people don't know anything about the person that they're with.
You know who really knows me? My Spotify Discover Weekly playlist.
- Am I right? - Yeah.
- That shit is amazing.
- And totally non-judgmental.
[laughs.]
Yeah.
You want to find true compatibility: cross reference Spotify, Amazon, Postmates, and porn.
And if you synch up on those, that's your person.
That's great.
Good luck coding that.
I could do it.
Yeah? Sure, if I had access to the accounts.
I have a tech guy I work with that loves this kind of stuff, actually.
You should you should float that to him.
Okay.
How are we looking? It's like a medium rare Noah's ark.
Knew it.
This is so delicious.
Oh, my god.
I mean, I hate the word "moist," but I gotta say that's exactly what this is.
This is very moist.
It's it's moist.
Mm! What are we doing? Um I'm I'm sleeping with my ex-husband.
and trying to regain some semblance of control of a life that's increasingly without definition.
You, I have no fuckin' idea.
I made a mistake.
[sighs.]
I want you back.
[scoffs.]
Jesus, Drew.
I'm serious.
[box rustling, squeaking.]
You don't get to do that.
This was fun and terrible.
And when it got too much, we stopped.
That's what this was.
I miss our life.
So did I.
Where are you going? Val? [knock at door.]
Come in.
Guests are arriving.
You know this party is a terrible idea, right? That's the spirit.
[doorbell rings.]
Great group coming, so it'll be fun.
Hi, there.
Oh, my god.
Laura.
I've heard so much about you.
This is so exciting.
Who are you? Leia.
Yeah.
Your mom's assistant.
Oh! Yeah, of course.
Yeah, it's really nice to meet you.
- You too.
- How about a drink? Yes.
Hi, Leon.
Hey, Laura.
Hot birds.
Hot birds coming through.
[indistinct speech.]
Oh, Leon, can I talk to you for a sec? Uh, yeah, of course.
I just want to make sure you're not reading too much into all this.
Into what? Well, Jack offered to come early to help with the food prep.
And I totally would have invited you early too, but we got to talking and the day got away from us, and you understand, right? It's nothing personal.
Don't let it trouble you.
All right, looking good out there.
Probably another 30 for the Boston butt.
Jack.
Leon.
How do you know Val? Well, we almost had a one-night stand.
And and now I'm friends with Alex.
All right.
[doorbell rings.]
Oh, excuse me.
Hey! You made it.
- Mm-hmm.
- You brought a friend.
Yeah, Alex, Sheri.
Sheri, Alex.
Hi, Sheri.
Come on in.
- Thank you.
- Wow, this is intimate.
I'm already uncomfortable.
Is she here yet? No, but food's almost ready, and she should be on the way.
And you invited Jack.
Yeah.
He's great.
Can't believe I never met him before.
Did you go ahead and invite Harry too? Of course not.
Okay.
[inhales deeply.]
What? It's a surprise party.
She will be surprised.
[faint music.]
ALL: Surprise! Oh, my god.
Fuck! [laughs.]
Happy birthday! Hi.
JACK: Hey.
Happy birthday.
- [music playing distantly.]
- Happy birthday.
Why is Jack here? Because I invited him.
Yeah, that much I gathered.
He's fantastic, by the way.
I can tell why you like him.
Did you give my number to the Democrats? - Alex.
- Look.
I know I came between you guys and I can tell you were good together, so this is my way of saying I'm sorry; that I approve.
I don't need your approval.
I I a simple apology would have done just fine.
I like to think actions speak louder than words.
Fuck.
It's a fun party.
Have you seen those hairy babies that don't lose their hair before they come out? [sighs.]
I'm sorry, man.
She's that upset about it? Dude, I know.
Jennifer? That was three years ago.
You know that; I know that, but Val's old-school.
She slept with one guy for, like, 20 years.
Oh, that'd be great if she could just talk to me about it.
- We could bury this.
- Totally.
But maybe tonight's not the night.
Okay, yeah.
[rock music playing.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
How you doing? I'm okay.
- How are you? - [both laugh.]
Hangin' in.
That's good.
So I'm leaving, I guess.
What? Yeah, your brother just talked to me.
I mean, I get it, sort of.
He asked you to leave? Pretty much.
Wait.
I'm sorry.
I think no, I think he misunderstood me.
I just I was I was surprised is all.
I didn't expect to see you, and here you are and just so yeah.
I think you should stay.
Will you stay? It's a party.
Are you sure? Yeah.
There's not a lot of people here.
Right? And there's so much meat.
- So - All right.
Can I make you a drink? Or something? [glass clinking.]
Hi, everyone.
Um, come on in here, a little closer.
I just wanted to say a few words.
I know it's silly and sentimental, but if there's any day for it Valerie.
I've learned so much from you, and I am so honored to be here tonight.
Thank you.
That's very There's a poem that I've always wanted to share with you.
And this seems as good a time as any.
It's called "Love After Love.
" The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other's welcome, and say, sit here.
Eat.
[quietly.]
Excuse me.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Oh, my god, this party is tragic.
SPENCER: Laura.
It's like a dog kicking contest.
Well, okay, it's not that bad.
Will you just listen? We need bodies ASAP.
It worked.
What worked? My trial.
I went to the doctor's.
They ran some tests, and it's shrinking.
I'll, uh, come to you.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf [whispers.]
He's fine, but I have to go.
Peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit.
Feast on your life.
Thank you, that was lovely.
[cheers and applause.]
So lovely.
- Who's ready for some food? - Yeah.
[indistinct speech.]
[whispers.]
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Yeah.
[plaintive music.]
[doorbell rings.]
[plaintive music continues.]
Your mom gonna be mad you bailed? Nah.
I think she'll understand.
She hates birthdays anyway.
When's yours? December 27th.
- 18? - Mm-hmm.
Oh, we should go big.
No.
Ugh.
People who make big deals out of birthdays freak me out.
[chuckles.]
Like, why can't you just celebrate every day? Okay.
Go low-key for 18 but big for 19 or 20.
Take a trip around the world or some shit.
We can do anything.
[laughter.]
Can you get intoxicated off of sausages? These are so good.
Boy, they are intoxicating.
I wouldn't argue with that.
So when is the dance party? I've been practicing my '90s hip-hop if you want to duet with me.
Oh, right, yeah.
No, thank you.
Really? Well, it's a practical skill, so I can use it elsewhere, I guess.
You didn't think I'd want to know about Honestly, I thought you did.
Nope.
That's just how this group is.
We're all close.
Oh, are there are there others in your group? Sheri? - Sheri? - Huh? Have you had sex with Jack? Recently? I don't know.
Is he the father? - [laughter.]
- What? No way.
Look at that neck.
- [laughter.]
- Look at this.
I don't want that coming out of me.
I'm very insecure about that.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, well, better your neck than my eyebrows.
Oh, my god.
Are we going there again? I think your eyebrows are good.
Those are good eyebrows, very expressive.
I wish I had expressive eyebrows like that.
Jack, Jack.
Now you're just lying to my face.
- No.
- You guys are being ridiculous.
Your flaws aren't flaws.
My flaws are very much flaws, thank you very much.
Mine too.
I mean, I know your flaws are flaws.
- My god.
- You're full of flaws.
Wait, can you meet at 11:00 tomorrow? That tech guy, he wants to talk to you about the Spotify porn match idea.
- Yeah.
- What? Really? Text the guy.
I pitched him earlier.
I didn't think you were actually gonna write it.
- What, what is it? - It sounds awesome.
It's a food, music Guys.
Cake.
I almost forgot.
We have cake, and this party needs it.
- Okay.
- Cake.
Did you set him up with Cody? - Yeah, yeah.
- Oh, I love Cody.
Jennifer, what did you mean when you said you know about his flaws? Nothing.
I nothing.
I mean, he's come to the office a couple times, and we've talked.
I assumed he was actually looking for you.
Are you fucking him? Am I [laughs.]
No.
- No.
- Okay.
ALL: Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Little louder.
ALL: Happy birthday, dear Val Um, these people are here for you, so enjoy your cake.
Where are you going? I'm going home.
To Drew.
My car is at Chili's.
I'll drive.
Thank you.
[doorbell ringing.]
Val, wait.
Hi.
Is there another entrance that doesn't have stairs? What? For the gurney.
You're Alex Cole, Valerie Meyers? Yeah.
They said they had some trouble reaching you.
I this is my biggest fear, that you go through the whole thing, show up at the door, and wrong house.
[laughs.]
What is going on? Uh, we have your father outside.
Just need to find a way of bringing him in.
Maybe through the garage.
Lock all the doors, Val.
Hey, guys, let's try down the driveway.
I'll be right up to help.
Oh.
Happy birthday.
[Margo Guryan's "What Can I Give You" playing.]
Oh, god.
Fuck.
What can I give you What would make you happy What can I do What can I say To make the bad times go away It's been a long, long time Since I've seen you smile And I've been wanting to do something about it For a long, real long while What can I give you To drive away the sadness What can I buy What can I try Tell me what I can do It's been a long, long time And you know I knew you when You used to be happy
Valerie, he did it with your friend Jennifer.
Did it feel good to get that off your chest? I said what I needed to say.
WOMAN: Feels to me like her anger and yours may be a little misplaced.
I'm not gonna be some stupid social media manager.
All you do is crack jokes.
I mean, this whole day was your idea.
I know.
Then why are you all pissed at me? 'Cause I don't want you to die.
How's Mae-Yi? - In bed? - Yeah, sure.
It was better at first.
No matter how good the sex is, eventually it becomes pat.
Repetition breeds predictability.
[phone chiming.]
So you got a new mattress.
Mae-Yi wanted a softer one.
Wow.
She also wanted "Lilo and Stitch" sheets, but I put my foot down.
Well, good to know.
Must be hard to tell a child no.
[chuckles.]
Do you feel guilty? Yes.
So why don't you stop? Because I can't.
[sighs.]
You always leave so early.
Well, our daughter thinks I'm asleep in the adjoining room.
So when's Mae-Yi back? Tuesday.
Then what? Then I don't know.
Okay.
Hey, Val.
Hmm.
Happy birthday.
[light music.]
[phone ringing.]
Mm.
[phone continues ringing.]
You gonna get that? Nope.
How are you not 300 pounds? A deal with the devil.
I get waffles, he gets my soul.
Sounds like a raw deal.
Laura, I fuckin' love waffles.
It's the birthday girl.
Oh.
Hi, you.
[chuckles.]
- Mm.
- Huh.
What? Thought you'd be more withered.
Aren't you sweet? Hey.
Special birthday batch.
Syrup on the table, fresh orange juice: boom.
Huh? No, thank you.
Oh.
You want powdered sugar? I can do that.
It's more of a French toast thing, but - I can roll with that.
- No, thanks.
I'm just gonna get an egg sandwich on my way in to work.
I'll make you one.
No, thank you.
Just enjoy your waffles.
What's that all about? She wants an egg sandwich.
Not my egg sandwich.
Someone else's egg sandwich.
Fuck.
Why doesn't she want my egg sandwich? Have you said your sorry? Actions speak louder than words.
Have you acted sorry? You think she'd want a surprise party? No.
No, I don't.
Of course it's a bad idea to text the woman you knocked off the wagon, but really, alcoholism is a disease.
And Kim may blame Lisa, but this isn't about Lisa.
Although she did accuse Yolanda of having Munchausen's.
So I mean, who fucking knows what that's about? I'm sorry.
Have you talked about Kim and Lisa before? I'm sure I have.
They're basically the center of the show.
Or at least they were last season.
The show? "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
" [sighs.]
Have you not even been listening? I you know, I thought we were gonna talk about your friends.
Those bitches? Mm-mm.
Fuck them.
Yay! It's your birthday.
[chuckles.]
Thank you.
[party blower inflates.]
Look at that.
[phone beeps.]
Uh.
[phone beeps.]
Yes? DREW: Have lunch with me.
Eh.
Why not? I already went to McDonald's for breakfast.
Ah.
VAL: Yeah.
I had the McGriddle.
I had two of those.
Do you know what those are? They're okay.
It's like a breakfast sandwich with pancakes for bread.
And the pancakes are infused with syrup.
Oh, my god.
It is so amazing.
And yeah, okay.
Fuck it.
Where do you want to go? You know where.
[elevator bell dings.]
Morning.
[sighs.]
Okay.
So what are you in for? Uh, therapy.
Sure.
Sure.
Do you come here a lot? Once a week, twice a week, twice a month? I'm just trying to gauge what's appropriate.
I feel like anything more than once a week is kind of masturbatory.
What's up? It was a simple question.
I don't think she was that offended.
[sighs.]
Okay, Alex.
So I'm throwing Val a party, and you're invited.
So you guys made up? We're working on it.
Hey, will you send me the list of your game night people? I want to cover all the bases.
Alex, you have to talk to her.
I know.
I will.
But today I want to celebrate her.
And she was never happier than when she was with you and your friends.
So Can you help me out, please? If I do, will you stop accosting my patients? [chuckles.]
I will certainly try.
What exactly do you need? Just email me their contacts.
I'll do the inviting.
Okay.
Great.
- Thank you.
- Go away.
Go away.
All right.
[rock music.]
All right, give me a hint.
Okay, uh - It's not BB-8 - Okay.
- Chinese lettering - Yeah.
Or fat O.
J.
So then Heisman O.
J.
's still in play? No, it's no version of O.
J.
in any of his life stages.
Damn.
Come on, it's tattoo roulette.
The surprise is half the fun.
Besides, I'm the one who's gonna have to live with this forever, so stop complaining.
Then you're lucky, 'cause I picked something tight.
Mm, we'll see.
- Mm.
- Is it as good as you remember? Mm, yeah.
It's like a It's like a warm blanket coated in cheese product.
You remember the La Habra Chili's over near Fullerton? Mm, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Ooh, remember the one off the 10 on the way back from Big Bear? Ah.
West Covina.
You make Encino look like Venice.
Used to be this is all it would take to make me happy.
Chili's hasn't gone anywhere.
Except for the Westwood location.
They closed that one.
And the one at LAX is now a fucking Campanile.
Jesus.
It's like hey, man, here we are just living out our lives while some asshole's killing off our precious Chili's.
Our country's lost its innocence.
Yeah.
- [phone rings.]
- Hello? - ALEX: Jack.
- Yeah? Alex Cole.
Val's brother? Hey, man, I'm putting together a little birthday thing for my sister last-minute.
You around? Uh, yeah.
But you know, I haven't talked to Valerie lately.
It's all good.
She'd love to see you.
What do you say: some beers, some friends, ribs on the smoker? Oh, you smoke ribs? ALEX: That I do.
What's your setup? - Big Green Egg, large.
- JACK: Nice.
I got an XL at home and a MiniMax that travels.
ALEX: Nice.
I spatched a chicken on mine a couple weeks ago.
My right arm's completely hairless, but that bird, oh, man.
You don't rock an egg mitt? Dude.
I like to feel the heat.
Okay.
All right.
Um, yeah, what time you firing up? Emojis? They're our emojis.
They're from our first text.
Fuck.
You put a stapler in the middle of my back.
Yeah, Staples Center.
Lakers forever.
I'm gonna get beat up.
These aren't even first generation emojis.
How am I gonna play this for irony? Ah, you can't.
So you just got to pretend like you like it.
You've desecrated my body.
Buy me lunch? Nope.
Got to go to the doctor's.
Drive you home instead? Fine.
It's just different is all I'm saying.
Like different good? You seem adventurous.
Thank you.
You know I really admire their use of the tiny skillet.
Skillet toffee fudge brownie, skillet chocolate chip cookie.
What about me? You notice anything different? Nope.
[inaudible dialogue.]
You're like the Chili's of sex.
Wow.
What I mean is, you're the best sex I've had since you.
Attention, Chili's customers! We have a very special birthday! ALL: Happy, happy birthday from all of us to you Happy, happy birthday, love, the Chili's crew - Whoo! - Happy birthday.
Can we get this in a to-go box, please? - [exhales.]
- Oh, absolutely.
- Whew.
- Ooh.
You know what? I lost my favorite red sunglasses with the little tiny frames.
That's okay.
It's not that bright.
Plus, I only had one drink.
Okay, I had two drinks, which either way, is still very mature for a woman who's 40 to do.
And it's not like anybody gets pulled over during the day, right? Nobody does.
I'll drive.
Okay.
JACK: I think you did the right thing.
ALEX: Yeah.
She didn't give me much of a choice.
Still, you don't you don't move in without a conversation.
Yeah.
I wasn't good to her.
I get so caught up in things, you know? There's this immediacy, this energy.
And then you wake up one day, and it's just gone.
I don't think it's gone.
I think it's just in motion.
That's what the universe does: it cycles energy.
When you get some, you just got to appreciate it for what it is.
Hmm.
I like that.
in the long run, it's probably better for everybody.
Sarah moves on.
You move on.
Mm.
We weren't right for each other.
A lot of people aren't.
It's amazing how many people don't know anything about the person that they're with.
You know who really knows me? My Spotify Discover Weekly playlist.
- Am I right? - Yeah.
- That shit is amazing.
- And totally non-judgmental.
[laughs.]
Yeah.
You want to find true compatibility: cross reference Spotify, Amazon, Postmates, and porn.
And if you synch up on those, that's your person.
That's great.
Good luck coding that.
I could do it.
Yeah? Sure, if I had access to the accounts.
I have a tech guy I work with that loves this kind of stuff, actually.
You should you should float that to him.
Okay.
How are we looking? It's like a medium rare Noah's ark.
Knew it.
This is so delicious.
Oh, my god.
I mean, I hate the word "moist," but I gotta say that's exactly what this is.
This is very moist.
It's it's moist.
Mm! What are we doing? Um I'm I'm sleeping with my ex-husband.
and trying to regain some semblance of control of a life that's increasingly without definition.
You, I have no fuckin' idea.
I made a mistake.
[sighs.]
I want you back.
[scoffs.]
Jesus, Drew.
I'm serious.
[box rustling, squeaking.]
You don't get to do that.
This was fun and terrible.
And when it got too much, we stopped.
That's what this was.
I miss our life.
So did I.
Where are you going? Val? [knock at door.]
Come in.
Guests are arriving.
You know this party is a terrible idea, right? That's the spirit.
[doorbell rings.]
Great group coming, so it'll be fun.
Hi, there.
Oh, my god.
Laura.
I've heard so much about you.
This is so exciting.
Who are you? Leia.
Yeah.
Your mom's assistant.
Oh! Yeah, of course.
Yeah, it's really nice to meet you.
- You too.
- How about a drink? Yes.
Hi, Leon.
Hey, Laura.
Hot birds.
Hot birds coming through.
[indistinct speech.]
Oh, Leon, can I talk to you for a sec? Uh, yeah, of course.
I just want to make sure you're not reading too much into all this.
Into what? Well, Jack offered to come early to help with the food prep.
And I totally would have invited you early too, but we got to talking and the day got away from us, and you understand, right? It's nothing personal.
Don't let it trouble you.
All right, looking good out there.
Probably another 30 for the Boston butt.
Jack.
Leon.
How do you know Val? Well, we almost had a one-night stand.
And and now I'm friends with Alex.
All right.
[doorbell rings.]
Oh, excuse me.
Hey! You made it.
- Mm-hmm.
- You brought a friend.
Yeah, Alex, Sheri.
Sheri, Alex.
Hi, Sheri.
Come on in.
- Thank you.
- Wow, this is intimate.
I'm already uncomfortable.
Is she here yet? No, but food's almost ready, and she should be on the way.
And you invited Jack.
Yeah.
He's great.
Can't believe I never met him before.
Did you go ahead and invite Harry too? Of course not.
Okay.
[inhales deeply.]
What? It's a surprise party.
She will be surprised.
[faint music.]
ALL: Surprise! Oh, my god.
Fuck! [laughs.]
Happy birthday! Hi.
JACK: Hey.
Happy birthday.
- [music playing distantly.]
- Happy birthday.
Why is Jack here? Because I invited him.
Yeah, that much I gathered.
He's fantastic, by the way.
I can tell why you like him.
Did you give my number to the Democrats? - Alex.
- Look.
I know I came between you guys and I can tell you were good together, so this is my way of saying I'm sorry; that I approve.
I don't need your approval.
I I a simple apology would have done just fine.
I like to think actions speak louder than words.
Fuck.
It's a fun party.
Have you seen those hairy babies that don't lose their hair before they come out? [sighs.]
I'm sorry, man.
She's that upset about it? Dude, I know.
Jennifer? That was three years ago.
You know that; I know that, but Val's old-school.
She slept with one guy for, like, 20 years.
Oh, that'd be great if she could just talk to me about it.
- We could bury this.
- Totally.
But maybe tonight's not the night.
Okay, yeah.
[rock music playing.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
How you doing? I'm okay.
- How are you? - [both laugh.]
Hangin' in.
That's good.
So I'm leaving, I guess.
What? Yeah, your brother just talked to me.
I mean, I get it, sort of.
He asked you to leave? Pretty much.
Wait.
I'm sorry.
I think no, I think he misunderstood me.
I just I was I was surprised is all.
I didn't expect to see you, and here you are and just so yeah.
I think you should stay.
Will you stay? It's a party.
Are you sure? Yeah.
There's not a lot of people here.
Right? And there's so much meat.
- So - All right.
Can I make you a drink? Or something? [glass clinking.]
Hi, everyone.
Um, come on in here, a little closer.
I just wanted to say a few words.
I know it's silly and sentimental, but if there's any day for it Valerie.
I've learned so much from you, and I am so honored to be here tonight.
Thank you.
That's very There's a poem that I've always wanted to share with you.
And this seems as good a time as any.
It's called "Love After Love.
" The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other's welcome, and say, sit here.
Eat.
[quietly.]
Excuse me.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Oh, my god, this party is tragic.
SPENCER: Laura.
It's like a dog kicking contest.
Well, okay, it's not that bad.
Will you just listen? We need bodies ASAP.
It worked.
What worked? My trial.
I went to the doctor's.
They ran some tests, and it's shrinking.
I'll, uh, come to you.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf [whispers.]
He's fine, but I have to go.
Peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit.
Feast on your life.
Thank you, that was lovely.
[cheers and applause.]
So lovely.
- Who's ready for some food? - Yeah.
[indistinct speech.]
[whispers.]
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Yeah.
[plaintive music.]
[doorbell rings.]
[plaintive music continues.]
Your mom gonna be mad you bailed? Nah.
I think she'll understand.
She hates birthdays anyway.
When's yours? December 27th.
- 18? - Mm-hmm.
Oh, we should go big.
No.
Ugh.
People who make big deals out of birthdays freak me out.
[chuckles.]
Like, why can't you just celebrate every day? Okay.
Go low-key for 18 but big for 19 or 20.
Take a trip around the world or some shit.
We can do anything.
[laughter.]
Can you get intoxicated off of sausages? These are so good.
Boy, they are intoxicating.
I wouldn't argue with that.
So when is the dance party? I've been practicing my '90s hip-hop if you want to duet with me.
Oh, right, yeah.
No, thank you.
Really? Well, it's a practical skill, so I can use it elsewhere, I guess.
You didn't think I'd want to know about Honestly, I thought you did.
Nope.
That's just how this group is.
We're all close.
Oh, are there are there others in your group? Sheri? - Sheri? - Huh? Have you had sex with Jack? Recently? I don't know.
Is he the father? - [laughter.]
- What? No way.
Look at that neck.
- [laughter.]
- Look at this.
I don't want that coming out of me.
I'm very insecure about that.
Thank you very much.
Yeah, well, better your neck than my eyebrows.
Oh, my god.
Are we going there again? I think your eyebrows are good.
Those are good eyebrows, very expressive.
I wish I had expressive eyebrows like that.
Jack, Jack.
Now you're just lying to my face.
- No.
- You guys are being ridiculous.
Your flaws aren't flaws.
My flaws are very much flaws, thank you very much.
Mine too.
I mean, I know your flaws are flaws.
- My god.
- You're full of flaws.
Wait, can you meet at 11:00 tomorrow? That tech guy, he wants to talk to you about the Spotify porn match idea.
- Yeah.
- What? Really? Text the guy.
I pitched him earlier.
I didn't think you were actually gonna write it.
- What, what is it? - It sounds awesome.
It's a food, music Guys.
Cake.
I almost forgot.
We have cake, and this party needs it.
- Okay.
- Cake.
Did you set him up with Cody? - Yeah, yeah.
- Oh, I love Cody.
Jennifer, what did you mean when you said you know about his flaws? Nothing.
I nothing.
I mean, he's come to the office a couple times, and we've talked.
I assumed he was actually looking for you.
Are you fucking him? Am I [laughs.]
No.
- No.
- Okay.
ALL: Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Little louder.
ALL: Happy birthday, dear Val Um, these people are here for you, so enjoy your cake.
Where are you going? I'm going home.
To Drew.
My car is at Chili's.
I'll drive.
Thank you.
[doorbell ringing.]
Val, wait.
Hi.
Is there another entrance that doesn't have stairs? What? For the gurney.
You're Alex Cole, Valerie Meyers? Yeah.
They said they had some trouble reaching you.
I this is my biggest fear, that you go through the whole thing, show up at the door, and wrong house.
[laughs.]
What is going on? Uh, we have your father outside.
Just need to find a way of bringing him in.
Maybe through the garage.
Lock all the doors, Val.
Hey, guys, let's try down the driveway.
I'll be right up to help.
Oh.
Happy birthday.
[Margo Guryan's "What Can I Give You" playing.]
Oh, god.
Fuck.
What can I give you What would make you happy What can I do What can I say To make the bad times go away It's been a long, long time Since I've seen you smile And I've been wanting to do something about it For a long, real long while What can I give you To drive away the sadness What can I buy What can I try Tell me what I can do It's been a long, long time And you know I knew you when You used to be happy