Dawn of the Croods (2015) s02e12 Episode Script

1 Bom-bom, bom-ba-dum Ma-ma-ma-bom-ba-dum Ba-da-dum - Rock-o.
- [all.]
Stone-o.
Rock-o.
[all.]
Stone-o.
Rock-o.
[all.]
Stone-o.
Rock-o.
[groans.]
Womp is the worst at this game.
He is the best at being the worst.
Rock-o.
[all.]
Stone-o.
[growling.]
Aha, I got you now.
Rock-o.
[both.]
Giant wart frog! You're supposed to say "stone-o.
" You guys are, like, the worst at this game.
[gasping.]
[Eep.]
It's Rad, the death guard.
[groaning.]
Hey, here, little dude.
Try this way.
Uh, you're staring at Rad the way I stare at you.
It's pretty creepy.
[sighs.]
It's just, Rad's so rad.
[laughs.]
If she hadn't been there, Womp would've been eaten.
All while we just stood here, watching the horror unfold.
[giggling.]
Well, I don't wanna stand around anymore.
I want to be like Rad.
She gets to do such cool stuff and everyone loves her.
[sighing.]
Rad! Rad! Eep Crood.
Big fan.
I have to ask you something.
Um, and if you say no, I'll just die.
Not on my watch.
See? That is exactly what I wanna do.
Oh, say cool stuff like that.
Please, teach me to be a death guard like you.
You can't learn to be a death guard.
You're just born that way.
[wind blowing.]
But sure, I'll teach you.
Really? Oh, my bonk! Ha ha! I'm gonna be a hero.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Please.
Two "thank you's" was enough.
When you're a death guard, every breath counts.
Good tip.
Thank you.
I mean [inhaling.]
[grunting.]
There.
Now our disgusting trash is outside in nature, where it belongs.
[snarling.]
[gasps.]
[yelping.]
Let me go, let me go! [sniffing.]
[barking.]
Whoa, what's wrong, Sandy? [sniffing.]
[barking.]
Oh, that's not gonna hurt ya.
It's just a rock, see? Same kind we use to bonk and bludgeon.
Oh, hey, you found my snack meat.
I lost this ages ago.
Pretty strong sniffer you've got there.
[barking.]
[sniffing.]
[continues sniffing.]
[barking.]
Here, girl? [giggles.]
[gasps.]
Bear owl teeth! We never see these, unless they're tearing you apart.
[roaring.]
Hey, neighbor.
- What you got there? - Oh, nothing.
My daughter's just a treasure-finding force of nature.
How are you? [sniffing.]
Come on, Papa wants a new carcass.
Treasure, huh? Ready to earn your keep, Cliff? No, thumbs are for finders, so let's go find some treasure.
You are gonna be a great death guard, Eep, but if you need more practice, I'm willing to fake-die for you right here, any time you want.
[gasping.]
Thanks, Lerk.
Well, I'm off to save lives and high fives.
Oh, my bad, Eep.
Didn't see you.
I was just rinsing off this slak goo.
Anyway, ready for your first extreme death guarding task? Yeah! Ha ha! What is it? Rinsing off this slak goo.
There's an extreme amount of it.
Oh, let me guess.
We've gotta be super careful because it's poisonous.
[gasps.]
If we touch it, we'll die.
No, it's basically purple snot, but we don't want people to fall.
[grunts.]
Oh.
Well, that's less exciting.
Well, death guarding is all about preventing death.
That, and waiting for the perfect wave.
[wind blowing.]
What are we staring at? Destiny.
But until then, purple snot.
[grunting.]
Okay, there.
Done.
Now, uh, let's go save some lives in a dramatic fashion.
Not yet.
See, mudscreen protects us against the sun by tricking it into thinking we're the ground.
- Yoo-hoo.
- [gasping.]
Behold the Root.
It's gonna need at least three coats.
Hah! There.
Seaweed is all sorted.
And now to mix it back together.
[laughs.]
Sometimes I wonder why we even do this.
[groans.]
- [panicked cries.]
- [gasps.]
Are those panicked cries for help? Finally! Ha ha! I mean, coming.
[screaming.]
Aw, please don't tell me you had an accident.
Uh, no.
It was on purpose.
[giggling.]
- [sniffing.]
- Excellent sniffing, Sandy.
Just look at all these treasures.
Eggs, bones, more eggs, whatever this is.
I don't know if I'm supposed to wear it or eat it or Oh! Or neither.
[gasps, sniffing.]
Another scent? Under that rock? That a girl, Sandy! Good job, Cliff! Hey, hey, we sniffed that first.
Sure, it's a very small pelt, but you never know what'll look good on.
Uh-uh.
Finders keepers, losers losers.
Oh, is this blood? Fancy.
[sniffing.]
Oh, ha! You're not gonna get my treasure this time! But we are.
Some people are so desperate.
Onward, brother.
- [laughing.]
- [Squawk.]
I expect results, baby.
Great job today, Eep.
You're really starting to look like a death guard.
I'm definitely feeling dead.
And I've saved the most extreme task for last.
[groans.]
Should I even bother getting my hopes up? Watching the turmel.
Good-bye, hopes.
Gotta watch out for him.
He's the biggest threat to the watering hole there is.
[screaming.]
[grunting.]
Hey, we're watching you.
Keep an eye on him till I get back.
I gotta go sort that seaweed again.
[groans.]
Why did I sign up for this again? [yawns.]
You're obviously not going anywhere.
[sighs.]
Maybe I can whip up some death-guarding excitement in my dreams.
Let's see.
Sulk in the deep end, about to be devoured.
Ho ho, let's do this.
[yawns.]
[growling.]
This is so unfair.
All these treasures should be mine.
[sniffing, gasps.]
[growling.]
Sorry, ours.
I didn't forget about your finder's fee.
[gasps, sniffing.]
Wow.
They must smell something rank.
It's mine! No! We can't let 'em get there first, Sandy, whatever it takes.
[cries out.]
[groaning.]
- [gasps.]
- Smell that? It's fear.
- [snarling.]
- [screams.]
[grunts.]
[spits.]
Ah, ha ha! We did it! It's ours! The best treasure of all.
Huh? Our trash! Aw, gross! - Ours! - I also would like this.
[grunts.]
Mine! - What am I doing, Sandy? - [Squawk.]
Mine, mine, mine! I don't need any junk.
I've got everything I need right here.
Plus, I totally grabbed this from Teena when she wasn't looking.
[chortling.]
I look fierce.
Guys, guys, I know.
I'm a great death guard.
But don't you think you've high-fived me enough? No? Okay.
[laughing.]
[Lerk.]
Eep, help! There's trouble in the watering hole.
And we can't find Rad.
We need a death guard.
Trouble? And I'm awake? [chuckling.]
I'm on it! [grunting.]
[groans.]
Where's all the water? What happened? [Lerk.]
It's a mystery.
Can we really explain how anything in this crazy life works? We may just need to accept that we'll never know.
Or it was that.
[sighing.]
Man, somebody should've kept an eye on that thing.
Turmel.
I thought we had an understanding.
[belching.]
[sighs.]
You're right.
This is on me.
I gotta get you to spit this water out before Rad gets back.
[sighing.]
Death guard is here and I got this under control.
[crowd.]
Eep, Eep, Eep, Eep, Eep, Eep.
Finally, my moment.
Wow, that was easy.
[giggling.]
Especially for a plan I barely thought out.
Turmel wave! [gasps.]
[screaming.]
[gasps.]
[grunting.]
- [yelping.]
- [grunting.]
[gurgling.]
[yelping.]
[panicked cries.]
- [giggling.]
- [yelping.]
Can't believe I missed the perfect wave.
Bummer.
Maybe I didn't need to mix that seaweed a third time.
Well, small stuff can be just as important as the big, exciting stuff.
[chuckles.]
And less terrifying.
I think I finally get what death guarding is all about.
Gnarly.
Then you can train our new recruit.
Behold the Root.
[groans, grunting.]
[sighs.]
Looks like I got more work to do.
Great, 'cause I could also use another coat of mudscreen.
[Ugga sighs.]
Another beautiful day.
- The sun is shining, the prey is dying.
- [groaning.]
And the Gran is bored! [moaning.]
Why don't you go to gardening club? [scoffs.]
No, thanks.
It's gonna rain.
I can feel it in my bones.
[joints cracking.]
- That crack says we're gettin' rain.
- [cracking.]
Make that heavy rain, - with cloud burps and - [cracking.]
lightning.
Point is, rain is boring! So do dumb stuff for my amusement.
Sorry.
If it's gonna rain, I gotta get gathering right away.
Fine.
But at least get that spider ant off your back.
[screaming.]
[chuckles.]
[groaning.]
Mom! I don't care if you're bored, you shouldn't mess with people for fun.
Only for personal gain.
Got it! No.
One of these days, it's gonna get you in a lot of trouble.
[gasping.]
That spider ant is back! - [screams.]
- [cackling.]
[growling.]
I [groaning.]
[cackling.]
Oh, don't go.
Now what? You can't have a good time without a victim.
[humming.]
Well, I'm off to the hunt! Not sure why I just yelled that! Or that! Huntin', eh? Hope you're takin' an extra pelt 'cause it's gonna rain.
Also because that one's hideous.
Please.
I know I'm dressed to kill prey.
Besides, it's a beautiful day out.
[cackling.]
How did you know it was gonna rain? - Oh, it's just my - [cracking.]
my my power.
Yep, this old gal can control the weather.
Since when? Since I had a dream last night that I could and this morning it was true.
Pfft.
I had a dream about you moving out, and that never comes true.
Fine.
I'll prove it.
[cracking.]
With a cloud burp.
[thunder rumbling.]
[screams.]
Stay away from me! Even further than usual! [yelping.]
[cackling.]
Today's weather will be cloudy with a chance of giggles.
[giggling.]
Oh, no, the monster's sneaking up behind her! Turn around! I can't watch.
[groaning.]
- [wind howling.]
- Aw, not now.
[sighs.]
- Guess we could go catch raindrops.
- [thunder rumbling.]
Go outside in the storm? No, no, I don't think so, because, uh [thunder rumbling.]
'cause, uh, I'm worried about how scared Sandy must be.
[howling.]
She seems terrified.
But fine, we can stay in if you want.
Just don't blame me when you get cave brain.
- Cave brain? - Yeah.
When you stay inside too long, it messes with your head.
It makes you act weird and unpredictable.
[moaning.]
[cheering.]
Which I guess wouldn't be all that different for you.
Seriously, you guys, Gran just waved her hand and it was like, "kablow, sploom", and I was, like [screaming.]
Until my butt itched and I stopped to go [sighing.]
And Forget that last part.
No one boss of weather.
Grug just scared of old lady.
Hey, who said I was scared? - Hi, Grug.
- [shrieking.]
[laughing.]
Old lady right to laugh at Grug.
Old lady lower on food chain than chickuna.
Is Amber right or what? [laughter.]
Oh, yeah, One-Eyes? This old lady says cluck like a chickuna, now! [chuckling.]
Old lady funny.
Now complete high five Amber started.
Don't leave Amber hanging.
- I said cluck, or I'll - [cracking.]
or I'll strike you with lightning.
[thunder rumbling.]
[clucking.]
Now, Grug, juggle these two chickuna.
But I work with these people.
[murmuring.]
[sighing.]
- [groaning.]
- [laughing.]
Oh, yeah! Now this is entertainment! Oh, but I wanna go bigger.
Chickuna fight.
[grunting.]
Just fall over so this ends.
You want Amber take dive? [grunting.]
- [screams.]
- [squeals.]
Sing me a pretty song.
Uh This is a pretty song Won't you sing along? This is our pretty song We'll sing about pretty things all day long - Yeah! - Prettier.
And dance.
Flowers, sunshine, bloody prey But none are so pretty as Gran today [grunting.]
[Thunk.]
Look at that, a tie.
[groaning.]
Of course it's a tie.
Every game of Stick, Stack, Stone has been a tie.
- [snoring.]
- So far.
But something tells me that's all about to change.
No! I can't take it anymore! - We gotta go outside.
- Outside? [thunder rumbling.]
Please don't leave me alone.
We can play any game you want.
Mmm.
I know a game.
[chuckling.]
It's called "hunter-prey.
" How about we play "hide and go hide some more"? - [yelps.]
- [thunder rumbling.]
[all.]
All praise the mother of the storm! All praise the mother of the storm! Great.
Now just those worthy of kissin' my feet.
That's right.
None of you are worthy.
Mom? Why are people bowing to you? Nope, I'm just gonna skip to the end.
No touch Mother of Storm, or Mother of Storm punish us with weather powers! - Who? - The Rider of Lightning.
The Master of Rain.
- The Breaker of Wind.
- [fart squeaks.]
Hear me roar.
Mom, what did I say about messing with people? Guys, my mother can't control the weather.
Her joints are just Silence the unbeliever.
- [growling.]
- [screams.]
[grunting.]
[shrieking.]
- [muffled yelling.]
- [shouting.]
Guys, Ugga's my wife.
Do we have to do this? Amber always say, better to err on side of shoving people in logs.
- [grunting.]
- [muffled yelling.]
Mother of Storm, please not judge followers for Ugga disrespect.
Oh, don't be afraid, child.
As long as you do all the dumb stuff I say, I'll never hurt you.
- [cracking.]
- Huh? [tornado howling.]
I was the best Womp I could be! Okay, that was my bad.
[chuckles.]
I won't let that happen again.
- [joints cracking.]
- [screaming.]
Gran, we did everything you asked.
Why are you making the storm worse? Well, I wouldn't say it's worse.
[screams.]
Uh, he knows why that happened.
The old woman cannot be appeased.
If Gran not stop rain, we stop Gran.
- [hair buzzing.]
- [gasping.]
Uh, hey, guys, wait.
This is my wife's mother we're talking about.
Use this one.
Wait! Stop! I uh Okay, you got me.
I I can't control the weather.
It was just tricks.
You see, changes in weather make my joints act up.
Yeah.
Nice try.
But Grug Crood does not fall for such obvious lies.
Everybody get the magic weather queen! [screaming.]
[shrieking.]
All right, Thunk, I'll give you to the count of [screams.]
[grunting.]
Uh, uh, you don't wanna hunt me.
You deserve more of a challenge.
- Eh, I'll make do.
- [shrieking.]
Eep, you have cave brain.
You need to go outside.
Cave brain? Pfft! [cackling.]
I'm fine.
Now hold still so I can bonk you.
[Thunk shrieks.]
[screaming.]
[Eep.]
Thunk.
Thunk! - Come play with your sister.
- [yelping.]
[giggling.]
[shrieking.]
- [grunting.]
- [laughing.]
- [roaring.]
- [screams.]
[thunder rumbling.]
Huh? What happened? Ohh! [sighs.]
Cave brain.
Thunk, I am so sorry.
[nervous chuckle.]
It's okay.
And, hey, I'm not scared of the storm anymore.
- [chickuna clucking.]
- In fact, this is sorta nice.
[thunder rumbling.]
Actually, no.
This is horrifying.
[screaming.]
[grunting.]
Ha! Control the weather? [laughs.]
Gran can barely control when she has to go Pee-ople are trying to kill me! Well, well.
If only your perfect daughter had told you this was gonna Yeah, yeah, yeah, you were right.
Blah, blah, blah.
You gonna help me or what? [sighs.]
I guess that's as sincere as you get.
You need to tell the truth.
I already told them the lousy truth, but they didn't believe me.
[overlapping chatter.]
Okay.
Fine.
Follow my lead.
Everyone, you have it all wrong.
Bonking Gran won't make her stop the storm.
Yeah.
Listen to her.
We gotta throw her off a cliff.
Uh, who off the what now? - Why Amber not think of that? - Of course.
Cliffs are always the answer.
[screaming.]
[screaming.]
[shrieking.]
[cackling.]
Gran? But I chucked you off the side.
Are you unchuckable? [chuckling.]
Yep.
I can't be killed.
Eh but my one-time-only- comeback-from-the-dead power made me lose my gift of controlling the weather.
So now I'm back to normal.
Hey, my joints are feeling better.
Hey, look, the sun's back.
I guess almost killing Gran did work.
[overlapping muttering.]
Well, Gran, I hope you learned something from all this.
I sure did.
That my little girl can lie through her teeth just as good as her mom.
- [laughing.]
- [sighs.]
That's not what I meant.
[whistling, cheers.]
Whoo-oh-oh-oh Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum Whoo-oh, ba-dum-dum ba-dum Whoo-oh, ba-dum-dum Ba-dum-dum, ba-dum Whoo-oh-oh-oh Ba-dum-dum Ba-dum-dum ba-dum