Firefly Lane (2021) s02e12 Episode Script

1
[enchanting music plays]
When is it too late to find love?
In science news, a joint study
from two Ivy League universities
has concluded that
single women over the age of 35
are more likely to die
in a terrorist attack than get married.
For many young career women,
finding a husband and having children
may seem like
something they can put off until later,
but delaying your wedding
could mean being a bridesmaid forever.
- Great broadcast today. Very interesting.
- Thanks, Carol.
I really enjoyed
"Carol Tries Skateboarding."
Yeah. Quite the ride.
- How's your head?
- Fine. The helmet took most of the impact.
- That's good.
- Yeah.
So, um, I was wondering
[exhales]
what kind of, uh,
fact-checking did you do
on that piece about women over 35?
What are you implying?
Nothing. I'm just curious
about how you go about your research.
Every major news outlet
is reporting that study.
It's from Harvard.
So the answer is you didn't research.
[Tully scoffs]
Okay. [inhales deeply]
I know it's a bummer story for all of us.
I blame our sexist society.
But either way,
it isn't my job to make people feel good.
No
but if you're gonna make thousands
of women in this city feel terrible,
I'd hope you'd at least make sure
that what you're reporting is true.
[whimsical music playing]
[scoffs]
Fucking Carol.
Over here,
trying to tell me how to do my job.
I don't tell her how to put on
stupid outfits and make a fool of herself.
Don't tell me how to be a real journalist.
Wow, she must've really
got under your skin.
No, I don't care.
It's not my fault asshole men don't wanna
marry women over a certain age.
- Don't shoot the messenger, Carol.
- [Kate] Oh God, the terrorist story?
She accused me of not fact-checking.
Well, did you?
Fact-check what?
Is Harvard lying to us?
Plus, everyone is reporting on this.
It's on the cover of Newsweek.
I don't blame Carol for being upset.
I mean, I hated that story.
- It scared the shit out of me.
- Why are you scared? You're marrying Theo.
Nine years under the wire.
That's if you can set a date.
Well, I'm trying to, okay? It's hard.
He wants to get married in the summer,
and, you know, humidity, frizz.
And then the fall is so cold,
and spring, I mean, the rain so
You know,
if you're not ready to get married
I'm ready. I I've been ready.
I mean, the whole reason I broke up
with Johnny is because I'm ready.
Okay, Malarkey, if you say so.
I do.
Which is exactly what I will be saying on
May 10th.
It's perfect. Rainy season is over.
It's warm but not too humid. It's decided.
Theo and I will be married in Spring.
But that's only a few months away.
I thought we'd be roommates
for a little while longer.
I am not delaying any longer.
I will not be murdered by terrorists.
- I don't think you understood the story.
- Time waits for no woman.
Theo, hey, it's me.
Call Pip and Kitty
and tell them to book a travel agent
because you and I
are getting married in May.
[tender music playing]
I love you too. [chuckles]
Okay.
Yes. We're doing it. [chuckles]
- [chuckling]
- [indistinct chatter]
Will this shift ever be over?
[indistinct chatter continues]
[Tully] Ugh. They're such troglodytes.
Not like Sam.
He's so mature, and cultured, and worldly,
and je ne sais quoi.
Who's Sam?
Sam Waverly.
You mean Mr. Waverly, our teacher?
He told you to call him Sam?
No. But he will. Duh.
We have a connection.
- But he's super old.
- So?
Time is just an illusion.
It's meaningless.
Okay, Cloud. [scoffs]
Still, I think you can get expelled
for screwing a teacher.
Only if we get caught.
[chuckles softly]
Are you two just gonna watch them
destroy the restaurant?
[indistinct chatter continues]
[Tully sighs]
- [Neil] All right, hey, listen up.
- Of course not.
[clears throat]
[in high-pitched voice]
Oh, Coop-eo. Coop-eo.
Wherefore did you poop-eo?
Shut up, dickhead, all right? You know
I'm in the play for extra credit, right?
[Neil] Coop just likes
to prance around in tights.
[Coop] Shut up.
Hey, I'd prance around in tights
if I got to kiss Tully Hart.
[boys chuckle]
You can kiss my ass.
I will if you go to prom with me.
[chuckles]
In your dreams.
Barbara Lee Ellis High School
football rules!
- Whoo!
- [boys cheer]
- Touchdown!
- [Kate gasps]
[boys cheer]
- Yo. What did coach say, man?
- [Kate exhales]
All right? People look up to us.
Set an example.
[gentle music playing]
- What do I do with this?
- Uh
- I can take it.
- Okay.
[Johnny] Come on, just get dressed.
We're running late.
This wig looks like
a squirrel died on my head.
And I have nothing to wear.
Mmm, slap on that pink wig Tully got you,
and you're good to go.
It's Carol's retirement.
Nobody's gonna be judging you.
The last time these people saw me,
I was young and firm
and had both my original boobs.
Yeah, you're a boob down,
but you kicked cancer in the ass.
You powered through radiation.
You are a warrior.
A tired, bedraggled, worn-out warrior
with nothing to wear.
- Come here.
- Ugh. Don't make me go.
[Danny groans]
You better be ready, Tallulah.
- Wow.
- [chuckles] Where's Celeste?
- Oh, she [exhales] had a thing.
- [Tully] Bummer.
She didn't wanna stand around and listen
to us talk about the good old days?
I tried to entice her
with watered-down drinks,
seven-layer dip, to no avail.
- [sucks teeth] Shocking.
- Yeah.
- Saw the doc, by the way.
- Oh.
Yeah.
Antarctica burning. Clever.
[chuckles] Thank you.
Very powerful.
How'd the numbers come in?
- Gangbusters.
- Really?
Well, gangbusters for PBS.
Oh, so roughly what?
Hundred people, four hundred cats.
- You think you're so funny.
- [Danny chuckles]
Oh boy.
[laughing] Oh my God.
Holy shit!
This is like stepping into a time portal.
KPOC, God, it's barely changed.
[Johnny] Oh man. It even smells the same.
- [Kate] Mmm.
- [Johnny] Mm-hmm.
Johnny, Kate. Is that you? [laughs]
- Carol, congratulations!
- [Carol chuckles]
- Oh! Ah, we're hugging.
- [Carol chuckles]
Oh, you haven't changed a bit, Johnny,
you handsome rogue.
- Aw.
- [Carol chuckles]
Oh, Kate. Oh my, you look
Uh, like I have cancer.
Yes.
- Oh dear, I'm I'm so sorry. I
- Oh, no, it's fine.
I actually just finished radiation,
and I feel really good.
And my prognosis is excellent.
- [Carol] Oh.
- Yeah.
Well [chuckles]
you brave girl.
Yes. I'm very brave.
Anyway, retirement.
Congratulations.
What are you going to be doing
with all your free time, Carol?
Well, anything I want, really. [chuckles]
The pension here is fit for a hobo.
But I bought Microsoft
back when "Carol tried investing."
So I'm basically set for ever!
- [Carol laughs] Oh!
- [Johnny chuckles]
Oh, you know, I really must mingle.
Come on in and have a drink, okay?
- [Johnny] Yes, yes.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
[Danny] There they are.
- [Johnny] Hey! Good to see you, bud.
- Hey, Johnny.
Johnny, how are you?
Hey, Kate. Mwah!
That dress. You look beautiful.
Thank you.
And I know she told you to say that.
- No, I didn't.
- Sorry, she scares the hell out of me.
- You're a smart man.
- Hey.
- I've died and gone to heaven
- [Danny] Oh!
because I'm looking at
the most heavenly creature.
- Mutt, it is so good to see you.
- [Mutt] Great to see you.
[Kate exhales]
Johnny, buddy,
try and return my calls once in a while.
- Oh, sorry, man. I've just been busy.
- [Mutt chuckles]
Tully, Dan the Sports Man.
You guys come together?
- Indeed.
- Yep.
Nice. I always said
you two were meant to be.
- Oh no, we're not a couple.
- Yeah. No.
Got it.
Keep it out of the tabloids. Smart.
- Well
- [Johnny] Yeah.
- Should we get that drink? Let's go.
- [Kate] Yes.
- So what have you been up to?
- Oh God, so much. Where to start?
Uh, still a cameraman.
Still working here, 25 years. [chuckles]
And, uh
Ah, I guess that's that's pretty much it.
- Well, you look great though.
- Good for you.
Thanks. Yeah, um, no complaints.
I'm the luckiest guy I know.
[young Kate] And now
to see into my future.
Will Coop and I get married?
"Outlook not so good."
[Kate scoffs]
"Ask again later."
You're wasting your time with Coop.
How're you gonna get married
if he won't acknowledge you in public?
He acknowledges me.
Yeah, as his personal janitor
at Burger Planet USA.
Not as his girlfriend.
- That's because I'm not his girlfriend.
- Because you're too good for him.
You don't know
what he's like when we're alone.
Well, in public, he's a jackass.
He's just not ready to tell people
about us yet. And I'm okay with that.
We both really like each other,
and it's romantic and amazing.
And we've already gone to second base.
Next time,
I might even let him go to third.
Unlike you and your precious Sam,
who aren't even in the game.
[upbeat music playing faintly]
Should I go for it with Mr. Waverly?
"Most likely." See? The 8-ball agrees.
Gross. Tully, you can't be serious.
[Tully] Why?
Because it's wrong.
How is it wrong?
I like him.
He inspires me.
And And he's cute,
and sexy,
and I can tell that he likes me too.
I don't care if he's my teacher.
Everybody knows Suzy Owens slept
with Mr. Melrose last year,
and nothing bad happened.
Yeah, except for when she thought she was
pregnant for the entire month of March.
Please. Everybody knows
she was only doing that for the attention.
Tully, seriously, what are you gonna do?
Like, bring Mr. Waverly to prom?
What, like you're bringing Coop to prom?
[rock music playing faintly]
That was really mean.
Yeah. Well, you're being mean too.
- I'm trying to look out for you.
- [Tully] So am I!
Let's just
let's just not talk about it anymore.
[Tully sucks teeth]
Works for me. [sighs]
[Mr. Waverly] Excellent work today, Tully.
You were so connected and in the moment.
It really moved me. Well done.
Thanks, Mr. Waverly.
[Mr. Waverly sighs]
Coop, try not to hold back so much.
You're playing Romeo like he's cool,
but he is not.
He is hopelessly romantic,
and he's out of control.
Can't help it if I'm naturally cool.
- [scattered chuckles]
- Well, try.
And keep working on that balcony speech.
Can't I just write it on my hand?
Nope. Because you'll get on stage
[clears throat] you'll be nervous,
you'll sweat, it'll smear.
And then before you know it
[inhales deeply]
it is the beast and Juliet is the suds?
[faint chuckles]
- No one wants that.
- [Coop] I don't sweat, coach.
All right? Not when I play football,
not when I'm in some dumb play.
[chuckles] You're human, Coop.
Don't waste time pretending not to sweat.
Embrace being uncool.
Write bad poetry.
Sing out loud, off-key,
at the top of your lungs,
especially if it's a song
that you're embarrassed to admit you like.
Be in the school play
and just give it everything you have.
Don't be afraid to look like a fool.
To sweat is human.
To be young
divine.
[sighs]
And it's all a gift you have to give back
before you even know it.
[inhales deeply]
So make the most of it all.
Right now.
All right, people,
I've, uh, rambled on long enough.
You are dismissed.
Sorry, I can't hang out
with you today, Tully.
I've got a shift at Burger Planet USA.
Uh, but luckily on Wednesdays
it's super dead,
so I'll just be in the back room
by myself.
Doing nothing.
Okay, cool.
- Okay, bye.
- [Tully] Bye.
[faint indistinct chatter]
[Tully] Hey.
Hey.
I really liked
what you said about the sweating
[chuckles]
and not caring what other people think,
and, you know, art and time
and and how to make the most of it.
Thanks.
Yeah.
Um, do you mind staying late
and running lines with me?
I'm having trouble with the first act,
and I just really want to experience it
and do it justice, you know?
Honing your craft, I love it.
I'm in.
Great. Thanks, Sam.
[adult Kate] God, we were so young
and stupid back then.
This is like being on an acid trip.
- [Johnny chuckles]
- It is so weird being back here.
Speaking of drugs, over there
is where we made out on ecstasy.
Mmm, that was a good day.
And over there is where we had sex
on top of the editing machine.
Shit, I did not realize
how see-through those glass blocks are.
Do you think anyone saw us?
Nah, they were all on cocaine
and adrenaline. It was the '80s.
[Kate chuckles]
Remember when we stayed late that night
and had sex on my desk
and the janitor caught us?
We were kind of out of control
with the office sex, weren't we?
Yeah. A little bit.
[Kate gasps]
Ooh! And remember,
right there is where you impertinently
and very boldly kissed me
whilst I was engaged to another man.
What are you talking about?
You don't remember kissing me
when I was engaged to Theo?
I remember you shockingly and brazenly
kissed me when you were engaged to Theo.
What?
Okay, that is insane.
First of all, I would never do that.
Second, I remember like it was yesterday.
Yeah. So do I.
It was after the live broadcast.
Tully had just said the f-word on air.
Yes. Yeah, I remember.
Theo and I had just set a date
for the wedding.
Yes. That broke my heart.
And you were very upset
because you had just lost your watch.
- Yes, I recall.
- I was just trying to comfort you.
With your lips.
- No, no, you kissed me, buddy.
- Yeah. I kissed you back.
I never would've kissed you first.
You were engaged and there is a code.
Okay, this is ridiculous.
You kissed me first.
- You
- [Kate] Mutt. Quick word.
- [Kate clears throat]
- [Johnny sighs]
Okay. Who between the two of us
do you think would be more likely
to throw her engagement down the toilet
for a stolen kiss
in a smelly local newsroom?
You mean that night
you guys were making out over there
after Tully dropped the f-bomb live?
- Yes.
- Wait, how do you know that?
[Mutt] I remember that night.
- You'd just set a date with Nigel.
- Theo.
And I was bummed
because I was still carrying a torch.
- [Kate chuckles]
- And I was really bummed
because I saw you cheating on your man
with him instead of me.
- [Kate] Hmm.
- Oh.
Anyway, place was mostly empty,
and I was doing a camera test
after the broadcast,
and I kind of accidentally
caught the whole thing on tape.
- Shit.
- Wow.
I wasn't lingering or anything.
No, no, no, no. This is great.
So So tell us who kissed who.
Oh, I have no idea, but the tape
is probably still in the archive.
- [Johnny] Huh.
- Thank you.
I'm gonna find that tape,
and I'm gonna prove
that you, sir, are the scoundrel.
[chuckles] You guys never change.
I love it.
I am a scoundrel,
but you kissed me, you minx.
[Mutt continues chuckling] Oh.
[sighs] Who'd a thunk that
the pain in my ass who sat at this desk
would go on to become the Tully Hart?
Me.
- I'd a thunk it.
- [Danny chuckles]
I knew exactly where
I was headed all along.
Admit it. You knew it too.
You knew you were gonna be famous someday.
I had a lot of dreams.
Some came true.
[inhales]
Some did not.
- Aw. Poor little rich boy
- [Danny chuckles]
in his high-rise penthouse
with his dream job
and gorgeous girlfriend.
[music playing faintly]
Mmm.
[Tully] What's with the face?
Nothing.
Celeste and I kind of had a big fight.
That's why she didn't come today.
- I thought she had a thing.
- Her thing was she's fucking pissed at me.
Why?
Because she's 34 and all her friends
are getting married and having babies.
And she says
that any woman over 35 who isn't married
is statistically more likely
to be killed by terrorists.
No, no, no. That story is 20 years old
and categorically untrue. Trust me.
[Danny] It doesn't matter.
Celeste wants to get married. Soon.
That's intense.
She's ready, but I don't know
if we're ready, you know?
I don't know if I'll ever be ready.
Mmm. Probably not. It's like me and Max.
Who's Max?
My ex-husband.
What?
You were married?
I did have a life between 1985
and your triumphant return to Seattle.
No, I know, I just never thought of you
as the marrying kind.
Neither did I. [sighs]
But I went for it anyway.
I let go of my fear,
and I proposed to him.
Classic Tallulah Rose,
you gotta be in charge.
Would you just listen?
I silenced the voices in my head
that were telling me I wasn't ready,
and I dove in with both feet.
Right. You did say
that he's your ex-husband.
Well, technically, not even that
because we had it annulled.
I'm sorry.
Am I supposed to follow this advice?
[chuckles] Okay, forget Max.
The point of the story
is you don't have forever
to figure this shit out.
There is no perfect time for anything,
but you still have to
make decisions anyway.
It's like Kate.
Her cancer was a wake-up call.
Tomorrow isn't promised.
You can lose everything in an instant.
[inhales deeply]
So if you really care about Celeste,
stop wasting time. Just go for it.
[Danny exhales]
[Kate] Ma'am
Ma'am, I I don't think it means
you're never going to get married.
[scoffs]
I will pass that along
to the station manager.
Me? I'm 26.
Uh, actually, I'm engaged.
[scoffs]
She said she hopes
I get killed by a terrorist.
Yeah. Well, everyone wants
to shoot the messenger.
What's going on?
Who's in the magazine?
Is it Jane Pauley,
AKA the woman who doesn't know
the two of you are in a bitter rivalry?
It's no one.
- Oh.
- [Tully sighs]
- Oh what?
- I'm sorry.
What are you sorry for?
- I know you miss him.
- [scoffs]
No, I don't.
- Well, I'm sure it sucks to get reminded.
- It doesn't suck.
[exhales] I get it.
I mean, you and Danny break up.
He moves to New York, gets famous,
and then you have to read
about him in a magazine
on the same day
that you report that depressing story.
The marriage thing?
No way, I am not Carol.
I'm young and successful.
And I don't want to get married.
And I don't think
about Dan the Sports Man, ever.
[Tully inhales]
I have some errands to run.
See you at home. [kisses]
[kisses]
["Steam Computing"
by Loïc Desplanques playing]
Hi.
Hi.
Want to buy me a drink?
You have a drink.
[gulps]
How about now?
[glass thuds]
[both chuckle]
- Here for that pharmaceutical conference?
- [woman] Yes.
So your company pays for this whole thing?
[woman] Yup.
[Johnny clears throat]
So you, um
you said you're from Pittsburgh.
I hear it's beaut
- [Johnny exhales]
- [both breathing heavily]
[Johnny chuckles]
[Johnny breathing heavily]
[belt jingles]
[Johnny moans]
Sorry.
Sorry.
- For what?
- [Johnny continues breathing heavily]
I, um
I can't do this. [chuckles nervously]
I'm still in love with my ex.
That's totally cool.
- We don't have to fall in love.
- [Johnny chuckles]
I, uh I thought coming up here
might make me feel better, but it didn't.
It just [inhales]
made me feel like
I'm cheating on her. [exhales]
Which is stupid.
I know that, but, um
Thank you, though.
It's really beautiful, Jimmy.
Johnny.
See, it's also annoying.
Because I just want to get laid.
Yeah. Understood.
Now I have to go to the bar
and start all over again.
Pfft. Yeah, that's a bummer.
Look, I I really am sorry.
Um, I feel terrible.
[woman] Whatever.
Fucking Brits.
[dramatic music playing]
[door unlocks, opens]
Oh, it's almost midnight.
Have you been shopping this whole time?
No, I was working.
First, I went shopping.
I got you a present, by the way.
[Kate squeals]
Uh, here it is.
Aw, an engagement present.
Sort of. It's for you and Theo,
but, really, it's for us
for when you're married
and I come over for movie nights.
I love it. [chuckles]
- I also got this blouse, these earrings.
- [gasps]
- Oh, fancy.
- And four pairs of shoes.
This is a lot.
Haven't you ever heard of retail therapy?
So you are depressed.
No, I was mad at Carol
about that dumb story.
And I maybe, kind of, sort of,
miss Danny a little.
So, you know what I did?
Spent an obscene amount of money on shoes?
These are fabulous, by the way.
Yes. But then I went back to the office
and started researching.
And [inhales]
Carol may be right.
That study might be bullshit.
Carol was right, and Harvard was wrong?
I think the press, including us,
just sort of jumped on it
because it was such a juicy headline.
- Wow, nice work, Tully Hart.
- Thanks.
Now I just have to convince Stan
to let me issue a retraction.
This is seriously impressive.
You took a tough criticism,
and you turned it into hard work.
You're like the best reporter I know.
You're better than Jane Pauley.
[Tully] Mmm. [sucks teeth]
Nice try.
You can't have the shoes.
Oh.
There you go, sir.
A dollar twenty
for a burger, fries, and coke?
Uh, inflation's out of control. [chuckles]
Hey, okay. Can you watch this for a sec?
I gotta go do something, uh, in the back.
Okay.
[romantic music playing]
Kate Mularkey, you drive me crazy.
And you're the foxiest, sexiest girl.
Uh
I believe you.
[chuckles] What do you mean?
I believe you really think that.
Duh, of course I do.
So then, how come
when you were in here the other day,
you acted like I didn't exist?
I acted like you existed.
You handed me a soggy napkin.
I helped you clean up.
I know you like me, Coop.
Just
Why don't you want other people to know
that you like me?
[Coop sighs]
It's more like
There's all this pressure on me
every second, every day.
I'm captain of the football team.
I'm goddamn Romeo in the school play.
Everyone's on my ass all the time.
"Coop, pass the ball.
Coop, learn your lines."
"Your grades are slipping because you're
passing the ball and learning your lines."
My dad, my friends, my coach,
in my face, judging me.
But then
I get to be with you.
[exhales] And when it's just us,
and no one else's stupid opinion matters
I can be me.
[gentle music playing]
And I'm so happy.
For once.
- Oh.
- [Coop chuckles softly]
I wish you could understand
how bad I want to scream your name
from the roof of Burger Planet USA.
I'm not hiding you, Kate.
I'm protecting us.
From them
and all their bullshit.
You
deserve to be protected.
[gentle music continues]
[Coop clears throat]
I I just need some lard.
- I was just looking for the bathroom.
- Oh, uh, yeah. It's down the hall.
- Down the hall. Right. Sorry to barge in.
- No, it's all good.
It's not what it looks like.
You're not having a secret affair
with the hottest guy in school?
[Kate sighs]
I'm sure you wanna get your revenge on me,
or whatever, by blabbing to everyone
and ruining the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
So, whatever.
Go ahead.
I don't care.
What?
I wouldn't
Kate, come on.
I can keep a secret.
[Kate exhales]
[Kate] And then he kissed me
and it was like [exhales]
It was like falling backwards
into a warm pool of of liquid happiness.
- Wow. French?
- Oui.
- [chuckles] He touch your boobs?
- Oh yeah. So good.
[exhales] Have you touched his
Uh, no. Not yet.
Uh, but I, like, felt it on my thigh,
and it was like, whoa.
[gasps] That is so romantic. [inhales]
When we're together,
it's like I'm transported to this place
that's beyond time.
It's
It's timeless.
Is he taking you to prom?
It's not for another month and a half.
I mean, it's still a long ways away.
I mean, we'll probably go together,
like in a group or something.
Or, I don't know. I honestly haven't even
really thought about it that much yet.
It's I just still can't believe
he's giving me the time of day. [chuckles]
Why? You're one of the coolest people
in the entire school.
Thanks.
Uh
We haven't hung out in a while.
Still like to play Risk?
Is Madagascar impossible to defend
from the north?
[both chuckle]
Well, maybe we could play next week.
[sighs]
If you can get a boy like Coop,
maybe I can get a date to the dance too.
I don't see why not.
You've got all the time in the world.
[Lisa-Karen chuckles]
[Carol] It all just goes so fast.
[sighs]
Thirty years in one place
over in a blink of an eye.
Hmm. It's crazy how that happens.
I feel like last week I was 21.
Yesterday, I was 30.
This morning I woke up and I'm
The same age I was when you started here.
Shit. Is that true?
Bet you thought I was really old then.
Nah.
- Kind of.
- [Carol chuckles]
- Guess that makes me old now.
- Hmm.
Not as old as me.
You still got it though.
How come you're hanging it up?
It was time. [chuckles]
I'd already tried everything else.
[chuckles]
So what's next?
Traveling, seeing the world.
Maybe I'll even make it to Antarctica
and check out those emperor penguins
from your documentary.
You actually watched that.
I ran out of Ambien.
Wow, it's nice to know that our impending
climate catastrophe makes you sleepy.
The destruction of our planet
keeps me up at night.
But watching you hide your talents,
that's a bore.
How is that hiding my talents?
It was one of the most meaningful things
I've ever done.
And all five of the people
who saw it thank you.
But, Tully, you belong
in front of a much bigger audience.
Like your old show.
So instead of reporting
on the biggest story of our time,
I should stick to dating tips.
The Girlfriend Hour told women
that what they care about matters,
their interior lives matter,
they matter.
But you always thought
you were above that.
What the fuck does that mean?
I did that show for years.
And some part of you
always felt like you were above it.
Same way you felt about me
when you worked here.
- I never felt like I was
- [Carol] Bullshit.
You thought I was a joke.
But I don't care.
I wedged open the door
that you kicked down.
I'm proud of that,
and I'm proud of you
and everything you've done,
not just the serious journalism.
You know, someday, hopefully,
you'll feel that way too.
[indistinct chatter, laughter]
[somber music playing]
This is how you spend a party?
You're a strange bird, Mularkey.
Johnny gave up looking,
but I am not going to.
Looking for what?
Remember when you said "fuck" on air?
That was February, right? '86?
March.
Gee, don't remind me.
I almost got fired. Jeez!
Between you and Carol,
everyone's just piling it on.
- [Tully sighs]
- What are you talking about?
Carol thinks I'm wasting my talent.
Like I care about hosting
another stupid talk show.
Whatever, Carol. You don't know me.
Oh my God, you totally think she's right.
Please.
I mean
sure, I miss it.
And yeah, I'd like to find a way
to cover more important stories
while still maintaining
a large national platform.
Plus, I actually do like
the fluff sometimes.
I mean, who doesn't love
a good makeover once in a while?
It's fun and uplifting and Shit.
Carol is right.
[exhales] Now I'll have to start hosting
my own talk show again.
Tul, that is so great.
I am super happy for you.
Now, could you help me find this tape
so we can prove Johnny kissed me first,
and I can rub it in his face.
I already looked for it, obviously.
Yeah, it is your responsibility.
It's a silver watch.
Silver and gold
with Roman numerals on the face.
Can you Can you, like,
check under the bed or
Yes, I believe that the maid
would've turned it in. I'm just asking.
[sighs] Okay, great.
Well, you've got my number.
Thank you.
Fuck!
[Johnny sighs]
- Is everything okay?
- Yeah, I just I just lost my watch.
Oh, you can always get a new one.
Ooh! You could get a Swatch.
Yeah, maybe.
Fuck.
Okay, thank you.
I just got the proof.
That study? Totally flawed.
And the way we've been reporting it?
Completely misleading.
So, Carol was right.
Sure, yeah.
If you want to put
that fine a point on it, Carol was right.
Ooh, so do you think
Stan's gonna let you issue a retraction?
You ever hear the saying, "It's better
to ask forgiveness than permission"?
The Coast Guard has recovered the ferry
and, thankfully,
no injuries were reported.
An investigation into the cause
is underway.
And now, I'd like to issue a retraction
and a formal apology
to all my female viewers,
including the women I work with.
On Friday, I reported a story to you
without providing context or asking
the important follow-up questions.
Afterwards, a colleague called me on it.
Which inspired me to keep digging.
Through that digging, I discovered
that the widely reported story
about single women over the age of 35
being more likely to die
in a terrorist attack than get married
is slanted and misleading.
Not to mention sexist, misogynistic,
and irresponsible.
You know me,
and you trust me to bring you the truth.
This time I didn't.
The phrase "more likely to die
in a terrorist attack,"
is not even in the original study.
The press just latched onto it.
And here we are.
I'd like to remind all the women
watching from home of any age,
don't let a grabby headline
and an ignorant anchorwoman
try to tell you what your future holds.
The modern woman's future is in her hands.
One dumb study taken out of context
can't tell you who you are or stop you
from doing whatever the fuck you want.
[all gasp]
This has been Tully Hart for KPOC News.
- I gotta say, I was a badass.
- [all] Mmm.
I should re-play that
on the first episode of my new talk show.
Speaking of which, Johnny, how do you feel
about getting back into producing?
Okay, can we pause
the contract negotiations
and get to the part where we see
I was right and Johnny owes me 20 bucks?
- It's coming. It's coming.
- [chuckles] You wish.
[Mutt] Techta Flex 2000 camera test,
March 9th, 1986.
See, we'd just gotten this new camera,
so I stayed late to do a test.
I thought I was alone in the office.
Then
- [Kate chuckles] Oh my God. Look at us!
- [Johnny] Oh my God.
- Look at my sweater. It is fabulous!
- Look at my hair. It's terrible.
- [Kate chuckles] Yeah, it is.
- [Johnny] Yeah.
Oh, and here comes the part
where you kiss me.
Yeah, better take this
- to wipe the egg off your face.
- [scoffs]
[Johnny] What! Dude, what the hell?
- No, no, no, no.
- Don't worry. It's coming back.
I definitely saw you guys going at it.
[Mutt] Oh shit.
- Oh! Wait, you didn't get it?
- Are you serious? Come on!
- [Tully sighs]
- [Johnny groans]
- I'm sorry, babe.
- Oh no!
Guess we're just
never gonna know for sure. Mmm.
Oh, we know for sure.
I know for sure you kissed me.
[Johnny grumbles]
And [exhales] I was so confused,
and excited, and scared.
God, it was awful being that young.
Feeling like you're on the precipice
of your entire existence,
and one wrong move, take the wrong job,
or marry the wrong person,
and you just end up in the wrong life.
Well, good thing
we ended up in the right one.
[kisses]
God, I would not want to be 26 again.
- [Mutt] Pfft. Me neither.
- [Johnny] Oh no.
- Except for maybe the skin.
- [all] Mmm.
And my hair. And my boobs.
- [Tully chuckles]
- My joints.
Right? My knees,
they've got these pangs in them.
- Yeah, I get the lower back stuff.
- Yeah.
I tweaked my back the other week
trying to open a jar of pickles.
- Oh, it's the worst.
- [Tully groans]
[gentle music playing]
- Who wants a drink?
- Yeah.
- Yes.
- [Tully] Okay.
[Mutt] I'll take one.
- [gentle music continues]
- [sirens wailing in the distance]
How'd it go with Stan?
He's pissed.
There is a big meeting tomorrow.
Tully and I have to drive to Tacoma
so that he can yell at us in person.
He's not going to fire you, though, right?
Are you okay?
[smacks lips]
No.
[Kate] Don't worry about Stan.
I think, if anything,
this will be good for the ratings.
[Johnny sighs, sucks teeth]
I lost my watch.
[sucks teeth]
The one that you got me for my birthday.
And, um, I feel awful.
I really fucked up.
- Come on, Johnny.
- [Johnny exhales]
Hey, don't worry about it.
[Johnny exhales]
Some guy was just selling them
out of a suitcase. It wasn't real.
I mean, there is no such brand as Growlex.
Oh, that's not
It was just, you know,
that was that was the last piece of you
that I had of our relationship.
And And now it's gone forever
because I lost it.
[inhales deeply]
And you're going to get married
on May 10th, and I was
[tender music playing]
Oh shit.
[both breathing heavily]
Oh my God. I am so sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
- I'm so sorry.
- Uh
- I shouldn't have done that.
It's fine.
I, uh I think maybe that I just felt like
we needed like a goodbye kiss. You know?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's Exactly.
And, uh [sighs]
Bye.
Yep. Bye.
[Mr. Waverly] O, then, dear saint,
let lips do what hands do.
They pray, grant thou,
lest faith turn to despair.
Saints do not move,
though grant for prayers' sake.
Then move not
while my prayer's effect I take.
My sin is purged.
Okay. Well, uh, I think you get it.
And, uh, I will see you tomorrow.
Oh, Sam, um, I was actually wondering
I already know
what you're going to ask, and
the answer is no.
Not now, not ever.
- Trust me, you don't really want that.
- Yes, I do.
It is normal for students
to look up to their teachers,
and sometimes those feelings
can get confused with something else.
Look, I know you think people
won't approve, but nobody has to know.
Life is short.
True connections are rare,
and we have a true connection.
No. I am not your Romeo, Tully.
I'm an adult, you're a kid.
- No, I'm a woman, Sam.
- [inhales]
I know it must feel that way,
but that's not how I see you.
Right. Um
Yeah, this was stupid. Sorry.
- I'm sorry.
- No, I just, um I have I have to go.
[tender music playing]
[crickets chirping]
[Kate sighs]
Hey.
You okay, Tul?
I read lines with Mr. Waverly.
- [Tully sniffles]
- How'd it go?
He doesn't want me. [breathes shakily]
He thinks I'm a child.
He basically laughed in my face.
- [Tully sniffles]
- [Kate sighs]
It's just not the right time.
[Tully sobs]
[Kate exhales]
- [gentle music playing]
- [Tully exhales, sniffles]
[sniffles]
Will anyone ever want me?
[sniffles]
- I can't believe Carol is really retiring.
- Mmm.
Does that make us old?
[inhales] No.
Just makes us
- not young.
- [Tully chuckles]
[Danny] Mmm. [sucks teeth]
They say you can never go home again,
but that felt pretty close.
Home?
Sports Man, you worked at KPOC
for, like, five minutes.
Hell of a five minutes, though.
[tender music playing]
I should call Justine.
Let her know I'm ready
to dive back into network television.
Your fans need you.
They do.
[car horn honks]
I [groans]
Thank you.
Good night, Tallulah.
Goodnight, Sports Man.
[Johnny groans]
[inhales]
- [Kate] Good morning.
- [Johnny] Mmm!
Well, you're in a good mood.
[Kate] That was fun last night.
That blast from the past
made me appreciate being right here,
right now,
exactly where I'm meant to be.
Me too.
It was fun seeing everyone. [sips]
Yeah, and, you know, tape or no tape,
I mean, we both know you kissed me.
How exactly do we both know that?
Well, think about it. I was engaged.
- You know what a goody two-shoes I am.
- Oh, I know you like people to think that.
[chuckles]
I mean, yeah.
I was still in love with you.
But I wouldn't have done that to Theo.
I wouldn't have crossed that line.
I know it. I'm sure of it.
You're right.
[inhales]
I couldn't keep my hands off you then.
I can't keep my hands off you now.
And just so we're clear,
that was me kissing you first.
[phone ringing]
Hello.
Hey, Tul.
- You coming over for brunch?
- Yeah. If I can get my ass in gear.
I didn't sleep last night.
Why, what's wrong?
I think
I think I am in love
with Dan the Sports Man.
[chuckles] You think?
I do not know why
you still haven't told him how you feel.
He's got a girlfriend.
So? They're not married.
Yeah, but it's still kind of wrong,
isn't it?
Maybe.
But if Johnny hadn't kissed me,
I might be married to Theo,
and that would've been wrong.
I just don't know if the timing is right.
Take it from me,
there's no time like the present.
There's no time but the present.
Yeah, that's the speech
I gave Danny last night,
trying to convince him
to propose to Celeste.
[Kate] Wait, you had to convince him?
Tul, what are you waiting for?
[exhales]
Danny [inhales]
I know this is kind of insane
for me to be saying right now, but
Danny
I know it's kind of insane
for me to be saying this right now, but
[sighs]
["Only You" by Yazoo playing]
Let's face it,
it has always been you and me.
It's always been you and me.
It's always been you and me.
Came back only yesterday ♪
I'm moving farther away ♪
Want you near me ♪
[Danny] That's not how it works.
That's too much pressure.
- Hey, guys.
- [Danny] Hey, Tul.
[Celeste] Oh my God, Tully. Guess what?
Danny proposed.
We just went out and bought the ring.
Isn't it gorgeous?
Wow.
Yeah, that's incredible. [exhales]
[Celeste] Danny told me your pep talk lit
a fire under his ass.
Thank you so much.
Yeah, you told me not to waste my time.
You were right.
[Celeste] Come inside
for some champagne to celebrate.
Ugh, I I can't. Bad timing.
I'm late for brunch with Kate,
but I'll check back in
with you guys later.
And congratulations to you both.
I'm so happy for you.
Thanks.
All I needed was the love you gave ♪
All I needed for another day ♪
And all I ever knew ♪
Only you ♪
[song fades]
[gentle music playing]
[music fades]