Freakshow (2013) s02e13 Episode Script

1 Right now on "Freakshow".
- The one-armed handstand.
- Ah-ha.
It's close to impossible.
Oh, almost, almost! Whoa-whoa! We should expand in a different way.
- Maybe a road show.
- Holy s! Do you realize what we just went through to expand here? Once we start it, we might get in trouble.
I've been arrested performing here before.
Excuse me, sir I need to see a permit.
Okay.
- Can I get your name? - Okay, no problem.
You got it, you got it, you got it.
Folks, today, you will witness the strangest creatures on earth, the living wonders of the world, and the most amazing people on the planet.
They're all inside.
What you thought was a myth, you will see with your own eyes.
Welcome to "The Freakshow.
" I'm always on the lookout for new talent, so I've invited Short E.
Dangerously to come out to "The Freakshow.
" He's an incredible half-man.
This man performs amazing feats like fire-breathing, and knife-throwing, and unbelievable acrobatic stunts.
- I am so excited you're here, Short E.
- Thank you.
I've been waiting for you to come.
It's been a long time.
- We've been talking for, like - Forever.
Finally, I actually have some time where I could come out and see you guys.
- Yeah.
- Yes, finally.
I was born with a condition that caused me to be born with most of my spine missing.
As a result of that condition, I had my legs amputated when I was two and a half.
The way my mother raised me was that I would have the same opportunities as everybody else, but I had to really stand out from the quote-unquote normal people.
Were there any problems growing up without legs? I mean, yeah yes and no.
You know, there was always the few jerks in that realm, - you know? - Right.
But, uh, overall, it was, you know, normal kid growing up.
You know, football, basketball, wrestling, skateboarding.
I've always done what I've wanted to do.
I do what I do because I have no other choice.
I would not wish for legs anyway, ever.
It's provided me with the life that I have now, and I would not change my life for anything.
I'm having way too much fun.
All right right now, I'm gonna do what we in the biz And you all know this It's an impalement act.
I have six-inch, steel throwing knives, and I'm gonna need your guys' help.
Asia, pick a card.
Four of spades.
[Cheers and applause.]
Creature, what number? Thinking about that number two.
[Cheers and applause.]
Morgue, pick a card.
Uh, six.
[Cheers and applause.]
Right on! - That's incredible, Short E.
- Thank you, thank you.
My old friend, George, his health has been declining and he's ended up in an old folks home, and what we hope is that we can brighten his day, and bring some joy to the rest of the folks at the home.
Hey, I'm here to see George French.
Sure he's in the dining room.
- I'll show you where it is.
- Okay thank you.
Hey, George how you feeling? Not bad for an old buzzard.
[Chuckling.]
I'm known to many, many people as "The Wizard of Venice" because for the last 30 or 40 years, I've been reading palms there.
Todd and I met on the Venice boardwalk, in front of "The Freakshow," right around ten years ago.
This is George.
He's the tallest man in America.
- Yes, how you doing, George? - Fine thank you.
So, read my palm, George.
A little difference in size there, George.
- [Collective laughter.]
- You read a lot of palms.
I don't think you've read one that big.
Uh it's very good.
You still gotta teach me how to palm read.
Teach, I can.
The question is, can you learn? Uh, I'm a good student.
- You're what? - I'm a good student.
- I learn well.
- Okay thank you.
Since we're here, you want me to give you a little taste of what goes on inside "The Freakshow?" Good idea! Ladies and gentlemen, kids of all ages, this is the world famous "Venice Beach Freakshow.
" It's known around the world as the strangest show on earth.
First up, you've heard of a bearded lady, you've read about a bearded lady, but folks, give it up.
Here's Jessa, the bearded lady! [Cheers and applause.]
I think bringing everybody to the old folks home has brought a little bit of happiness to 'em, you know.
It's broken the monotony, I know that.
She's gonna keep going all the way around.
This is why we call her "The Rubber Girl" Oh, look at that.
[Cheers and applause.]
Wait what did you say? [Laughing.]
Well, I went and saw George.
- Oh, how's he doing? - He's he's doing okay.
I tell you the one thing, though.
That really made me start thinking, is that life is short, and it's really been making me think about what I wanna do with "The Freakshow," uh, a little more.
You know, we've talked about trying to expand here even further, and I've been thinking about that we should expand in a different way.
You know, maybe a road show, maybe a traveling show? Uh, taking it to city to city, so people could get a chance to see it up close and personal, like they see it here.
Holy s! Do you realize what we just went through to expand in here? Like, do you remember how stressful it was.
We just took a freakin' gamble.
- Did it work? - Yeah, but When I decided to leave the music business, and walked away, and kept spending all that money, to get more and more strange things, - you were nervous then.
- I thought you were crazy.
I left the music business for one reason.
I just wasn't happy anymore.
And, you know, I climbed to the top of the ladder.
I won three grammys, had my own record label, but I've always lived from my soul, and when my soul calls me to go somewhere, I go.
For me, these people make me happy.
I don't need to fit into everybody's idea of what a normal life is.
Is that something you're ready to dedicate your life to, or not? I've already dedicated my life But bigger! Todd is a total dreamer and I always support him, but I just feel like, "how many times can you risk everything," "and it always work out?" What if we, like, lose everything? Hey what if we gain everything? Oh, Todd.
I don't know if now is the time we could, like, take something like this on.
I really do consider you the modern-day Johnny Eck.
Thank you.
Johnny Eck was an incredible side-show, half-man performer.
He was in the movie, "Freaks", and toured the whole world.
He was so impressive, he was known as "The King of the Freaks.
" Now, Johnny Eck, as you know, had a very special thing that he always did.
The one-armed handstand.
Ah-ha, yeah.
I'm familiar with the move.
I haven't quite fully gotten it, but I've always thought that, you know, if I can do the move he did, that would put me over the top, - if you will.
- Yeah, exactly.
It's a pretty close to impossible stunt, but if you're gonna consider yourself the modern-day "King of the Freaks," you need to be able to do what the King of the Freaks did.
Let's give it a shot.
Whoa-whoa! I'll tell you what You should keep practicing that.
Yeah, I need to practice that.
I know this is a goal that you wanna have happen.
It is a goal it is a goal.
Okay, you pull that off, that's a little piece of history right there.
That is some history I always like making history.
Well, you all give it up for him again.
- [Cheers and applause.]
- Short E.
Dangerously! Thank you.
So, what are you trying to get? Uh, well, I'm not really sure.
I'm just kinda looking around for ideas here, for stunts or acts.
We're at the hardware store, today.
It's kind of a place I like to go just to look around, get inspired for new acts.
There's always something interesting to find.
- Look at this.
- What the I don't know why this is necessary, but it would be perfect for sword swallowing.
Welding goggles.
Can you get those for me, please? Ha-ha-ha.
I like these.
- Yeah, they are cool.
- I'm not gonna weld, but Oh, hey, you know, I actually need one of these and they're on clearance.
- Lucky me.
- That seems kinda scary.
We'll see if it works.
[Saw buzzing.]
- I love that noise.
- Wow.
That's dangerous.
Yeah, if that hit flesh, that would be bad.
Even if it barely hit you, it would, like, slice the s out of you.
- Yeah, I'll take this with me.
- Yeah.
Did I tell you that my dad's been talking about, you know, like, expanding "The Freakshow?" No.
He wants to either take the show on the road, or maybe even come up with a new location.
- Really? - Yeah.
We would still work together, right? Well, that's, um, a big concern that I had because we know our show so well, it'd be weird if we didn't do it together.
If the expansion does happen, and the plan is to separate Asia and I, I'll have to see if, um, I could do that or not.
We gotta do the show.
Yes, we will make this happen.
All right.
- Two, three - Rock it.
- [Collective.]
Four, five, six, seven - Get it.
- Eight, nine - Oh, Short E.
! - Ten all right! - Wow, yeah! [Cheers and applause.]
- Good job, Short E.
- Good job, Short E.
You're strong, dude.
You know, 35 years of walking on your arms - will do that for ya, so - I guess so.
It's gonna take a lot to do this one-armed handstand.
Um, I broke this elbow about ten years ago, and, uh, it never healed right.
Now, is that the arm you're gonna put all the weight on? Yeah.
I've been practicing the one-armed handstand.
Uh, it requires a lot of strength and a lot of balance.
If I accomplish it, it's gonna cement me as one of the greatest sideshow performers of all time.
The balance, especially.
You have to change your entire center of gravity.
You're trying to balance your weight on one point at the top of your body, and the rest of your body won't allow it.
Phoenix, maybe Creature, you all wanna see if you all can do a one-armed handstand? - Possibly.
- Let's go, Creature.
- One handed.
- Right.
[Screams.]
- That was a girl scream.
- That was.
You know how scary this is right now? All right, man, let's do it.
Okay, here I am all right.
- Ah, ah - I can't get it.
I've always said, legs are over-rated.
[Laughing.]
- Hey, George.
- What do you say, kid? I'm back for my first palm reading lesson.
I'm curious what you might see in my palm that relates to me expanding "The Freakshow" to other areas.
Let me see your hand.
What do you see there? This is the finger of ambition.
Your fate line shows exceptionally good results.
That's a big mark in your favor.
You're gonna make a lot of money.
Road show.
You see a road show? George seeing that we should take the show on the road only validates what I've been feeling in my heart.
I know this is our destiny, and I hope the family can see it, too.
Well, you wanna come out on the road with me? Oh, sure.
You'll read palms under the tent? Sure.
[Chuckling.]
- Well, here we are.
- Wow! Hollywood Boulevard.
Now, Short E.
has never been to LA, so what I've decided is, we're gonna take the whole "Freakshow" family and we're gonna take him down to Hollywood.
That's the best place to see the most in a short period of time.
This is great, isn't it, Short E.
? This is cool I like this.
- Gravity it's the gravity.
- Wait hold on, Short E.
! - Wow! - Tallest man in America.
One, two, three.
- All right.
- Awesome! - Hell yeah.
- Let's eat and go shopping.
[Collective chatter.]
Could you all believe how everyone was, like, gathering around us out there? - That was nuts.
- Crazy.
It almost felt like the Addams family.
- [Laughter.]
- That was that was crazy.
They were taking pictures of all of us.
- That was awesome.
- That was cool.
- Yeah.
- Is it just me, or does "The Freakshow" work everywhere we go.
- Depends I mean, if we - Well, come on.
It it worked in Florida.
- Yeah, but that's Florida.
- Venice Beach.
Okay, how about little, small town, USA? I got one input to put it on this.
I say, Freakshow is a rolling stone.
Wherever our hat is, is our home.
Is our home that's right.
- Yeah! - Would you risk everything? - Are you that confident? - I would.
I feel like Danielle's a hater.
- I am not a hater! - Haters gonna hate, and that's all she wants to do.
No, I'm just not in a fantasy world.
Like, I'm thinking about all, like, what you would have to do.
Are you being the voice of reason? - Thank you.
- Is that what that is? She's being mom.
She's being the voice of the treason.
- I I'm being a mom.
- Oh, the voice of treason.
The way I look at it, we could go right here.
There's not even that many people, but I guarantee you, if I go down there and start calling people, there'll be a crowd here.
I wanna prove to Danielle that we can do this anywhere and it will work.
People are curious, and they're looking for wonder in their life, and that's what we deliver every time we do a show.
- Oh, my gosh! - I wanna know something.
- Are y'all ready? - I'm ready.
- Are you ready, George? - I assure you, security will have us stop before you get started.
Let me do the talking.
Morgue? I've been arrested performing here before.
You've been arrested performing here? - Performing right here.
- For what? So I'm down Uh, having dangerous items.
- Of course.
- So, I'm down, - but gotta be quick.
- Okay.
George George can watch for cops.
- [Laughter.]
- All right, have you got-have you got your stuff with you? Yeah, I always have stuff with me.
Okay Asia, have you got all your stuff with you? - Mmm-Hmm.
- Short E.
? You been working on that handstand? Yeah, I've been working on it.
You came out here to be a part of the show.
You ready to be a part of the real show? I'm ready let's let's do it.
- So, let's do it.
- Let's go.
- Are you are you down? - I think you guys are crazy.
- [Laughter.]
- Are y'all ready? [Collective chatter.]
Don't talk about it let's be about it.
Yeah.
Short E.
comes to California and he's gonna get arrested with us.
[Laughter.]
I'll get him out if he does.
And I've never been to jail before, so Face down, arms up.
[Laughter.]
Where's all of your stuff? In the trunk.
I have a lot of weird stuff in my car.
I have a sword and a saw.
Not all of it's sideshow related, either.
And look at all the people.
All they can do is just [Indistinct.]
.
Yeah, that's true They're starting to look.
They're all starting to look.
They're already curious about what's going on, who we are.
Hey, everybody, gather around.
Asia, come over here, honey.
Listen everybody's kinda working with me.
No one's really tripped out, but once we start it, we might get in trouble.
- So we gotta pull it off quick.
- Right yeah.
If you hear me, give the words, I'll let you know, "that's it," and we'll cut the show, and as Morgue said, we don't wanna get arrested.
Everybody grab something and we'll meet at the car.
Right the idea is, you get stuff and we'll go.
- All right.
- Okay? But, for right now, you all go over there, and let's just start it.
Folks, we're known as "the world famous Venice Beach Freakshow," and if you're ready to see the strangest show on earth, all you people up there, all you people right there, all you people around this stage, make some real noise! - [Cheers and applause.]
- Come on, folks! Okay, here we go.
Give it up for miss Asia Ray! [Cheers and applause.]
Thank you all right, here we go.
- [Cheers and applause.]
- Thank you.
[Cheers and applause.]
All right, the stunt I'm about to do uses this meat hook.
This took me three years, to stretch out the cartilage inside of my skull, to be able to do this.
It's a very painful process.
Watch what he's about to do.
It's going into his mouth, and out His nose.
Look.
He is connecting the circular saw to the hook that's going through his entire skull.
And watch what he's about to do.
Make some noise, folks! - [Cheers and applause.]
- Make some noise Come on! Make some real noise! Oh, my gosh! Our next unusual performer, Short E.
Dangerously, the half-man! - [Cheers and applause.]
- Thank you, thank you, thank you very much! Folks, a long time ago, there was a man that went by the name of Johnny Eck.
He was known as "The King of the Freaks.
" He was born just like Short E.
here.
There was one signature move that Johnny Eck did, that people talk about to this day.
If he pulls this off, each and every one of you will be witnessing a moment in "Freakshow" history.
[Cheers and applause.]
When Short E.
pulled off the one-armed handstand and his other hand went straight in the sky, it was like slow-motion, and I could see all the faces of the people.
They were cheering, they were excited, they were full of wonder and amazement, and I knew he had become the modern day Johnny Eck.
And I knew, right then, that our dream of expanding "The Freakshow" could come true.
I know we can do it mark my words.
Because anything is possible at "The Freakshow.
" Did I tell you? Yes, you did.
[Collective.]
Aw.
There you go, son that's for you.
Okay, I got something for the fellas.
- Right here, son.
- Excuse me, sir.
- I need to see a permit.
- Okay, I'll tell ya what.
Let me give this young man We'll be done right now.
- Get I get your name, too? - Yes, sir, you can.
Let me give this young man his t-shirt, and let me give this young lady right there a t-shirt.
All right, folks, give it up! That's the end of the show! - [Cheers and applause.]
- Can I get your name? Okay, no problem.
You got it, you got it, you got it.