Stuck in the Middle (2016) s02e13 Episode Script
Stuck in a Gold Medal Performance
1 Harley.
Harley! She can't mean me.
It's an unwritten rule.
Upperclassmen don't talk to freshmen, even if they share a bathroom at home.
I learned that lesson my first day of high school.
Hey, Rachel, could you help me with - I need to talk to you.
- Why? What happened? Did the house burn down? - Did Dad get bitten by a shark? - Relax.
I'm here to offer you an opportunity of a lifetime.
I just joined the spirit squad.
You, on the spirit squad? And I thought you talking to me was the weird part.
I can be all rah-rah, especially if I get to leave early on Fridays and ride the bus with all the hotties on the basketball team.
There we go, there's the Rachel we all know and love.
Well, you're about to love me even more.
I'm in charge of firing up the crowd, and I thought you could whip up something cool for when the team takes the court.
What are you guys doing now? The spirit squad does a tunnel of jazz hands as the team runs through.
Go, Terriers! Mm.
I'm surprised you didn't call me sooner.
It's not exactly a freshman position.
I had to really talk you up to the girls.
My nerdy sister makes stuff like this all the time.
And I'm sure she's available.
It's not like she'll have other plans.
It's a win-win.
I get to look good in front of the squad, and you get to look cool in front of the school without actually being cool.
Is that you being all rah-rah? 'Cause it needs some work.
And the game's only two days from now.
You don't have to do anything epic, just something better than jazz hands.
And I'm the one who doesn't look cool? Nothing epic? Who is she talking to? I don't do anything halfway.
One time I did something three quarters of the way, and even that felt weird.
You come to Harley, you get epic.
Consider it done.
Thanks for giving me the chance.
You know it.
I take care of my sisters.
Rachel, have you seen my? Hey, hey, hey, hey Sometimes it feels like things are outta control Like you're living in a circus Tryin' to figure out your way in the world Where you're at is kinda perfect So turn it up, turn it up Do your thing, don't stop Let the games begin, let's jump right in I wanna get stuck with you In the middle of the party And we're just getting started I wanna get stuck with you In the eye of the tornado, rowin' in the same boat I wanna get stuck with you Get stuck in the middle with you I wanna get stuck with you Hey, you're back! How was Boston? Wait, she was in Boston? We have seven kids! I can't stay on top of everything.
Did the signing go well? Did you get to meet Laurie Hernandez? Mom, please use her full name.
Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez.
I did meet her.
We really hit it off.
It is such an honor to meet you.
Could you make that out "to my close personal friend Georgie Diaz," or however far you get before my leg cramps up.
"To my close personal friend Georgie" What was it? - Diaz.
- Right.
It's always nice to meet another Latina athlete.
Did you hear that? She called me an athlete! And, there's the leg cramp.
That's me! Big time athlete, big time Latina.
That's what I'm talking about.
Own it! Oh, yeah, my family is way Latino.
The Latino-est.
You know, all the traditional customs, the dances, and my mom makes the most amazing authentic dishes all the time.
Well, I appreciate the lie about my cooking, but you leaned into that Latino thing a little hard.
Yeah, hold that thought.
I'm not finished.
That all sounds amazing.
I'm on the road so much, I can't remember the last time I had a traditional, home-cooked meal.
Well, Marshport's not far.
If you're ever in the neighborhood, you're always welcome at our house.
Really? She's finding herself in our neighborhood - this Friday! - This is amazing! Wait, I'm cooking for an Olympic athlete? Now I get the panic in your voice.
Finally, Marshport is more than a pee break between Boston and New York.
Actually, she's on her way to New York.
Ooh, then I gotta fix the bathroom.
Can't have a gold medalist using a shoe to keep the door closed.
That's not the only problem! I told her we were super Latino! Look at this place! We are way low on culture.
No flags, no figurines, no paintings Hey, we gave you a quinceañera in a hurricane.
I think we represent pretty well.
I don't want Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez to get here and feel like I duped her! I don't even speak Spanish! Those two years of French I took aren't going to do me any good.
Ah, je suis.
I don't even speak French.
It could be worse! At least Laurie is coming when Lewie and Beast are out of town on that Scout trip.
Wait, Lewie and Beast are out of town? Am I crazy, or is Rachel waving me over to the upperclass quad? I don't know what she's up to but it's gonna be hilarious.
Hi, Quinn.
Okay.
Bye, Quinn.
Hey, can you swing by the cafeteria? Tell them what you're gonna do for the game in a way that doesn't totally put them to sleep, like you normally do when you talk inventions.
It's a surprise.
Let's just say, and not overselling anything, it'll be the greatest start to any basketball game in Marshport history! First I'm gonna hit 'em with the lasers.
Then the music kicks in.
Then you might be asking, "How does this all work?" Well, the key is when the light refracts off of No one's asking.
Just make the pretty lights happen.
fraction crowd.
But we are a spirit crowd, and what you just said sounds really cool, and for sure better than jazz hands.
So lame.
Yeah, lame.
That's over now.
And this also over.
Yeah.
Donde ester the bibliotheque.
No, no.
COMPUTER: Where is the train station? ¿Dónde está la estación de ferrocarril? Donde esterfer Fer Oh, forget this.
What's happening here? I've gotta learn Spanish in two days.
I have to make a good impression on Laurie Hernandez.
By asking her where the train station is? Sorry.
They don't make tapes that teach "You have to keep the bathroom door closed with a shoe.
" Ooh, poor Laurie.
What's harder, a double backflip or dinner with us? It took laser focus, but I put together an awesome laser light show.
Get ready.
Everybody will be on their feet when the team comes out.
Actually, they'll be on their feet for me.
Don't tell the team.
(marching band music playing) Hey, Quinn.
It's okay, I'll carry myself out.
There's my favorite sister.
You ready? Unless you're waiting on someone from the Nobel Prize committee.
I'm ready.
Go ahead.
Start.
Hello, Marshport High! Let's show the Terriers some love with help from Rachel Diaz 's little sister.
Whoo! Whoo-hoo! (no audio) (button beeping) That's you, Harley.
Just hold on.
(zapping) (crowd gasps) What's going on? Just a glitch.
All good.
(microphone feedback) (engine groans) You loved it last year.
You're gonna love it again! Jazz hands! Come on, girls.
Come on! (spits) Do you have any idea what it's like to be humiliated in front of the whole school? I was covered in foam while people threw pretzels at me.
I think I have a vague idea.
You said it would work.
What happened? A wire probably came loose.
In the state it's in now, it - It's hard to tell.
- I really put myself out for you.
I talked to you in public.
I waved at you, and this is how you pay me back? I can't even imagine what this is going to do to me! Hey, ladies, how's the math Who does that? I'm sorry.
It was a fluke.
Humiliating failure in a gym is Georgie's thing, not mine.
Give me another chance.
There's a pep rally Friday.
I can have the laser box ready for that.
I'd like to say no, but I'm desperate.
Fine.
Get that explodinator up and running.
That's not what it's called.
When it works, you can name it.
(TV sports playing) (romantic music plays on TV) Hey, we were watching that! Sorry.
Our family's favorite telenovela, La Cabeza y el Corazon is about to start.
Since when do we watch that? Since I told Laurie we've been watching for ten years.
Take notes.
I'll need a report by the end of the day tomorrow.
Gotta run to my Latin dance class.
Laurie Hernandez and being forced to binge-watch TV? If there's chips in the cupboard, this may be the best day ever.
Hey, it's Rosita.
Or, it could be her clone.
What? Abuela's been watching for years.
Great! Ethan, you have a study partner.
Mom, what are you making for the big dinner? - I was gonna do enchiladas.
- Not authentic enough.
We need a meal Laurie can't buy at a 24-hour mart.
They have those at the 24-hour mart? Why have I been cooking all these years? (sighs) I wish Abuela lived closer.
Oh, can you make that amazing barbacoa she serves every time we visit? That's gonna be a lot of work.
Mom, Dad and I are willing to watch a lot of TV.
We all have to pitch in.
Just like when the whole family pitched in to throw Valentina a surprise wedding.
Hmm, not that it lasted.
EF-TF checking in.
You've been working on this thing for two days straight.
Do you want to take a break and watch some telenovelas? Today we find out if Yolanda's sister is her mother.
Can't.
Busy.
Wow, really coming along! This thing is gonna be killer.
That's the junk I didn't use.
The laser's over here.
Ah, yes, that is impressive! It works, right? It's going to be great.
I just tested it.
And retested it.
Then I retested the retest.
Oh, so that was your problem.
You didn't test it last time.
No, I tested it last time, too.
Oh, so this time you used totally different parts.
Not really.
It's the same parts as last time.
But this time it's gonna work because? Because I said so.
Well, I'm sold! You're the scientist! EF-TF out.
Because I said so? That's not a good scientific reason.
That's the same thing Mom says when she punishes us.
I may be in trouble here.
Hey, are you sure you tightened me enough? I'm talking to you.
Yeah, I I tightened you.
Maybe or maybe not.
Ooh, I hope none of these other wires come loose.
Sure are a lot of us.
Sure are.
Maybe too many.
Back off, she's Harley.
She knows what she's doing.
Thank you, invention bag.
Sure would be embarrassing to have this go kablooey in front of the whole school again.
I was there.
Foam? Not a good look on you.
She's not gonna choke.
We'll see! Choke! Choke! - Choke! Choke! Choke! - No! No! No! No! (manic laughter) Hello? Yup.
I'm falling apart.
(marching band music playing) Have you seen Harley? Nuestra hermana? In English.
I don't have time for this.
The pep rally's about to start.
Where is she? What am I gonna do for entertainment? Maybe I can help.
I've taken one and a half salsa dance lessons.
I'm not that desperate.
Sorry, invention bag.
Time to take a break from each other.
(phone dings, vibrates) I can't believe this.
Harley's bailing on me.
It's time to start! Where's your sister? She's, uh She's right here.
Georgie, you're up.
Great! Oh! Now, would either of you happen to have any maracas? I'll make it work.
I'll make it work.
Laurie will be here any minute! How's the barbacoa coming? There was a hitch.
Turns out, Abuela makes it with a goat's head.
That's what we've been eating? She didn't want to tell us 'cause she didn't think we'd eat it if we knew.
I'd say that was pretty "baaad" of her.
Mom, too soon.
I got all the ingredients.
Then I read the rest of the recipe.
The head has to be smoked overnight in a pit dug in the ground.
I don't like recipes Well, that explains why Abuela's let abiceps are so defined.
And the scorpion peppers Abuela uses? Only slightly less dangerous than actual scorpions.
So, barbacoa, not happening.
Great.
We're stuck with enchiladas? I don't have time to make those now.
I froze an extra lasagna last week.
I'm gonna serve that.
But I promised Laurie an authentic meal! Maybe we could scoop it into taco shells.
(doorbell rings) She's here! What's that? Serape blankets to liven up the house.
And cover the stains on the sofa.
Nice! - Georgie! - Laurie, hola! Welcome to our casa.
Thanks.
I'm so glad to be here.
This is my mamacita and papi.
Hi! So honored to meet you.
Big fans.
The Olympics and that dancing show.
I mean, the way you did that samba, oh! Dad, stand down.
Hi, I'm Ethan.
I'm so happy you're here, I'm even missing my favorite show, El Cabeza y el Corazon.
I don't really watch that show.
Well, it's not too late to start.
I mean, this is the week we find out about Carmen's face transplant.
(all clearing throats) Can I get you some horchata? Actually, just some water would be fine.
Okay.
Oh, coming up! Hello, Laurie.
I'm a gymnast, too.
So, what's higher than a gold? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I nailed it.
She's adorable! In small doses.
My other sisters aren't here yet, and when you're as close as we are, you're not happy until the whole family is together.
- (door slams) - You left me standing at a pep rally with no pep! Sorry I'm so bad at doing your job for you! (Rachel grunts in exasperation) - Hi! - Nice to meet you.
These are my sisters, Harley and Rachel.
They're also best friends.
I hope you're hungry.
I'm serving my famous lasagna.
Or, as we call it, unrolled enchiladas.
Thanks so much for including me in your family dinner.
Georgie was right.
I can tell how close you all are.
Not close enough to show up.
How nice of you to serve me.
Here, have some salad! Thanks.
You know what you need? Whoa! (chuckles) Who wants bread? Why don't you guys go outside and, uh, make sure the dog's okay.
Yeah! The dog.
The one who's been fighting with the cat.
Tell them to stay out there until they stop embarrassing us.
(sighing) We have a dog? I don't know how you could possibly explain, but go ahead and try.
I freaked out, okay? I was afraid the laser was going to mess up again.
The thing about inventing is you need to imagine what can work, and now, all I can imagine is what won't.
Then the wires started talking to me, which would've been really disturbing if my invention bag hadn't told them off.
What is this, the insanity defense? Look.
I'm sorry.
I just figured it was better to stand you up than to embarrass you again.
Oh, you didn't want to embarrass me? (salsa music playing) Olé! You promised you'd be there, and you let your family down.
Like you've never let anyone in the family down? Sometimes, yeah, but you're Harley, and people expect more from you.
I'm going to the game.
So, Laurie, as a guest of honor, you get the biggest pieces of "la sagna.
" This is really spicy.
I don't know why.
I just added a little salt and oregan Oh, my goodness! Georgia, did you put something in here? Just a half cup of our Latino heritage! Oh, what the heck.
The scorpion peppers? I just wanted to make sure Laurie liked it! Excuse me.
Milk! Whoa! Ho ho ho! ETHAN: I can't get it off! Aah! Is that a goat head? (groans in frustration) This swing taken? I feel like there's something weird going on around here, and not just because you have animal head in your fridge.
You wanna talk? The thing is, having you here made me realize something.
My whole life, I thought I was a Latina, but I don't the dances, I don't speak the language, and let's face the facts, we both know that was just lasagna.
All that cultural stuff's great, but to me, being a good Latina means being a good person, - which you are.
- You think? Anyone can see that in two seconds.
There were 500 other people in that line.
Why do you think I'm here? That means a lot, especially since I almost just burned your mouth off.
(sneezes) Sorry.
I was up there feeling sorry for myself.
Then it got too awkward to leave.
It's been a hard day for the Diaz sisters.
She bailed on Rachel.
Oh, so that's why she wanted to clock you with the bread.
Yeah, I had it coming.
I left her hanging because I was afraid I was going to mess up.
Oh, I know all about messing up.
I've broken my wrist twice, fractured my elbow, dislocated my kneecap, and smashed my teeth in doing gymnastics.
Really? I only know about the gold medal part.
Well, they don't give you a medal for the messing-up part, but you're gonna do that a bunch if you want to get to the gold medal part.
You are really good at giving pep talks! Thanks.
I'm killing it solving other people's problems today! Maybe I can help fix things with that dog and cat.
No.
They're good.
Settled it on their own.
Okay, Marshport, big game, cross-town rivals.
Let's just get this over with.
(music playing) Please welcome our special guest, Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez! (cheering) You will break through Raising up is all you need Go, Laurie! Whoo! You will break through Then you're gonna just compete You will break through That was awesome! Let's bring out your Marshport Terriers! Yeah, go Terriers! My sisters did that.
Was that so hard? That was amazing! A hug? In public? Don't get used to it.
- (laughs) - Congratulations.
You made it to the gold medal part.
What about you? You just did, like, 12 backflips after eating scorpion peppers.
Yeah.
Next time we meet again, Georgie, try not to poison me.
There's gonna be a next time? All right! Oh! There's that leg cramp.
Harley! She can't mean me.
It's an unwritten rule.
Upperclassmen don't talk to freshmen, even if they share a bathroom at home.
I learned that lesson my first day of high school.
Hey, Rachel, could you help me with - I need to talk to you.
- Why? What happened? Did the house burn down? - Did Dad get bitten by a shark? - Relax.
I'm here to offer you an opportunity of a lifetime.
I just joined the spirit squad.
You, on the spirit squad? And I thought you talking to me was the weird part.
I can be all rah-rah, especially if I get to leave early on Fridays and ride the bus with all the hotties on the basketball team.
There we go, there's the Rachel we all know and love.
Well, you're about to love me even more.
I'm in charge of firing up the crowd, and I thought you could whip up something cool for when the team takes the court.
What are you guys doing now? The spirit squad does a tunnel of jazz hands as the team runs through.
Go, Terriers! Mm.
I'm surprised you didn't call me sooner.
It's not exactly a freshman position.
I had to really talk you up to the girls.
My nerdy sister makes stuff like this all the time.
And I'm sure she's available.
It's not like she'll have other plans.
It's a win-win.
I get to look good in front of the squad, and you get to look cool in front of the school without actually being cool.
Is that you being all rah-rah? 'Cause it needs some work.
And the game's only two days from now.
You don't have to do anything epic, just something better than jazz hands.
And I'm the one who doesn't look cool? Nothing epic? Who is she talking to? I don't do anything halfway.
One time I did something three quarters of the way, and even that felt weird.
You come to Harley, you get epic.
Consider it done.
Thanks for giving me the chance.
You know it.
I take care of my sisters.
Rachel, have you seen my? Hey, hey, hey, hey Sometimes it feels like things are outta control Like you're living in a circus Tryin' to figure out your way in the world Where you're at is kinda perfect So turn it up, turn it up Do your thing, don't stop Let the games begin, let's jump right in I wanna get stuck with you In the middle of the party And we're just getting started I wanna get stuck with you In the eye of the tornado, rowin' in the same boat I wanna get stuck with you Get stuck in the middle with you I wanna get stuck with you Hey, you're back! How was Boston? Wait, she was in Boston? We have seven kids! I can't stay on top of everything.
Did the signing go well? Did you get to meet Laurie Hernandez? Mom, please use her full name.
Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez.
I did meet her.
We really hit it off.
It is such an honor to meet you.
Could you make that out "to my close personal friend Georgie Diaz," or however far you get before my leg cramps up.
"To my close personal friend Georgie" What was it? - Diaz.
- Right.
It's always nice to meet another Latina athlete.
Did you hear that? She called me an athlete! And, there's the leg cramp.
That's me! Big time athlete, big time Latina.
That's what I'm talking about.
Own it! Oh, yeah, my family is way Latino.
The Latino-est.
You know, all the traditional customs, the dances, and my mom makes the most amazing authentic dishes all the time.
Well, I appreciate the lie about my cooking, but you leaned into that Latino thing a little hard.
Yeah, hold that thought.
I'm not finished.
That all sounds amazing.
I'm on the road so much, I can't remember the last time I had a traditional, home-cooked meal.
Well, Marshport's not far.
If you're ever in the neighborhood, you're always welcome at our house.
Really? She's finding herself in our neighborhood - this Friday! - This is amazing! Wait, I'm cooking for an Olympic athlete? Now I get the panic in your voice.
Finally, Marshport is more than a pee break between Boston and New York.
Actually, she's on her way to New York.
Ooh, then I gotta fix the bathroom.
Can't have a gold medalist using a shoe to keep the door closed.
That's not the only problem! I told her we were super Latino! Look at this place! We are way low on culture.
No flags, no figurines, no paintings Hey, we gave you a quinceañera in a hurricane.
I think we represent pretty well.
I don't want Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez to get here and feel like I duped her! I don't even speak Spanish! Those two years of French I took aren't going to do me any good.
Ah, je suis.
I don't even speak French.
It could be worse! At least Laurie is coming when Lewie and Beast are out of town on that Scout trip.
Wait, Lewie and Beast are out of town? Am I crazy, or is Rachel waving me over to the upperclass quad? I don't know what she's up to but it's gonna be hilarious.
Hi, Quinn.
Okay.
Bye, Quinn.
Hey, can you swing by the cafeteria? Tell them what you're gonna do for the game in a way that doesn't totally put them to sleep, like you normally do when you talk inventions.
It's a surprise.
Let's just say, and not overselling anything, it'll be the greatest start to any basketball game in Marshport history! First I'm gonna hit 'em with the lasers.
Then the music kicks in.
Then you might be asking, "How does this all work?" Well, the key is when the light refracts off of No one's asking.
Just make the pretty lights happen.
fraction crowd.
But we are a spirit crowd, and what you just said sounds really cool, and for sure better than jazz hands.
So lame.
Yeah, lame.
That's over now.
And this also over.
Yeah.
Donde ester the bibliotheque.
No, no.
COMPUTER: Where is the train station? ¿Dónde está la estación de ferrocarril? Donde esterfer Fer Oh, forget this.
What's happening here? I've gotta learn Spanish in two days.
I have to make a good impression on Laurie Hernandez.
By asking her where the train station is? Sorry.
They don't make tapes that teach "You have to keep the bathroom door closed with a shoe.
" Ooh, poor Laurie.
What's harder, a double backflip or dinner with us? It took laser focus, but I put together an awesome laser light show.
Get ready.
Everybody will be on their feet when the team comes out.
Actually, they'll be on their feet for me.
Don't tell the team.
(marching band music playing) Hey, Quinn.
It's okay, I'll carry myself out.
There's my favorite sister.
You ready? Unless you're waiting on someone from the Nobel Prize committee.
I'm ready.
Go ahead.
Start.
Hello, Marshport High! Let's show the Terriers some love with help from Rachel Diaz 's little sister.
Whoo! Whoo-hoo! (no audio) (button beeping) That's you, Harley.
Just hold on.
(zapping) (crowd gasps) What's going on? Just a glitch.
All good.
(microphone feedback) (engine groans) You loved it last year.
You're gonna love it again! Jazz hands! Come on, girls.
Come on! (spits) Do you have any idea what it's like to be humiliated in front of the whole school? I was covered in foam while people threw pretzels at me.
I think I have a vague idea.
You said it would work.
What happened? A wire probably came loose.
In the state it's in now, it - It's hard to tell.
- I really put myself out for you.
I talked to you in public.
I waved at you, and this is how you pay me back? I can't even imagine what this is going to do to me! Hey, ladies, how's the math Who does that? I'm sorry.
It was a fluke.
Humiliating failure in a gym is Georgie's thing, not mine.
Give me another chance.
There's a pep rally Friday.
I can have the laser box ready for that.
I'd like to say no, but I'm desperate.
Fine.
Get that explodinator up and running.
That's not what it's called.
When it works, you can name it.
(TV sports playing) (romantic music plays on TV) Hey, we were watching that! Sorry.
Our family's favorite telenovela, La Cabeza y el Corazon is about to start.
Since when do we watch that? Since I told Laurie we've been watching for ten years.
Take notes.
I'll need a report by the end of the day tomorrow.
Gotta run to my Latin dance class.
Laurie Hernandez and being forced to binge-watch TV? If there's chips in the cupboard, this may be the best day ever.
Hey, it's Rosita.
Or, it could be her clone.
What? Abuela's been watching for years.
Great! Ethan, you have a study partner.
Mom, what are you making for the big dinner? - I was gonna do enchiladas.
- Not authentic enough.
We need a meal Laurie can't buy at a 24-hour mart.
They have those at the 24-hour mart? Why have I been cooking all these years? (sighs) I wish Abuela lived closer.
Oh, can you make that amazing barbacoa she serves every time we visit? That's gonna be a lot of work.
Mom, Dad and I are willing to watch a lot of TV.
We all have to pitch in.
Just like when the whole family pitched in to throw Valentina a surprise wedding.
Hmm, not that it lasted.
EF-TF checking in.
You've been working on this thing for two days straight.
Do you want to take a break and watch some telenovelas? Today we find out if Yolanda's sister is her mother.
Can't.
Busy.
Wow, really coming along! This thing is gonna be killer.
That's the junk I didn't use.
The laser's over here.
Ah, yes, that is impressive! It works, right? It's going to be great.
I just tested it.
And retested it.
Then I retested the retest.
Oh, so that was your problem.
You didn't test it last time.
No, I tested it last time, too.
Oh, so this time you used totally different parts.
Not really.
It's the same parts as last time.
But this time it's gonna work because? Because I said so.
Well, I'm sold! You're the scientist! EF-TF out.
Because I said so? That's not a good scientific reason.
That's the same thing Mom says when she punishes us.
I may be in trouble here.
Hey, are you sure you tightened me enough? I'm talking to you.
Yeah, I I tightened you.
Maybe or maybe not.
Ooh, I hope none of these other wires come loose.
Sure are a lot of us.
Sure are.
Maybe too many.
Back off, she's Harley.
She knows what she's doing.
Thank you, invention bag.
Sure would be embarrassing to have this go kablooey in front of the whole school again.
I was there.
Foam? Not a good look on you.
She's not gonna choke.
We'll see! Choke! Choke! - Choke! Choke! Choke! - No! No! No! No! (manic laughter) Hello? Yup.
I'm falling apart.
(marching band music playing) Have you seen Harley? Nuestra hermana? In English.
I don't have time for this.
The pep rally's about to start.
Where is she? What am I gonna do for entertainment? Maybe I can help.
I've taken one and a half salsa dance lessons.
I'm not that desperate.
Sorry, invention bag.
Time to take a break from each other.
(phone dings, vibrates) I can't believe this.
Harley's bailing on me.
It's time to start! Where's your sister? She's, uh She's right here.
Georgie, you're up.
Great! Oh! Now, would either of you happen to have any maracas? I'll make it work.
I'll make it work.
Laurie will be here any minute! How's the barbacoa coming? There was a hitch.
Turns out, Abuela makes it with a goat's head.
That's what we've been eating? She didn't want to tell us 'cause she didn't think we'd eat it if we knew.
I'd say that was pretty "baaad" of her.
Mom, too soon.
I got all the ingredients.
Then I read the rest of the recipe.
The head has to be smoked overnight in a pit dug in the ground.
I don't like recipes Well, that explains why Abuela's let abiceps are so defined.
And the scorpion peppers Abuela uses? Only slightly less dangerous than actual scorpions.
So, barbacoa, not happening.
Great.
We're stuck with enchiladas? I don't have time to make those now.
I froze an extra lasagna last week.
I'm gonna serve that.
But I promised Laurie an authentic meal! Maybe we could scoop it into taco shells.
(doorbell rings) She's here! What's that? Serape blankets to liven up the house.
And cover the stains on the sofa.
Nice! - Georgie! - Laurie, hola! Welcome to our casa.
Thanks.
I'm so glad to be here.
This is my mamacita and papi.
Hi! So honored to meet you.
Big fans.
The Olympics and that dancing show.
I mean, the way you did that samba, oh! Dad, stand down.
Hi, I'm Ethan.
I'm so happy you're here, I'm even missing my favorite show, El Cabeza y el Corazon.
I don't really watch that show.
Well, it's not too late to start.
I mean, this is the week we find out about Carmen's face transplant.
(all clearing throats) Can I get you some horchata? Actually, just some water would be fine.
Okay.
Oh, coming up! Hello, Laurie.
I'm a gymnast, too.
So, what's higher than a gold? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I nailed it.
She's adorable! In small doses.
My other sisters aren't here yet, and when you're as close as we are, you're not happy until the whole family is together.
- (door slams) - You left me standing at a pep rally with no pep! Sorry I'm so bad at doing your job for you! (Rachel grunts in exasperation) - Hi! - Nice to meet you.
These are my sisters, Harley and Rachel.
They're also best friends.
I hope you're hungry.
I'm serving my famous lasagna.
Or, as we call it, unrolled enchiladas.
Thanks so much for including me in your family dinner.
Georgie was right.
I can tell how close you all are.
Not close enough to show up.
How nice of you to serve me.
Here, have some salad! Thanks.
You know what you need? Whoa! (chuckles) Who wants bread? Why don't you guys go outside and, uh, make sure the dog's okay.
Yeah! The dog.
The one who's been fighting with the cat.
Tell them to stay out there until they stop embarrassing us.
(sighing) We have a dog? I don't know how you could possibly explain, but go ahead and try.
I freaked out, okay? I was afraid the laser was going to mess up again.
The thing about inventing is you need to imagine what can work, and now, all I can imagine is what won't.
Then the wires started talking to me, which would've been really disturbing if my invention bag hadn't told them off.
What is this, the insanity defense? Look.
I'm sorry.
I just figured it was better to stand you up than to embarrass you again.
Oh, you didn't want to embarrass me? (salsa music playing) Olé! You promised you'd be there, and you let your family down.
Like you've never let anyone in the family down? Sometimes, yeah, but you're Harley, and people expect more from you.
I'm going to the game.
So, Laurie, as a guest of honor, you get the biggest pieces of "la sagna.
" This is really spicy.
I don't know why.
I just added a little salt and oregan Oh, my goodness! Georgia, did you put something in here? Just a half cup of our Latino heritage! Oh, what the heck.
The scorpion peppers? I just wanted to make sure Laurie liked it! Excuse me.
Milk! Whoa! Ho ho ho! ETHAN: I can't get it off! Aah! Is that a goat head? (groans in frustration) This swing taken? I feel like there's something weird going on around here, and not just because you have animal head in your fridge.
You wanna talk? The thing is, having you here made me realize something.
My whole life, I thought I was a Latina, but I don't the dances, I don't speak the language, and let's face the facts, we both know that was just lasagna.
All that cultural stuff's great, but to me, being a good Latina means being a good person, - which you are.
- You think? Anyone can see that in two seconds.
There were 500 other people in that line.
Why do you think I'm here? That means a lot, especially since I almost just burned your mouth off.
(sneezes) Sorry.
I was up there feeling sorry for myself.
Then it got too awkward to leave.
It's been a hard day for the Diaz sisters.
She bailed on Rachel.
Oh, so that's why she wanted to clock you with the bread.
Yeah, I had it coming.
I left her hanging because I was afraid I was going to mess up.
Oh, I know all about messing up.
I've broken my wrist twice, fractured my elbow, dislocated my kneecap, and smashed my teeth in doing gymnastics.
Really? I only know about the gold medal part.
Well, they don't give you a medal for the messing-up part, but you're gonna do that a bunch if you want to get to the gold medal part.
You are really good at giving pep talks! Thanks.
I'm killing it solving other people's problems today! Maybe I can help fix things with that dog and cat.
No.
They're good.
Settled it on their own.
Okay, Marshport, big game, cross-town rivals.
Let's just get this over with.
(music playing) Please welcome our special guest, Olympic gold medalist Laurie Hernandez! (cheering) You will break through Raising up is all you need Go, Laurie! Whoo! You will break through Then you're gonna just compete You will break through That was awesome! Let's bring out your Marshport Terriers! Yeah, go Terriers! My sisters did that.
Was that so hard? That was amazing! A hug? In public? Don't get used to it.
- (laughs) - Congratulations.
You made it to the gold medal part.
What about you? You just did, like, 12 backflips after eating scorpion peppers.
Yeah.
Next time we meet again, Georgie, try not to poison me.
There's gonna be a next time? All right! Oh! There's that leg cramp.