The Ghost and Molly McGee (2021) s02e13 Episode Script

1
(laughing maniacally)
-I can't believe you're all mine ♪
-Uh, what?
You and me for all time ♪
-Ugh!
-I'm never, ever ♪
Ever gonna be alone again ♪
-Oh, boy.
-The dream team, you and me ♪
For all eternity?
-For all eternity! ♪
-(whimpers)
It's the Ghost ♪
It's the Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
I've been cursed, it's the worst ♪
MOLLY: Now you're stuck with me ♪
We're never gonna be apart ♪
Is there a way to hit "restart"? ♪
-Nope!
-We're the Ghost ♪
Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
-That's me!
-Well, that's she.
SCRATCH AND MOLLY:
The Ghost and Molly McGee! ♪
(lively music)
(projector clicking)
(roaring)
(screeching)
MISS LIGHTFOOT:
As global temperatures climb,
scientists agree that
climate change is an urgent problem.
This is an urgent problem!
MISS LIGHTFOOT: Here in Brighton,
we'll face drought,
flooding and extreme storms.
-(bell rings)
-Hmm. That's a bummer to end on.
-I'm trying to think of something happier.
-(whimpering)
I got nothing! Sorry!
Yeesh. Good thing I'm already dead,
'cause this is definitely
a living person problem.
Well, we, living people,
are gonna stop climate change.
But how? I mean, sure,
you can turn off a light bulb,
recycle a can, but it'll never be enough!
Ugh, I must prepare
for the inevitable climate wasteland.
I'm with Molly.
If we go absolutely carbon-zero,
that's gotta make a difference.
How could it not? Let's save the planet!
(pop mellow music)
We can change climate change ♪
Just you and I ♪
It'll be a breeze ♪
We'll plant some trees ♪
And save our seas and sky ♪
Before everything gets too dire ♪
OLLIE: Before everything is on fire ♪
We can change climate cha-uh-uh-ange ♪
We're gonna change us some change-ah! ♪
-(coughing)
-I see a happy cloud ♪
OLLIE: Happy dancing sun ♪
MOLLY: Happy polar bears ♪
BOTH: All singing as one ♪
We're gonna change the world ♪
-We can change climate change ♪
-You can do it ♪
Do it in a snap ♪
Gonna be easy ♪
We've got a solution
To all this pollution ♪
Savin' every polar ice cap ♪
Nailed it!
No more sweeping this under the rug ♪
We're giving Earth a big old hug ♪
We can change climate change ♪
We can change climate change ♪
-We're on a mission ♪
-A zero emission mission ♪
To change us some cha-a-a-ange ♪
Hey, we're gonna change us ♪
And the song stopped?
The song stopped. Sorry.
Composting this food waste
means it will not end up in a landfill.
MAN: Something out here stinks!
Not to mention all the paper and cans
we recycled after school.
(gasps)
Ollie, we are
Carbon zero heroes!
Are you two ready to leave
for Andrea's birthday party?
I can give you a lift across town.
Sorry, Mama.
Carbon zero heroes don't ride in cars.
MOLLY: Hoo-boy. Okay. This is steep.
Why don't they invent something that makes
going up hills easier?
You mean, like, cars?
Oh. Right.
Sore muscles are a small price to pay
for a healthier planet!
Yes. Totally. I agree.
But Andrea's party is going to start soon,
so we gotta put the pedal to the metal!
(grunts)
-(horn honking)
-(scooter revving)
SCRATCH: I can't believe
Molly won't let me
turn on the air conditioning.
My ectoplasm's rated
comfort cool for a reason!
Yeah, Molly's attempts
at climate mitigation are laudable,
but I'm a pragmatic realist.
LIBBY: Welcome
to my zombie apocalypse bunker!
-Nothing can get us here.
-You know zombies aren't real, right?
You know people say
the same thing about ghosts, right?
Touché.
My bunker's got everything.
Murphy beds with zombie-proof blankets.
-That can't be comfortable.
-Zombie bait?
Oh. Don't worry.
It's just strawberry gelatin.
(nervous chuckle)
But the zombies won't know that.
And finally, my Zombie Snare.
Oh, yeah. I've been preparing
for the zombie uprising
for a long time! Whoo!
(laughs)
But climate change
is a more urgent threat.
(Scratch grunts)
Libby, you fascinate me.
-Aha.
-(horse whinnies)
(gasping)
Happy birthday
Andrea!
(giggles)
No spoilers, but let's just say
that time you casually mentioned
your love of handcrafted bracelets
did not go unnoticed.
Thanks, Molly. But the party's over.
You just missed the prize-winning pony.
(sniffs)
I can still smell it, though.
(sniffs)
I think that's us.
As climate change worsens,
basic resources will become scarce,
as well as food, and firewood,
and toilet paper.
-And food!
-I said food.
Yeah, I know. But we need
ten times as much 'cause I'm here now.
We better stock up now
before supplies run out
and the unprepared
are left to fight for scraps.
You know, you sound, like,
overly excited for that scenario
to actually play out. Optics aren't great.
(chuckles)
The thrill of survival is a potent drug.
-(Molly groans)
-Hey! Just in time for pizza and a movie.
We're watching Country Pumpkin III:
Seeds of Doubt.
(sniffs deeply)
-I'm so hungry! Ahh.
-Molly!
We gave up meat and dairy, remember?
-For the environment?
-Oh. You're right. Um
We'll eat whatever
we can find in the garden!
There's gotta be
something delicious out there!
Turnips! Nature's bad
first attempt at the potato.
-We'll have to eat them raw.
-What? Why can't we cook them?
-The stove uses gas.
-Okay. Yep, you're right.
-(chomping)
-Oh! Mm!
-Oh, no!
-(both spitting)
Pah! Pah! Blah
(mutters)
Must! Wash! Tongue!
-(Ollie shrieks)
-Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hold your hoses, Ollie Chen.
We can't waste water.
There's some juice in the fridge!
The fridge uses electricity,
and Brighton's power grid
is only eight percent green!
The rest is fossil fuel generated!
-Oh, my corn!
-(chugging)
(exhales loudly)
So cool and refreshing.
Are you two really not watching
Country Pumpkin III?
(sobs)
We can't!
I'm gonna need you to tell me the plot
in excruciating detail later.
This is still worth it, right?
Of course! We're carbon zero heroes!
(laughs manically)
(pop mellow music)
We can change climate change ♪
I think. No! Of course we can.
Cans! Must hoard cans!
Bike riding is so pleasing ♪
Cold showers aren't freezing.
OLLIE: Who needs pizza when there's
Raw Wheat Bran? Ugh!
It'll be easy for just two kids ♪
To, you know, change entire power grids.
Can we change climate change? ♪
You bet!
BOTH: We can change climate change ♪
Ooh, a raccoon net!
We're having some doubts ♪
But we'll choke down more sprouts ♪
And change us some cha-a-a-ange ♪
Oh, wow, these are delicious.
(hiccups)
Honestly, I could live
in a bunker forever.
There'll be piles of food.
No human interaction.
That's the dream, man.
(grunts)
Who took all the food out of this food?
These rations are meant to last for years
under the harshest conditions.
The trick is to close your eyes
and forget hope.
(gagging)
Oh.
Why didn't you stock up
on anything good? Like ice cream.
It's the apocalypse! There's no ice.
There's no cream!
And there's definitely no ice cream!
-(shrieks)
-However, I am ready
to hunt raccoons for sustenance.
The trick is to smell like them.
(sniffs)
Libby, I was having fun
with this apocalypse stuff, but no more!
We have to stop climate change
for the ice cream!
(knocking on door)
Libby, it's for you.
Okay, Darryl. Here is the list
of everything we have done
for the environment.
Now, calculate our carbon footprint.
Uh, isn't it cheating to ask me
to use my phone?
-Just do it, Darryl!
-Okay.
I'm inputting the data Uh-oh.
(Molly gasps)
-Yes!
-We did it!
We stopped climate change!
We're carbon zero heroes ♪
Uh, Molly? Heh.
Not to interrupt
your embarrassing theme song,
but yeah, I think you put too many zeroes
in "carbon zero hero."
-What? But that's--
-Basically nothing?
We didn't change anything.
We're We're carbon Zero Zeroes.
Which doesn't even sound good.
Get! Shoo! Who goes there?
Libby, it's us. We couldn't
stop climate change.
Can you fit two more in your bunker?
LIBBY: That depends.
Are you prepared to shed
your Old World morals?
Molly! Molly, I'm so glad you're here.
Listen to me. You have
to stop climate change!
I'm sorry, Scratch. I tried. I failed.
You just can't stand by
as the world throws away
its most valuable resource!
-Water?
-Breathable air?
-Hope?
-No, ice cream!
Ice cream is humanity's
greatest invention.
Indoor plumbing is here.
The internet is roundabout here.
And ice cream is way up here!
The silky ice cream.
The crunchy waffle cone.
The humble sprinkles. Oh!
SCRATCH: By themselves, they're good.
But when they come together,
they're great!
Each part working to improve the whole!
-Wait! I see what you're saying, Scratch!
-Yes.
Like rainbow sprinkles,
we can't do this alone!
Right. We all have to work together
to save the environment.
You're using ice cream as a metaphor
for the power of collective action!
Not what I was saying, but yes!
Run, children, run!
Get that ice cream!
MOLLY: Fellow Brightonians!
Like you, we are concerned
about climate change.
Tell 'em to start hoarding ice cream now!
Wha Scratch. Stop, stop, stop!
(grunting)
(clears throat)
The truth is,
this problem is too big
for any of us to solve alone.
Okay. If each person packs five freezers,
we might have enough!
But together, we can make a difference.
All our small actions
can add up to big change!
(Libby grunts)
We can't just douse ourselves
in raccoon musk,
and hide in our well-stocked,
highly-fortified bunkers forever!
We have to be part of the solution.
MOLLY: We've only got one planet!
So let's fight for our green future!
(Scratch whines)
-And for ice cream!
-Yes!
It's all I wanted.
MAN: Our Green Brighton Plan
has officially begun!
In ten years,
Brighton will be carbon-neutral.
Green jobs, bike lanes, our own
locally-manufactured wind turbines.
We couldn't do it alone,
but together, we're making a difference.
United as one, to save the--
(Scratch moaning)
Oh, yeah!
(gulps)
I love you so much, ice cream.
SCRATCH AND MOLLY:
The Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
(quirky music)
It's unanimous. Bizmart is forbidden
from building a megastore
in our beloved Brighton.
(cheering)
WOMAN: What a relief!
Okay. Apparently, nothing prevents them
from building a megastore
eight inches outside our beloved Brighton.
Oh, it's fine. Our customers are loyal.
Right. They won't abandon us
for some shiny new things.
WOMAN (over P.A.):
Attention Bizmart shoppers.
Fifty percent off shiny new things!
-(horns honking)
-Give me that shiny new thing!
Please shop Davenport's.
-Everything is 25% off! Please!
-(screaming)
I'm so sorry
Bizmart put Davenport's out of business.
Ugh! It's worse than that.
Without the store, my flawless future
is falling apart.
I was gonna spend the next 20 years
starting a skincare line,
a charity for dogs with dandruff,
a whole global lifestyle company!
Then, I'd marry Alina Webster.
Her parents own Webster's
department store in Mewline.
And she's like, really good
at market analysis.
We merge our stores, and become
the ultimate Midwest power couple!
Wow, you are really good at photo editing.
Thanks. Sometimes Patty pays me
to edit photos
so her legs look longer. I don't know why.
Who has short legs now, Linda?
-(sighs)
-Andrea, you can still do all that!
You're an influencer!
Until the "Fawndreas" find out
that Davenport's is closing,
then we'll have zero followers!
Well, followers aren't everything!
Why don't you take
a little social media break?
Okay, no! That did not land.
Pivoting to my next idea
Maybe all you need is a re-brand.
You're so much more than the store.
Maybe you're right.
If I can find a new brand,
I can save my influencer status,
and my flawless future!
Andrea's school chum, oh,
you'll buy something, won't you? Please.
MOLLY: So, long story short,
Andrea's having an identity crisis.
Ah, poor young, aimless Andrea.
You know, one of the many gifts that comes
with extended time on this earth
is knowin' exactly who you are. See?
-(rock playing)
-I've got this rock 'n' roll personality.
Whoa! Beep, beep, beep!
Let's back that up.
Say that last part again?
Uh, I effortlessly exude
a rock 'n' roll vibe?
Surely you've noticed.
Uh Yeah. Yeah? I mean, I guess?
-(phone ringing)
-Oh!
That's Andrea. Gotta go!
(blows raspberry)
The heck's Molly know
about rock 'n' roll anyway?
Pew, pew!
ANDREA: There we go, Fawndreas.
An easy, 337-step,
no-make-up-make-up look!
Make sure to follow, like, and subscribe.
'Cause I really need
your support. Love you, bye!
Andrea! That was great!
You've totally found your new brand!
(squeals)
Let's see if the Fawndreas are as obsessed
as you are!
Weird. No Davenport's content.
Wonder what's up with that.
That's just one comment.
Oh, see? This one says,
"Click here to adopt a ferret today."
Comments don't mean anything, right?
(awkward chuckle)
Right. Numbers are what count.
What? I lost three Fawndreas?
(gasps)
That's never happened before.
Your fan base just needs time to adjust.
Maybe it's fawn-base?
But I need to hit 10 million followers
by my Sweet 16!
It's the first of 22 milestones!
Fawn-base is cute, though,
and I will be using it.
-(rumbling)
-(both scream)
So then I just push it down? For a coffee?
Yup. Just plunge it, Pete.
-(distant buzzing)
-Is that a fly?
(buzzing continues)
Hello! Insert familial pleasantries,
et cetera, et cetera, blah, blah, blah.
Okay, now let's get onto me.
Just curious, how would you describe me?
-Hungry?
-Blue.
(stutters)
I mean, like,
what kind of personality do I have?
-Grumpy.
-Unpleasant?
-Stubborn?
-Oh. Stubborn. Yes. Stubborn.
-That's a good one.
-Okay. It feels a little like
you're purposefully misunderstanding me?
Okay, I'm gonna walk you right up to it.
Do I have a rock 'n' roll personality?
(laughing)
Oh, you're serious.
Scratch, rock 'n' roll is like
(imitates drum noise)
Yeah! Yeah!
And you're more like, "Wah, wah."
Whoa! Uh, Peter?
Do you happen to agree with this absolute
character assassination?
Um, how would you describe
a rock 'n' roll personality anyway?
Uh, yeah. You know
(electric guitar riffs)
(hoots)
Like-- like this.
Ah! Then no.
Wheel-n-peel out!
(buzzing)
You're trying too hard!
-Do I have a rock 'n' roll personality?
-Oh, cob, no!
But that's why I married you.
He-hey, Fawndreas. It's your girl, Andrea,
taste-testing strange snacks
we found in
Uh, in the Davenport's warehouse.
First step, dill pickle
and sardine-flavored chips.
(nervous chuckle)
Yay.
Oh.
(giggles)
Probably a pull tab or something on here.
You just need more force!
-How was that?
-Well, uh
You know, you seemed a bit
out of your comfort zone.
If it's what the Fawndreas want,
that's all that matters.
Ugh, I'm losing more followers.
See? Without Davenport's, I'm nothing.
Hey, I saw that candy dish first!
Maybe, but you're gonna have
a hard time catching me and my long legs!
Okay, okay, we can fix this.
I just need to rebrand
the rebrand of the rebrand.
SCRATCH: My personality
type is pretty obvious.
Hmm? Eh?
(lollipop stick clatters)
(melody playing)
Oh!
-(rock music playing)
-Eh?
Well, that sold me!
(chuckles)
You definitely have
a rock 'n' roll personality.
(snickers)
Yes! Thank you, Geoff.
-I knew you had good taste.
-(Jeff hums)
More like a soft rock personality.
(soft rock music playing)
A "soft rock" personality?
Are you kidding me?
(hissing)
I'm taking this
(muffled)
for emotional damages!
ANDREA: Okay, I scoured the Internet
for the top performing videos.
Ooh. Plumbing hacks?
Building tiny furniture?
Rehabilitating butterflies?
Uh, none of these ideas seem very
-Andrea?
-Well, who even is Andrea?
If I have to change my whole personality
to achieve my flawless future,
then that's what I'll do!
ANDREA: Uh ♪
Hit ♪
Uh ♪
She is clearly having
an identity crisis ♪
Rebrand, rebrand ♪
Identity crisis ♪
Who am I? ♪
Identity crisis ♪
-But you'll be okay ♪
-Okay ♪
Think who you are
and throw it far away ♪
-On it!
-Hey! Maybe you bake ♪
Yeah, go make a cake ♪
Baking is hard
Your cake's completely tarred ♪
Well, maybe you game ♪
Gaming is so awesome ♪
How many subscribers did I get?
-You lost some.
-What?
Identity crisis ♪
You know what to do ♪
Rebrand, rebrand ♪
Into a brand-new you ♪
Doing impressions of favorite cartoons ♪
Filling your house
with a thousand balloons ♪
Teaching 'em lessons
On how to play spoons ♪
Take a hashtag at the casserole ♪
The gymspirational, gettin' swole ♪
If you gonna live stream
your morning stroll ♪
Just watch out for that hole! ♪
Identity crisis ♪
Gotta get some tasty views ♪
Identity crisis ♪
Did you try to play the blues? ♪
(off-key tune)
Identity crisis ♪
Whatever you you choose ♪
Rebrand, rebrand ♪
Into a brand-new you ♪
(big sigh)
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah!
(mutters)
(shoes screeching)
What are you doing?
And why are you doing it?
Well, I thought Molly's
denim jacket might help others
see my rock 'n' roll personality, but
I think the embroidered unicorn
is kinda hurtin' the cause.
(neighing)
Scratch. You don't need
anyone's validation
to have a rock 'n' roll personality.
In fact, it's more
rock 'n' roll if you don't.
So, are you saying,
my opinion is the only one that matters?
And everyone else's are dumb
and should be ignored?
Sure. And Scratch?
You're slaying the fit.
(chuckles)
I'm gonna assume that's good?
MR. DAVENPORT (over P.A.):
That's it, folks.
Davenport's is closing.
For the last time.
All sales are final.
(sobbing)
Sorry, Molly, but I'm not feeling
this Cutie-pie rebrand at the moment.
That's fine, Andrea.
You know, most 13-year-olds
don't have their whole lives figured out.
I know. But I did, and now,
I don't know what I'm gonna do,
or who I'm supposed to be,
and my future is a hot mess.
Just like me.
Sorry, Alina. You'll have to find
another powerful businesswoman
to merge dynasties with.
(beeping)
(beeping continues)
(gasps)
Oh, no!
Oh, no. We were live that whole time.
Oh, no, I'm so sorry!
The empathy part of my brain
overpowered the "press the stop button"
part of my brain!
It doesn't matter anyway, Molly.
My brand is garbage.
Who'd wanna follow me?
These comments
No, Andrea! Don't read them!
It's not worth it!
(gasps)
Molly, look!
"Love this honesty."
"So real and vulnerable."
"A ferret can be yours
in less than three clicks!"
Okay. Well, that's a bot.
I'm I'm gonna block that one.
But everyone else is being really nice!
(gasps)
That's it!
Your new brand is you!
-Just being you!
-This means
my flawless future is still possible?
(squeals)
Thanks, Molly!
Follow me, Fawndreas,
for more completely unscripted,
totally authentic moments like this.
Ugh. Molly, I think maybe
you were right before.
I could use a little social media detox.
I'll take a week off and come back
bright and refreshed for my Fawndreas!
-How'd it go?
-You know, pretty good. Wha--
-Is that my jacket?
-I don't need your validation!
-I'm rock 'n' roll, baby! Whoo!
-(chuckles)
So taking my things
is "rock 'n' roll" now?
Yup. And I'm taking the pie, too.
SCRATCH AND MOLLY:
The Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
(closing theme music)