Dragons: Riders of Berk s02e17 Episode Script

- LET'S GO, BUD.
[Toothless roars.]
[heroic music.]
- YEAH.
- WOW.
- COOL.
- WOW.
- WOW, NICE.
- HE'S PRETTY GOOD.
[soft orchestration.]
- [gasps.]
TRADER JOHANN'S HERE! EVERYBODY, TRADER JOHANN'S HERE! - JOHANN, SHMOHANN.
THAT GUY NEVER LETS ME TOUCH ANY OF HIS COOL STUFF.
- WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE LAST TIME HE WAS HERE YOU BROKE HALF OF IT.
- [scoffs.]
IT'S MY WORD AGAINST HIS.
- AH, BERK! THE CROWN JEWEL OF THE ENTIRE ARCHIPELAGO.
- OVER HERE, TRADER JOHANN! - [laughs.]
WELL - OH! WHAT DID YOU BRING TODAY? - MANY WONDROUS THINGS, MR.
FISHLEGS.
TREASURES FROM EVERY COAST AND EVERY SHORE.
LIKE THE PEARLS OF DYNGJA.
- OH! - PERFECT FOR THAT SPECIAL LADY IN YOUR LIFE.
- YOU KNOW, THOSE COULD BE YOURS, ASTRID.
JUST SAY THE WORD.
- YUCK.
- THAT'S NOT THE WORD.
- MM, NOPE.
NOPE.
- AH, MR.
GOBBER.
WHAT CAN I INTEREST YOU IN? - WHY DON'T YOU WOW ME, JOHANN? KNOCK ME OFF MY FEET.
- PUT ME TO THE TEST, ARE YOU? OKAY.
[chuckles.]
- HANG ON.
WHAT'S UNDER HERE? - OH, NOTHING TOO EXCITING.
JUST AN OLD PILE OF-- - SCRAP METAL! PERFECT.
I'VE RUN OUT OF THINGS TO POUND AROUND HERE.
- WHOA.
IT'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I'VE EVER SEEN.
- IT'S JUST SCRAP METAL.
- NO.
I'M TALKING ABOUT THIS MACE.
[building orchestral music.]
WHOA.
HEY, MACE.
YOU WANNA COME HOME WITH ME, DON'T YOU? [falsetto voice.]
YES, I DO, TUFFNUT.
I WANT TO NEEDLESSLY DESTROY OTHER PEOPLE'S PROPERTY WITH YOU.
[normal voice.]
OH, MACEY.
YOU GET ME.
- I SEE YOU ARE A GENTLEMAN THAT RECOGNIZES QUALITY WHEN HE SEES IT.
THIS IS THE FINEST METAL FROM THE FURTHEST REACHES OF THE ARCHIPELAGO.
- [grunts.]
AH.
I'LL TAKE IT ALL.
- EXCELLENT! ALWAYS A PLEASURE, MR.
GOBBER.
[Toothless sniffing.]
[crashing.]
- OH! - WASN'T ME.
- OH, I REALLY HATE THAT KID.
- [grunting.]
HICCUP, YOU THINK YOU COULD SPARE A HOOK, SON? - NOT A PROBLEM, GOBBER.
HEY, GUYS.
- LET'S DO THIS, MACEY.
- NOT SO FAST, YOU.
I PAID GOOD MONEY FOR THIS SCRAP.
I'LL NOT HAVE YOU DROPPING IT INTO THE OCEAN.
[Toothless growls.]
[ominous music.]
[dragon screeches.]
- [yawns.]
- I HAD THOSE LADLES WHEN I WENT TO SLEEP, AND NOW THEY'RE GONE.
- OH, MY GRANDMOTHER'S GOBLETS, GONE! - OKAY, WHAT DID WE JUST WALK INTO? - MY FAVORITE MILK JUGS, GONE.
- WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? - A BUNCH OF STUFF GOT STOLEN FROM THE VILLAGE LAST NIGHT.
- AND SOME OF US ARE TAKING IT PRETTY HARD.
- OH! MACEY! MACEY! OH, GAH! [sobbing.]
OH, GOLLY, SHE'S GONE! NO! OH.
YOU.
YOU WERE ALWAYS JEALOUS OF HER.
YOU KNEW THAT I LOVED HER MORE, BECAUSE I TOLD YOU EVERY SO OFTEN AND I WROTE IT IN YOUR ROOM ON THE WALL! - WE HAVE QUITE A SITUATION ON OUR HANDS.
AXES, SHIELDS, HELMETS, DRINKING GOBLETS, ALL STOLEN.
- AXES, SHIELDS, HELMETS, DRINKING GOBLETS WHAT DO ALL THOSE THINGS HAVE IN COMMON? - OBVIOUSLY, DUH, THEY'RE ALL GONE.
- NO, THEY'RE METAL.
EVERYTHING THAT'S MISSING IS METAL.
- HICCUP, EVERYTHING WE OWN IS METAL.
- IT'S A THEORY.
WORK WITH ME.
- MISS THE LITTLE SPIKES AROUND YOUR HEAD THE MOST--[sobbing.]
- WHATEVER'S GOING ON, I NEED TO FIND WHOEVER IS RESPONSIBLE BEFORE THIS PANIC GETS ANY WORSE.
- STOICK, BUCKET AND MULCH ARE SLAPPING EACH OTHER WITH STURGEONS.
[both grunting.]
- WHAT HAPPENED TO THEIR BLUDGEONS? - STOLEN.
HENCE THE STURGEON.
- IN SOME WAYS, I GUESS THAT'S PROBABLY BETTER.
- UH, DAD, WHAT DO YOU SAY YOU TAKE CARE OF THE STURGEON SLAPPING WHILE ASTRID AND I DO A LITTLE INVESTIGATING? - INVESTIGATING? WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU PLANNING, HICCUP? - TO RETURN TO THE SCENES OF THE CRIMES AND SEE IF WE CAN FIND OUT SOMETHING ABOUT THIS METAL THIEF.
- I MISS HER! [sobbing.]
SHE HAD SUCH A WEIRD VOICE.
- GOBBER, CAN YOU REMEMBER WHO'S BEEN HERE IN THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS? - MM, HARD TO SAY.
BUSINESS HAS BEEN BOOMING.
THERE'S ONLY 41 SHOPPING DAYS LEFT UNTIL SNOGGLETOG, YOU KNOW.
DON'T WAIT UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE.
- HMM.
HMM.
NO FOOTPRINTS.
- THIS METAL THIEF WON'T GET THE BEST OF ME.
I'VE SET A BOOBY TRAP THAT'S GUARANTEED TO NAB HIM.
[whooshing, thumps.]
- WHAT'S THE MATTER? - UH IT WOULD APPEAR THAT I'VE TRAPPED MYSELF IN MY OWN BOOBY.
NO ONE MOVE A MUSCLE.
- THIS IS WHERE MACEY WAS BEFORE HER DISAPPEARANCE.
QUOTE, UNQUOTE.
- I DIDN'T TAKE YOUR STUPID MACE.
- IT WAS HER FAVORITE SPOT.
SHE JUST LOVED WATCHING THE SUNSETS.
OR THIS WALL, JUST DEPENDING ON WHICH SIDE I LEFT HER ON.
[sighs.]
SUNSETS.
- THIS IS WEIRD.
- YEAH, EVEN FOR THE TWINS.
- HEY, LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS ONE.
- STRANGE.
NO FORCED ENTRY.
NOT A SINGLE FOOTPRINT.
- AND NO EYEWITNESSES.
- I JUST DON'T GET IT.
- I DO.
IT'S SO OBVIOUS.
AND YOU CALL YOURSELVES DETECTIVES.
- UH, FIRST OF ALL, NO, WE DON'T CALL OURSELVES DETECTIVES.
AND SECOND, WHAT'S SO OBVIOUS? - WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR IS NOT JUST A METAL THIEF, IT'S A GHOST METAL THIEF.
UH-HUH.
- WELL, THAT WAS HELPFUL, AS USUAL.
- IT'S GETTING LATE.
WE'LL START AGAIN IN THE MORNING.
- [snoring.]
- AAH! [clatters.]
OH! WHAT THE-- TOOTHLESS! TOOTHLESS! - TOOTHLESS! [dragons growling.]
SMOTHERING SMOKEBREATHS.
HEY! NO! GET YOUR HANDS OFF THAT! WELL, BUD, IT LOOKS LIKE WE FOUND OUR THIEF.
[villagers chattering.]
- [sighs.]
THE THIEF HIT YOU GUYS TOO, HUH? - I FEEL NAKED WITHOUT MY HELMET.
- ME TOO.
BUT I MADE A SKETCH OF THE THIEF.
IT CAME TO ME IN A DREAM.
YOU SEE, MY SUBCONSCIOUS IS WORKING OVERTIME, LIKE A SPORTS TEAM THAT JUST CAN'T WIN.
- UM, TUFFNUT, THAT'S YOU.
- NO, IT'S NOT.
- UH, YES, IT IS.
- NO, IT ISN'T, I THINK I WOULD KNOW MYSELF IF I-- HUH.
I GUESS IT IS.
YEAH.
- HEY, GUYS.
I KNOW WHO THE THIEF IS.
OR SHOULD I SAY I KNOW WHO OUR THIEVES ARE? ADOLESCENT SMOKEBREATH DRAGONS.
- OF COURSE! SMOKEBREATHS STEAL METAL TO BUILD THEIR NESTS.
- BUT WHY WOULD SMOKEBREATHS BE ON BERK? - CHIEF! COMING IN FOR THE BIG WIN! SMOTHERING SMOKEBREATHS NORMALLY DON'T STRAY FAR FROM THEIR HOME ON BREAKNECK BOG.
- THAT'S THE PART I'M STILL UNCLEAR ABOUT.
- I'VE BEEN ROBBED! THE THIEF EVADED MY BOOBY TRAPS AND TOOK ALL THE METAL I BOUGHT FROM TRADER JOHANN! LEFT ME WITH NARY A SCRAP OF SCRAP! - DAD, I THINK I MIGHT KNOW HOW THE SMOKEBREATHS GOT HERE.
- THAT'S WHEN I SAID-- [sniffs.]
"WHAT'S FOR DINNER?" AND THE CHIEF OF THE MORI ORI TRIBE LICKED HIS LIPS AND SAID, "YOU ARE!" [laughing.]
YOU ARE! MY FIRST MATE WOULD'VE BEEN HIS FIRST COURSE.
HA! AH, MASTER HICCUP AND THE GREAT CHIEF.
TO WHAT DO I OWE THIS PLEASURE? - WELL, JOHANN, WE WERE WONDERING WHERE YOU MAY HAVE GOTTEN THAT SCRAP METAL YOU SOLD GOBBER.
- UNFORTUNATELY, OLD FRIENDS, I CAN'T POSSIBLY REVEAL MY SOURCES.
- [growls.]
- OF COURSE, THERE ARE TIMES WHEN IT'S BEST TO SHARE.
I PROCURED IT FROM A BERSERKER, WHO WAS OFFERING IT AT A PRICE I COULD NOT REFUSE.
HE HAD JUST COME FROM AN ISLAND THAT WE BOTH WELL AND EQUALLY FEAR.
- BREAKNECK BOG.
- YOU DIDN'T HEAR THAT FROM ME.
- OH, WELL, THAT WASN'T JUST A PILE OF SCRAP METAL, JOHANN, THAT WAS A SMOKEBREATH NEST WITH HATCHLINGS INSIDE IT.
- WELL, UH, WELL, THAT'S UNFORTUNATE NEWS.
- [sighs.]
[Toothless growls.]
- AH, OOH.
[gasps.]
NO NEED TO THANK ME! NOW, BACK TO OUR STORY.
WHERE WAS I? AH, YES, THE FIRST COURSE.
- WELL, THAT ANSWERS HOW THE SMOKEBREATHS GOT HERE.
[villagers chattering.]
[wood creaks.]
- [mutters.]
- OH! - GOBBER, WHAT'S THE LATEST? - JUST AS I'D FEARED, STOICK.
ALMOST NO METAL LEFT IN ALL OF BERK.
- AND WHAT OF THE ARMORY? - LET'S JUST SAY THE AXE HANDLES OUTNUMBER THE AXES.
- [growls.]
- OH.
AND THEN THERE'S THIS.
[taps.]
[crash.]
- WITHOUT WEAPONS, BERK IS VULNERABLE.
- DAD, WE'VE STILL GOT THE DRAGONS.
- AND DAGUR HAS AN ARMADA.
FIVE DRAGONS ARE NO MATCH FOR A LARGE-SCALE ATTACK.
- WE HAVE TO FIND THAT MISSING METAL.
ESPECIALLY THE WEAPONS.
- OH, MACEY MUST BE SO ALONE AND SCARED OUT THERE.
IT'S HARD OUT THERE FOR A MACE.
OH, MACEY.
- MAYBE THE SMOKEBREATHS TOOK THE METAL BACK TO BREAKNECK BOG.
- I DON'T THINK SO.
SMOKEBREATHS CAN'T FLY LONG DISTANCES CARRYING A LOT OF WEIGHT.
- HEY, SNOTLOUT, HOW'D YOU GET YOUR HELMET BACK? - [chuckles.]
IT'S MY SPARE.
A REAL WARRIOR IS NEVER WITHOUT HIS HELMET.
- [scoffs.]
CAN'T SAY THE SAME FOR HIS BRAIN.
- WHAT IS IT WITH YOU TODAY? YOU ARE SO UP MY-- AAH! OOH! HEY! - SNOTLOUT, COME ON, PLEASE FOCUS.
- COME ON, REALLY? OH! - IF THE SMOKEBREATHS DIDN'T TAKE THE METAL BACK TO BREAKNECK BOG, THEY MUST HAVE STARTED BUILDING A NEST SOMEWHERE HERE ON BERK.
- AWESOME! NOT AWESOME? - DEFINITELY NOT AWESOME.
HOW ARE WE GONNA FIND THEM? THEY COULD BE ANYWHERE.
- WELL, THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO CATCH A METAL THIEF, AND THAT'S-- - WAIT, DON'T TELL ME.
WITH A NET.
NO.
NO, NO, WITH A ROPE.
NO? OKAY.
OH--OH! DON'T SAY IT.
WITH A ROPEY NET.
- I WAS JUST GONNA SAY WITH METAL.
- OH! IT WAS ON THE TIP OF MY TONGUE.
STUPID TONGUE.
FLICK IT.
COME ON, FLICK IT.
OW! OH, YEAH.
- SO WE NEED TO GATHER ALL THE METAL FROM THE ARENA AND BAIT A TRAP THAT THE SMOKEBREATHS WON'T BE ABLE TO RESIST.
WE LURE THEM IN, LET THEM TAKE THE METAL, AND FOLLOW THEM RIGHT BACK TO THE NEST AND ALL OUR MISSING WEAPONS.
- YOU DID SAY "ALL THE METAL," RIGHT, HICCUP? - [whistling.]
WHAT? OH, YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME.
WHAT ABOUT HIS LEG? THAT'S MADE OF METAL.
- SNOTLOUT.
- ALL I'M SAYING IS FAIR IS FAIR.
- SNOTLOUT, PLEASE.
- I STILL THINK WE SHOULD'VE FLIPPED A YAK PIE FOR IT.
- SHH.
IT LOOKS LIKE THEY'VE TAKEN THE BAIT.
OKAY, VERY IMPORTANT.
NO ONE DO ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING UNTIL I GIVE THE SIGNAL.
both: GET 'EM! - YET ANOTHER PLAN PERFECTLY EXECUTED.
DRAGONS, EVERYONE! - I GOT ONE! - I GOT ONE TOO! - UGH, AND ITS SKIN FEELS ALL SWEATY AND CLAMMY.
LIKE A GIRL.
- HEY! - LOOK, THERE THEY GO.
FOLLOW THEM! OKAY, DON'T LOSE 'EM, BUD.
OKAY, TRICKY.
EVERYONE SPLIT UP! SNEAKY.
TOOTHLESS, OVER THERE! OH, NOT THIS AGAIN.
[grunts.]
FOLLOW THAT ROD! [panting.]
GET ME CLOSE ENOUGH, TOOTHLESS.
WANT SOME METAL? HERE YA GO! WHOA! WHOA! MAYBE THIS WAS A BAD IDEA.
[Toothless growls.]
WHAT IS IT, BUD? GIVE US SOME LIGHT, BUD.
THE SMOKEBREATHS' NEST.
UH, WE NEED TO GO BACK AND GET ALL THE RIDERS, SO WE CAN BREAK THIS APART AND GET IT BACK TO THE VILLAGE.
- HICCUP! THANK THOR.
I FINALLY CAUGHT UP TO YOU.
- ASTRID, I FOUND THE SMOKEBREATH NEST AND-- - WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THAT NOW.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN? - WE JUST SPOTTED SOMETHING ON THE HORIZON.
SOMETHING THAT MAY BE A BIGGER PROBLEM THAN THE SMOKEBREATHS.
- WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT THOSE PESKY, LITTLE SCAVENGERS COULD BRING BERK TO ITS KNEES? - ACTUALLY, I DID.
IF YOU RECALL, IT WAS MY IDEA.
ALTHOUGH NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT, I PROBABLY STOLE IT FROM YOU.
- WITH NO WEAPONS AND JUST A HANDFUL OF DRAGONS, BERK WILL BE NO MATCH FOR THE MIGHT OF DAGUR AND HIS BERSERKER ARMADA! [cracks neck.]
PUCKER UP, HICCUP.
BECAUSE YOU'RE ABOUT TO KISS MY BOOTS.
[smooches.]
- WHAT'S THIS GUY, LIKE, THE KING OF ARMADAS? DOES HE GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT ONE? - IT'S LIKE HE KNEW WE WERE GONNA BE DEFENSELESS.
- HE DID.
TRADER JOHANN SAID HE BOUGHT THE SCRAP METAL FROM A BERSERKER.
- AND IT WAS FROM BREAKNECK BOG.
- DAGUR PLANTED THOSE DRAGONS.
HE KNEW WHAT THEY WOULD DO.
- HICCUP, YOU FOUND THE SMOKEBREATH NEST.
YOU AND THE OTHER RIDERS GO TO IT AND GET OUR WEAPONS.
- THEY'LL BE PROTECTING IT BY NOW.
WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO FIGHT THE SMOKEBREATHS AND GET BACK HERE BEFORE DAGUR ATTACKS.
- THEN I SAY WE HEAD OUT THERE AND BLAST THOSE BERSERKERS WITH WHAT WE'VE GOT.
- EVEN WITH OUR DRAGONS, THE SIX OF US WON'T BE ABLE TO TAKE OUT THOSE SHIPS ALONE.
- WELL, IF WE CUT OURSELVES IN HALF, WE'D BE TWICE AS MANY! - JUST ONCE, TRY STOPPING IT BETWEEN HERE AND HERE.
- NO, HE'S ACTUALLY ONTO SOMETHING.
- SEE? I'LL GET AN AXE.
- WHAT? NO.
YOU DON'T NEED AN AXE.
WE DON'T NEED MORE OF US.
WE NEED MORE DRAGONS.
- WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, SON? - WHY FIGHT AGAINST THE SMOKEBREATHS WHEN WE CAN FIGHT WITH THEM? EVERYONE, BRING ANY METAL YOU MIGHT STILL HAVE IN YOUR HOUSES.
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW SMALL IT IS.
- YOU HEARD MY SON! - I GUTTED MY FIRST OUTCAST WITH THIS.
TAKE GOOD CARE OF IT.
- THANK YOU, GOBBER.
I WILL.
[metal rattling.]
[dragon growls.]
- RUFF, TUFF, SOUND THE DINNER BELL.
- COME AND GET IT, SMOKEBUTTS! - YEAH, SMOKEBUTTS, COME AND GET IT, YOU FOGGY BOTTOMS.
- OKAY, THERE THEY ARE.
WE NEED TO PICK UP THE PACE.
IF THEY GET THIS METAL, WE'RE DONE.
- OH, COME ON ALREADY! THERE SHOULD BE BOOT KISSING BY NOW! - [smooching.]
- NOT YOU.
[clatter.]
THAT'S DISGUSTING.
- JUST TRYING TO BE HELPFUL, SIR.
- [laughs.]
IT'S TIME.
- BERSERKERS, PREPARE TO FIRE! - [laughs.]
- ARM YOURSELF WITH WHATEVER YOU CAN FIND.
WE WILL BATTLE TO THE END.
- STOICK, LOOK.
- DAGUR'S FLEET UP AHEAD! - WHAT IS THAT? - IT LOOKS LIKE FOG.
- SIR, WE CAN NO LONGER SEE THE BERK MAINLAND.
WE HAVE NO TARGET.
- WHAT? - OKAY, GANG! METAL AWAY! - A SPOON? THEY'RE DROPPING SPOONS? WHY ARE THEY DROPPING SPOONS? WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? COULD THIS BE A SPOON OF SURRENDER? [dragon chirps.]
- DON'T THINK SO, SIR.
- OH, NO.
[gasps.]
- [gasps.]
[screams.]
- AAH! [whimpering.]
- WHAT IS THIS? WHAT'S THIS-- WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? [shouting.]
- HICCUP, I THOUGHT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO-- - WAIT FOR IT.
[ships creaking.]
[both scream.]
[men screaming.]
- THIS IS NOT OVER, HICCUP! YOU HEAR ME? YOU JUST WAIT! YOU WILL KISS THIS BOOT! [dragon chirps.]
YOU WILL KISS THIS BOOT.
- OH, MACEY, LET'S NEVER BE APART AGAIN.
LIFE IS AN EMPTY VOID WITHOUT YOUR SPIKY FACE.
[falsetto voice.]
OH, I MISSED YOU TOO, TUFFNUT.
[normal voice.]
AND I MISS THE SUNSETS WITH YOU, MACEY.
OH, THE SUNSETS.
- [laughs.]
WELL DONE, SON.
- WE'LL RETURN EVERYONE'S METAL JUST AS SOON AS WE GET THE SMOKEBREATHS BACK TO BREAKNECK BOG.
- AND HOW DO YOU PLAN ON DOING THAT? - OH, I THINK I KNOW SOMEONE WHO SHOULD BE HAPPY TO HELP US.
- BUT, MASTER HICCUP, THIS CAN'T BE THE ONLY SOLUTION! - THINK OF THE STORY YOU'LL HAVE TO TELL.
NEXT STOP, BREAKNECK BOG! - GIVE THAT BACK, YOU INFERNAL BEAST! THAT'S A PRICELESS ANDORRAN FUNERARY URN! OH, NO! MASTER HICCUP!