Lab Rats (2012) s02e18 Episode Script

1 Hey, could I use this? I need a place to store my toenail clippings.
You save your toenails? Of course.
They're nature's toothpicks.
You don't even want to know what he flosses with.
You really don't.
Hey, get away from that.
It's not empty! There are thousands of metallic nanobots in there! Well, then, why can't I see them? Because they're microscopically small.
But you're microscopically small and I can still see you! Nanobots are so tiny, they're invisible to the human eye.
Here, I'll show you.
Put these on.
Whoa! They function like mini-doctors inside the human body.
When patients swallow them, they'll seek and destroy any diseased cells or foreign matter.
Ooh.
I got a tennis ball and a mini statue of Liberty somewhere in my gut.
It's time to swallow a search party.
No! Those are valuable.
Come on, Leo, we don't want to step on broken glass.
What broken glass? Gimme! Right.
Oh ho ho, man! Those little guys sure run fast! If we lose these, Mr.
Davenport will kill us.
Great! Once again, I have to clean up your mess.
Just don't step on them.
Hey, dude, I got this.
I'll just grab a paper towel and pick 'em up.
Adam! Yeah, you're right.
Better get the vacuum instead.
Stop! I hear ya.
Better grab the mop.
The world's first bionic super-humans.
They're stronger than us, faster, smarter.
The next generation of the human race is Living in my basement? lab rats lab rats Lab rats lab rats Lab rats Why is Dewey the dingo standing in the middle of the hallway? I don't know, but I think it means we get six more weeks of winter.
Ladies and gentlemen, introducing the principal, a four-foot-eleven spitfire from Portland, Maine, Terri Perry! Just thought I'd spice up the morning announcements.
Takes me back to my days of playing semipro ball in Romania.
Here ya go, kid.
Souvenir.
I'm sure you're all wondering why Dewey the dingo is here.
Every year before the big homecoming game against the deerfield high leapin' llamas, some punk manages to steal Dewey.
No matter where I put it, they always find a way to get it.
Maybe you should try wearing it.
That'll keep people away.
Do you really want to go there, Suzy skinny jeans? Anywho, to make certain they don't take him this year, I'm assigning round-the-clock shifts.
Right.
I'm gonna go hit the hot tub.
Heard a couple of things pop when I ran out here.
( Scoffs ) Two-man shifts, and she paired me with you.
Mmm.
Great.
So we got one man.
Who's the other one? What's going on in here? Domino domination? I don't know anything about dominos, but if it means gym class is canceled, I'm all for it.
Oh, hey, Caitlin.
Are you doing the domino domination? "Doing"? No.
Annihilating every competitor that comes my way? Yes! You may not know this, but I come from four generations of domino-droppers.
And that's something you're proud of? I got stuck with second place last year.
If it happens again, I'll have to shave my head, move to the desert, and hope the coyotes will accept me as one of their own.
That's something a stable person would say.
So, how do these competitions work? You get points for number of dominos toppled and originality.
My designs are super original 'cause, well, there's only one me! Amen to that! Do you guys want to do it with me? My teammates just bailed.
They couldn't handle the pressure.
( Laughingly ) The pressure of dominos? Ha ha ha! Sorry.
I just wish I didn't have to set it all up by myself.
Well, hey, we'll help you.
That sounds fun.
Uh, no it does not.
And who is "we"? Okay, come on, Leo, what else do you have going on today? Anything.
I have anything else going on.
Fine.
I'll do it.
Great.
On one condition.
I get to be the one who knocks over the first domino.
You can't be the tipper! The tipper gets all the glory.
I'm always the tipper! Well, give my best to the coyotes.
Fine! You can be the tipper! It will be team Leo.
I will break you in half.
Team Caitlin it is.
This is a waste of time.
I could be doing my homework! I know, and I could be standing in front of a mirror, squishing my face to see how I'll look when I'm old.
Ooh! This is a week before my 53rd birthday.
I'm going to the bathroom.
Watch the dingo.
Well, hurry back or you won't get to see my birthday present.
Facelift! Excuse me.
Uh, I'm new here.
Is there a trick to the vending machine? My trail mix got stuck.
Ah.
Trail mix.
Good call.
It's in season.
I'm Adam.
Griffin.
Well, Griffin, I find the earthquake method works best.
See, it starts with a rumble, then a big shake Then a pause, then an aftershock And bam! 8.
0 on the delicious scale.
Adam, what happened to the dingo? I don't know.
I was helping the new kid, Griffin, with the vending machine.
What? There is no new kid named Griffin.
He lied to you! He must have been from deerfield.
He stole the dingo! He lied to me? Well, that doesn't sound like Griffin at all! Great.
Now I have to go get the dingo back before Perry finds out.
Once again, I have to clean up your mess.
Wait, no.
I'll sneak into deerfield and get it back.
My friend Griffin goes there.
He can help me out.
You guys are doing a great job.
Just one quick question Are you trying to ruin my life? To be honest, your life was kind of a mess before we got here.
( Mocking laughter ) I specifically told you the spaces must be half an inch to two-thirds apart.
More than that, and the topple is gone.
We'll have no topple! Okay.
Caitlin, I know this is only the 83rd time you've made us start over, but we've been working for hours.
How 'bout a break? Winners don't take breaks, Bree! Ugh! Uh, we're in a domino competition.
I'm pretty sure no one here is a winner.
That's it! Take a lap, Leo.
This might be the first time I actually enjoy running.
Isn't this the best time ever? If I say no, can I take a lap too? Heh heh heh heh.
Go llamas! Ca-ca! Ca-ca! Adam, have you found the dingo yet? No.
I've checked everywhere but the locker room.
It's got to be in here somewhere.
Okay, but be discreet.
Right.
That's on me for thinking you know what "discreet" means! ( Gasps ) Dewey! Shh! Someone's coming! Whew, that was close.
D'oh! Mnh-mnh, mnh-mnh! Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Oop! No! Naaaagghhh! Just tell me where it goes! Wow! I just want to say that I am really impressed by the way that you've all worked so hard to meticulously craft such beautiful works of art.
Starting check! Starting check! ( Laughing ) Well, my work here is done.
Happy building, domi-nobodies.
Caitlin, I am starving.
Can we please stop for a snack? Oh, sure, Leo.
Let me tell you tonight's special.
We have a lovely Chilean sea bass with a delicious side of get back to work! She is impossible.
I can't do this anymore.
I'm quitting.
We can't quit now.
I'm a tip-top tipper, and I need to tip.
Then why don't we form our own team? You come up with a design, and I'll set it up with my super speed.
And ya still get to tip.
Okay, I'll do it.
But you have to tell señorita straitjacket.
Deal.
Caitlin, we need to talk.
Okay, as long as it's not about food or a break or me treating you like humans.
Look, this isn't working out, so Leo and I are forming our own team.
What? But! ( Comical nonsense sounds ) Okay.
I respect your decision.
May the best man win.
Are you trying to break my hand? No.
Is it working? ( Gasps ) Don't be scared.
It's not a real dingo.
It's me, your brother Adam, in a dingo costume.
Great, you got it back, but why are you wearing it? Chase, you can't have a dingo costume and not put it on.
It's an unwritten rule, sort of like how you don't have to wash your legs or feet because the shower water trickles down.
Principal Perry: Yeah, okay, bye! Perry's coming! I just got off the phone with the principal over at deerfield.
He said that someone stole their llama.
I hope none of you were dumb enough to do that because it would be illegal, and I can't have Johnny law breathing down my neck again! Again? Let's just say I'm on a lot of lists.
Adam, please tell me you did not bring their llama here.
Of course not.
I brought it here.
I can't believe you stole a llama and brought it here.
Well, I couldn't bring it to school, it's the first place they'd look.
Plus, I wanted to show it the house.
The poor guy's stuck outdoors all day.
What were you thinking? I wanted to teach those deerfield jerks that if they steal from us, there are consequences.
So you taught them a lesson about stealing by stealing? I see your point.
I stole their idea.
Uh! Gross! Ah.
Yep, he's a licker, like me.
Oh, no.
It's our turn to watch the dingo.
Principal Perry thought we did such a good job, she rewarded us by giving us another shift! Ah.
She's always thinking of us.
What a giver.
What am I gonna do? I can't deal with the llama and go watch the dingo.
Hey, no worries.
I'll watch the llama.
I want to see what he looks like in socks.
No, no way, because it always starts out with socks, and then it ends up with a llama in ski pants on a trampoline, and no one wants to see that.
Everybody wants to see that.
All the same, we're not doing it.
Go take care of the dingo, and I'll fix this.
Fine.
Just let me say goodbye to Lorenzo llama.
Who's a good boy? You're a good boy.
Mwah.
Mmm.
Tastes like chicken.
Go! The nanobots! Bad llama! Bad llama! Okay, if you and I are gonna be spending any kind of time together, you're gonna need a mint.
Is it ready? Yeah.
Here's the design.
Better hurry.
Dinner break's almost over.
Got it.
Whoa.
Five thousand dominos in three seconds.
Domin holla'! Domi-no-you-didn't.
( Gasps ) I'm a pretty Princess and people love me.
I'm a pretty Princess and people love me.
Hey, Caitlin.
I was gone for a half hour.
How did you set all these up? It's amazing how much you can accomplish when you're not out of your mind.
I'm gonna lose.
Oui, madame.
I'm finished.
Fini.
My life is over.
I only took one year of French.
Let's keep it simple.
How's it going? What's up, man? ( Gasps ) I can't do that! You naughty dingo, you! Adam, we got a big problem! We? It's not my fault your haircut makes you look like a lady golfer.
What? No! The llama ate all of the nanobots.
Their biology's different.
There's no telling how it'll react.
Why was the deerfield llama outside straddling my hatchback? He's full of highly unstable nanobots, and you brought him here? Bet you wish we stuck to ski pants now.
It's okay.
I speak llama.
When he spits, it just means he likes me.
Fyi, if I spit on you, it does not mean I like you.
Oh whoa! He's gettin' frisky.
Better grab my lasso.
Worked a couple of rodeos during college.
Nobody could stay on me for more than three seconds.
Adam, we have to do something.
Hey, Lorenzo ate the nanobots on your watch.
This is your problem.
All right.
Anybody who doesn't want to end up facedown and hogtied, out of my way! Yeehaw! Get over here! Come on! I got ya! Ohh! We got a fighter! Ah! ( Audibly struggling ) Quit fighting! He fought hard, but once I got his head in a leg lock, it was pretty much over.
Keep an eye on him, boys.
He'll miss me.
They always do.
Do you know how expensive those nanobots are? We gotta get them out.
Well, how do you do it on humans? You're supposed to extract them individually, but with this many, it could take days! ( Trilling sound ) Oh, no.
Oh, no, a bunch of them are gathering in the salivary glands.
They're preparing to activate.
What does that mean? It means that the next time he spits It'll leave a Mark.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's tippin' time.
Adam: Incoming! No! ( Applause ) ( Screams and shouting ) Adam, we have to do something.
Hurry, help me think.
Wow.
That's something I never thought I'd say.
What do you want me to do? It's not like I can just pull an idea out of my head with a giant idea magnet.
( Girl screams ) Magnet! Yes! The nanobots are metallic.
We can use a magnet to pull them out of the llama.
Adam, you are a geni That was a good idea.
( Low tone ) Okay, hold up the magnet.
I'll guide you.
( Whirring sound ) Okay, they're gathering in the femur.
Got it.
And a femur would be a? Leg.
Move it up.
Okay, but I don't see how this is helping.
No, Adam, the llama leg.
Now, bank left.
No, left.
Left! My left or llama left? The opposite of what you're doing left! You're getting closer.
Closer.
Now move up.
Pull up! Pull up! ( Llama belches ) Nice! Adam, thank you.
You totally bailed me out.
Good news! Deerfield just wants their llama back, no questions asked.
Muscles, lady-locks, get on it.
He won't budge.
I think there's something wrong with him.
Oh, no.
Maybe we didn't get all the nanobots out.
Quit stalling! There's nothing wrong with Does that mean he likes you? Congratulations, guys.
I was a jerk.
You totally deserved to win.
Hey, second place is nothing to sneeze at.
Yeah, but it's not as good as first.
No, Leo's right.
I deserved to lose.
Actually, Caitlin, we have a confession to make.
No we don't! ( Sighs ) Leo and I cheated.
I knew it! I knew it! Cheaters! They cheated! Hey, hey! Pretty Princess, pretty Princess! Look, we're really sorry.
Is there anything we can do to make it up to you? Well nationals are next month.
They're in Omaha, so my mom will have to drive us.
Her car's a 2-seater, but I'm sure you can fit four if we all snuggle real tight.
You'll like my mom.
She's a lot like me But way more intense! Hey! Get back here! I know where you live! Lab rats lab rats Lab rats lab rats