Twin Peaks s02e18 Episode Script

Do you like that? Oh, Harry.
Josie.
Yes.
Yes, it's me.
I'm here.
- Josie.
- Harry, I'm here.
Josie Room service.
Come on in, it's open.
You can just put it on the table.
Audrey.
I trust your sleep was untroubled? Here at The Great Northern, we aim to make your stay as comfortable and as enjoyable as possible.
You know, we take the concept of room service very seriously.
Do you remember your grandfather? Colorful man, one of the wisest I ever met.
You know what he once said? He said if you're gonna bring a hammer, you better bring nails.
What's that supposed to mean? What that means is the next time you come into my room and carry on, you'd better be ready to finish whatever it is you came here to start.
- Maybe I'm ready now.
- Then be yourself.
I am being myself.
You're right.
You're absolutely right.
I stand corrected, you're a beautiful, intelligent young woman.
What else? You have an undeniable magic about you that inspires a plan.
Flight at sunset and dinner for two? - When? - What, the flight or the sunset? Well, I have to go to the library and have a meeting with my father later.
A simple yes or no would do.
Yes.
And if you bring a hammer, you better bring some nails too.
Anything? No, not a word.
She wants to speak to the South African consulate.
In Twin Peaks? Why would Eckhardt want me dead? Sexual jealousy.
Oh, yeah.
It's good to have you back, Harry.
Taken me a day or so to get my sea legs.
Well, to be honest, it looks like you went down with the ship.
Why don't you go home and recuperate? No, all I need is some coffee, maybe a little food.
Sure-fire cure for a hangover, Harry.
You take a glass of nearly frozen, unstrained tomato juice.
You plop a couple of oysters in there, you drink it down.
Breathe deeply.
Next, you take a mound, and I mean a mound, of sweetbreads, sauté them with some chestnuts and some Canadian bacon.
Finally, biscuits.
Big biscuits, smothered in gravy.
Now, here's where it gets tricky, you're gonna need some anchovies-- Excuse me.
That should do it.
The bonsai.
The ultimate miniature.
Bicarbonate of soda, the ultimate digestive aid.
Harry, quaff in good health.
Thank you.
Where the hell did that come from? It was delivered this morning.
It's from Josie.
Harry, Windom Earle was at my house.
Windom Earle.
When? Yesterday.
He left this with Donna.
He's closing in, Harry.
Knight to king bishop 3.
What do we do? We publish our next move today.
Thanks, Lucy.
Brace yourself, Harry.
- Agent Dale Cooper.
- Gordon Cole.
Sure sorry to interrupt you fellas.
But, Coop, I'm bringing you the classified portion of the Windom Earle dossier.
Back from Bend? Been on over to Bend, Oregon.
Whole lot of shaking going on down in Bend.
Enter Gordon Cole.
This is so galling, Leo.
Young Dale is continually refusing to play fair! When Earle went: The doctors discovered he was on haloperidol.
The same drug the one-armed man, Gerard, was on.
- What's that? - Gerard used the same drug.
You got it.
But they figured he was using the drug to fake his illness just as you suspected, Coop.
Definite schizoid maneuvering.
"Project Blue Book?" My God, Gordon, what was he doing on this? The Bureau loaned Earle out to the Air Force in 1965.
Reports on his two-year hitch are blacked out.
National security.
Wait a minute.
Earle was investigating UFOs? Major Briggs, Harry.
Gordon, there are some curious linkages here.
The word linkage reminds me of sausage.
Never cared much for the links, preferred the patties.
But breakfast is a real good idea.
Bonsai.
Remember those old World War II movies? Bonsai! Damnation! Good to see you again, doc.
Sheriff, we'll be riding with you.
Cruiser's right outside.
Hold it one second there, Coop.
You'd better dust off your own black suit.
With Windom Earle rolling around loose on the deck, we need you back on the team.
What are you saying, Gordon? Coop, it gives me great pleasure to reinstate you into the Federal Bureau of Investigation.
Brand-new issue, more accurate and efficient.
Smith & Wesson, ten millimeter.
Model 1076, all stainless steel.
It's a beautiful weapon, Coop, and it's all yours.
Thank you, Gordon.
Cooper, we're gonna find Earle.
We will pursue, - capture and incarcerate.
- Capture and incarcerate.
Let's hit the road.
Come on, buster, I'm buying.
On your tail, Gordon.
Now, Leo pick three cards.
One, two, three.
Queen Donna.
Queen Audrey.
Queen Shelly, good.
Now, see if you can find the king.
Little Dale.
Now, we need one more queen.
Let's see.
The queen of hearts.
Let me see.
Miss Twin Peaks.
Now, what do you get if you win? You get a dozen roses, a scholarship to the college of your choice, the accolades of your peers Oh, yes, I know.
You get to die.
A royal execution.
And Cooper gets to watch.
Hello, Ben.
I need to talk to you.
How was everything, sir? Unbelievable.
- Is Audrey Horne here? - She's in the back.
I'll get her for you.
Thanks.
Donna, hi.
Hi, Donna.
Hi.
- Hi, Donna.
- Hi.
- Can I talk to you for a minute? - Sure.
This might sound a little strange.
What? Would you know any reason why my mom's visiting your dad? Not offhand.
Okay, well, yesterday, he came by the house to see my mom.
And today, she drove over here to see him.
Maybe she's just helping him with the Stop Ghostwood campaign.
No, she would have said something to me, and she hasn't said a word.
Is she here now? They're in his office together.
No, I won't accept them.
They're your letters.
They were written to you.
I don't want them.
I won't have them in my house any longer.
You've had them for 20 years.
Why now? That's just what I'm asking you.
Why now? They'll only succeed in ripping apart old wounds.
I can't bear the thought of it.
Eileen.
Eileen, why don't you believe me? Words aren't good enough.
I want my actions to speak for me.
Haven't you been listening? I have been wrong all these years.
I am trying to make up for it.
Sometimes, making up for things only makes it worse.
Oh, Eileen.
You should have been the best thing that ever happened to me.
Ben, please.
I haven't held you since that night.
Don't.
Oh, I wanna hold you.
I wanna go back.
- God, if you'd just-- - Please, don't! I'm sorry.
- Have you told her? - God, no.
Never.
I never will.
And you must promise me the same.
You mustn't come over again.
You must stay away from her.
I understand.
I hope you do.
What the hell was that all about? I don't know.
But I'm gonna find out.
Harry, the best cure I ever came across for a hangover was raw meat, and plenty of it.
You break an egg on it.
Add in some salted anchovies, Tabasco and Worcestershire sauce.
If you want, we can order up some for you.
Now that I come to mention it, Coop, you know what I'm in the mood for? What's that, Gordon? A steak so rare, you could sell it at Tiffany's.
Well, you've come to the right place.
Good deal.
Holy smokes, who is that? Shelly Johnson.
Shelly Johnson.
What a beauty.
Kind of reminds me of that statue, the babe without the arms.
- Venus de Milo.
- The name was Milo, but that's beside the point.
That's the kind of girl to make you wish you spoke a little French.
Excuse me, Coop, while I try my hand at a little counter Esperanto.
Good luck, Gordon.
Hello.
I was wondering if I might trouble you for a cup of strong, black coffee.
And in the process, engage you with an anecdote of no small amusement.
The name is Gordon Cole, and I couldn't help but notice you from the booth.
Andwell, seeing your beauty now, I feel as though my stomach is filled with a team of bumblebees.
You don't have to shout, I can hear you.
I heard that.
I heard that.
Do you want anything besides coffee? I heard you perfectly.
And I can hear you, honest, please-- You don't understand.
You don't understand, Miss Johnson.
Do you see these? For 20 years, I've been asking people to please speak up, but for some weird reason, I can hear you clear as a bell.
Say something else.
Do you want pie with your coffee? Good Lord.
I can hear you perfectly.
This is like some kind of miracle.
A phenomenon.
- What's wrong with miracles? - What's that? This cherry pie is a miracle.
Would you please ask the lady with the log to speak up? The pie, she was talking about the cherry pie.
I heard you again.
I heard you again.
Would you like some pie? Massive, massive quantities.
And a glass of water, sweetheart, my socks are on fire.
Harry.
That looks like a chickadee on a Dodge Dart.
No, it looks like a finch on a Dodge Dart.
Nope, chickadee on a Dodge Dart.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Cup of deep black joe? You bet.
What do you recommend for a hangover? Teetotaling and prayer.
Good answer.
I'll try some coffee.
How are you today? I'm fine.
I'm weird, actually.
I'm disoriented, I'm not sure where I am.
I mean, I know where I am, but it feels odd being here.
I'm okay.
Okay.
Listen to me, I've been out of circulation so long, I've completely forgotten the social niceties.
I mean, you ask me how I am, I'm not really supposed to say how I am.
I'm supposed to say, "I'm fine, thanks.
How are you?" I'm fine, thanks.
- You must think I'm really strange.
- No.
Well, with due respect to the social niceties, even if you did think I was strange, you wouldn't tell me, would you? No, if I thought you were strange, I'd tell you.
And you don't think so? Not a bit.
Good.
Glad we got that cleared up.
So, what will you have? I would like a chicken potpie and a large glass of milk, please.
Good choice.
All the major food groups represented.
Turkey sandwich, whole wheat, lettuce, dollop of mayonnaise, and I've got a joke for you.
Two penguins were walking across an iceberg.
One penguin turned to the second penguin and said: "You look like you're wearing a tuxedo.
" Annie? I heard that.
Wait a minute, I'll be right back.
I wasn't quite finished.
How long you been in love with her? Harry, who said anything about love? Coop, you just tried to tell her a joke.
I did? So, what did the second penguin say? Well, the first penguin said to the second penguin: "You look like you're wearing a tuxedo.
" And the second penguin said, "Maybe I am.
" The defense rests.
Do you want some more pie? A whole pie? Yes, I would, Miss Johnson, and a piece of paper and a pencil.
I plan on writing an epic poem about this gorgeous pie.
Okay.
I see that you've been to Owl Cave.
Sorry? Well, that design looks like the one up at Owl Cave.
Let me see that.
I combined Major Briggs' tattoo with the Log Lady's.
This looks exactly like the one at Owl Cave.
Harry, I've got to see this Owl Cave.
Dear Donna, You were right, I had to go.
Everything feels different when you're on the road.
It feels better.
San Francisco's really cool.
Next stop, Mexico.
I'll be back with a million stories.
I promise.
I love you, James.
James? How is he? He's good.
He's doing what he needed to do.
He'll be back.
Dad, can I ask you something? Sure.
How does Mom know Benjamin Horne? I doubt that she does, Donna.
Not very well.
He was over here yesterday.
They were talking like old friends.
Your mother works a lot with the local charities.
I'm sure even Ben contributes once in a while.
She drove to The Great Northern this morning to see him again.
Probably something to do with a fundraiser.
I don't think so.
Yeah, that's exactly what it was, she told me at breakfast.
One of those heal-the-planet things.
Well, she didn't mention it to me.
Well, that's exactly what it was, that's what she told me.
I'll get it.
Hi, I have a delivery for Mrs.
Hayward.
They said they're for Mom.
No card.
I'll put them in water.
Sorry, sorry, my fault.
- I didn't hear you.
- No.
One should never allow one's mind and one's foot to wander at the same time.
Edward Perkins.
Once again, my apologies.
Audrey Horne.
Nice to meet you, Mr.
Perkins.
So, what brings you to the library? I'm doing research on civil disobedience.
Good for you.
It is incumbent on the young to disobey.
Are you a professor? Well, I teach, poetry is my area of expertise.
You're kidding.
You know, someone sent me a poem, maybe you know it.
Oh, perhaps I do.
Now, let's have a look.
You read it.
Okay.
See the mountains kiss high heaven, And the waves clasp one another, No sister-flower would be forgiven If it disdain'd its brother, And the sunlight clasps the earth, And the moonbeams kiss the sea What is all this sweet work worth, If thou kiss not me? Yeah, you know it.
Yes.
Shelley.
What? Gazing at you reciting the verse of Shelley, you look very much like a queen.
Thank you.
I guess I better be going.
Nice meeting you.
- Perhaps we'll meet again someday.
- Yeah.
- Thinking of entering? - No.
I think the real world's strange enough without getting on-stage and parading around in a bathing suit and heels.
Guess the convent's not too big on that kind of stuff.
That's a good guess.
So, what's it like being back in civilization? It's not like they kept us up in an attic.
I mean, we had newspapers, we even had cable TV.
Every time I tell someone where I've been, they act like I'm out on parole.
Sorry.
You know what is weird? Being around men again.
Well, you don't have to spend time in a convent to feel that.
What do you know about Dale Cooper? Are we interested? Who said anything about that? Well, judging by the look on his face when he saw you today, I'd say you have a major opportunity.
Sorry, you have it all wrong.
I'm not even remotely interested.
Andy? Yes, Lucy.
I wanna thank you for helping out during the weasel riot yesterday.
Which is more than I can say for a certain Dick we both know.
Keeping the peace is part of my job.
Where are you going with all of that gear? Spelunking.
Is it dangerous? Spelunking? Sometimes.
Promise me something? Okay.
I know you'll be strong, and I know you'll be brave, but I want you to promise me that you'll be careful.
I'll be careful.
You have my word.
Ohdear.
- All set, Harry? - Pete just called in our next move.
- We expose a pawn to his bishop.
- Want me to hold off? No, Pete knows what he's doing.
If he takes that pawn, he forfeits the bishop.
Thus, losing his initial advantage.
How you feeling? Like someone pounded a railroad spike through my ear.
Then a descent into a cool, subterranean cave will be just what the doctor ordered.
Are you sure Cole's up for the climb? Gordon's not coming with us.
Shelly took him up to Doc Hayward's to see about his hearing problem.
The old tuning-fork test.
Audrey? When Jack Kennedy entered the White House, he took his brother with him.
Because he trusted Bobby to tell him the truth, even when it wasn't pretty.
When the Bay of Pigs went up in smoke, Bobby was there.
When the Russians moved their missiles into Fidel's backyard, Bobby was there to help his brother shoulder through.
Sort of how Jerry's done that for you? It's the unvarnished truth that I am looking for.
And I believe that you are the best man for the job.
Me? Audrey, I know that I haven't been a very good father.
Oh, heck, who am I kidding? When have I ever been anything but a sleazy, rapacious heel? Well, Daddy, maybe when I was little, but-- Exactly.
But I've changed.
And I am determined to be a better person.
The kind of father that you will respect someday.
When I think about Laura, when I think about the mistakes that I've made, I want to build a life in happiness for our whole family.
You, me.
Will you help me do that? Please? Daddy, I'm your man.
Sensational.
Audrey, pack a bag, get out to the airport, your plane leaves in an hour.
My plane? Oh, John.
Just the man that I wanna see.
Hi, Ben.
Hello, Audrey.
- Daddy-- - Audrey, you better get a move on.
One hour.
Audrey's on her way to Seattle tonight.
She's having a breakfast confab with the environmentalists.
We're going national with thispine-weasel thing.
Great, that's great.
Daddy, I'm not sure I can leave on such short notice.
Now, here are the particulars.
Time, place, so on.
Audrey, you bring us back good news.
Good news.
Well, guess I better go.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Travel safely, Audrey.
John.
How are you, Ben? I am filled to the brim with a feeling of goodness.
Like a Christmas tree all lit up inside.
But at the end of the day when I look in the mirror, I have to face the fact that I really don't know how to be good.
You're off to a pretty fair start.
How do you do it, John? What's the secret? Do you really think that I could learn to be good? I don't see why not.
Just keep your eye on your heart.
And always tell the truth.
- Always tell the truth.
- Tell the hardest truth first though.
Oh, always tell the hardest truth first.
Oh, I love that.
John, that's terrific.
This truth business, it's clearly at the forefront of goodness.
Ben? - I'm falling in love with your daughter.
- Yeah, that's a hard truth.
- Good example.
- It is the truth.
- It is? - Yep.
Oh, John.
- John.
- Ben.
What a wonderful world we live in.
- Come on, Andy.
- Get a good grip, Andy.
- Do it.
- That's it, Andy.
- Looking good.
- Hand over hand.
Almost there.
Take it easy.
- No, no, no.
Don't look down.
No.
- Hang on, Andy.
Don't look down.
- Hang on.
- Don't look down! - Andy.
- You okay? I'm fine.
Incredible.
We used to play here when I was a kid.
Pretend that it was haunted by fierce ghosts.
Beer drinkers, by the look of it.
Where's the symbol? This way.
It's right here.
There it is.
Two symbols combined into a larger whole.
But for what purpose? I don't know.
Beats me.
The tattoos are the question.
This must be the answer.
It's stuck.
My pick, it's stuck.
Oh, my God.
Holy smoke.
Look at that.
What have I done? Fellas, coincidence and fate figure largely in our lives.
It appears to be a petroglyph.
Harry, I have no idea where this will lead us.
But I have a definite feeling it will be a place both wonderful and strange.
Good evening.
Can I help you, young lady? Yes, I would like something to drink, but I'm not exactly sure what.
Ladies seem to like the rum.
Rum.
I would like to have a rum, please.
- With? - Tonic? Diane, Thursday, 9:05 p.
m.
I've just returned from a place called Owl Cave.
How I got there is a rather complicated story.
It all began with a pair of tattoos First one's on me.
Thank you.
- Hello, Annie.
- Hi.
- Can I get you something--? - No, no.
I have a rum and tonic.
I see.
One of the sisters used to put rum in her tea, and I thought it sounded exotic, so This is all new to you, isn't it? I feel constantly amazed, stunned.
Music and people, the way they talk and laugh, and the way some of them are so clearly in love.
It's like a foreign language to me.
I know just enough of the words to realize how little I understand.
Man, I would love to see the world through your eyes.
Why? Oh, there's some things I might do different if I had the chance.
Me too.
You see, the thing is, I failed before and I'm just afraid it might happen again.
You wanna talk about it? Not yet.
Maybe I can help.
Can you? If you want me to.
I'm stubborn.
Extremely willful.
I can handle that.
Some people think I'm strange.
I know the feeling.
I couldn't promise you that I would always make sense or do things that you would expect me to do.
Annie, I don't expect anything.
Then I accept your kind and generous offer.
Good.
I'm glad.
My, my, my.
What have we here? Could it be? Yes.
The symbol inverted.
Now