Heathcliff & the Catillac Cats (1984) s02e20 Episode Script
The New York City Sewer System/High Goon
1
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF,
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
PLAYING PRANKS ON EVERYONE
THERE'S A RACE TO BE ON TOP
THE COMPETITION
DOESN'T STOP ♪
MIXING WITH
THE LADIES FAIR ♪
BEING CHARMING, DEBONAIR
THE GANG WILL REIGN SUPREME
AND NO ONE CAN DENY-Y-Y-Y
THEY'LL MAKE DUMP HISTORY
AND ALWAYS HAVE
AN ALIBI-I-I ♪
SO JOIN IN THE JUBILEE
THE CATS ARE GREAT,
THEY'LL ALL AGREE ♪
FIND IN EACH CALAMITY
THE CATS' SUPERIORITY
OH OH OH OH OH OH
OH OH OH
OH OH OH OH OH OH OH OH
OH OH OH
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF,
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
YOU SHOULD REALIZE
HE CAN WIN IT WITH YOU
Iggy: OH, LOOK,
GRANDPA.
THAT'S EITHER
CENTRAL PARK,
OR ELSE SOME RICH GUY'S GO
A HUGE BACKYARD, RIGHT?
HEATHCLIFF!
GRANDMA, WHAT'S
THAT BIG BUILDING
STICKING WAY OU
INTO THE PARK?
OH, THAT'S THE HOME
OF MY OLD GIRLFRIEND
BACK WHEN I LIVED
HERE IN NEW YORK CITY.
YOU NEVER LIVED
IN NEW YORK,
AND I'M YOUR
OLD GIRLFRIEND.
IGGY, THAT LARGE BUILDING
IS WHERE WE'RE GOING--
THE MUSEUM.
[GRUNTING]
HA HA HA!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY THEY LEASH PETS.
HUMANS CAUSE
MUCH MORE DAMAGE.
THEN AGAIN, THEY DO PAY
FOR THE PET FOOD.
DANGEROUS WORK.
OOH! IT REMINDS ME
OF WASH DAY.
WATCH OUT FOR THE ALLIGATORS
DOWN THERE.
ALLIGATORS?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
GRANDPA?
IGGY, BELOW US
THERE ARE MILES AND MILES
OF DARK, LONELY PLACES
FOR ALLIGATORS TO ROAM.
EXCUSE ME.
BUFFALOROAM.
OOH! ALLIGATORS
SLITHER,
BUT NOT IN
THE NEW YORK CITY
SEWER SYSTEM.
THAT'S ONLY A MYTH.
NOTICE HOW THESE WORKERS
STAY IN BUNCHES?
THEY'RE AFRAID.
THEY EVEN LEAVE
IN A GROUP.
SOMEDAY, SOMEONE--
A NEW HERO--
WILL BE BRAVE ENOUGH
TO BRING ONE UP.
THAT SOMEONE WILL BE
REMEMBERED FOREVER
AS THE ONE WHO MADE
NEW YORKERS FACE
THE TRUTH--
DANGER LURKS
JUST A FLUSH AWAY.
Iggy: GREEN LIGHT.
I ALREADY TOLD YOU--NO.
THE ONLY FURS WE ACCEP
ARE FURS THAT ARE DEAD--
UH, NOT ALIVE.
SO UNLESS
YOU'RE WILLING
TO SKIN YOUR CAT--
LISTEN HERE,
HONEY PIE--
GRANDPA!
WILL YOU DO I
FOR $5.00?
IT WILL BEHAVE,
RIGHT?
I'LL BEHAVE
LIKE A TORNADO.
10 BUCKS.
THERE ISN'T A SHOPPING BAG
IN THE WORLD
THAT CAN HOLD ME.
[GRUNTING]
I'LL BREAK OUT OF HERE,
AND I'M GOING TO CATCH ME
AN ALLIGATOR, TOO--
MYTH OR NO MYTH.
THEN I'LL GE
THE RESPECT I DESERVE.
Woman: DON'T TRY IT,
ANIMAL.
MIGHT AS WELL CHECK OU
MY TEMPORARY QUARTERS.
AAH!
UGH!
[GROANING]
WHY DIDN'T THEY CARPE
THIS PLACE?
NO PROBLEM.
I'LL JUST CLIMB UP THE LADDER
AND SLIDE
THE COVER OFF.
[LOUD ROARING]
LET ME OUT OF HERE!
I'LL JUST FIND
ANOTHER ONE.
HELP!
[CRASH]
YOU KNOW, ANYONE CAN
COME TO NEW YORK CITY
AND GO TO A MUSEUM,
BUT HOW MANY TOURISTS
MAKE THE EFFORT TO SEE
THE REALNEW YORK?
[LOUD ROARING]
TIME TO MOVE ON.
OH, NO NEED TO GO
THAT WAY.
[LOUD ROARING]
HEY, I'M FLEXIBLE.
Grandpa: A MENACE
SOMEDAY SOMEONE WILL BE
BRAVE ENOUGH
TO BRING ONE UP.
SOMEONE WILL BE
BRAVE ENOUGH--
A NEW HERO.
I CAN BAG
AN ALLIGATOR.
[LOUD ROARING]
THE QUESTION IS,
DO I WANT TO BAG
AN ALLIGATOR?
THAT'S NEVER BEEN
ONE OF MY GOALS
BUT I AM HEATHCLIFF,
AND I AM GOING TO
GET ONE!
WHAT'S AN ALLIGATOR--
A DOG WITH SHORT LEGS?
NOW, WHERE IS
THAT WIMPY CREATURE?
[LOUD ROARING]
NO NEED FOR A COMPASS.
HERE WE GO.
FREEZE, LIZARD-FACE!
HOLD IT RIGHT--
UH, NO OFFENSE,
MR. GATOR, SIR.
[QUIETLY]
AND NOW THAT HE'S OFF GUARD
HEY!
ALL RIGHT!
I GIVE UP!
EAT ME PEACEFULLY.
JUST SWALLOW
AND SKIP THE CHEWING.
[LAUGHTER]
SURE, YOU LOST,
BUT YOU WEN
THE DISTANCE.
[IMITATING ROCKY]
YO, ADRIAN, I LOVE YOU.
HA HA HA!
[PANTING]
JUST WHAT I NEED--
SOMEPLACE TO REST.
HUH?
[GASPING]
WHOA!
MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF.
WHAT'S YOURS?
WHAT'S THE MATTER--
CAT GOT YOUR TONGUE?
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
I LIKE YOUR ENTHUSIASM,
BUT I DIDN'T MEAN
THATCLOSE.
I'VE GOT TO THINK
OF SOMETHING!
NICE MOVE. SHH.
[GROWLING]
[ROARING]
HA HA HA!
I CAME TO CAPTURE
AN ALLIGATOR,
AND I'M GOING TO
CAPTURE AN ALLIGATOR!
YEE-HA!
HEY, HEY, HEY!
OH, YEOW! OH! OH!
[ROARING]
WHOA!
I'M GLAD
THAT'S OVER.
[SNARLING]
HUH?
WHOA!
AAH! AAH!
[ROARING]
[SCREAMING]
HUH!
[GRUNTING]
HUH?
OH!
All: 1, 2, 3!
SO, MANY THANKS
TO THIS BRAVE CA
WHO FOUND
THE NEW YORK ZOO'S
MISSING ALLIGATOR.
THANK YOU.
[CHEERING
AND APPLAUSE]
UH, YOUR CA
SKIPPED TOWN.
HERE'S YOUR
10 BUCKS BACK.
THERE'S
OUR HEATHCLIFF!
Iggy:
HEATHCLIFF!
LUCKY US!
GUESS I LOOKED
IN THE WRONG BAG.
NOWDO YOU
BELIEVE ME
ABOUT THE GATORS?
[OFF-KEY]
WHEN I FIRST SAW YOU
I KNEW IT WAS LOVE
[GUITAR PLAYING]
YOUR CLAWS ARE
MORE BEAUTIFUL
THAN A ♪
UH, UH
LOVE.
NO. WHAT RHYMES
WITH "LOVE"?
"DOVE" RHYMES
WITH "LOVE."
RIGHT.
YOUR CLAWS
ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL
THAN A DOVE'S ♪
YOUR FACE SHONE
SO BRIGHT ♪
IN THE RAYS
OF THE SUN ♪
I KNEW FOREVER
WE WOULD HAVE ♪
AH, WRITING
A LOVE SONG FOR CLEO.
AIN'T THAT SWEET,
GUYS?
HUH?
HE'S IN LOVE!
THAT'S NICE.
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
I'M TOO COOL TO TELL CLEO
I LOVE HER.
SHE KNOWS THAT.
IN FACT,
WHEN WE FIRST MET,
SHE GOT TO SEE
HOW COOL I REALLY AM.
WHAT A DAY THAT WAS.
OH, NO.
HERE WE GO.
WE ME
IN THE SCRATCHING POST,
ONE OF THE TOUGHES
HANGOUTS AROUND.
THIS PLACE WAS SO TOUGH
GARBAGEMEN WERE AFRAID
TO PICK UP THE TRASH,
BUT THAT DIDN'T BOTHER ME.
I KNEW WHAT TO EXPECT.
GRR
UH, HERE,
MR. RIFFRAFF.
WOULD YOU LIKE
MY CHAIR?
HUH?
YES, SIR, MR. RIFFRAFF.
WHAT CAN I GET YOU, SIR?
A MILK.
YES, SIR.
RIGHT AWAY, SIR.
[POURING MILK]
WOW!
Riffraff, voice-over:
THAT'S WHEN I FIRST SAW HER.
HEY, BABY,
THE TIME IS RIGH
FOR YOU AND ME
TONIGHT.
WHO, ME?
YOU LIKE ME?
YOU'LL HAVE TO
ASK MY DATE.
THIS IS GOON
AND HIS TWO BROTHERS.
IS THERE SOMETHING
YOU BOYS WANT?
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
THERE IS.
UH, YOUR AUTOGRAPH.
Riffraff, voice-over:
NATURALLY, I REFUSED
AND TOOK CLEO
OUT OF THERE
BEFORE I HAD TO CAUSE
ANY MORE TROUBLE.
YEAH.
CLEO KNEW I WAS
THE COOLEST CAT AROUND.
THAT'S THE CRAZIES
THING I EVER HEARD.
CLEO! AAH!
UGH!
YEAH, GEE, CLEO,
WE WERE JUST TALKING
ABOUT HOW COOL
RIFFRAFF IS.
I HEARD.
RIFFRAFF TOLD YOU
ONE SIDE OF THE STORY--
THE WRONGSIDE.
WE MET AT THE SCRATCHING POST,
ALL RIGHT.
I WAS OUT WITH GOON
THAT NIGHT.
HEY, CLEO, BABY,
YOU'RE HERE
WITH THE STRONGES
CAT IN THE WORLD.
MAKES YOU FEEL
PRETTY GOOD, HUH?
[SARCASTICALLY]
TREMENDOUS.
YEAH?
HEY, WATCH
WHERE YOU'RE WALKING!
AAH!
UGH!
H-HI, GUYS.
WHO'S WINNING?
EXCUSE ME.
I'M LEAVING NOW.
WATER.
[LAUGHTER]
I CAN'T FIND
MY BRUSH.
I'LL HELP YOU,
BABE.
HUH?
HERE IT IS.
AAH!
UGH!
UGH!
WHO DID THAT?
[RIFFRAFF STAMMERING]
AAH!
Cleo: COME ON, GOON.
PUT HIM DOWN.
WOW.
SURE THING,
BABY.
AAH!
OOH!
COME ON, GUYS. HOW ABOU
A LITTLE SOFTBALL?
UGH!
AAH!
OOH!
[BOTTLES SHATTERING]
AAH!
AAH!
YEOW!
UGH!
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
GOON AND HIS BROTHERS
ARE OUT COLD.
WE'D BETTER GO NOW.
I REALLY
SHOWED THEM, HUH?
KNOCKED THEIR LIGHTS
RIGHT OUT.
RIFFRAFF NEVER THREW
A PUNCH.
ONCE THE TRUTH
COMES OUT,
WE SEE IT WASN'
MUCH OF A BOUT.
IF YOU GUYS SAW THE SIZE
OF THIS MONSTER,
YOU'D TURN KITTY, TOO!
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
YOU'LL SEE GOON TODAY.
TODAY?!
I CAME TO TELL YOU--
GOON AND HIS BROTHERS
ARE HEADING INTO TOWN
ON THE 12:00 TRAIN.
THAT MEANS I'VE ONLY
GOT ONE HOUR TO CATCH
THE 11:55 TRAIN
OUT OF TOWN.
HEY, EVERYONE, LOOK
AT OUR BRAVE LEADER
TURN FRAIDY-CAT.
I'M NOT A FRAIDY-CAT.
I'M A SMART CAT--
SMART ENOUGH TO LEAVE
BEFORE I LOSE MY WHISKERS.
YEAH, RIFFRAFF, ARE YOU
GOING TO LEAVE CLEO?
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I'LL STAY.
I KNEW HE WOULD.
RIFFRAFF'S REALLY BRAVE
UNDERNEATH.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GOING TO
HAVE MUCH OF A CHANCE
FIGHTING THIS GUY
IF HE'S SLEEPING.
THIS WILL
WAKE HIM UP.
WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?
WHAT TIME IS IT?
TIME TO SHAPE UP
OR GET BEAT UP.
LET ME GO!
LET ME GO!
[BELL RINGING]
[TRAIN APPROACHING]
[GULP]
AH, I BET THESE GUYS
ARE WIMPS,
WEAKLINGS, NERDS!
YOU KNOW THE KIND--
ALL TALK
AND NO ACTION.
OK, LET'S FIND
RIFFRAFF.
HEY, YOUR FRIENDS
JUST SHOWED UP,
AND I THINK THEY'RE
LOOKING FOR YOU
UNLESS YOU'D LIKE
CLEO TO GREET THEM.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I'LL SHOW THEM!
UH-OH.
IF YOU GOT SOMETHING
TO SAY, RIFFRAFF,
SAY IT TO MY FACE.
YOU SEE, WHAT I HAD
IN MIND, UH,
IS THAT SOMETIMES,
UH
All: COME ON,
SAY IT! GO ON!
GOON, THIS TOWN
ISN'T BIG ENOUGH
FOR THE TWO OF US.
YOU CAN LEAVE
ANYTIME.
HEY, RIFFRAFF,
HOW'S MY GIRL CLEO?
THAT'S FUNNY.
SHE WAS JUS
TALKING ABOUT YOU.
THAT'S THE ONLY FIGH
I EVER LOST.
YOU AND ME GOT SOME
UNFINISHED BUSINESS.
SO WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE, GOON?
DID YOU GO
TO ALL THIS EXPENSE
TO COME
ACROSS THE COUNTRY
JUST TO BEAT ME UP?
ACTUALLY, I DIDN'T.
I CAME TO WISH YOU ALL THE BEST.
I THINK YOU MAKE
A WONDERFUL COUPLE.
I ALWAYS FELT BAD
ABOUT THAT TIME
I ROUGHED YOU UP,
AND I WAN
TO APOLOGIZE.
YOU DO?
I HAVE TO CATCH
A TRAIN HOME NOW,
BUT COULD YOU
GIVE THESE TO CLEO
AND TELL HER HELLO?
YEAH, HE WASN'
SUCH A BAD GUY.
Cleo: RIFFRAFF!
RIFFRAFF,
I'M PROUD OF YOU.
YOU USED YOUR BRAINS,
NOT YOUR BRAWN--
WHAT LITTLE YOU HAVE.
BUT THAT'S WHY
I LIKE YOU.
HERE'S SOME FLOWERS
I BOUGHT.
BOW WOW WOW WOW!
IF YOU LET YOUR PUPPY CHEW AN
OLD SHOE OR SLIPPER,
HE JUST MIGHT CHEW UP YOUR NEW
SHOES AND SLIPPERS.
A PUPPY CAN'T TELL THE
DIFFERENCE.
SO GIVE HIM A BONE OR A PIECE OF
RAWHIDE.
THAT'LL DO THE TRICK.
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
FOX FAMILY CHANNEL
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF,
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
PLAYING PRANKS ON EVERYONE
THERE'S A RACE TO BE ON TOP
THE COMPETITION
DOESN'T STOP ♪
MIXING WITH
THE LADIES FAIR ♪
BEING CHARMING, DEBONAIR
THE GANG WILL REIGN SUPREME
AND NO ONE CAN DENY-Y-Y-Y
THEY'LL MAKE DUMP HISTORY
AND ALWAYS HAVE
AN ALIBI-I-I ♪
SO JOIN IN THE JUBILEE
THE CATS ARE GREAT,
THEY'LL ALL AGREE ♪
FIND IN EACH CALAMITY
THE CATS' SUPERIORITY
OH OH OH OH OH OH
OH OH OH
OH OH OH OH OH OH OH OH
OH OH OH
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF,
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR NEIGHBORHOOD
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
YOU SHOULD REALIZE
HE CAN WIN IT WITH YOU
Iggy: OH, LOOK,
GRANDPA.
THAT'S EITHER
CENTRAL PARK,
OR ELSE SOME RICH GUY'S GO
A HUGE BACKYARD, RIGHT?
HEATHCLIFF!
GRANDMA, WHAT'S
THAT BIG BUILDING
STICKING WAY OU
INTO THE PARK?
OH, THAT'S THE HOME
OF MY OLD GIRLFRIEND
BACK WHEN I LIVED
HERE IN NEW YORK CITY.
YOU NEVER LIVED
IN NEW YORK,
AND I'M YOUR
OLD GIRLFRIEND.
IGGY, THAT LARGE BUILDING
IS WHERE WE'RE GOING--
THE MUSEUM.
[GRUNTING]
HA HA HA!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY THEY LEASH PETS.
HUMANS CAUSE
MUCH MORE DAMAGE.
THEN AGAIN, THEY DO PAY
FOR THE PET FOOD.
DANGEROUS WORK.
OOH! IT REMINDS ME
OF WASH DAY.
WATCH OUT FOR THE ALLIGATORS
DOWN THERE.
ALLIGATORS?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
GRANDPA?
IGGY, BELOW US
THERE ARE MILES AND MILES
OF DARK, LONELY PLACES
FOR ALLIGATORS TO ROAM.
EXCUSE ME.
BUFFALOROAM.
OOH! ALLIGATORS
SLITHER,
BUT NOT IN
THE NEW YORK CITY
SEWER SYSTEM.
THAT'S ONLY A MYTH.
NOTICE HOW THESE WORKERS
STAY IN BUNCHES?
THEY'RE AFRAID.
THEY EVEN LEAVE
IN A GROUP.
SOMEDAY, SOMEONE--
A NEW HERO--
WILL BE BRAVE ENOUGH
TO BRING ONE UP.
THAT SOMEONE WILL BE
REMEMBERED FOREVER
AS THE ONE WHO MADE
NEW YORKERS FACE
THE TRUTH--
DANGER LURKS
JUST A FLUSH AWAY.
Iggy: GREEN LIGHT.
I ALREADY TOLD YOU--NO.
THE ONLY FURS WE ACCEP
ARE FURS THAT ARE DEAD--
UH, NOT ALIVE.
SO UNLESS
YOU'RE WILLING
TO SKIN YOUR CAT--
LISTEN HERE,
HONEY PIE--
GRANDPA!
WILL YOU DO I
FOR $5.00?
IT WILL BEHAVE,
RIGHT?
I'LL BEHAVE
LIKE A TORNADO.
10 BUCKS.
THERE ISN'T A SHOPPING BAG
IN THE WORLD
THAT CAN HOLD ME.
[GRUNTING]
I'LL BREAK OUT OF HERE,
AND I'M GOING TO CATCH ME
AN ALLIGATOR, TOO--
MYTH OR NO MYTH.
THEN I'LL GE
THE RESPECT I DESERVE.
Woman: DON'T TRY IT,
ANIMAL.
MIGHT AS WELL CHECK OU
MY TEMPORARY QUARTERS.
AAH!
UGH!
[GROANING]
WHY DIDN'T THEY CARPE
THIS PLACE?
NO PROBLEM.
I'LL JUST CLIMB UP THE LADDER
AND SLIDE
THE COVER OFF.
[LOUD ROARING]
LET ME OUT OF HERE!
I'LL JUST FIND
ANOTHER ONE.
HELP!
[CRASH]
YOU KNOW, ANYONE CAN
COME TO NEW YORK CITY
AND GO TO A MUSEUM,
BUT HOW MANY TOURISTS
MAKE THE EFFORT TO SEE
THE REALNEW YORK?
[LOUD ROARING]
TIME TO MOVE ON.
OH, NO NEED TO GO
THAT WAY.
[LOUD ROARING]
HEY, I'M FLEXIBLE.
Grandpa: A MENACE
SOMEDAY SOMEONE WILL BE
BRAVE ENOUGH
TO BRING ONE UP.
SOMEONE WILL BE
BRAVE ENOUGH--
A NEW HERO.
I CAN BAG
AN ALLIGATOR.
[LOUD ROARING]
THE QUESTION IS,
DO I WANT TO BAG
AN ALLIGATOR?
THAT'S NEVER BEEN
ONE OF MY GOALS
BUT I AM HEATHCLIFF,
AND I AM GOING TO
GET ONE!
WHAT'S AN ALLIGATOR--
A DOG WITH SHORT LEGS?
NOW, WHERE IS
THAT WIMPY CREATURE?
[LOUD ROARING]
NO NEED FOR A COMPASS.
HERE WE GO.
FREEZE, LIZARD-FACE!
HOLD IT RIGHT--
UH, NO OFFENSE,
MR. GATOR, SIR.
[QUIETLY]
AND NOW THAT HE'S OFF GUARD
HEY!
ALL RIGHT!
I GIVE UP!
EAT ME PEACEFULLY.
JUST SWALLOW
AND SKIP THE CHEWING.
[LAUGHTER]
SURE, YOU LOST,
BUT YOU WEN
THE DISTANCE.
[IMITATING ROCKY]
YO, ADRIAN, I LOVE YOU.
HA HA HA!
[PANTING]
JUST WHAT I NEED--
SOMEPLACE TO REST.
HUH?
[GASPING]
WHOA!
MY NAME IS HEATHCLIFF.
WHAT'S YOURS?
WHAT'S THE MATTER--
CAT GOT YOUR TONGUE?
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
I LIKE YOUR ENTHUSIASM,
BUT I DIDN'T MEAN
THATCLOSE.
I'VE GOT TO THINK
OF SOMETHING!
NICE MOVE. SHH.
[GROWLING]
[ROARING]
HA HA HA!
I CAME TO CAPTURE
AN ALLIGATOR,
AND I'M GOING TO
CAPTURE AN ALLIGATOR!
YEE-HA!
HEY, HEY, HEY!
OH, YEOW! OH! OH!
[ROARING]
WHOA!
I'M GLAD
THAT'S OVER.
[SNARLING]
HUH?
WHOA!
AAH! AAH!
[ROARING]
[SCREAMING]
HUH!
[GRUNTING]
HUH?
OH!
All: 1, 2, 3!
SO, MANY THANKS
TO THIS BRAVE CA
WHO FOUND
THE NEW YORK ZOO'S
MISSING ALLIGATOR.
THANK YOU.
[CHEERING
AND APPLAUSE]
UH, YOUR CA
SKIPPED TOWN.
HERE'S YOUR
10 BUCKS BACK.
THERE'S
OUR HEATHCLIFF!
Iggy:
HEATHCLIFF!
LUCKY US!
GUESS I LOOKED
IN THE WRONG BAG.
NOWDO YOU
BELIEVE ME
ABOUT THE GATORS?
[OFF-KEY]
WHEN I FIRST SAW YOU
I KNEW IT WAS LOVE
[GUITAR PLAYING]
YOUR CLAWS ARE
MORE BEAUTIFUL
THAN A ♪
UH, UH
LOVE.
NO. WHAT RHYMES
WITH "LOVE"?
"DOVE" RHYMES
WITH "LOVE."
RIGHT.
YOUR CLAWS
ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL
THAN A DOVE'S ♪
YOUR FACE SHONE
SO BRIGHT ♪
IN THE RAYS
OF THE SUN ♪
I KNEW FOREVER
WE WOULD HAVE ♪
AH, WRITING
A LOVE SONG FOR CLEO.
AIN'T THAT SWEET,
GUYS?
HUH?
HE'S IN LOVE!
THAT'S NICE.
HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
I'M TOO COOL TO TELL CLEO
I LOVE HER.
SHE KNOWS THAT.
IN FACT,
WHEN WE FIRST MET,
SHE GOT TO SEE
HOW COOL I REALLY AM.
WHAT A DAY THAT WAS.
OH, NO.
HERE WE GO.
WE ME
IN THE SCRATCHING POST,
ONE OF THE TOUGHES
HANGOUTS AROUND.
THIS PLACE WAS SO TOUGH
GARBAGEMEN WERE AFRAID
TO PICK UP THE TRASH,
BUT THAT DIDN'T BOTHER ME.
I KNEW WHAT TO EXPECT.
GRR
UH, HERE,
MR. RIFFRAFF.
WOULD YOU LIKE
MY CHAIR?
HUH?
YES, SIR, MR. RIFFRAFF.
WHAT CAN I GET YOU, SIR?
A MILK.
YES, SIR.
RIGHT AWAY, SIR.
[POURING MILK]
WOW!
Riffraff, voice-over:
THAT'S WHEN I FIRST SAW HER.
HEY, BABY,
THE TIME IS RIGH
FOR YOU AND ME
TONIGHT.
WHO, ME?
YOU LIKE ME?
YOU'LL HAVE TO
ASK MY DATE.
THIS IS GOON
AND HIS TWO BROTHERS.
IS THERE SOMETHING
YOU BOYS WANT?
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
THERE IS.
UH, YOUR AUTOGRAPH.
Riffraff, voice-over:
NATURALLY, I REFUSED
AND TOOK CLEO
OUT OF THERE
BEFORE I HAD TO CAUSE
ANY MORE TROUBLE.
YEAH.
CLEO KNEW I WAS
THE COOLEST CAT AROUND.
THAT'S THE CRAZIES
THING I EVER HEARD.
CLEO! AAH!
UGH!
YEAH, GEE, CLEO,
WE WERE JUST TALKING
ABOUT HOW COOL
RIFFRAFF IS.
I HEARD.
RIFFRAFF TOLD YOU
ONE SIDE OF THE STORY--
THE WRONGSIDE.
WE MET AT THE SCRATCHING POST,
ALL RIGHT.
I WAS OUT WITH GOON
THAT NIGHT.
HEY, CLEO, BABY,
YOU'RE HERE
WITH THE STRONGES
CAT IN THE WORLD.
MAKES YOU FEEL
PRETTY GOOD, HUH?
[SARCASTICALLY]
TREMENDOUS.
YEAH?
HEY, WATCH
WHERE YOU'RE WALKING!
AAH!
UGH!
H-HI, GUYS.
WHO'S WINNING?
EXCUSE ME.
I'M LEAVING NOW.
WATER.
[LAUGHTER]
I CAN'T FIND
MY BRUSH.
I'LL HELP YOU,
BABE.
HUH?
HERE IT IS.
AAH!
UGH!
UGH!
WHO DID THAT?
[RIFFRAFF STAMMERING]
AAH!
Cleo: COME ON, GOON.
PUT HIM DOWN.
WOW.
SURE THING,
BABY.
AAH!
OOH!
COME ON, GUYS. HOW ABOU
A LITTLE SOFTBALL?
UGH!
AAH!
OOH!
[BOTTLES SHATTERING]
AAH!
AAH!
YEOW!
UGH!
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
GOON AND HIS BROTHERS
ARE OUT COLD.
WE'D BETTER GO NOW.
I REALLY
SHOWED THEM, HUH?
KNOCKED THEIR LIGHTS
RIGHT OUT.
RIFFRAFF NEVER THREW
A PUNCH.
ONCE THE TRUTH
COMES OUT,
WE SEE IT WASN'
MUCH OF A BOUT.
IF YOU GUYS SAW THE SIZE
OF THIS MONSTER,
YOU'D TURN KITTY, TOO!
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
YOU'LL SEE GOON TODAY.
TODAY?!
I CAME TO TELL YOU--
GOON AND HIS BROTHERS
ARE HEADING INTO TOWN
ON THE 12:00 TRAIN.
THAT MEANS I'VE ONLY
GOT ONE HOUR TO CATCH
THE 11:55 TRAIN
OUT OF TOWN.
HEY, EVERYONE, LOOK
AT OUR BRAVE LEADER
TURN FRAIDY-CAT.
I'M NOT A FRAIDY-CAT.
I'M A SMART CAT--
SMART ENOUGH TO LEAVE
BEFORE I LOSE MY WHISKERS.
YEAH, RIFFRAFF, ARE YOU
GOING TO LEAVE CLEO?
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I'LL STAY.
I KNEW HE WOULD.
RIFFRAFF'S REALLY BRAVE
UNDERNEATH.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GOING TO
HAVE MUCH OF A CHANCE
FIGHTING THIS GUY
IF HE'S SLEEPING.
THIS WILL
WAKE HIM UP.
WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?
WHAT TIME IS IT?
TIME TO SHAPE UP
OR GET BEAT UP.
LET ME GO!
LET ME GO!
[BELL RINGING]
[TRAIN APPROACHING]
[GULP]
AH, I BET THESE GUYS
ARE WIMPS,
WEAKLINGS, NERDS!
YOU KNOW THE KIND--
ALL TALK
AND NO ACTION.
OK, LET'S FIND
RIFFRAFF.
HEY, YOUR FRIENDS
JUST SHOWED UP,
AND I THINK THEY'RE
LOOKING FOR YOU
UNLESS YOU'D LIKE
CLEO TO GREET THEM.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I'LL SHOW THEM!
UH-OH.
IF YOU GOT SOMETHING
TO SAY, RIFFRAFF,
SAY IT TO MY FACE.
YOU SEE, WHAT I HAD
IN MIND, UH,
IS THAT SOMETIMES,
UH
All: COME ON,
SAY IT! GO ON!
GOON, THIS TOWN
ISN'T BIG ENOUGH
FOR THE TWO OF US.
YOU CAN LEAVE
ANYTIME.
HEY, RIFFRAFF,
HOW'S MY GIRL CLEO?
THAT'S FUNNY.
SHE WAS JUS
TALKING ABOUT YOU.
THAT'S THE ONLY FIGH
I EVER LOST.
YOU AND ME GOT SOME
UNFINISHED BUSINESS.
SO WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE, GOON?
DID YOU GO
TO ALL THIS EXPENSE
TO COME
ACROSS THE COUNTRY
JUST TO BEAT ME UP?
ACTUALLY, I DIDN'T.
I CAME TO WISH YOU ALL THE BEST.
I THINK YOU MAKE
A WONDERFUL COUPLE.
I ALWAYS FELT BAD
ABOUT THAT TIME
I ROUGHED YOU UP,
AND I WAN
TO APOLOGIZE.
YOU DO?
I HAVE TO CATCH
A TRAIN HOME NOW,
BUT COULD YOU
GIVE THESE TO CLEO
AND TELL HER HELLO?
YEAH, HE WASN'
SUCH A BAD GUY.
Cleo: RIFFRAFF!
RIFFRAFF,
I'M PROUD OF YOU.
YOU USED YOUR BRAINS,
NOT YOUR BRAWN--
WHAT LITTLE YOU HAVE.
BUT THAT'S WHY
I LIKE YOU.
HERE'S SOME FLOWERS
I BOUGHT.
BOW WOW WOW WOW!
IF YOU LET YOUR PUPPY CHEW AN
OLD SHOE OR SLIPPER,
HE JUST MIGHT CHEW UP YOUR NEW
SHOES AND SLIPPERS.
A PUPPY CAN'T TELL THE
DIFFERENCE.
SO GIVE HIM A BONE OR A PIECE OF
RAWHIDE.
THAT'LL DO THE TRICK.
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
FOX FAMILY CHANNEL
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION