Xiaolin Showdown (2003) s02e21 Episode Script
The New Order
1
Xiaolin Showdown.
Xiaolin Showdown.
Clay: Dojo, can you
slow down just a mite?
Don't sweat it, cowboy.
This is China.
I know these mountains
like the back of my hand.
Kimiko: But you don't
have hands, Dojo.
Good point.
All: Aah!
Oh! My stomach. I think
I left it outside.
Incoming!
All: Aah!
Don't just stand there
picking your nose, you big oaf!
Keep throwing!
Aah!
Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Stuck with a one-eyed halfwit.
Oh! That was close.
I'd say it was more
than just close. Huh?
Well, looky there.
It's the Shen Gong Wu.
Rargh!
Time to kick ogre butt.
Typhoon boom! Wind!
Argh!
Unh! Seismic kick! Earth!
Argh! Ooh! Ow!
Hold it! Aah!
Oof! Ha ha ha!
Ha! Nice try, Jack Spicer,
but I believe the
Shen Gong Wu is mine.
Oh, give me a break!
I worked my fingers to the
bone to get here first
and I Wind up with bupkes. Aah!
Aah!
Oh! Aah!
Nice catch, Dojo!
What did you have for lunch?!
Jack's no threat anymore.
No Wuya, no Jackbots,
just a big one-eyed loser.
We kicked his butt.
The map of evil
may have changed,
but that does not mean there
is no longer any threat.
There is still Chase Young.
And now Wuya is with him.
That will only
make him stronger.
You may have beaten
Chase Young once,
but he was not defeated.
To eat rotten egg rolls
once is difficult.
To eat them twice
is another thing.
What does that mean?
Who knows? Just do what I do.
Smile and nod.
They all think they
have me beat, huh?
MonksLosers.
WuyaUgly loser.
Chase YoungWell,
he is kind of cool.
But I am Jack Spicer,
price of darkness,
and I have a plan. Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Oh, stop that!
You're not allowed to evil laugh
until you can do it neatly.
Wuya: You didn't even
bother to go after
the last 3 Shen Gong Wu.
I am not interested in
your little magical toys.
When I feel like it,
I'll get you some.
Right now I have more
important matters,
like delivering young
Omi to our evil ways.
I don't understand.
Why are you wasting your time
with that runt of a monk?
That is exactly the point.
You don't understand!
Kindly leave me to my plans.
Ah! Such command,
such authority.
Why, if I were 500 years
younger and had a body
Grr.
According to my tongue,
that by the way
has a coat harrier than
a woolly mammoth
The Wu shu visor is in sight.
Where? Somewhere in the sand.
That shouldn't be
so hard to find
In our lifetime.
Uh-oh! I think I spotted it.
Why "uh-oh?"
Because Chase Young
has spotted it first.
I believe that is ours!
I like your spunk, little one.
Care to try to take it from me?
Perhaps you would like to take
the Shen Gong Wu from me
with my back turned.
If there's one thing
I can't stand
it's a cocky evildoer.
All: Dragon x-kumei formation!
Hyah!
Mmm. Isn't he a work of art?
Hyah!
So, we meet again.
Uh, nice cats.
Yeah. Sure hope
they're well fed.
Monkey face!
Lizard eyes!
Rooster kick!
Leopard strike!
Rising snake!
Yaah!
Hyah!
You've learned well.
Now show me something
I don't know.
Say hello to my little friend.
Is this the best
you can do, Jack?
Aaaahhh! Aagghh!
The idea is adequate,
but the execution is lacking,
as are you.
Oh, yeah?
Well, I've got something
that you don't.
Very small hands?
No. The sphere of yun.
Hah!
Who's your evil bad dude now?
I'm bad. I'm bad.
I not only have Chase captured,
I have his powers, too.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Let me check.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. He's right!
The sphere of yun not only
traps its subject in a cage,
but gives its possessor control
of its possessees' possessions.
Cool. That's a mouthful.
Which means the jungle cats
are now in my control.
Hyah!
Here, kitty, kitties.
That's a good kitty.
Come to papa Jack.
Aah!
Don't bite off more than
you can chew, Spicer.
It may come back to bite you.
Oh? Oh, yeah?
So tell me,
who would you rather
be right now,
me or you? Ha ha ha!
Ba-a-ll!
I can't believe it.
Score one for the guy
with all the makeup.
Hmm?
Ahhh.
AhhhHa ha
Ohhh
AhhhAh.
Yeah.
I gotta hand it to you,
this is one fine crib,
and now it's my crib.
You should count
your good fortune
While it lasts.
Ooooohh!
I'm so scared.
I wasn't good enough
to work with you.
But you're not in
charge anymore,
Mr. high and dragon
mighty, are you?
I'm in charge.
Jack Spicer.
What you say?
Jack Spicer--
that's right!
Could you keep it down?
I think I'll get some sleep.
Where's your evil
super-genius now?
Asleep in a cage like a parrot.
Ha ha ha ha!
Oh, Jack,
you know you were
always my favorite.
AhhAhhAhhAhh--
yo, Einstein!
Saddle up!
It's time we spread some
of our evil fortune.
Ah ha ha ha ha ha!
Aah ha ha ha ha ha!
Aah ha ha ha ha!
Aaah ha ha ha!
All of the powers of Chase Young
and all the idiocy
of Jack Spicer
What a scary combination.
Maybe he will finally be satisfied
and quit his evil ways.
Oh!
If you are here to surrender,
you are most welcome.
Otherwise, prepare for defeat.
"Otherwise, prepare for defeat."
You're more fool
yourself than me.
Jungle cats, entertain
my little friends.
All: Dragon x-kumei formation!
Hyah!
Arrgh!
Ohh!
Cyclops, to the vault!
Huh? Hu-u-uh?
Aaah!
Ooh, the flying crane
hokaido masher move.
Ugh!
Master Fung, are you all right?
I am fine.
I am just not as young
as I used to be.
We must get to the
vault at once.
Uh
Ha ha ha. Ha ha.
Eeyuu.
Unh!
Arrggh!
Omi: Jack Spicer!
You got away from the cats
sooner than I expected.
That is because nobody expects the
flying crane hokaido masher move!
Anyway, it's been real, but we
got places to go and evil to do.
One-eyed freak, giddyap!
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!
Gee, it's not too bad.
Most of the Wu's still here.
Not too bad? It was a disaster.
I've got cat spit in places I
don't even like to think about.
Fighting Jack is one thing,
but those jungle
cats are too much!
We may never win
another Shen Gong Wu.
It was better when
Chase had the power.
At least he did not
go after the Wu.
What are you talking about?
He's the enemy, Omi.
I was simply talking out loud.
I meant nothing.
I must do this alone.
If I am wrong,
at least my friends will not
have to share in my mistake.
Golden Tiger Claws!
I didn't realize it
was visiting hours.
I--i have not come for a visit.
So why are you here?
To rescue you!
Reversing Mirror!
And now there's
something I must do.
Thank me?
Destroy you.
You really should be more
careful who you trust.
That seems only to be a
problem when I trust you.
Red ball Tsunami!
You learned well from
our last encounter.
Well, I was taught by the best.
Thank you.
I was speaking of Master Fung.
So have you reconsidered
my offer to join me?
No. I owed you a favor,
and now I have repaid it.
You may be closer than
you think to joining me
with that little white lie.
I do not lie!
Really?
You mean you didn't free me
for your own self-interest
to stop that nitwit Jack Spicer?
WellMaybeA little.
Isn't that what
evil is all about?
A lie here, a
little bad there
Suddenly it's so easy.
Dojo, what's wrong?
What in the wild Bob
west is going on?
It's round guy. He's gone!
Oh, no! Omi must've gone
to fight Jack on his own!
That little feller has more
pride than a dog has fleas.
We got to hurry.
Omi may need us.
Dismount!
Hey, hey, hey!
How's it going,
Mr. I-used-to-be- somebody-evil?
It goes well.
And you?
Better than you can say, loser.
Ha ha!
Has been, old evil relic,
old evil doo-doo head!
Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!
Ha haHa
Hey, hey, how'd you get
all the way over here
when I left you over there?
Please don't hurt me!
I'm frail and I bruise easily.
I was always with you, Chase.
At least in spirit.
There's one thing
I want to know.
Yes, anything.
Who would you rather
be right now?
You
Or me?
You.
Care to watch, Omi?
No!
This is my battle.
Return the Shen Gong Wu now
or suffer a humiliating defeat.
Oh, that's right.
Gang up on the weakling.
Stand back!
I have Wu and I'm not
afraid to use them.
Star Hanabi.
Tangle Web Comb!
Third arm Sash?
Waah! Waah! Ooh! Aah!
Don't just stand
there, you big oaf!
Get him!
Much obliged, though I
had it under control.
Those are my stolen
Shen Gong Wu.
I'm going to blast you
into next Saturday.
Hey, how did Chase get out?
Kimiko: What's going on?
Well, you see
I, uh
Came here to, uh
Take back the Shen Gong Wu.
What?
I challenge you to a
Xiaolin Showdown!
But I--
I wager the Shroud of Shadows.
And you?
Uh, I wager the Orb of Tornami.
The game is a test of skill,
follow the leader,
kung fu style.
Whoever falls first loses.
Agreed.
Let's go.
Xiaolin Showdown!
All: Gong yi tan pai!
Jumping tiger, hidden monkies!
Interesting, but
not so difficult.
Big deal. I could do
that if I wanted to.
You can't even tie your
shoelaces without instructions.
Try this one.
Bison stomping crane. Hyah!
Ha! Piece of pie!
Piece of cake.
Way to go, Omi!
Really nice move!
Rooster calling sun!
Wasp stinging flower.
Mosquito at rest.
Mosquito climbing tree.
Duck eating crackers.
Grasshopper doing dog paddle.
They have got to be
making this stuff up.
"Grasshopper doing dog paddle."
Right here in black and white.
Right next to "spider
doing hokey-pokey."
You have come far, little monk.
Far enough to win this showdown.
Really? Butterfly fools
moth on cypress tree.
Shroud of Shadows.
Whoa!
All: Look out!
Aah!
Moth not fooled.
Losing your nerve, little one?
No, but you are
losing the contest.
Tornado strike!
Ice!
Aah--aah--aah!
Ohh!
It appears you win.
Yes, it does.
You got to teach me duck
eatin' crackers sometime.
Again we meet,
and again we come to
no final solution.
Hey, Omi beat you
fair and square.
If you say so.
Thank you.
You all right, Omi?
Oh, yes. I am very much top tip.
I think you mean tip top.
Ok.
I was wondering.
Did I really win
or did he just let me win?
Why would Chase let you win?
Yeah. It's not like you
ever did anything for him.
Huh?
Xiaolin Showdown.
Xiaolin Showdown.
Clay: Dojo, can you
slow down just a mite?
Don't sweat it, cowboy.
This is China.
I know these mountains
like the back of my hand.
Kimiko: But you don't
have hands, Dojo.
Good point.
All: Aah!
Oh! My stomach. I think
I left it outside.
Incoming!
All: Aah!
Don't just stand there
picking your nose, you big oaf!
Keep throwing!
Aah!
Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Stuck with a one-eyed halfwit.
Oh! That was close.
I'd say it was more
than just close. Huh?
Well, looky there.
It's the Shen Gong Wu.
Rargh!
Time to kick ogre butt.
Typhoon boom! Wind!
Argh!
Unh! Seismic kick! Earth!
Argh! Ooh! Ow!
Hold it! Aah!
Oof! Ha ha ha!
Ha! Nice try, Jack Spicer,
but I believe the
Shen Gong Wu is mine.
Oh, give me a break!
I worked my fingers to the
bone to get here first
and I Wind up with bupkes. Aah!
Aah!
Oh! Aah!
Nice catch, Dojo!
What did you have for lunch?!
Jack's no threat anymore.
No Wuya, no Jackbots,
just a big one-eyed loser.
We kicked his butt.
The map of evil
may have changed,
but that does not mean there
is no longer any threat.
There is still Chase Young.
And now Wuya is with him.
That will only
make him stronger.
You may have beaten
Chase Young once,
but he was not defeated.
To eat rotten egg rolls
once is difficult.
To eat them twice
is another thing.
What does that mean?
Who knows? Just do what I do.
Smile and nod.
They all think they
have me beat, huh?
MonksLosers.
WuyaUgly loser.
Chase YoungWell,
he is kind of cool.
But I am Jack Spicer,
price of darkness,
and I have a plan. Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Oh, stop that!
You're not allowed to evil laugh
until you can do it neatly.
Wuya: You didn't even
bother to go after
the last 3 Shen Gong Wu.
I am not interested in
your little magical toys.
When I feel like it,
I'll get you some.
Right now I have more
important matters,
like delivering young
Omi to our evil ways.
I don't understand.
Why are you wasting your time
with that runt of a monk?
That is exactly the point.
You don't understand!
Kindly leave me to my plans.
Ah! Such command,
such authority.
Why, if I were 500 years
younger and had a body
Grr.
According to my tongue,
that by the way
has a coat harrier than
a woolly mammoth
The Wu shu visor is in sight.
Where? Somewhere in the sand.
That shouldn't be
so hard to find
In our lifetime.
Uh-oh! I think I spotted it.
Why "uh-oh?"
Because Chase Young
has spotted it first.
I believe that is ours!
I like your spunk, little one.
Care to try to take it from me?
Perhaps you would like to take
the Shen Gong Wu from me
with my back turned.
If there's one thing
I can't stand
it's a cocky evildoer.
All: Dragon x-kumei formation!
Hyah!
Mmm. Isn't he a work of art?
Hyah!
So, we meet again.
Uh, nice cats.
Yeah. Sure hope
they're well fed.
Monkey face!
Lizard eyes!
Rooster kick!
Leopard strike!
Rising snake!
Yaah!
Hyah!
You've learned well.
Now show me something
I don't know.
Say hello to my little friend.
Is this the best
you can do, Jack?
Aaaahhh! Aagghh!
The idea is adequate,
but the execution is lacking,
as are you.
Oh, yeah?
Well, I've got something
that you don't.
Very small hands?
No. The sphere of yun.
Hah!
Who's your evil bad dude now?
I'm bad. I'm bad.
I not only have Chase captured,
I have his powers, too.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Let me check.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. He's right!
The sphere of yun not only
traps its subject in a cage,
but gives its possessor control
of its possessees' possessions.
Cool. That's a mouthful.
Which means the jungle cats
are now in my control.
Hyah!
Here, kitty, kitties.
That's a good kitty.
Come to papa Jack.
Aah!
Don't bite off more than
you can chew, Spicer.
It may come back to bite you.
Oh? Oh, yeah?
So tell me,
who would you rather
be right now,
me or you? Ha ha ha!
Ba-a-ll!
I can't believe it.
Score one for the guy
with all the makeup.
Hmm?
Ahhh.
AhhhHa ha
Ohhh
AhhhAh.
Yeah.
I gotta hand it to you,
this is one fine crib,
and now it's my crib.
You should count
your good fortune
While it lasts.
Ooooohh!
I'm so scared.
I wasn't good enough
to work with you.
But you're not in
charge anymore,
Mr. high and dragon
mighty, are you?
I'm in charge.
Jack Spicer.
What you say?
Jack Spicer--
that's right!
Could you keep it down?
I think I'll get some sleep.
Where's your evil
super-genius now?
Asleep in a cage like a parrot.
Ha ha ha ha!
Oh, Jack,
you know you were
always my favorite.
AhhAhhAhhAhh--
yo, Einstein!
Saddle up!
It's time we spread some
of our evil fortune.
Ah ha ha ha ha ha!
Aah ha ha ha ha ha!
Aah ha ha ha ha!
Aaah ha ha ha!
All of the powers of Chase Young
and all the idiocy
of Jack Spicer
What a scary combination.
Maybe he will finally be satisfied
and quit his evil ways.
Oh!
If you are here to surrender,
you are most welcome.
Otherwise, prepare for defeat.
"Otherwise, prepare for defeat."
You're more fool
yourself than me.
Jungle cats, entertain
my little friends.
All: Dragon x-kumei formation!
Hyah!
Arrgh!
Ohh!
Cyclops, to the vault!
Huh? Hu-u-uh?
Aaah!
Ooh, the flying crane
hokaido masher move.
Ugh!
Master Fung, are you all right?
I am fine.
I am just not as young
as I used to be.
We must get to the
vault at once.
Uh
Ha ha ha. Ha ha.
Eeyuu.
Unh!
Arrggh!
Omi: Jack Spicer!
You got away from the cats
sooner than I expected.
That is because nobody expects the
flying crane hokaido masher move!
Anyway, it's been real, but we
got places to go and evil to do.
One-eyed freak, giddyap!
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!
Gee, it's not too bad.
Most of the Wu's still here.
Not too bad? It was a disaster.
I've got cat spit in places I
don't even like to think about.
Fighting Jack is one thing,
but those jungle
cats are too much!
We may never win
another Shen Gong Wu.
It was better when
Chase had the power.
At least he did not
go after the Wu.
What are you talking about?
He's the enemy, Omi.
I was simply talking out loud.
I meant nothing.
I must do this alone.
If I am wrong,
at least my friends will not
have to share in my mistake.
Golden Tiger Claws!
I didn't realize it
was visiting hours.
I--i have not come for a visit.
So why are you here?
To rescue you!
Reversing Mirror!
And now there's
something I must do.
Thank me?
Destroy you.
You really should be more
careful who you trust.
That seems only to be a
problem when I trust you.
Red ball Tsunami!
You learned well from
our last encounter.
Well, I was taught by the best.
Thank you.
I was speaking of Master Fung.
So have you reconsidered
my offer to join me?
No. I owed you a favor,
and now I have repaid it.
You may be closer than
you think to joining me
with that little white lie.
I do not lie!
Really?
You mean you didn't free me
for your own self-interest
to stop that nitwit Jack Spicer?
WellMaybeA little.
Isn't that what
evil is all about?
A lie here, a
little bad there
Suddenly it's so easy.
Dojo, what's wrong?
What in the wild Bob
west is going on?
It's round guy. He's gone!
Oh, no! Omi must've gone
to fight Jack on his own!
That little feller has more
pride than a dog has fleas.
We got to hurry.
Omi may need us.
Dismount!
Hey, hey, hey!
How's it going,
Mr. I-used-to-be- somebody-evil?
It goes well.
And you?
Better than you can say, loser.
Ha ha!
Has been, old evil relic,
old evil doo-doo head!
Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!
Ha haHa
Hey, hey, how'd you get
all the way over here
when I left you over there?
Please don't hurt me!
I'm frail and I bruise easily.
I was always with you, Chase.
At least in spirit.
There's one thing
I want to know.
Yes, anything.
Who would you rather
be right now?
You
Or me?
You.
Care to watch, Omi?
No!
This is my battle.
Return the Shen Gong Wu now
or suffer a humiliating defeat.
Oh, that's right.
Gang up on the weakling.
Stand back!
I have Wu and I'm not
afraid to use them.
Star Hanabi.
Tangle Web Comb!
Third arm Sash?
Waah! Waah! Ooh! Aah!
Don't just stand
there, you big oaf!
Get him!
Much obliged, though I
had it under control.
Those are my stolen
Shen Gong Wu.
I'm going to blast you
into next Saturday.
Hey, how did Chase get out?
Kimiko: What's going on?
Well, you see
I, uh
Came here to, uh
Take back the Shen Gong Wu.
What?
I challenge you to a
Xiaolin Showdown!
But I--
I wager the Shroud of Shadows.
And you?
Uh, I wager the Orb of Tornami.
The game is a test of skill,
follow the leader,
kung fu style.
Whoever falls first loses.
Agreed.
Let's go.
Xiaolin Showdown!
All: Gong yi tan pai!
Jumping tiger, hidden monkies!
Interesting, but
not so difficult.
Big deal. I could do
that if I wanted to.
You can't even tie your
shoelaces without instructions.
Try this one.
Bison stomping crane. Hyah!
Ha! Piece of pie!
Piece of cake.
Way to go, Omi!
Really nice move!
Rooster calling sun!
Wasp stinging flower.
Mosquito at rest.
Mosquito climbing tree.
Duck eating crackers.
Grasshopper doing dog paddle.
They have got to be
making this stuff up.
"Grasshopper doing dog paddle."
Right here in black and white.
Right next to "spider
doing hokey-pokey."
You have come far, little monk.
Far enough to win this showdown.
Really? Butterfly fools
moth on cypress tree.
Shroud of Shadows.
Whoa!
All: Look out!
Aah!
Moth not fooled.
Losing your nerve, little one?
No, but you are
losing the contest.
Tornado strike!
Ice!
Aah--aah--aah!
Ohh!
It appears you win.
Yes, it does.
You got to teach me duck
eatin' crackers sometime.
Again we meet,
and again we come to
no final solution.
Hey, Omi beat you
fair and square.
If you say so.
Thank you.
You all right, Omi?
Oh, yes. I am very much top tip.
I think you mean tip top.
Ok.
I was wondering.
Did I really win
or did he just let me win?
Why would Chase let you win?
Yeah. It's not like you
ever did anything for him.
Huh?