Clarence US (2014) s02e26 Episode Script
Bucky and the Howl
1 [remote clicks.]
[upbeat music plays.]
I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! [Native vocals singing.]
Ms.
Baker: "But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the East, and Juliet is the sun.
" - [Knock on door.]
Uh - Knock, knock! Oh, right the thing.
Come on in! Okay, everyone, please give your attention to Mr.
Jones.
He's got a very special announcement.
Hey, there! Today after school, we're performing the school musical, "Bucky and the Howl"! - We have a musical? - We have an amazing group who've been working hard for the past two weeks, including a lot of your brilliant classmates.
What?! Really?! [Murmuring.]
Who would ever want to be in a play? That's so lame.
So, if anyone wants to join our production, come by at recess, lunch, or whenever! Uh we've got doughnuts.
Oh, my gosh! I love doughnuts! Aren't you guys excited to see the fun play? Come on.
I'm sure last year's was great.
Right? - Did anyone see it? - I didn't see it.
Sorry.
Okay.
So, we'll see you after school in the gymatorium! Okay, Nathan.
We practiced this with Sumo, but we can't find him right now.
But you're pretty much a bigger Sumo, so we'll be great.
All right, four-legged racers.
On your four-legged marks get four-legged set go! [Grunting.]
Nathan! - Nathan, stop it! - We can't get up! Stop! This is supposed to be a team-building exercise! [Clarence and Jeff groaning.]
[Group cheering.]
Aw! Sorry, guys.
I biffed it.
That's okay.
You're always a champion in my eyes.
Thanks, man.
I really needed that.
When you asked me to fill in for Sumo, I got a little nervous, because Hmm.
That's a good point.
Where is Sumo, anyhow? haven't been getting a lot of support at home so I'm kind of on edge today Sumo? Hmm? Wrong shoes.
Wrong shoes.
Sumo! Oh.
He didn't even stop by to eat his afternoon trash breadsticks.
- Sumo! - Sumo! Sumo! [Mid-tempo music plays.]
Where are you, Sumo? - Echoooo! - Huh? - Ooh.
- Hmm.
Where, oh, where could that darn coyote be? [Howls.]
Oh, my goodness! [Growls.]
I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow Click, click.
Hee-haw, Bucky.
Looks like you've reached the end.
Wait! The firework be-gifted to me by the friendly native! I'm saved! Aah! [Dramatic music plays.]
[Gasps.]
Oh, no! Okay, Sumo.
Remember the script.
[Growls.]
Aah! [Growling.]
[Cloth ripping.]
[Gasps.]
[Growls.]
Aah! [Growling.]
This is great.
This is great! Awooooooooo! [Jeff and Clarence laughing.]
Bravo! [Trance-like music plays.]
Aw, man.
I can't believe you guys saw me.
Uh, look, guys, can you not tell anyone? Please? Well, I thought you looked pretty good up there.
Yeah, Sumo.
I never knew you could do that.
- So you don't think I'm lame? - No way! You were all like, "Rawr! I'm a coyote!" [Howls.]
Uhp! [Chuckles.]
Well, thanks for not making fun of me, guys.
It's actually kind of fun.
Mr.
Jones lets me do all kinds of crazy stuff.
So how come you're so embarrassed? Well, 'cause everybody except you guys thinks plays are lame.
I'm just happy nobody's gonna come to this play - and see me being all lame.
- Ah! Sumo! That last run-through was truly inspired.
Although I think you may have scared off our Bucky O'Neil.
Un pro fessional! [Grunts.]
I quit! Besides Rita, you're the only true tour de force up there.
- Jeff, you should join the play.
- [Coughs.]
W-What?! Just think about it, Jeff.
Imagine you Oh, what the heck? I'll give it a try.
How about some simple "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star"? [Music plays.]
[Wheezing.]
Jeff, are you okay? It's fine.
I just I'm a baritone.
Could you go down an octave? [Music plays in lower key.]
[Muffled.]
It's too fast.
Slower.
[Tempo slows.]
[Whispering.]
Slower.
[Single note plays.]
[Rapid footsteps.]
[Grunting.]
Clarence! [Off-key.]
# Bucky and the Howl # One's a coyote and the other one's a man Coyote's comin' after you Yeah, he'll kick your little butt Cha! [Cheering.]
Ladies and gentlemen, we have found our Bucky! Mr.
Jones: We put our hearts into it, that merry band of misfits.
We thirsted for art, for admiration.
We lived for the curtain - Um who are you talking to? - For my memoirs.
Okay, everybody! Let's try the fireworks scene! And, Sumo, you're doing great! Has someone let a wild coyote onstage? [Chuckles.]
But just for fun, let's try it as written this time - and let Clarence set off the firework.
- Aw, come on! A real coyote would never get scared by a dumb old firecracker! Noted.
But in the interest of not losing another Bucky, let's just try it this way.
Oh, fine.
No one's gonna see this play anyway.
[Keyboard plays.]
# I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl # 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow [Stilted.]
Well, Bucky, old pal, looks like we're probably gonna be um dead now.
Um rawr! Wait! The fireworks from before in the play! - I'm saved! - Oh, no.
Come on, Sumo.
Give me something.
Yeah, but I don't feel scared.
Then dig down and find me something else.
Raa-a-a-wr ohh Dig deeper.
Go for it! Raaaaaaawr! [Laughing maniacally.]
[Laughing continues.]
[Howls.]
Brilliant! I don't understand it, and it's perfect! Good job, Sumo! This is gonna be great.
Oh, I can't wait for all our friends to see.
No! You can't tell anyone about it, remember? But you're doing so good.
Everyone's gonna love you.
Nobody's gonna nothin' me, 'cause nobody's gonna see me, 'cause you're not gonna say anything, right? Don't worry, Sumo.
I'll keep your little secret.
[Murmuring.]
Super special secret surprise mystery guest today only at the play! Here ya go.
Here! Come see me in the play.
Starting in 10 minutes, though, so you better hurry up.
Hey, are you coming to the play? You bet you are.
[Breathing deeply.]
- Jeff! Play! Now! Here! - Oh.
Okay.
Sumo: Clarence, you told! - [Voice cracks.]
Everyone's here! - It's not everyone.
It's just Chelsea, Mavis Belson, Gilben, Julien, Guyler, Malessica Marley, Ashley [Vomiting.]
Dunkin, Ms.
Baker, Amy Sumo? W-Wha? - What do you mean he's gone? - He got all weirder out.
[Sighs.]
It's always the most talented that contain the most fire.
- What are we gonna do? - One of you is gonna have to fill in! But we can't do this without Sumo.
Listen to me.
It's up to you now.
The show must go on! [Excited murmuring.]
[Static.]
Okay.
Cue curtain.
Cue lights.
Patsie: Hey, watch it! [Native vocals singing.]
Sumo: You imbecile! Everyone knows you're in the play.
[Singsong.]
You're in the stupid play! You're so lame.
Look! What a lame-o.
You're in the play! [Laughter.]
[Grunting, panting.]
[Breathing shakily.]
Aaaaaaaah!! [Vocals stop.]
[Crying.]
Sumo? W-What are you doing here? Isn't the play happening right now? N-No way.
Everyone's gonna make fun of me.
Make fun of you?! Sumo, you're the best coyote there is! Now, show me! Make me scared! Be a hunter! [Exhales sharply.]
Ohh, I can't do it.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
Look at me.
I'm just a little bunny, just hopping around.
Who's gonna catch the bunny? Look at my little tail.
I don't think you can catch my tail, Mr.
Co-yo-te.
Huh? That's what I'm scared of.
But I don't see one of those around, do I? [Chuckling.]
Oh! - I'm a little bunny, just hopping around - Come on, Jeff.
Stop it! - Stupid bunny! Jeff! - Who's gonna catch the bunny? Ooh-oo-ooh! [Growls.]
Where's that darn coyote at? [High-pitched.]
I'm hiding behind a rock.
I can't find him, even though I am looking for him.
Hee, hee, hee! Coyotes are the best! - [Audience booing.]
What is happening? - What the biff?! This is more audience participation than we've had in years! A prodigy of the stage! [Doors burst open.]
Yaaaaaaaaah! - Huh? - Oh, uh naked? - Uhh - Bold costume choice.
[Growls.]
[Giggles.]
Scary puppy! [Growls.]
I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl [Mid-tempo music plays.]
# 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow # [Howls.]
[Cheering.]
Ow-ow-awooooooooo! [Crowd howling.]
But wait! It's the firework from before in the play! - I'm saved! - Oh! Yes, yes, yes, yes! [Giggling.]
Rawr! [Grunts.]
Yah! [Cheering.]
[Cheering continues.]
Percy: Sumo! Sumo! Sumo! [Laughing maniacally.]
[Audience chanting.]
Sumo! Sumo! [Giggles.]
[Giggling.]
Bravo.
Oh, bravo.
[Chanting continues.]
Sumo! Sumo! Sumo! Wo-o-o-w! Way to go, Sumo! [Chanting continues.]
We danced with defeat this day, and we were the victors.
Bravo.
[Creak.]
[Screams, groans.]
[upbeat music plays.]
I don't care what you say! I'm gonna do what I want all day! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! I'm the king of the world! [Native vocals singing.]
Ms.
Baker: "But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the East, and Juliet is the sun.
" - [Knock on door.]
Uh - Knock, knock! Oh, right the thing.
Come on in! Okay, everyone, please give your attention to Mr.
Jones.
He's got a very special announcement.
Hey, there! Today after school, we're performing the school musical, "Bucky and the Howl"! - We have a musical? - We have an amazing group who've been working hard for the past two weeks, including a lot of your brilliant classmates.
What?! Really?! [Murmuring.]
Who would ever want to be in a play? That's so lame.
So, if anyone wants to join our production, come by at recess, lunch, or whenever! Uh we've got doughnuts.
Oh, my gosh! I love doughnuts! Aren't you guys excited to see the fun play? Come on.
I'm sure last year's was great.
Right? - Did anyone see it? - I didn't see it.
Sorry.
Okay.
So, we'll see you after school in the gymatorium! Okay, Nathan.
We practiced this with Sumo, but we can't find him right now.
But you're pretty much a bigger Sumo, so we'll be great.
All right, four-legged racers.
On your four-legged marks get four-legged set go! [Grunting.]
Nathan! - Nathan, stop it! - We can't get up! Stop! This is supposed to be a team-building exercise! [Clarence and Jeff groaning.]
[Group cheering.]
Aw! Sorry, guys.
I biffed it.
That's okay.
You're always a champion in my eyes.
Thanks, man.
I really needed that.
When you asked me to fill in for Sumo, I got a little nervous, because Hmm.
That's a good point.
Where is Sumo, anyhow? haven't been getting a lot of support at home so I'm kind of on edge today Sumo? Hmm? Wrong shoes.
Wrong shoes.
Sumo! Oh.
He didn't even stop by to eat his afternoon trash breadsticks.
- Sumo! - Sumo! Sumo! [Mid-tempo music plays.]
Where are you, Sumo? - Echoooo! - Huh? - Ooh.
- Hmm.
Where, oh, where could that darn coyote be? [Howls.]
Oh, my goodness! [Growls.]
I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow Click, click.
Hee-haw, Bucky.
Looks like you've reached the end.
Wait! The firework be-gifted to me by the friendly native! I'm saved! Aah! [Dramatic music plays.]
[Gasps.]
Oh, no! Okay, Sumo.
Remember the script.
[Growls.]
Aah! [Growling.]
[Cloth ripping.]
[Gasps.]
[Growls.]
Aah! [Growling.]
This is great.
This is great! Awooooooooo! [Jeff and Clarence laughing.]
Bravo! [Trance-like music plays.]
Aw, man.
I can't believe you guys saw me.
Uh, look, guys, can you not tell anyone? Please? Well, I thought you looked pretty good up there.
Yeah, Sumo.
I never knew you could do that.
- So you don't think I'm lame? - No way! You were all like, "Rawr! I'm a coyote!" [Howls.]
Uhp! [Chuckles.]
Well, thanks for not making fun of me, guys.
It's actually kind of fun.
Mr.
Jones lets me do all kinds of crazy stuff.
So how come you're so embarrassed? Well, 'cause everybody except you guys thinks plays are lame.
I'm just happy nobody's gonna come to this play - and see me being all lame.
- Ah! Sumo! That last run-through was truly inspired.
Although I think you may have scared off our Bucky O'Neil.
Un pro fessional! [Grunts.]
I quit! Besides Rita, you're the only true tour de force up there.
- Jeff, you should join the play.
- [Coughs.]
W-What?! Just think about it, Jeff.
Imagine you Oh, what the heck? I'll give it a try.
How about some simple "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star"? [Music plays.]
[Wheezing.]
Jeff, are you okay? It's fine.
I just I'm a baritone.
Could you go down an octave? [Music plays in lower key.]
[Muffled.]
It's too fast.
Slower.
[Tempo slows.]
[Whispering.]
Slower.
[Single note plays.]
[Rapid footsteps.]
[Grunting.]
Clarence! [Off-key.]
# Bucky and the Howl # One's a coyote and the other one's a man Coyote's comin' after you Yeah, he'll kick your little butt Cha! [Cheering.]
Ladies and gentlemen, we have found our Bucky! Mr.
Jones: We put our hearts into it, that merry band of misfits.
We thirsted for art, for admiration.
We lived for the curtain - Um who are you talking to? - For my memoirs.
Okay, everybody! Let's try the fireworks scene! And, Sumo, you're doing great! Has someone let a wild coyote onstage? [Chuckles.]
But just for fun, let's try it as written this time - and let Clarence set off the firework.
- Aw, come on! A real coyote would never get scared by a dumb old firecracker! Noted.
But in the interest of not losing another Bucky, let's just try it this way.
Oh, fine.
No one's gonna see this play anyway.
[Keyboard plays.]
# I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl # 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow [Stilted.]
Well, Bucky, old pal, looks like we're probably gonna be um dead now.
Um rawr! Wait! The fireworks from before in the play! - I'm saved! - Oh, no.
Come on, Sumo.
Give me something.
Yeah, but I don't feel scared.
Then dig down and find me something else.
Raa-a-a-wr ohh Dig deeper.
Go for it! Raaaaaaawr! [Laughing maniacally.]
[Laughing continues.]
[Howls.]
Brilliant! I don't understand it, and it's perfect! Good job, Sumo! This is gonna be great.
Oh, I can't wait for all our friends to see.
No! You can't tell anyone about it, remember? But you're doing so good.
Everyone's gonna love you.
Nobody's gonna nothin' me, 'cause nobody's gonna see me, 'cause you're not gonna say anything, right? Don't worry, Sumo.
I'll keep your little secret.
[Murmuring.]
Super special secret surprise mystery guest today only at the play! Here ya go.
Here! Come see me in the play.
Starting in 10 minutes, though, so you better hurry up.
Hey, are you coming to the play? You bet you are.
[Breathing deeply.]
- Jeff! Play! Now! Here! - Oh.
Okay.
Sumo: Clarence, you told! - [Voice cracks.]
Everyone's here! - It's not everyone.
It's just Chelsea, Mavis Belson, Gilben, Julien, Guyler, Malessica Marley, Ashley [Vomiting.]
Dunkin, Ms.
Baker, Amy Sumo? W-Wha? - What do you mean he's gone? - He got all weirder out.
[Sighs.]
It's always the most talented that contain the most fire.
- What are we gonna do? - One of you is gonna have to fill in! But we can't do this without Sumo.
Listen to me.
It's up to you now.
The show must go on! [Excited murmuring.]
[Static.]
Okay.
Cue curtain.
Cue lights.
Patsie: Hey, watch it! [Native vocals singing.]
Sumo: You imbecile! Everyone knows you're in the play.
[Singsong.]
You're in the stupid play! You're so lame.
Look! What a lame-o.
You're in the play! [Laughter.]
[Grunting, panting.]
[Breathing shakily.]
Aaaaaaaah!! [Vocals stop.]
[Crying.]
Sumo? W-What are you doing here? Isn't the play happening right now? N-No way.
Everyone's gonna make fun of me.
Make fun of you?! Sumo, you're the best coyote there is! Now, show me! Make me scared! Be a hunter! [Exhales sharply.]
Ohh, I can't do it.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
Look at me.
I'm just a little bunny, just hopping around.
Who's gonna catch the bunny? Look at my little tail.
I don't think you can catch my tail, Mr.
Co-yo-te.
Huh? That's what I'm scared of.
But I don't see one of those around, do I? [Chuckling.]
Oh! - I'm a little bunny, just hopping around - Come on, Jeff.
Stop it! - Stupid bunny! Jeff! - Who's gonna catch the bunny? Ooh-oo-ooh! [Growls.]
Where's that darn coyote at? [High-pitched.]
I'm hiding behind a rock.
I can't find him, even though I am looking for him.
Hee, hee, hee! Coyotes are the best! - [Audience booing.]
What is happening? - What the biff?! This is more audience participation than we've had in years! A prodigy of the stage! [Doors burst open.]
Yaaaaaaaaah! - Huh? - Oh, uh naked? - Uhh - Bold costume choice.
[Growls.]
[Giggles.]
Scary puppy! [Growls.]
I'm a hungry coyote, hear me growl [Mid-tempo music plays.]
# 'Cause it's eating time and I found me some chow # [Howls.]
[Cheering.]
Ow-ow-awooooooooo! [Crowd howling.]
But wait! It's the firework from before in the play! - I'm saved! - Oh! Yes, yes, yes, yes! [Giggling.]
Rawr! [Grunts.]
Yah! [Cheering.]
[Cheering continues.]
Percy: Sumo! Sumo! Sumo! [Laughing maniacally.]
[Audience chanting.]
Sumo! Sumo! [Giggles.]
[Giggling.]
Bravo.
Oh, bravo.
[Chanting continues.]
Sumo! Sumo! Sumo! Wo-o-o-w! Way to go, Sumo! [Chanting continues.]
We danced with defeat this day, and we were the victors.
Bravo.
[Creak.]
[Screams, groans.]