Austin and Ally s03e01 Episode Script
Road Trips & Reunions
Guess who's back from Austin's first big tour? Oh, Trish, Dez! Oh my goodness.
I brought you a souvenir.
An actual Philly Cheese Steak from Philadelphia.
Is that mold? It was from our first stop two months ago.
Yeah, I have this thing about not eating food that'll make me sick.
More for me.
So how's your album coming along? Well, I have six songs recorded.
But for some reason I can't finish writing any new ones.
I've just been distracted thinking about Ally? Austin.
Ally? What? I was just showing the delivery guy a new dance move.
You're doing great, Frank.
I'm worried about you, Sweetie.
Every time I come down here you're twirling someone.
What can I say? I love dancing.
Austin's gonna be gone on tour for another month.
Are you sure you'll be able to last that long? Dad, I'm having enough trouble trying to finish these songs.
Austin is the furthest thing from my mind.
Somebody order a pizza? I'm here for my Sousaphone lesson.
What are you looking at? Okay.
Maybe I miss Austin a little.
Yes, honey.
Yes, you do.
When the crowd wants more, I bring on the thunder.
'Cause you've got my back, and I'm not going under.
You're my point, you're my guard.
You're the perfect chord.
And I see our names together on every billboard.
We're headed for the top, we've got it on lock.
We'll make 'em say "hey!" And we'll keep rockin'.
Oh, there's no way I could make it without ya.
Do it without ya, be here without ya.
It's no fun when you're doing it solo.
With you it's like, "whoa".
Yeah, and I know.
I own this dream.
'Cause I got you with me.
There's no way I could make it without ya.
Do it without ya, be here without ya.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Been counting every second of the day.
I'm dying to be seeing your face.
Wishing you were at the door.
Can't take another minute more.
Some way and somehow.
I'm through Anticipating.
Anticipating.
Oh-oh.
Right here and right now.
It's true.
Instead of waiting.
Instead of waiting.
Oh! I'm going home and I'm coming to you.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Heading for all that I knew.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Together again.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Oh.
So can you heart it? C-can you hear it? It's beating out of me.
Oh oh oh.
Can you hear it? Hey, hey, can you hear it? It's where I want to be.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Yeah.
You and I.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Together again.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
Chasing the beat of my heart! Good night, Chicago! Ally, you're here.
He's doing it again.
Wow.
He must really miss Ally.
Or he just really likes security guards.
Yeah, it's probably the Ally thing.
Congratulations.
You each purchased a V.
I.
P.
autograph and photo session with Austin Moon.
Everybody's gonna get a turn.
So when he gets here let's all behave in a nice orderly fashion.
Whoa.
Ow! Hey! - Whoa! - Guys! I got his sock! I got his sock! Mine.
I need that.
Okay.
Everybody drop the clothes.
Get off the bus.
Let's go.
Give me this.
- Not you, Dez.
- Oh.
If we're gonna keep doing these meet and greets, I'm gonna need to wear more clothes.
Hey, it's Ally.
Hey, everybody.
- Hi, Ally.
- I miss you.
How was Chicago? Amazing.
All three nights sold out.
I ate an entire deep dish pizza on the top of the Sears Tower.
And I got to watch Dez throw up an entire deep dish pizza off the top of the Sears Tower.
Well, I had a pretty exciting weekend too.
You know that yellow top I got for my birthday? The cross-back knit sleeveless v-neck? Uh Yeah.
Anyway, I spilled some jelly on it.
I thought I would never get that stain out.
But get this, I took some tonic water, mixed it with baking soda and I just realized my weekend wasn't as exciting as yours.
Clearly.
Finish the story.
What happened? I got the stain out.
Yes! Great story.
Tell it again.
Dez.
Ally, I'm only gonna be on tour for a few more weeks.
Maybe it's time for you to use that thing.
What thing? The thing I put in the card I gave her.
The thing that you put in the card that you gave her? Guys, Austin gave me a plane ticket to anywhere so that I could meet up with you wherever you are on tour.
How romantic.
Ally, you have to come meet us.
But I still have all these songs that I'm having trouble finishing.
Maybe you need a few days off.
I'm not sure.
- Do it! Do it! - Come on.
Please, please? You know what? I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna join you guys on tour.
- All right! - Yes! I just have to be back by Monday.
I have a meeting with Ronnie Ramone.
So where's your next stop? Uh, Portland.
Okay then.
I'll see you guys tomorrow in Portland.
I can't wait to hear the stain story in person.
Ally, where are you? I just got off the plane.
Where are you guys? Uh, we're by gate 27.
Me too.
I don't see you.
Like your song.
We're at the airport.
But you don't see me.
You got off the plane.
But you don't see me.
I Stop it.
I don't get it.
How can we be at the same gate in the same airport and not see each other? Because maybe we're not at the same airport? Which Portland are you in? Portland, Oregon.
I'm in Portland, Maine.
There are two Portlands? Why would they do that? I don't know why they do that or who "they" are.
But now I'm 3,000 miles away from you.
That's why she doesn't see us.
She's in the wrong state.
So she don't see me So she don't see me Thanks.
So I guess I can catch the next flight into Washington.
That gets in at 9:00 in the morning.
We'll still get to spend two full days together.
Well, two days are better than nothing.
Wait, do you have enough money for a ticket? Because we don't have a way to get you any cash before the flight.
Yeah, my dad gave me some emergency funds.
- See you guys tomorrow.
- Bye.
Eight dollars and a coupon for a free car wash? And it's expired.
Guess I'll have to raise the money myself.
I've been wishing for Something missing.
To fill this empty space.
To fill this empty space.
To show the person behind the curtain.
To show the person behind the curtain.
So you'll understand Who I really am.
Who I really am.
The me that you don't see.
Is praying there's a chance, you still believe.
Tell me that I'm worth it.
I'll prove that I deserve it.
And I can be.
And I can be.
The me that you don't see.
Is praying there's a chance, you still believe.
Tell me that I'm worth it.
I'll prove that I deserve it.
And I can be.
And I can be.
The me that you don't see The me that you don't see I would have asked to borrow it, but you just looked so peaceful sleeping.
You're a lot less peaceful when you're awake.
Okay, if I roll a three that means I win.
Come on, three.
Let's see that three.
Give me a three.
Give me a three.
Will you just roll the dice already? Three.
It's a three! Oops.
I accidentally knocked over the board.
Now we'll never know who won.
That's fine with me.
Not everything in life is a competition.
Ha! Beat you.
I win.
Ha! Beat you again.
Seriously? Come on.
How cool is it that we're on the same bathroom schedule? So cool.
I'm gonna go use the bathroom in the rest stop.
Here.
Thanks for letting me use your toothbrush.
I didn't say you could use my toothbrush.
I said tooth paste.
Pfft! I know.
I was just kidding.
Here's your toothbrush that I didn't use.
Hmm.
It's Ally.
Hello? What do you mean you missed your plane? Are you serious? She missed the plane? Aw, come on.
Surprise! Ally, what are you doing here? I thought we were gonna pick you up from the airport? My plane landed early and I wanted to surprise you guys.
- Dez! - Don't sneak up on people like that.
What were you thinking? You scared the heck out of me.
Anyway.
Ally, I missed you.
- Where's Austin? - He's still asleep.
Let's go sneak up on him and scare the heck out of him.
Surprise! I know.
Surpri He's not in here either.
Remind me to lock the door when I use the bathroom on the bus.
Yeah.
If Austin isn't here, then where is he? I can't believe Austin Moon is actually on our bus.
I must have gotten on your bus by mistake last night.
- Where are we? - How would I know? I'm a little girl.
But we've been driving all night since we left that rest stop.
Seriously? No, you need to turn around.
You need to take me back to Washington.
We can't.
We're on our way to the Buttercup Jamboree.
I can't believe I'm trapped on a bus with a bunch of screaming Buttercups.
I know! Nobody's seen him.
I looked everywhere.
He's not here.
So he just left his phone on the bus and disappeared? - Found 'em.
- Where is he? Austin? I have no idea where he is.
I found Crunchkins! The crunchiest cheese puffs in the world.
They sell them at the vending machine here.
I got two bags.
Hey, this is Austin Moon.
You've reached Hilary B.
's phone.
Leave a message.
Bam.
Hey, this is Austin Moon.
You've reached Hilary H.
's phone.
Leave a message.
Bam.
Okay.
That's everyone's outgoing message.
Now can I please use your phone to call one of my friends? - I can't believe Austin Moon - I know what you're gonna say.
You can't believe Austin Moon is gonna use your phone.
I can't believe Austin Moon knew what I was gonna say.
Oh.
Hello? Austin? You're where? You're gonna what? I can't here you.
Dez, please stop crunching.
Go ahead, Austin.
Yes.
Dez finally found Crunchkins.
What's going on? Yeah, so now we're in Idaho.
And they're gonna drop me off at the nearest airport.
Hopefully I won't have to wait too long to catch the next flight.
I can't wait to see you.
I can't wait to see you too.
I'm just bummed that now we only have one day to spend together.
Hey, cheer up.
A whole day is better than two half days.
Actually, two half days are the same as Never mind.
Well, I'll see you in Washington.
I'll be there.
I just have to finish making I don't see him.
You don't think he missed his flight? - Found 'em.
- Where is he? Huh? Oh, not Austin.
Flame O's.
The world's hottest cheese puffs.
You can only get these in airports.
Mmm.
Hot hot! - Austin? - Hot hot hot hot! Dez, shh.
Go ahead, Austin.
Yes, Dez finally found Flame O's.
Where are you? I just got off the plane.
Where are you guys? We're by the arrival gate.
I don't see you.
You're in Washington D.
C.
, aren't you? Yeah.
Why? We're in Washington State.
There are two Washingtons? Why do they keep doing that? I can't believe we're This stinks.
By the time you get here, we'll only have a half hour together.
Well, I don't care how much time we have.
I just want to see you.
I just want to see you too.
You know who else wants to see you? tickets for tonight's concert.
You better be on the next flight.
You're supposed to be on stage in eight hours.
I'll be there in six.
Okay, bye.
Don't worry, Ally.
He'll make it.
Oh sorry.
I'll get it.
It's coming right out.
Austin Austin Austin! Austin Austin Austin! He was supposed to be on stage 20 minutes ago.
- This isn't good.
- My plane is gonna take off soon.
I can't believe I'm not gonna see him.
I found 'em.
Little Golden Toes.
Nobody cares about your dumb snacks.
No, I found Austin.
I always call him Little Golden Toes.
Ally! Austin.
- I missed you.
- I missed you too.
I hate to break this up, but Little Golden Toes needs to get on stage.
Hey, only Dez can call me that.
I am so glad you're here.
I'll see you after the show? Austin, I can't.
You got here so late, I have to leave before the show is over.
Oh.
After all we went through to get together and that's it? I guess this is goodbye.
Seattle, are you ready to rock?! Sorry Seattle, uh Just give me one second.
Ally, please stay.
Oh.
Austin, I wish I could.
I have that meeting with Ronnie Ramone tomorrow.
I know.
I just thought I'd give it a shot.
It's just that everything's better with you.
My singing's better.
My dancing's better.
My everything's better.
I know.
And I write better when you're around.
Yeah.
We make a good team.
Sorry.
I Should get back.
Seattle, are you ready to do this? Um My bad, Seattle.
Um, just give me a second.
Last time, I promise.
Okay.
I finally realized why I've had so much trouble finishing songs.
I need somebody to bounce my ideas off of.
I need inspiration.
I need you.
That means a lot.
- I'm gonna miss you.
- Wait wait.
I was thinking What's the point of going to a meeting with a bunch of unfinished songs? Wouldn't it make more sense to reschedule the meeting and go in with finished songs? Yeah.
It makes sense to me.
Well, see you.
Wait, no! Austin.
I want you to help me finish the songs.
I'm gonna stay with you for the rest of the tour.
Yes! Austin Austin Austin! I hate to break this up again, but Right.
I'm so happy you're gonna stay with us.
Me too.
Oh.
Sorry.
It gets out.
Guys, I'm so glad Ally's going to spend the rest of the tour with us.
The next few weeks are going to be so much fun.
Yeah Let's go wake her up and scare the heck out of her.
Okay shh, shh, shh - Shh! - Shh! Shh! Surprise! I can't believe I'm actually on Austin Moon's tour bus! Uh, where's Ally? You've got to be kidding me.
I brought you a souvenir.
An actual Philly Cheese Steak from Philadelphia.
Is that mold? It was from our first stop two months ago.
Yeah, I have this thing about not eating food that'll make me sick.
More for me.
So how's your album coming along? Well, I have six songs recorded.
But for some reason I can't finish writing any new ones.
I've just been distracted thinking about Ally? Austin.
Ally? What? I was just showing the delivery guy a new dance move.
You're doing great, Frank.
I'm worried about you, Sweetie.
Every time I come down here you're twirling someone.
What can I say? I love dancing.
Austin's gonna be gone on tour for another month.
Are you sure you'll be able to last that long? Dad, I'm having enough trouble trying to finish these songs.
Austin is the furthest thing from my mind.
Somebody order a pizza? I'm here for my Sousaphone lesson.
What are you looking at? Okay.
Maybe I miss Austin a little.
Yes, honey.
Yes, you do.
When the crowd wants more, I bring on the thunder.
'Cause you've got my back, and I'm not going under.
You're my point, you're my guard.
You're the perfect chord.
And I see our names together on every billboard.
We're headed for the top, we've got it on lock.
We'll make 'em say "hey!" And we'll keep rockin'.
Oh, there's no way I could make it without ya.
Do it without ya, be here without ya.
It's no fun when you're doing it solo.
With you it's like, "whoa".
Yeah, and I know.
I own this dream.
'Cause I got you with me.
There's no way I could make it without ya.
Do it without ya, be here without ya.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Been counting every second of the day.
I'm dying to be seeing your face.
Wishing you were at the door.
Can't take another minute more.
Some way and somehow.
I'm through Anticipating.
Anticipating.
Oh-oh.
Right here and right now.
It's true.
Instead of waiting.
Instead of waiting.
Oh! I'm going home and I'm coming to you.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Heading for all that I knew.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Together again.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
Chasing the beat of my heart.
Oh.
So can you heart it? C-can you hear it? It's beating out of me.
Oh oh oh.
Can you hear it? Hey, hey, can you hear it? It's where I want to be.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Yeah.
You and I.
- Oh-ohh-whoa.
- Together again.
Oh-ohh-whoa.
You and I.
Chasing the beat of my heart! Good night, Chicago! Ally, you're here.
He's doing it again.
Wow.
He must really miss Ally.
Or he just really likes security guards.
Yeah, it's probably the Ally thing.
Congratulations.
You each purchased a V.
I.
P.
autograph and photo session with Austin Moon.
Everybody's gonna get a turn.
So when he gets here let's all behave in a nice orderly fashion.
Whoa.
Ow! Hey! - Whoa! - Guys! I got his sock! I got his sock! Mine.
I need that.
Okay.
Everybody drop the clothes.
Get off the bus.
Let's go.
Give me this.
- Not you, Dez.
- Oh.
If we're gonna keep doing these meet and greets, I'm gonna need to wear more clothes.
Hey, it's Ally.
Hey, everybody.
- Hi, Ally.
- I miss you.
How was Chicago? Amazing.
All three nights sold out.
I ate an entire deep dish pizza on the top of the Sears Tower.
And I got to watch Dez throw up an entire deep dish pizza off the top of the Sears Tower.
Well, I had a pretty exciting weekend too.
You know that yellow top I got for my birthday? The cross-back knit sleeveless v-neck? Uh Yeah.
Anyway, I spilled some jelly on it.
I thought I would never get that stain out.
But get this, I took some tonic water, mixed it with baking soda and I just realized my weekend wasn't as exciting as yours.
Clearly.
Finish the story.
What happened? I got the stain out.
Yes! Great story.
Tell it again.
Dez.
Ally, I'm only gonna be on tour for a few more weeks.
Maybe it's time for you to use that thing.
What thing? The thing I put in the card I gave her.
The thing that you put in the card that you gave her? Guys, Austin gave me a plane ticket to anywhere so that I could meet up with you wherever you are on tour.
How romantic.
Ally, you have to come meet us.
But I still have all these songs that I'm having trouble finishing.
Maybe you need a few days off.
I'm not sure.
- Do it! Do it! - Come on.
Please, please? You know what? I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna join you guys on tour.
- All right! - Yes! I just have to be back by Monday.
I have a meeting with Ronnie Ramone.
So where's your next stop? Uh, Portland.
Okay then.
I'll see you guys tomorrow in Portland.
I can't wait to hear the stain story in person.
Ally, where are you? I just got off the plane.
Where are you guys? Uh, we're by gate 27.
Me too.
I don't see you.
Like your song.
We're at the airport.
But you don't see me.
You got off the plane.
But you don't see me.
I Stop it.
I don't get it.
How can we be at the same gate in the same airport and not see each other? Because maybe we're not at the same airport? Which Portland are you in? Portland, Oregon.
I'm in Portland, Maine.
There are two Portlands? Why would they do that? I don't know why they do that or who "they" are.
But now I'm 3,000 miles away from you.
That's why she doesn't see us.
She's in the wrong state.
So she don't see me So she don't see me Thanks.
So I guess I can catch the next flight into Washington.
That gets in at 9:00 in the morning.
We'll still get to spend two full days together.
Well, two days are better than nothing.
Wait, do you have enough money for a ticket? Because we don't have a way to get you any cash before the flight.
Yeah, my dad gave me some emergency funds.
- See you guys tomorrow.
- Bye.
Eight dollars and a coupon for a free car wash? And it's expired.
Guess I'll have to raise the money myself.
I've been wishing for Something missing.
To fill this empty space.
To fill this empty space.
To show the person behind the curtain.
To show the person behind the curtain.
So you'll understand Who I really am.
Who I really am.
The me that you don't see.
Is praying there's a chance, you still believe.
Tell me that I'm worth it.
I'll prove that I deserve it.
And I can be.
And I can be.
The me that you don't see.
Is praying there's a chance, you still believe.
Tell me that I'm worth it.
I'll prove that I deserve it.
And I can be.
And I can be.
The me that you don't see The me that you don't see I would have asked to borrow it, but you just looked so peaceful sleeping.
You're a lot less peaceful when you're awake.
Okay, if I roll a three that means I win.
Come on, three.
Let's see that three.
Give me a three.
Give me a three.
Will you just roll the dice already? Three.
It's a three! Oops.
I accidentally knocked over the board.
Now we'll never know who won.
That's fine with me.
Not everything in life is a competition.
Ha! Beat you.
I win.
Ha! Beat you again.
Seriously? Come on.
How cool is it that we're on the same bathroom schedule? So cool.
I'm gonna go use the bathroom in the rest stop.
Here.
Thanks for letting me use your toothbrush.
I didn't say you could use my toothbrush.
I said tooth paste.
Pfft! I know.
I was just kidding.
Here's your toothbrush that I didn't use.
Hmm.
It's Ally.
Hello? What do you mean you missed your plane? Are you serious? She missed the plane? Aw, come on.
Surprise! Ally, what are you doing here? I thought we were gonna pick you up from the airport? My plane landed early and I wanted to surprise you guys.
- Dez! - Don't sneak up on people like that.
What were you thinking? You scared the heck out of me.
Anyway.
Ally, I missed you.
- Where's Austin? - He's still asleep.
Let's go sneak up on him and scare the heck out of him.
Surprise! I know.
Surpri He's not in here either.
Remind me to lock the door when I use the bathroom on the bus.
Yeah.
If Austin isn't here, then where is he? I can't believe Austin Moon is actually on our bus.
I must have gotten on your bus by mistake last night.
- Where are we? - How would I know? I'm a little girl.
But we've been driving all night since we left that rest stop.
Seriously? No, you need to turn around.
You need to take me back to Washington.
We can't.
We're on our way to the Buttercup Jamboree.
I can't believe I'm trapped on a bus with a bunch of screaming Buttercups.
I know! Nobody's seen him.
I looked everywhere.
He's not here.
So he just left his phone on the bus and disappeared? - Found 'em.
- Where is he? Austin? I have no idea where he is.
I found Crunchkins! The crunchiest cheese puffs in the world.
They sell them at the vending machine here.
I got two bags.
Hey, this is Austin Moon.
You've reached Hilary B.
's phone.
Leave a message.
Bam.
Hey, this is Austin Moon.
You've reached Hilary H.
's phone.
Leave a message.
Bam.
Okay.
That's everyone's outgoing message.
Now can I please use your phone to call one of my friends? - I can't believe Austin Moon - I know what you're gonna say.
You can't believe Austin Moon is gonna use your phone.
I can't believe Austin Moon knew what I was gonna say.
Oh.
Hello? Austin? You're where? You're gonna what? I can't here you.
Dez, please stop crunching.
Go ahead, Austin.
Yes.
Dez finally found Crunchkins.
What's going on? Yeah, so now we're in Idaho.
And they're gonna drop me off at the nearest airport.
Hopefully I won't have to wait too long to catch the next flight.
I can't wait to see you.
I can't wait to see you too.
I'm just bummed that now we only have one day to spend together.
Hey, cheer up.
A whole day is better than two half days.
Actually, two half days are the same as Never mind.
Well, I'll see you in Washington.
I'll be there.
I just have to finish making I don't see him.
You don't think he missed his flight? - Found 'em.
- Where is he? Huh? Oh, not Austin.
Flame O's.
The world's hottest cheese puffs.
You can only get these in airports.
Mmm.
Hot hot! - Austin? - Hot hot hot hot! Dez, shh.
Go ahead, Austin.
Yes, Dez finally found Flame O's.
Where are you? I just got off the plane.
Where are you guys? We're by the arrival gate.
I don't see you.
You're in Washington D.
C.
, aren't you? Yeah.
Why? We're in Washington State.
There are two Washingtons? Why do they keep doing that? I can't believe we're This stinks.
By the time you get here, we'll only have a half hour together.
Well, I don't care how much time we have.
I just want to see you.
I just want to see you too.
You know who else wants to see you? tickets for tonight's concert.
You better be on the next flight.
You're supposed to be on stage in eight hours.
I'll be there in six.
Okay, bye.
Don't worry, Ally.
He'll make it.
Oh sorry.
I'll get it.
It's coming right out.
Austin Austin Austin! Austin Austin Austin! He was supposed to be on stage 20 minutes ago.
- This isn't good.
- My plane is gonna take off soon.
I can't believe I'm not gonna see him.
I found 'em.
Little Golden Toes.
Nobody cares about your dumb snacks.
No, I found Austin.
I always call him Little Golden Toes.
Ally! Austin.
- I missed you.
- I missed you too.
I hate to break this up, but Little Golden Toes needs to get on stage.
Hey, only Dez can call me that.
I am so glad you're here.
I'll see you after the show? Austin, I can't.
You got here so late, I have to leave before the show is over.
Oh.
After all we went through to get together and that's it? I guess this is goodbye.
Seattle, are you ready to rock?! Sorry Seattle, uh Just give me one second.
Ally, please stay.
Oh.
Austin, I wish I could.
I have that meeting with Ronnie Ramone tomorrow.
I know.
I just thought I'd give it a shot.
It's just that everything's better with you.
My singing's better.
My dancing's better.
My everything's better.
I know.
And I write better when you're around.
Yeah.
We make a good team.
Sorry.
I Should get back.
Seattle, are you ready to do this? Um My bad, Seattle.
Um, just give me a second.
Last time, I promise.
Okay.
I finally realized why I've had so much trouble finishing songs.
I need somebody to bounce my ideas off of.
I need inspiration.
I need you.
That means a lot.
- I'm gonna miss you.
- Wait wait.
I was thinking What's the point of going to a meeting with a bunch of unfinished songs? Wouldn't it make more sense to reschedule the meeting and go in with finished songs? Yeah.
It makes sense to me.
Well, see you.
Wait, no! Austin.
I want you to help me finish the songs.
I'm gonna stay with you for the rest of the tour.
Yes! Austin Austin Austin! I hate to break this up again, but Right.
I'm so happy you're gonna stay with us.
Me too.
Oh.
Sorry.
It gets out.
Guys, I'm so glad Ally's going to spend the rest of the tour with us.
The next few weeks are going to be so much fun.
Yeah Let's go wake her up and scare the heck out of her.
Okay shh, shh, shh - Shh! - Shh! Shh! Surprise! I can't believe I'm actually on Austin Moon's tour bus! Uh, where's Ally? You've got to be kidding me.