Freaky Eaters (2007) s03e01 Episode Script
Addicted to Bacon and Burgers
NARRATOR: 'Niquita Hartshorn is 29 and lives with her boyfriend | of 11 years, Matt.
A former child singing star, she appears to be a bubbly, | popular 20-something.
But inside, | Niquita's hiding a secret.
She's addicted to | bacon and burgers .
.
getting through two-thirds | of her own body weight in salty meat every year.
This meaty menu is bulked out with | lashings of stodgy chips and beans.
' All I can eat is junk food | and I need to eat to live, so at the moment for me | it's junk food.
'Her fatty diet is so extreme that anything fresh or healthy | turns her stomach.
' Minging.
'Over the next four weeks, | Niquita will battle her demons with the help of psychologist | Felix Economakis and nutritionist Charlotte Watts.
While Charlotte tackles | her dreadful diet' Are you managing that one? | It smells fishy.
'.
.
Felix will uncover | her painful past.
' As I was walking over | with my friend, theythey dragged me to the floor | and said, "Get me something to kill her with.
" 'Can Niquita find her voice and | reclaim her shattered confidence to beat a lifetime of food phobias?' I don't like that.
'29-year-old Bolton girl Niquita works in the finance department | at the local bread company and lives with her fiance, Matt.
When it comes to food, every day | she faces a greasy choice between bacon' I wouldn't like to guess how many | bits of bacon I eat.
Too much.
'.
.
or burgers.
' Can I haveum | a plain hamburger, please? 'And the weird food phobias | don't stop there.
' If I'm having a burger it just | has to be just a plain burger.
Nothing on it at all.
And if it has, I take it back.
I don't like my food | mixing on the plate.
Anything with sauces and salad can't touch anything | that I'm going to eat.
'The only other thing she can stomach | are chips, beans and bread.
' No vegetables whatsoever, you know.
The healthy foods | she doesn't touch at all.
'Tasting anything new is traumatic.
' I look at other people's food | and I want to eat it.
Trying to put it in my mouth, I start panicking before it even | gets to my mouth, to be honest.
It's like I'm scared I'm gonna | gag on it, which I do sometimes.
If it doesn't feel right | on my tongue As soon as my brain starts | ticking in, I put like a mental barrier there so it's like, "No, I can't try it.
| I don't like," without even knowing.
(SPITS) She'll taste.
"I don't like that.
It tastes like dirt | out of the ground.
" That's what she said to me once.
| (LAUGHS) It was like, "What?" | You know what I mean? 'But life wasn't always this tough.
As a child, Niquita | was a minor local celebrity, winning dance competitions, | singing solo performances and enjoying her success.
' That was one of my favourite ones.
Highest mark - 212.
She's been a championship dancer, | ballroom, ballet, tap, modern.
Been all over the country.
'But her true passion | was for singing.
' It took up, like, 95% of my life and it's one of the best times | I can think back on and they're the best memories | that I've got.
'Throughout her singing years, | she was always a fussy eater, but as she performed less and less, | her diet got worse and worse.
And for her superfit boyfriend, | it's hard to watch.
' She's eating rubbish all the time and she's not exercising | a great deal like she used to, with all her dancing and everything.
She's getting bigger | and over the weight and then with her skin, | you know what I mean? As well as, like, | being tired all the time or having no energy, you know.
She's got no drive, no go anymore.
I just feel that drained.
I go to bed and I'll sleep till | about one o'clock in the afternoon and I can get up for about two hours and then I could quite easily | go back to bed, so I literally have no energy | at all.
'For the man in her life, | patience is starting to wear thin.
' It would be easier | to just go and walk away and find somebody else, you know.
Someone who's just "normal", | you know.
And I can just, like, go to | restaurants and not feel ashamed, but I love her.
'Without help, | Niquita's future looks uncertain.
' I just don't know what's gonna | happen if I don't change.
I don't know if I'm gonna | lose my partner over it, I don't know if I'm gonna | make myself poorly, and that scares me - that I can'tI might not be able | to do the things that normal people do.
'It's Day One | on the road to recovery.
Niquita has travelled to London | to meet the experts - nutritionist Charlotte Watts | and psychologist Felix Economakis.
' Hi.
| Hello.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Charlotte.
| Nice to meet you.
Hi.
I'm Felix.
| Nice to meet you.
How are you feeling? | I'm nervous.
I'm very nervous.
Don't worry! (LAUGHS) | That's to be expected.
Now, Niquita, | we have something to show you, so if you'd just follow us and we'll | just take you in the cinema.
OK.
| OK.
So, Niquita, the next two weeks | are gonna be very challenging and that's why we'd like to show you | something that will help you.
It is gonna be difficult, but please remember that it's from | the people who care about you most.
We'll come and catch up with you | in a minute, OK? All right.
| Bye.
Hiya, Niquita.
It's your mum here.
Right, Bubbles, if we don't get you help now, you're not gonna be around forever | because you're putting weight on.
Your condition of your skin.
And I look at your hair | and you'd got thick blonde hair, and now it's just | like string, darling.
It'sheartbreaking for me to, like, see how your eating | is affecting you, you know.
No energy, no go about yourself.
I just wanna see | the old Niquita back.
Hi, Niq.
It's me, your dad.
We've seen such a change | in these last 10-15 years.
It's real upsetting for people | like me, who really care about you.
And I know it'll hurt you | to hear me calling you, because I love you so much, | but it's all I can do.
I'm sorry, but | I'm crying.
If it carries on | the way it does carry on, II don't think I can keep | taking it any more, you know.
It willwe'll end up splitting up over something really stupid | as food, so all I wanna do is just, like, | wish you luck and say that I love you.
OK, Niquita, so | that looked like quite difficult.
Yeah.
| Yeah.
It's obviously quite scary that Matthew's saying | he can't take it for much longer.
We've been together 11 years.
| I don't wanna Obviously I don't wanna | lose him, but It's quite a concentrated thing | to see, isn't it? And just every one of 'em saying, | like, how much I've changed and how much I've lost | my bubbly personality and stuff.
Do you feel that yourself? Yeah.
Yeah, I do feel like that.
I'm not as confident and that | as I used to be.
So there's still this | little bubbly girl in there? Somewhere.
| Well, we need to get her back.
OK.
| Let's go.
NARRATOR: 'But will the ugly face | of her extreme diet be enough to put Niquita off | for good?' Out you come.
Look at this.
| Let's walk you a little closer.
So, we have taken a look | at your food diary and this is what you are eating | in a year - all of this food that you see here.
What's it like | to take that in, Niquita? It's pretty disgusting.
NARRATOR: 'If that's not bad enough, | here are the numbers.
' 300 rashers of bacon.
1,875 slices of bread.
200 cans of beans and sausages.
60 kilos of chips.
250 beef burgers that you | also take in in a year.
I just wanna get a kind of snapshot | from you, just looking at this so far I don't fancy any chips.
(LAUGHS) | Yeah? This diet is pretty much a recipe | for bloatedness and tiredness.
It's just all fat and just stodge.
I need to do it.
I'm ready to do it.
| It's not nice.
Good.
| Good.
In the next four weeks, what would you like to achieve | at the end of that? Just to eat something | with a bit of vegetables and something more | that my body needs.
And who would you like to | eat that with? My partner.
| OK.
He's frustrated and fed up.
So remember this picture and let's | expand to a bit of colour.
Niquita's diet is pretty shocking.
It's a whole lot of garbage, | basically.
She can't go on eating this.
She's gonna have | a lot of health problems.
'Back home and Niquita's | had time to reflect on her family's messages to her.
' How was London? | Good.
Good? | Yeah.
I see messages from my family and I | was crying all the way through 'em.
Yeah.
I could have just sat there and just give you this, like | lovey-dovey message, yeah, but I'm the one who's been with you | for, like, 11 years and it's hard for me.
That's why my message was harsh, and I've seen you go from what | I seen to, like, what you're like.
I'm gonnaI'm gonna change, | though.
I know.
I love you to bits, yeah.
| I do.
But I wanted to, like, | kind of shake you into just a bit of change.
I know.
| And you've done it.
At least you've made the start | and I'm proud of you, OK? Yeah.
(LAUGHS) Don't think about | anybody else's feelings, but actually seeing the messages, I realise how much I'm hurting | everybody else around me as well cos they're seeing me change.
Not particularly like | the way I look, not particularly liking | the way I feel.
Umso hopefully this will | get me back on track.
'The first step on Niquita's | road to recovery is to understand | the underlining reasons behind her troublesome eating.
Felix has invited her to join him so he can find out why | her childhood fussiness with food became a full-blown phobia | in adulthood.
' Can we just start by you | telling me a little bit about how your eating behaviour has | been a problem for you in your life.
I've always been fussy, | from as far back as I can remember, but I think I've just got worse | as I've got older because the older I get, | the less I've been trying stuff.
So, the food you like to eat - | burgers, beans, sausages.
There's something about those foods | that makes them acceptable to you and something about all other foods | that doesn't.
It's safe.
| It's safe.
Cos I know what I'm getting.
I look at food and, like, | whatever Matthew eats and I think, | "Yeah, it looks really nice and" But it's just I can't bring myself | to put it in my mouth.
When people say, | "Try this, try this," I can feel myself, like, | panicking inside and then I think I've built myself up that I'm that anxious | before I get it even into my mouth Right.
I've lost the battle | before I've even begun.
Has anything else unusual | happened in your life that's a source of stress that could make this worse? There was aa time | when I got attacked.
I was15.
I was going to stay at my friend's | and there were two girls andthey said that they needed to | take their temper out on somebody and unfortunately that was me, so As I was walking over with my friend, theythey dragged me to the floor and one of 'em | was straddled across me and said, "Get me something | to kill her with cos she doesn't know who we are.
" So they came back with a brick.
| (SOBS) And startedsmashing it in my face | and dropping it on my face.
And askin' | Hang on.
Hold on for a sec.
Just take a few deep breaths | for a sec.
Make your mind blank | and take it out of your mind.
Just imagine all that | knowing it's in the past now, just imagine it just draining out | on your feet, cos you realise now that | it's behind you and you're safe.
Yeah.
I do.
I just don't tend | to talk about it.
Always, as a psychologist, if I hear a | life-threatening incident, the kind of trauma | warning bells come up and, you know, it's not exactly | rocket science.
It's some kind of mistrust | that you'll be safe with food.
Does that | It does make sense.
To be honest, I don't trust anything | or anyone anymore.
Does it hold you back | from your career, what you'd like to do | in any way or? I work in an office at the moment, but when I was younger all I wanted to do was be a dancer | or a singer, so And now I'm doing something | that's the complete opposite.
I don't know where I'm | supposed to be going in my life.
I feel like I don't fit anywhere | at the moment.
Given what Niquita's experienced, with that intense assault | when she was 15, she's actually coped very well.
I mean, some people | develop agoraphobia - they're afraid to leave their houses and they have all sorts of | other fears.
So she's done surprisingly well, but I still think this would have impacted on her eating behaviour | as well, then.
Just made her more nervous | about the unknown.
The things I spoke to Felix about | I've kind of mentioned in the past, but I've never really spoken about | them in detail.
Umsometimes | it's quite hard to deal with and it's easier to talk to a stranger than it is to your own family | and friends.
NARRATOR: 'While Felix | works out a way to deal with some of her past trauma, Charlotte wants to find out more | about her present food phobias.
' The plan today is to find out | where Niquita lies in terms of food, trying new food and how much of a job | it's going to be to move her on from | her extremely restricted diet.
So, when you look at | this spread here, what's coming to mind? Talk me through what you see.
Yeah, I think it looks nice.
Like, that salad looks really nice, but getting it into my mouth | is where I struggle.
OK.
I think we should start.
No.
| (BOTH LAUGH) Let's talk some more.
| (LAUGHS) You mentioned that you | don't like foods together, so you have some rules.
| Yeah.
I'm inclined to push you.
How would you feel about eating | tomato and cucumber together, in one mouthful? OK.
Sorry.
| It's all right.
It's OK after | The initial shock.
Yeah.
I did thelike the gag | thing, but I don't know why because it wasn't actually that bad.
I don't know why my body did that.
Habit.
| Yeah, probably.
The gag reflex is protection because our body thinks | it's gonna have to expel something that's potentially harmful to us.
| OK.
NARRATOR: 'But Niquita's gag reflex has been protecting her | from healthy foods for 20 years.
Charlotte presses on.
' That doesn't taste very nice to me.
'Chicken and other veg | fare no better.
' I can feel, like, lots of bits | on my teeth and stuff.
No.
I 'As meat and veg are a struggle, Charlotte tries a fishy alternative.
' So, do you want me to try this? | Yeah, please.
With cucumber or on its own? I'm happy if you try it with | the cucumber.
Absolutely.
Just a little bit, yeah? Are you managing that one? | It smells fishy.
(LAUGHS) I don't even like | walking past the fish market All right.
I'm sorry.
I can't eat it.
| It's all right.
It's all right.
I'm really sorry.
| No, it's all right.
Good try, though.
Your face went through | a whole load of changes there.
What was going on inside? I was panicking and I could just It sounds really stupid, and I know | it sounds stupid before I say it, but it was just getting | more and more fishy.
Eugh! I can still taste it.
Niquita had a couple of gag reflexes andso much of this, to her, | is about fear and the unfamiliar.
She's not battling with me | in the sense of control, but she's trying to work it out | for herself.
That's gonna be | a large journey for her.
It's something I know that she can | see that she needs to do, but I think | she's quite scared of it.
NARRATOR: 'To help her on her way, Charlotte's given Niquita | a hamper of healthy goodies' Sweet.
| Food.
'.
.
and some homework tasks.
' "Try one different vegetable a day, | preferably green.
Also, clear out the tins.
| Time for a clear-out.
Remove all the tinned foods from | your cupboards and fridge and throw them in the bin.
" Serious? | That's what it says.
Goodbye.
(LAUGHS) | Au revoir.
OK, I've nothing left | in my cupboard.
I know.
| (LAUGHS) You've no hands.
Say bye-bye, Niquita.
| (LAUGHS) 'But while it's bye-bye to | the tins of beans and sausages' Thank you.
'.
.
it's round two for the broccoli.
' Are you ready? It's gone.
| You gagged a little bit at the end.
I know.
| And then you went (LAUGHS) Yeah, but I didn't wanna | spit it out.
Oh.
| You shouldn't be laughing.
I can't help it! (LAUGHS) You know what I mean? I'm astounded that she's | trying things, you know.
It's likebefore | you wouldn't even You wouldn't even entertain that.
It didn't taste as bad as last time.
| I'm proud of you.
I'm pleased that I've got | some broccoli down, because I think that was one of the | vegies that I tried with Charlotte and I was like, "Oh, no.
It smells | disgusting, it tastes disgusting.
" ButumI do know it's something | that my body needs, soI'm gonna stick with it.
I'm not just gonna | I'm not just gonna give up.
I am gonna keep trying with it.
'With the promise of a new start, Niquita and her mum head out shopping | for a new look.
' It'd just show every lump and bump | on me, so I don't think so.
But you wouldn't wear that.
| I think it's cute.
But it'd stick out, and, like, | with my hips and stuff 'But 20 years of burgers and chips means that her wardrobe choices | are a bit limited.
' I like these, but this probably | won't look very nice on me because it's clingy.
You never know, darling.
| I'll go to the changing room.
Let me have a look at 'em on you.
Don't see half of 'em | cos she comes out upset.
She likes 'em, | but they don't suit her.
She looks horrible in 'em.
I don't like it.
| No.
No, it's not you.
Obviously the clothes I like don't | suit me, being the size I am, so I feel a bit minging to be honest.
| A bitlike, too chunky.
It's just your eating.
'So, when it's time for lunch, Niquita's keen to show her mum | that she means business.
' Can I haveI'm gonna try | a hot chicken salad, please.
Well, I'm shocked | I'm flabbergasted.
Yeah, I've not got it down me yet.
| (LAUGHS) Just baby steps.
'But could this be | too much too soon?' Yeah, that's mine.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's a lot for me.
But I did struggle with the chicken | when I was with Charlotte, but it's one of the things | that I do wanna eat.
This is weird, trying it | in front of you, though.
I know.
You've got a rash coming.
| It's nerves.
Were it not nice, that bit? It's not that it's not nice, | it's just like It's just a different taste for me.
Carrot's all right.
'But after 20 minutes, Mum can't help | but comment on the lack of progress.
' You're just playing with it.
Are you really enjoying it? It's not about enjoying it | just yet, though.
I think you're expecting | too much of me straight away.
Cos I were expecting you to have | a couple more forkfuls.
It's like you think | I've not done anything.
I don't.
I | That's how it feels, though.
Don't get upset.
Don't know - just think maybe | just you weren't the right person to come for lunch with | when I tried this.
You look down in the dumps now.
I mean, it's only been, what, | a couple of days into it.
I thought that was, like, | a really big step.
At least I'm managing | to keep some of it down.
I don't know.
I just didn't feel It wasn't a very comfortable | situation at the end.
'It's Friday and Felix | has asked Niquita to join him at the Harlow dog tracks.
' I think yours is last.
| Yeah, I think it is last.
'Following their last | emotional session, Felix wants to find out more about | Niquita's confidence crisis.
' What we're working on today | is building up your confidence because you told me before it's your | confidence that's holding you back from having interesting experiences.
| Yeah.
When you see somebody you don't | know, you've never met before, how confident do you feel about | just saying something to them? Striking up a conversation.
If I've nothing that I need | to say to 'em, then I won't just strike up | random conversation for no reason.
The purpose of today | is to really do something that's slightly | out of your comfort zone, which is just approaching | somebody you don't know, you've never met before, and actually striking up | a conversation.
OK.
OK, Niquita.
| Let's put this to the test.
Want you to strike up a minute | of sustained conversation with someone of my choice.
Let's start off easy.
That chap | eating the crisps by the wall.
Interrupting his food? | Yeah.
(LAUGHS) OK.
| OK? Off you go.
Excuse me.
| Can I ask you a question? I've never been betting before and I | just I have no idea what you do.
Any chance | you can tell me what to do? The first time is the hardest time, so I'm hoping when she breaks | through the first time she gets on a roll until building up momentum | where she just has a breakthrough.
Thank you.
That's a very good start.
So, let's have a look | at someone else.
Two blokes talking to each other.
Excuse me.
(LAUGHS) I'm sorry to interrupt you, but 'Before long, | the shy, untrusting Niquita seems to have disappeared.
' I'm sorry to bother you.
Are we right to just talk to you | for a minute? 'And forgetting Felix entirely, she soon becomes best buddies | with half of the people in the bar.
' I'm just nosing into your | conversation (LAUGHS) .
.
just to learn how to dohow | you're going about doing the dogs cos I've never been before and I've no idea what you do | or how you I was expecting Niquita | to be very apprehensive and basically be really scared, because this is actually scary stuff | for a lot of people, and she actually was really | confident doing it.
Thank you for your time.
| All right, thank you.
Well, all credit to you | that you did this challenge, but again, I'm really impressed by | how confidently you did it.
Other might people do it, but really | be, "Look, I'm really sorry," and be a bit nervous | and a bit sweaty, but I really believe you're a lot more confident | and courageous and open-minded than you currently think you are - | that's your perception.
I've gone into it | expecting to do things that are uncomfortable to me | and unusual and I've kind of thought, | "Yeah, I'm gonna just do it.
" So what I'd like you to do is take that same learning | that you've made today and apply it to food.
I think coming to the dog track, | it did actually make sense.
I can kind of see | why we're doing it, but probably shocked at myself | at how easy I found it.
I think, from today, I will apply | the techniques that I've used today to my food, and just go at it open-mindedly | and give it a good go, cos maybe everything's not as bad | as what it first seems.
'While Niquita's got over | the first hurdle of getting new foods in her mouth, she's still struggling to find meals | she can actually eat.
Charlotte has suggested | a new breakfast option - natural yoghurt.
' I use it to stop my sunburn | on holiday and that's as far as I go | with natural yoghurt.
It smells like stuff | I've tasted before.
It smells like I don't know.
| The smell's familiar.
Well, I didn't spit it out, | so that's progress.
It's not nice.
I think that's enough | natural yoghurt for today.
It is only baby steps | that I'm taking, but to me, it's massive.
Just worried that maybe | what I'm doing is not enough.
I'm just not sure how far | or how realistic the end goal is for me just yet.
'Worried about Niquita's health, Charlotte has sent her | for blood tests.
Today she travels to London | for the results.
' Because of her really bad habits, | within her eating, her energy levels are always low, | you know.
She's always, like, | tired all the time.
She justshe's always ill.
| She's always ill.
Always.
Always ill.
I do worry about her future because there's only so much | a body can take and then you don't know, you know.
I am nervous.
Even if they say something bad, I need to take it | in a positive way, really, rather than lettin' it get me down.
'Dr Pixie McKenna is a GP with a | special interest in eating problems.
She's analysed Niquita's | blood results to find out exactly what damage | her junk food diet has caused.
' So, Niquita, this is Dr Pixie.
Very nice to meet you.
| Nice to meet you.
Are you a bit nervous? | Yeah.
I've been ploughing through | all of your blood results.
The first thing, really, is that you're very, very high level | of a thing called uric acid in your blood.
Sounding like it's a problem.
| It is a problem.
Right.
OK.
Uric acid crystallises and it can | cause something called gout.
'Gout is a disease caused | by uric acid in the body.
This creates crystals | that build up around the joints.
It's characterised by severe | stiffness, swelling and burning pain.
Since gout is caused by protein-rich | foods like bacon and burgers, Niquita gets a glimpse | into the future.
' Now, that's what we call acute gout.
| It doesn't look nice.
So painful that people | go to casualty because they think | they've broken the bone.
I have seen grown men cry with gout.
Look at these.
| Yeah.
I do get things when it's like | I can be carrying something and my hands will swell | and they'll go all blotchy and I do get that quite a lot | and it's painful.
So it may well be that you've had | mini attacks of gout already.
Crikey.
That's | that's a worry, actually.
'And it's not just gout | that Niquita has to worry about.
' Have you heard of kidney stones? | Yeah.
They start off like this, and you end up | trying to pee golf balls.
Right.
OK.
Can you imagine | that is how painful it is.
Are you a drinker? | No.
No? Looking at your liver function | test, grossly abnormal.
Your diet ispretty junk-ridden with none of the components | that your liver needs to detoxify.
You're not looking very happy.
I think I'm falling apart.
Although this is doom and gloom, | it is What I need to hear.
| Yeah.
But, you know, you are 29.
There's time | and there's a lot we can do.
So I want you to take this as being | a positive thing in that way, but see this | as a severe warning as well.
I kind of expected | something to be wrong, but just not as much | as what came out.
I think next time I'm faced with | a plate of vegetables or whatever, I think I now need | to think to myself, "I need to eat these, | otherwise I'm gonna get poorly," cos it's not a case of, oh, I know | I don't like it.
Push it away.
My body needs it now.
It's like it's crying out for it, | soyeah, I need to I'll try and use it | in a positive way.
'Felix is in Bolton to find out more | about Niquita's assault.
Although the girls responsible | were caught, he thinks that Niquita's still | deeply affected.
' because Niquita was very fearful | and a young child when this happened to her, and I'd like to get | some more information to fill in those missing pieces of the impact that | that assault had on the family.
I hear you've got photos and We've got everything of Niquita.
| You've got everything.
Yeah.
From her being a baby upwards, | yeah.
Right.
| We've got loads of trophies.
These are just some | of when she was a dancer.
Happy smiling little girl.
And so how old was she here? Here she was about 21.
| About 21.
The King And I perhaps? Yeah, she was a naughty little girl | in that.
She wasumthe lead again | in Starlight Express.
My God.
So she's done | At the Palace Theatre.
She's pretty good.
(LAUGHS) An entertainer.
| She used to be good, should I say.
And then it all changed | when she were beaten up.
That was the last one.
She kind of went in her shell.
Do you feel you've both | dealt with that attack differently, in your own ways? Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
| How have you dealt with it? I thought I'd been there | for Niquita, you know.
Sheshe obviously needed you a lot | after the attack.
Yeah.
I suppose I felt wanted.
| (LAUGHS) I didn't even let her breathe | without me being there.
Umto look after her.
I mean, it's hard, as a parent | I'm a parent too and there's nothing more instinctive | than being there and wanting to be there for a child, and certainly if it doesn't need us | as much, we feel like, "Oh, it was my job.
| I had a bit of a meaning.
" I just wanted her to be | like she used to be.
Do you feel you've accepted | the new Niquita? No.
| Right.
In my mind, in the aftermath | of that assault Niquita suffered, there seems to be a schism between | the old Niquita and the new Niquita.
The old Niquita was seen | as everything positive - beautiful, dancing, singing.
And the new Niquita is seen | as the antithesis of that, so she's depressed, | she's unattractive, she's moody, and it's not gonna help Niquita | overcome her food fears.
So I really wanna do something to sort of put that | old perspective to rest.
'Having ditched the bacon butties | and struggling with yoghurt, Niquita's still finding it hard | to eat a healthy breakfast.
' I'm gonna have porridge | and I'm gonna put a banana in.
Brilliant.
| Do you want porridge with me? Yeah, I'll have | some porridge with you.
Milk.
| Milk.
Make a change, us sharing | a healthy breakfast.
Yeah.
| Won't it? It's good.
You really impressed | with my porridge skills? Yeah, I am.
OK.
Yeah? It's good? | Mmm.
Sharing a decent breakfast together.
I'm really happy that you're eating, | like, a normal breakfast.
You know, a bit of banana, | a little bit of fruit.
It's good.
Yeah? Finished? | For today.
Jubbly.
She keeps, like, you know, | doing really well.
Matthew's really pleased, | really proud of me, and I think that's all | I can really ask for.
UmI'm quite happy with | the way I'm going at the moment.
'Despite her breakfast success, Niquita's still struggling | to finish an entire meal, especially one with veg in it.
' Hello.
'So, Charlotte has summoned Niquita | to London, where she hopes | a little Spanish influence will take her to the next level.
' Part of the reason | for choosing tapas is that you get to choose | lots of little small portions, so it's quite a nice way for you to take control of tasting | and testing things.
I'm gonna let you lead.
| What's that one? That is chard, which is | a green leafy vegetable, cooked with hazelnut and raisins.
Kind of like cabbage leaf, really.
I don't like that.
Oh, that was barely in there.
| It tastes just not nice for me.
Let's move on.
| OK.
Well There's gnocchi with black olives.
I don't like that either.
I'm tryin' to come into it, | like, more open-minded, but it's just stuff | I've been trying at home I've not had as bad a reaction | as I have to this.
To me, it just feels a bit like | a step back.
OK.
| So I'm a bit upset, actually.
It's like it just catches up with | you and all of a sudden it's like It's just hit me, like, | what I'm trying to do.
Yeah.
This is | the hardest point, really.
There's so much about this | that's new and unfamiliar and you really, really must not give | yourself a hard time about it, and I don't want you to see this as | a struggle, so we'll finish here.
You've done really, really well to | just sit here and try new things.
I've been positive | all the way up to this point, and nowI feel a bit like | I let myself down.
It's just hard for me, really, | so I think I'm gonna go to bed, try not to worry about it too much and when I get up in the morning, | just try again.
'With her confidence at rock bottom, Felix has called Niquita | to Birmingham.
It's time to put her food fears | at centre stage.
' I think Niquita's problem | is two-fold.
The first part is | her lack of confidence and the second one is | I'd really like her to get over that assault that she suffered | when she was 15 and connect back to her old self.
Here we are at the Clothes Show | in Birmingham.
What we've got lined up is | you're gonna have a makeover.
(LAUGHS) We like that bit.
(LAUGHS) | You like that bit? How are you with that? | Yeah.
That's right.
(LAUGHS) One of the things I know about you | is you're a very talented performer.
You used to love dance, | you used to love singing.
Yeah.
After your wonderful makeover, I would like you to sing here | in front of all these people.
How are you with that? | Uhpetrified.
Right now your body's telling you | this is scary.
After you've pulled this off, | and I have faith in you, how do you think that might affect | other areas of your life? If I can overcome my nerves | and feel confident after it, then that's a good way | to approach food.
What's a tomato on a plate compared | to what you're gonna do today? I can definitely see | the point to it, like building the confidence | and stuff.
Uhjust when you bring me | and tell me what I'm doing, I can't believe how nervous | I actually am, cos I did used to do it.
You wouldn't think my nerves | would be as bad as they are, but At the minute, I'm shot to pieces.
| Just (LAUGHS) Just wanna get it over with.
'And while she gets ready, | Felix lays on another surprise.
Niquita's entire family | have made the four-hour round trip to be in the front row.
Yo, Matt.
It's nice to meet you.
| Hi there.
If we're all ready | then we can go through.
Hi, Niquita.
How you feeling? | Nervous.
Well, that's to be expected.
Even when you were performing before | you were nervous, weren't you? We've got a little bit of support | for you here today.
Your family are gonna be here | as well to support you.
Your family are there | rooting for you and I want you to take a deep breath and really show people | what you can do.
Put your hands together.
| Give her a big round of applause.
It is nerve-racking, | getting up here.
Make some noise.
Make her feel | welcome here at the Clothes Show.
She looks really cool as well.
SCREAMING Let's take it away.
Oooohhh 'But when it comes to the crunch, just as it is | when she's faced with food, Niquita's nerves take over.
' Knowing we were all here | made her upset and then she couldn't get a note.
She hasn't sang | for such a long while.
It's just nerves.
'But after a quick pep talk | and help from the crowd, she decides to stay | and face the music.
' Oooh | There'll be a place for you Somewhere deep inside Still feel your love | come through Oh, you're never coming back | Never coming back You're always in my heart Yeah, I am very kind of | Yeah, overproud.
Today, ecstatic.
Ooooh.
Thank you.
| Let's make some noise for Niquita.
CHEERING Well done.
Well done.
Well done.
It wasn't that bad, was it? You're free to go.
| Thank you.
(LAUGHS) I said, "Come on, you can do this," and she just shook herself | out of it, dug deep and she did it.
It were brilliant.
Awesome.
FELIX: She hasn't sung | for eight years.
She felt this attack | robbed her of confidence and today she really | just reclaimed that, and if she can do that for singing, she can really do it for | something like some vegetables.
I think what happened | in, like, the past six minutes has just been a journey of anxious | nervousness, and then excitement all rolled into one, so I think I just need to take | the confidence I've got coming off and take that away with me and try | and put that same approach to food.
'It's Week Three, and with the | final challenge fast approaching, Charlotte decides to tackle | the vegetable issue head-on.
And with Mum now behind her, | this time it'll be a family affair.
' Today I really want to | get her mum involved so that together they can learn to | get a bit more love of vegetables and a bit of fun in terms of learning some | preparation skills together.
OK, this is Andrew.
He's a top vegetarian chef, so he really knows his way around | a vegetable, would you say? UmI do try.
| (LAUGHS) And specifically how to make them | taste excellent.
OK, ladiesumwe're going to | prepare some vegetables.
Niquita, have you used | a vegetable peeler before? Uh-uh.
| OK.
Right.
(LAUGHS) This is long overdue.
| I've got a rough idea.
A rough idea.
'There's not a trace of bacon | or burgers in sight.
Today, vegetables take centre stage.
' And just take a few slices | on an angle, like that.
No fingers.
The fennel.
OK.
Not as scary as it looks.
Just trim that off a little bit and then take 'em off | to about there.
'Charlotte hopes that | a vegetarian master class will make all this veg | seem a little less scary.
' Double cream there.
Sea salt.
And you just wanna pop some | in there.
I watch the cooking programmes | on telly.
I think, "Yeah, that looks really | good," or, "I might try that for Matthew," | but I never get round to it.
I just watch.
Yeah, it does smell lovely.
| Yeah.
Spoon it round.
Very pretty.
| Hey, I'm quite excited.
You know what exactly is in there.
| Yeah.
I would normally cut it up and then fiddle about with it | to see what I could see inside.
I know it's just mushroom and | with, like, the wine and stuff I am a bit nervous - | I'm not gonna lie - but I'm still gonna try it | and give it a good go.
Ready? 'She may know what's in it, but will | she be able to hold down a mouthful?' It's very good.
It is nice.
I'm trying a bit of everything | round the plate.
(LAUGHS) I really like that.
I'm a good cook.
| Excellent! I'm really pleased with | how that went.
I really enjoyed it.
It was quite nice to make something, see it through to the end | and then actually taste it.
From now on, I think me and Niquita | will go in the kitchen and get to know each other better | in the kitchen and learn together.
Instead of going clothes shopping, | we can go food shopping in No, I think we'll still go | clothes shopping.
(LAUGHS) Different clothes.
'Back in Bolton, Niquita's new diet | is having a big impact.
She and Matt are even considering | a new addition to their household - their first ever dining table.
' Too farmhouse, innit? | We don't live in a cottage.
That looks like it should be | in a cocktail bar.
Yeah.
Don't know if it's gonna be | a bit too big for us.
I don'tI'm not too keen on this - | on that colour.
It's pretty funky, this.
| It's a bit low for a table.
A bit low? What do you mean? | How low can you go? It's me.
I think it was big step | that we bought a dining table and, like, we're gonna, you know, | be like normal people Instructions.
.
.
and hopefully it'll encourage her | more to eat better as well.
'And their first meal | sitting at the table together is a healthy jacket spud | and cottage cheese.
' It just looks disgusting.
| It's not too bad on potatoes.
We'll see.
'In a week's time, Niquita will sit | down to a full meal with her family, but so far she's only managed | to nibble a bit of veg.
' I'm not sure I'm gonna be able | to finish all of it.
What's that face for? | Nothing.
OK.
We'll see.
MICROWAVE BEEPS (LAUGHS) It's not that bad.
'But it's not long before | Niquita's gagging ruins the mood.
' It's just a bit ridiculous.
You've had harder things.
Yeah, but I've only tasted 'em.
This I've got to try and finish | the whole plate.
You'll be right.
Try and finish it.
| It's not hard.
There's cheese on there.
| I know.
I see it.
(SIGHS) You're, like, | being immature.
You're getting on my nerves, | so I'm gonna go.
I'm still eating it! | Can't be bothered.
I'm not the biggest fan of | cottage cheese and the potato, but I was eating it to show her that | there was no fear, you know.
And if she doesn't, like, | go into it, like, whole-heartedly, she's gonna stumble, you know.
That's what I think.
Cos I'm struggling with it, | I think he's probably thought, "Oh, great.
Why do I even bother?" It just makes me feel guilty | that I can't eat it - like he's disappointed in me.
'It's the final week.
As Niquita is still struggling, | Felix heads to Bolton.
He's convinced the past | is still holding her back and affecting her confidence | with food.
' I still feel there's | a lot of painful memories with what happened in the past, not just for Niquita, | but also for her mother.
So my aim today is to bring | mother and daughter together so they can finally | put these painful memories into the past where they belong and get some sort of closure | on what happened.
That assault that happened, those two girls have done | enough damage in both your lives that I don't want anymore energy | attached to that.
Niquita, when we first talked | in the therapy session, I picked up that you still had a lot of emotion distress | about the attack.
Ann Marie, we talked | a little about it, and obviously | it's a distressing event.
We don't talk about it, | do we, a lot? I think, for me, I tend to I tend to shut it away and not | really deal with the emotions, and to be honest, the first time | when I did speak to Felix, that was the only time I've ever | really cried as hard as I did.
What is it you both need | from the other that will help you to | make peace with what happened? I don't think I really | need anything from you to make peace with it, to be honest.
I just need you to justnot worry | about it and not dwell on it, cos you're the first one to say, "But you're living a life sentence and you don't understand | how much it's changed you.
" I suppose all I'm doing is trying | to wrap cotton wool round Niquita, even though she's a grown woman.
Yeah.
Now, you know This is the most basic instinct | of any parent, isn't it? To wrap cotton wool.
| I do it as well.
The only thing is, there's a time | to wrap cotton wool, and then the cotton wool | becomes a straitjacket.
I think just one thing you kind of | need to get your around is, one thing you say to me is, | "I just want my old Niquita back.
" Well, I think one thing you just | need to think - I'm 29 now.
I'm not gonna be that 15-year-old | girl, unfortunately.
I'm still the same person inside.
| Mmm.
I've just grown up.
If everyone can accept things | as they are, even as painful as they are, that's actually health, | that's actually healthy.
It's progress | and people can move on.
Niquita said a lot of really useful, | important things to her mum that perhaps she's | never said before.
Very liberating in some ways | to clear the air by airing their grievances.
This is actually gonna help Niquita | with her eating because everybody can accept her | as she is now without this old tension and | conflict from the past interfering, as it has been doing.
'Time for one last painful trip | down memory lane.
Niquita takes her mum to the spot | where she was attacked 14 years ago to finally lay the past to rest.
' Not far.
It's only | Well, at the bottom here.
You never actually saw where it | happened, did you? I'm not sure you really want to.
| (LAUGHS) All I got told it were | at the corner somewhere.
No, that's where they found me, | at the corner.
Umyeah.
I managed to stumble | to the end of the street.
Mum, I'm still here.
This is only | a better way of standing it.
But to be honest, standing here, | I can't say I I don't really know.
| I don't feel, like, really upset.
Just sort of, like, | sad little teenagers.
I were just in the wrong place and I think that's the only way | I can look at it from now on.
Just about moving on, isn't it? | So in that respect, it was helpful.
I suppose I've never got it | off my chest because I've overprotected Niquita.
She's scared of hurting my feelings | all the time, aren't you? All the time, yeah.
With the food, I suppose | we gave in to what she wanted just to keep her happy | all through life.
(LAUGHS) Didn't we? | Yeah.
So, yeah, it has been good.
We've put it behind us, you know.
| It's helped.
'Four weeks ago, | Niquita set herself a challenge of finishing a meal | with her boyfriend Matt.
Today she'll find out | if she's done enough to conquer her fear of food.
' I can't believe it's the final day, | to be honest, because when I started the journey | it seemed like it was ages away.
Now I'm actually on the final day.
A little bit nervous.
Trying not to dwell on it too much, cos that's when I get myself | into a state and, like, I'm overwhelmed by it all | and then I feel like I can't do it.
All right, the fear's gone | from me trying stuff, and I think I'll be all right | trying whatever I have today, but it's just actually finishing it | is a different matter.
All right? | Yeah.
Sure? | Yeah, I think so.
Justuhwith your meal, | just enjoy it, yeah? It doesn't matter what | anybody else thinks, you know.
Like, whatif they're looking | at you, just block 'em out.
You know you can do it, | you know what I mean? Come on.
'Along with Niquita's family, Charlotte and Felix | are also along for support.
' One of the real major facts here is that she hasn't actually | finished a meal yet.
That's right.
So she's always withheld that | actually going through with it, actually committing, | actually finishing.
Well, she set that goal.
This will be a perfect opportunity | for her to prove it to herself.
Absolutely.
'But with no burgers on the menu' | Thank you.
'.
.
will she find anything | she can stomach?' I'll have a banana and | almond cheesecake (LAUGHS) .
.
and skip the main course.
Just go straight onto the pudding.
| You can't do that.
Seriously, what are you | thinking about? There's not really anything | I want to try.
Everything looks a bit too big of | a stretch for me that's on here.
I don't want fish.
| I really struggle with it, don't I? So I think turkey's probably | the easiest off the list.
Are you ready to order? | Yeah.
Thanks.
Can I have the roast turkey, please? | Yeah, of course you can.
'While Matt and the family | choose their food' Hello.
Take a seat.
| There she is.
'.
.
Niquita has just enough time | for a quick pep talk.
' How are you feeling? I'm a bit nervous about the meal, | to be honest.
I think probably what I've ordered, I might not have tried | some of the things.
I think that's the scary part.
A short time ago, you were told you were gonna sing | in front of hundreds of people, and you're not gonna tell me | that this is a bigger obstacle (LAUGHS) .
.
and you sailed through that | with flying colours.
You impressed everyone.
You just need to go in there | and be kind to yourself and go and enjoy, cos you're | much more likely to succeed if you enjoy it | and you're relaxed about it.
Yeah.
I'll try.
'Niquita's chosen roast turkey | and stuffing in a red wine sauce.
I think she'llcope with it.
I'm not saying she'll eat it all.
I think Niquita is a little nervous, but I think she's determined | to do it.
I'd love to see her eat a full meal.
I don't think it'll happen tonight.
I hope it does, | but I don't think it will.
'The moment of truth | has finally arrived.
' So that's stuffing, that.
What is all this? | That's carrots.
And what's that? | That's potato.
Is it all right? | Yeah? What do you think of the turkey? It's all right.
You're just training your brain, | aren't you, to see what you like.
I mean, you wouldn't have been able | to eat that a couple of month ago, would you? It's really good to see her, like she's enjoying something | that's not I wouldn't say enjoying.
| You know, don't push it.
I'm surviving.
| I think you're enjoying it.
Yeah.
I think deep down | you're just unsure.
You know, you're just unsure.
I'm not so keen on the stuffing.
| OK.
Everything else I can kind of cope | with, it's just taking me a while.
'Niquita's determined | to finish her meal, but 20 minutes later, everyone else | has cleared their plate and she's still struggling.
' Come on.
You can do it.
You've just gotta push on, yeah? What, do you feel it's safer | when you was on that stage, yeah? Yeah? Just stick to the stuff | that you enjoy, yeah? Yeah? I think that's it now.
| Yeah.
Fair enough.
You've done bloody well | You've done well to eat that.
'Although she hasn't | eaten everything, Niquita's family are overjoyed.
' (ALL CLAP) You can't put into words | how proud you are, cos I'm her mother | and I am proud of her and she's made | such a big step forward.
It made me really proud .
.
just to watch her eat something | properly like that.
Hello.
How did you do? | Hi there.
Towards the end, when everybody else | was finishing, I think a little bit of panic | probably set in.
I did as much as I could do.
| That sounds reasonable.
It's quite astounding to me because she's willing | to try things a little bit more.
I think it's just a learning curve | and she'll do really well afterwards cos I'll keep pushing her.
(ALL CLAP) The fear did kind of go away, and I think that was | the biggest thing for me, cos when I've tasted stuff, nothing's been as bad as what | I ever thought it would taste.
Yeah, I'm happy (LAUGHS) | .
.
now that it's over.
To Niq.
To a healthy future | and to good times, yeah? 'One month on, and Niquita's life | has radically transformed.
' Since Charlotte and Felix have left | me to get on with it on my own, I think I've done all right.
I'm still trying to try new things.
She's eating sweet potato.
| She's eating peppers now.
She can't get enough | of eating chicken.
Can I please try | the char-grilled chicken? We went for a meal.
I had the same | on my plate that he had, and he was like, | "Yeah, she's eating it.
" I'm so proud of you.
| Thank you.
Really proud of you.
I've got more energy and I've lost | a little bit of weight.
I feel better about myself.
I don't feel as self-conscious | when I'm going out.
She's a happier person.
It's proven to her that, you know, she can do anything she wants | if she puts her mind to it.
Oooh 'And this more confident Niquita even wants to brush up | on her singing skills.
' Made me realise what I'm missing.
It was something I enjoyed | a long time ago and there's no reason | I can't do it now.
She's going forward, and like she said, | she won't be going backwards again.
My mum would say, "Oh, I've got | some of the old Niquita back," so it's just some of the old | Niquita, just more grown-up.
Closed Captions by CSI
A former child singing star, she appears to be a bubbly, | popular 20-something.
But inside, | Niquita's hiding a secret.
She's addicted to | bacon and burgers .
.
getting through two-thirds | of her own body weight in salty meat every year.
This meaty menu is bulked out with | lashings of stodgy chips and beans.
' All I can eat is junk food | and I need to eat to live, so at the moment for me | it's junk food.
'Her fatty diet is so extreme that anything fresh or healthy | turns her stomach.
' Minging.
'Over the next four weeks, | Niquita will battle her demons with the help of psychologist | Felix Economakis and nutritionist Charlotte Watts.
While Charlotte tackles | her dreadful diet' Are you managing that one? | It smells fishy.
'.
.
Felix will uncover | her painful past.
' As I was walking over | with my friend, theythey dragged me to the floor | and said, "Get me something to kill her with.
" 'Can Niquita find her voice and | reclaim her shattered confidence to beat a lifetime of food phobias?' I don't like that.
'29-year-old Bolton girl Niquita works in the finance department | at the local bread company and lives with her fiance, Matt.
When it comes to food, every day | she faces a greasy choice between bacon' I wouldn't like to guess how many | bits of bacon I eat.
Too much.
'.
.
or burgers.
' Can I haveum | a plain hamburger, please? 'And the weird food phobias | don't stop there.
' If I'm having a burger it just | has to be just a plain burger.
Nothing on it at all.
And if it has, I take it back.
I don't like my food | mixing on the plate.
Anything with sauces and salad can't touch anything | that I'm going to eat.
'The only other thing she can stomach | are chips, beans and bread.
' No vegetables whatsoever, you know.
The healthy foods | she doesn't touch at all.
'Tasting anything new is traumatic.
' I look at other people's food | and I want to eat it.
Trying to put it in my mouth, I start panicking before it even | gets to my mouth, to be honest.
It's like I'm scared I'm gonna | gag on it, which I do sometimes.
If it doesn't feel right | on my tongue As soon as my brain starts | ticking in, I put like a mental barrier there so it's like, "No, I can't try it.
| I don't like," without even knowing.
(SPITS) She'll taste.
"I don't like that.
It tastes like dirt | out of the ground.
" That's what she said to me once.
| (LAUGHS) It was like, "What?" | You know what I mean? 'But life wasn't always this tough.
As a child, Niquita | was a minor local celebrity, winning dance competitions, | singing solo performances and enjoying her success.
' That was one of my favourite ones.
Highest mark - 212.
She's been a championship dancer, | ballroom, ballet, tap, modern.
Been all over the country.
'But her true passion | was for singing.
' It took up, like, 95% of my life and it's one of the best times | I can think back on and they're the best memories | that I've got.
'Throughout her singing years, | she was always a fussy eater, but as she performed less and less, | her diet got worse and worse.
And for her superfit boyfriend, | it's hard to watch.
' She's eating rubbish all the time and she's not exercising | a great deal like she used to, with all her dancing and everything.
She's getting bigger | and over the weight and then with her skin, | you know what I mean? As well as, like, | being tired all the time or having no energy, you know.
She's got no drive, no go anymore.
I just feel that drained.
I go to bed and I'll sleep till | about one o'clock in the afternoon and I can get up for about two hours and then I could quite easily | go back to bed, so I literally have no energy | at all.
'For the man in her life, | patience is starting to wear thin.
' It would be easier | to just go and walk away and find somebody else, you know.
Someone who's just "normal", | you know.
And I can just, like, go to | restaurants and not feel ashamed, but I love her.
'Without help, | Niquita's future looks uncertain.
' I just don't know what's gonna | happen if I don't change.
I don't know if I'm gonna | lose my partner over it, I don't know if I'm gonna | make myself poorly, and that scares me - that I can'tI might not be able | to do the things that normal people do.
'It's Day One | on the road to recovery.
Niquita has travelled to London | to meet the experts - nutritionist Charlotte Watts | and psychologist Felix Economakis.
' Hi.
| Hello.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Charlotte.
| Nice to meet you.
Hi.
I'm Felix.
| Nice to meet you.
How are you feeling? | I'm nervous.
I'm very nervous.
Don't worry! (LAUGHS) | That's to be expected.
Now, Niquita, | we have something to show you, so if you'd just follow us and we'll | just take you in the cinema.
OK.
| OK.
So, Niquita, the next two weeks | are gonna be very challenging and that's why we'd like to show you | something that will help you.
It is gonna be difficult, but please remember that it's from | the people who care about you most.
We'll come and catch up with you | in a minute, OK? All right.
| Bye.
Hiya, Niquita.
It's your mum here.
Right, Bubbles, if we don't get you help now, you're not gonna be around forever | because you're putting weight on.
Your condition of your skin.
And I look at your hair | and you'd got thick blonde hair, and now it's just | like string, darling.
It'sheartbreaking for me to, like, see how your eating | is affecting you, you know.
No energy, no go about yourself.
I just wanna see | the old Niquita back.
Hi, Niq.
It's me, your dad.
We've seen such a change | in these last 10-15 years.
It's real upsetting for people | like me, who really care about you.
And I know it'll hurt you | to hear me calling you, because I love you so much, | but it's all I can do.
I'm sorry, but | I'm crying.
If it carries on | the way it does carry on, II don't think I can keep | taking it any more, you know.
It willwe'll end up splitting up over something really stupid | as food, so all I wanna do is just, like, | wish you luck and say that I love you.
OK, Niquita, so | that looked like quite difficult.
Yeah.
| Yeah.
It's obviously quite scary that Matthew's saying | he can't take it for much longer.
We've been together 11 years.
| I don't wanna Obviously I don't wanna | lose him, but It's quite a concentrated thing | to see, isn't it? And just every one of 'em saying, | like, how much I've changed and how much I've lost | my bubbly personality and stuff.
Do you feel that yourself? Yeah.
Yeah, I do feel like that.
I'm not as confident and that | as I used to be.
So there's still this | little bubbly girl in there? Somewhere.
| Well, we need to get her back.
OK.
| Let's go.
NARRATOR: 'But will the ugly face | of her extreme diet be enough to put Niquita off | for good?' Out you come.
Look at this.
| Let's walk you a little closer.
So, we have taken a look | at your food diary and this is what you are eating | in a year - all of this food that you see here.
What's it like | to take that in, Niquita? It's pretty disgusting.
NARRATOR: 'If that's not bad enough, | here are the numbers.
' 300 rashers of bacon.
1,875 slices of bread.
200 cans of beans and sausages.
60 kilos of chips.
250 beef burgers that you | also take in in a year.
I just wanna get a kind of snapshot | from you, just looking at this so far I don't fancy any chips.
(LAUGHS) | Yeah? This diet is pretty much a recipe | for bloatedness and tiredness.
It's just all fat and just stodge.
I need to do it.
I'm ready to do it.
| It's not nice.
Good.
| Good.
In the next four weeks, what would you like to achieve | at the end of that? Just to eat something | with a bit of vegetables and something more | that my body needs.
And who would you like to | eat that with? My partner.
| OK.
He's frustrated and fed up.
So remember this picture and let's | expand to a bit of colour.
Niquita's diet is pretty shocking.
It's a whole lot of garbage, | basically.
She can't go on eating this.
She's gonna have | a lot of health problems.
'Back home and Niquita's | had time to reflect on her family's messages to her.
' How was London? | Good.
Good? | Yeah.
I see messages from my family and I | was crying all the way through 'em.
Yeah.
I could have just sat there and just give you this, like | lovey-dovey message, yeah, but I'm the one who's been with you | for, like, 11 years and it's hard for me.
That's why my message was harsh, and I've seen you go from what | I seen to, like, what you're like.
I'm gonnaI'm gonna change, | though.
I know.
I love you to bits, yeah.
| I do.
But I wanted to, like, | kind of shake you into just a bit of change.
I know.
| And you've done it.
At least you've made the start | and I'm proud of you, OK? Yeah.
(LAUGHS) Don't think about | anybody else's feelings, but actually seeing the messages, I realise how much I'm hurting | everybody else around me as well cos they're seeing me change.
Not particularly like | the way I look, not particularly liking | the way I feel.
Umso hopefully this will | get me back on track.
'The first step on Niquita's | road to recovery is to understand | the underlining reasons behind her troublesome eating.
Felix has invited her to join him so he can find out why | her childhood fussiness with food became a full-blown phobia | in adulthood.
' Can we just start by you | telling me a little bit about how your eating behaviour has | been a problem for you in your life.
I've always been fussy, | from as far back as I can remember, but I think I've just got worse | as I've got older because the older I get, | the less I've been trying stuff.
So, the food you like to eat - | burgers, beans, sausages.
There's something about those foods | that makes them acceptable to you and something about all other foods | that doesn't.
It's safe.
| It's safe.
Cos I know what I'm getting.
I look at food and, like, | whatever Matthew eats and I think, | "Yeah, it looks really nice and" But it's just I can't bring myself | to put it in my mouth.
When people say, | "Try this, try this," I can feel myself, like, | panicking inside and then I think I've built myself up that I'm that anxious | before I get it even into my mouth Right.
I've lost the battle | before I've even begun.
Has anything else unusual | happened in your life that's a source of stress that could make this worse? There was aa time | when I got attacked.
I was15.
I was going to stay at my friend's | and there were two girls andthey said that they needed to | take their temper out on somebody and unfortunately that was me, so As I was walking over with my friend, theythey dragged me to the floor and one of 'em | was straddled across me and said, "Get me something | to kill her with cos she doesn't know who we are.
" So they came back with a brick.
| (SOBS) And startedsmashing it in my face | and dropping it on my face.
And askin' | Hang on.
Hold on for a sec.
Just take a few deep breaths | for a sec.
Make your mind blank | and take it out of your mind.
Just imagine all that | knowing it's in the past now, just imagine it just draining out | on your feet, cos you realise now that | it's behind you and you're safe.
Yeah.
I do.
I just don't tend | to talk about it.
Always, as a psychologist, if I hear a | life-threatening incident, the kind of trauma | warning bells come up and, you know, it's not exactly | rocket science.
It's some kind of mistrust | that you'll be safe with food.
Does that | It does make sense.
To be honest, I don't trust anything | or anyone anymore.
Does it hold you back | from your career, what you'd like to do | in any way or? I work in an office at the moment, but when I was younger all I wanted to do was be a dancer | or a singer, so And now I'm doing something | that's the complete opposite.
I don't know where I'm | supposed to be going in my life.
I feel like I don't fit anywhere | at the moment.
Given what Niquita's experienced, with that intense assault | when she was 15, she's actually coped very well.
I mean, some people | develop agoraphobia - they're afraid to leave their houses and they have all sorts of | other fears.
So she's done surprisingly well, but I still think this would have impacted on her eating behaviour | as well, then.
Just made her more nervous | about the unknown.
The things I spoke to Felix about | I've kind of mentioned in the past, but I've never really spoken about | them in detail.
Umsometimes | it's quite hard to deal with and it's easier to talk to a stranger than it is to your own family | and friends.
NARRATOR: 'While Felix | works out a way to deal with some of her past trauma, Charlotte wants to find out more | about her present food phobias.
' The plan today is to find out | where Niquita lies in terms of food, trying new food and how much of a job | it's going to be to move her on from | her extremely restricted diet.
So, when you look at | this spread here, what's coming to mind? Talk me through what you see.
Yeah, I think it looks nice.
Like, that salad looks really nice, but getting it into my mouth | is where I struggle.
OK.
I think we should start.
No.
| (BOTH LAUGH) Let's talk some more.
| (LAUGHS) You mentioned that you | don't like foods together, so you have some rules.
| Yeah.
I'm inclined to push you.
How would you feel about eating | tomato and cucumber together, in one mouthful? OK.
Sorry.
| It's all right.
It's OK after | The initial shock.
Yeah.
I did thelike the gag | thing, but I don't know why because it wasn't actually that bad.
I don't know why my body did that.
Habit.
| Yeah, probably.
The gag reflex is protection because our body thinks | it's gonna have to expel something that's potentially harmful to us.
| OK.
NARRATOR: 'But Niquita's gag reflex has been protecting her | from healthy foods for 20 years.
Charlotte presses on.
' That doesn't taste very nice to me.
'Chicken and other veg | fare no better.
' I can feel, like, lots of bits | on my teeth and stuff.
No.
I 'As meat and veg are a struggle, Charlotte tries a fishy alternative.
' So, do you want me to try this? | Yeah, please.
With cucumber or on its own? I'm happy if you try it with | the cucumber.
Absolutely.
Just a little bit, yeah? Are you managing that one? | It smells fishy.
(LAUGHS) I don't even like | walking past the fish market All right.
I'm sorry.
I can't eat it.
| It's all right.
It's all right.
I'm really sorry.
| No, it's all right.
Good try, though.
Your face went through | a whole load of changes there.
What was going on inside? I was panicking and I could just It sounds really stupid, and I know | it sounds stupid before I say it, but it was just getting | more and more fishy.
Eugh! I can still taste it.
Niquita had a couple of gag reflexes andso much of this, to her, | is about fear and the unfamiliar.
She's not battling with me | in the sense of control, but she's trying to work it out | for herself.
That's gonna be | a large journey for her.
It's something I know that she can | see that she needs to do, but I think | she's quite scared of it.
NARRATOR: 'To help her on her way, Charlotte's given Niquita | a hamper of healthy goodies' Sweet.
| Food.
'.
.
and some homework tasks.
' "Try one different vegetable a day, | preferably green.
Also, clear out the tins.
| Time for a clear-out.
Remove all the tinned foods from | your cupboards and fridge and throw them in the bin.
" Serious? | That's what it says.
Goodbye.
(LAUGHS) | Au revoir.
OK, I've nothing left | in my cupboard.
I know.
| (LAUGHS) You've no hands.
Say bye-bye, Niquita.
| (LAUGHS) 'But while it's bye-bye to | the tins of beans and sausages' Thank you.
'.
.
it's round two for the broccoli.
' Are you ready? It's gone.
| You gagged a little bit at the end.
I know.
| And then you went (LAUGHS) Yeah, but I didn't wanna | spit it out.
Oh.
| You shouldn't be laughing.
I can't help it! (LAUGHS) You know what I mean? I'm astounded that she's | trying things, you know.
It's likebefore | you wouldn't even You wouldn't even entertain that.
It didn't taste as bad as last time.
| I'm proud of you.
I'm pleased that I've got | some broccoli down, because I think that was one of the | vegies that I tried with Charlotte and I was like, "Oh, no.
It smells | disgusting, it tastes disgusting.
" ButumI do know it's something | that my body needs, soI'm gonna stick with it.
I'm not just gonna | I'm not just gonna give up.
I am gonna keep trying with it.
'With the promise of a new start, Niquita and her mum head out shopping | for a new look.
' It'd just show every lump and bump | on me, so I don't think so.
But you wouldn't wear that.
| I think it's cute.
But it'd stick out, and, like, | with my hips and stuff 'But 20 years of burgers and chips means that her wardrobe choices | are a bit limited.
' I like these, but this probably | won't look very nice on me because it's clingy.
You never know, darling.
| I'll go to the changing room.
Let me have a look at 'em on you.
Don't see half of 'em | cos she comes out upset.
She likes 'em, | but they don't suit her.
She looks horrible in 'em.
I don't like it.
| No.
No, it's not you.
Obviously the clothes I like don't | suit me, being the size I am, so I feel a bit minging to be honest.
| A bitlike, too chunky.
It's just your eating.
'So, when it's time for lunch, Niquita's keen to show her mum | that she means business.
' Can I haveI'm gonna try | a hot chicken salad, please.
Well, I'm shocked | I'm flabbergasted.
Yeah, I've not got it down me yet.
| (LAUGHS) Just baby steps.
'But could this be | too much too soon?' Yeah, that's mine.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's a lot for me.
But I did struggle with the chicken | when I was with Charlotte, but it's one of the things | that I do wanna eat.
This is weird, trying it | in front of you, though.
I know.
You've got a rash coming.
| It's nerves.
Were it not nice, that bit? It's not that it's not nice, | it's just like It's just a different taste for me.
Carrot's all right.
'But after 20 minutes, Mum can't help | but comment on the lack of progress.
' You're just playing with it.
Are you really enjoying it? It's not about enjoying it | just yet, though.
I think you're expecting | too much of me straight away.
Cos I were expecting you to have | a couple more forkfuls.
It's like you think | I've not done anything.
I don't.
I | That's how it feels, though.
Don't get upset.
Don't know - just think maybe | just you weren't the right person to come for lunch with | when I tried this.
You look down in the dumps now.
I mean, it's only been, what, | a couple of days into it.
I thought that was, like, | a really big step.
At least I'm managing | to keep some of it down.
I don't know.
I just didn't feel It wasn't a very comfortable | situation at the end.
'It's Friday and Felix | has asked Niquita to join him at the Harlow dog tracks.
' I think yours is last.
| Yeah, I think it is last.
'Following their last | emotional session, Felix wants to find out more about | Niquita's confidence crisis.
' What we're working on today | is building up your confidence because you told me before it's your | confidence that's holding you back from having interesting experiences.
| Yeah.
When you see somebody you don't | know, you've never met before, how confident do you feel about | just saying something to them? Striking up a conversation.
If I've nothing that I need | to say to 'em, then I won't just strike up | random conversation for no reason.
The purpose of today | is to really do something that's slightly | out of your comfort zone, which is just approaching | somebody you don't know, you've never met before, and actually striking up | a conversation.
OK.
OK, Niquita.
| Let's put this to the test.
Want you to strike up a minute | of sustained conversation with someone of my choice.
Let's start off easy.
That chap | eating the crisps by the wall.
Interrupting his food? | Yeah.
(LAUGHS) OK.
| OK? Off you go.
Excuse me.
| Can I ask you a question? I've never been betting before and I | just I have no idea what you do.
Any chance | you can tell me what to do? The first time is the hardest time, so I'm hoping when she breaks | through the first time she gets on a roll until building up momentum | where she just has a breakthrough.
Thank you.
That's a very good start.
So, let's have a look | at someone else.
Two blokes talking to each other.
Excuse me.
(LAUGHS) I'm sorry to interrupt you, but 'Before long, | the shy, untrusting Niquita seems to have disappeared.
' I'm sorry to bother you.
Are we right to just talk to you | for a minute? 'And forgetting Felix entirely, she soon becomes best buddies | with half of the people in the bar.
' I'm just nosing into your | conversation (LAUGHS) .
.
just to learn how to dohow | you're going about doing the dogs cos I've never been before and I've no idea what you do | or how you I was expecting Niquita | to be very apprehensive and basically be really scared, because this is actually scary stuff | for a lot of people, and she actually was really | confident doing it.
Thank you for your time.
| All right, thank you.
Well, all credit to you | that you did this challenge, but again, I'm really impressed by | how confidently you did it.
Other might people do it, but really | be, "Look, I'm really sorry," and be a bit nervous | and a bit sweaty, but I really believe you're a lot more confident | and courageous and open-minded than you currently think you are - | that's your perception.
I've gone into it | expecting to do things that are uncomfortable to me | and unusual and I've kind of thought, | "Yeah, I'm gonna just do it.
" So what I'd like you to do is take that same learning | that you've made today and apply it to food.
I think coming to the dog track, | it did actually make sense.
I can kind of see | why we're doing it, but probably shocked at myself | at how easy I found it.
I think, from today, I will apply | the techniques that I've used today to my food, and just go at it open-mindedly | and give it a good go, cos maybe everything's not as bad | as what it first seems.
'While Niquita's got over | the first hurdle of getting new foods in her mouth, she's still struggling to find meals | she can actually eat.
Charlotte has suggested | a new breakfast option - natural yoghurt.
' I use it to stop my sunburn | on holiday and that's as far as I go | with natural yoghurt.
It smells like stuff | I've tasted before.
It smells like I don't know.
| The smell's familiar.
Well, I didn't spit it out, | so that's progress.
It's not nice.
I think that's enough | natural yoghurt for today.
It is only baby steps | that I'm taking, but to me, it's massive.
Just worried that maybe | what I'm doing is not enough.
I'm just not sure how far | or how realistic the end goal is for me just yet.
'Worried about Niquita's health, Charlotte has sent her | for blood tests.
Today she travels to London | for the results.
' Because of her really bad habits, | within her eating, her energy levels are always low, | you know.
She's always, like, | tired all the time.
She justshe's always ill.
| She's always ill.
Always.
Always ill.
I do worry about her future because there's only so much | a body can take and then you don't know, you know.
I am nervous.
Even if they say something bad, I need to take it | in a positive way, really, rather than lettin' it get me down.
'Dr Pixie McKenna is a GP with a | special interest in eating problems.
She's analysed Niquita's | blood results to find out exactly what damage | her junk food diet has caused.
' So, Niquita, this is Dr Pixie.
Very nice to meet you.
| Nice to meet you.
Are you a bit nervous? | Yeah.
I've been ploughing through | all of your blood results.
The first thing, really, is that you're very, very high level | of a thing called uric acid in your blood.
Sounding like it's a problem.
| It is a problem.
Right.
OK.
Uric acid crystallises and it can | cause something called gout.
'Gout is a disease caused | by uric acid in the body.
This creates crystals | that build up around the joints.
It's characterised by severe | stiffness, swelling and burning pain.
Since gout is caused by protein-rich | foods like bacon and burgers, Niquita gets a glimpse | into the future.
' Now, that's what we call acute gout.
| It doesn't look nice.
So painful that people | go to casualty because they think | they've broken the bone.
I have seen grown men cry with gout.
Look at these.
| Yeah.
I do get things when it's like | I can be carrying something and my hands will swell | and they'll go all blotchy and I do get that quite a lot | and it's painful.
So it may well be that you've had | mini attacks of gout already.
Crikey.
That's | that's a worry, actually.
'And it's not just gout | that Niquita has to worry about.
' Have you heard of kidney stones? | Yeah.
They start off like this, and you end up | trying to pee golf balls.
Right.
OK.
Can you imagine | that is how painful it is.
Are you a drinker? | No.
No? Looking at your liver function | test, grossly abnormal.
Your diet ispretty junk-ridden with none of the components | that your liver needs to detoxify.
You're not looking very happy.
I think I'm falling apart.
Although this is doom and gloom, | it is What I need to hear.
| Yeah.
But, you know, you are 29.
There's time | and there's a lot we can do.
So I want you to take this as being | a positive thing in that way, but see this | as a severe warning as well.
I kind of expected | something to be wrong, but just not as much | as what came out.
I think next time I'm faced with | a plate of vegetables or whatever, I think I now need | to think to myself, "I need to eat these, | otherwise I'm gonna get poorly," cos it's not a case of, oh, I know | I don't like it.
Push it away.
My body needs it now.
It's like it's crying out for it, | soyeah, I need to I'll try and use it | in a positive way.
'Felix is in Bolton to find out more | about Niquita's assault.
Although the girls responsible | were caught, he thinks that Niquita's still | deeply affected.
' because Niquita was very fearful | and a young child when this happened to her, and I'd like to get | some more information to fill in those missing pieces of the impact that | that assault had on the family.
I hear you've got photos and We've got everything of Niquita.
| You've got everything.
Yeah.
From her being a baby upwards, | yeah.
Right.
| We've got loads of trophies.
These are just some | of when she was a dancer.
Happy smiling little girl.
And so how old was she here? Here she was about 21.
| About 21.
The King And I perhaps? Yeah, she was a naughty little girl | in that.
She wasumthe lead again | in Starlight Express.
My God.
So she's done | At the Palace Theatre.
She's pretty good.
(LAUGHS) An entertainer.
| She used to be good, should I say.
And then it all changed | when she were beaten up.
That was the last one.
She kind of went in her shell.
Do you feel you've both | dealt with that attack differently, in your own ways? Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
| How have you dealt with it? I thought I'd been there | for Niquita, you know.
Sheshe obviously needed you a lot | after the attack.
Yeah.
I suppose I felt wanted.
| (LAUGHS) I didn't even let her breathe | without me being there.
Umto look after her.
I mean, it's hard, as a parent | I'm a parent too and there's nothing more instinctive | than being there and wanting to be there for a child, and certainly if it doesn't need us | as much, we feel like, "Oh, it was my job.
| I had a bit of a meaning.
" I just wanted her to be | like she used to be.
Do you feel you've accepted | the new Niquita? No.
| Right.
In my mind, in the aftermath | of that assault Niquita suffered, there seems to be a schism between | the old Niquita and the new Niquita.
The old Niquita was seen | as everything positive - beautiful, dancing, singing.
And the new Niquita is seen | as the antithesis of that, so she's depressed, | she's unattractive, she's moody, and it's not gonna help Niquita | overcome her food fears.
So I really wanna do something to sort of put that | old perspective to rest.
'Having ditched the bacon butties | and struggling with yoghurt, Niquita's still finding it hard | to eat a healthy breakfast.
' I'm gonna have porridge | and I'm gonna put a banana in.
Brilliant.
| Do you want porridge with me? Yeah, I'll have | some porridge with you.
Milk.
| Milk.
Make a change, us sharing | a healthy breakfast.
Yeah.
| Won't it? It's good.
You really impressed | with my porridge skills? Yeah, I am.
OK.
Yeah? It's good? | Mmm.
Sharing a decent breakfast together.
I'm really happy that you're eating, | like, a normal breakfast.
You know, a bit of banana, | a little bit of fruit.
It's good.
Yeah? Finished? | For today.
Jubbly.
She keeps, like, you know, | doing really well.
Matthew's really pleased, | really proud of me, and I think that's all | I can really ask for.
UmI'm quite happy with | the way I'm going at the moment.
'Despite her breakfast success, Niquita's still struggling | to finish an entire meal, especially one with veg in it.
' Hello.
'So, Charlotte has summoned Niquita | to London, where she hopes | a little Spanish influence will take her to the next level.
' Part of the reason | for choosing tapas is that you get to choose | lots of little small portions, so it's quite a nice way for you to take control of tasting | and testing things.
I'm gonna let you lead.
| What's that one? That is chard, which is | a green leafy vegetable, cooked with hazelnut and raisins.
Kind of like cabbage leaf, really.
I don't like that.
Oh, that was barely in there.
| It tastes just not nice for me.
Let's move on.
| OK.
Well There's gnocchi with black olives.
I don't like that either.
I'm tryin' to come into it, | like, more open-minded, but it's just stuff | I've been trying at home I've not had as bad a reaction | as I have to this.
To me, it just feels a bit like | a step back.
OK.
| So I'm a bit upset, actually.
It's like it just catches up with | you and all of a sudden it's like It's just hit me, like, | what I'm trying to do.
Yeah.
This is | the hardest point, really.
There's so much about this | that's new and unfamiliar and you really, really must not give | yourself a hard time about it, and I don't want you to see this as | a struggle, so we'll finish here.
You've done really, really well to | just sit here and try new things.
I've been positive | all the way up to this point, and nowI feel a bit like | I let myself down.
It's just hard for me, really, | so I think I'm gonna go to bed, try not to worry about it too much and when I get up in the morning, | just try again.
'With her confidence at rock bottom, Felix has called Niquita | to Birmingham.
It's time to put her food fears | at centre stage.
' I think Niquita's problem | is two-fold.
The first part is | her lack of confidence and the second one is | I'd really like her to get over that assault that she suffered | when she was 15 and connect back to her old self.
Here we are at the Clothes Show | in Birmingham.
What we've got lined up is | you're gonna have a makeover.
(LAUGHS) We like that bit.
(LAUGHS) | You like that bit? How are you with that? | Yeah.
That's right.
(LAUGHS) One of the things I know about you | is you're a very talented performer.
You used to love dance, | you used to love singing.
Yeah.
After your wonderful makeover, I would like you to sing here | in front of all these people.
How are you with that? | Uhpetrified.
Right now your body's telling you | this is scary.
After you've pulled this off, | and I have faith in you, how do you think that might affect | other areas of your life? If I can overcome my nerves | and feel confident after it, then that's a good way | to approach food.
What's a tomato on a plate compared | to what you're gonna do today? I can definitely see | the point to it, like building the confidence | and stuff.
Uhjust when you bring me | and tell me what I'm doing, I can't believe how nervous | I actually am, cos I did used to do it.
You wouldn't think my nerves | would be as bad as they are, but At the minute, I'm shot to pieces.
| Just (LAUGHS) Just wanna get it over with.
'And while she gets ready, | Felix lays on another surprise.
Niquita's entire family | have made the four-hour round trip to be in the front row.
Yo, Matt.
It's nice to meet you.
| Hi there.
If we're all ready | then we can go through.
Hi, Niquita.
How you feeling? | Nervous.
Well, that's to be expected.
Even when you were performing before | you were nervous, weren't you? We've got a little bit of support | for you here today.
Your family are gonna be here | as well to support you.
Your family are there | rooting for you and I want you to take a deep breath and really show people | what you can do.
Put your hands together.
| Give her a big round of applause.
It is nerve-racking, | getting up here.
Make some noise.
Make her feel | welcome here at the Clothes Show.
She looks really cool as well.
SCREAMING Let's take it away.
Oooohhh 'But when it comes to the crunch, just as it is | when she's faced with food, Niquita's nerves take over.
' Knowing we were all here | made her upset and then she couldn't get a note.
She hasn't sang | for such a long while.
It's just nerves.
'But after a quick pep talk | and help from the crowd, she decides to stay | and face the music.
' Oooh | There'll be a place for you Somewhere deep inside Still feel your love | come through Oh, you're never coming back | Never coming back You're always in my heart Yeah, I am very kind of | Yeah, overproud.
Today, ecstatic.
Ooooh.
Thank you.
| Let's make some noise for Niquita.
CHEERING Well done.
Well done.
Well done.
It wasn't that bad, was it? You're free to go.
| Thank you.
(LAUGHS) I said, "Come on, you can do this," and she just shook herself | out of it, dug deep and she did it.
It were brilliant.
Awesome.
FELIX: She hasn't sung | for eight years.
She felt this attack | robbed her of confidence and today she really | just reclaimed that, and if she can do that for singing, she can really do it for | something like some vegetables.
I think what happened | in, like, the past six minutes has just been a journey of anxious | nervousness, and then excitement all rolled into one, so I think I just need to take | the confidence I've got coming off and take that away with me and try | and put that same approach to food.
'It's Week Three, and with the | final challenge fast approaching, Charlotte decides to tackle | the vegetable issue head-on.
And with Mum now behind her, | this time it'll be a family affair.
' Today I really want to | get her mum involved so that together they can learn to | get a bit more love of vegetables and a bit of fun in terms of learning some | preparation skills together.
OK, this is Andrew.
He's a top vegetarian chef, so he really knows his way around | a vegetable, would you say? UmI do try.
| (LAUGHS) And specifically how to make them | taste excellent.
OK, ladiesumwe're going to | prepare some vegetables.
Niquita, have you used | a vegetable peeler before? Uh-uh.
| OK.
Right.
(LAUGHS) This is long overdue.
| I've got a rough idea.
A rough idea.
'There's not a trace of bacon | or burgers in sight.
Today, vegetables take centre stage.
' And just take a few slices | on an angle, like that.
No fingers.
The fennel.
OK.
Not as scary as it looks.
Just trim that off a little bit and then take 'em off | to about there.
'Charlotte hopes that | a vegetarian master class will make all this veg | seem a little less scary.
' Double cream there.
Sea salt.
And you just wanna pop some | in there.
I watch the cooking programmes | on telly.
I think, "Yeah, that looks really | good," or, "I might try that for Matthew," | but I never get round to it.
I just watch.
Yeah, it does smell lovely.
| Yeah.
Spoon it round.
Very pretty.
| Hey, I'm quite excited.
You know what exactly is in there.
| Yeah.
I would normally cut it up and then fiddle about with it | to see what I could see inside.
I know it's just mushroom and | with, like, the wine and stuff I am a bit nervous - | I'm not gonna lie - but I'm still gonna try it | and give it a good go.
Ready? 'She may know what's in it, but will | she be able to hold down a mouthful?' It's very good.
It is nice.
I'm trying a bit of everything | round the plate.
(LAUGHS) I really like that.
I'm a good cook.
| Excellent! I'm really pleased with | how that went.
I really enjoyed it.
It was quite nice to make something, see it through to the end | and then actually taste it.
From now on, I think me and Niquita | will go in the kitchen and get to know each other better | in the kitchen and learn together.
Instead of going clothes shopping, | we can go food shopping in No, I think we'll still go | clothes shopping.
(LAUGHS) Different clothes.
'Back in Bolton, Niquita's new diet | is having a big impact.
She and Matt are even considering | a new addition to their household - their first ever dining table.
' Too farmhouse, innit? | We don't live in a cottage.
That looks like it should be | in a cocktail bar.
Yeah.
Don't know if it's gonna be | a bit too big for us.
I don'tI'm not too keen on this - | on that colour.
It's pretty funky, this.
| It's a bit low for a table.
A bit low? What do you mean? | How low can you go? It's me.
I think it was big step | that we bought a dining table and, like, we're gonna, you know, | be like normal people Instructions.
.
.
and hopefully it'll encourage her | more to eat better as well.
'And their first meal | sitting at the table together is a healthy jacket spud | and cottage cheese.
' It just looks disgusting.
| It's not too bad on potatoes.
We'll see.
'In a week's time, Niquita will sit | down to a full meal with her family, but so far she's only managed | to nibble a bit of veg.
' I'm not sure I'm gonna be able | to finish all of it.
What's that face for? | Nothing.
OK.
We'll see.
MICROWAVE BEEPS (LAUGHS) It's not that bad.
'But it's not long before | Niquita's gagging ruins the mood.
' It's just a bit ridiculous.
You've had harder things.
Yeah, but I've only tasted 'em.
This I've got to try and finish | the whole plate.
You'll be right.
Try and finish it.
| It's not hard.
There's cheese on there.
| I know.
I see it.
(SIGHS) You're, like, | being immature.
You're getting on my nerves, | so I'm gonna go.
I'm still eating it! | Can't be bothered.
I'm not the biggest fan of | cottage cheese and the potato, but I was eating it to show her that | there was no fear, you know.
And if she doesn't, like, | go into it, like, whole-heartedly, she's gonna stumble, you know.
That's what I think.
Cos I'm struggling with it, | I think he's probably thought, "Oh, great.
Why do I even bother?" It just makes me feel guilty | that I can't eat it - like he's disappointed in me.
'It's the final week.
As Niquita is still struggling, | Felix heads to Bolton.
He's convinced the past | is still holding her back and affecting her confidence | with food.
' I still feel there's | a lot of painful memories with what happened in the past, not just for Niquita, | but also for her mother.
So my aim today is to bring | mother and daughter together so they can finally | put these painful memories into the past where they belong and get some sort of closure | on what happened.
That assault that happened, those two girls have done | enough damage in both your lives that I don't want anymore energy | attached to that.
Niquita, when we first talked | in the therapy session, I picked up that you still had a lot of emotion distress | about the attack.
Ann Marie, we talked | a little about it, and obviously | it's a distressing event.
We don't talk about it, | do we, a lot? I think, for me, I tend to I tend to shut it away and not | really deal with the emotions, and to be honest, the first time | when I did speak to Felix, that was the only time I've ever | really cried as hard as I did.
What is it you both need | from the other that will help you to | make peace with what happened? I don't think I really | need anything from you to make peace with it, to be honest.
I just need you to justnot worry | about it and not dwell on it, cos you're the first one to say, "But you're living a life sentence and you don't understand | how much it's changed you.
" I suppose all I'm doing is trying | to wrap cotton wool round Niquita, even though she's a grown woman.
Yeah.
Now, you know This is the most basic instinct | of any parent, isn't it? To wrap cotton wool.
| I do it as well.
The only thing is, there's a time | to wrap cotton wool, and then the cotton wool | becomes a straitjacket.
I think just one thing you kind of | need to get your around is, one thing you say to me is, | "I just want my old Niquita back.
" Well, I think one thing you just | need to think - I'm 29 now.
I'm not gonna be that 15-year-old | girl, unfortunately.
I'm still the same person inside.
| Mmm.
I've just grown up.
If everyone can accept things | as they are, even as painful as they are, that's actually health, | that's actually healthy.
It's progress | and people can move on.
Niquita said a lot of really useful, | important things to her mum that perhaps she's | never said before.
Very liberating in some ways | to clear the air by airing their grievances.
This is actually gonna help Niquita | with her eating because everybody can accept her | as she is now without this old tension and | conflict from the past interfering, as it has been doing.
'Time for one last painful trip | down memory lane.
Niquita takes her mum to the spot | where she was attacked 14 years ago to finally lay the past to rest.
' Not far.
It's only | Well, at the bottom here.
You never actually saw where it | happened, did you? I'm not sure you really want to.
| (LAUGHS) All I got told it were | at the corner somewhere.
No, that's where they found me, | at the corner.
Umyeah.
I managed to stumble | to the end of the street.
Mum, I'm still here.
This is only | a better way of standing it.
But to be honest, standing here, | I can't say I I don't really know.
| I don't feel, like, really upset.
Just sort of, like, | sad little teenagers.
I were just in the wrong place and I think that's the only way | I can look at it from now on.
Just about moving on, isn't it? | So in that respect, it was helpful.
I suppose I've never got it | off my chest because I've overprotected Niquita.
She's scared of hurting my feelings | all the time, aren't you? All the time, yeah.
With the food, I suppose | we gave in to what she wanted just to keep her happy | all through life.
(LAUGHS) Didn't we? | Yeah.
So, yeah, it has been good.
We've put it behind us, you know.
| It's helped.
'Four weeks ago, | Niquita set herself a challenge of finishing a meal | with her boyfriend Matt.
Today she'll find out | if she's done enough to conquer her fear of food.
' I can't believe it's the final day, | to be honest, because when I started the journey | it seemed like it was ages away.
Now I'm actually on the final day.
A little bit nervous.
Trying not to dwell on it too much, cos that's when I get myself | into a state and, like, I'm overwhelmed by it all | and then I feel like I can't do it.
All right, the fear's gone | from me trying stuff, and I think I'll be all right | trying whatever I have today, but it's just actually finishing it | is a different matter.
All right? | Yeah.
Sure? | Yeah, I think so.
Justuhwith your meal, | just enjoy it, yeah? It doesn't matter what | anybody else thinks, you know.
Like, whatif they're looking | at you, just block 'em out.
You know you can do it, | you know what I mean? Come on.
'Along with Niquita's family, Charlotte and Felix | are also along for support.
' One of the real major facts here is that she hasn't actually | finished a meal yet.
That's right.
So she's always withheld that | actually going through with it, actually committing, | actually finishing.
Well, she set that goal.
This will be a perfect opportunity | for her to prove it to herself.
Absolutely.
'But with no burgers on the menu' | Thank you.
'.
.
will she find anything | she can stomach?' I'll have a banana and | almond cheesecake (LAUGHS) .
.
and skip the main course.
Just go straight onto the pudding.
| You can't do that.
Seriously, what are you | thinking about? There's not really anything | I want to try.
Everything looks a bit too big of | a stretch for me that's on here.
I don't want fish.
| I really struggle with it, don't I? So I think turkey's probably | the easiest off the list.
Are you ready to order? | Yeah.
Thanks.
Can I have the roast turkey, please? | Yeah, of course you can.
'While Matt and the family | choose their food' Hello.
Take a seat.
| There she is.
'.
.
Niquita has just enough time | for a quick pep talk.
' How are you feeling? I'm a bit nervous about the meal, | to be honest.
I think probably what I've ordered, I might not have tried | some of the things.
I think that's the scary part.
A short time ago, you were told you were gonna sing | in front of hundreds of people, and you're not gonna tell me | that this is a bigger obstacle (LAUGHS) .
.
and you sailed through that | with flying colours.
You impressed everyone.
You just need to go in there | and be kind to yourself and go and enjoy, cos you're | much more likely to succeed if you enjoy it | and you're relaxed about it.
Yeah.
I'll try.
'Niquita's chosen roast turkey | and stuffing in a red wine sauce.
I think she'llcope with it.
I'm not saying she'll eat it all.
I think Niquita is a little nervous, but I think she's determined | to do it.
I'd love to see her eat a full meal.
I don't think it'll happen tonight.
I hope it does, | but I don't think it will.
'The moment of truth | has finally arrived.
' So that's stuffing, that.
What is all this? | That's carrots.
And what's that? | That's potato.
Is it all right? | Yeah? What do you think of the turkey? It's all right.
You're just training your brain, | aren't you, to see what you like.
I mean, you wouldn't have been able | to eat that a couple of month ago, would you? It's really good to see her, like she's enjoying something | that's not I wouldn't say enjoying.
| You know, don't push it.
I'm surviving.
| I think you're enjoying it.
Yeah.
I think deep down | you're just unsure.
You know, you're just unsure.
I'm not so keen on the stuffing.
| OK.
Everything else I can kind of cope | with, it's just taking me a while.
'Niquita's determined | to finish her meal, but 20 minutes later, everyone else | has cleared their plate and she's still struggling.
' Come on.
You can do it.
You've just gotta push on, yeah? What, do you feel it's safer | when you was on that stage, yeah? Yeah? Just stick to the stuff | that you enjoy, yeah? Yeah? I think that's it now.
| Yeah.
Fair enough.
You've done bloody well | You've done well to eat that.
'Although she hasn't | eaten everything, Niquita's family are overjoyed.
' (ALL CLAP) You can't put into words | how proud you are, cos I'm her mother | and I am proud of her and she's made | such a big step forward.
It made me really proud .
.
just to watch her eat something | properly like that.
Hello.
How did you do? | Hi there.
Towards the end, when everybody else | was finishing, I think a little bit of panic | probably set in.
I did as much as I could do.
| That sounds reasonable.
It's quite astounding to me because she's willing | to try things a little bit more.
I think it's just a learning curve | and she'll do really well afterwards cos I'll keep pushing her.
(ALL CLAP) The fear did kind of go away, and I think that was | the biggest thing for me, cos when I've tasted stuff, nothing's been as bad as what | I ever thought it would taste.
Yeah, I'm happy (LAUGHS) | .
.
now that it's over.
To Niq.
To a healthy future | and to good times, yeah? 'One month on, and Niquita's life | has radically transformed.
' Since Charlotte and Felix have left | me to get on with it on my own, I think I've done all right.
I'm still trying to try new things.
She's eating sweet potato.
| She's eating peppers now.
She can't get enough | of eating chicken.
Can I please try | the char-grilled chicken? We went for a meal.
I had the same | on my plate that he had, and he was like, | "Yeah, she's eating it.
" I'm so proud of you.
| Thank you.
Really proud of you.
I've got more energy and I've lost | a little bit of weight.
I feel better about myself.
I don't feel as self-conscious | when I'm going out.
She's a happier person.
It's proven to her that, you know, she can do anything she wants | if she puts her mind to it.
Oooh 'And this more confident Niquita even wants to brush up | on her singing skills.
' Made me realise what I'm missing.
It was something I enjoyed | a long time ago and there's no reason | I can't do it now.
She's going forward, and like she said, | she won't be going backwards again.
My mum would say, "Oh, I've got | some of the old Niquita back," so it's just some of the old | Niquita, just more grown-up.
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