Good Girls (2018) s03e01 Episode Script
Find Your Beach
1 Previously on "Good Girls" I think you could be something.
And he's making money off our backs.
Yeah, and with our asses on the line.
Why don't you just tell me what you're looking for.
50/50.
Do we have a deal or not? - Mm-hmm.
- Great.
They're counterfeiters.
The paper's all totally legit, but the bills are all in sequence.
How's it going with the sister? They're after you, FBI.
- I love you.
- So what happens next? - Stan is in a jail cell.
- Because of us.
I'm out on leave.
Can't even get my old job back at the mall because they think I'm a felon.
Never again though, right? Okay.
- What do you want? - Her.
Are you gonna arrest me? Thanks for the coffee.
- Oh, my God, and then what? - Let's see how you do.
I made you something.
It's literally like nail-polish remover, hydrogen peroxide, and bleach.
What's that thing I always tell you when you make a big ol' mess? - That I gotta clean it up.
- All right, come on.
No more grown-up talk.
That's your problem.
Take care of it.
He's not my problem.
Shut your mouth, bitch, okay, and just hand - [gunshot.]
- [shrieks.]
- [gunshot.]
- [grunts.]
Go.
What do you say I call him now? - You still got odds.
- [laughing.]
We got a deal? We can totally do this without him.
We're free.
[upbeat music.]
It's a shock when someone dies.
The lights go out.
One last breath.
That's it.
The end.
So quick.
But it stays with you.
[engine revs.]
Wait, what color is that? - Bubble Gum Bellini.
- I wanted Kiss My Lips Pink.
But you said Bubble Gum Bellini.
B-R-B.
This person that you knew, or whatever they're just gone.
And it's so weird.
'Cause, like Did you ever know him at all? Yeah, I didn't.
He just worked for my mom.
She said get one of those sad cards.
On the back wall.
To the right.
Between "Bat Mitzvah" and "Just Because.
" It's a chilly English winter And solitude is never easy to maintain Except when it rains So I hang an empty smile beneath my empty eyes That'll be 15 bucks.
All I got are ones.
Gracias.
The world you once knew is being eaten up by rust No one has time for the past But still in God they trust The future is now But it's all going wrong Bodies good for nothing But it's to nothing they belong People say their prayers and some work hard If you give them all your money They'll give you their hearts Kiss My Ass Pink.
Mommy loves you.
Now be a good boy and go night-night, okay? - Oh, say goodnight to Au Jus.
- Good night, Au Jus.
[baby voice.]
Good night.
[chuckles.]
Love you.
[sighs.]
- Why don't you go home? - Uh, it's my turn.
I gotcha.
But you've been closing every night.
Go have dinner with your boyfriend.
He doesn't eat on Tuesdays.
He does intermittent fasting.
- What's wrong with this one? - Serif on the S.
Lucy, it's perfect.
Well, just didn't feel right, so Well, it will all be here tomorrow.
Tomorrow we have that quinceañera.
Oh, my God.
Go home.
Okay, I, I, uh will do this at home.
- Good night.
- Good night! [bell dings.]
[door clicks shut.]
[jazzy music.]
It's freezing out here.
I'm about to slice up a horse and crawl in "Revenant" style.
Where you gonna find a horse? Fine.
A big dog.
- Or a hunting knife? - At this hour? It's a good thing I'm also starving to death.
'Cause I'll use my teeth, and I'll eat my way in.
You'd never get through the rib cage.
Well, I wouldn't start there.
Oh, she's gonna eat some horse ass.
Least I'd be warm and full, bitch.
[Sampa the Great's "Final Form".]
The lace lady, travel with grace, baby Let's do this.
Settle that one in court, 'cause judging by the basics Y'all already comfortable stuck up in the matrix The whole key we gonna hinge the whole door off I'm still A.
D.
, never forget it It's life after death, roll the credits I hate to say my feelings for you still exist Paper feels right.
What'd you do different this time? - Scrabble tiles in the dryer.
- On delicate? Permanent press for thirty, air fluff for ten.
Hmm.
It's got that glow now too.
One part Sassy Apricot, two parts Creamsicle Sunset.
Mmm.
Mmm Is that a good "mmm" or a bad "mmm"? Yeah, nuh-uh.
What do you mean "yeah, nuh-uh?" - This ain't gonna fly.
- Why not? - Your Hamilton's whack.
- Wha - Just test it in the machine.
- Don't need to.
It would help if you could pinpoint what exactly is whack - so we could make adjustments.
- All right.
Check it.
First up.
Your boy's bouffant is wildin' out.
What? Where? Hairline's off about seventeen microns.
What program did you use this time? You know I don't know.
How do you not know? It was Editor's Choice in MacWorld.
And what's going on here? Looks like you got an extra shadow right there.
No, that that is exactly his little thingy.
You trippin' if that's how you think our founding father wears his cravat.
These are microscopic inconsistencies.
- It's close enough.
- Okay, boo.
Close enough 'll get you ten to twenty in the state pen.
Can you please just put it in the machine? - How long did this batch take? - Three weeks.
How many ones you shred? [beeps.]
- Denied.
- [groans.]
[sighs.]
- Rome wasn't built in a day.
- It burnt down in a night.
[distant sirens.]
[sighs.]
And I was like, Gwen, when we're talking about my child, you do not wanna see my temper get away from me.
Mmm, what did she say? That it was a pre-existing condition.
- Hmm.
- But she would appeal the decision with the powers that be.
Babe, I got us covered this month.
That's not the point, Stanley.
We shouldn't have to pay for meds.
We pay for insurance.
Hey.
Hey, Krystal.
Hey, how do I heat from frozen again? Hit baked potato twice, and you wanna stir it in between.
Thanks, Stanimal.
[microwave door shuts and beeps.]
[sighs.]
Little Man at dance class today.
Come on now.
Oh, and he says he hates hip hop and wants to do tap next year.
We worked so hard on that stanky leg.
- Is that your kid? - Mm-hmm.
- That's Li'l Money right there.
- Aw.
- And that's Miss Sara.
- Aw, she looks like you.
- And he looks like you.
- [both chuckling.]
Aw, I just want to eat their little faces.
You know? [chuckles.]
- So sweet, aww.
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
[laughs.]
I wanna have five kids.
[chuckles.]
- [chuckles.]
- I hope they look like that.
Here you go, baby.
- Bye.
- See ya.
Bye.
Oh, don't forget, we have to go to that rummage sale at the church on Saturday.
- I told them that we would try - Oops, you're right! One more on baked potato.
I tried to tell you.
[whispered.]
It's for our baby girl.
- [microwave beeps.]
- [sighs.]
What do I hit for popcorn? Popcorn.
[TV playing indistinctly.]
Guys, socks and shoes.
We're going to the park.
- I'm sick of the park.
- My socks are dirty.
Mine too.
- Turn them inside out.
- We already did that.
- Hey, you're home early.
- Yeah, I snuck out on break.
I gotta get back.
Here.
- Another blue envelope came.
- Thanks, honey.
[sighs.]
They're gonna take the house.
We just need to make a payment.
- It'll get 'em off our backs.
- I'll ask for some more hours.
Can you sell some more hot tubs? - It's spas.
- Spas, sorry.
And coming up at five, channel four's own Kristi Dooling joins the FBI on a dangerous raid, as they continue their mission to clean up gang activity on the Eastside - You guys, now, come on.
- Mom! - Hey! - Now in the car.
I think they've officially OD'd on the park.
Well it's free.
So he would cry every time the ball hit his foot, and I was like "Sweetie, it's okay.
It's soccer, it's supposed to do that.
" [chuckles.]
Ugh, he's my hero.
- So there's an opening on the team.
- Oh, my God.
- I could talk to Coach Freddy.
- You don't have to do that.
It could be a good distraction.
How's he sleeping? Last night, he crawled in with me asking to call Daddy.
Poor thing.
Can Marcus have a juice box? Papi, we've got our own in the car.
Don't be silly.
Hey, you want some animal crackers too? What do we say to Jane's mommy? - Thank you, Mrs.
Boland.
- You're welcome.
You're too good to him.
["Perfect Day" plays.]
No kid should be without his Daddy.
Just a perfect day Drink sangria in the park Then later when it gets dark We go home Oh it's such a perfect day I'm glad I spent it with you Oh such a perfect day You just keep me hangin' on It's one of those tank killers, right? You know it could land even if it's missing a wing? Here you go.
I just think it looks dope.
Think about what you want? Pistons.
Season tickets, courtside.
So every fool you've put away can see you up there on the jumbotron? You wouldn't make it to halftime.
White sand beach.
Warm blue water.
Couple beers and a chair.
- The farther the better.
- Mm-hmm.
One last thing popped up.
[somber music.]
Mom, your friend's here.
Hey you.
Hey you.
Yeah, so I was in your hood and thought I'd say what's up.
- What's up? - [laughs uneasily.]
Yeah, uh, sorry.
Do we know each other? Uh.
Yeah, you crashed into my car on the freeway, and then we pulled over and uh, exchanged information.
You know, in the back seat.
- Chris! - Kevin.
- I'm out.
- Uh love you.
Text me from Dad's.
Hey, guy, there's a statute of limitations on booty calls.
You said, "Let's do this again sometime.
" Well, still I I don't do that kind of thing anymore.
Ah.
Okay, uh Would it be cool if I did my own thing, and you watched? - Daddy! - What's up, Li'l Money! Sup, buddy.
[grunts.]
[laughs.]
Ah, what's up, dude? Ooh, you smell like Sweet Tarts.
It's a hazard of the job.
Did you see the president today? He doesn't guard the president.
He guards the mayor.
Does he like candy? They all do, son, they all do.
- Sup, baby.
- What happened to your face? Oh, um, somebody got a little handsy with the mayor.
All right.
- Here.
- Hey.
They make me gag.
You have no idea what we're doing to get those.
Yeah, baby.
Bottoms up.
She could be an undercover cop.
- She is not a cop.
- You don't know that.
She could be wearing a wire.
She doesn't even know what we're gonna say.
You don't know that.
She just works at a paper store, okay? Noah "just" worked at a grocery store.
- She has birds.
- How many? - More than one.
- Great, so she's a nutcase.
Or worse.
What if she's a Mary Pat.
Well, we're not gonna tell her what we're doing.
We didn't tell Mary Pat either.
You guys, we don't have to do this, okay? I talked to the dork at the Apple Store, and I can fix the design issues.
I haven't paid my mortgage in four months.
And Stan's gonna have to get on that pole.
I just need a little bit more time, and I can fi You're not an artist.
None of us are.
She has a masters in graphic design.
[scoffs.]
I could do that.
After you graduate from high school? And apply to college? - And attend college? - It's a vocation, okay? You guys, you're gonna like her.
She's cool.
[light instrumental music plays.]
Looks like the gang's all here.
So, we wanted to talk to you about doing some custom work for us.
What's the project? Casino night.
- For what? - Just a local charity.
- What charity? - Gambling addicts.
You want to do a casino night for gambling addicts? Hair of the dog.
[chuckles.]
Anyway.
We need you to design the money that we'll bet with.
I was thinking something simple, like tens.
Look, I'm really good at what I do, and if it got into the wrong hands, you know, it's kind of like counterfeit.
- Oh, you guys.
- [sighs.]
I never even thought about that.
- Wow.
- Huh.
That did not even occur to me.
Oh, what if we put on the bill: "There's more to life than gambling.
" They just wanna be treated like people.
They don't really wanna be judged.
Oh, we could put, um, one of those old time croupiers with the wax mustache and armband on it.
I think we're just gonna stick with the president.
Hamilton wasn't a president.
- He was, actually.
- No, he wasn't, actually.
They all were, you know, like Franklin and Also not a president.
Jesus, any presidents make it onto our currency? Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson Okay.
What if We print it all on different colored paper.
Then I'm good.
Great! Great.
Okay.
Uh, hey, thank you though for that, uh, heads up.
Criminals.
Can you even? - [laughing.]
- Yeah, I know, right? [all laughing.]
[coughs.]
Well.
[Diana Ross' "When We Grow Up".]
When we grow up, will I be pretty? Will you be big and strong? Will I wear dresses that show off my knees? Will you wear trousers twice as long? Well I don't care if I'm pretty at all And I don't care if you never get tall I like what I look like, and you're nice small We don't have to change at all Hey When we grow up will I be a lady? Will you be an engineer? If I have to wear things like perfume and gloves I can still pull the whistle while you steer Well I don't care if I'm pretty at all And I don't care if you never get tall I like what I look like and you're nice small We don't have to change at all When I grow up, I'm gonna be happy And do what I like to do Like making noise and making faces And making friends like you And when we grow up do you think we'll see That I'm still like you and you're still like me What's wrong with it this time? I might be pretty, you might grow tall Not a damn thing.
But we don't have to change at all [machine beeps.]
[laughing.]
You bitches just leveled up.
I'ma keep this one.
I'm so sorry.
I had to dig.
Danny hid it in the back of the closet.
He's probably scared you're gonna sign him back up.
Right? Uh, by the way, you never told me Coach Freddy was hot.
Oh, you think we're watching our kids at those games? [chuckles.]
Man, thanks again for working your magic.
I wish I could do more.
His Daddy's gonna be proud too.
What do you mean? Well, if he shows his face before the season's over.
I thought you said he was gone.
Well, then he'll pop back up like he always does.
And the poor kid won't know what hit him.
That's probably why it didn't work out for us.
- I'm so sorry.
- Will you stop? We're fine.
I think I have cleats too.
- Oh, hell no.
- What size is he? I'm not gonna tell you.
[knocking.]
- Why are you blocking the door? - Move, move.
- I can't keep this in my trunk.
- Dude.
- Mine doesn't even open, so.
- My car almost got towed.
- Hey.
- Yo.
- This is my - I'm Rhea.
Mrs.
Boland, I made this for you.
Thank you.
I murdered the kid's dad, all right? The least I could do is get him into intramural sports.
You plunged into the way deep end of the pool on this one, sis.
It's not gonna bring him back.
- I don't wanna bring him back.
- Then what's the point? Maybe I can make their lives a little bit better.
- By lying? - By helping.
You know how you help the family of the guy you ended? Yeah, you get a teardrop tattoo and you call it a day.
You do nothing.
You guys don't know what it's like, okay? Hey, I shot a guy too.
I mean in the foot.
I'm just saying, kid lost a father.
Your guy lost a toe.
Okay, you know what, don't lose your chicken over it.
- What does that even mean? - You know what it means.
I literally don't know what that means.
Exactly what it sounds like.
It's like "having a cow," ya know? Then say "having a cow.
" Well, a cow is like totally chill, so you're not gonna just lose it 'cause it's just gonna stand there, and a chicken is like running around crazy, - know what I'm saying? - No, I don't know what you're saying.
Well, that's your problem.
[door slams.]
She's so weird.
[door opens, bell jingles.]
- Oh, uh, we're closing.
- I just need a card.
I got it.
What's the occasion? Thinking of you.
Right this way.
- How ya been? - Busy.
Why don't you take that vacation? Well, that's the thing about this gig.
Just when you think you're finished something new pops up.
There's funny, religious, dirty.
Still part time? I had to take on a few more hours.
It's not easy making an honest living.
You know, maybe a card's not enough.
We have gag gifts up front.
Nah, I think I just need to make an effort, you know? Drop in on people more often.
- Tiny hands, rosé gummies - I think he's good.
- The travel straw? - All set, Lucy.
Be good, okay? I hate a pop-by.
It's always when I take my face off.
The worst part is you never know when they're gonna leave.
Or come back.
Maybe the man just needed a greeting card.
[uneasy music.]
Throw it on.
Mortgage.
Credit card.
Hopes and dreams.
- That breakfast? - Appetizer.
Wash it down with some juice, would you? Who was that guy? Nobody.
Chris.
- Kevin.
- Whatever.
Is he like your new Noah? No.
Good, 'cause that whole thing kinda sucked.
Yeah, well, no more Noahs, okay? No more Chrises or Kevins.
No more Brad, Brians, no Diegos - Gregs? - Definitely no Gregs.
I am done with Gregs.
You know, you change the name, they're all the same.
Okay.
They mess with your head, and then they ghost.
- I mean, who needs it? - Not you.
Not me.
Have some bread.
You know why? I am a fierce, independent, super fly, bossed up, - weapons grade - Llama.
Wait what? The ones at the zoo that eat from your hand.
The fuzzy camels? Remember I was like, "They love me," and you were like, "Nah, that's just 'cause you have kibble.
- They come up to anyone.
" - Yeah, but how's that me? It's just like you were saying, it's like, anyone who shows you a little affection, next thing you know you're being shaved for a sweater.
That is not exactly what I was saying.
Wanna make mac and cheese for breakfast? Just do it.
Don't think about it.
- [knocking at door.]
- Can I get it? Look before you open.
[gagging.]
- I'm seriously gonna barf.
- Stop.
Hi, you must be Stan's little guy.
Hey.
Hey, Ruthie.
- Ruby.
- Oh.
As long as we're doing names, I'm actually Diane.
Is Stan home? No, he's, uh running errands.
Oh, okay, I just wanted to say thanks for having my back in the champagne room.
There's all sorts of goodies in there, and lots of little treats for the kids too.
- [chuckles.]
- What's a champagne room? Uh, that's where the mayor celebrates.
Mayor, athletes, cops, dads.
Uh-huh, yeah, um Can you take him to the kitchen, please? - Come on.
- And take your pill.
They make me choke.
Oh, you know what that is, honey? That's your gag reflex, and you can totally fix that.
You just want to completely relax the "fur-angul" muscle, - right here under the jaw.
- Pharyngeal.
You feel it? Then you wanna open up your throat really wide, and stick the pill, on the back of your tongue.
[gulps.]
You won't even feel that sucker go down.
Now, it's gonna take some practice, for sure, and at first, it's gonna feel like that thing is jammed way too far back in your mouth, but if you just close your eyes, let it happen, before you know it, girl, you can swallow anything.
Then take your ass to Red Lobster and bring her back! She's just not answering, Mrs.
Hill, if you'd like to I'm not talking to anybody else! Gwen already knows my daughter's situation.
Please hold.
- Hi, Ruby.
- How was the popcorn shrimp? I get the admiral's platter.
You know that's not why I'm calling, Gwen.
Your appeal was denied, so We'll only cover the medicine in case of an emergency.
She takes the meds to prevent an emergency.
What am I supposed to do, call you when her kidney explodes? I understand your frustration.
Oh, you do? So, you have a sick kid too.
And your husband works a disgusting, humiliating job that demeans you as a woman and a mother.
All to pay for something that anybody on planet Earth would expect to be covered.
I've never been married.
'Kay, this is how it's gonna go down, Gwen.
You're gonna appeal my appeal, and if that doesn't work, you're gonna appeal that appeal.
And when we're done appealing They're shutting down our division.
What does that mean? My department's going to Sri Lanka.
That's a big commute, Gwen.
[choked up.]
My last day is Friday.
Yeesh, that's quick.
Yeah.
What are you gonna do? I'm gonna move back home.
At least you have family.
Yeah, it'll be tight.
My grandma's there too.
Grannies make everything better.
She's in my old room.
I'll probably just sleep on the floor.
Well, they say it's really good for you back.
Yeah? It's never been the same since the accident.
Okay, you kn uh - I'm rooting for you, G.
- Thank you.
Yeah, you're gonna get through this.
And I'll make sure the folks in Sri Lanka know about your da All right.
I already read you three.
- Please! - Are we gonna have to move? Can we paint our room purple? I'll ask Daddy.
- Night.
- Goodnight.
Goodnight, mama.
They were a gift.
- They don't fit.
- Well, he'll grow into them.
I'm gonna have to dedicate a wing of my house to you.
You don't have a wing.
Fine, a statue? A plaque? - So weird.
- [chuckles.]
I don't want any of your stuff, okay? I just want a friend.
Well, it's either you or the county sheriff.
What are you talking about? Nothing.
Nothing.
We're downsizing.
By choice? Do you want some more wine? What's going on? We're just a little behind on our mortgage.
Stop.
I'll be fine.
I'm sorry, it's just all this time, I thought you were so put together and perfect, - Oh, believe me - And you think I'm this poor, - sad, single mom.
- I do not.
I would never.
Now, you get to see how it feels.
How much? What? You can pay me back.
Absolutely not.
Marcus' dad, he sets us up.
What if he doesn't come back? Then he'll send the money.
[pensive music.]
I'm not taking your money.
How much? [sighs.]
[somber music.]
Unfortunately, sometimes I can't bottle my emotions.
And when it comes to someone I can trust, I do, I open up.
Hey, baby.
Hey.
- Stanimal.
- [chuckles.]
Uh That better not be the new season.
It certainly is.
What episode? Four.
Wow.
You just gonna go around my back like that? You're gone all night.
Okay.
All right, I see.
[sighs.]
There's a new crew this season.
[sighs.]
If you want me to quit, I'll quit.
And do what? Porn? What else pays that kinda cash? Well, clearly you have a problem with it.
Everyone's got problems they have to live with.
Not just me.
[sighs.]
Wh [chuckles.]
What's, uh, Hannah's baggage this season? - She's down a stew.
- Don't tell me that.
You just asked, and you know it's always something.
Ah, nope, nope, La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
Be tellin' me stuff.
You remember the last time, Conrad, he he got all crazy.
South Dakota originated a dish called chislic.
Hard work is easy.
Helping p - The thing about - Just fill the resev - That's why - Whether you're expecting out-of-town guests, or just a drop-by from neighborhood friends, proudly serve Wisconsin cheese.
Pain works on a sliding scale So does pleasure in a candy jail True love doesn't come around anymore Than fate allows on a Monday in Ft.
Lauderdale I came all this way to see your grave To see your life is written paraphrased I have tried thee it is written In the furnace of affliction This is what you couldn't face Life in a candy jail Peppermint bars Peanut brittle bunk beds and marshmallow walls [buzzing starts then stops.]
[buzzing starts then stops.]
[buzzing starts then stops.]
Living in a candy jail with peppermint bars Peanut brittle bunk beds and marshmallow walls Where the guards are gracious And the grounds are grand And the warden really listens and he understands Ugh.
[buzzing and silly tune.]
[sighs.]
Open wide, time to brush your teeth! - Ah! - [music stops.]
I'm gonna ask you guys something, and I want you to be honest.
Remember last winter when we saw that Celica slam into the pickup truck on I94? Uh-huh.
And the minivan couldn't stop and smashed into the Celica? Right.
And the semi went sideways, took out the SUV, crashed into all of 'em, and caught on fire.
Is that my life? Which vehicle are you in this scenario? Hey.
Whoa.
Purple.
If we have to sell the house, - I don't know if purple is the best idea.
- Dean, I paid it.
Wait, all of it? No, the interest and the penalties.
- How'd you do that? - A friend.
Okay, can we not use the phrase "a friend" anymore.
Not that friend, you know, like a mom friend.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, obviously.
Sorry, that was the trigger, it - Okay, I'm sorry.
- All right.
Remember Kenny's video game with the Nazi zombies? He's dead.
- Right, but what if he reanimates? - [chuckles.]
I don't know, I think we could take him 'cause I'm guessing he's mostly skull.
He's a skull and tats.
[mellow electronic music.]
So it looks like your room and incidentals are all covered.
Awesome, thank you, Angela.
How am I doing on loyalty points? After this day, you are officially gold status.
- Congratulations.
- Neat.
[Sophia Kennedy's "Kimono Hill".]
She's been talking on the phone So any fun plans for the rest of your day? Nah, nah, just some business.
Well, we hope to see you again soon, Mr.
Kowalski.
- You too.
Thank you, Angela.
- Bye.
Far too long The moon is rising on Kimono Hill The moon is rising on Kimono Hill Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ohh, ooh, ooh The moon, the moon, the moon The moon is rising The moon, the moon She's a tennis girl All night long All night long Volleyball weather on Kimono Hill Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh [scatting.]
Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh The moon, the moon, the moon, the moon Is rising, rising, rising Sliding down mountains Of marmalade places She turns her head to the peak Oooh
And he's making money off our backs.
Yeah, and with our asses on the line.
Why don't you just tell me what you're looking for.
50/50.
Do we have a deal or not? - Mm-hmm.
- Great.
They're counterfeiters.
The paper's all totally legit, but the bills are all in sequence.
How's it going with the sister? They're after you, FBI.
- I love you.
- So what happens next? - Stan is in a jail cell.
- Because of us.
I'm out on leave.
Can't even get my old job back at the mall because they think I'm a felon.
Never again though, right? Okay.
- What do you want? - Her.
Are you gonna arrest me? Thanks for the coffee.
- Oh, my God, and then what? - Let's see how you do.
I made you something.
It's literally like nail-polish remover, hydrogen peroxide, and bleach.
What's that thing I always tell you when you make a big ol' mess? - That I gotta clean it up.
- All right, come on.
No more grown-up talk.
That's your problem.
Take care of it.
He's not my problem.
Shut your mouth, bitch, okay, and just hand - [gunshot.]
- [shrieks.]
- [gunshot.]
- [grunts.]
Go.
What do you say I call him now? - You still got odds.
- [laughing.]
We got a deal? We can totally do this without him.
We're free.
[upbeat music.]
It's a shock when someone dies.
The lights go out.
One last breath.
That's it.
The end.
So quick.
But it stays with you.
[engine revs.]
Wait, what color is that? - Bubble Gum Bellini.
- I wanted Kiss My Lips Pink.
But you said Bubble Gum Bellini.
B-R-B.
This person that you knew, or whatever they're just gone.
And it's so weird.
'Cause, like Did you ever know him at all? Yeah, I didn't.
He just worked for my mom.
She said get one of those sad cards.
On the back wall.
To the right.
Between "Bat Mitzvah" and "Just Because.
" It's a chilly English winter And solitude is never easy to maintain Except when it rains So I hang an empty smile beneath my empty eyes That'll be 15 bucks.
All I got are ones.
Gracias.
The world you once knew is being eaten up by rust No one has time for the past But still in God they trust The future is now But it's all going wrong Bodies good for nothing But it's to nothing they belong People say their prayers and some work hard If you give them all your money They'll give you their hearts Kiss My Ass Pink.
Mommy loves you.
Now be a good boy and go night-night, okay? - Oh, say goodnight to Au Jus.
- Good night, Au Jus.
[baby voice.]
Good night.
[chuckles.]
Love you.
[sighs.]
- Why don't you go home? - Uh, it's my turn.
I gotcha.
But you've been closing every night.
Go have dinner with your boyfriend.
He doesn't eat on Tuesdays.
He does intermittent fasting.
- What's wrong with this one? - Serif on the S.
Lucy, it's perfect.
Well, just didn't feel right, so Well, it will all be here tomorrow.
Tomorrow we have that quinceañera.
Oh, my God.
Go home.
Okay, I, I, uh will do this at home.
- Good night.
- Good night! [bell dings.]
[door clicks shut.]
[jazzy music.]
It's freezing out here.
I'm about to slice up a horse and crawl in "Revenant" style.
Where you gonna find a horse? Fine.
A big dog.
- Or a hunting knife? - At this hour? It's a good thing I'm also starving to death.
'Cause I'll use my teeth, and I'll eat my way in.
You'd never get through the rib cage.
Well, I wouldn't start there.
Oh, she's gonna eat some horse ass.
Least I'd be warm and full, bitch.
[Sampa the Great's "Final Form".]
The lace lady, travel with grace, baby Let's do this.
Settle that one in court, 'cause judging by the basics Y'all already comfortable stuck up in the matrix The whole key we gonna hinge the whole door off I'm still A.
D.
, never forget it It's life after death, roll the credits I hate to say my feelings for you still exist Paper feels right.
What'd you do different this time? - Scrabble tiles in the dryer.
- On delicate? Permanent press for thirty, air fluff for ten.
Hmm.
It's got that glow now too.
One part Sassy Apricot, two parts Creamsicle Sunset.
Mmm.
Mmm Is that a good "mmm" or a bad "mmm"? Yeah, nuh-uh.
What do you mean "yeah, nuh-uh?" - This ain't gonna fly.
- Why not? - Your Hamilton's whack.
- Wha - Just test it in the machine.
- Don't need to.
It would help if you could pinpoint what exactly is whack - so we could make adjustments.
- All right.
Check it.
First up.
Your boy's bouffant is wildin' out.
What? Where? Hairline's off about seventeen microns.
What program did you use this time? You know I don't know.
How do you not know? It was Editor's Choice in MacWorld.
And what's going on here? Looks like you got an extra shadow right there.
No, that that is exactly his little thingy.
You trippin' if that's how you think our founding father wears his cravat.
These are microscopic inconsistencies.
- It's close enough.
- Okay, boo.
Close enough 'll get you ten to twenty in the state pen.
Can you please just put it in the machine? - How long did this batch take? - Three weeks.
How many ones you shred? [beeps.]
- Denied.
- [groans.]
[sighs.]
- Rome wasn't built in a day.
- It burnt down in a night.
[distant sirens.]
[sighs.]
And I was like, Gwen, when we're talking about my child, you do not wanna see my temper get away from me.
Mmm, what did she say? That it was a pre-existing condition.
- Hmm.
- But she would appeal the decision with the powers that be.
Babe, I got us covered this month.
That's not the point, Stanley.
We shouldn't have to pay for meds.
We pay for insurance.
Hey.
Hey, Krystal.
Hey, how do I heat from frozen again? Hit baked potato twice, and you wanna stir it in between.
Thanks, Stanimal.
[microwave door shuts and beeps.]
[sighs.]
Little Man at dance class today.
Come on now.
Oh, and he says he hates hip hop and wants to do tap next year.
We worked so hard on that stanky leg.
- Is that your kid? - Mm-hmm.
- That's Li'l Money right there.
- Aw.
- And that's Miss Sara.
- Aw, she looks like you.
- And he looks like you.
- [both chuckling.]
Aw, I just want to eat their little faces.
You know? [chuckles.]
- So sweet, aww.
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
[laughs.]
I wanna have five kids.
[chuckles.]
- [chuckles.]
- I hope they look like that.
Here you go, baby.
- Bye.
- See ya.
Bye.
Oh, don't forget, we have to go to that rummage sale at the church on Saturday.
- I told them that we would try - Oops, you're right! One more on baked potato.
I tried to tell you.
[whispered.]
It's for our baby girl.
- [microwave beeps.]
- [sighs.]
What do I hit for popcorn? Popcorn.
[TV playing indistinctly.]
Guys, socks and shoes.
We're going to the park.
- I'm sick of the park.
- My socks are dirty.
Mine too.
- Turn them inside out.
- We already did that.
- Hey, you're home early.
- Yeah, I snuck out on break.
I gotta get back.
Here.
- Another blue envelope came.
- Thanks, honey.
[sighs.]
They're gonna take the house.
We just need to make a payment.
- It'll get 'em off our backs.
- I'll ask for some more hours.
Can you sell some more hot tubs? - It's spas.
- Spas, sorry.
And coming up at five, channel four's own Kristi Dooling joins the FBI on a dangerous raid, as they continue their mission to clean up gang activity on the Eastside - You guys, now, come on.
- Mom! - Hey! - Now in the car.
I think they've officially OD'd on the park.
Well it's free.
So he would cry every time the ball hit his foot, and I was like "Sweetie, it's okay.
It's soccer, it's supposed to do that.
" [chuckles.]
Ugh, he's my hero.
- So there's an opening on the team.
- Oh, my God.
- I could talk to Coach Freddy.
- You don't have to do that.
It could be a good distraction.
How's he sleeping? Last night, he crawled in with me asking to call Daddy.
Poor thing.
Can Marcus have a juice box? Papi, we've got our own in the car.
Don't be silly.
Hey, you want some animal crackers too? What do we say to Jane's mommy? - Thank you, Mrs.
Boland.
- You're welcome.
You're too good to him.
["Perfect Day" plays.]
No kid should be without his Daddy.
Just a perfect day Drink sangria in the park Then later when it gets dark We go home Oh it's such a perfect day I'm glad I spent it with you Oh such a perfect day You just keep me hangin' on It's one of those tank killers, right? You know it could land even if it's missing a wing? Here you go.
I just think it looks dope.
Think about what you want? Pistons.
Season tickets, courtside.
So every fool you've put away can see you up there on the jumbotron? You wouldn't make it to halftime.
White sand beach.
Warm blue water.
Couple beers and a chair.
- The farther the better.
- Mm-hmm.
One last thing popped up.
[somber music.]
Mom, your friend's here.
Hey you.
Hey you.
Yeah, so I was in your hood and thought I'd say what's up.
- What's up? - [laughs uneasily.]
Yeah, uh, sorry.
Do we know each other? Uh.
Yeah, you crashed into my car on the freeway, and then we pulled over and uh, exchanged information.
You know, in the back seat.
- Chris! - Kevin.
- I'm out.
- Uh love you.
Text me from Dad's.
Hey, guy, there's a statute of limitations on booty calls.
You said, "Let's do this again sometime.
" Well, still I I don't do that kind of thing anymore.
Ah.
Okay, uh Would it be cool if I did my own thing, and you watched? - Daddy! - What's up, Li'l Money! Sup, buddy.
[grunts.]
[laughs.]
Ah, what's up, dude? Ooh, you smell like Sweet Tarts.
It's a hazard of the job.
Did you see the president today? He doesn't guard the president.
He guards the mayor.
Does he like candy? They all do, son, they all do.
- Sup, baby.
- What happened to your face? Oh, um, somebody got a little handsy with the mayor.
All right.
- Here.
- Hey.
They make me gag.
You have no idea what we're doing to get those.
Yeah, baby.
Bottoms up.
She could be an undercover cop.
- She is not a cop.
- You don't know that.
She could be wearing a wire.
She doesn't even know what we're gonna say.
You don't know that.
She just works at a paper store, okay? Noah "just" worked at a grocery store.
- She has birds.
- How many? - More than one.
- Great, so she's a nutcase.
Or worse.
What if she's a Mary Pat.
Well, we're not gonna tell her what we're doing.
We didn't tell Mary Pat either.
You guys, we don't have to do this, okay? I talked to the dork at the Apple Store, and I can fix the design issues.
I haven't paid my mortgage in four months.
And Stan's gonna have to get on that pole.
I just need a little bit more time, and I can fi You're not an artist.
None of us are.
She has a masters in graphic design.
[scoffs.]
I could do that.
After you graduate from high school? And apply to college? - And attend college? - It's a vocation, okay? You guys, you're gonna like her.
She's cool.
[light instrumental music plays.]
Looks like the gang's all here.
So, we wanted to talk to you about doing some custom work for us.
What's the project? Casino night.
- For what? - Just a local charity.
- What charity? - Gambling addicts.
You want to do a casino night for gambling addicts? Hair of the dog.
[chuckles.]
Anyway.
We need you to design the money that we'll bet with.
I was thinking something simple, like tens.
Look, I'm really good at what I do, and if it got into the wrong hands, you know, it's kind of like counterfeit.
- Oh, you guys.
- [sighs.]
I never even thought about that.
- Wow.
- Huh.
That did not even occur to me.
Oh, what if we put on the bill: "There's more to life than gambling.
" They just wanna be treated like people.
They don't really wanna be judged.
Oh, we could put, um, one of those old time croupiers with the wax mustache and armband on it.
I think we're just gonna stick with the president.
Hamilton wasn't a president.
- He was, actually.
- No, he wasn't, actually.
They all were, you know, like Franklin and Also not a president.
Jesus, any presidents make it onto our currency? Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson Okay.
What if We print it all on different colored paper.
Then I'm good.
Great! Great.
Okay.
Uh, hey, thank you though for that, uh, heads up.
Criminals.
Can you even? - [laughing.]
- Yeah, I know, right? [all laughing.]
[coughs.]
Well.
[Diana Ross' "When We Grow Up".]
When we grow up, will I be pretty? Will you be big and strong? Will I wear dresses that show off my knees? Will you wear trousers twice as long? Well I don't care if I'm pretty at all And I don't care if you never get tall I like what I look like, and you're nice small We don't have to change at all Hey When we grow up will I be a lady? Will you be an engineer? If I have to wear things like perfume and gloves I can still pull the whistle while you steer Well I don't care if I'm pretty at all And I don't care if you never get tall I like what I look like and you're nice small We don't have to change at all When I grow up, I'm gonna be happy And do what I like to do Like making noise and making faces And making friends like you And when we grow up do you think we'll see That I'm still like you and you're still like me What's wrong with it this time? I might be pretty, you might grow tall Not a damn thing.
But we don't have to change at all [machine beeps.]
[laughing.]
You bitches just leveled up.
I'ma keep this one.
I'm so sorry.
I had to dig.
Danny hid it in the back of the closet.
He's probably scared you're gonna sign him back up.
Right? Uh, by the way, you never told me Coach Freddy was hot.
Oh, you think we're watching our kids at those games? [chuckles.]
Man, thanks again for working your magic.
I wish I could do more.
His Daddy's gonna be proud too.
What do you mean? Well, if he shows his face before the season's over.
I thought you said he was gone.
Well, then he'll pop back up like he always does.
And the poor kid won't know what hit him.
That's probably why it didn't work out for us.
- I'm so sorry.
- Will you stop? We're fine.
I think I have cleats too.
- Oh, hell no.
- What size is he? I'm not gonna tell you.
[knocking.]
- Why are you blocking the door? - Move, move.
- I can't keep this in my trunk.
- Dude.
- Mine doesn't even open, so.
- My car almost got towed.
- Hey.
- Yo.
- This is my - I'm Rhea.
Mrs.
Boland, I made this for you.
Thank you.
I murdered the kid's dad, all right? The least I could do is get him into intramural sports.
You plunged into the way deep end of the pool on this one, sis.
It's not gonna bring him back.
- I don't wanna bring him back.
- Then what's the point? Maybe I can make their lives a little bit better.
- By lying? - By helping.
You know how you help the family of the guy you ended? Yeah, you get a teardrop tattoo and you call it a day.
You do nothing.
You guys don't know what it's like, okay? Hey, I shot a guy too.
I mean in the foot.
I'm just saying, kid lost a father.
Your guy lost a toe.
Okay, you know what, don't lose your chicken over it.
- What does that even mean? - You know what it means.
I literally don't know what that means.
Exactly what it sounds like.
It's like "having a cow," ya know? Then say "having a cow.
" Well, a cow is like totally chill, so you're not gonna just lose it 'cause it's just gonna stand there, and a chicken is like running around crazy, - know what I'm saying? - No, I don't know what you're saying.
Well, that's your problem.
[door slams.]
She's so weird.
[door opens, bell jingles.]
- Oh, uh, we're closing.
- I just need a card.
I got it.
What's the occasion? Thinking of you.
Right this way.
- How ya been? - Busy.
Why don't you take that vacation? Well, that's the thing about this gig.
Just when you think you're finished something new pops up.
There's funny, religious, dirty.
Still part time? I had to take on a few more hours.
It's not easy making an honest living.
You know, maybe a card's not enough.
We have gag gifts up front.
Nah, I think I just need to make an effort, you know? Drop in on people more often.
- Tiny hands, rosé gummies - I think he's good.
- The travel straw? - All set, Lucy.
Be good, okay? I hate a pop-by.
It's always when I take my face off.
The worst part is you never know when they're gonna leave.
Or come back.
Maybe the man just needed a greeting card.
[uneasy music.]
Throw it on.
Mortgage.
Credit card.
Hopes and dreams.
- That breakfast? - Appetizer.
Wash it down with some juice, would you? Who was that guy? Nobody.
Chris.
- Kevin.
- Whatever.
Is he like your new Noah? No.
Good, 'cause that whole thing kinda sucked.
Yeah, well, no more Noahs, okay? No more Chrises or Kevins.
No more Brad, Brians, no Diegos - Gregs? - Definitely no Gregs.
I am done with Gregs.
You know, you change the name, they're all the same.
Okay.
They mess with your head, and then they ghost.
- I mean, who needs it? - Not you.
Not me.
Have some bread.
You know why? I am a fierce, independent, super fly, bossed up, - weapons grade - Llama.
Wait what? The ones at the zoo that eat from your hand.
The fuzzy camels? Remember I was like, "They love me," and you were like, "Nah, that's just 'cause you have kibble.
- They come up to anyone.
" - Yeah, but how's that me? It's just like you were saying, it's like, anyone who shows you a little affection, next thing you know you're being shaved for a sweater.
That is not exactly what I was saying.
Wanna make mac and cheese for breakfast? Just do it.
Don't think about it.
- [knocking at door.]
- Can I get it? Look before you open.
[gagging.]
- I'm seriously gonna barf.
- Stop.
Hi, you must be Stan's little guy.
Hey.
Hey, Ruthie.
- Ruby.
- Oh.
As long as we're doing names, I'm actually Diane.
Is Stan home? No, he's, uh running errands.
Oh, okay, I just wanted to say thanks for having my back in the champagne room.
There's all sorts of goodies in there, and lots of little treats for the kids too.
- [chuckles.]
- What's a champagne room? Uh, that's where the mayor celebrates.
Mayor, athletes, cops, dads.
Uh-huh, yeah, um Can you take him to the kitchen, please? - Come on.
- And take your pill.
They make me choke.
Oh, you know what that is, honey? That's your gag reflex, and you can totally fix that.
You just want to completely relax the "fur-angul" muscle, - right here under the jaw.
- Pharyngeal.
You feel it? Then you wanna open up your throat really wide, and stick the pill, on the back of your tongue.
[gulps.]
You won't even feel that sucker go down.
Now, it's gonna take some practice, for sure, and at first, it's gonna feel like that thing is jammed way too far back in your mouth, but if you just close your eyes, let it happen, before you know it, girl, you can swallow anything.
Then take your ass to Red Lobster and bring her back! She's just not answering, Mrs.
Hill, if you'd like to I'm not talking to anybody else! Gwen already knows my daughter's situation.
Please hold.
- Hi, Ruby.
- How was the popcorn shrimp? I get the admiral's platter.
You know that's not why I'm calling, Gwen.
Your appeal was denied, so We'll only cover the medicine in case of an emergency.
She takes the meds to prevent an emergency.
What am I supposed to do, call you when her kidney explodes? I understand your frustration.
Oh, you do? So, you have a sick kid too.
And your husband works a disgusting, humiliating job that demeans you as a woman and a mother.
All to pay for something that anybody on planet Earth would expect to be covered.
I've never been married.
'Kay, this is how it's gonna go down, Gwen.
You're gonna appeal my appeal, and if that doesn't work, you're gonna appeal that appeal.
And when we're done appealing They're shutting down our division.
What does that mean? My department's going to Sri Lanka.
That's a big commute, Gwen.
[choked up.]
My last day is Friday.
Yeesh, that's quick.
Yeah.
What are you gonna do? I'm gonna move back home.
At least you have family.
Yeah, it'll be tight.
My grandma's there too.
Grannies make everything better.
She's in my old room.
I'll probably just sleep on the floor.
Well, they say it's really good for you back.
Yeah? It's never been the same since the accident.
Okay, you kn uh - I'm rooting for you, G.
- Thank you.
Yeah, you're gonna get through this.
And I'll make sure the folks in Sri Lanka know about your da All right.
I already read you three.
- Please! - Are we gonna have to move? Can we paint our room purple? I'll ask Daddy.
- Night.
- Goodnight.
Goodnight, mama.
They were a gift.
- They don't fit.
- Well, he'll grow into them.
I'm gonna have to dedicate a wing of my house to you.
You don't have a wing.
Fine, a statue? A plaque? - So weird.
- [chuckles.]
I don't want any of your stuff, okay? I just want a friend.
Well, it's either you or the county sheriff.
What are you talking about? Nothing.
Nothing.
We're downsizing.
By choice? Do you want some more wine? What's going on? We're just a little behind on our mortgage.
Stop.
I'll be fine.
I'm sorry, it's just all this time, I thought you were so put together and perfect, - Oh, believe me - And you think I'm this poor, - sad, single mom.
- I do not.
I would never.
Now, you get to see how it feels.
How much? What? You can pay me back.
Absolutely not.
Marcus' dad, he sets us up.
What if he doesn't come back? Then he'll send the money.
[pensive music.]
I'm not taking your money.
How much? [sighs.]
[somber music.]
Unfortunately, sometimes I can't bottle my emotions.
And when it comes to someone I can trust, I do, I open up.
Hey, baby.
Hey.
- Stanimal.
- [chuckles.]
Uh That better not be the new season.
It certainly is.
What episode? Four.
Wow.
You just gonna go around my back like that? You're gone all night.
Okay.
All right, I see.
[sighs.]
There's a new crew this season.
[sighs.]
If you want me to quit, I'll quit.
And do what? Porn? What else pays that kinda cash? Well, clearly you have a problem with it.
Everyone's got problems they have to live with.
Not just me.
[sighs.]
Wh [chuckles.]
What's, uh, Hannah's baggage this season? - She's down a stew.
- Don't tell me that.
You just asked, and you know it's always something.
Ah, nope, nope, La, la, la, la, la, la, la.
Be tellin' me stuff.
You remember the last time, Conrad, he he got all crazy.
South Dakota originated a dish called chislic.
Hard work is easy.
Helping p - The thing about - Just fill the resev - That's why - Whether you're expecting out-of-town guests, or just a drop-by from neighborhood friends, proudly serve Wisconsin cheese.
Pain works on a sliding scale So does pleasure in a candy jail True love doesn't come around anymore Than fate allows on a Monday in Ft.
Lauderdale I came all this way to see your grave To see your life is written paraphrased I have tried thee it is written In the furnace of affliction This is what you couldn't face Life in a candy jail Peppermint bars Peanut brittle bunk beds and marshmallow walls [buzzing starts then stops.]
[buzzing starts then stops.]
[buzzing starts then stops.]
Living in a candy jail with peppermint bars Peanut brittle bunk beds and marshmallow walls Where the guards are gracious And the grounds are grand And the warden really listens and he understands Ugh.
[buzzing and silly tune.]
[sighs.]
Open wide, time to brush your teeth! - Ah! - [music stops.]
I'm gonna ask you guys something, and I want you to be honest.
Remember last winter when we saw that Celica slam into the pickup truck on I94? Uh-huh.
And the minivan couldn't stop and smashed into the Celica? Right.
And the semi went sideways, took out the SUV, crashed into all of 'em, and caught on fire.
Is that my life? Which vehicle are you in this scenario? Hey.
Whoa.
Purple.
If we have to sell the house, - I don't know if purple is the best idea.
- Dean, I paid it.
Wait, all of it? No, the interest and the penalties.
- How'd you do that? - A friend.
Okay, can we not use the phrase "a friend" anymore.
Not that friend, you know, like a mom friend.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, obviously.
Sorry, that was the trigger, it - Okay, I'm sorry.
- All right.
Remember Kenny's video game with the Nazi zombies? He's dead.
- Right, but what if he reanimates? - [chuckles.]
I don't know, I think we could take him 'cause I'm guessing he's mostly skull.
He's a skull and tats.
[mellow electronic music.]
So it looks like your room and incidentals are all covered.
Awesome, thank you, Angela.
How am I doing on loyalty points? After this day, you are officially gold status.
- Congratulations.
- Neat.
[Sophia Kennedy's "Kimono Hill".]
She's been talking on the phone So any fun plans for the rest of your day? Nah, nah, just some business.
Well, we hope to see you again soon, Mr.
Kowalski.
- You too.
Thank you, Angela.
- Bye.
Far too long The moon is rising on Kimono Hill The moon is rising on Kimono Hill Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ohh, ooh, ooh The moon, the moon, the moon The moon is rising The moon, the moon She's a tennis girl All night long All night long Volleyball weather on Kimono Hill Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh [scatting.]
Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Woo-ooh-ooh The moon, the moon, the moon, the moon Is rising, rising, rising Sliding down mountains Of marmalade places She turns her head to the peak Oooh