The Last Kids on Earth (2019) s03e01 Episode Script

1
[mysterious music playing]
[birds tweeting]
Aah!
[grunts]
Ugh, next jungle fantasy,
I'm wearing shorts.
Uhh! Snakes!
Ah! Spiders!
[grunting]
Spider snakes?
Really? Baa, baa baa!
[screaming]
This ancient temple
needs some serious pest control!
Uhh!
-[hissing]
-[grunting]
Woo!
Jungle-y temple-y area mapped.
[growls]
Whoa! Easy now, that almost hit me.
-Ah, no, wait, wait!
-[growling]
-[growling]
-[grunting]
-[sniffing and grunting]
-Oh, Rover.
You interrupted my way too long
adventure fantasy.
[howls]
We can play later, Rover.
Right now, we need to finish
running recon on this area.
[whimpers]
Hmm. Cool, cool. Fun, fun
I know things seem great,
but we need to make sure
there aren't any more threats out here.
Like Thrull.
He was plotting the end of the world
right under our noses.
-[barks]
-Ha! Noses, exactly!
And if we're gonna
make a life in this town,
we have to make sure nothing like that
is secretly festering
in some unexplored area.
[screeching]
So, if we're here,
then over there should be
-[moaning]
-[screaming]
I'll tell you the same thing I told him.
Will play later!
[moaning and growling]
Fine, guess we'll play now.
-[growls
-]Uhh!
-[growls]
-Huh!
[zombies growling]
[grunts] Aah!
[growling]
Aah! Aah! [whimpers]
[growling]
[intro theme playing]
Whoa!
[screaming]
-Ah, crud!
-[moaning]
[zombies growling]
Back off!
I've got a bone,
and I'm not afraid to use it.
Hang on a sec.
[grunts]
[zombies stop growling]
[growling starts then stops]
[growling starts then stops]
Bones!
Zombies hate bones?
[sniffs, frowns]
Oh, the goo.
[sniffs, coughs]
Huh, something actually
more repellent than Quint's socks.
-[sniffs, makes noise]
-Hmm?
Wonder why this thing
made the zombies act that way.
-So weird.
-[grunts]
I mean relatively speaking.
The fact that I'm standing here
during an apocalypse,
discussing zombies with a monster dog
has kind of changed
the meaning of the word weird.
-[slurps]
-[laughing]
We better bring this back with us.
[snorts happily]
Oh, wow! [laughs] Look at that!
Wait till I tell the guys!
[June] Great work, guys.
We'll have this place
fixed up in no time.
-[electronic music starts playing]
-[laughs]
[whimpers]
[music fades]
-So, why do we need the slides, again?
-For fun.
Oh, I thought it was
because you humans break so easily.
Also true, for these guys, anyway.
[chuckles]
I got more of a monster build myself.
That is right! Dirk the strong one!
Dirk the strong one?
[chuckles]
That's what the monsters call me.
Not me, flesh bag.
Why don't you go back
to flesh city, you freeloader?
Now, Skaelka, that's a warrior
you want to wipe down your skillet for.
[chuckles]
Don't worry about it, flesh bag.
-[panting]
-Ah! Oh!
I fixed the Hyper-Puncher
you requested, Dirk.
[laughing]
Oh, awesome, dude!
Now I can punch way faster again.
That means you can start
on the Auto-Dirt-Digger I asked for.
Right after I finish Dirk's Stickum Gun,
then Jack's Lazer Skateboard,
then fix the Auto-Dialer
for monster emergencies
you asked for last week, June.
You sure you're OK
with all of that, Quint?
I've told you, I've got this.
It's what I do.
OK, good! Then do mine first.
After mine! Uh, glad you got
your priorities straight.
-Ha ha!
-Hmm.
[screeching]
-[screeching]
-[June] Looking good, guys!
Now, all we need is to somehow
magically power these things.
You need magic?
Bardle! Bardle!
I am concentrating.
And I am calling you!
Why do you point out
things we already know?
-Uhh.
-The humans need magic
to make power in these metal sticks.
Make it so!
My powers do not work that way.
If you want me
to displace matter with my mind
or enter an extended dream state
Like Nevada?
I have more than enough mystical energy.
But I'm afraid they'll have to find
a permanent human way
to return their power.
Break time, you grease monsters!
Come get some gullet pudding soup
before I eat it all myself.
I shall be in my chambers contemplating
my way out of this dimension.
Mmm.
And into one that is far less irritating
and greasy.
Thanks anyways, Skaelka,
but that's not quite what I meant.
We need a steady power source.
-Why is this?
-To keep us safe.
-[train horn blowing]
-[both gasp]
And, OK, also for fun.
[soft growls]
So, if I'm sticking around for a while,
and it looks like I am,
I'm gonna want a tricked out DJ platform,
a giant outdoor movie screen,
and a personal slushie machine.
But if anyone asks, safety!
Axe equals safety!
Yeah, OK, I guess.
Huh! Uh! Ahh!
-[laughing]
-Nothing against Skaelka's axe,
but we need a little more than that.
And I know just the thing!
Need lights at night to see
if anything is coming to eat you?
Uh, yeah, dude. That would be helpful.
What about an electrical barrier
to keep the zombie hoards away?
[making zombie noises]
Uhh, what are you guys doing?
All you need is a sustainable,
reliable power source.
-[continues zombie noises]
-You need a big generator!
Good, great. Where's it at?
-Uh, I actually don't know.
-Gah!
If this is gonna work as our home,
we need more power.
I really hope Jack found something.
Nice hammering!
Good job fixing that three-wheeler, Tres.
You're a triple threat!
-Guys! Guys!
-What's with the bone?
Oh, yeah, crazy thing!
I got zombie attacked by,
like, a million of them.
But I fought them all off.
[laughs] You should have seen me.
[grunting]
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Ha! Dow!
I'm sure that's exactly how it went.
And they were repelled
by the goo on this bone.
[all] Ugh!
-Like, Quint's sock-level repelled?
-Exactly!
-Badge of honor, my friends.
-Ugh.
No time for laundry. I'm a scientist!
True dat, bud. Here, I thought
maybe you could figure it out.
Hmm. It could come in handy.
I'll have to study it further.
So, you didn't find any power?
No, but[sighs].
I found something better.
The, you know, the place!
With the outer space dome,
and dried ice cream,
and you get to miss classes.
Wait, you mean the Planetarium?
That's it! I knew it started with a P.
I-it looks cool. We should all go.
Of course, the Planetarium!
It has a huge generator!
We can use it to power up
the whole town square!
Oh, well, then [nervous chuckle] yeah.
-I totally found power.
-[laughs] Yes, yes yes!
[laughing]
Guh!
Monsters only, sweet cheeks.
Dude, I love this joke-y,
tease-y rapport we got going.
[horn blows]
Beat it, flesh bag.
[mumbles] I got places to be, anyways.
[whimpers]
I can't tell you how much
I love school field trips.
Dude, school is extinct.
[grunting]
I've already set up a ton of stuff
at our place for when we have more power.
Oh, yeah. I got my own power plans.
[electric buzzing]
We have the power!
[cheering]
[electronic music pumping]
Ha! Didn't overdress
for that fantasy. Hmm?
[metal clanking]
Uh, hey! Wait up, you guys!
You think you'll be able to get the power
running right away, Quint?
Uhh, aah! Ah! Hopefully.
Let me just reorganize my schedule. Again.
But II can handle it.
If I can survive Thrull,
nothing can intimidate me again.
You got that right, Corporal Tiger Pants.
You ever been around Biggun
after he misses a nap?
-Now, that's scary.
-You'd know better than us.
You're practically President
of the Monster Fan Club.
[laughs] Ooh! Burn!
-What? Monsters are cool!
-Huh!
We got lots in common, is all.
We'rewe're all big, we're all strong.
You're all hairy.
Ooh, moded corroded.
Jeez, Dirk, if you like them so much,
why don't you marry them?
Uh, why don't you go take a hike?
Well, since we're doing that right now
Done and done.
Ooh, burn. Right? Right?
Uh, you guys can't congratulate
yourselves on your own burns.
It doesn't work like that.
[Jack] Such a good burn.
[screeching in distance]
There it is!
[screeching continues]
But what's on the roof?
That wasn't there before.
-[screeching]
-[Dirk] What the heck is it?
[June sighs] Wretches!
Ugh, man, the smell!
Yep, they stink of evil.
Wretches, Dozers, Blarg, Thrull.
-Um
-They all stink worse than Quint's socks!
If they were evil.
OK, here's the plan.
Quint, what gadget
did you bring to fix this?
I don't have a gadget for this.
I've been busy!
OK, OK. How about this?
Uhh!
Woof, woof, woof!
Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit.
Caw, caw, caw!
Hey, you stinking wretches!
-You think you're tough enough
-[screeching]
to battle me?
[screeching]
[screeching]
Wow, that was easy. Like, too easy.
Dude, don't say that.
Now things are gonna get not easy.
[doors creaking]
Oh.
So, where's this generator thing, anyway?
Now, this I do have a gadget for.
-[music jingle playing]
-Dr. Quint Baker's EMF Detector.
The electromagnetic
field radiation detector
can find any residual energy source.
That's genius, Doc Baker!
Pick up Quint Baker's EMF Detector.
It may be funny looking,
but it gets the job done.
Yeah, just like Jack. [laughs] Burn!
Hey!
OK. It's generator time.
[Quint] And if we get separated,
we meet back here.
[water dripping]
[growling]
-[June and Jack grunt]
-[zombies growling]
[Jack] Only one way across
the solar system.
Huh-uhh!
[low growling]
Hah!
Yeah-he-he!
[all sigh]
[beeping]
-[beeping faster]
-[gasps]
[all gasp]
[beeping]
[door creaking]
[beeping intensifies]
Behold!
[Jack] Way to go, bud!
Let's hope it works.
Mama needs a new pair of electrical shoes.
-Yeah!
-[cheering]
Oh, yeah.
It's better than I could have dreamed!
It's nerd-vana!
-[laughing]
-Ah.
-Huh!
-Yeah!
-[laughing]
[laughing]
[growling]
[all scream]
[laughing]
Yoo-hoo!
-[munching]
-Mmm.
Mmm.
It's like I just won the lottery!
Mmm. Science-y.
-[bleep]
-Got it!
Ah.
-[narrator] Space.
-Whoo! Best field trip ever!
[narrator]
The ever-present dome of endless wonder.
-And just when you think the universe
-Hmm?
can't get any more mysterious
[flapping]
Am I crazy, or do those stars look weird?
Yes.
Guys, I'm trying to watch a show.
What is it?
Oh, no!
[screeching]
Back to the generator!
[screeching]
[Dirk]
That's the biggest wretch I've ever seen!
Must work faster! Must work faster!
Uhh!
-[grunts]
-[screeching]
If a monster can carry this,
I can carry this.
[screeching]
-[panting]
-Come on, Dirk monster. Gah!
-[screaming]
-[screeching]
-Uhn.
-Uhn.
[growling]
[grunting]
[gasping]
[growling]
Huh!
Ah!
Huh!
[all grunting]
[screeching]
[panting]
[screeching]
Aah!
[all scream]
Aah!
[screeching]
-[panting]
-It's still OK!
Yeah. It's OK and freakin' heavy!
I think we got him.
Or, at least, the Planetarium did.
-[glass shatters]
-[screeching]
Nope!
[panting]
I can't just keep running.
[grunting]
[screeching]
[June] Guys, Plan Alpha!
[screeching]
[Quint] Hey! Space ice cream!
A delicious treat for humans
and wretches alike.
[screeching]
Aah!
Aah!
[whimpers]
Hey, you dumb post-apocalyptic pigeon!
Now!
Uhh. Got him!
-[screeching]
-[grunting]
Huh!
-Uhh!
-No, no, no, no, no!
[yelling]
[both] Uhh!
Uhh!
Hey, big boy! You missed me!
Your lunch is getting away! Aah!
-Jack, you're up!
-Uhh!
Aah! I'm getting too old for this!
-[grunting]
-[screeching]
Uhh! Ow, ow, ow!
Thorns, thorns, thorns!
[screeching]
[screeching]
Uhhow! Uhh-ow!
That's it.
We are officially mothballing Plan Alpha!
Ugh, this stuff really clings.
That wretch encounter in the Planetarium
was exceptionally scary.
Nevertheless,
still one of my top six field trips.
Totally worth it!
-We've got power!
-Civilization!
[with effort]
Uh, this thing is still heavy.
Less squawkin', more walkin'!
[Quint] I'm sure we could
find a dolly or something.
[June] Shh! Carrying weight
makes him feel needed.
[crackling]
Your reliance on machinery confounds me.
Eh, no offense, but your magic
wasn't exactly lighting this place up.
[chuckles] I'd wager my magic
against your machinery any day.
Is it ready?
Yeah, come on! We've got
slushie machines to juice up.
Almost got it.
There, done!
[machine starts]
[whirring]
[electric buzzing]
[cheering]
We have power!
-All right!
-Ha ha!
-Awesome!
-Yeah! Woo-hoo!
-Yeah!
-[barking]
[cheering]
Not too shabby, if I do say so myself.
Quint, it's amazing.
You rock!
That I do. That I do.
Looks like that bulb is out.
I'll get one of the monsters on it.
All right. That's enough
of a test for now.
-I still have to monitor the output.
-Hey.
Maybe just a minute longer?
Yeah, Quint. Maybe we
just enjoy the moment.
Indeed.
-Yes, indeed.
-[cheering]
[person on radio]
Repeating. This is
[static]
We are[static]
respond if you can[static]
We will try again in two[static]
[low screeching]
[crowd munching loudly]
[screech]
[screeching]
[intense organ music]
[screeching]
[chomping]
[theme music playing]