Regular Show (2010) s03e02 Episode Script
Bet to Be Blonde
I'm totally going to the bottom before you.
Yeah right! I bet you can`t shoot that barrel.
Oh yeah? Aw what? Don`t shoot the barrels, man! I bet you can`t get that power-up.
I can`t believe you did that! I was totally kidding, that slows you down! Check out my dude! I'm glad I picked the dude with the more aerodyamic hairstyle! THAT`S IT! PAUSE THE GAME! My dude's hairstyle is awesome, and I can totally kick your butt at this game! You sound pretty confident, care to wager on that? Yeah! If I win, you have to get your player's stupid haircut for a week! And if I win, you have to get your player's "awesome" haircut.
Fine, but you better not back down when I win though.
Of course, dude, I never back out of a bet.
We'll see about that.
What are you doing? I'm dying, dude! Get up, man! No, seriously, man! My stomach is crazy dry right now! I must be dehydrated! Ughh, what do you need? I need water.
I can't believe how lame you are sometimes.
Thanks, man.
Don't forget to put ice in it! Here's your water, you baby.
Thanks man! Now that my stomach isn't dry anymore, I'm totally going to beat you! I highly doubt it.
Okay, I'll just unpause it.
What the heck?! C'MON! In your face! You have to go blonde you LOSER- Rigby! You didn`t cheat, did you? What?! No! I never cheat on a bet! Now back to what I was saying before you interrupted me, in your face you have to go blonde now you LOSER! Oh my BLONDE! Ohh, that's it! I'm gonna start calling you Blondecai! How many Blondecai's does it take to order a cup of coffee? Just one! You! Hey Rigby, I`ve got your usual.
Can I get you anything, sir? Uhh, hey Margaret it's me, Mordecai.
Um I like your hair, Mordecai.
Excuse me.
Oh man! Who knew winning a bet could be so hilarious! I gotta use it, keep an eye on my coffee, blondie! Jerk.
Ahhh, it feels good to be the champ.
Yet I can't help but feel bad, somehow.
He ditched me!? Your friend was bashing you pretty hard there.
Dumb jokes about your hair? Yeah.
Yeah, we've heard them all.
Normal hairs are always jealous of our style.
And you, my friend, have style.
Really? Yeah man! You should totally hang out with us.
Hey Blondecai, who are these guys? Oh sorry man, we don't talk to normal hairs.
That's too bad, 'coz I've got a really funny joke for you.
How do you confuse a Blondecai? You don't! They're born that way! Hm, that was pretty good.
Here's a joke for you.
What's brown, black, and blue, and lying in a ditch? Uh, what? You, if you don't take that back right now! I'm just yanking your chain man, it's cool.
He's had enough.
Hey, why did the Blondecai jump over the clock? Excuse me.
So he could get some overtime! You know, because you're dumb.
Anyway, you wanna hang out? Nah, I'm actually gonna go hang out with the blondes.
Again? What do you do with those guys anyway? We play video games, watch movies, eat tacos, y'know, cool stuff! We do those things all the time.
You should stay here! And risk being made fun of? No thanks.
See, the guys tell me the follically normative environment of this park is way too blonde hostile.
Besides, the blondes are really cool.
But, but Mordecai! Hey, come on Mordecai.
Hey guys! Mordecai! You don't have to go! Oh yes I do! I'm Blondecai now, so I gotta hang out with these guys.
See you later dude! Mordecai, wait! Skips, Skips! I need your advice.
Let me guess, you cheated on a bet.
How did you know? I can tell by the shame in your eyes.
It's true, I cheated on a bet and now Mordecai has a weird haircut - and he's hanging out with all these creepy dudes an- - Rigby, you should have the courage to tell Mordecai you cheated.
Even though he'll be upset at first, Mordecai will respect your honesty.
Yeah.
I was with you until the honesty and courage part.
Is there any way I can get off scot-free? Wait, you're not taking my advice? I got it! I'll just call the bet off.
Call the bet off.
Okay.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
Mordecai, I wanna call off the bet.
What? No way! I never back out of a bet, remember? Forget about the bet! We can go back to you being Mordecai instead of Blondecai! To be honest, I kind of like being Blondecai now.
Without this bet, I never would've been able to make such cool friends.
Well, thanks again man.
Where are you going? Oh, the blondes are going to let me move in until the bet is over.
What!? No, that wasn't apart of the bet! Dude, chill! It's only going to be until the end of the week.
I don't know what your problem is.
Mordecai, wait! Mordecai, I have something to tell you! Hut hut hut hut hut! Alright great fun run gang.
Let's go play some video games! I'll catch up with you guys in a sec.
Okay! - Mordecai! - Huh? I've been trying to talk to you all day, but those blonde creeps keep cutting me off! Now I know you're trying to be nice and call off the bet, but the truth is, you've got skills and you got me.
- You got me good.
- No Mordecai, the truth is you don't have to do the bet 'coz I chea- chea- chee- chea- chea- chee- Wow, bless me.
That was the weirdest sneeze I've ever heard.
Well, it was good to catch up, but I better be going.
I'm gonna be late for my secret club initiation.
Initiation!? Yeah, apparently you get a really cool ring for joining.
In fact, there's actually only one more thing I have to do before becoming a member.
Uhh, what's that? Mordecai, what's going on? I need to blonde an outsider.
Bl- bl- blo- Mordecai, what's going on? We're preparing for the blondening.
The what? Brother Mordecai.
You have made a pact with the order of the blondes.
Here's a really cool ring to show that you're a member of our really cool club.
Now you know what has to be done.
Blonde the normal hair.
To death.
Mordecai, don't do this! I have to.
I gotta take the good with the bad.
A bet is a bet.
Plus this ring is really cool man.
Goodbye Rigby, thank you for helping me to realise my true self.
No Mordecai, you don't have to do this, you don't have to be a blonde.
The bet isn't even real because I cheated! I cheated on the video game! I'm sorry! That's all I needed to hear.
I knew you cheated, dude.
I was just waiting for you to come clean to teach you a lesson.
Oh, so these blondes are all just wearing wigs to teach me a lesson too? Uh, no.
They're actually an evil secret club.
We should probably run for our lives now.
Get them! What the heck dude, those things shoot lasers? Yes! Dude, peroxide? These guys aren't even real blondes! Look, an elevator! Kill them! And take the sacred ring from the outsider.
Cover me! Dude, what are you doing? Don't shoot the barrells! I'm not! They want their ring back- I'm gonna give it to them.
C'mon, c'mon! Oh man, that's not good.
Well Mordecai, I've learned my lesson.
Oh yeah? Yeah, it's not cool to cheat on bets.
And though my physical wounds are minor, this lesson will psychologically scar me for years to come.
So no cheating, huh? Would you care to wager on that? No.
Yeah right! I bet you can`t shoot that barrel.
Oh yeah? Aw what? Don`t shoot the barrels, man! I bet you can`t get that power-up.
I can`t believe you did that! I was totally kidding, that slows you down! Check out my dude! I'm glad I picked the dude with the more aerodyamic hairstyle! THAT`S IT! PAUSE THE GAME! My dude's hairstyle is awesome, and I can totally kick your butt at this game! You sound pretty confident, care to wager on that? Yeah! If I win, you have to get your player's stupid haircut for a week! And if I win, you have to get your player's "awesome" haircut.
Fine, but you better not back down when I win though.
Of course, dude, I never back out of a bet.
We'll see about that.
What are you doing? I'm dying, dude! Get up, man! No, seriously, man! My stomach is crazy dry right now! I must be dehydrated! Ughh, what do you need? I need water.
I can't believe how lame you are sometimes.
Thanks, man.
Don't forget to put ice in it! Here's your water, you baby.
Thanks man! Now that my stomach isn't dry anymore, I'm totally going to beat you! I highly doubt it.
Okay, I'll just unpause it.
What the heck?! C'MON! In your face! You have to go blonde you LOSER- Rigby! You didn`t cheat, did you? What?! No! I never cheat on a bet! Now back to what I was saying before you interrupted me, in your face you have to go blonde now you LOSER! Oh my BLONDE! Ohh, that's it! I'm gonna start calling you Blondecai! How many Blondecai's does it take to order a cup of coffee? Just one! You! Hey Rigby, I`ve got your usual.
Can I get you anything, sir? Uhh, hey Margaret it's me, Mordecai.
Um I like your hair, Mordecai.
Excuse me.
Oh man! Who knew winning a bet could be so hilarious! I gotta use it, keep an eye on my coffee, blondie! Jerk.
Ahhh, it feels good to be the champ.
Yet I can't help but feel bad, somehow.
He ditched me!? Your friend was bashing you pretty hard there.
Dumb jokes about your hair? Yeah.
Yeah, we've heard them all.
Normal hairs are always jealous of our style.
And you, my friend, have style.
Really? Yeah man! You should totally hang out with us.
Hey Blondecai, who are these guys? Oh sorry man, we don't talk to normal hairs.
That's too bad, 'coz I've got a really funny joke for you.
How do you confuse a Blondecai? You don't! They're born that way! Hm, that was pretty good.
Here's a joke for you.
What's brown, black, and blue, and lying in a ditch? Uh, what? You, if you don't take that back right now! I'm just yanking your chain man, it's cool.
He's had enough.
Hey, why did the Blondecai jump over the clock? Excuse me.
So he could get some overtime! You know, because you're dumb.
Anyway, you wanna hang out? Nah, I'm actually gonna go hang out with the blondes.
Again? What do you do with those guys anyway? We play video games, watch movies, eat tacos, y'know, cool stuff! We do those things all the time.
You should stay here! And risk being made fun of? No thanks.
See, the guys tell me the follically normative environment of this park is way too blonde hostile.
Besides, the blondes are really cool.
But, but Mordecai! Hey, come on Mordecai.
Hey guys! Mordecai! You don't have to go! Oh yes I do! I'm Blondecai now, so I gotta hang out with these guys.
See you later dude! Mordecai, wait! Skips, Skips! I need your advice.
Let me guess, you cheated on a bet.
How did you know? I can tell by the shame in your eyes.
It's true, I cheated on a bet and now Mordecai has a weird haircut - and he's hanging out with all these creepy dudes an- - Rigby, you should have the courage to tell Mordecai you cheated.
Even though he'll be upset at first, Mordecai will respect your honesty.
Yeah.
I was with you until the honesty and courage part.
Is there any way I can get off scot-free? Wait, you're not taking my advice? I got it! I'll just call the bet off.
Call the bet off.
Okay.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
Mordecai, I wanna call off the bet.
What? No way! I never back out of a bet, remember? Forget about the bet! We can go back to you being Mordecai instead of Blondecai! To be honest, I kind of like being Blondecai now.
Without this bet, I never would've been able to make such cool friends.
Well, thanks again man.
Where are you going? Oh, the blondes are going to let me move in until the bet is over.
What!? No, that wasn't apart of the bet! Dude, chill! It's only going to be until the end of the week.
I don't know what your problem is.
Mordecai, wait! Mordecai, I have something to tell you! Hut hut hut hut hut! Alright great fun run gang.
Let's go play some video games! I'll catch up with you guys in a sec.
Okay! - Mordecai! - Huh? I've been trying to talk to you all day, but those blonde creeps keep cutting me off! Now I know you're trying to be nice and call off the bet, but the truth is, you've got skills and you got me.
- You got me good.
- No Mordecai, the truth is you don't have to do the bet 'coz I chea- chea- chee- chea- chea- chee- Wow, bless me.
That was the weirdest sneeze I've ever heard.
Well, it was good to catch up, but I better be going.
I'm gonna be late for my secret club initiation.
Initiation!? Yeah, apparently you get a really cool ring for joining.
In fact, there's actually only one more thing I have to do before becoming a member.
Uhh, what's that? Mordecai, what's going on? I need to blonde an outsider.
Bl- bl- blo- Mordecai, what's going on? We're preparing for the blondening.
The what? Brother Mordecai.
You have made a pact with the order of the blondes.
Here's a really cool ring to show that you're a member of our really cool club.
Now you know what has to be done.
Blonde the normal hair.
To death.
Mordecai, don't do this! I have to.
I gotta take the good with the bad.
A bet is a bet.
Plus this ring is really cool man.
Goodbye Rigby, thank you for helping me to realise my true self.
No Mordecai, you don't have to do this, you don't have to be a blonde.
The bet isn't even real because I cheated! I cheated on the video game! I'm sorry! That's all I needed to hear.
I knew you cheated, dude.
I was just waiting for you to come clean to teach you a lesson.
Oh, so these blondes are all just wearing wigs to teach me a lesson too? Uh, no.
They're actually an evil secret club.
We should probably run for our lives now.
Get them! What the heck dude, those things shoot lasers? Yes! Dude, peroxide? These guys aren't even real blondes! Look, an elevator! Kill them! And take the sacred ring from the outsider.
Cover me! Dude, what are you doing? Don't shoot the barrells! I'm not! They want their ring back- I'm gonna give it to them.
C'mon, c'mon! Oh man, that's not good.
Well Mordecai, I've learned my lesson.
Oh yeah? Yeah, it's not cool to cheat on bets.
And though my physical wounds are minor, this lesson will psychologically scar me for years to come.
So no cheating, huh? Would you care to wager on that? No.