Robot Chicken s03e02 Episode Script
Squaw Bury Shortcake
It's alive! Sent from planet Krypton to aid Superman in the fight for justice, these are the Superpets Krypto the Superdog Streaky the Supercat Beppo the Supermonkey Comet the Superhorse Aah! Hissy the Supersnake.
They are the After a whole month in space, I can't wait to hug those loveable Superpets.
The Superpets! No! Ohh! Hello? Becky, this is S We well, is she there? One second.
Hello, Becky? Superman here.
Did you, uh No! No, Becky! Not next month! You were supposed to watch them this month! This month, Becky! I'm so sorry.
We just couldn't reduce his fever for the flavor of a Pringles.
We can't take much more of this! Send out the call, Ensign.
We need Voltron! Right away, Commander.
Together: Voltron force, go! We're being ripped apart! Don't you worry, Commander.
That Robeast will be singing a different tune once Voltron gets here.
Where the hell is Voltron?! Don't you worry, sir.
Voltron won't let us down.
Wait a minute, guys.
Something's not right.
Let's take it back to step six.
Is that Voltron? Yes, son.
He's right here.
It's all gonna be okay.
Voltron's on the scene! Voltron?! Where Where were you?! We got here at the speed of justice! Not even the real Voltron.
It's just that stupid vehicle one.
Voltron! Congratulations, Dr.
Pepper.
My god a planet where apes evolved from men? Ape.
What the fuck did you just say to me? You said "apes," plural.
There's only one ape me.
It kind of sucks, but, hey, I'm glad you're here, man.
We can play parcheesi.
Ohh! You maniacs! You blew it up! Me personally? No.
No, no, no.
I think there were some other apes, but they left on a spaceship like forever ago.
I'm a little fuzzy on the history.
Ohh, damn you! Damn you all to hell! Hey! Yeah! There you go! That's the spirit! Anyway, I'm gonna go get a smoothie.
You want one? Yes, I'd like that very much, new friend.
Hmm? Oh, I found it.
This is the problem right here.
Wait, wait, stop the execution! The Governor called! Oh, that's me always a day late and dollar short! That's the way it goes, but how to feed the family? Time pilots, Carmen has stolen the Brooklyn Bridge.
We need you to head to the year it was built and bring back that bridge.
You heard her, kids.
We've got to retrieve the Brooklyn Bridge.
Uh, I got to take this.
Janine, I'm doing the show.
I told you we'd talk about it later.
I don't want to talk about it later.
Well, I have more to say.
No, now.
No, not now.
What the fuck you want me to lose my job? I don't care.
Oh, nice.
He's there now, isn't he? You mother fucking whore! Well, then I want my jacket back! No way.
Yes, way! It's my fucking jacket! It was a gift! No, a gift is something you give someone you love, you dumb bitch! Uh, hey, kids.
Uh, that was the chief again, and she said she made a mistake.
Carmen didn't steal the Brooklyn Bridge after all.
She actually stole a magical leather jacket, and we need your help to get it back.
So, are you with me? What's so mag And we're off! Aren't we supposed to be answering questions? I'll give you a question What year did that fucking bitch ruin my life? Don't know? Trick question! She ruined three fucking years of my life! Is this Franklin Street? You whore! I loved you! And you fucked it all up.
I gave this to you because it meant something, stupid.
That was the day you said you loved me.
What was that day, kids? Together: November 8th.
November fucking 8th.
When did firemen first start using poles, Susan? Bingo! Hooray! Carmen is safe.
Where are I ask the questions! L- I-I-I swear it happened in battle.
Hi! What's up? Konnichiwa! Bienvenu! I'm entrepreneur and alleged rapist Joe Francis.
When I started "Girls Gone Wild," I had no idea that 10 years of semi-consensual orgies would leave me so desensitized.
But look don't feel a thing! Anyway, my quest to achieve an erection led me to some dark territory, and now you can come along for the ride.
Ohh ho ho! Hurts so good! We have such sights to show you.
And the "Girls Gone Wild" cameras catch it all.
You won't believe how far these girls are willing to go.
You're 18, right? Yeah, sure! Whoo! I want to be popular! The Cenobites have used up every cheap thrill on hell and Earth, but they've never done anything like this.
Jealous? Order now! Hyah! Rah! Drac, where the hell have you been? Half the day is gone! Ugh, I was on a stakeout.
Well, we've got a situation.
Terrorists have called in a threat, but our suspect's not talking.
Leave me alone with him.
I'll find out what he knows.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
L- listen.
Listen.
I've changed my mind.
I'll tell you about the terrorists and their bomb plot.
I'll tell you everything.
It's a little late for that.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
B- but i've decided to He wouldn't talk.
Damn it, Drac! Well, we've still got three more suspects.
Can I get you something to eat? No, I'm on a liquid diet.
I said yes! Yes, I'll tell you! Aah! The bomb's on flight 421! But, Drac, it's already in the air! Nobody move! We've got a bomb! Whoa! What in the huh?! Excuse me, sir.
You're gonna have to return to your se ohh! What? Drac, the hijacker's in the cockpit.
The bomb's gonna blow in the next five minutes if we don't meet his demands! Everybody down! Get down! Where's the bomb? Bite me.
Where's the bomb?! You'll know when you're dead.
I am dead.
Aah! Throw it! Wait for it.
But it's a bomb! Wait for it.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa And now! Eh? What is that? Is that a Yeah? How'd it go, Drac? Well, I took care of the bomb, but i'm afraid all the passengers are dead.
But we're not dead.
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # Ba-gawk! Bawk.
They are the After a whole month in space, I can't wait to hug those loveable Superpets.
The Superpets! No! Ohh! Hello? Becky, this is S We well, is she there? One second.
Hello, Becky? Superman here.
Did you, uh No! No, Becky! Not next month! You were supposed to watch them this month! This month, Becky! I'm so sorry.
We just couldn't reduce his fever for the flavor of a Pringles.
We can't take much more of this! Send out the call, Ensign.
We need Voltron! Right away, Commander.
Together: Voltron force, go! We're being ripped apart! Don't you worry, Commander.
That Robeast will be singing a different tune once Voltron gets here.
Where the hell is Voltron?! Don't you worry, sir.
Voltron won't let us down.
Wait a minute, guys.
Something's not right.
Let's take it back to step six.
Is that Voltron? Yes, son.
He's right here.
It's all gonna be okay.
Voltron's on the scene! Voltron?! Where Where were you?! We got here at the speed of justice! Not even the real Voltron.
It's just that stupid vehicle one.
Voltron! Congratulations, Dr.
Pepper.
My god a planet where apes evolved from men? Ape.
What the fuck did you just say to me? You said "apes," plural.
There's only one ape me.
It kind of sucks, but, hey, I'm glad you're here, man.
We can play parcheesi.
Ohh! You maniacs! You blew it up! Me personally? No.
No, no, no.
I think there were some other apes, but they left on a spaceship like forever ago.
I'm a little fuzzy on the history.
Ohh, damn you! Damn you all to hell! Hey! Yeah! There you go! That's the spirit! Anyway, I'm gonna go get a smoothie.
You want one? Yes, I'd like that very much, new friend.
Hmm? Oh, I found it.
This is the problem right here.
Wait, wait, stop the execution! The Governor called! Oh, that's me always a day late and dollar short! That's the way it goes, but how to feed the family? Time pilots, Carmen has stolen the Brooklyn Bridge.
We need you to head to the year it was built and bring back that bridge.
You heard her, kids.
We've got to retrieve the Brooklyn Bridge.
Uh, I got to take this.
Janine, I'm doing the show.
I told you we'd talk about it later.
I don't want to talk about it later.
Well, I have more to say.
No, now.
No, not now.
What the fuck you want me to lose my job? I don't care.
Oh, nice.
He's there now, isn't he? You mother fucking whore! Well, then I want my jacket back! No way.
Yes, way! It's my fucking jacket! It was a gift! No, a gift is something you give someone you love, you dumb bitch! Uh, hey, kids.
Uh, that was the chief again, and she said she made a mistake.
Carmen didn't steal the Brooklyn Bridge after all.
She actually stole a magical leather jacket, and we need your help to get it back.
So, are you with me? What's so mag And we're off! Aren't we supposed to be answering questions? I'll give you a question What year did that fucking bitch ruin my life? Don't know? Trick question! She ruined three fucking years of my life! Is this Franklin Street? You whore! I loved you! And you fucked it all up.
I gave this to you because it meant something, stupid.
That was the day you said you loved me.
What was that day, kids? Together: November 8th.
November fucking 8th.
When did firemen first start using poles, Susan? Bingo! Hooray! Carmen is safe.
Where are I ask the questions! L- I-I-I swear it happened in battle.
Hi! What's up? Konnichiwa! Bienvenu! I'm entrepreneur and alleged rapist Joe Francis.
When I started "Girls Gone Wild," I had no idea that 10 years of semi-consensual orgies would leave me so desensitized.
But look don't feel a thing! Anyway, my quest to achieve an erection led me to some dark territory, and now you can come along for the ride.
Ohh ho ho! Hurts so good! We have such sights to show you.
And the "Girls Gone Wild" cameras catch it all.
You won't believe how far these girls are willing to go.
You're 18, right? Yeah, sure! Whoo! I want to be popular! The Cenobites have used up every cheap thrill on hell and Earth, but they've never done anything like this.
Jealous? Order now! Hyah! Rah! Drac, where the hell have you been? Half the day is gone! Ugh, I was on a stakeout.
Well, we've got a situation.
Terrorists have called in a threat, but our suspect's not talking.
Leave me alone with him.
I'll find out what he knows.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
L- listen.
Listen.
I've changed my mind.
I'll tell you about the terrorists and their bomb plot.
I'll tell you everything.
It's a little late for that.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
B- but i've decided to He wouldn't talk.
Damn it, Drac! Well, we've still got three more suspects.
Can I get you something to eat? No, I'm on a liquid diet.
I said yes! Yes, I'll tell you! Aah! The bomb's on flight 421! But, Drac, it's already in the air! Nobody move! We've got a bomb! Whoa! What in the huh?! Excuse me, sir.
You're gonna have to return to your se ohh! What? Drac, the hijacker's in the cockpit.
The bomb's gonna blow in the next five minutes if we don't meet his demands! Everybody down! Get down! Where's the bomb? Bite me.
Where's the bomb?! You'll know when you're dead.
I am dead.
Aah! Throw it! Wait for it.
But it's a bomb! Wait for it.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa And now! Eh? What is that? Is that a Yeah? How'd it go, Drac? Well, I took care of the bomb, but i'm afraid all the passengers are dead.
But we're not dead.
# Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk # # Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk # Ba-gawk! Bawk.