The Epic Tales of Captain Underpants (2018) s03e02 Episode Script
The Angry Abnormal Atrocities of the Astute Animal Agressors
1 Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-- This is George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
George is the kid on the left with the tie and the flattop.
Harold is the one on the right with the T-shirt and the bad haircut.
Remember that, now.
They're digging under the wall Mr.
Krupp built to keep them apart, through 20-ish yards of loosely-packed dirt.
That's the length of nine tall guys, just shy of half a whale.
Because nothing could stand in the way of their friendship.
Uh-- Harold? George? Except a grouchy badger.
So George and Harold make comic books -We're cool! -Me, too! Now they're summering at summer camp And Mr.
Krupp is, too -Blah, blah, blah, blah! - Once they used the hypno-ring And first they made him dance Then accidentally, kinda on purpose Turned him into Captain Underpants Tra-la-la! With a snap, he's the Captain Flying through the trees And don't forget when he gets wet - You're sure to feel the squeeze! -Blah, blah, blah! Put it all together What could possibly go wrong? Now this is the end Of the Captain Underpants song! - By George Beard and Harold Hutchins - Tra-la-camp! The Angry Abnormal Atrocities of the Astute Animal Aggressors.
Chapter 1: Summercramp.
I didn't think it was possible, but our new secret underground bunker is as cool as our treehouse! And these roasted marshmallows are gonna taste-- Aw, who are we kidding? We gotta get Krupp to put us in the same camp.
Our marshmallows are plastic cups.
And our campfire is a sleeping badger.
Who's not sleeping.
As the boys were scheming ways to get together, Krupp was scheming ways to get a LeisureMyLand.
Ah! The LeisureMyLand.
All I have to do is sweet-talk 'em into giving me a camp director's discount and I'll spend summer relaxing on a rubber island.
And it'll be mine! All mine! What do you mean this petting zoo's only for kids? This rubber island is mine and so is that goat.
Yagh! Hello? Yes! I would like to buy a LeisureMyLand, please.
I'm just a little short on cash.
Like, about eight ahem-- ty thousand.
Yes, $80,000.
I know that's how much it costs.
That's why I'm saying I'm a little short-- What? What are you talking-- Quiet out there! Listen, I think we got off on the wrong foot.
I said I-- Hello? Is louder better if I talk? I'm trying-- Quiet! Hello? Agh! Oh-hh! How am I supposed to sweet-talk them into giving me a free LeisureMyLand with all these annoying joy noises? Argh! I gotta get rid of these kids! I demand ideas for getting rid of the kids! Happy Krupp? How 'bout a sing-a-long, Angry Krupp? Too uplifting! Weepy Krupp? Cry-a-long? Too depressing! - Hungry Krupp? - Let's eat them.
Too filling! How about sending them on a nature walk? Deep in the woods where we can't hear them? Too annoying! Wait, I've got it! We send them on a nature walk deep in the woods where we can't hear them! Hey, that was my idea! -You're all plotting against me! -Stop being paranoid, Paranoid Krupp! Today you'll go on a nature walk.
Far away.
-How far? -Out of hearing range.
-You're gonna lead a hike? -Krupp gets winded ringing a doorbell.
Whew! Wow! Me? I'll never go in the woods! That's where the possums are.
Ah, yes, young Krupp and the possum.
Hey there, little guy.
Hey! That's-- ugh! Oh, my sandwich.
Ahem! So Counselor Mr.
Meaner will lead Camp Lake Summer Camp, and his sister Misty Meaner will lead Lake Summer Camp Camp.
This is actually worse than Krupp.
Impressive.
Wow, Meaner's sister looks exactly like him.
It's like they took Meaner and added a ponytail to save money.
But we would never do that.
Hey! Break it up! I said-- oh! Agh! Ow! Oh! Agh! Ow! Ow! - Enough! - Yep-yep-yep-yep.
Mr.
Meaner, you're a gym teacher! Act like it! No, I'm Misty yep-yep-yep Meaner.
Are you sure? You're the same person as far as I can tell.
Chapter 2: Nature Crock.
All right, campers! We're gonna yep-yep-yep go through the thorn patch, over the waterfall, and across the exploding lava rapids.
Uh, can we just go on the normal trail? What, you got a problem with lava? Yeah.
I think we all do.
Tough yep-yep-yep-yep tomatoes! Can we at least put you down? You got a problem carrying a full-sized adult on your shoulders? Yes! Look, I don't speak what you're talking.
What I think you said is you want to give me a free LeisureMyLand since I-- No! We had a deal! Well, I guess I have no choice.
- I have to learn what you're talking.
- Wait, what? Fresh worms.
Doesn't get any better than this.
Yikes! You look like a butcher shop that went outta business.
Put on this friendship bracelet I made ya.
Be-gah-hh! George! The nature walk.
So awful! There was lava! Wait, why aren't you jacked-up like me? Well, Melvin hates nature and stuff, so he invented the BeastBooster 2000 to make smart animals to help us on the walk! They weren't like talking and performing-surgery smart, but they were still amazing! Here's a buck.
Buy yourself some yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah talent! Ha! Krupp's sending us all on another nature walk tomorrow.
I can't hack it! Easy, Harold.
Hey, let's watch some imaginary TV.
Okay.
Advancimals They're advanced animals We put zero thought into this And now it's a show They're animals that think That stuff blows up Please buy a lunch box! I love that show.
So, you feel better? Not really.
For some reason, my TV mind is set to Spanish.
¡Advancimales! ¡Son animales avanzados! ¡No hicimos ningún esfuerzo y ahora es un show! ¡Animales que piensan y hay explosión, compren loncheras! Don't worry, amigo.
We'll fix this together.
Hey, let's do the one thing that always gives us an idea! -Chumash sweat lodge? -Close.
Chapter Three: Captain Underpants And The Perilous Possum Army-- By George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
So, a long time ago, or not there was an evil camp director named Mister er, Brupp.
Yeah.
Brupp! And he hated possum creatures and their teeth and stuff, so he enslaved them to do his bidding and make him ricotta French toast and clean the back of his car.
But mostly he used them to scare kids at camp, so they like wouldn't do fun stuff that annoyed him, like tether ham and volley ham.
Here they come! Possum! Ree-shaza! Possum scare! Luckily, Captain Underpants was taking a class at an adult school thing nearby on "how to make your laundry whites even whiter"! Impossible! No, watch and learn! Wow! When he heard.
"Ree-shaza! And was all, "That's the sound of possums using fear as a weapon to keep kids from fun stuff like volley ham!" So he smashed through the wall even though the door was right there.
Ker-swak! But he was deep in the building so he had to keep smashing through a bunch of walls.
Booz! Wow, that's a buncha walls.
Then he flew in to save the day.
Flying noise! Z-zz-zz! Z-zz-zz! Z-zz-zz! Then there were so many possums for Captain Underpants to fight, but he was able to trick them by, like, pointing at something.
"Look out behind you, possums!" Then smacking them with a wedgie whip.
Kerslap! "This is too easy.
The possums are too dummy!" So Captain Underpants brought them all to his adult school thing to learn stuff good and all.
The possums got smart and were so grateful, they got rid of Brupp so he had to live in a cave.
Yay! The end.
That's it.
We gotta use a possum to scare away Krupp.
-Then, no more nature walks! -And we can finally be in the same camp! Wait, where did we get the slide projector? Shh, shh, shh! Harold, come on.
All right, well, how do we convince a possum? Simple, pal.
We use Melvin's BeastBooster 2000 to make a possum smart.
Then he can follow our instructions and scare Krupp away.
Yes! Secret underground fort handshake! -Needs some work.
-Yeah.
Anyway, I'll get the BeastBooster.
You find a possum.
Oh! ¿Por qué tengo que conseguir la zarigüeya? Your brain is set to Spanish again.
Kinda cool, right? Why do I have to get the possum? - Because it's your turn.
- Oh.
SÃ, sÃ.
Hey, Melvin.
Uh the rabbit refuses to play the keytar! He says it's not as cool as the other instruments! What? There is no cooler instrument! I'm gonna show this rabbit about cool.
George had the BeastBooster 2000, but there was still no Harold and no possum.
I got a possum! That's not a possum! - I got a possum! - That's not a possum! Sorry! It's dark out there.
Take a flashlight! Oh! Finally, a possum! -Ew! -I know, right? Melvin has it set to "Basic Smart.
" Let's turn it up to "Talky Smart.
" It's working! I-- I-- I don't understand why humans think it's okay to abduct animals like this.
Wait, is that me? I can speak? What have you done to me? What have you done? Easy, little fella.
We just made you smart.
We should name him.
Possums are pretty testy, so, "Ragely"? J.
Snarlingtooth! Boys, I apologize for my outburst.
I have a bit of a temper.
And this is all very new to me-- names, talking, thinking! I mean, I'm just a possum! I'm scared! And alone! And these walls are closing in! Hey, how would you like to have all the trash you could ever want? All the sweet, beautiful trash I want? How? Tell me now! Every night, a mean guy named Krupp locks up all the trash in the dumpsters outside the mess hall.
Not my arm! We'll get you the key if you scare Krupp so bad, he never comes back.
Then it's Trash City, baby.
Hmm.
Trash City baby.
Chapter 4: The Taming of the Not So Shrewd.
As you might say in your language But you have to give me a free LeisureMyLand! I learned what you're talking for you! - Ahem! - Agh! Hello.
I'm here on behalf of-- George and-- I must ask you to stop screaming.
Because loud noises upset me! Agh! I'm sorry.
My temper got the best of me.
No, it was perfect! You scared him silly.
-I bet he's gone for good! -So, that takes care of Krupp.
-What about the counselors? -I'll handle the Meaners.
Erica? What're you doing here? I've been pretending to be a foreign company all day to mess with Krupp.
What else can you do around here? As for the Meaners, I've got their number.
-Seven? -Twelve? -It's a figure of speech.
-Is the figure 54? -Is the figure 32? -It's a figure of speech.
-Is the figure 28? -Is the figure 39? -It's a figure of speech.
-Six hundred and five? -Is it 92? -It's a figure of speech.
- Seven? - Twelve? I heard working out is actually bad for you.
Well, remember what yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah Dad always used to say? Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah "Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah"? "Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah.
" - I miss him.
- Heads up.
The FBI is coming to check your jump-rope licenses.
-Is that a thing? -I don't know.
But I don't yep-yep-yep-yep-yep got one.
Wow.
Too easy.
All right, everybody, keep chewing.
You, put that over there.
And that goes over there! And you, put that over there.
The adults are gone! And we're tearing down this wall! From now on, we're one camp! United! -And the kids are in charge! -Which means tonight, we party! But first, today we party! "Beware of animals.
Particularly cruel, heartless possums.
" "Animals burp loud.
" Nice.
And, Ragely, as promised, welcome to Trash City, baby.
To the victors belong the spoils.
-Yeah, there'll be spoiled stuff in there.
-All right, it's party time! Now that was a day of summer camp! And this glamping party is the perfect way to end it! "Glamping"? You mean "glamour camping"? -Hate to say it, but this isn't it.
-What do you mean? -Wigs are super glamorous.
-Also super itchy.
Because those aren't wigs.
Those are pieces of insulation.
There he is! Ragely, the titan of trash! The possum that made all of this possible! Here's a half-eaten apple, bro! - What gives, Rage? - We don't want trash! Now that we're smart, animals don't want what you throw away.
We want what you have.
The good stuff.
Food without bite marks.
Outdoor movies.
Pants.
Ah, you want pants? We can make that happen.
-You want my wig too? -Pah! That's a piece of insulation.
Not if you pretend.
Too little, too late! The damage is done! So your luxuries are now our luxuries! And you will be our beasts of burden, baby! Chapter 5: Critter Critter Chicken Dinner.
Here are your rolls and butter, Master Ragely.
Good work, servant.
Now, pamper me.
Ah-hh -Hey, can the kids eat now? -'Cause we're pretty hungry.
Here's the trash key.
To the losers belong the spoils! Aw, man! We gotta eat spoiled stuff? Just as animals once did! And then you will sleep in cages.
And then you will fight for our amusement! And you! Keep dancing, or you'll be our next course! Please don't make me rhumba.
I don't have the hips for it.
We gotta do something! But these animals are watching us like hawks, especially that hawk! Hey, Master Ragely? We need to get more bread and butter.
What? Well, be quick about it, opposable thumbs.
It's time for Captain Underpants.
Yep.
But Krupp is MIA.
How are we gonna find him? Well, I guess this is where we start.
Good thing Krupp is so Krupp-shaped.
-Here, look! -And another one! -But the trail ends here.
-Which means we've got him.
I give up! I pledge allegiance to the possums! Oh, George and Harold.
What are you doing here? Are you working for the possums? - Tra-la-leaves! Hey, are we roughing it? Nice! Let's use these pine cones as toilet paper! First, we gotta deal with some talking animals.
That sounds more fun.
I'll just save this baby for later.
Find me those boys.
And some more bread and butter.
- Or else.
- Guess what? I have bread and butter.
How crazy is that? Too funny.
Anyway, who do I wedgie? -All of them! -But they're so cute.
Don't fall for it.
It's a trick.
How can you doubt those faces? They're adorable-- Chapter 6: The Incredibly Graphic Violence Chapter, presented in Smack-O-Rama.
Because violence is okay if it's part of a carnival game.
I was gonna smack you, but you're too cute to be dangerous.
Agh! Aw-ww! I can't smack you either because you're even cuter.
Ugh! Aw-ww! You'd think I'd learned my lesson, but I haven't.
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! How can a human with so much power be so easily fooled? I mean, we literally tricked him the same way three times.
Ragely's too smart for Captain Underpants! Yeah, Cap's not the sharpest tooth in the shark's mouth.
We need to figure out a way to help Captain Underpants.
Let's roll.
Let's cook this naked dope.
You, socially awkward human inventor.
Invent a restraint from which the mostly naked super-dolt can't escape.
-Can I stop dancing while I work? -No! How do we help Captain Underpants outsmart Ragely? Would a tutor work? Wait a minute.
Uh How do you open this thing? ¡Advancimales! Son animales avanzados Of course! We need to fight smart animals with smarter animals.
You mean, the smartest animals! Thinkcoon! Buffalobe! We've dis-ss-covered the cure for war! Oh, no, it's-ss turning blue! Abandon hover-lab! Yeah, we need to make our own Advancimals! Now we just gotta figure out where to find a raccoon, a snake and a water buffalo.
- Yeah! - And we found the outfits and accessories from the cartoon! What are the odds? Really good, because we're almost out of show.
"Super Talky Smart.
" I don't want to be roasted, but I bet I'd taste great! The laser-ropes are an exceptional invention.
It's a shame you don't dance as well as you invent.
Please, my feet are killing me! Less talk, more tap! It's over, fleshy dope.
I know your friends will try to rescue you.
And then I'll make them side dishes to you, the main course.
You really should marinate us overnight or we'll be hard to chew! Are you cooking you, or am I? Why don't you dance with someone your own size? Yeah-- brain size, that is.
We are the Advanc-ss-imals.
I am Sss-ss Sss-ss Sss Smartaconda.
And no matter what you're thinking, - I've already thought of it.
- Interesting.
It seems we have a real chess match on our hands.
Checkmate.
I win! Or did Smartaconda let you win? To keep you busy while Melvin helped us free Captain Underpants? - Tra-la-look! I'm free! - That's right! I reset the photonmoleculatrix of the laser ropes to re-chronify the omni-- -He cut 'em with scissors.
-That's the dummy version, but, yes.
Because I'm done dancing! Uh-- unless you win and I'll dance some more.
Look Well, I guess there's nothing left to do but fight! Animals, attack! Oh, no! - I'm paralyzed by precious! - Not for long! Good call! Hey! Can you guys bark or squeak so I know where to punch? -No.
-Worth a shot! Tra-la-la! And so it began-- an epic battle of will, of strength, of extreme cuteness.
The battle raged for years for generations for eons! For at least four minutes until it was finally done.
-Who won? -We did! Wait, I hear one more animal! No, no, no, no! That's Mr.
Krupp's car.
Take that, wombat! Huh! Hah! Is it a wombat? All right, I've recalibrated the BeastBooster 2000.
This will make the animals dumb again and restore the natural order.
Wait! No! We gave them the gift of smart.
We can't just take it away.
Of course we can! Being smart made them fight us! No! The way we treated them made them fight us.
George is right.
It's kinda our fault.
What? That's crazy talk! We have to dumb them all down! No-oo! Ugh! - Oh, my! - He'll be fine.
And you animals can stay with us as long as you want.
Nay, we must forge our own path.
We will make our home in the wild.
A utopia for animalkind.
We will succ-ss-eed where humanity has failed.
You guys should make a sandwich shop where the bread is another sandwich! Sandwich Sandwiches! Come, my animal brethren.
Our lives-ss await! Oh, oh! What about pizza with no cheese, sauce or toppings? That's-ss just bread! -We did it.
So good.
-No, we didn't.
As soon as we turn Captain Underpants back into Krupp he'll separate us again.
Boys, you gave me the gift of smart and you let me keep it.
Is there any way I can return the favor? Well, there is one way.
I have an office now-ww! Marketing, we're working through lunch! Order sandwich sandwiches! Why am I wet? Where are my pants? Agh! What do you want?! We wanna be in the same camp.
- Ha! Never! - Either they're together or we're together forever.
Or, push the button.
Welcome home ss-ss Just felt like doing that.
George is the kid on the left with the tie and the flattop.
Harold is the one on the right with the T-shirt and the bad haircut.
Remember that, now.
They're digging under the wall Mr.
Krupp built to keep them apart, through 20-ish yards of loosely-packed dirt.
That's the length of nine tall guys, just shy of half a whale.
Because nothing could stand in the way of their friendship.
Uh-- Harold? George? Except a grouchy badger.
So George and Harold make comic books -We're cool! -Me, too! Now they're summering at summer camp And Mr.
Krupp is, too -Blah, blah, blah, blah! - Once they used the hypno-ring And first they made him dance Then accidentally, kinda on purpose Turned him into Captain Underpants Tra-la-la! With a snap, he's the Captain Flying through the trees And don't forget when he gets wet - You're sure to feel the squeeze! -Blah, blah, blah! Put it all together What could possibly go wrong? Now this is the end Of the Captain Underpants song! - By George Beard and Harold Hutchins - Tra-la-camp! The Angry Abnormal Atrocities of the Astute Animal Aggressors.
Chapter 1: Summercramp.
I didn't think it was possible, but our new secret underground bunker is as cool as our treehouse! And these roasted marshmallows are gonna taste-- Aw, who are we kidding? We gotta get Krupp to put us in the same camp.
Our marshmallows are plastic cups.
And our campfire is a sleeping badger.
Who's not sleeping.
As the boys were scheming ways to get together, Krupp was scheming ways to get a LeisureMyLand.
Ah! The LeisureMyLand.
All I have to do is sweet-talk 'em into giving me a camp director's discount and I'll spend summer relaxing on a rubber island.
And it'll be mine! All mine! What do you mean this petting zoo's only for kids? This rubber island is mine and so is that goat.
Yagh! Hello? Yes! I would like to buy a LeisureMyLand, please.
I'm just a little short on cash.
Like, about eight ahem-- ty thousand.
Yes, $80,000.
I know that's how much it costs.
That's why I'm saying I'm a little short-- What? What are you talking-- Quiet out there! Listen, I think we got off on the wrong foot.
I said I-- Hello? Is louder better if I talk? I'm trying-- Quiet! Hello? Agh! Oh-hh! How am I supposed to sweet-talk them into giving me a free LeisureMyLand with all these annoying joy noises? Argh! I gotta get rid of these kids! I demand ideas for getting rid of the kids! Happy Krupp? How 'bout a sing-a-long, Angry Krupp? Too uplifting! Weepy Krupp? Cry-a-long? Too depressing! - Hungry Krupp? - Let's eat them.
Too filling! How about sending them on a nature walk? Deep in the woods where we can't hear them? Too annoying! Wait, I've got it! We send them on a nature walk deep in the woods where we can't hear them! Hey, that was my idea! -You're all plotting against me! -Stop being paranoid, Paranoid Krupp! Today you'll go on a nature walk.
Far away.
-How far? -Out of hearing range.
-You're gonna lead a hike? -Krupp gets winded ringing a doorbell.
Whew! Wow! Me? I'll never go in the woods! That's where the possums are.
Ah, yes, young Krupp and the possum.
Hey there, little guy.
Hey! That's-- ugh! Oh, my sandwich.
Ahem! So Counselor Mr.
Meaner will lead Camp Lake Summer Camp, and his sister Misty Meaner will lead Lake Summer Camp Camp.
This is actually worse than Krupp.
Impressive.
Wow, Meaner's sister looks exactly like him.
It's like they took Meaner and added a ponytail to save money.
But we would never do that.
Hey! Break it up! I said-- oh! Agh! Ow! Oh! Agh! Ow! Ow! - Enough! - Yep-yep-yep-yep.
Mr.
Meaner, you're a gym teacher! Act like it! No, I'm Misty yep-yep-yep Meaner.
Are you sure? You're the same person as far as I can tell.
Chapter 2: Nature Crock.
All right, campers! We're gonna yep-yep-yep go through the thorn patch, over the waterfall, and across the exploding lava rapids.
Uh, can we just go on the normal trail? What, you got a problem with lava? Yeah.
I think we all do.
Tough yep-yep-yep-yep tomatoes! Can we at least put you down? You got a problem carrying a full-sized adult on your shoulders? Yes! Look, I don't speak what you're talking.
What I think you said is you want to give me a free LeisureMyLand since I-- No! We had a deal! Well, I guess I have no choice.
- I have to learn what you're talking.
- Wait, what? Fresh worms.
Doesn't get any better than this.
Yikes! You look like a butcher shop that went outta business.
Put on this friendship bracelet I made ya.
Be-gah-hh! George! The nature walk.
So awful! There was lava! Wait, why aren't you jacked-up like me? Well, Melvin hates nature and stuff, so he invented the BeastBooster 2000 to make smart animals to help us on the walk! They weren't like talking and performing-surgery smart, but they were still amazing! Here's a buck.
Buy yourself some yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah talent! Ha! Krupp's sending us all on another nature walk tomorrow.
I can't hack it! Easy, Harold.
Hey, let's watch some imaginary TV.
Okay.
Advancimals They're advanced animals We put zero thought into this And now it's a show They're animals that think That stuff blows up Please buy a lunch box! I love that show.
So, you feel better? Not really.
For some reason, my TV mind is set to Spanish.
¡Advancimales! ¡Son animales avanzados! ¡No hicimos ningún esfuerzo y ahora es un show! ¡Animales que piensan y hay explosión, compren loncheras! Don't worry, amigo.
We'll fix this together.
Hey, let's do the one thing that always gives us an idea! -Chumash sweat lodge? -Close.
Chapter Three: Captain Underpants And The Perilous Possum Army-- By George Beard and Harold Hutchins.
So, a long time ago, or not there was an evil camp director named Mister er, Brupp.
Yeah.
Brupp! And he hated possum creatures and their teeth and stuff, so he enslaved them to do his bidding and make him ricotta French toast and clean the back of his car.
But mostly he used them to scare kids at camp, so they like wouldn't do fun stuff that annoyed him, like tether ham and volley ham.
Here they come! Possum! Ree-shaza! Possum scare! Luckily, Captain Underpants was taking a class at an adult school thing nearby on "how to make your laundry whites even whiter"! Impossible! No, watch and learn! Wow! When he heard.
"Ree-shaza! And was all, "That's the sound of possums using fear as a weapon to keep kids from fun stuff like volley ham!" So he smashed through the wall even though the door was right there.
Ker-swak! But he was deep in the building so he had to keep smashing through a bunch of walls.
Booz! Wow, that's a buncha walls.
Then he flew in to save the day.
Flying noise! Z-zz-zz! Z-zz-zz! Z-zz-zz! Then there were so many possums for Captain Underpants to fight, but he was able to trick them by, like, pointing at something.
"Look out behind you, possums!" Then smacking them with a wedgie whip.
Kerslap! "This is too easy.
The possums are too dummy!" So Captain Underpants brought them all to his adult school thing to learn stuff good and all.
The possums got smart and were so grateful, they got rid of Brupp so he had to live in a cave.
Yay! The end.
That's it.
We gotta use a possum to scare away Krupp.
-Then, no more nature walks! -And we can finally be in the same camp! Wait, where did we get the slide projector? Shh, shh, shh! Harold, come on.
All right, well, how do we convince a possum? Simple, pal.
We use Melvin's BeastBooster 2000 to make a possum smart.
Then he can follow our instructions and scare Krupp away.
Yes! Secret underground fort handshake! -Needs some work.
-Yeah.
Anyway, I'll get the BeastBooster.
You find a possum.
Oh! ¿Por qué tengo que conseguir la zarigüeya? Your brain is set to Spanish again.
Kinda cool, right? Why do I have to get the possum? - Because it's your turn.
- Oh.
SÃ, sÃ.
Hey, Melvin.
Uh the rabbit refuses to play the keytar! He says it's not as cool as the other instruments! What? There is no cooler instrument! I'm gonna show this rabbit about cool.
George had the BeastBooster 2000, but there was still no Harold and no possum.
I got a possum! That's not a possum! - I got a possum! - That's not a possum! Sorry! It's dark out there.
Take a flashlight! Oh! Finally, a possum! -Ew! -I know, right? Melvin has it set to "Basic Smart.
" Let's turn it up to "Talky Smart.
" It's working! I-- I-- I don't understand why humans think it's okay to abduct animals like this.
Wait, is that me? I can speak? What have you done to me? What have you done? Easy, little fella.
We just made you smart.
We should name him.
Possums are pretty testy, so, "Ragely"? J.
Snarlingtooth! Boys, I apologize for my outburst.
I have a bit of a temper.
And this is all very new to me-- names, talking, thinking! I mean, I'm just a possum! I'm scared! And alone! And these walls are closing in! Hey, how would you like to have all the trash you could ever want? All the sweet, beautiful trash I want? How? Tell me now! Every night, a mean guy named Krupp locks up all the trash in the dumpsters outside the mess hall.
Not my arm! We'll get you the key if you scare Krupp so bad, he never comes back.
Then it's Trash City, baby.
Hmm.
Trash City baby.
Chapter 4: The Taming of the Not So Shrewd.
As you might say in your language But you have to give me a free LeisureMyLand! I learned what you're talking for you! - Ahem! - Agh! Hello.
I'm here on behalf of-- George and-- I must ask you to stop screaming.
Because loud noises upset me! Agh! I'm sorry.
My temper got the best of me.
No, it was perfect! You scared him silly.
-I bet he's gone for good! -So, that takes care of Krupp.
-What about the counselors? -I'll handle the Meaners.
Erica? What're you doing here? I've been pretending to be a foreign company all day to mess with Krupp.
What else can you do around here? As for the Meaners, I've got their number.
-Seven? -Twelve? -It's a figure of speech.
-Is the figure 54? -Is the figure 32? -It's a figure of speech.
-Is the figure 28? -Is the figure 39? -It's a figure of speech.
-Six hundred and five? -Is it 92? -It's a figure of speech.
- Seven? - Twelve? I heard working out is actually bad for you.
Well, remember what yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah Dad always used to say? Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah "Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah"? "Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah.
" - I miss him.
- Heads up.
The FBI is coming to check your jump-rope licenses.
-Is that a thing? -I don't know.
But I don't yep-yep-yep-yep-yep got one.
Wow.
Too easy.
All right, everybody, keep chewing.
You, put that over there.
And that goes over there! And you, put that over there.
The adults are gone! And we're tearing down this wall! From now on, we're one camp! United! -And the kids are in charge! -Which means tonight, we party! But first, today we party! "Beware of animals.
Particularly cruel, heartless possums.
" "Animals burp loud.
" Nice.
And, Ragely, as promised, welcome to Trash City, baby.
To the victors belong the spoils.
-Yeah, there'll be spoiled stuff in there.
-All right, it's party time! Now that was a day of summer camp! And this glamping party is the perfect way to end it! "Glamping"? You mean "glamour camping"? -Hate to say it, but this isn't it.
-What do you mean? -Wigs are super glamorous.
-Also super itchy.
Because those aren't wigs.
Those are pieces of insulation.
There he is! Ragely, the titan of trash! The possum that made all of this possible! Here's a half-eaten apple, bro! - What gives, Rage? - We don't want trash! Now that we're smart, animals don't want what you throw away.
We want what you have.
The good stuff.
Food without bite marks.
Outdoor movies.
Pants.
Ah, you want pants? We can make that happen.
-You want my wig too? -Pah! That's a piece of insulation.
Not if you pretend.
Too little, too late! The damage is done! So your luxuries are now our luxuries! And you will be our beasts of burden, baby! Chapter 5: Critter Critter Chicken Dinner.
Here are your rolls and butter, Master Ragely.
Good work, servant.
Now, pamper me.
Ah-hh -Hey, can the kids eat now? -'Cause we're pretty hungry.
Here's the trash key.
To the losers belong the spoils! Aw, man! We gotta eat spoiled stuff? Just as animals once did! And then you will sleep in cages.
And then you will fight for our amusement! And you! Keep dancing, or you'll be our next course! Please don't make me rhumba.
I don't have the hips for it.
We gotta do something! But these animals are watching us like hawks, especially that hawk! Hey, Master Ragely? We need to get more bread and butter.
What? Well, be quick about it, opposable thumbs.
It's time for Captain Underpants.
Yep.
But Krupp is MIA.
How are we gonna find him? Well, I guess this is where we start.
Good thing Krupp is so Krupp-shaped.
-Here, look! -And another one! -But the trail ends here.
-Which means we've got him.
I give up! I pledge allegiance to the possums! Oh, George and Harold.
What are you doing here? Are you working for the possums? - Tra-la-leaves! Hey, are we roughing it? Nice! Let's use these pine cones as toilet paper! First, we gotta deal with some talking animals.
That sounds more fun.
I'll just save this baby for later.
Find me those boys.
And some more bread and butter.
- Or else.
- Guess what? I have bread and butter.
How crazy is that? Too funny.
Anyway, who do I wedgie? -All of them! -But they're so cute.
Don't fall for it.
It's a trick.
How can you doubt those faces? They're adorable-- Chapter 6: The Incredibly Graphic Violence Chapter, presented in Smack-O-Rama.
Because violence is okay if it's part of a carnival game.
I was gonna smack you, but you're too cute to be dangerous.
Agh! Aw-ww! I can't smack you either because you're even cuter.
Ugh! Aw-ww! You'd think I'd learned my lesson, but I haven't.
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! How can a human with so much power be so easily fooled? I mean, we literally tricked him the same way three times.
Ragely's too smart for Captain Underpants! Yeah, Cap's not the sharpest tooth in the shark's mouth.
We need to figure out a way to help Captain Underpants.
Let's roll.
Let's cook this naked dope.
You, socially awkward human inventor.
Invent a restraint from which the mostly naked super-dolt can't escape.
-Can I stop dancing while I work? -No! How do we help Captain Underpants outsmart Ragely? Would a tutor work? Wait a minute.
Uh How do you open this thing? ¡Advancimales! Son animales avanzados Of course! We need to fight smart animals with smarter animals.
You mean, the smartest animals! Thinkcoon! Buffalobe! We've dis-ss-covered the cure for war! Oh, no, it's-ss turning blue! Abandon hover-lab! Yeah, we need to make our own Advancimals! Now we just gotta figure out where to find a raccoon, a snake and a water buffalo.
- Yeah! - And we found the outfits and accessories from the cartoon! What are the odds? Really good, because we're almost out of show.
"Super Talky Smart.
" I don't want to be roasted, but I bet I'd taste great! The laser-ropes are an exceptional invention.
It's a shame you don't dance as well as you invent.
Please, my feet are killing me! Less talk, more tap! It's over, fleshy dope.
I know your friends will try to rescue you.
And then I'll make them side dishes to you, the main course.
You really should marinate us overnight or we'll be hard to chew! Are you cooking you, or am I? Why don't you dance with someone your own size? Yeah-- brain size, that is.
We are the Advanc-ss-imals.
I am Sss-ss Sss-ss Sss Smartaconda.
And no matter what you're thinking, - I've already thought of it.
- Interesting.
It seems we have a real chess match on our hands.
Checkmate.
I win! Or did Smartaconda let you win? To keep you busy while Melvin helped us free Captain Underpants? - Tra-la-look! I'm free! - That's right! I reset the photonmoleculatrix of the laser ropes to re-chronify the omni-- -He cut 'em with scissors.
-That's the dummy version, but, yes.
Because I'm done dancing! Uh-- unless you win and I'll dance some more.
Look Well, I guess there's nothing left to do but fight! Animals, attack! Oh, no! - I'm paralyzed by precious! - Not for long! Good call! Hey! Can you guys bark or squeak so I know where to punch? -No.
-Worth a shot! Tra-la-la! And so it began-- an epic battle of will, of strength, of extreme cuteness.
The battle raged for years for generations for eons! For at least four minutes until it was finally done.
-Who won? -We did! Wait, I hear one more animal! No, no, no, no! That's Mr.
Krupp's car.
Take that, wombat! Huh! Hah! Is it a wombat? All right, I've recalibrated the BeastBooster 2000.
This will make the animals dumb again and restore the natural order.
Wait! No! We gave them the gift of smart.
We can't just take it away.
Of course we can! Being smart made them fight us! No! The way we treated them made them fight us.
George is right.
It's kinda our fault.
What? That's crazy talk! We have to dumb them all down! No-oo! Ugh! - Oh, my! - He'll be fine.
And you animals can stay with us as long as you want.
Nay, we must forge our own path.
We will make our home in the wild.
A utopia for animalkind.
We will succ-ss-eed where humanity has failed.
You guys should make a sandwich shop where the bread is another sandwich! Sandwich Sandwiches! Come, my animal brethren.
Our lives-ss await! Oh, oh! What about pizza with no cheese, sauce or toppings? That's-ss just bread! -We did it.
So good.
-No, we didn't.
As soon as we turn Captain Underpants back into Krupp he'll separate us again.
Boys, you gave me the gift of smart and you let me keep it.
Is there any way I can return the favor? Well, there is one way.
I have an office now-ww! Marketing, we're working through lunch! Order sandwich sandwiches! Why am I wet? Where are my pants? Agh! What do you want?! We wanna be in the same camp.
- Ha! Never! - Either they're together or we're together forever.
Or, push the button.
Welcome home ss-ss Just felt like doing that.