Video Game High School Vghs (2012) s03e02 Episode Script
Nobody Cool Goes To Prom
1 All right, babe, I got to go to school.
Another day, another dollar.
Patricia, love that circle strafing.
work those WASDâs, honey.
Gary, prom's coming up - who's gonna be the lucky lady? Shane! My mortal enemy! Hey, Law, what's up? Oh, not much.
Aah! Whoa, whoa, Law.
Shaneâs a member of the Napalm family.
Thatâs not how we treat family, now, is it? He ruined my life.
Iâll kill him! Okay, everybody! Everybody, come over here and join us for a minute.
Weâre gonna have a quick lesson in workplace hostility.
Ah, look at that.
Now they're going to prom.
See how great this is, everyone? Law Itâs your turn.
Fall into my brother's arms.
It's okay.
Law Iâm sorry I framed you and murdered your robot girlfriend.
Hmm? Pals? Iâll kill you.
You'll die.
You'll die.
Law Itâs all right if you don't want to be a part of this company.
I mean, hey, we took your I.
P.
to greater heights than ever before.
But we'll understand.
There's the door.
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it Do it! Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it, do it.
God forgive me.
You did the right thing, buddy.
Also, we need you to come in on Saturday.
But--but, no.
but prom's on Saturday.
Law.
Nobody cool goes to prom.
"R.
A.
Confidential" The way I see it, there's good kids, and there's bad kids.
and Iâve got the best kids around helping me out.
Sure, we might be down in the polls, but with a bit of hard work and a whole lot of coffee, I know we can win.
Oh, thanks.
Oh! Okay, great job, everybody.
We can call it a night.
Iâll see you all at prom.
Bye, have fun.
Looking forward to tomorrow, bright and early, so Tonight's prom--it's a good excuse to give my team a break.
and to be honest, I could use a break myself.
Somebodyâs stolen Cheeto! But who would want to steal Cheeto? Heâs just a cat.
- Hey Ki, could you fix this hole in my pocket? Not now.
Thereâs been a crime.
When I came back from the bathroom, he was gone.
Cheeto was supposed to judge the dance contest tonight.
Calhoun is gonna be so pissed off.
I can't handle Calhoun when he's mad.
- An actual mystery? here on the frag floor? Where do I start? Round up the suspects? Examine the evidence? Are you smiling? Something smells fishy here, Brian.
Itâs probably his salmon treats.
Brian, you have a loose vent back here.
You should tell maintenance.
You don't want to mess around with mold.
Ki, stolen cat-- Focus! Tell me about Cheeto's enemies.
Enemies? Heâs a cat.
Brian has a point.
Good point.
What about you? Burn any bridges lately? I mean, yeah, but he wouldn't, so Who wouldn't? Aw, crap, that's Calhoun.
I gotta go set up for prom.
Find Cheeto, okay? Brian, wait! What are you hiding? Brainâs not talking, but I know who might.
Brainâs not talking, but I know who might.
Brian and Ted got in another huge fight.
It was really bad, Ki.
Wait.
Ted didn't tell you? Ted didn't tell me.
Why didn't he tell me? Could he have done it? Why isn't he answering? Where is he? Promâs in two hours.
It wasn't ted.
Look at this.
"Beloved Mascot Stolen Under Ki Swan's Nose!" This isn't about Cheeto, no.
This is about you.
Who wants to make you look bad? Who wants to bring you down? Come on in, gang.
I made cocoa.
Why would I steal Cheeto? Iâve got this election in the bag.
Oh, I see.
So that cat hair just walked onto your sleeve by itself.
Youâre chasing shadows, Ki.
That cat sheds all over the school Where were you ten minutes ago? - Reading.
By the fire.
What book? - "Atlas Shrugged" Whoâs it by? Some broad who talks too much.
Sound familiar? So Youâre covered in evidence, you have motive, and your alibi is, you were reading alone.
-Yes.
If by "reading alone" you mean "reading aloud" to my 1.
5 million followers on my "Let's Read" stream.
Be with you guys in just a sec! Are we done here, detective? Nothing makes sense anymore.
Could Ted really steal Brian's cat? Is that the sort of man I love? How does Shane have a fireplace? Should I do my hair like this? Or like this? The only thing I know is Iâm running out of time.
Hello, Games.
Writing the future? Excuse me? Checked the timestamp on your article.
But Brian didn't report Cheeto missing until 6:53.
So I scooped it early.
Big deal.
Don't play games with me, Games.
Your readership's down, print media's dead, you needed a hot story, so you went and stole one.
Whatâs that? Your next headline? "Ace reporter saves missing cat?" Iâve got you.
No! Games! Hey, you can't do this! I got rights! "Dear Moriarty, I think you are really cu" -- what? There, you got me.
I like Moriarty.
I like girls.
You happy now? But Your story-- How did you publish it before it happened? I got a call from an anonymous source, and I ran the story without checking, so sue me! let me see that phone.
Do you recognize this number? Itâs over, Shane.
Oh, for the love of-- Goons! Youâre not getting away with this Iâm going straight to Calhoun.
- Do what you want I didn't take your stupid-- Found the cat! Case closed.
Book him, Wendell.
Wow.
Snaps, Ki.
Really, snaps.
Youâre the hero.
Iâm the bad guy.
Looks like you've got this election all sewn up.
Heâs right.
The school loves Cheeto.
The election's mine for the taking.
Itâs perfect Too perfect.
How could you do it, Wendell? What are you talking about? Shall I walk us through it? You always wanted to go negative against Shane, to find some dirt and use it against him.
You made your move when Brian went to pee But something went wrong.
Cheeto fled into the broken vent.
Now you had two problems: First, convincing me it was Shane, And second - getting Cheeto out out of the vents.
When we searched Shaneâs room, you found your solution.
Brian told us Cheeto loves salmon.
So you sneaked back into his room, stole his salmon treats, dropped them through the hole in your pocket, and voila.
Cat's in the bag.
Damn.
Thatâs pretty crazy, Wendell.
Ki, let me explain, okay? - There's nothing to explain.
You cheated.
But I was just doing what I had to do.
And so am I.
Goons Take him to Calhoun.
No, no.
No, no, no.
Ki, you're better than him.
You love this school! Ki! You care about the students! Thatâs why you'll make a great leader! But it's also why you'll lose, Ki! Youâll lose! Heâs right, you know.
You are gonna lose.
Don't you have a prom to go to, Shane? Ki, nobody cool goes to prom.
Some kids are good.
Some kids are bad.
Thatâs how I used to see it, anyway.
But how do you make sense of a kid like Wendell Brixby and a case like this? He was just trying to do the right thing.
Just trying to help me out.
They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
What road am I on? "Swan Fires Running Mate!" "The Unicorn Hunter" But it's your first prom.
We have to go.
- No.
No, no.
Jenny - listen.
Youâre really, really sick.
Thereâs gonna be other proms, alright? You don't know that.
Carpe diem, let's do it.
No, listen, you stay here.
Get some rest.
Iâm gonna be by later-- Wait-- wait a minute.
Is that? a unicorn? - What? No, no, don't look at that.
Oh, my gosh.
Thereâs, like, a whole magical world in here! Did you draw these? It's just stuff I used to draw as a kid.
This ink looks pretty fresh.
And sometimes now.
Put it away, or Iâll kill you.
Okay, don't worry.
I won't tell anyone you have an imagination.
Iâm sorry I can't go to the prom with you.
Itâs not your fault Princess Moonbeam Oh, Summ'rwynd, 'tis ever so grand to ride with you once more across the plains of Eveningmorn.
It has been too many moons since you last graced these lands with your visage, princess.
Come, princess.
Your kingdom awaits you.
Ride me, for I am Summ'rwynd, and your kingdom has-- Congrats, Jenny bear.
You can join my team.
Really? I can be a Panther, in Paris, In the pros? Anything for my little girl.
All you have to do is kill the unicorn.
Thatâs not too much to ask for everything you've ever wanted.
But We're best friends forever.
Center mass.
Squeeze -- don't pull.
I can make that shot.
Can you? I love you.
Yes! I did it! Iâm so happy! "Barcycle Thieves" Radical solo, Harry.
I love jamming with you, Sam.
Team Ham! Uh, one second.
Let's get outta here.
Oh, hey, it's that guy.
Uh, where's Jenny? Oh, well, she's, like, crazy sick, so Youâre going to prom by yourself? Whereâs Ted? - Oh you didn't hear? They broke up.
Iâm so sorry.
Do you want to talk about it? No.
Guys, Iâm fine.
Look, it's gonna be awesome in there, okay Theyâve got free punch Dance contest, right? Itâs--yeah.
So Itâs gonna be awesome.
Wait.
are you guys leaving? Yeah, nobody cool goes to prom, Brian.
Besides, my cousin Sames is throwing a totally swiss frat party at VGU.
Enjoy the free punch, though.
Okay, bye, Brian.
Have fun by yourself! Just you? Hey, guys, wait up.
Got room to sneak one more in? Heâs really weird.
Heâs just lonely.
Heâs lonely 'cause he's weird.
Okay, we all just decided you could hear everything we just said and we're sorry about that.
So You want to come to the party? Here we go! Yeah this is it! So then what happens is, if you lose, you have to drink all of it anyways.
So even when you lose, you win! Oh, we're here.
We're here.
This is it.
There's gonna be booze here, right? - Uh It's a college party, so Probably.
Iâm ready to party, yeah.
That guy's got a drink.
What do you got there? 'Sup, Sames? Whatâs buzzin', cousin? What the f are you doing here, choad? Uh, you told me you were having a party Yeah, I was bragging, not inviting.
Now scram.
Oh, your bikes are getting stolen.
Bro--what? We doing it? What? Sames! You guys! Ugh! Whoa! give us back our bikes, You fart-knockers! What she said! Yeah, this sucks! Iâm sorry, guys.
Sames always was a turd-ball.
Letâs just go home.
Oh, man.
We never have any fun.
Come on, guys.
We can do Stuff.
Like what? Stuff.
I Look, we-- we got the night off, okay? Weâre out here.
We are cool customers.
We can definitely figure out stuff to do.
Letâs just get out there and do it! You guys I don't know a lot, but I know Brianâs right, right now.
Forget those bikes.
Letâs do stuff! All right, here we go! Man, Iâm glad we did all this stuff.
Tonight, together.
Youâre a cool guy, Brian.
Good idea.
- Thanks, man.
Wait.
What was that? What? Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
- Dude, what is it? Itâs a barcycle! What? Itâs a barcycle, guys.
This thing's the real deal.
Itâs a bar on wheels.
How did it get here? How do rainbows form, Brian? I don't know.
Itâs beautiful.
But do you think that-- Okay, okay, okay.
Truth? What base are you and Jenny on? Uh, dare, dare.
Drink! - Drink! Okay, um Third? Oh, nice.
Oh, that's lame.
Ugh, no.
Uh , second? Sexually appropriate.
Dude, Jenny is old news.
We got to know what base you and Ted are on.
What happened with you guys? I heard you, like, punched him in the face.
- I heard that--that he-- you killed him! and now you're not friends.
Guys, I really don't want to talk about it.
Did Ted break your heart, Brian? Is that why you punched his face? Share your pain.
Tell us.
Yeah, tell us.
Tell us, tell us.
Come on, tell us.
Tell us, tell us, Okay.
How about we watch me drink? Yeah! And then, uh Ted fell.
And it was bad.
Like, not just bad, but, like no-more-friends bad.
I suck.
What? You don't suck.
You led us to this.
Youâre like Youâre like the Moses of beer.
Yeah, man.
We are your Teds now.
Four Teds and one Jenny.
Itâs pretty.
It's beautiful.
Four Teds.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God! I should have been hanging out with you guys the whole time.
I love you guys.
I wish tonight would never end I wish it would go on forever.
Me too.
Ugh, crap.
We have to walk back to school.
Walk back? Why would we walk back? Where are you going? Why walk back When you can party back? Oh, yeah! Best night ever! Slow down! Slow down, guys! Hey Sames, this is my butt! Hey, Games, those are police officers.
Oh, God! Youâre headed right for them! No! You kids need to come with us.
Randall Merriweather, your dad's here.
Trisha Ashby, let's go.
Allison Michaels.
Games Dean.
Kid, you got anyone to call? So you are literally my personal assistant now until I die.
Or you do.
Understood? Hey, Calhoun What? How do rainbows form? God, I hate my job.
No, but really.
So beautiful.
I don't know how they get them so colorful.
Itâs like a dream, but it's real.
"Full Throttle" Oh, hey, guys.
Leaving so soon? The dance doesn't start for another two hours.
Come! stay! Make merry with us! Dang, I wish I could, but I got to go move my dad's car before prom.
Ted, you have a car? Oh, no, my dad has a car.
I just move it on Fridays before street cleaning.
Theodore, we're going to an erotic arcade.
Wait.
What? No way! That's gross.
"No way"? That sounds like something your gross friend Brian would say.
Brian? I hate that guy.
Letâs go! - Let's do it! Oh, crap, guys, keep it down.
And buckle your seat belts.
Clutch, what the hell? That was my phone! No cell phones while driving, Ted! It can wait.
Okay, guys, prom starts at 9:00, so get back by 8:30, okay? What, you're not coming? We got you this fake I.
D.
Nobody cool goes to prom, Ted.
Theodore, this place, This Elysium, has sights to behold! Nude Raider, Nudes of War Naked Halo.
None for me, thanks.
I have a girlfriend.
Whoa.
Youâve seen Ki naked? We are not talking about this right now.
Iâll see you in 30 minutes.
"Rich Dad, Poor Dad" Man I can't wait to be a dad.
Oh, crap! Salutations, sir.
This 21-year-old would like to enter your premises, please.
Freddie Wong? It says here you owe us a lot of money.
What? Wow.
Got to go.
Bye.
Come here.
Where are you going? - Nowhere.
Oh God.
Ready to die, Freddie Wong? Youâre not Freddie Wong.
Who are you? Not his son-- that's for sure.
Iâm just a stupid kid with a fake I.
D.
You got ten seconds to tell me what you're doing here.
Uh, I I I want to see all the breasts.
I like this guy! He checks out.
You got yourself a job.
Cool.
Three tokens for you.
Damn! Hey, token boy! Give me a token! Coming.
Whereâs my mojito? Oh, sorry.
Itâs a little minty, but not bad, kid.
Thanks, Toe Jam.
You just cost me my continue.
Looks like we're both out of lives.
Hey, guys.
We got a problem.
We let these kids in with their fake I.
Dâs, and they repay us by stealing my favorite game? Ted! You always wanted to be a member of the Rumble Pack, right? - Uh Go teach these kids a lesson.
Yeah.
Totally, huh? Gonna use this Real gun and go shoot and kill 'em a whole bunch of times.
Yeah, straight murder.
You know, I see myself in that kid.
Got to go, got to go! D.
K.
, we are leaving! Now! Ah, just in time.
Lend a hand! We are not stealing this thing! Theodore, I hold the high score on this machine.
It is mine by kingly right! For you see, every gamer who-- No, no! No more speeches.
No more king stuff.
We got to go right now, Otherwise we are-- - Hey Ted.
Canât help but notice you're stealing my game.
To be honest Youâre gonna die.
Toe Jam! Earl This has all been a big misunderstanding.
My boys, and girl , have mad disrespected you, and we're just gonna go ahead and put that cabinet right back.
No we're not! Run Ted! Kill Ted first! Ted, hurry up! We got to go! Yeah, he did it! Go, go, go! - Punch it! Oh my God! Ted, are you okay? Iâm okay.
Iâm okay! Yes! We did it! Go faster! This is how you live, Ted! This is how you live! D.
K.
, watch out! The perfect drift A good death What the hell is going on? My car! What did you Ted? I moved your car.
Hey! Hey, what are you doing? You get back here! Hey! Hey! You take one more step, you got detention! You look at me! You have three weeks! You have three weeks of detention starting right now, you hear me?
Another day, another dollar.
Patricia, love that circle strafing.
work those WASDâs, honey.
Gary, prom's coming up - who's gonna be the lucky lady? Shane! My mortal enemy! Hey, Law, what's up? Oh, not much.
Aah! Whoa, whoa, Law.
Shaneâs a member of the Napalm family.
Thatâs not how we treat family, now, is it? He ruined my life.
Iâll kill him! Okay, everybody! Everybody, come over here and join us for a minute.
Weâre gonna have a quick lesson in workplace hostility.
Ah, look at that.
Now they're going to prom.
See how great this is, everyone? Law Itâs your turn.
Fall into my brother's arms.
It's okay.
Law Iâm sorry I framed you and murdered your robot girlfriend.
Hmm? Pals? Iâll kill you.
You'll die.
You'll die.
Law Itâs all right if you don't want to be a part of this company.
I mean, hey, we took your I.
P.
to greater heights than ever before.
But we'll understand.
There's the door.
Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it Do it! Do it, do it, do it, Do it, do it, do it.
God forgive me.
You did the right thing, buddy.
Also, we need you to come in on Saturday.
But--but, no.
but prom's on Saturday.
Law.
Nobody cool goes to prom.
"R.
A.
Confidential" The way I see it, there's good kids, and there's bad kids.
and Iâve got the best kids around helping me out.
Sure, we might be down in the polls, but with a bit of hard work and a whole lot of coffee, I know we can win.
Oh, thanks.
Oh! Okay, great job, everybody.
We can call it a night.
Iâll see you all at prom.
Bye, have fun.
Looking forward to tomorrow, bright and early, so Tonight's prom--it's a good excuse to give my team a break.
and to be honest, I could use a break myself.
Somebodyâs stolen Cheeto! But who would want to steal Cheeto? Heâs just a cat.
- Hey Ki, could you fix this hole in my pocket? Not now.
Thereâs been a crime.
When I came back from the bathroom, he was gone.
Cheeto was supposed to judge the dance contest tonight.
Calhoun is gonna be so pissed off.
I can't handle Calhoun when he's mad.
- An actual mystery? here on the frag floor? Where do I start? Round up the suspects? Examine the evidence? Are you smiling? Something smells fishy here, Brian.
Itâs probably his salmon treats.
Brian, you have a loose vent back here.
You should tell maintenance.
You don't want to mess around with mold.
Ki, stolen cat-- Focus! Tell me about Cheeto's enemies.
Enemies? Heâs a cat.
Brian has a point.
Good point.
What about you? Burn any bridges lately? I mean, yeah, but he wouldn't, so Who wouldn't? Aw, crap, that's Calhoun.
I gotta go set up for prom.
Find Cheeto, okay? Brian, wait! What are you hiding? Brainâs not talking, but I know who might.
Brainâs not talking, but I know who might.
Brian and Ted got in another huge fight.
It was really bad, Ki.
Wait.
Ted didn't tell you? Ted didn't tell me.
Why didn't he tell me? Could he have done it? Why isn't he answering? Where is he? Promâs in two hours.
It wasn't ted.
Look at this.
"Beloved Mascot Stolen Under Ki Swan's Nose!" This isn't about Cheeto, no.
This is about you.
Who wants to make you look bad? Who wants to bring you down? Come on in, gang.
I made cocoa.
Why would I steal Cheeto? Iâve got this election in the bag.
Oh, I see.
So that cat hair just walked onto your sleeve by itself.
Youâre chasing shadows, Ki.
That cat sheds all over the school Where were you ten minutes ago? - Reading.
By the fire.
What book? - "Atlas Shrugged" Whoâs it by? Some broad who talks too much.
Sound familiar? So Youâre covered in evidence, you have motive, and your alibi is, you were reading alone.
-Yes.
If by "reading alone" you mean "reading aloud" to my 1.
5 million followers on my "Let's Read" stream.
Be with you guys in just a sec! Are we done here, detective? Nothing makes sense anymore.
Could Ted really steal Brian's cat? Is that the sort of man I love? How does Shane have a fireplace? Should I do my hair like this? Or like this? The only thing I know is Iâm running out of time.
Hello, Games.
Writing the future? Excuse me? Checked the timestamp on your article.
But Brian didn't report Cheeto missing until 6:53.
So I scooped it early.
Big deal.
Don't play games with me, Games.
Your readership's down, print media's dead, you needed a hot story, so you went and stole one.
Whatâs that? Your next headline? "Ace reporter saves missing cat?" Iâve got you.
No! Games! Hey, you can't do this! I got rights! "Dear Moriarty, I think you are really cu" -- what? There, you got me.
I like Moriarty.
I like girls.
You happy now? But Your story-- How did you publish it before it happened? I got a call from an anonymous source, and I ran the story without checking, so sue me! let me see that phone.
Do you recognize this number? Itâs over, Shane.
Oh, for the love of-- Goons! Youâre not getting away with this Iâm going straight to Calhoun.
- Do what you want I didn't take your stupid-- Found the cat! Case closed.
Book him, Wendell.
Wow.
Snaps, Ki.
Really, snaps.
Youâre the hero.
Iâm the bad guy.
Looks like you've got this election all sewn up.
Heâs right.
The school loves Cheeto.
The election's mine for the taking.
Itâs perfect Too perfect.
How could you do it, Wendell? What are you talking about? Shall I walk us through it? You always wanted to go negative against Shane, to find some dirt and use it against him.
You made your move when Brian went to pee But something went wrong.
Cheeto fled into the broken vent.
Now you had two problems: First, convincing me it was Shane, And second - getting Cheeto out out of the vents.
When we searched Shaneâs room, you found your solution.
Brian told us Cheeto loves salmon.
So you sneaked back into his room, stole his salmon treats, dropped them through the hole in your pocket, and voila.
Cat's in the bag.
Damn.
Thatâs pretty crazy, Wendell.
Ki, let me explain, okay? - There's nothing to explain.
You cheated.
But I was just doing what I had to do.
And so am I.
Goons Take him to Calhoun.
No, no.
No, no, no.
Ki, you're better than him.
You love this school! Ki! You care about the students! Thatâs why you'll make a great leader! But it's also why you'll lose, Ki! Youâll lose! Heâs right, you know.
You are gonna lose.
Don't you have a prom to go to, Shane? Ki, nobody cool goes to prom.
Some kids are good.
Some kids are bad.
Thatâs how I used to see it, anyway.
But how do you make sense of a kid like Wendell Brixby and a case like this? He was just trying to do the right thing.
Just trying to help me out.
They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
What road am I on? "Swan Fires Running Mate!" "The Unicorn Hunter" But it's your first prom.
We have to go.
- No.
No, no.
Jenny - listen.
Youâre really, really sick.
Thereâs gonna be other proms, alright? You don't know that.
Carpe diem, let's do it.
No, listen, you stay here.
Get some rest.
Iâm gonna be by later-- Wait-- wait a minute.
Is that? a unicorn? - What? No, no, don't look at that.
Oh, my gosh.
Thereâs, like, a whole magical world in here! Did you draw these? It's just stuff I used to draw as a kid.
This ink looks pretty fresh.
And sometimes now.
Put it away, or Iâll kill you.
Okay, don't worry.
I won't tell anyone you have an imagination.
Iâm sorry I can't go to the prom with you.
Itâs not your fault Princess Moonbeam Oh, Summ'rwynd, 'tis ever so grand to ride with you once more across the plains of Eveningmorn.
It has been too many moons since you last graced these lands with your visage, princess.
Come, princess.
Your kingdom awaits you.
Ride me, for I am Summ'rwynd, and your kingdom has-- Congrats, Jenny bear.
You can join my team.
Really? I can be a Panther, in Paris, In the pros? Anything for my little girl.
All you have to do is kill the unicorn.
Thatâs not too much to ask for everything you've ever wanted.
But We're best friends forever.
Center mass.
Squeeze -- don't pull.
I can make that shot.
Can you? I love you.
Yes! I did it! Iâm so happy! "Barcycle Thieves" Radical solo, Harry.
I love jamming with you, Sam.
Team Ham! Uh, one second.
Let's get outta here.
Oh, hey, it's that guy.
Uh, where's Jenny? Oh, well, she's, like, crazy sick, so Youâre going to prom by yourself? Whereâs Ted? - Oh you didn't hear? They broke up.
Iâm so sorry.
Do you want to talk about it? No.
Guys, Iâm fine.
Look, it's gonna be awesome in there, okay Theyâve got free punch Dance contest, right? Itâs--yeah.
So Itâs gonna be awesome.
Wait.
are you guys leaving? Yeah, nobody cool goes to prom, Brian.
Besides, my cousin Sames is throwing a totally swiss frat party at VGU.
Enjoy the free punch, though.
Okay, bye, Brian.
Have fun by yourself! Just you? Hey, guys, wait up.
Got room to sneak one more in? Heâs really weird.
Heâs just lonely.
Heâs lonely 'cause he's weird.
Okay, we all just decided you could hear everything we just said and we're sorry about that.
So You want to come to the party? Here we go! Yeah this is it! So then what happens is, if you lose, you have to drink all of it anyways.
So even when you lose, you win! Oh, we're here.
We're here.
This is it.
There's gonna be booze here, right? - Uh It's a college party, so Probably.
Iâm ready to party, yeah.
That guy's got a drink.
What do you got there? 'Sup, Sames? Whatâs buzzin', cousin? What the f are you doing here, choad? Uh, you told me you were having a party Yeah, I was bragging, not inviting.
Now scram.
Oh, your bikes are getting stolen.
Bro--what? We doing it? What? Sames! You guys! Ugh! Whoa! give us back our bikes, You fart-knockers! What she said! Yeah, this sucks! Iâm sorry, guys.
Sames always was a turd-ball.
Letâs just go home.
Oh, man.
We never have any fun.
Come on, guys.
We can do Stuff.
Like what? Stuff.
I Look, we-- we got the night off, okay? Weâre out here.
We are cool customers.
We can definitely figure out stuff to do.
Letâs just get out there and do it! You guys I don't know a lot, but I know Brianâs right, right now.
Forget those bikes.
Letâs do stuff! All right, here we go! Man, Iâm glad we did all this stuff.
Tonight, together.
Youâre a cool guy, Brian.
Good idea.
- Thanks, man.
Wait.
What was that? What? Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
- Dude, what is it? Itâs a barcycle! What? Itâs a barcycle, guys.
This thing's the real deal.
Itâs a bar on wheels.
How did it get here? How do rainbows form, Brian? I don't know.
Itâs beautiful.
But do you think that-- Okay, okay, okay.
Truth? What base are you and Jenny on? Uh, dare, dare.
Drink! - Drink! Okay, um Third? Oh, nice.
Oh, that's lame.
Ugh, no.
Uh , second? Sexually appropriate.
Dude, Jenny is old news.
We got to know what base you and Ted are on.
What happened with you guys? I heard you, like, punched him in the face.
- I heard that--that he-- you killed him! and now you're not friends.
Guys, I really don't want to talk about it.
Did Ted break your heart, Brian? Is that why you punched his face? Share your pain.
Tell us.
Yeah, tell us.
Tell us, tell us.
Come on, tell us.
Tell us, tell us, Okay.
How about we watch me drink? Yeah! And then, uh Ted fell.
And it was bad.
Like, not just bad, but, like no-more-friends bad.
I suck.
What? You don't suck.
You led us to this.
Youâre like Youâre like the Moses of beer.
Yeah, man.
We are your Teds now.
Four Teds and one Jenny.
Itâs pretty.
It's beautiful.
Four Teds.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God! I should have been hanging out with you guys the whole time.
I love you guys.
I wish tonight would never end I wish it would go on forever.
Me too.
Ugh, crap.
We have to walk back to school.
Walk back? Why would we walk back? Where are you going? Why walk back When you can party back? Oh, yeah! Best night ever! Slow down! Slow down, guys! Hey Sames, this is my butt! Hey, Games, those are police officers.
Oh, God! Youâre headed right for them! No! You kids need to come with us.
Randall Merriweather, your dad's here.
Trisha Ashby, let's go.
Allison Michaels.
Games Dean.
Kid, you got anyone to call? So you are literally my personal assistant now until I die.
Or you do.
Understood? Hey, Calhoun What? How do rainbows form? God, I hate my job.
No, but really.
So beautiful.
I don't know how they get them so colorful.
Itâs like a dream, but it's real.
"Full Throttle" Oh, hey, guys.
Leaving so soon? The dance doesn't start for another two hours.
Come! stay! Make merry with us! Dang, I wish I could, but I got to go move my dad's car before prom.
Ted, you have a car? Oh, no, my dad has a car.
I just move it on Fridays before street cleaning.
Theodore, we're going to an erotic arcade.
Wait.
What? No way! That's gross.
"No way"? That sounds like something your gross friend Brian would say.
Brian? I hate that guy.
Letâs go! - Let's do it! Oh, crap, guys, keep it down.
And buckle your seat belts.
Clutch, what the hell? That was my phone! No cell phones while driving, Ted! It can wait.
Okay, guys, prom starts at 9:00, so get back by 8:30, okay? What, you're not coming? We got you this fake I.
D.
Nobody cool goes to prom, Ted.
Theodore, this place, This Elysium, has sights to behold! Nude Raider, Nudes of War Naked Halo.
None for me, thanks.
I have a girlfriend.
Whoa.
Youâve seen Ki naked? We are not talking about this right now.
Iâll see you in 30 minutes.
"Rich Dad, Poor Dad" Man I can't wait to be a dad.
Oh, crap! Salutations, sir.
This 21-year-old would like to enter your premises, please.
Freddie Wong? It says here you owe us a lot of money.
What? Wow.
Got to go.
Bye.
Come here.
Where are you going? - Nowhere.
Oh God.
Ready to die, Freddie Wong? Youâre not Freddie Wong.
Who are you? Not his son-- that's for sure.
Iâm just a stupid kid with a fake I.
D.
You got ten seconds to tell me what you're doing here.
Uh, I I I want to see all the breasts.
I like this guy! He checks out.
You got yourself a job.
Cool.
Three tokens for you.
Damn! Hey, token boy! Give me a token! Coming.
Whereâs my mojito? Oh, sorry.
Itâs a little minty, but not bad, kid.
Thanks, Toe Jam.
You just cost me my continue.
Looks like we're both out of lives.
Hey, guys.
We got a problem.
We let these kids in with their fake I.
Dâs, and they repay us by stealing my favorite game? Ted! You always wanted to be a member of the Rumble Pack, right? - Uh Go teach these kids a lesson.
Yeah.
Totally, huh? Gonna use this Real gun and go shoot and kill 'em a whole bunch of times.
Yeah, straight murder.
You know, I see myself in that kid.
Got to go, got to go! D.
K.
, we are leaving! Now! Ah, just in time.
Lend a hand! We are not stealing this thing! Theodore, I hold the high score on this machine.
It is mine by kingly right! For you see, every gamer who-- No, no! No more speeches.
No more king stuff.
We got to go right now, Otherwise we are-- - Hey Ted.
Canât help but notice you're stealing my game.
To be honest Youâre gonna die.
Toe Jam! Earl This has all been a big misunderstanding.
My boys, and girl , have mad disrespected you, and we're just gonna go ahead and put that cabinet right back.
No we're not! Run Ted! Kill Ted first! Ted, hurry up! We got to go! Yeah, he did it! Go, go, go! - Punch it! Oh my God! Ted, are you okay? Iâm okay.
Iâm okay! Yes! We did it! Go faster! This is how you live, Ted! This is how you live! D.
K.
, watch out! The perfect drift A good death What the hell is going on? My car! What did you Ted? I moved your car.
Hey! Hey, what are you doing? You get back here! Hey! Hey! You take one more step, you got detention! You look at me! You have three weeks! You have three weeks of detention starting right now, you hear me?