Weird Science s03e02 Episode Script
Horseradish
We were born 20 years too late.
If this were 1975 we'd be totally raging right now.
Yeah, yeah, it would be a party.
We'd all be listening to Captain & Tennille while free-spirited women with underarm hair - caress our bell bottoms.
- You make it sound like a bad thing.
Well, now, what do we have here? Looks like big brother Chett's been doing a little stealth-hacking unless you're downloading pictures of Semiautomatic Sandy.
Hello, ladies.
You're home early from the beauty parlor.
You've been busted, bro.
Okay, I admit it.
I've been using your computer.
And I'm glad you caught me because seeing the two of you standing there looking at me like I was some common criminal has reminded me of something very important.
I can still kick both your bony butts to the moon.
- But - It seems unfair but you're both going to feel a little bit better once you've fixed me a sandwich and brought me a beer.
Chop chop.
What just happened? I thought we had the upper hand.
Oh, how do you delete this Lisa file? It's taking up all the space on the hard drive.
It doesn't even do anything.
Look.
"Lisa.
" See? Nothing.
You left the file unprotected.
I know.
It was stupid.
- Anyone could have accessed me.
- WYATT: There were some safeguards.
Like what? You had to be able to spell "Lisa"? Chett surprise me, that's all.
Make it so we're the only two people who can call you up.
Come on, I've got an idea.
I suggest a pass-key system.
Choose a password and I'll take care of the security precautions.
That's okay.
You had your shot.
I'll choose the password this time.
I can handle it.
No, you're too predictable.
- Like someone will guess - "Telephone"? - Okay.
How about - "Desk lamp"? Then "carpet.
" Then "Lisa.
" Spelled backwards.
Okay.
I got one.
Good.
Let's try it out.
Now for the sealer.
( both yelling ) Lis, you got to give us some warning before you do that.
- I'm blind.
- There.
It's secure.
No files can be accessed.
No data can be read.
I can't even get into it.
Now try the password.
Let's open it up.
Gary, enter the password.
It's, uh uh - This is classic.
- You forgot the password? Sorry! It must have slipped my mind when you detonated that little hydrogen bomb a minute ago.
- I'll make up a new one.
- Let me help you understand this.
There is only one password and until you remember it my powers are in there, and I'm trapped out here.
- No magic? - No.
It's made of Titanic Beryllium.
Nothing can penetrate it.
I'm completely locked out.
No magic, no zapping, nothing.
We should have stayed with "telephone.
" WAYNE: Wyatt, are you in there? Dad! WAYNE: Wyatt, open up.
What are we going to do? He's going to see Lisa.
Be cool.
I knew something like this would happen someday.
I'm ready.
CHETT: Dad said now.
He means now! Don't make me get my fire axe and come Door's open.
I heard a noise.
And I smell something electrical.
Oh, my goodness.
I don't know you.
I don't either but I'd sure like to.
I'm Wayne Donnelly.
And you are? - I'm - Valadja Slavko.
She escaped in the middle of her trapeze act from a touring Bulgarian Circus.
Yeah, Dad, and I'm little Richard.
The father of rock and roll.
Is true.
Circus treats me very bad.
Must share tent with bearded lady and elephant boy.
- Gary and Wyatt rescue Slavia - Nadia.
- Valadja.
- from certain death.
And now they got the clowns and the dancing poodles looking for her.
I know it sounds crazy, but look, here's all her documentation.
Well, it certainly looks official.
Birth certificate, passport letter of commendation - from Siegfried and Roy.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're not seriously buying this, are you? This is obviously a scam job.
Please, kind sir don't send Valadja back to evil ringmaster.
Well, I suppose Wyatt's quiet respect and strong moral code have earned my trust.
And I'm sure by this time tomorrow he'll put this entire episode behind us.
- Isn't that right, Wyatt? - Absolutely.
Valadja can stay until then, right? She can stay in the guest house by herself for one day.
I'm going to figure this out.
Have a party.
"Clowns and dancing poodles"? - Any luck with that password? - I'm working on it.
Well, work faster.
I hate being trapped in this lame, little world.
You know what I mean.
What are we doing now? - Going to bed-- it's late.
- But I've never slept before.
I don't even know how.
You just take off all your clothes slip into the bed and press up against me as hard as you can.
- You'll be out in no time.
- Gary, don't you have to go? Oh, sure and leave you alone and teach Lisa how to do all the things she's never done before? What am I going to do? Wait for you to leave and teach her how to drive? Lisa, have you ever taken a shower? No.
- I know how you work.
- You're paranoid.
- GARY: Wyatt? - What? Is she asleep? I think so.
What time is it? she'd stop jabbering.
She was nervous.
It's probably the first time she's ever been unconscious.
( muttering ) I think she's dreaming.
You heartless bastard! WYATT: Lisa, what are you doing? Don't play dumb.
You were there watching him.
Thought you could juggle those poor, innocent puppies.
Where am I? Where's the blue giant? - And the snake with the pants? - You were dreaming.
It wasn't real.
Let go.
- But he was and you were - All in your head.
It happens when you go to sleep.
I'm sleeping on the floor.
Good.
That's where you deserve to sleep you stinking weasel.
It wasn't real.
Poor little puppies.
You remember that password yet buddy o' mine? She should be here somewhere.
She said she'd meet us after school, right? I am kind of thirsty, come to think of it.
Well, it looks like you got the human thing pretty much down.
Yeah, it's okay.
I miss my magic though.
You know I had to walk here? It took 15 minutes.
Tell me about it.
I haven't walked this much in months.
- Or paid for stuff.
- Or picked my nose.
Have I told you about that? I don't know what's so great about being human.
It's pretty boring, not to mention painful.
- What's so painful? - I feel like I have this water balloon in my stomach that's about to burst, and it just keeps getting worse.
Lisa, have you ever gone to the bathroom before? That's what that is.
How do you make it through a long movie? I'm sorry to interrupt, but I was watching you.
I know this is kind of forward but I think you're very beautiful.
Take a hike.
She's spoken for.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You guys are so much younger, I figured When you figure you make a fig out of "u" and "re.
" What does that mean? It means she's busy.
Why did you do that? He was kind of cute.
- He was going to ask me out.
- Oh, so you're dating now? Well, excuse me for trying to make the best of being human.
Excuse me for trying to learn about relationships and emotions.
Excuse me-- I have to go to the bathroom.
The toilet's the one without the faucets.
What? She has a right to date if she wants to.
I suppose.
But we set the rules.
No kissing, no touching, no nuzzling.
No romantic walks, comfortable silences or childhood stories.
No talking about sexy scenes in movies MTV videos or the diet coke guy.
No beer, no wine, no oysters.
Do we make ourselves perfectly clear? Yeah I guess.
Oh, hi.
Lisa, Steve you're on your own.
Be home by 11:00 or you're grounded.
Your parents are strict.
They're just very concerned friends.
I can see why.
Have you had dinner? I'd love to.
Your turn.
There, that's the last one.
- Now what? - What time is it? She's a little late.
Probably ditched him and went to a movie.
Exactly! - Want to play another game? - Good idea.
Scrabble, Risk, Monopoly, Candyland - Candyland! - You want to play Candyland? - I love Candyland.
- Candyland's for two-year-olds.
I remember the computer password.
It's horseradish.
Oh, that's great.
How do you get "horseradish" from "Candyland"? Duh.
Oh, I had a great time tonight, Lisa.
Me too.
I'm sorry I had to keep getting up.
That movie was pretty long.
This may sound like I'm moving kind of fast but we should have kids, move into a big house and spend the rest of our lives together.
- Or at least a second date.
- Oh, decisions, decisions.
Can I have a second date and the house? How about a cond date and a kiss? You're home.
About time too.
- Hi, guys.
- You have fun tonight? I know I did.
Hey, Lis, we got great news-- Gary remembered the password.
You can get back in the computer and get your magic powers.
Lis? I'm not going back.
I've decided I really want to be a human being.
So I'm going to try it for real.
No more computer genie stuff.
Isn't that great? BOTH: Great.
- Lisa, we got to talk.
- Yes, we do.
And Lisa wants to hear everything you have to say but first you have to help me find an apartment.
What does "FP WD LL" stand for? Fireplace, washer/dryer, lava lamp.
Oh, that sounds nice.
Lisa You have to go back into the computer.
( makes buzzer sound ) Sorry.
Wrong answer.
How are you going to survive on your own? You can't zap up food.
And how are you going to pay your rent? Wow.
You're right.
What was I thinking? I need a job first.
Jobs.
Jobs "pastry chef.
" Lisa, you don't know anything about living alone.
I won't be alone.
Steve's my boyfriend now.
Now I'm completely relieved.
Lis, you can't just jump in the real world like this.
You're not ready.
It's too big a step.
I'm doing it.
Then we're coming with you.
That's it.
We'll all move in together.
It'll be great.
We can hang out live by our own rules, carpool.
That sounds great, Gary, but I have to do this on my own.
I finally had a taste of what's it like to be human and I like it.
I like getting dressed and buying things.
And I like being in love and I like doing things for myself without the magic.
I need to do this.
- Will we still be able to see you? - Of course.
Hey, come over to Steve's place tomorrow night.
I'll make dinner.
it'll just be you two, me and Steve.
Don't worry.
I'll make a great human.
I've had great teachers.
Uh-oh.
Okay, it may not be exactly right but it's the first time I've ever tried anything without, you know help.
- What is it? - I kind of improvised.
See if you can tell.
- I'm getting fish? - Licorice.
Some kind of paint.
It's chicken.
- It's great - You're great.
Honey, would you mind getting me a beer? Cooking's one of those things you either do and do it well or she could care less.
- You guys cook? - Not professionally.
I probably shouldn't be telling you this but Lila, my ex, now, she was a great cook.
There would be something different every night-- pot roast, homemade pasta, lamb I saw a pasta dish I wanted to try.
Honey, I'm not finished.
Fish, beef, salads beef.
Oh, she could cook.
Did I tell you I have an interview? That was the great thing about Lila.
She didn't work so she had plenty of time for us for the relationship.
But, hey, yeah, everybody's different.
Lis, can I help you with the dishes? She's pretty hot, isn't she? So, what do you think of him? He's a pig.
You should dump him and come home with us.
I can't.
He's not perfect but every relationship takes work.
I just need to try harder.
I am getting better at being human, aren't I? Yeah.
You're getting better.
- You wash, I'll dry? - Huh? Anyone up for dessert? You don't think men and women belong together? I'm saying no couple can stay together forever - because animal instinct takes over.
- Animal instinct? Explain this to me.
Steve, maybe we should talk about something else.
It's like we're in this big human jungle and we got to keep moving meeting other animals, mating, hunting Killing the weak and eating their flesh.
No.
- You don't get it.
- I get it.
You don't want to date one woman.
- Steve, maybe we - Lila, please.
I mean, uh Lisa.
Yikes.
Deja vu.
Why are you doing this? If they keep fighting, they'll break up.
Who are we to decide who Lisa loves or doesn't? Do you want her wasting the rest of her life with this jerk? Getting her heart broken? Sleeping with him? You know, Steve, Lisa put this whole dinner together.
The least you could do is thank her for it.
She knows I appreciate it.
Who's "she"? Lisa or Lila? He's right, Steve.
You could have said something.
And my name is not Lila.
It's Lisa.
I know.
I don't want you to be Lila.
He just wants you to cook like her.
- Stay at home like her.
- That's not true.
I'm here with you.
Yeah, but for how long? Like you say, you got to keep moving and hunting.
Mating.
If it's so impossible for you to be with just one woman maybe I should leave.
Maybe you should, you freaky chick.
- Fine.
- Fine! - Fine! - Fine! Lila looked better in that dress than you do.
Lisa, wait.
So close.
Look, I'm sorry.
A little too late for that, buddy.
Yeah, she's not talking to you.
We are out of here.
I just get so afraid of losing you.
You're so beautiful and so smart.
I want to make it work.
Then move in with me.
If you're serious, I'll move in tonight.
I am very serious.
I've never been more serious with anyone.
I want to be with you forever.
( knocking ) Hello? Lila? What are you doing here? Steve, I had to see you again.
- Who's this? - Nobody.
Nothing.
What? I came to give you another chance but if you're with someone Me? I don't even know her.
She's wearing my dress and my shoes.
She is? Oh, wait.
It's so clear to me now.
I've just been making her a substitute for you-- a shoddy replacement that I tried to dress up like you in a sad attempt to fill my empty, aching heart.
You're full of crap.
No, it's true.
I'm begging you here.
You're the only woman for me.
She means nothing to me.
Nothing personal, baby.
Lila! wait! Wait for me! - Welcome to the human race.
- I want to be a magic genie again.
It's all gone.
Chett! - What? - Valadja wants more chocolate sauce.
You know, I'm starting to think that this whole Bulgarian Circus thing is just one big joke on me.
No joke.
Friends hungry.
Be right back.
Don't you have more fun here with us? Yeah, but someday I may want to try it again-- living on my own.
But not yet.
Whatever you want, Lis, we'll always be here.
And we promise not to freak out.
You got to live your life.
We got to live ours.
You can have yours.
I like being a genie.
Beverage, madame? Capioned by Grant Brown
If this were 1975 we'd be totally raging right now.
Yeah, yeah, it would be a party.
We'd all be listening to Captain & Tennille while free-spirited women with underarm hair - caress our bell bottoms.
- You make it sound like a bad thing.
Well, now, what do we have here? Looks like big brother Chett's been doing a little stealth-hacking unless you're downloading pictures of Semiautomatic Sandy.
Hello, ladies.
You're home early from the beauty parlor.
You've been busted, bro.
Okay, I admit it.
I've been using your computer.
And I'm glad you caught me because seeing the two of you standing there looking at me like I was some common criminal has reminded me of something very important.
I can still kick both your bony butts to the moon.
- But - It seems unfair but you're both going to feel a little bit better once you've fixed me a sandwich and brought me a beer.
Chop chop.
What just happened? I thought we had the upper hand.
Oh, how do you delete this Lisa file? It's taking up all the space on the hard drive.
It doesn't even do anything.
Look.
"Lisa.
" See? Nothing.
You left the file unprotected.
I know.
It was stupid.
- Anyone could have accessed me.
- WYATT: There were some safeguards.
Like what? You had to be able to spell "Lisa"? Chett surprise me, that's all.
Make it so we're the only two people who can call you up.
Come on, I've got an idea.
I suggest a pass-key system.
Choose a password and I'll take care of the security precautions.
That's okay.
You had your shot.
I'll choose the password this time.
I can handle it.
No, you're too predictable.
- Like someone will guess - "Telephone"? - Okay.
How about - "Desk lamp"? Then "carpet.
" Then "Lisa.
" Spelled backwards.
Okay.
I got one.
Good.
Let's try it out.
Now for the sealer.
( both yelling ) Lis, you got to give us some warning before you do that.
- I'm blind.
- There.
It's secure.
No files can be accessed.
No data can be read.
I can't even get into it.
Now try the password.
Let's open it up.
Gary, enter the password.
It's, uh uh - This is classic.
- You forgot the password? Sorry! It must have slipped my mind when you detonated that little hydrogen bomb a minute ago.
- I'll make up a new one.
- Let me help you understand this.
There is only one password and until you remember it my powers are in there, and I'm trapped out here.
- No magic? - No.
It's made of Titanic Beryllium.
Nothing can penetrate it.
I'm completely locked out.
No magic, no zapping, nothing.
We should have stayed with "telephone.
" WAYNE: Wyatt, are you in there? Dad! WAYNE: Wyatt, open up.
What are we going to do? He's going to see Lisa.
Be cool.
I knew something like this would happen someday.
I'm ready.
CHETT: Dad said now.
He means now! Don't make me get my fire axe and come Door's open.
I heard a noise.
And I smell something electrical.
Oh, my goodness.
I don't know you.
I don't either but I'd sure like to.
I'm Wayne Donnelly.
And you are? - I'm - Valadja Slavko.
She escaped in the middle of her trapeze act from a touring Bulgarian Circus.
Yeah, Dad, and I'm little Richard.
The father of rock and roll.
Is true.
Circus treats me very bad.
Must share tent with bearded lady and elephant boy.
- Gary and Wyatt rescue Slavia - Nadia.
- Valadja.
- from certain death.
And now they got the clowns and the dancing poodles looking for her.
I know it sounds crazy, but look, here's all her documentation.
Well, it certainly looks official.
Birth certificate, passport letter of commendation - from Siegfried and Roy.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're not seriously buying this, are you? This is obviously a scam job.
Please, kind sir don't send Valadja back to evil ringmaster.
Well, I suppose Wyatt's quiet respect and strong moral code have earned my trust.
And I'm sure by this time tomorrow he'll put this entire episode behind us.
- Isn't that right, Wyatt? - Absolutely.
Valadja can stay until then, right? She can stay in the guest house by herself for one day.
I'm going to figure this out.
Have a party.
"Clowns and dancing poodles"? - Any luck with that password? - I'm working on it.
Well, work faster.
I hate being trapped in this lame, little world.
You know what I mean.
What are we doing now? - Going to bed-- it's late.
- But I've never slept before.
I don't even know how.
You just take off all your clothes slip into the bed and press up against me as hard as you can.
- You'll be out in no time.
- Gary, don't you have to go? Oh, sure and leave you alone and teach Lisa how to do all the things she's never done before? What am I going to do? Wait for you to leave and teach her how to drive? Lisa, have you ever taken a shower? No.
- I know how you work.
- You're paranoid.
- GARY: Wyatt? - What? Is she asleep? I think so.
What time is it? she'd stop jabbering.
She was nervous.
It's probably the first time she's ever been unconscious.
( muttering ) I think she's dreaming.
You heartless bastard! WYATT: Lisa, what are you doing? Don't play dumb.
You were there watching him.
Thought you could juggle those poor, innocent puppies.
Where am I? Where's the blue giant? - And the snake with the pants? - You were dreaming.
It wasn't real.
Let go.
- But he was and you were - All in your head.
It happens when you go to sleep.
I'm sleeping on the floor.
Good.
That's where you deserve to sleep you stinking weasel.
It wasn't real.
Poor little puppies.
You remember that password yet buddy o' mine? She should be here somewhere.
She said she'd meet us after school, right? I am kind of thirsty, come to think of it.
Well, it looks like you got the human thing pretty much down.
Yeah, it's okay.
I miss my magic though.
You know I had to walk here? It took 15 minutes.
Tell me about it.
I haven't walked this much in months.
- Or paid for stuff.
- Or picked my nose.
Have I told you about that? I don't know what's so great about being human.
It's pretty boring, not to mention painful.
- What's so painful? - I feel like I have this water balloon in my stomach that's about to burst, and it just keeps getting worse.
Lisa, have you ever gone to the bathroom before? That's what that is.
How do you make it through a long movie? I'm sorry to interrupt, but I was watching you.
I know this is kind of forward but I think you're very beautiful.
Take a hike.
She's spoken for.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You guys are so much younger, I figured When you figure you make a fig out of "u" and "re.
" What does that mean? It means she's busy.
Why did you do that? He was kind of cute.
- He was going to ask me out.
- Oh, so you're dating now? Well, excuse me for trying to make the best of being human.
Excuse me for trying to learn about relationships and emotions.
Excuse me-- I have to go to the bathroom.
The toilet's the one without the faucets.
What? She has a right to date if she wants to.
I suppose.
But we set the rules.
No kissing, no touching, no nuzzling.
No romantic walks, comfortable silences or childhood stories.
No talking about sexy scenes in movies MTV videos or the diet coke guy.
No beer, no wine, no oysters.
Do we make ourselves perfectly clear? Yeah I guess.
Oh, hi.
Lisa, Steve you're on your own.
Be home by 11:00 or you're grounded.
Your parents are strict.
They're just very concerned friends.
I can see why.
Have you had dinner? I'd love to.
Your turn.
There, that's the last one.
- Now what? - What time is it? She's a little late.
Probably ditched him and went to a movie.
Exactly! - Want to play another game? - Good idea.
Scrabble, Risk, Monopoly, Candyland - Candyland! - You want to play Candyland? - I love Candyland.
- Candyland's for two-year-olds.
I remember the computer password.
It's horseradish.
Oh, that's great.
How do you get "horseradish" from "Candyland"? Duh.
Oh, I had a great time tonight, Lisa.
Me too.
I'm sorry I had to keep getting up.
That movie was pretty long.
This may sound like I'm moving kind of fast but we should have kids, move into a big house and spend the rest of our lives together.
- Or at least a second date.
- Oh, decisions, decisions.
Can I have a second date and the house? How about a cond date and a kiss? You're home.
About time too.
- Hi, guys.
- You have fun tonight? I know I did.
Hey, Lis, we got great news-- Gary remembered the password.
You can get back in the computer and get your magic powers.
Lis? I'm not going back.
I've decided I really want to be a human being.
So I'm going to try it for real.
No more computer genie stuff.
Isn't that great? BOTH: Great.
- Lisa, we got to talk.
- Yes, we do.
And Lisa wants to hear everything you have to say but first you have to help me find an apartment.
What does "FP WD LL" stand for? Fireplace, washer/dryer, lava lamp.
Oh, that sounds nice.
Lisa You have to go back into the computer.
( makes buzzer sound ) Sorry.
Wrong answer.
How are you going to survive on your own? You can't zap up food.
And how are you going to pay your rent? Wow.
You're right.
What was I thinking? I need a job first.
Jobs.
Jobs "pastry chef.
" Lisa, you don't know anything about living alone.
I won't be alone.
Steve's my boyfriend now.
Now I'm completely relieved.
Lis, you can't just jump in the real world like this.
You're not ready.
It's too big a step.
I'm doing it.
Then we're coming with you.
That's it.
We'll all move in together.
It'll be great.
We can hang out live by our own rules, carpool.
That sounds great, Gary, but I have to do this on my own.
I finally had a taste of what's it like to be human and I like it.
I like getting dressed and buying things.
And I like being in love and I like doing things for myself without the magic.
I need to do this.
- Will we still be able to see you? - Of course.
Hey, come over to Steve's place tomorrow night.
I'll make dinner.
it'll just be you two, me and Steve.
Don't worry.
I'll make a great human.
I've had great teachers.
Uh-oh.
Okay, it may not be exactly right but it's the first time I've ever tried anything without, you know help.
- What is it? - I kind of improvised.
See if you can tell.
- I'm getting fish? - Licorice.
Some kind of paint.
It's chicken.
- It's great - You're great.
Honey, would you mind getting me a beer? Cooking's one of those things you either do and do it well or she could care less.
- You guys cook? - Not professionally.
I probably shouldn't be telling you this but Lila, my ex, now, she was a great cook.
There would be something different every night-- pot roast, homemade pasta, lamb I saw a pasta dish I wanted to try.
Honey, I'm not finished.
Fish, beef, salads beef.
Oh, she could cook.
Did I tell you I have an interview? That was the great thing about Lila.
She didn't work so she had plenty of time for us for the relationship.
But, hey, yeah, everybody's different.
Lis, can I help you with the dishes? She's pretty hot, isn't she? So, what do you think of him? He's a pig.
You should dump him and come home with us.
I can't.
He's not perfect but every relationship takes work.
I just need to try harder.
I am getting better at being human, aren't I? Yeah.
You're getting better.
- You wash, I'll dry? - Huh? Anyone up for dessert? You don't think men and women belong together? I'm saying no couple can stay together forever - because animal instinct takes over.
- Animal instinct? Explain this to me.
Steve, maybe we should talk about something else.
It's like we're in this big human jungle and we got to keep moving meeting other animals, mating, hunting Killing the weak and eating their flesh.
No.
- You don't get it.
- I get it.
You don't want to date one woman.
- Steve, maybe we - Lila, please.
I mean, uh Lisa.
Yikes.
Deja vu.
Why are you doing this? If they keep fighting, they'll break up.
Who are we to decide who Lisa loves or doesn't? Do you want her wasting the rest of her life with this jerk? Getting her heart broken? Sleeping with him? You know, Steve, Lisa put this whole dinner together.
The least you could do is thank her for it.
She knows I appreciate it.
Who's "she"? Lisa or Lila? He's right, Steve.
You could have said something.
And my name is not Lila.
It's Lisa.
I know.
I don't want you to be Lila.
He just wants you to cook like her.
- Stay at home like her.
- That's not true.
I'm here with you.
Yeah, but for how long? Like you say, you got to keep moving and hunting.
Mating.
If it's so impossible for you to be with just one woman maybe I should leave.
Maybe you should, you freaky chick.
- Fine.
- Fine! - Fine! - Fine! Lila looked better in that dress than you do.
Lisa, wait.
So close.
Look, I'm sorry.
A little too late for that, buddy.
Yeah, she's not talking to you.
We are out of here.
I just get so afraid of losing you.
You're so beautiful and so smart.
I want to make it work.
Then move in with me.
If you're serious, I'll move in tonight.
I am very serious.
I've never been more serious with anyone.
I want to be with you forever.
( knocking ) Hello? Lila? What are you doing here? Steve, I had to see you again.
- Who's this? - Nobody.
Nothing.
What? I came to give you another chance but if you're with someone Me? I don't even know her.
She's wearing my dress and my shoes.
She is? Oh, wait.
It's so clear to me now.
I've just been making her a substitute for you-- a shoddy replacement that I tried to dress up like you in a sad attempt to fill my empty, aching heart.
You're full of crap.
No, it's true.
I'm begging you here.
You're the only woman for me.
She means nothing to me.
Nothing personal, baby.
Lila! wait! Wait for me! - Welcome to the human race.
- I want to be a magic genie again.
It's all gone.
Chett! - What? - Valadja wants more chocolate sauce.
You know, I'm starting to think that this whole Bulgarian Circus thing is just one big joke on me.
No joke.
Friends hungry.
Be right back.
Don't you have more fun here with us? Yeah, but someday I may want to try it again-- living on my own.
But not yet.
Whatever you want, Lis, we'll always be here.
And we promise not to freak out.
You got to live your life.
We got to live ours.
You can have yours.
I like being a genie.
Beverage, madame? Capioned by Grant Brown