Wellington Paranormal (2018) s03e02 Episode Script

1 So, day six out here in the bush, in Mother Nature.
We've run into a bit of a problem.
Something's taken my food! I'm sure I had enough for the full duration.
But not a problem when you know what you're looking for out here.
More of a challenge.
Positivity! If you like this video, press 'like' now and subscribe.
Something's gotten in my tent! These rips are massive! Might have been a possum.
Pretty big possum, though.
Shouldn't be a problem.
The power of positivity.
I see it as a challenge.
Press 'like' now if you feel the same.
WHISPERS: So, I can hear something outside my tent.
(LOW GROWLING, LEAVES CRUNCH) (BREATH ES HEAVILY) I don't think it is a possum, actually.
(GROWLING, FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) (GASPS) What do we do? We check it out - check out what it is.
Not a problem.
Positive power.
- (YELPS, SCREAMS) - (CREATURE YELLS) So, something has me by the leg.
Quite a freaky experience being dragged along in this manner.
If you like the ride, hit 'like' too.
Oh my God, this thing's immensely powerful! I'm gonna try and get a look at whatever it is.
(GRUNTS) Oh my gosh! It's not human! It's some kind of freaky freak! (SCREAMS) ('WELLINGTON PARANORMAL' THEME MUSIC) Captions by Able.
(CREATURE SNARLS) (MUSIC CONTINUES) - MAAKA: All right.
All right.
(CLEARS THROAT) Mouths closed, eyes open, backs straight, faces forward.
Attitudes strong.
- How's this, Sarge? - That's pretty good, actually.
As you all know, the police station was broken into last night.
This is highly embarrassing for all of us.
You should all be embarrassed.
It's especially embarrassing for me because I'm the Senior Sergeant.
Yeah? Should be embarrassing for you, O'Leary, Minogue, Smith, Raulton, and- (DRAMATIC DRUM MUSIC) Parker, is that jersey regulation? WEAKLY: No, it's angora, Sarge.
You are aware that we all have a strict uniform code? Yeah.
Yeah, I am aware of that, Sarge.
Erm, it's just that my mum, she, um She shrunk my other one in the-in when she was doing the wash.
Do you think she's gonna get in trouble for tampering with police property? I'd be willing to give her a stern telling-off.
- Minogue, no.
- No, Minogue.
You know, what are criminals gonna think if you show up to an arrest wearing that? Oh, well, I actually just arrested two perpetrators this morning, and they loved it.
They thought it was really nice and they loved the texture, and they thought it was a really good fit.
End of discussion.
Minogue and O'Leary, I would like you two to investigate the missing persons case in the Remutaka Ranges.
And officers - do not do that ever again.
All right.
Dismissed.
OK, guys.
Uh, pack your gear and bring some supplies.
We may be gone a few days.
And also, be prepared - to leave immediately.
- MINOGUE: Mm-hmm.
If we all have one, then, you know, we could petition to get it made into a uniform.
Sorry, where- Where are you guys going for a few days? - Going to the forest.
- Oh.
For reconnaissance? - Well, you could say that, yes.
- (EXHALES SHAKILY) - Can I come? - Not in that jersey.
- (SIGHS) Gotcha.
OK.
- So, we'll all convene at the Remutaka State Park, leaving approximately 0900 hours.
- Oh, can we make it tomorrow? - Absolutely not.
This is a missing persons case, Parker.
- Oh.
- Time is of the essence.
Yeah, one day won't matter, though, if they're- - Time is of the essence! - if they're dead already.
(DRAMATIC DRUM MUSIC) Uh, officers, I want you to meet the park ranger here.
- This is Park Ranger Anton.
- Kia or a.
Officer O'Leary.
- Gidday, Anton.
Officer Minogue.
So, yeah.
The old urban cops meet the, uh, the bush cop.
I'm pretty much the police around here, but the community I'm protecting is the community of the birds and the ferns.
Your first-degree murder out here equivalent would be littering.
That's the big one for us.
Either way, here, I'm the law.
Yeah.
So, a man's gone missing here.
Right.
Well, I'm not the law in that situation.
That's more you three.
We've got reason to believe he was abducted.
- Mm.
- And the reason being is we've got footage of that actually happening.
Any idea what might have done that? What, done the filming? No, no.
We know who did the filming.
It was the guy that was abducted.
We found his phone.
What we want to know is who did the abducting.
That's where the policing comes in.
Finding the phone - that's more the littering, possibly.
That's where you might come in.
'No, ' I think would be my answer there.
Right.
- I mean, I do know, but- - What was that? - Sorry? - What? What's that? - What's that? - No, what was that? That's exactly it.
What was that? That's a leading question.
You haven't seen anything out of the ordinary at all? No.
Not Well I have.
(CHUCKLES) But no.
Check that out.
(PAPER RUSTLES) What's that, then? - I don't know.
- You gave it to me.
- I didn't draw this.
- Oh, OK.
No, yeah.
Well, that's- Just be careful there.
That's potentially litter, isn't it? Look after that bit of paper.
I tell you what, if I saw that in the, uh, in the bush here, I'd be scared.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC) Well, welcome to my community.
Hey, what are some of the dangers that you guys face in town? Well, I mean, obviously there's a range of crimes.
I mean, you're sort of going right from embezzlement and that kind of thing through to, uh- - Car accidents.
- Mental psychopaths.
- Yeah, right.
- Graffiti.
I've heard, yeah, embezzlement's a big one.
Here, just to let you know, it's eye-level sticks.
So that would be the equivalent, I guess, of psychopaths for you guys.
You do a lot of running, I imagine, in town.
- Yep.
- Out here, you're running, and there' | | be eye-level sticks, and you'll get it- you'll cop it in the ol' googlies.
Look at that.
See? (SINISTER MUSIC) - Sharp, hidden by a leaf.
- Right.
There it is, and that's- Well, that's probably your eye level, see? And so- - There you go.
- Right there.
Right- - Exactly at the right height.
- And when you're running, if you're at a pace and going like this - Yep.
- and you might be pushing your leaves away, you push that away, stick revealed, in the eye.
(EXHALES SHARPLY) Close.
We should split up so we can cover more ground.
Um, I'll stick with Ranger Anton and you guys stick together.
O'LEARY: We'll go this way.
It's pretty dangerous out here.
Eyes open, but be prepared to shut them quickly.
I can't stress that enough.
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC) So, we're looking for any signs of a struggle - anything like that.
The personal effects of the missing person.
- Or the missing person.
- Oh, absolutely.
I mean, the missing person.
I mean, that'd be a real win.
- Found a lot of, um, trees.
- Good work, Minogue.
I was just saying that, you know, we're in the right area.
Officer O'Leary's just being a little bit snippy there, so I've come back with a witty 'report', and, uh, come out on top, - I'd have to say.
- Retort.
It's a retort.
Witty retort.
We're getting a little bit of cabin fever cos we've been out here for so long.
What Minogue's done there is he's used a classic passive-aggressive technique by talking to me through the camera.
I mean, obviously like he was trying to allude to, things can get a bit tense out here.
Maybe it's just cos we're staying in tents.
(BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY) (OMINOUS MUSIC) This looks like one of the ferns from the video.
Do you think they maybe all look quite similar to the ones in the video? The victim was dragged that way.
MAAKA: Found his tent! The victim was dragged this way.
ANTON: Watch out for eye-level sticks.
Pretty messed up, eh? What do we think could have done all this? Yeah, if I was to put money on it, rodents.
Have you seen this kind of thing happen before out here? Yeah, I'd be lying if I said 'yeah'.
Groups of vicious wild cats - or rats.
Yeah.
- Mm.
Wouldn't they have to be highly organised to all get together and drag a human man through the bush? Most likely, yeah.
I'd say it'd be a sort of a plan.
A planned event.
That's the outcome of that.
If you do want to get hold of me via radio any time - and that means any time night or day - - for anything - Yep.
you can't.
I just- I just don't have a radio.
OK.
Uh, will you be around later tonight, then? Tonight.
It's a full moon, innit? Um no, I most likely MUTTERS: might kill ya if I come back.
- Sorry? - What was that? Sorry? No.
Tonight is out.
(CREATURE HOWLS) - OK, guys.
My presentation's ready.
Um, so come over to the secret tent.
Um, by 'secret tent', do you mean this big one? Yeah, this one here.
Yeah.
Please forgive the makeshift nature of this mobile HQ.
Come on in, guys.
(TENT DOOR ZIPS) OK.
Theories, guys - I want to hear them.
And go.
Well, we've actually got one that we've come up with, - haven't we? - That's right.
Relating to - the park ranger, Anton.
- Mm-hmm.
What about him? You remember when we were talking to him, and he said really quietly that if it was a full moon, there was a potential that he might murder us? - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
So, we're gonna put those two facts together, and, um, we sort of realised that maybe he was actually a werewolf.
And then subsequently, we both remembered that we've seen a documentary where we saw him transform on camera into a werewolf.
Mm.
I mean, it feels open and shut.
- Dammit.
That's a good theory.
That's a really good theory.
Sounds like you've got it sussed.
I also had a theory.
I've spent quite a bit of time on it, as you can see.
- Yeah.
- Um, so, if you wouldn't mind, um, would you like to hear it? - I'd love to.
That'd be great.
- Yeah, love to hear it.
Throughout history, all around the world, there's been well-known folklore and actual reported sightings of large, prehistoric hairy men.
- Mm.
- Is it just men? Let's just call them 'hominids'.
Here.
North America? Sasquatch.
Bigfoot.
Tibet and the Himalayas? The Meh-Teh, or the yeti.
Australia? Yowie.
China has the Yeren.
England has the woodwose.
Here, we have a depiction of the woodwose here.
I believe this is a fully grown tree here.
Look how it towers above it.
So - It's got one - One stick.
one tiny little bit of leaf coming off the side of it.
Do you have any, um, like, photographic evidence - of these creatures? - Yeah, I do, actually.
OK.
Lighting down.
OK.
Here, we have a picture of Bigfoot in Utah in the 1970s.
And next, this is what is purported to be - the Orang Pendek in Sumatra.
- That's convincing.
Mm.
And, uh, lastly, what we have here is in Afghanistan - what is believed to be a Barmanou.
Sarge, that's just, like, a red circle on a photo.
The focal point here is in-in the middle of the circle there.
It's exactly what's in the rest of the photo.
Look, are there any of these, you know, reported creatures in New Zealand, though? Uh, actually, there have been a handful of sightings in Aotearoa.
In Maori, we have a word for them.
We call them, uh, tupua ngahere, which means 'forest giant' or 'forest guardian'.
Are they maybe more, sort of, mythological than real? People thought the same thing about the giant squid - until around about 2004.
- Yeah, and they're not real.
They are real.
We went and saw the giant squid at Te Papa, remember? Oh, I didn't think it was real.
Taking all of that into consideration, you know, put these side by side, look at the similarities.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC) O'LEARY: Still can't actually- I can't see the other one.
OK.
What if I do that? - Looks like a werewolf? - Yeah, no.
OK.
(DISTANT CLATTERING, GROWLING) The hell was that? Oh, what? Look, it's taken all our food.
MAAKA: Oh, holy hika.
MINOGUE: And messed my bed up.
(PENSIVE MUSIC) We, uh, made quite an exciting discovery this morning.
Yeah.
It's just past here.
I think you guys are gonna be quite excited as well.
Watch your step.
- Scat.
- Doobie-doobie-doo-wop? - No.
- Scoobidy-wah-wah! No, no, no.
No.
It's faecal matter - bigger than a human's.
- Ooh.
- Ooh.
Well done, Sarge.
No, it's not- It's not mine, O'Leary.
Do we have to keep looking at this? - No.
- We could take a photograph.
- That'd be good.
Portrait.
Yep.
- Nah, that's good.
That's it.
Now, that's looking really cool.
MAAKA: Uh, it's night two.
To be honest, it's been a little bit hard without our camp food.
But, uh, you know, the ngahere provides, and my officers have managed to forage together quite a nice, hearty meal- under my guidance, of course.
- Got a nice spiciness to it.
- Mm.
See, that there - that's the horopito leaves.
Gives it a good kick.
I'm really enjoying the contrast between the different types of fungi.
(UNSET-FLED MUSIC) Um Uh, sorry, there's only supposed to be one kind of fungi.
Oh.
Well, this mushroom's different to that mushroom.
Oh.
Uh, OK.
Are we sure we got the same kind of mushroom, though? - Same kind? - Yeah.
There's only one.
Um, I drew a diagram.
Can I- Can I see that diagram? - So, the one on the r- - We got these mushrooms.
Ah, OK.
Yeah.
Cool.
- And these mushrooms.
- Those ones.
Mostly these ones, but we found some of those too.
- OK.
So, spoon down.
Just don't have any more.
OK.
That's just concerning because that one - there on the left? - Mm-hmm? That is a Class A substance.
Class A? So that means it's the best? That means it's an illegal drug.
Not only that, but it's known to cause psychosis, hallucinations, and in some extreme cases, paralysis.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) (WHIMPERS SOFTLY) - (WHIMPERS) - Move your fingers, Sarge.
- MUTTERS: I can't.
- You can.
(WHIMPERS) (EXCLAIMS, SIGHS) OK.
OK.
OK.
I think we're gonna be all right, guys.
(PANTS) CHUCKLES: I think we're gonna be all right.
- I was freaking out.
- (EXHALES HEAVILY, LAUGHS) Oh, no! There's a werewolf! WHIMPERS: There's a werewolf, guys! (SOBS) Maybe- Maybe I'm the werewolf.
(MYSTICAL MUSIC) The forest is angry at me, but I- but I'm a good boy.
(YELPS) Oh, no! Oh! I'm changing! I'm changing! (GRUNTS) Here's the full moon! This transformation has begun! (GRUNTS, HOWLS) (UPBEAT RAVE MUSIC) (MAAKA HOWLS) (MOREPORK HOOTS) Uh, it would appear that my officers and I have- uh, had, earlier on, accidentally ingested some mind-altering substances.
This is highly illegal, and in the interest of public safety, we have placed each other under arrest.
I've arrested Minogue here.
And I've arrested, uh, Sergeant Maaka.
Officer O'Leary is still at large, but I've got eyes on her.
Mm.
So, um, do we think that we're in a better state to police now? I, uh, certainly think that being handcuffed together is not going to help our policing at all.
Um, I think it was an unwise decision.
- Yep.
- And I think, furthermore, throwing away the keys was also an error of judgement.
Yeah.
I agree.
I agree.
Decisions were made, regretfully.
With that being said, we do have a zero tolerance towards drug abuse, and so, um with that being said, do you think that we are in a better position to police now? N-No.
- (LEAVES RUSTLE) - Whoa, what was that? What was that? - No, we need- - Here.
Yeah, go, go, go, go.
(RUSTLING CONTINUES) WHISPERS: Turn the lights off.
MINOGUE: Go to night mode.
MAAKA: Crap, that looks like the creature.
MINOGUE: Is that a werewolf? - Put your arm up.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
O'LEARY: Be careful.
You're gonna hit the camera guy.
- Look out.
- Look, out, Kevin! Oh, where'd it go? Oh, dammit.
- MINOGUE: Shall we go home? - MAAKA: I feel like going home.
O'LEARY: I feel like someone's touching me.
MINOGUE: Just wanna go home.
MAAKA: Don't freak it out.
Don't freak it out.
Tranquil movements - non-threatening.
- It's not- - Oh my God.
It's waving.
- Can you see that? - Yes.
Um, what are you doing, O'Leary? - I just, um - Yeah.
And what about you, Minogue? I'm closing my eyes and wishing this day was over.
OK.
Just nice, gentle movement.
Even more gentle than that.
Hello, majestic creature.
We bid you peaceful greetings.
- Hi, guys.
- Oh.
That was a really peaceful greeting.
Parker, what are you doing? I've been trying to find you guys for ages.
What are you wearing? Oh, this is my ghillie suit that my mum made for me when I was in the Territorials.
It's really good for camouflaged reconnaissance.
Probably look like a floating head, do I? (CHUCKLES) (MOANS EERILY) Oh.
Whoa.
Tennis? Tennis anyone? 15-love.
Bumblebee.
(BUZZES) Oh, look.
A beautiful hebe.
(BUZZES) Can you stop doing that, please, Parker? It's freaking me out.
Anyway, look at me go invisible again, guys.
- I'm gone! - ANTON: Oh, there you are! - My fellow officers of the law.
- Hi.
- Thought I'd check on ya.
- Um, we're all right.
We had a bit of a false alarm, that's all.
Did you think that was the creature? What creature? I didn't say 'creature'.
Hang on.
What creature? Oh, we just thought you might have been some kind of- Hey! Big, hairy creature! Come on, O'Leary.
I've put on a little bit of weight - over winter, but- (SCREAMS) - (CREATURE ROARS) - ANTON: Oh my God! (PARKER SCREAMS) Hey, did you want me to tranquilise it? - Yes! - Yes.
Yeah, thought you would.
Because they don't give us tranquiliser guns, - so I can't help you there.
- OK.
In pursuit! Why don't you guys chase it and I'll hang back? We're handcuffed together, Minogue.
Come on, Minogue! Parker's in trouble.
Well, you can see I'm coming with you.
The creature is clearly not following the official tracks.
- I mean, that can't be safe.
- SOFTLY: Oh my God.
Look.
(CREATURE GROWLS) - I need to get my phone.
- So, um, we've followed the creature to this area where it seems to have made some sort of a shelter.
At the moment, it's unaware of our presence.
It's an incredibly large creature.
Minogue, are you trying to saw your hand off with a stick? I thought I'd just whip it off and - go and warm the car up.
- Nah, nah.
You stay put.
Feels like we're just about done here.
Nah, nah.
We're not done here.
Just stay here.
(CREATURE GRUMBLES SOFTLY) Oh my God.
Is this one of those legends you've told us about? Yeah.
Pretty sure that this is a Maero or hakituri.
Legend tells of an ancient man-animal.
- Amanimal? - Yeah.
Yeah, if you like.
Its claws are as sharp as an axe.
Most of the tales actually paint it out to be a very dangerous and malevolent creature, so we should stay absolutely silent.
(TE MAERO ROARS WILDLY) CHANTS: Ka mate! Ka mate! Ka or a.
Ka mate, ka mate! Ka or a! Ora! Tenei te tangata puhuruhuru TE MAERO: Tangata puhuruhuru? K0 au tena? Ah, mo taku he.
Koira nga kupu iho o taua haka.
Uh, kia manawanui mai a Te Maero tawhito.
K0 matou k0 Minogue, k0 O'Leary, k0 Ruawai Maaka.
No matou te he.
Kua aurara ketia e matou to ngahere tap (TE MAERO GROWLS SOFTLY) - Tell him to have a good night.
- Kia pai to p0.
- And from me too.
- Uh, kei te mihi.
Kei a koe to matou hoa.
No reira, whakawete I a ia me tukuna mai ki a matou.
Oh, to koutou hoa tenei? Ah, it believes that Parker is one of them.
TE MAERO: Hey, hang on.
I didn't say that.
- Oh.
Do you speak English? - Yes, and a little Swedish I learned from a tourist in the '60s.
(SPEAKS SWEDISH) I think I said, 'Hello.
Would you like schnapps?' I don't know what schnapps is.
Uh, excuse me.
Te Maero, could you tell us what brings you to our part of the island? I.
“ I'm lonely.
For aeons, I wandered through the forests, over the mountains to find my mate, and now I have found the one.
Oh, he's beautiful.
Ah.
Mm.
- MAAKA: OK.
Uh, ah - (GROWLS SOFTLY) That's a- That's a very sad story there.
But, um, well, you see, that over there is Constable Parker, and he's not actually one of your species.
Parker, can you do us a favour, please? Can you please remove your hood? Thank you.
Yeah.
I'm so sorry to disappoint.
Ow.
I've been in this situation before.
When have you been in this situation before? Well, not exactly this situation, but looks like I've done it again.
Good one, Parker (!) Sorry if I've lead you on.
- Are you looking for a female? - Well, no, a- a male.
See? You can't just, uh, assume.
I am a female of my species.
This happens to me all the time.
You know, quite often in shops, I get called 'sir'.
People just, you know, looking at you and making a judgement just on your appearance, - and that's not OK.
- TE MAERO: Yeah, I understand.
And males - you know, they're hairy and their voices are so GROWLS: low.
I just thought this was a tiny one, but that's OK.
I understand, and after all you've told us about your sad tale, we feel really bad for you, but you're still going to need to let him go.
I- Well, uh (SIGHS GRUFFLY) There's just one more thing we need from you, though.
Have you by any chance seen, um, this man? Uh Oh, yes! I've seen him.
Right.
Do you know of his whereabouts? Oh, yeah.
In my puku.
(CHUCKLES) Um, ma'am, I'm afraid we're going to have to - place you under arrest.
- (SNARLS) Parker, please detain this woman.
Yes, sir! Oh, I don't know if the cuffs will fit around her wrists.
- (TE MAERO ROARS) - (SCREAMS) (ALL EXCLAIM, SCREAM) She overwhelmed me, Sarge.
- MAAKA: In pursuit! In pursuit! - O'LEARY: In pursuit! - Come on.
Come on.
- There he is, Sarge.
MAAKA: She's getting away! (EXCLAIMS, GRUNTS) Obstruction.
Obstruction.
Obstruction.
MINOGUE: Preparing pepper spray! (SPRAY HISSES) Testing pepper spray.
(YELLS) What's happening? - I lost 100% of visuals.
- Leave him behind! (GRUNTS) (GROWLS) (YELPS) An eye-level stick! MAAKA: No! She's getting away! No! Come back! ECHOES: Maero! Maero! - (TE MAERO ROARS) - She got away.
Back into the ngahere.
- (O'LEARY PANTS, GRUNTS) - Aue.
So close, so far.
Did you know it actually tastes like pepper? Won't lie - pretty gutted.
Um, but, uh Yeah, all around, pretty unsuccessful for the Wellington Police.
Uh, but I guess the scientific community will be very interested in the footage we managed to capture.
So yeah, at the end of the day, I guess it is quite successful.
- Another job well done.
- Nah.
Nah.
ANTON: I see the eye-level sticks got ya.
Yeah.
Psychopaths of the forest - I told ya.
Who's that? - It's, uh, Anton.
- Anton.
- Ranger Anton? - Yeah.
Must hurt.
And you're gonna have trouble driving back to the city all handcuffed.
Could you please call 111? - You are 111, aren't ya? - Well, we're one of the 111s.
Well, you're in luck.
I do have a cell phone.
- Yes! - Unfortunately, though, there's no reception out here.
(MAAKA CLEARS THROAT)