Alexa & Katie (2018) s03e03 Episode Script

1 [ALEXA.]
It had been a month since I met Spencer.
It was the classic story of girl meets boy, girl finds out boy has cancer, girl gives boy advice, support, and the names of nurses with the coldest hands.
Okay.
Right, right, right, right, right, right, right.
And left, left, left, left.
Straight.
Straight.
Turn and sit.
Oh, a coffee.
I was letting Spencer know that I would hang out with him during his chemo tomorrow.
Ooh.
So it's finally going from intense texting to spending time together.
It's not like that.
It's just better if I'm there in person because last time we texted through his entire appointment and it killed my data plan.
You have unlimited data.
I mean, so my fingers don't cramp up.
You have unlimited excuses.
Hey, I don't pay you to push muffins around.
Oh, I'm on my break.
[GROANS.]
We've talked about this.
You are legally required to give them to me.
Fine.
I can't take another lawsuit.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
So you were talking about Spencer.
I mean, he's great and funny but he's going through a lot right now.
And what he needs is a friend who gets it.
And I get it.
You do.
Um You sure it won't be too much to be back in the infusion room? Yep.
I've put cancer behind me.
Far behind me.
It's in the rear view mirror - and I'm stepping on the gas.
- [GIGGLES.]
Yeah, in this fantasy, I have my driver's license.
Hey, guys.
Katie, did you see your study group test scores? Peggy just emailed them to everyone.
Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.
Where's my phone? Where's my phone? - In your hand.
In your hand.
- [GASPS.]
What's up, girls with a "z"? Oh, great, now she's hanging out with us after school too? She showed up at my synagogue last week.
Okay, I've been busting my butt in the study group, so I have a good feeling that my score is going to be, okay completely disappointing.
You've been studying non-stop.
If your score's bad, I'm sure everyone else's is.
How'd you do? Uh, I don't remember.
You told me you showed that test who was boss, and then you did a little dance.
Show them the dance! That was a private conversation.
I love how you don't get things, Hannah.
[BOTH LAUGHING.]
You're putting too much pressure on yourself.
Test scores are just a part of your college resume.
There are so many other things that you've done, like playing Juliet and studying theater in London.
That's cute.
But colleges are really looking for things that demonstrate leadership.
For example, I'm captain of the debate team.
All I do to win is talk until the other person cries.
She's right, I'm coaching my little brother's soccer team, and I don't like sweat, or kids, or my brother.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
I'm thinking about going out for basketball team captain this year.
Great, so everyone has leadership stuff except Hannah and me? I've been running a park clean-up every Tuesday for two years.
There's a lot you don't know about me.
Um, do you Do you need any help? Sure, we have one tomorrow.
You can be a team captain if you want.
Okay, this is great.
Wow.
Thank you, Hannah.
[CHUCKLES.]
Well, if anyone needs a place to sleep after today, feel free to use my resume.
Because it's gonna be padded [LAUGHS.]
- What? I think she's funny.
- Yeah.
Heh heh! I've got you When I can't take it any longer You make me feel stronger I've got you When I can't take it you make it so much better We'll do this together Oh-oh-oh-oh we'll do this together I've got you Oh-oh-oh-oh We'll do this together [SIGHS.]
I'm back! Hi.
[SIGHS.]
I couldn't wait to get back home and work on the gazebo.
[DAVE GRUNTS.]
Well, and to see you.
Oh, we both do class-up the place.
[BOTH CHUCKLE.]
Look at him studying.
I'm so proud.
When I landed the plane, I announced over the loudspeaker my son's gonna be a doctor.
Everyone applauded.
Uh, he's He's been drumming with his eyes closed for the past hour with a little of this thrown in.
First, you should take up the keyboard.
I like whatever that was.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
- Uh, second, maybe we should help him out.
- Oh.
Hey, son.
How's it going? Good.
Is it, though? Oh, yeah.
Is it? Yeah.
Hey, listen to this.
Girl, you know my heart Lucas if you wanna be a doctor, you really have to focus.
What about making flashcards? You know, in high school, they used to call me Grandmaster Flashcard.
- I don't know what that means.
- Great idea.
Yeah, I'll go grab the markers.
Oh! I'll change and meet you back here.
Grandmaster Flashcard and DJ Memorizer [MIMICS RECORD SCRATCH.]
In da, in da, in da house Hey, where should I meet you at the park, Hannah? Okay, so I'll see you in front of the tree that looks like your grandma, yeah.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
Oh, I just need to put on my gi and I'll be ready to go.
Uh, go where? I thought you were at Kyle's after school Tuesdays.
My taekwondo class got moved, remember? You promised Mom you'd take me.
You promised Mom you'd brush your teeth.
You really wanna go there? You can't break the taekwondo promise.
Okay.
Okay, I was saving this for a special occasion, but what if instead we clean up a dirty park? [GRUNTING.]
No way I'm missing taekwondo.
I love it! Ap chagi! Naju magki! [BATTLE CRY.]
[SIGHS.]
Okay, okay.
Just go change.
We'll be safer with a taekwondo master in the house.
You said the same thing about tap dancing.
Have we have been robbed since I started doing tap? Just go.
Hey.
Hey.
I'm really happy you came.
How's it going? Turns out this is not the best way to spend the day, but my mom's constant blanket adjustments were really fun.
[LAUGHS.]
Where is your mom? Oh, I sent her home to find my phone.
Nice.
I wish I would have thought of that.
Spencer, I didn't know your girlfriend was coming today.
Oh, no, I'm not his girlfriend.
Yeah, I'm a friend, and I'm a girl.
I'm a friend-girl.
Yeah, this is my friend-girl Alexa.
I'll be back in a bit to flush your port.
Perfect.
I was gonna run a quick 5K.
I'll meet you back here.
[CHUCKLES.]
Well, she must be new.
I'm kind of a legend around here.
Have you heard of Jell-O Jenga yet? Yeah, that was me.
[CHUCKLES.]
In fact, I did my chemo in the same room.
So you were the one that drew all the mustaches on the Monopoly money.
Alexa? Oh, yeah.
Uh, I brought you all kind of choices for your armchair entertainment: movies, games, conversation.
Well, maybe we can watch a movie based on a game and then talk about it.
You've done this before.
Yeah.
[CHUCKLES.]
Does this get easier if you pretend it's not happening? I, um [PHONE RINGS.]
Do you need to get that? Nah, it's just my mom trying to find my phone.
[CHUCKLES.]
Hm.
After Wired, school and SAT prep, this was the only free time I had for a leadership job, so now I'll never get into college.
I hope you're happy.
I am happy.
I love it here! Okay, listen up.
I have a couple announcements.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
One, my assistant quit this morning to pursue the surf life.
Danielle, keep your yellow belt on your mouth, okay? [CLEARS THROAT.]
And two, we will begin momentarily.
[SPEAKING KOREAN.]
He needs an assistant.
I mean that would be perfect for my college resume.
What says leadership more than teaching confidence-boosting athletics to small irritating children? Hey, I'm not small.
And you don't know anything about taekwondo.
[SCOFFS.]
Yeah, well, neither did you a month ago.
- Hi.
Hi, I'm Jack's sister, Katie.
- Oh.
I heard you say you lost your assistant.
Yeah, well, I would just love the job, and I don't surf.
Yeah, I'm afraid of sharks, so You know taekwondo? Ap chagi! Najundi magki! [BATTLE CRY.]
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
Does that answer your question? One, there are no such things as answers.
Two, show me your double spinning back kick.
One, I would normally show you that, but, two, class started five minutes ago, and, three everyone starts their path to teaching somewhere.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
- Well spoken.
- Really? I used to be a catalog model.
Really? But a kick to the face broke my nose and ended my career.
To make sure it will never happen again, I turned to taekwondo.
And now, I pass on its ancient traditions to kids 12 and under.
As will you.
Oh, wow.
Thank you.
[GASPS.]
[SPEAKING KOREAN.]
Thank you.
And that is how you get into a great college.
Yeah, liars college.
Taekwondo is a serious art.
Attention, 12 and unders! [CLEARS THROAT.]
This is my new assistant instructor Katie.
I don't like her.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
One! Group one will come with me into room two.
Two! Group two will stay here in room one with Katie.
And show her where the towels are, okay, guys? Uh.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Oh.
Wow, I have my own group.
Aw, look at you in your gis.
Gis, Louise.
Come on, that was clever, right? This is gonna be awful.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
Lucas, you know this one.
[HUMMING.]
[HUMMING.]
It's "left ventricle"! We've been working on these all afternoon! This is not how my brain works.
Okay, we're all a little frustrated.
[SIGHS.]
Why don't we take a five? [CHUCKLES.]
[SIGHS.]
Why aren't these flashcards working? Maybe it's your handwriting.
What's wrong with my handwriting? Well, honey, I love it, but your A's look like D's and your D's look like upside down P's.
D's are upside down P's.
[LUCAS SINGING.]
Girl, you know my heart We lost him.
Is a very important part Of my cardiovascular system Yeah, and I'll never wrestle with my love of blood vessels They pump my blood so don't dismiss 'em Yeah, arteries carry blood from my heart Veins carry back so our love can start The aorta is the body's trunk It's the main artery that controls my funk Are you hearing this? He knows every term.
Do you realize what this means? We did it.
[CHUCKLES IN DISBELIEF.]
Yeah, we did it.
Hello, friends.
- Hey.
- Hey! Could you keep an eye on Jack tomorrow night? I have a date.
Honey, that's great.
You finally feel ready? Nope.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
But now I'm paying for the app, so I gotta use it.
[SIGHS.]
Well, I mean, you guys gonna go to dinner? What's the plan? I thought I'd just rely on my natural charm.
[SMALL CHUCKLE.]
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
You know, Dave and I can help you prep.
Totally.
- We're on fire, helping people today.
- Yeah.
You know, I don't really need help.
No, look, we'll roleplay with you to practice.
This'll be great.
- You're moving me over here.
- Yeah.
[DAVE CLEARS HIS THROAT.]
Hi, Jennifer.
Uh, I'm Dave.
It's great to meet you.
It's great to meet you, too.
[CHUCKLES.]
- We've got a lot of work to do.
- [DAVE GRIMACING.]
Uh, "Bradley Beal".
Uh, "Beal".
Okay, an "L" name "LeBron James".
"S".
Oh! You're in trouble now.
"Steph Curry".
Oh, "Y".
"Y".
[BUZZER NOISE.]
"Yao Ming", Houston Rockets.
- Aaah.
All right give me another.
- Sorry, no do-overs.
Who made that rule? Uh, the people who make all of the rules: the winners.
We run the world.
Okay, you won.
But I blame chemo brain.
I'm kidding.
You won because I let you.
[SCOFFS.]
Sure you did.
Hey, Spencer.
It's time to flush your port.
Is it okay if I do it while your friend's here? Well, normally, I like to know a girl a bit longer before I let her see my port.
But go ahead.
I'll wait over here.
You guys do this a lot.
Just for the patients we like.
Just helps us make sure the line stays clean and keeps the medicines from mixing.
It gives you a chance to get away from Nurse Claudia.
Ugh, Nurse Claudia, we get it.
You're certified to teach yoga.
It's not the flushing I mind as much as the weird taste I get every time.
The metal taste.
It's so gross.
Two more bags and you're all done.
You know what? You're tired, I'm gonna go.
I'm not tired.
You don't have to go.
Trust me, you're gonna get tired, and when you do, I'm just gonna be sitting here babbling on and on, and you'll be sitting there, trying to stay awake and wishing that I had left when I said, "You're tired, I'm gonna go".
I'll text you later.
You should hear what Nurse Claudia says about you.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
And that is our last stretch on our left side.
Let's do our right.
[CLASS GROANING.]
Okay, okay.
Symmetry is a big part of taekwondo.
You know what else is a big part of taekwondo? Doing taekwondo.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
How's it going here? Oh, totally.
Huh! Class is over in five minutes, right? - Thirty-five.
- Oh, good! I was afraid I was gonna have to stop doing this soon.
[CHUCKLES.]
Thank you.
Thanks.
Um, so why don't we practice our front kicks? We did front kicks last week.
This week is turning roundhouse kicks.
Of course, of course.
Um.
But first, we have to meditate.
- No, we don't.
- Yes, we do.
Okay, so everyone come on, come on.
Sit down.
Good.
Close your eyes.
Turning roundhouse kick.
- Are you looking it up on the internet? - [SMALL YELP.]
No, Ainsley.
But do you happen to know what the Wi-Fi password is? 'Cause [AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
- I'm having a great time, Jennifer.
- [NERVOUS CHUCKLE.]
You know - being a pilot - He's a dentist.
You know, being a dentist I spent a lot of time in the sky.
Okay.
But you're the first person to make me feel like my feet have left the ground.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
And I'll never wrestle with my love of blood vessels - I can't decide what to get.
- [LUCAS HUMMING IN BACKGROUND.]
Everything looks so good.
Oh, why don't we just order a bunch of stuff and share? Oh, I love doing that.
I wanna be on a date with Jennifer.
Okay.
[CLEARS THROAT AND SIGHS.]
It's really nice to meet you.
Wait, are we starting over or is this the same guy? You have the most beautiful eyes.
Oh, never mind.
I like this guy.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
The aorta is the body's trunk It's the main artery that controls my funk You know, you look way too young to have kids.
I don't have kids.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
[LAUGHS.]
Oh! Jennifer, uh, next you should tell that story where, um You know what? I'll just show you.
- Get up.
Go, go, go, go, go.
[GRUNTS.]
- Oh, okay.
She could tell the story about that time at the lake.
Oh, yes, that's perfect.
And then I could do the laugh and look away.
- [GIGGLES.]
- Aaah! We are crushing this date.
- Yes, we are.
- You guys should come with me on the date.
- [LORI AND DAVE.]
Really? - No.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING.]
Uh, excuse me? Excuse me, you guys.
You guys, could you be a little quiet for a sec? - [CLASS LAUGHING.]
- Okay? Hey! Now that I have your attention, as promised, we are going to do turning roundhouse kicks.
Okay, so just, come on.
Watch and learn.
I hope.
- [SMALL GRUNT.]
- [LAUGHING.]
You're horrible.
Come on, please, guys.
I am just one girl just trying to show a little leadership, you know, so one day she can go to college.
She's using an old taekwondo teaching trick by showing us what not to do.
If she was doing it right, she'd do it like this.
Oh, yeah.
Well done, Jack.
[WHISPERING.]
Thank you.
Guess not all students are advanced enough to understand this kind of teaching.
- I bet she can't actually do it.
- [CHUCKLES.]
[SCOFFS.]
Oh yeah? Oh yeah? Prepare to be wowed.
[EXHALES.]
- Hi-ya! - Oooh! Oh, no! Oh, not again! [WHIMPERS.]
I'm sorry! Okay, I know there are no answers um, but am I fired? [AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
Hey, hey.
Did it go okay with Spencer? You were right.
Being in that room is a lot harder than I thought.
But I really wanna be there for Spencer.
Yeah.
I know.
[SIGHS.]
Do you think you could do both? You were there for me.
That's why I know how hard it is.
And, uh, I wasn't even reliving the worst part of my life.
It's okay if you can't do it.
I can.
I can.
So, tell me about taekwondo.
Oh, yeah, it was great.
I made enemies with a ten-year-old and I broke a man's nose.
I would not put that on your college application.
It's too bad you can't get a more leadership-y job here.
You're here all the time anyway.
Right? Wait.
Why can't I? Um Barry? I wanna talk to you about a promotion.
I'm sorry.
I think you have the wrong Barry.
Dah, wha Look, I've been here for over a year now.
I've opened, I've closed You've set my espresso machine on fire.
Then I fixed it.
I mean, I have leadership potential.
Remember it was my idea to sell the day-old doughnuts as sweet bagels? I did like that one.
Yeah, so what about making me assistant manager? I'm not paying you more.
That's okay.
I will just take the title and the responsibility.
No, wait, if I'm gonna be doing more, I'll need to be paid more.
So ? Do we have a deal? Okay, assistant manager.
Yes! That's my best friend! Sorry, go on.
There's something hairy under the freezer.
It's either a tennis ball or a mouse.
Either way, it's stuck under there real good.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]
[SQUEALS.]
I'm assistant manager! Do you know how great this is gonna look on a college application? Definitely better than kicking someone in the face.
[BOTH.]
Eh.
Mm.
Mm.
Aw, now I kinda want a fancy title.
Oh, well, as assistant manager I am promoting you to "CFO".
Uh, "Cool Friend O' mine".
I like it.
But you do have one duty.
Help me check under the freezer.
[SMALL CHUCKLE.]
And if it's a mouse I'll need you to get it.
And if it's a hairy tennis ball? I'll also need you to get it.
That's what I'm here for.
You see? This is why this works.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING.]