Cow and Chicken (1997) s03e03 Episode Script
Goin' My Way?
1
Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud, he didn't care how. ♪
Cow! ♪
Chicken! ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
Oh, one-thousand-five-hundred-and-six.
One-thousand-five-hundred-and-seven.
Fifteen-thousand-seven-hundred-and-twelve.
Sixty-two.
What are you doin', Cow?
I am playing "Count The Snowflakes"!
Seventy-five-gazillion-and-nine.
Why did I ask?
You know, Mama?
Drivin' in the snow with you and the kids
brings out the man in me!
My turn to drive!
Oh, dear!
Look at that poor fat kid
in the middle of winter with no pants!
Maybe he's European!
Where you headed, stranger?
Home?
What a coincidence!
That's just where we're going!
You can ride with us.
Hop in!
You know, Dad?
That Red Kid fits right in.
He's like the big, fat,
red son we never had.
I'd like some more Pork Flakes, Dad!
You appetite is so much
better than those other two kids.
The Chicken and the Cow.
Thanks loads, Dad.
Mom and Dad,
when is he gonna go home?
He is home!
What are ya? Jealous?
Quick, Mom! Would you look at this?
Our heavyset Red Kid's mowing the snow!
I could count the times
Cow and Chicken did that on one foot!
I have a feeling that this son
will make us proud, Mama.
Oh, it's you, son!
Why look, Mom.
Our Red Son brought us the newspaper.
That's a good boy!
You're the best son ever!
And then the three little bacon steaks
were put in the oven,
and baked at three-fifty,
smothered in chocolate.
The end.
Oh, that was beautiful!
Read me another story.
Cow never reads to me
from the Cook Book from anymore.
Oh, anything for you, Mom.
It's time for "The Manure The Bear Show."
Oh, goodie! Oh, my favorite show!
Hey! Down in front!
How do you expect
your new brother to see
what he's changing channels to?
"The Moon Channel"?
It's my favorite.
We gave you the top bunk
'cause you're tops in our hearts, son.
You're too kind!
I don't think I like this, Chicken.
Yeah. Me, neither.
He's stealin' Mom and Dad's
infections from us.
Sleeping like a rock already!
Shaving already?
How old are you, Son?
Eleven.
Aren't ya kinda big for eleven?
I'm big boned!
Big feet and big noses run in my family.
That's the bus!
Hurry, Son, or you're gonna be late!
Have a nice day at school, Son!
Bye, you other two guys.
Golly, we're going to have so much fun,
Brother and Sister!
What's so funny, you little
All right!
Who beaned me in the mellon?
Cow?
Chicken?
Extra homework for both of you
knuckleheads!
Hey, small sickly kid! I'll play ya.
Oh, the pain. Mother.
Oh, I think that big boned red boy
is really a big, fat, bad man.
Oh, that's it, Cow! He's not a boy at all!
He's a grown man!
And we gotta prove it to Mom and Dad!
We are so proud of you! All "F's"!
I just bet them "F's"
stand for "fat" and "fantastic"!
You know, Cow and Chicken
never got straight "F's"!
This is the second happiest day of my life.
What's the first happiest day, Dad?
Why, the day you came into our lives, Son.
Full Moon Club.
The Pantyhose of the Month Card.
Bingo!
Mom and Dad!
This pantsless kid has a driver's license!
A driver's license?
You mean he's a man?
Well, I
You know what this means, Dad?
You wait right here, Red.
You is in big trouble, pal!
They are on to yous!
Your scam has been revealed!
I can't take it!
Nothing is worth this agony!
I'm a fraud! No one likes me!
I'll never ride on the float at the Prom!
It's manhood time, ♪
throw out your pretty lace. ♪
It's manhood time, ♪
have a pork butt in your face. ♪
Hey! Where did he go?
We just wanted to celebrate
his manhood-ness.
I think manhood scared the pants off him.
Well, where y'all headed, stranger?
Home?
What a coincidence!
That's we are goin'.
Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud, he didn't care how. ♪
Cow! ♪
Chicken! ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
Oh, one-thousand-five-hundred-and-six.
One-thousand-five-hundred-and-seven.
Fifteen-thousand-seven-hundred-and-twelve.
Sixty-two.
What are you doin', Cow?
I am playing "Count The Snowflakes"!
Seventy-five-gazillion-and-nine.
Why did I ask?
You know, Mama?
Drivin' in the snow with you and the kids
brings out the man in me!
My turn to drive!
Oh, dear!
Look at that poor fat kid
in the middle of winter with no pants!
Maybe he's European!
Where you headed, stranger?
Home?
What a coincidence!
That's just where we're going!
You can ride with us.
Hop in!
You know, Dad?
That Red Kid fits right in.
He's like the big, fat,
red son we never had.
I'd like some more Pork Flakes, Dad!
You appetite is so much
better than those other two kids.
The Chicken and the Cow.
Thanks loads, Dad.
Mom and Dad,
when is he gonna go home?
He is home!
What are ya? Jealous?
Quick, Mom! Would you look at this?
Our heavyset Red Kid's mowing the snow!
I could count the times
Cow and Chicken did that on one foot!
I have a feeling that this son
will make us proud, Mama.
Oh, it's you, son!
Why look, Mom.
Our Red Son brought us the newspaper.
That's a good boy!
You're the best son ever!
And then the three little bacon steaks
were put in the oven,
and baked at three-fifty,
smothered in chocolate.
The end.
Oh, that was beautiful!
Read me another story.
Cow never reads to me
from the Cook Book from anymore.
Oh, anything for you, Mom.
It's time for "The Manure The Bear Show."
Oh, goodie! Oh, my favorite show!
Hey! Down in front!
How do you expect
your new brother to see
what he's changing channels to?
"The Moon Channel"?
It's my favorite.
We gave you the top bunk
'cause you're tops in our hearts, son.
You're too kind!
I don't think I like this, Chicken.
Yeah. Me, neither.
He's stealin' Mom and Dad's
infections from us.
Sleeping like a rock already!
Shaving already?
How old are you, Son?
Eleven.
Aren't ya kinda big for eleven?
I'm big boned!
Big feet and big noses run in my family.
That's the bus!
Hurry, Son, or you're gonna be late!
Have a nice day at school, Son!
Bye, you other two guys.
Golly, we're going to have so much fun,
Brother and Sister!
What's so funny, you little
All right!
Who beaned me in the mellon?
Cow?
Chicken?
Extra homework for both of you
knuckleheads!
Hey, small sickly kid! I'll play ya.
Oh, the pain. Mother.
Oh, I think that big boned red boy
is really a big, fat, bad man.
Oh, that's it, Cow! He's not a boy at all!
He's a grown man!
And we gotta prove it to Mom and Dad!
We are so proud of you! All "F's"!
I just bet them "F's"
stand for "fat" and "fantastic"!
You know, Cow and Chicken
never got straight "F's"!
This is the second happiest day of my life.
What's the first happiest day, Dad?
Why, the day you came into our lives, Son.
Full Moon Club.
The Pantyhose of the Month Card.
Bingo!
Mom and Dad!
This pantsless kid has a driver's license!
A driver's license?
You mean he's a man?
Well, I
You know what this means, Dad?
You wait right here, Red.
You is in big trouble, pal!
They are on to yous!
Your scam has been revealed!
I can't take it!
Nothing is worth this agony!
I'm a fraud! No one likes me!
I'll never ride on the float at the Prom!
It's manhood time, ♪
throw out your pretty lace. ♪
It's manhood time, ♪
have a pork butt in your face. ♪
Hey! Where did he go?
We just wanted to celebrate
his manhood-ness.
I think manhood scared the pants off him.
Well, where y'all headed, stranger?
Home?
What a coincidence!
That's we are goin'.