Dead to Me (2019) s03e03 Episode Script

1
["SEASONS IN THE SUN"
BY TERRY JACKS PLAYING]
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend ♪
We've known each other ♪
Since we were nine or ten ♪
Together we've climbed
hills and trees ♪
Learned of love and ABCs ♪
Skinned our hearts ♪
And skinned our knees ♪
Goodbye, my friend,
it's hard to die ♪
Is this happening inside my brain?
I mean, you can hear that, right?
Oh, yeah, I can hear it.
Like, jeez, what sadist
put this playlist together?
Right? It's not the most
comforting before a CT scan.
[JUDY SIGHS]
Has Ben called back?
Oh, I-I didn't leave him a message.
- What? Why?
- What was I supposed to say to him?
"I'm sorry my son
sweetly gave you the bird
that I used to kill your brother"?
Hmm. It was sweet of him.
I mean, if anybody has to have
the bird, at least it's Ben?
Well, rather nobody
have the bird, but
It's gonna be okay. We're
gonna get it back. I have faith.
- Well, that must be nice.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know what we should do?
- Hmm?
- We should visualize it. Yep.
- Oh, boy. Here we go.
- Here we go. I'm serious. Come here.
- [CHUCKLES]
I want you to feel it.
Okay, feel it for real. In
the palm of your hand, okay?
Feel the relief that you're gonna
feel when it comes back to you.
Hmm. You realize that
if everyone sat around
just hoping that shit would happen,
that, like, nothing would ever happen.
[BOTH] Hmm.
[RECEPTIONIST] Norman Benson?
No, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
We were here before that guy.
It's fine. I'm not in a rush.
[JUDY SIGHS]
It's hot, right? It's
like steamy in here.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- What?
Everything's gonna be okay.
All right? And if,
for some stupid reason,
it turns out to be something,
then you got it early.
- And that's good.
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yep.
- What?
- Nothing.
- Don't.
- I
Okay, remember when I thought
I was pregnant last year?
- Mm-hmm.
- I had an abnormal pap.
You never told me that.
I'm telling you now. They
told me I should follow up.
- And?
- I didn't.
What? Jesus, Judy!
You have to follow up.
That's why they call them follow-ups!
I'm following up now.
Yeah, that was over a year ago, Judy.
Well, I know, but I'm sorry.
- [SIGHS]
- I think I've had kind of a busy year.
- Doing what?
- Oh, I don't know.
Maybe helping you bury
my ex-fiancé's body
and then planning the vigil and
covering the whole fucking thing up.
So you're saying this
is this is my fault?
- What?
- I
Oh, my God, no.
I'm [SIGHS]
Look, we're in this together.
It's just the whole thing
kinda pulled focus from my
vaginal wellness.
- Vaginal? Why?
- [RECEPTIONIST] Deborah Simpson?
- Hmm? Oh! Did you say Judy Hale?
- [RECEPTIONIST] Uh, no.
Yeah, you know why? We've
been here for over 45 minutes,
and I think that my friend
might have been skipped over.
- [JUDY] Jen, it's fine.
- No, it's not fine!
You have waited long enough.
So, there must be some sort of mistake.
- There's no mistake, ma'am.
- Really?
[RECEPTIONIST] Hm.
You're "ma'am"-ing me? Did
you make this playlist, Susan?
- I did, actually. I
- [JEN] Mm-hmm.
- We'll wait. Thank you so much, Susan.
- [MOCKING] Thank you so much, Susan.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES]
- It's Perez.
- Sorry. No phone calls, ma'am.
[JEN GRUMBLES]
Shit, she needs to talk.
She says it's an emergency.
- Okay, let's go.
- [JEN] No, no!
- She said it's an emergency.
- [JEN] Jesus, Judy.
This is a fucking emergency, okay?
Now you please just take care of
you, and I will take care of this.
Benji, have you seen my glasses?
- You're holding them, Mom.
- [EILEEN] Oh, there they are.
[BEN] But, what, uh
Where do we keep the aspirin?
In the top drawer of the marble
vanity in the gold bathroom.
- How could I forget?
- [EILEEN] Hmm.
[EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[EXHALES]
[SIGHS]
Surprise, surprise. Now you think
you can drive, you fucking loser?
- You wanna know why I drink?
- Why?
Because every time I look in the
mirror, I see the person I hate most,
you fucking bully.
- Fine, go kill somebody. See if I care.
- [GRUNTS]
[HEARTBEAT THUMPING]
- What you hiding there?
- Huh? Oh.
[SPLUTTERS] It's my dad's
uh, old hunk of junk.
He didn't like looking at
it, so I was just covering it.
It's all rusted out. It's all rusted.
Rusted Root. [NERVOUS CHUCKLE]
- Remember that band Rusted Root?
- Nope.
It's a
They had a terrific rhythm section.
[CLICKS TONGUE] What
can I help with, officer?
You left this at The Sawmill
last night. Yeah. [CHUCKLES]
- Oh.
- I saw you knocking back a few at the bar.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. Thank you.
- It was broken when I found it.
- Yeah, no. I know. It was Yeah.
I just forgot where I put it. [CHUCKLES]
Thank you.
The way you stumbled out of the bar,
looked like you might not remember it.
Not that I'm judging.
Hey, no, judge away.
I've been in a shame spiral
all morning. [CHUCKLES]
[CLICKS TONGUE] My whole life,
uh, if I'm perfectly honest.
[SIGHS] Yeah, I'm familiar.
[EXHALES] I nearly drank
myself out of a job last year.
- Oh.
- Yeah. Just got my six-month chip.
- Oh, that's great. That's great.
- Thanks.
That's awesome. Yeah. No,
I've I've had one of those.
Three times. [CHUCKLES]
We go way AA back. Sorry.
- Trying that one out. Didn't really work.
- [CHUCKLES] No.
- Yeah, it was nice. It was it was
- Right. I get it. I get it.
Hey, uh, if you ever wanna
try more out. [CHUCKLES]
I don't know. Just if you wanna
go to a meeting or something.
You know where to find me.
Oh, I do now.
Thank you, Officer Prager.
- Nick.
- [CLEARS THROAT]
- Ben.
- Yeah.
Hey, um,
I'm really sorry about your brother.
Oh. Oh, thank you.
Yeah. Yeah, I re I really
wish I could help with the case,
but, uh, they got me on this, uh,
hit-and-run Judy Hale was involved in.
- Oh, are you? Oh, good.
- [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]
That's good. That's good.
- Uh, I mean, it's not good. It's terrible.
- Yeah.
It's an awful thing for somebody to
- The worst.
- You have any leads yet or
Not yet.
[INHALES] No car, no crime.
Right.
- Well, we'll get him. Or her. [CHUCKLES]
- Right.
- Yeah, anyway. Uh, yeah.
- Hey. [CHUCKLES]
- Take care of yourself.
- You too.
Do you remember when I said I
hate surprises? Well, surprise.
The FBI found this lodged
in Steve Wood's skull,
whatever the hell that is.
Um [CLICKS TONGUE]
it's a it's a bird's tail.
Bup-bup! Stop! Don't.
I don't wanna hear it.
The less I know, the better.
- What do you mean a bird's tail?
- It's from a wooden bird Judy had
[SPLUTTERS] Stop, stop! Stop.
Don't. I don't wanna hear anymore.
[HESITATES] I'm assuming you
got rid of the rest of it?
[SPLUTTERS] No, I do
not currently have it
in my possession. That is correct.
- I don't like how you just answered that.
- [JEN] Yeah.
[CHUCKLES] You know, it's a funny
story, but there are no jokes.
- Well, get it back and get rid of it now.
- Okay, I will. I will.
- You better. Okay, you better.
- I was I am! I am!
Because the FBI agent they've got
on this thing, Moranis, he's good.
[SCOFFS] He won the Meritorious
Medal of Honor last year.
The Merit Meritori
- Am I supposed to know what
- He's the MVP of the FBI.
Better believe he's gonna
get to the bottom of this.
Okay, maybe just don't
wave it around like that.
But I mean, out of context,
I mean, seriously, who's gonna
guess what that is, you know?
- Was that car here before? That sedan?
- Why, do you think someone's following us?
- Do you think we're being followed?
- I don't know. I don't know.
That's that's a lot of Tums.
Well, I'm riddled with
ulcers, thanks to you.
It takes a little while for
ulcers to form over time.
- I'm sorry that you're going through that.
- No. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I let myself
get dragged into your mess.
I always thought Judy Hale was
the riptide. You are the riptide.
You know, okay, I'm
I'm gonna take care of it.
All right? I promise.
You just just visualize that
I'm saying to you that it's gone.
- What?
- I I don't know. It's stupid, okay?
Just can I have one of those, please?
- [TUMS RATTLE]
- Thank you.
You know you're not fooling
anyone with that hat.
- Just like your hair is
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
- I'm just saying.
- [HUFFS]
If you had put it back in a scrunchie
[JUDY] Shit.
[EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[TECHNICIAN] Judy Hale?
[MACHINE WHIRRING]
[TECHNICIAN] All right, just
hold tight. Almost finished.
[TECHNICIAN] Okay. All done.
- That's it?
- Yeah.
- I can Can I sit up?
- Yeah, you can sit up.
- [JUDY SIGHS]
- All right. All set.
I love your necklace.
Is that an evil eye?
It is. It's supposed to
ward off anything bad.
Ah, yeah. This girl could
use some warding off.
[CHUCKLES] Yeah. Can't hurt, right?
Did that evil eye see
anything, um, good in there?
Sorry. You know I
can't tell you anything.
It's worth a shot.
The doctor will call with
results by end of the day.
Oh, is that, like, the end of the
business day or, like, the lunar day?
I know it's hard to wait.
[INHALES] They sell these at that
little jewelry store downstairs.
- If you want one.
- Oh.
- Thanks for the info.
- [CHUCKLES]
[EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING]
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
- Hey.
- Hey, how'd it go? You get the results?
[SIGHS] I have to wait
until the end of the day.
Oh, Jesus.
I know. How'd it go with Perez?
Uh, well, she has ulcers,
and, uh, she thinks
someone's following her.
- Why would someone be following her?
- Nobody's following her.
But the bigger headline
is that they may have found
a little piece of bird in Steve's head.
Oh, God.
And evidently, the FBI has a genius
named Moron who's gonna figure it out.
- Moranis?
- Yeah, but why do you know that?
Remember when I told you I
was cooperating with the FBI?
It was about the Greeks and the
laundering of the money and Steve?
No, no. Yes, of course I do.
Okay. Well, that's who I was talking
to. Glenn is a really nice guy.
Oh, Glenn's a nice guy.
He is. This is a good
thing. I'm telling you.
You know, your ability to be positive
in the shittiest of
times is truly a wonder.
Miracles happen every day.
Well, we could all use
a few of those right now.
- [IGNITION CLICKS]
- [ENGINE TURNS OVER]
[DOORBELL RINGS]
[EILEEN GRUNTS]
Oh, uh, hi, Eileen.
[EILEEN] Hello, Jen.
To what do I owe the pleasure?
Oh, well, I heard about Steve.
And I'm so sorry.
I'm truly, truly sorry.
Thank you, dear.
Um, I brought you ice cream.
It's, uh, rum raisin. Ben said
it's it's your favorite, right?
- Uh, is he here?
- Sorry. He he's out right now.
Oh, okay. Do you know
when he'll be back,
or if he went somewhere close by?
I don't know, but would
you like to come in?
You know what they say. It's bad
manners to eat ice cream alone.
Oh, do they say that?
You caught me in a lie, but I
could certainly use the company.
Okay.
- Make yourself at home.
- Okay.
- I'll grab the ice cream china.
- Oh, thanks.
[JEN SIGHS]
[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]
He jumped in front of our
car. He wanted to get hit.
[JEN GRUNTING]
- [JEN WHIMPERS]
- It's like he's here with us.
[GASPS] Jesus Christ.
Which one do you think Steven
would want to be buried in?
Oh, yeah, I-I don't think
I'm really the one to ask.
Hmm. It's so important
to pick the right one.
It's the last thing he'll ever wear.
Well, I'm sure whatever one you
pick will be perfect. [SHARP EXHALE]
I've been so worried about dressing him,
barely dressed myself.
Oh, no. No, this is a
really nice housecoat.
[CHUCKLES] Now I've caught you in a lie.
Look, I
After my husband died, I
I didn't get dressed for weeks,
and I-I couldn't shower,
and and it got, um, funky.
But at some point, I had to
pick myself up for my kids,
and you still have Ben, you know?
Of course, it's just I
I just can't help but
feel that it's my fault
that Steven's gone. I mean
Like, I
I could have done something,
uh, could have saved him.
I'm his mother. You understand?
Yeah. I do. I do, but
you you couldn't have.
Believe me.
Please, please don't blame
yourself. You don't deserve that.
Thank you, dear. You're so kind.
We better dig in
before it turns to soup.
I-I actually can't. I have to
go pick up my son from church.
I didn't realize you
were a woman of faith.
Oh, no, no. Definitely
not. [CHUCKLES]
I struggle too,
but turning to a higher power
is the only thing that seems
to really help when all else is lost.
Well, then I'm I'm
glad you have that.
I'm glad we both do.
[JEN] Hmm.
[MAN] Uh, coming.
Judy. It's been a minute.
Hey, Glenn.
It's good to see you again. Please.
- [JUDY] You look nice.
- Well, thank you.
Thanks so much for letting
me just come over like this.
- Of course. Uh, please have a seat.
- Thanks.
- Uh oh, uh, pistachio?
- No, I just ate.
- How are ya?
- [MURMURS]
How's your wife?
She's good, I hear.
Marcy and I separated.
[JUDY] Oh, no, I'm sorry.
It's all right.
I adopted a dog, so silver linings.
[CLEARS THROAT]
But what's going on? You
sounded worried on the phone.
I think someone might be following me.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I mean, maybe I'm just being paranoid.
- Maybe you should be.
- Why do you say that?
- Because you just said that.
- I did just say that. [INHALES]
I just think you should follow up on it.
You know, before it's too late.
All right.
- Well, what did this person look like?
- What person?
The person you're
paranoid is following you.
Oh, that person.
Um, I don't know.
- I didn't get a good look.
- Oh.
I don't know if you heard, but
my friend Jen and I, we
got into a hit-and-run.
- I hadn't.
- [JUDY] Yeah.
- When did this happen?
- Right after they found Steve.
And one of the cops thinks
that maybe it's all connected.
Like, whoever killed Steve
I'm so sorry about what happened to him.
That wasn't the outcome
any of us wanted.
I know.
- I blame myself, in a way.
- [JUDY] You do?
Not really. But we should've
kept a closer eye on him.
Oh, Glenn, if anyone's
to blame, it's me.
Why do you say that?
Because I'm the one that turned him in.
Well, you did the right thing.
I don't think the Greeks would agree.
- You think the Greeks killed Steve?
- [JUDY] I don't know.
Now that you say it out
loud, though, it sounds right.
Assuming it was Constantine's
guys, why would they come after you?
[JUDY] No idea.
I mean, Steve did steal millions
of dollars from them, but
- Did he?
- Yeah, didn't I tell you that?
- Did you?
- Didn't I?
Anyway, maybe they think I have it.
- Do you?
- Do I? [LAUGHS]
Oh, my God, can you imagine?
[BOTH LAUGHING]
I called every body
shop within 20 miles.
So nothing that matches the
damage to Hale and Harding's car.
Well, canvass the neighborhood again.
Is that Wood's autopsy
report? From the FBI?
Yes, it is. I offered to
liaise. To be the Laguna liaison.
- [NICK] Aww, cool.
- Okay.
- Oh, what the hell is that?
- [PEREZ] I don't know. Nobody knows.
It's a piece of wood, and
it was found in his head.
But, you know, out of context,
it can look like anything.
- [NICK] Wait.
- I don't know what
So, the killer wedged
wood into Wood's skull.
Hmm. Better light the Bat-Signal.
Looks like the Riddler's at it again.
Uh-huh.
'Cause the Riddler leaves
clever clues like
[SPLUTTERS] Yeah, I-I get it.
You know, that doesn't really
look like the Greeks' style.
- Maybe they changed their style.
- Or maybe it was somebody else.
Maybe.
- I mean, because Wood was kind of a prick.
- Big prick.
- You know, may he rest in peace.
- Mmm.
But you know, his brother
his brother seems like a
a really good dude. [SIGHS]
Poor guy. He's having a tough
time. I really feel for him.
Yeah, well, don't make it personal.
You're not his friend. You're
a cop. Just don't forget that.
I won't.
Hey, uh, you mind if I
take a look at that thing?
I no, I don't mind.
Why would I mind? Who would mind?
Why would that that's
not even a question.
Minding. I mean, good luck
making any sense of it.
[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]
No way.
[CLERK] I think I know exactly
what you're looking for.
Yes, this is it. Thank you.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
Just a minute.
Hi, Ben.
Hey, Jude.
[JUDY] Come on in.
It's so weird. I was
just thinking about you.
Oh, yeah? Oh, wow. I was
just thinking about you.
Oh, well, maybe we
manifested each other.
[HESITATES] Yeah, yeah.
[CHUCKLES] Um,
I had a question for you, uh,
about this.
[OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
Okay.
Henry said that you made it for him?
I did, yeah. That was me.
Well, I don't know what
happened to the tail.
Me neither.
Okay. Well, I wanna know
[OMINOUS MUSIC SWELLS]
Will will you help
me fix it? [CHUCKLES]
- Yes!
- Really?
Yes, of course I will. Wow. Yes.
I just want to bring
it back in one piece.
He was sweet to lend it to me.
It's so sweet of you to want to fix it.
Well, I wanna fix it,
but old meat paws here
can't do a craft to save his life,
so I'd really appreciate
the help if you have time.
No, I'm free all day. I
mean, well, the lunar day.
Ah! Awesome. Well, I-I bought
a whole bunch of new ones
for you to replace the tail with.
- That's a lot of birds.
- Right?
Hey, um,
how's, uh, how's Jen
doing since the accident?
Uh, she's you know,
it's a stressful time.
Sure. Sure. No, um
Like, I can't imagine.
All the stuff she's had to deal with.
It's like, how much can
one person handle, you know?
[BEN SIGHS]
["BROKEN WINGS" INSTRUMENTAL PLAYING]
[KIDS] Take these broken wings ♪
- And learn to pray again
- [CELL PHONE VIBRATES]
And learn to live so free ♪
When we hear ♪
The voices sing ♪
His book of love will open up ♪
And let us in ♪
Hey.
[KIDS] Take ♪
- I'm dying.
- What?
Alan thinks we rushed
things. He wants space.
[JEN] Oh.
[SIGHS] So he's getting
an apartment in Newport.
- I'm sorry, honey.
- And he took Adele.
[JEN] Oh.
Now I'm just rattling
around in that empty house,
like a gloomy but very in-shape ghost.
- [CONCERNED MURMUR]
- I've been wearing my knees out at night.
- Hmm?
- Praying that he'll change his mind.
Oh, I was thinking
something so different.
- Hey, Jen. [CHUCKLES]
- [JEN] Hmm.
Just wanted to sign you up
for Paper Cranes For Christ.
- What now?
- Jana, we're talking.
Uh, just asking all the Harmommies
to make a thousand origami cranes
for the Wing and a Prayer Fundraiser.
If I say yes, will you go away?
- Sure.
- Then yes.
- [JANA] Thanks.
- Gotta go.
- Go, go, go, go, go, go.
- [JANA] Okay.
- [CHRISTOPHER] Are you okay?
- [JEN] Hmm?
You realize you just signed
up to make 1,000 paper cranes?
[SIGHS] Yeah, well, I need all
the goodwill I can get right now.
- You're scaring me.
- Hmm?
No, it's just I just
got things going on.
Judy has some medical stuff.
What? Is she okay?
I hope so.
Well, I'm here if you
need anything. [SNIFFLES]
And so is God.
Gross.
[KIDS] so free ♪
When we hear ♪
The voices sing ♪
His book of love will open up ♪
- [SIGHS]
- And let us in, yeah [SONG FADES]
[EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING]
Jesus Christ, fine.
[SIGHS]
[VOICE BREAKING] Please let her be okay.
Please. [SNIFFLES]
Please let her get good news.
[GASPS] Oh, God, please.
[SOBBING] Please let her be okay.
[INHALES, SNIFFLES]
I can't. I can't. I can't.
- [BEN, IN HIGH VOICE] I'm cured.
- What? Oh, jeez.
- [BEN CHUCKLES]
- [SNIFFLES]
Hi. What
Henry was kind enough to
lend me this little guy,
and I thought I'd fix it for him.
[KIDS CONTINUE SINGING IN BACKGROUND]
I mean, Judy did most of the
work. Well, she did all the work.
- But the point is this bird is back.
- [GASPS]
Oh, great.
- Oh, my God, thank you. Thank you so much.
- No.
[SIGHS] You have no idea how
much this bird means to Henry.
- [BEN] Aww.
- And me.
- [SNIFFLES]
- [CHUCKLES] You're welcome.
Well, you're, uh, you're very sweet.
Are you kidding? You're the sweet one.
[SCOFFS] I heard you
came by the house today.
Yeah, I did.
Well, I have no idea what you
told my mom, but she showered.
So, thank you.
And if you can come by every
day and say the same thing,
- we'd all appreciate it.
- Okay.
[MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING]
- Holy Harmony's sounding tight.
- Yeah.
- You wanna get up there, don't you?
- Yeah. Hold me back.
Okay, I will actually hold you back.
- [CHUCKLES] Whoo!
- [JEN] Jesus.
[RINGING]
Hello?
Yes, this is she.
Hi.
Oh, no, no, no, please,
tell me now. [CHUCKLES]
It definitely is?
[EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING]
Uh-huh?
Yeah, I see.
Yeah, I understand.
No, don't you be sorry.
[SNIFFLES] I'm sorry that
you had to make this call.
Yeah, I will. Thank you.
You have a good night.
[EXHALES]
[JEN GRUNTS]
- Hey.
- [JEN] Hi.
All right, I don't know what kind of
visualization sorcery shit you did,
but thank you.
Told you. I had faith.
I'm sorry I was a dick earlier.
You weren't a dick.
- You had a lot on your mind.
- Yeah, but none of that matters.
You. You matter.
[SNIFFLES] I wouldn't be
able to live with myself
if something happened to you.
[SHUDDERS] And to think that I
was the reason that you got sick,
it's like I wouldn't [SOBBING]
I couldn't fucking forgive
myself, so [SNIFFLES]
I'm just sorry.
I'm so sorry.
Well, you don't have anything
to worry about 'cause I'm fine.
Wait.
- Did you get the results?
- Yeah, they just called.
[BLUBBERS] Oh! Oh, my God.
Thank God. Thank God.
Thank God. [SNIFFLES]
Way to bury the lede, girl. [CHUCKLES]
Oh, thank God. [SIGHS]
- I prayed for you.
- What?
Yeah, I did. [SNIFFLES]
Is it wrong that I'm a
little mad that it worked?
- No.
- [CHUCKLES]
- [SNIFFLING]
- Oh, I'm so glad you're okay.
- You know who's not gonna survive this?
- Who?
This little shit.
[JUDY] Well, he does
have it coming to him.
[JEN] Yeah.
["SEASONS IN THE SUN" PLAYING]
Goodbye, my friend, it's hard to die ♪
When all the birds ♪
Are singing in the sky ♪
Now that the spring is in the air ♪
Pretty girls are everywhere ♪
Think of me and I'll be there ♪
We had joy, we had fun ♪
We had seasons in the sun ♪
But the hills that we climbed ♪
Were just seasons out of time ♪
[MESSAGE SENT WHOOSH]
We had seasons in the sun ♪
But the wine and the song ♪
Like the seasons have all gone ♪
We had joy, we had fun ♪
We had seasons in the sun ♪
But the wine and the song ♪
Like the seasons have all gone ♪
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
[CAT MEOWS]