Kickin' It (2011) s03e03 Episode Script

I was up all night working on my project for the invention fair.
I have something truly amazing.
What do you guys have? We got nothing.
I am so excited.
We have a special guest Judge this year.
He's from Techtronic Labs and he is not too hard on this lonely lady's eyes.
Derek Tanner.
Hello, future.
I'm Derek.
I can't believe it.
That's my dad's new boss.
He's a genius.
And my personal hero.
This is the Mind Surfer.
You control wherever it goes with your thoughts.
And that's really what inventing is.
Dreaming things into reality.
You know, I tell them that every day.
But do they listen? No! Milton, dude, you gotta help us.
Here we go.
Once again, you've done nothing and you want credit by glomming onto my project.
Good.
So we're on the same page.
And this is Milton Krupnik.
He's the smartest boy in our class.
Ah, Milton.
If you're anything like your father, I'm sure your project will be most impressive.
'Kay.
Right now the only competition you have is something called the Butt Whistle.
Put it away, Eric! May I present May we present The Corn Coddlers.
Yes! The corn codl what now? Every Wednesday night, I have to give my Nana a foot massage.
Oh! An old lady under a tarp.
Already better than the Butt Whistle.
Between her bunions, calluses, and gnarled up corns, I'm dealing with some pretty tough feet.
These mechanized gloves give my hands the strength of 10 men.
Allowing me to do this.
Well, this is just embarrassing.
That I didn't think of such a fantastic invention! How did you manage to increase the strength of the human hand tenfold? - I used Greenblatt's law of inverse - Inverse To maximize its relative force - Force.
Power.
- Increasing its power.
It's simple, really.
Well, you three boys are going on a V.
I.
P.
tour of Techtronic Labs.
Because you are the winners! All right! Get over it, Eric.
You lost.
- Don't - Don't - You - You Get all tough with me! I'm saying - Won't - Won't - You - You Come kick it with me? And we could have a ball, run up the wall! - That's just how we do.
- Come on! And no matter how much I chop and punch it's not as cool as kickin' it with you.
Here we go, let's start the party! Chop it up like it's karate.
Everybody! - Don't - Don't - You - You Get all tough with me! I'm saying - Won't - Won't - You - You Come kick it with me? And we could have a ball, run up the wall! - That's just how we do.
- Come on! And no matter how much I chop and punch it's not as cool as kickin' it with you.
What are all these people doing? Oh, when a carnival comes to town, they usually try and drum up business with their sideshow attractions.
Ladies and gentlemen! Behold the beautiful, the mesmerizing Unicornia.
Are you kidding me? What kind of sucker would believe in "Unicornia"? Unicornia! I love you! She's even more beautiful than in her pictures.
Sam.
Sam.
Sam.
Let's go meet her.
Come on.
Hey guys, Mr.
Tanner called me and told me to bring in my Corn Coddlers.
Our Corn Coddlers.
Guys, this tour is a big deal to me.
Please don't do anything to embarrass me.
Come on, we're not gonna embarrass you.
We know how important this is for you.
I'm even gonna put on my new deodorant.
It's called "de-stank".
Oh, classy.
Dude, can I get some of that? Yeah yeah.
Welcome to Techtronic Labs.
This is Hans, an award winning physicist.
Last year he invented a geothermal earthquake detector that saved thousands of lives.
Oh, what's he working on now? Rubber snot.
Oh, finally.
Something the world needs.
We're very excited about this We've been contracted by a security company to invent an invisible guard dog.
- It's very exciting.
- I'm sorry? Dr.
Korachi is grooming King, a purebred German Shepherd.
Okay.
Yeah.
Oh no, sure he is.
There's a big doggy on that table.
Oh, hey, fella.
Oh, look at me.
I'm a little kitty cat.
- Meow.
- Please don't do that.
Want to get the kitty cat? Please don't Jack! Jack! He got the little kitty cat! I got you, man.
Come on, get up.
That was close.
I think he's gone.
Oh no, he's back.
Jack! Jack! Jack, he's got my leg! You're very different from those two.
Yes, very.
My guess is, when it came to your invention, you did all the work, hmm? Oh, no no.
I I wouldn't say that.
I think that we all they did nothing.
I know.
Only a genius could design those gloves.
And you, my friend, could be the next Derek Tanner.
- Would you excuse me for one second? - Oh, yes.
You were saying? Milton, be careful no one takes advantage of your brilliant mind.
What are you talking about? Well, your friends.
Jack and Jerry.
They appear to be nothing more than, well Parasites.
Hey, guys.
Bad news.
King just ran through the cloning machine.
Yeah.
This place is lame.
On that last ride, I got puke all over my shoes.
Yeah, sorry about that.
Little kiddie caterpillar train what a lot faster than it looked.
Look, can we just go home? I mean, this pla Wow! Ah.
You like the T-Rex, huh? Okay.
You know what? I'm gonna knock Abe's hat off and win it for you.
Please.
I'm a Sensei.
I can do this in one shot.
That's why they call me One shot.
You might need a few more balls, one shot.
And no matter how much I chop and punch it's not as cool as kickin' it with you! - Jerry.
- Sorry.
I guess Tanner's still showing Milton around.
Psst.
Psst.
Come here.
Dude, what are you doing? It's restricted.
We're on a V.
I.
P.
tour.
What do you think V.
I.
P.
stands for? "Visit it please".
No, dude! Don't go Whoa.
- Dude.
- Dude, check it out.
It's our gloves.
Looks like Tanner really amped them up.
Dude, look.
I think they're gonna be part of this crazy suit.
The stuff in this room looks different from the stuff they're developing out there.
I know.
These things look dangerous.
Yeah.
Hey, what do you think this does? Jerry, don't.
- Dude, are you okay? - What?! I can't hear you.
What are you two doing in here? This room is restricted.
That's what I told him, Sir.
There are things called boundaries, Jack.
- Huh?! - The tour's over.
You're leaving.
You know, the stuff in this room is dangerous.
You know, the stuff in this room is dangerous! You have no idea who you're messing with.
- These two are banned for life! - You're in a band with your wife? Right on, dude.
What kind of stuff do you play? Rudy, we've been here two hours.
You're out of money.
Let's go.
I am going to win you that dinosaur! Oh.
No no, I just remembered.
I have an emergency dollar taped to my chest.
Here.
No.
No no no no no.
I did it! This game is rigged.
I am taking what's mine! You people are gonna give carnies a bad name! Nice.
Again.
That was good.
Well, you know what? I hope you guys are happy.
You almost ruined the most important day of my life and embarrassed me in front of my new friend Derek Tanner.
There's something off about that guy.
He had this drawing of a weaponized suit, and our gloves were a part of it.
Our gloves? There's no "our".
Those are my gloves.
And you two are questioning a genius like Tanner? That's a laugh.
You know what? Tanner was right.
You guys are parasites.
Parasites? Oh, you did not just call us parasites! Us?! We're para What's a parasite? It's not good.
You hang out with that creep Tanner for one day, and you turn into a real jerk.
Really?! Well, that creep just hired this jerk.
- What?! - That's right.
Through Techtronic's work-study program, I can finish school while working there Surrounded by people who appreciate me! Oh, really? Well, what's to appreciate anyway? You're just a skinny brainiac who's gotten me through school, while guiding me through the pitfalls of puberty, and is one of the best friends a boy could ever have! Aw, Jack! What have you done, man? It used to be, when you're in the middle of a sweltering heat wave, there was nothing you could do.
But not anymore! Thanks to "The Blizzard-Brella".
Booya! That's my boy.
I've never said that before.
It's fun to say "booya".
It's like a Like a party in your mouth.
Booya, booya! You know, Milton, I've got very big plans for you.
Bigger than snowing umbrellas? Oh, yes.
This is where the real science happens.
Why don't you, uh, try on your gloves? I made a few minor adjustments.
And now they're as strong as 100 men.
Why don't you try to bend that manhole cover? Manhole cover? That's impossible.
Whoa! There things are, like, powerful.
Your Nana's feet must be really jacked up.
My Nana's feet are beautiful! These aren't really for Nanas.
They're for a very select customer.
One that's willing to spend a lot of money.
But what if those customers turn out to be bad people? Oh.
Oh, they are bad people.
That's how you make the most money.
By selling illegal weapons to bad people.
Look, Milton.
I chose you because you remind me of a younger me.
Together, nothing could stop us.
I am nothing like you! And I don't want to create things that hurt people.
You know what? You're not getting any more of my ideas.
I quit.
I understand.
But, uh, you know, it would be a shame if something bad were to happen to your father.
I mean, labs are very dangerous places.
And accidents happen all the time.
Oh, I wouldn't worry about that.
Krupnik men are very safe.
Our family motto is "Slow down, you".
No.
I'm talking about a very different kind of accident.
Oh.
Like not wearing safety goggles when you work with bromium sulfate? No.
I Forgetting your insulation tongs when you work with dry ice? No! I Accidentally mixing together magnesium chlo I'm going to hurt your father! Wow, I wasn't even in the ballpark.
Look, Rudy, why don't we just go home? You're not going home until you get a magical memory.
I am getting you that T-Rex.
I just have to figure out a way to get back in here.
Why don't you just put on a costume and sneak through the performers' entrance? I got it! Why don't I just put on a costume and sneak through the performers' entrance? Yeah, that might work.
What are you doing here? Certainly not being banned for life, that's for sure.
Showtime, let's go.
Wha? But Ladies and gentlemen! Here he is, the international legend Iron gut! The only human on the planet who can catch a cannonball with his stomach! Whoa-ho-ho! I gotta see this.
Blow a hole through his belly! Oh, no.
Woo! Let's go.
That was good.
Now again.
That's good.
Hey, guys.
Seriously? Again? Milton.
Surprised you came back to hang out with the parasites.
I'm not staying.
I just came to clear out my locker.
So you're really not coming back anymore? I couldn't if I wanted to.
Mr.
Tanner forbid it.
I don't wanna talk about it.
Something's wrong.
His sparkle's gone.
Dude, you can tell us what's wrong.
Man, we always have your back.
Whatever it is.
Anything you need, no matter what.
We will be there for you, bro.
Tanner is forcing me to make evil and dangerous weapons.
If I don't, something terrible is gonna happen to my dad.
Well, Tanner sounds crazy.
Good luck with that.
Iron gut, iron gut! - You gotta do it again.
They love you.
- No way.
I am breathing through a hole in my ribs.
My stomach is halfway up my nose.
And I think one of my kidneys is in the tilt-a-whirl.
Come on, name you price.
There's gotta be something you want.
No no, there is absolutely nothing that Wait.
Maybe there is one thing.
I did it once.
I can do it Oh, mama! That thing's bigger than a house.
See you, Rudy.
Tanner said everything in that room is illegal.
Great, so we just need to grab the gloves, take them to the police.
And that should be enough to put Tanner in jail.
Perfect.
Let's go.
The gloves they're gone! He must have known we were coming.
- We gotta get out of here.
- Go go.
Hello, boys.
Looking for these? Guys, I found the gloves.
Too bad, Milton.
Together we could have done amazing things.
I wouldn't do anything with you.
You're a monster! We're going to the authorities and telling them everything.
No, you're not.
You think I'm afraid of you and some amped-up Corn Coddlers? I got this.
Ah! Funny, Milton, you're about to be destroyed by your own hand.
Our hand! Uh No! You destroyed the gloves that cost me a million dollars! And you dented my pinky ring! You were right about one thing.
Labs can be very dangerous.
I'm sorry I got so carried away.
I forgot who I was.
I wanted so badly to be the next Derek Tanner.
Ah, it's all good, man.
We're just glad to have the old Milton Krupnik back.
I always thought there was something off with Tanner.
Milton, I'm really proud of you for standing up to him.
That showed guts.
The only reason I had the guts was because Jack and Jerry had my back.
I have plenty of time to become a great inventor.
Now's the time to be with my friends.
Hey, uh, where's Jerry? Oh, he went to get his hat in the cloning room.
All right, guys.
I'm ready to go.
How about we stop and get some pizza? - I'll pay.
- I'd like that.
All right, guys.
Ready to go.
- Didn't he just - All right, guys.
Ready to go.
I'm only paying for one Jerry.
Kickin' in it with you! The carnival's amazing, Rudy.
I can't wait to come back next year.
Find someone else.
I am never coming back here.
Hey.
Save your money, little girl.
It's a complete scam.
Winner! So she got lucky once, big deal.
And she wins again.
- No.
- And again! - No.
- And again! - No.
- And again! Faster Sam, get me out of here.
The lady can't loose!