Lethal Weapon (2016) s03e03 Episode Script

1 (WHISTLES) MAN: Larry.
I'm having a ball What am I looking at? That's a fork, Mr.
Cusumano.
No, it's crusted marinara.
Now get your head out of your ass, Larry, and go rewash all the flatware.
Nah.
I'm not in the mood.
Excuse me? You want to say that again? I don't feel like it.
I quit.
Really? Well, who the hell's gonna give you another job? I don't need it.
I've got this.
I'm havin' a ball (LAUGHS) Well, excuse me, Mr.
Rockefeller.
I didn't realize you were playing the lottery.
But what happens if you miraculously don't win? Oh, I'm gonna win.
I've got a hunch.
Excuse me.
I'm just A hunch, he says.
Yeah.
I got a feeling today's gonna be my lucky day.
(LAUGHS) I'm having a ball.
- (WHISTLES A TUNE) - MAN: Larry! I've been losing sleep ROGER JR.
: Did Riana make this? - Mm-hmm.
- (CHUCKLES) Looks like someone was feeling guilty about missing that big 30 shindig, huh? Or she loves her dad.
And wants to contribute something.
I'm contributing my presence.
(SCOFFS) Also, I'm working on a roast.
Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
Besides, what is there to roast? Hey, RJ, can you give us the room, please? ROGER JR.
: Sure.
I'm gonna go work on that roast.
- So, um - Hey.
- We have a situation.
- I know.
The boy wants to mock me publicly tomorrow.
No, a different situation.
My dad called.
And he is coming to L.
A.
- for a few days.
- When? Well, he is coming today.
- Today?! - Listen, I didn't want to tell you because I did not want to ruin your week.
You invited him to my 30th? He invited himself.
And, honey, he just wants to be supportive.
He is rearranging a lot of things to be here.
Yeah, I know, and I'm sure he'll tell us all about them.
Lunch with the Bidens, SoulCycle class with Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Honey, listen, he is my dad, okay? Can you please try not to get the way you get around him.
- How I get with him? - The way you get.
He's always trying to show me up.
Our wedding.
- That was a beautiful toast.
- During our vows.
Who interrupts the groom to give a toast? - He always tries to steal my thunder.
- Really? - And you know he does.
- Roger.
He doesn't need to steal your thunder - because he was a federal judge.
- Federal judge.
I know.
I can't forget.
You know why? Because he won't let me.
(DOORBELL RINGS) - That's him.
- (SIGHS) I bet you five dollars he leads off with a hair joke.
My favorite son-in-law.
(LAUGHS) Hair still hasn't grown back, I see.
(LAUGHS) Patricia Jane.
Radiant as ever.
And five dollars poorer.
Daddy, we are so happy that you're here - to celebrate with us.
- Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss it.
30 years in the same place, that's quite an achievement.
- (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) - I'm just happy I was able to fit it in with my book tour.
Oh, the big book tour.
- Roger, have I got a treat for you.
- Really? I wrote down a few thoughts on the plane.
And it would be my pleasure to present your little plaque to you tomorrow.
Yeah, well, you know what? That's Such a generous offer, Daddy.
- Wh Right? - Such a gener But, however, we, uh, unfortunately, just, uh, locked in a presenter.
Yep.
Uh, bad timing.
Mm.
Mm-hmm.
Who'd you line up? It's (LAUGHS) It's not finalized yet, and you know I'm supposed to be kind of hush-hush about it, - but, um, it's the mayor.
- Mm-hmm.
Oh.
Right.
The mayor.
- (MOUTHING) - Well, in that case, objection overruled, as I've been known to say.
(LAUGHING): Because you're a federal judge.
(KNOCKING) Natalie.
Can I? Yes, please.
Come in.
So, what do you think? It's not so bad, right? Yeah.
Uh, I know I'm a few minutes early, but Andrew wanted to beat the traffic.
Andy the proctologist? Anesthesiologist.
Right.
Right.
The guy who puts everyone to sleep.
So how's Maya? Is she, uh, excited about her first night in the motel? Um, yeah.
Sort of.
Look, it's not you.
She just has trouble sleeping in unfamiliar places.
Yeah, I know.
That's why I got her the same sheets from her bed at home.
(LAUGHS) My Little Pony? Cole, she hasn't had these sheets in years.
Yeah.
Why would she? That's so silly.
- Yeah.
- They're comfy, though.
So, Maddie's mom is dropping her at your office after school.
These are her PJs, inhaler and allergy meds.
Look, Ojai is just a couple of hours away, so if anything happens Nothing's gonna happen.
I got this.
Okay.
You know, if something's going on with you, or you're not ready She's my daughter, okay? I can handle one night.
You go and party your ass off with Andy, the proctologist.
Anesthesiologist.
Proctologist.
Anesthesiologist.
Proctologist.
(WHISTLING A TUNE) Morning, Roger.
We got a gunshot victim.
- Single bullet to the chest.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What are you doing? Telling you about the case.
Yeah, but you don't just dive in.
We got to banter a little.
You know, grease the wheel, prime the pump.
Share some things on your mind.
Is he for real? Unfortunately.
Oh, here's something.
I just found out that my father-in-law is staying with us.
Well, that's funny, my daughter's staying with me.
No, no.
You don't change topics mid-banter.
You have to wait for the lull.
Bailey, help me out here.
You do have to wait for the lull.
Wow.
So many rules.
Okay, you know what? Let's just dive in.
Bailey, what do we got? All right, our victim is Larry Mandel.
Worked at a restaurant around the corner.
This morning, out of the blue, he decides to quit.
Walks out and employees hear a gunshot.
As if someone's waiting for him.
Sobriety medallion.
BAILEY: Sober living and halfway houses give those out.
Cole, I know that you think banter is just idle chatter, but it's not.
It's communing, listening, - creating a rapport.
- Hey, look at that, Roger today's lottery drawing.
He doesn't get the concept of the lull.
Next two numbers are 40 and 47.
How the hell did you do that? Looks like Larry's number came up.
He had the winning numbers written on his arm.
Killer must've grabbed the ticket.
So the theory is somebody rigged the lottery.
Or there's a special sharpie out there that can predict the future.
Magic sharpie theory.
Well, let's start digging.
Is there something else? Actually, yeah.
(CLEARS THROAT) - Okay, you know how tomorrow is my 30th? - Mm.
Who's presenting the plaque? No one.
The plaque's just kind of there.
Okay, good.
Because you're friends with the mayor, right? Roger.
No offense, but if I'm gonna call in a favor to the mayor, it's not gonna be to present you with a plaque.
What's going on? Trish's dad is in town.
The judge is here? I love him.
Former judge.
Not a judge anymore.
Problem solved; have Don do it.
I still get misty when I think about his toast at your wedding.
"Love is like a painting that's never finished.
" That toast is the exact reason why Don can't speak at my ceremony.
He's a shameless spotlight thief - whose mission in life Wh - Oh, come on.
Is to make me look this small in front of Trish.
Roger, with family, generosity of spirit is our most valuable resource.
Do you know where I heard that? If you say Don's toast, I might have to shoot you.
I'll make some calls.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
It was Don's toast.
We call this the bullpen.
It's cool, right? And this is Daddy's desk.
And this is my mug.
(LAUGHS) Yeah, I've seen a mug before.
Okay.
So, uh How about I, uh, take you for a tour in the precinct? I just want to do my homework.
Oh, studious.
I like it.
What subject? Why do you care? Well, because I'm your dad and dads care about these things.
I don't know.
Math.
Well, is it math or not? Yeah.
Why didn't you just say math? I don't know.
Should we start over? Did I do something wrong here? 'Cause the last time you spent the night, it was so fun.
Dad.
I was nine.
That was a long time ago.
BAILEY: Hey, Cole, I've got something.
Rocco Ricci.
Lived in a halfway house with our dead dishwasher.
And he won the lottery six months ago.
Can't be a coincidence.
Murtaugh wants to pick him up now.
Already? Maya just got here.
I don't need a babysitter, Dad.
I'm 12.
Okay, I know, but I just don't want anything to happen to you.
I'm in a police station.
Literally the safest place I could be.
Okay, well, you have my cell, right? I'm gonna be back soon.
And I just want to say that, Maya, having you here, it is great.
It's a nightmare.
Put me in a room with a guerilla insurgent and I can break him, no problem.
Can't crack my 12-year-old daughter.
Well, see, that's your first mistake.
You underestimate the enemy.
12's tough.
Not quite an adult, hate to be treated like a kid.
(EXHALES) I'm drowning, man.
What do I do? There's nothing you can do.
She's gonna hate you till she's 16.
And then she'll need money.
No, I'm not giving up yet.
All I need is a little luck.
Ha.
Good luck with luck.
There's no such thing as luck.
Life is just a slew of random, meaningless events, one after the other, interrupted by Don.
Great pep talk, Roger.
So Bailey says this Rocco guy lived with Larry in a halfway house six months ago, then he wins the lottery and moves here.
- Must've cost a fortune.
- Not surprised.
Statistically, most lottery winners end up broke within five years.
Aren't you a ray of sunshine.
It's true.
(GLASS BREAKING) (MAN GROANING) (CLATTERING) (GRUNTING, CLATTERING CONTINUES) LAPD! Drop him! Now! (GUNSHOTS) (GRUNTING) I got him! Get the little guy.
(ELEVATOR CHIMES) (BOTH GRUNTING) (GROANS) (ELEVATOR CHIMES) - (GUN COCKS) - Drop it, or he dies.
Hey, don't shoot, man.
I'm getting a plaque tomorrow.
(SHOUTS) (GRUNTS) (COLE GASPS) Oh, man! And you don't believe in luck? Any luck IDing the body? I sent the photos to gang unit so they can decode these tats.
- Nothing yet.
- Oh, they're Eastside AP.
Says it on his arm.
You speak Armenian? No.
I can read it a little bit.
Whoa, who are they? Maya, what are you doing? You shouldn't be in here.
- Get out.
Now.
- (SIGHS) I just want to see.
How'd he die? Out now.
Okay? Or you're gonna be in big trouble.
No.
I didn't do anything.
That's it.
You're going back to the motel.
I'm punishing you.
What does that mean? Well, it means - Bailey? - Uh, don't drag me into this.
Okay, fine.
You know what? You're going straight to bed.
It's 4:00.
What about dinner? Well, then dinner first, and then no dessert.
- I never have dessert.
- Then no TV.
No phone.
And then you're gonna eat - all your vegetables.
- Fine.
You know, you suck at this dad thing.
MURTAUGH: So, Rocco, - who were those guys? - No idea.
But all I can say is 300 pounds of human drops out of the sky and lands on the dude you and me, luckiest guys on Earth.
Don't forget you were strangled this morning.
Sure.
But still, I won the lottery.
That's not luck.
You cheated.
I didn't cheat.
A stranger came up to me in AA, told me he could give me numbers, guaranteed winners.
Said all I have to do is split the jackpot.
This stranger did he give you a name? Nope.
Called himself my guardian angel.
(BOTH CHUCKLE) MURTAUGH: No.
No, this is not happening.
No, I got - I got plenty of time for this.
- MURTAUGH: Don.
- Don, what are you doing here? - I had a meeting downtown with my publisher, so I thought I'd pop in.
You didn't tell me that the judge was a published author.
- Former judge.
- It's a lifetime honorific.
You know, like "general" or-or "president.
" California Penal Code, Pocket Edition.
Edited by the Honorable Donald Bennett.
Oh.
So more editor than an author.
Well, I wrote the foreword, but Elena Kagan, uh, I think she called it groundbreaking.
(WHISPERS): "Groundbreaking.
" - (CHUCKLES) - Yeah, listen, Don, we're glad you dropped by, but we're in the middle of taking a witness statement.
Yeah, I know.
Brooks told me that you're, uh, looking into lottery rigging? Yeah.
May I make a suggestion? - Not right - Please, yeah.
Follow the money.
Little phrase I coined during the days when I was on the criminal court bench.
- Follow the money? - Follow the money.
- It-It means looking into - I-I know what it means.
It is the bedrock of criminal investigation.
Everybody says it.
After I coined it.
I did not know that.
- That is awesome.
- (CHUCKLES) COLE: Silent treatment, huh? Okay.
I lasted a week in a sleep deprivation box in Caracas, so this is nothing.
Okay, fine, you're unpunished.
But you have to talk to me.
Still? Man, you could teach classes at Langley.
(PHONE CHIMES) Texting and driving.
Great example.
I wasn't.
I was gonna ask you to read it for me.
- Do you mind? - Whatever.
It's from Murtaugh.
He says he's got a lead at the Frabble Shack.
What's the Frabble Shack? You don't know? They have, like, the best milkshakes in L.
A.
Can I come? Maya, it's an investigation.
- Please? - Wait, hold on, you actually want to spend time with me? I want a Frabble.
I'll take it.
- Stay in the car, okay? - Okay.
What flavor do you want? You decide.
Hey, Dad.
Thanks.
For some This is all a game Excuse me.
Hi.
Welcome to Frabble Shack.
Looks like a good kid.
How old is he? He's eight.
Tell him not to get any older.
I do, but he just won't listen.
What can I get you? I would like two Strawberry Frabbles.
Biggest you got.
MURTAUGH: Why don't you make it three.
Did I just see your daughter in a car on an investigation? It's fine.
The morgue was way worse.
So, we got a lead, or you just craving dairy? This is where Rocco would come meet his, uh, guardian angel.
And the victim's credit card was charged here last week.
WOMAN: Victim? Did something happen? Have you seen either of these two men - in here before? - Uh I think so.
Yeah, they-they were meeting one of our regulars.
Guy's in here almost every day.
Mateo.
He's right over there.
COLE: Mateo.
LAPD.
We have a few questions.
Stay in the car.
I got you strawberry.
Hey, that could be evidence.
One of us should go down there and get it before it gets run over.
Good call.
Thanks, Roger.
No, I don't Okay.
Mateo.
(SCREAMS, PANTING) Come on down, buddy.
You don't need to do this.
No, this is what I deserve.
No, whatever you did, we can talk about this, okay? - Hey, that's close enough! Come on! - Okay.
Okay, I'm stopping.
(HORNS HONKING) Just tell me what happened.
Is this about Larry? I didn't kill him.
But it's all my fault.
Look, I work for the lottery, and I tried to make up for what I did, but it just made everything worse.
Make up for what? Come on, just talk to me, all right? 30 years on the force, and it ends like this? (HORNS HONKING) What did you do? I promise you, I'll understand.
I killed someone.
I was drunk.
I shouldn't have been driving.
And I've been I've been c-carrying that for years! Do you even know what that's like? Yes, I do.
I do.
Okay? I've killed people, too.
Too many to count.
Not all them deserved it.
Because of me, a nine-year-old boy is dead.
I have to live with that every day of my life.
But I live with it.
And so can you.
MAYA: Dad? Maya.
(HORNS HONKING) - (TIRES SCREECHING) - MAN: What's wrong with you?! (HONKING) What are you doing here? Maya! (HONKING) Holy crap.
Hey, Cole, did you see that? What are the odds? COLE: Maya! After the accident, I, uh changed my name, and I got clean.
I got a job working IT for the Lottery Commission and decided I needed to make amends, so I saw a-a loophole in the lottery code, and I started finding people who were down on their luck and giving them winning numbers.
Wow.
You're like a real-life Robin Hood.
Except he didn't keep half.
Rocco said you split the winnings.
- Not with me.
- Really? Then with who? MATEO: Um Mateo's alibi checks out.
But he was working with someone.
Might be our killer.
How's Maya? I don't know.
She was just staring out the window the whole way back.
Oh, kids are resilient.
I once lost RJ at the zoo.
I found him three hours later doing laps in the otter tank.
They bounce back, although that smell - never went away.
- (DOOR OPENS) No need for the applause.
What happened? I just got Mateo to give up his partner.
- Were you guys even listening? - I didn't hear.
I didn't even know you were in the room.
- Okay, I need to work with more women.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
You gonna tell us or not? Who was Mateo working with? (GUN COCKS) Rowdy Rodney, Mr.
Lottery Commissioner.
Where you going, pal? Me? Just headed to the gym.
Ugh.
What a relief.
See, Levon here was thinking that you were skipping town with the money you owe us.
You do have our money, don't you, buddy? I had it.
I did, but someone hacked the account.
The money is gone.
Gone? Is that a joke? 'Cause Serj isn't laughing.
Serj laughs at everything.
Give me time.
I can get it back.
You know, first the loudmouth dishwasher, and now this.
Got to tell you, Rodney, don't think you're worth it.
Please.
I'll get the money.
I will.
(LAUGHS) You see that, Rodney? The man loves comedy.
Find the money, Rodney.
Next time, no one's laughing.
Didn't know what kind of pizza you like, so I got you four different kinds.
I can get you more, though.
I just want to go to bed.
It's our only night together.
I thought we could hang, maybe watch pay-per-view.
You want to hang out? Fine.
Let's talk.
I want to know about the people you killed.
Maya, sometimes adults have to say things that are not true.
So you were lying? Dad, you worked in the CIA.
I know you're not perfect.
Maya, can we just drop it? That kid, the one who died what was his name? (GASPING) Hey, how about a night swim? I'll bet your mom never lets you do that.
You're ignoring me.
Very mature.
- I'm not ignoring you.
- Then talk to me.
I am.
I will.
I just I I have to go to the bathroom.
(DOOR CLOSES) Dad? Come on.
You can't hide in there forever.
I just want to know what happened.
WOMAN: Get up! Get up now! WOMAN: He's gone.
You got to let go.
Fine.
Guess I'll just keep making it up in my head.
His name was Hanni.
I called him Velcro.
He, uh He used to follow me everywhere.
Never let me get away with anything.
Lot like you.
How'd he die? Dad? He was shot.
I didn't see him there, but he was there because of me.
Have you ever killed anyone on purpose? I have.
It was part of the job.
I never hurt anyone unless I had to.
To protect people.
Do you understand? I think so.
You're one of the good guys, right? I try to be, Maya.
I really try.
Any more questions? Yeah.
We still going for a night swim? - (TRISH LAUGHING) - Hey, hope nobody's hungry.
(MUSIC PLAYING) I see no one's hungry.
Baby, I didn't know you were coming for dinner.
Dad said he saw you at work, and you were working - through dinner.
- DON: Well, I just assumed you'd be running down leads after I pointed you in the right direction - on your, uh - After you did what now? Yeah, Pop-Pop's just telling us how he helped you.
Judge, jury and executioner.
- (LAUGHTER) - Yeah, baby, sit down.
We'll get a plate.
DON: Yeah, plenty of food.
Grab a seat, Roger.
Actually, that's my seat right there.
You know what? I want to take you guys out to dinner tomorrow after the ceremony.
I talked to Wolfgang, and, uh, he said we could have the back room.
Is the mayor going to be joining us? I don't know.
- The mayor's coming to your shindig? - It's pending.
Don't tell me he's canceling at the last minute.
I mean, that's not right.
He's a friend of mine.
Let me give him a call.
- Dad, Daddy.
- No, don't, don't, don't.
Don't.
Don't.
It's okay.
You only have one 30th.
That's disrespectful.
- I got to call.
- Hey, look, look.
Hey, ah, okay, the mayor's not coming.
You happy? He never was coming.
Why do you always do this? What is your thing, man? What? What do I do? - Okay.
- You show up, and you show me up.
That's what you do all the time.
You're doing it right now.
- TRISH: Let's - You are sitting in my chair, you know it's my chair.
However, you remain seated in my chair.
Roger, it is not a big deal.
Don, do I come to your house, and sit on your throne? - Hmm? - I'm a guest.
Are you actually saying you want me to move? - Yes! - No, he's not saying that.
He understands.
Would it kill you to give me just one thing, man? One thing! Oh, no, it's too cold.
Oh, you think that's cold? You should try - freediving in the Arctic.
- You've done that? No.
But I'm just saying you should try it.
Maybe we should go back inside.
What? No way.
A Cole never backs down from a challenge, okay? Come on.
It'll be fun.
Come on, Maya.
You can do this.
I know you can.
Ready? One two three.
All right! Nice dive.
(WATER GURGLING) (SIGHS, GROANS SOFTLY) Dad? Okay, you know what else sounds fun? The emergency room.
Okay, breakfast time.
You got a choice of nougat, caramel, gummy for me.
This is my breakfast.
Every day.
Maya is gonna be having muesli and prunes.
Gross.
Cole, can I talk to you for a second? Sure.
Okay, listen, I know I screwed up, all right? But to be fair, I think that the "No Diving" signs at the motel are not up to code.
Six stitches, Cole, in her head.
And that's not even the worst part.
She told me what happened.
She told you? Of course.
She's 12.
I think she's still working through it.
(SIGHS) That's why I wanted to come clean, you know? I wanted to tell her about the kid and how he died.
Wait.
What kid? What are you talking about? Wait, what are you talking about? She told me she accidentally wandered into the morgue.
You told her about a dead kid? No.
I mean, yes, but only because she overheard me try to talk down a jumper.
She saw a jumper?! Wow, this conversation got away from me fast.
- Let me try to explain.
- Cole, no.
No, no, no.
You don't need to explain.
This is my fault.
I should never have let you watch her.
I ignored my instincts, which I never do.
I guess I was just hoping that That what? (SIGHS) That you're someone you're not.
(DOOR OPENS) Permission to approach the bench? You may.
(LAUGHS) You know, this has been one of the more eventful visits, has it not? It has.
And about what Roger said last night No, don't even think about it.
- He's a very excitable man.
- He is.
And that's one of the reasons I love him.
He's my husband, Daddy.
- Mmm.
- And he's not wrong.
- You provoke him.
- What? Daddy, the mayor? You knew the mayor wasn't coming to Roger's ceremony, because I told you he wasn't.
Uh, sweetheart, uh, uh, I forgot.
No, you did not forget.
You don't forget anything.
And I think you know exactly what you were doing, even if you don't know why.
Daddy? Don't make me choose between the two of you.
Okay? I heard what happened.
How are things with the judge? Trish still has me in the doghouse.
Wouldn't let me leave without carrying this.
Pocket Penal Code.
You never know when that might come in handy, Rog.
- You want it? - Mine's signed.
Yeah.
Anyway, where are we with Rodney, the lottery commissioner? He's in the wind.
But according to his brother, he's a gambler, in debt big-time with the Armenians.
And your human Frogger act paid off.
Tell him what you found on the laptop.
Well, before you caught Mateo, he hacked into Rodney's bank account and emptied it all.
All seven million dollars.
Okay, well, the Armenians are gonna be after it.
So, Bailey, we need to Follow the money? We need to find the funds.
You're right.
That's totally different.
- Totally different.
- May I coin something? Go grab your lunch from the fridge, - he right be here soon.
- Okay.
(PHONE CHIMES) (BELL TINKLES) S-Sorry, we're-we're not open yet.
That's okay.
We're not here to eat.
No.
- No, no.
- Don't be scared, sweetheart.
I hear you have a guardian angel.
Bridget Gerhart.
The waitress from the Frabble Shack.
She said that Mateo ate there all the time.
Her husband's the one that Mateo killed.
He called himself a guardian angel.
I wonder if he was watching over her.
BAILEY: Someone just initiated a seven million dollar withdrawal from Bridget's account.
The IP address matches the Frabble Shack.
They must've found her.
- Did you call the restaurant? - The line's dead.
Bailey, call the bank.
Tell 'em to put a hold on the account.
We need to stall.
You're stalling.
Get it done.
Mateo told me what he did to your husband.
You don't want to make your kid an orphan, do you? (CLATTERING) What was that? Go check.
Max, run! (SIREN APPROACHING) I'll go after the kid.
You find Bridget.
Okay.
LAPD! (GUNSHOT) Get down! - (GUNSHOTS) - (SHOUTS) You stay there.
(GRUNTING) Hey, Fatty! (GRUNTING) (GRUNTING) You stabbed me.
(PANTING, GROANING) (GRUNTS) (PANTING) Don can never know.
NATALIE: So you can have any breakfast you want and you are picking a Frabble? Dad got one for me yesterday, but I never got to have it.
Yesterday was a little crazy, huh? Yeah, kinda.
He really has no idea how to be a dad.
(GRUNTING) That's my fault.
I should've taken things slower with the two of you.
No, Mom, it's a good thing.
At least now I know he wants to try.
(GRUNTING) Aah! Hold on, kid! (GRUNTS) You okay? We're gonna climb down now, all right? We're not climbing down.
We have to find-find another way to get out of here, all right? NATALIE: Oh, there's something going on in the Frabble Shack.
Looks like it's closed.
Move it, let's go.
I'm sorry, sweetie.
No Frabble today.
That's okay.
Maybe Dad can take me another time.
Maya, I know he's not like other dads but he would do anything for you.
I want you to know that.
It's okay.
I'm one of the good guys.
I promise.
There you go.
I got you.
Don't worry, Mom.
I know.
Put the candles on the cake You see how the balloons move? And it says for Daddy.
You see that? - That's so beautiful.
- Hi.
Hey! (CHUCKLES) Hi.
This looks so good.
You went all out, Avery.
Don't tell anybody, but I might have scooped some money out of the motor pool budget.
- (LAUGHS) - Hey, hey, Cap.
- Look, I need your help.
- Okay.
Should I hit him with a "Dad's old" joke or hit him with a bald joke? Ooh, I feel like you got to go with the old joke first.
- Old joke? - Uh, neither.
There will be no roasting.
(GIGGLES) Walk away.
What happened to Don? What do you mean? He was just Uh So, I told Johnnie, "What rhymes with 'acquit'?" And the rest is history, as they say.
- (LAUGHS) - (CHUCKLING) Hey, guys, can I, uh, get a minute with the judge, please? Hey, uh, I appreciate you coming, Don.
Oh, your big day I wouldn't miss it.
And this is not easy for me to say, but I want to thank you for saving my life.
You know, Dershowitz said my forward was a little long, - but thank God it was.
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah, right? I'm sorry about how I spoke to you the other day.
For better or worse, you're the one person on planet Earth that makes me feel that insecure.
Oh.
So you think you've cornered the world's market on insecurity? Come on.
You, Don? (CHUCKLES) You were a federal judge.
I was a lot of things.
I was a judge, a husband, a father.
(SIGHS) But that all falls away.
You'll see.
When I was young (CHUCKLES) Patricia thought the sun rose and set with me.
(WHISPERS): She still does.
You know, what's funny, when you're young, you worry that your kids will wind up with someone not good enough for them.
But I tell you, the real fear is that they'll wind up with someone better than you.
Whew.
Well you'll always be her father.
Mm.
That's a lifetime honorific.
- (CHUCKLES) - (CHUCKLES): Th-That's a good one.
That's a good one.
Let's go enjoy this party.
Did you have fun (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) Breaking my heart Hell of a party, Roger.
Happy 30th.
Well, what's this? I made you a Frabble.
We got some strawberry ice cream, some half-and-half from the break room, and your personal favorite a buttload of schnapps.
Cheers.
You drink first.
Hey.
I'm only gonna say this once, so listen close.
You were right.
I'm a very lucky man.
Did you have fun My, my, oh, my Maybe I You sure are, Roger.
I forgive you Don't take it for granted.
Maybe yes Maybe no Maybe yeah.
(KNOCKING) Hey.
Hey.
Did Maya forget something? No.
I was just Actually, you want to know what I was thinking about? You remember that date we had in Tripoli? The kafta place, right? Yes.
Yeah, how could I forget? During that dinner, these fireworks went off and I got a little scared.
A little? You full-on dove under the table.
I did not dive.
Crouched, maybe.
I've seen crouches.
You dove.
Okay, fine, I dove.
And even though it was nothing, you got down there with me.
Cole, I forgot how safe you made me feel.
And I know that when Maya's around you, she feels that, too.
MAYA: You guys done talking about me yet? Uh, you were supposed to wait in the car.
Yeah, that's her move.
Maya reminded me that she was promised a night at her dad's.
And, technically, she spent it in the ER, so You owe me.
I owe her.
Sounds like my hands are tied.
Great.
Have fun, you two.
Just, um, maybe stay away from the water sports.
Thank you.
My lady.
Ah, you're making a big mistake, son.
(CHUCKLES) You keep talking.
I already have one of your bishops and both your knights.
That's because I'm using the Petrov Defense, and you're walking right on into it.
Yeah, right.
(CHUCKLES) DON: I learned it from the great Bobby Fischer.
- MURTAUGH: (SPUTTERS) Please.
- (LAUGHS) Good night, boys.
(LAUGHS) Let's rack it up again.
All right, all right.
And tied around me Again, begin to give Your life.