The Boys (2019) s03e03 Episode Script
Barbary Coast
1
- [laughter]
- [chattering]
[Donna] All right, remember,
loose shoulders,
let your diaphragm do the rest,
and don't tense up
when you hit the high notes.
Mom, I can't. It hurts.
- It's just a little tummy ache.
- It's not my tummy.
- It's my side.
- What am I gonna say to you?
[both] Pain is weakness leaving the body.
That's right. We are winners.
And that means that we do
whatever it takes to win.
So you go out there and just keep smiling.
Okay, baby?
[softly] All right.
You look beautiful.
[announcer] Next up,
from Des Moines, Iowa
- [applause]
- contestant 15,
- Starlight.
- ["Baby One More Time" plays]
Oh, baby, baby ♪
Oh, baby, baby ♪
How was I supposed to know ♪
- [cheering]
- [whistling]
That something wasn't right here? ♪
My loneliness is killing me ♪
And I ♪
I must confess, I still believe ♪
Still believe ♪
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind ♪
Give me a sign ♪
Hit me, baby, one more time ♪
[cheering, applause]
[Homelander] My whole life,
rich people, powerful people
tried to muzzle me, cancel me,
keep me-me impotent and-and obedient,
like I'm a [bleep] puppet.
- [footsteps running]
- You know what? It worked.
Hey, Ashley, what's crisis management
saying about this?
Sorry, Starlight, not now!
[Homelander] And guess what.
If they can control me, then you can
bet your ass they can control you.
They're already doing it.
You just don't realize it.
I'm done.
I am done apologizing.
I am done being persecuted
for my strength.
[video rewinding]
done being persecuted for my strength.
[video rewinding]
persecuted for my strength.
persecuted
persecuted persecuted
- [Ashley] You're up!
- [rapid footsteps]
You're up!
- No knock?
- Oh, fuck, I'm sorry.
Um, I'm Yeah, I'm gonna come back later.
Wait.
What do you mean, I'm up?
Twenty-one points with your base.
What did you just say to me?
Twenty-one points.
They loved your speech.
A massive 44% uptick
with white males in the Rust Belt.
- [exhales] Yes.
- I know.
Fuck yes. Yes!
They're saying you're confident
and unapologetic
and that you're not afraid to
Keep fucking going, Ashley. Don't stop.
- Um, I'm sorry, sir.
- What?
[exhales] Um
Uh [stammers] That's got
nothing to do with you.
- Just keep going. Not afraid to what?
- Not afraid to be yourself.
[stifled laugh]
They want me to be myself?
Now, um
you did slip seven points
with urban-area adults 18 to 34.
But it's not bad. It's good.
Because ultimately, everybody
loves you and Starlight as a team.
Together, you have a Q rating of 98%.
No one's ever been that high.
Not Soldier Boy, not anyone.
Ninety-eight.
[gasps]
[retching, spitting]
[panting]
[yells]
[panting]
Express yourself ♪
I'm expressing
With my full capabilities ♪
And now I'm living
In correctional facilities ♪
'Cause some don't agree
With how I do this ♪
I get straight
Meditate like a Buddhist ♪
I'm-a be back,
you got to police your shit.
This is the Flatiron Building.
It's a historic motherfucking building.
We got to put some respect
on the building's name.
- Look at this.
- Uh-uh-uh.
- What?
- Use a plate.
But I don't use a plate when I eat
your mother's sweet and savory vagin.
[both laugh]
[groans] What is Kimiko doing?
- Are you kidding me? Come on.
- [Frenchie] Oh, hey, hey. Come on.
Come on. She's been suffering
the dreary sting of ennui, okay?
You give her some space.
- [Mother's Milk] The prodigal son returns.
- [Hughie] What the fuck?
- [laughter]
- Hey, man.
Yeah, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Are you t Are you back?
[Mother's Milk] We'll see.
Don't get me wrong,
I'm happy, but are-are you sure?
What the fuck happened here, kid?
You jacking off with razors again?
You know, you should see the other guy.
Other guy's my penis.
[both laugh]
- I missed you, kid.
- I missed you, too, man.
Come on, man.
[sighs]
Look, I know what
you're gonna say, and I just
No, no, mate. I'm just chuffed
to have all the Boys back
under the same roof, all right?
- Really?
- Yeah.
I mean, there he was, right?
In his fancy pants,
lording it over us
like the viceroy of Vought Square, eh?
And that whole time, he weren't nothing
- but a Supe's bootlick, eh?
- Yeah.
- [cell phone buzzing]
- That, my son, is a lifetime achievement
- at the Cunt of the Year Awards, isn't it?
- Yeah, it is.
- It is a lifetime achievement.
- [Butcher laughs]
- Are you done?
- No, mate,
I am just getting started, believe you me.
Great, listen, we need to get
Ryan somewhere safe.
Vicky knows where he is,
because we fucking told her,
which means Stan Edgar knows, too.
Yeah, one step ahead.
Colonel's already
done a runner with the boy.
They're well out of sight.
In fact, we were gonna
pay them a little visit.
We are?
Uh, Monsieur Charcutier, uh, I cannot go.
- I have a matter of great importance.
- [Butcher] Oh, I'm sorry.
I must've forgot to run it
by your bleeding secretary.
- It's an emergency.
- I-I'll go instead.
Nah, you skive off today,
and that congresswoman
might split your pretty little buns.
Yeah, thought of that.
Uh, Kimiko.
Kimiko? Hi.
Uh, can you please uh, break my arm?
Vicky will smell it if I fake being sick,
so it's got to be real,
and it's got to last for days.
[laughs] Fucking hell, Hughie.
At least take something
for the pain. I got opium.
Government employees
can't fail a piss test.
Let's just get this over with, okay?
Just do it pretty fast.
H-Hold, hold, hold up.
Have a seat, please.
Only been here three minutes,
and it's already The Bold and the Batshit.
All right. Go ahead.
- Okay.
- [stammers]
Right here. Clean break.
No permanent damage.
[exhales]
Yeah?
One, two
[screaming]
What the shit?
I'm the first Super in a hijab, aren't I?
So if I can get myself
into The Seven, lit, man.
So, we're thinking slot one
goes to Supersonic.
For girls 11 to 14,
he's a real panty-dropper.
That's horrifying.
Please never say that again.
He's also a slam dunk
for the Latinx market.
We are desperate to get
into Central and South America.
Did you know that salsa
is more popular than ketchup?
Is Supersonic an ambitious
second-generation Mexican American
chasing his lifelong sueño
of joining The Seven?
Or is he chasing
a rekindled pasión with Starlight?
Okay, you do know
that I have a boyfriend, right?
Love triangles, they generate a 47% surge
in trending topics on social platforms.
- Fans will ship the fuck out of you.
- [chuckles]
Let me talk to him first.
Amazing. Uh, what do you think
of our second choice?
- Moonshadow.
- She's body positive
- but not too body positive.
- Still fuckable.
So fuckable.
No one asked you, Ashley.
Sorry, Ashley.
Okay, that's also horrifying,
but I'm thinking Silver Kincaid.
[Ashley] But she's, uh
She's from Afghan
- She's from England.
- istan?
And she has the highest rescue stats
of any of the finalists,
and she's a UNICEF ambassador.
She's the most qualified.
Well, we're gonna have to run
all of this past Homelander,
- of course.
- Of course.
Actually, according to my contract
with Mr. Edgar,
I get final say over the two slots.
[chuckles]
So, why don't you run that
past Homelander, hmm?
Bonjour, Cherie.
Did you bring the passports?
[chuckles, cries]
Hey.
What is wrong?
Serge, I fucked up.
I went back to work for Little Nina.
Merde, Cherie.
Some of us can't get cushy jobs
at the CIA.
I was moving weight for her,
and these fucking assholes boosted it.
Can you find them?
They wore masks.
I don't know who they were.
And I was high.
Okay. How much?
Eleven kilos.
We pay her back.
We pay her back. We beg
No, you know it's the principle
of the thing with Nina.
You remember Olivier?
How many pieces did she cut off him
while he was still alive?
[shudders, sniffles]
Come with me.
We can go someplace warm.
Just you and me.
Huh?
Sorry.
[Cherie sighs]
[umbrella opens]
[footsteps departing]
Oh, Marvin. What are you doing here?
Poor judgment, ma'am.
[Ryan] Butcher!
[chuckling] Hi.
Oh!
Oh, easy does it, lad.
Bloody death grip you got there.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.
Right as rain.
Come on in.
The fuck was that?
Didn't know he had it in him.
So, why did you come back?
Soldier Boy killed my family.
[Butcher] Are you sure
this place is secure?
We'll have to keep moving,
but for now, yes.
The only thing that might give us away
is this clown show of yours
shambling onto my driveway.
[chuckles]
Well, I wouldn't be here
if this was just a phone call.
Hey, Alex, just, um,
come here for a second.
[door closes]
["Rock My Kiss" plays]
Um, why are you playing my shitty song?
So he can't hear us.
They want to pick you
as one of the winners tonight.
I first saw you ♪
- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.
And you need to say no.
- What? Why?
- Okay, listen.
I really wish someone told me
what I'm about to tell you.
There's something wrong with Homelander.
Something broken.
He's threatened to murder me
more than once.
He's murdered other people,
and it's only getting worse.
And you're just gonna be putting yourself
and your family in danger.
And pretty much the rest of them, too.
They're so fucking cruel.
Trust me, you don't want this.
Just say that you can't do it.
Say that your family
is having an emergency.
- Don't do it.
- Annie, Annie, stop.
You just told me that
all the shit I swallowed for years
I mean, the band, Vought's racism,
it's all for, it's all for nothing, right?
- Look, I'm so
- Look, I need a second.
I'm really sorry, but, please,
you need to promise me that you will leave
and you'll never look back. Please.
Kick off those UGGs
And slide up next to me, all right ♪
[siren wailing in distance]
So they chauffeuring you around now, huh?
Like you Rihanna.
Never needed a license, always just ran.
- How'd you know I'd be here?
- I'm your brother.
And I still know a few people.
So how bad is it?
Doctors say it's like playing
Russian roulette.
If I ever run again, maybe nothing,
but maybe my heart
You still on that blue shit?
That shit'll probably kill me even faster.
Good. Then we can skip to the part
where I accept your apology
and you can come back to the crib with me.
Sure the boys would love to see you, man.
Butcher said you have powers.
Me, too.
Do you like yours?
Do you ever get scared of them?
Me, too.
Aunt Grace wanted to get me a dog, but
I told her no.
I was afraid I'd hurt it.
[typing on cell phone]
I'm sure you didn't mean it.
[typing on cell phone]
Yeah.
Me, too.
Neuman's head of the bureau
because I said so.
I tried to save her
from the attack on Congress
that she fucking caused.
Well, at least you didn't spend
the last year getting her oat milk lattes
and every piece of intel she asked for.
I would very much like to know
the plan to eliminate her.
Well, that depends on what you can tell us
about your little holiday
down in Nicaragua.
- I've never been to Nicaragua.
- Really?
'Cause a little birdie told me
you were Payback's
case officer down there,
on a classified job
that Soldier Boy never come back from.
[scoffs]
Colonel?
Whatever it is William
thinks he may have heard,
he's mistaken.
Is he?
You know that safe
you got in your home office?
The one behind the picture
of Bush number one?
Well, I borrowed a ledger from it,
the one with all your assets
around the world.
How long do you think them
and their families will last
when I put every one
of their fucking names on Facebook?
You'd sign the death warrants
of dozens of innocent people
who had nothing to do with this?
I'm embarrassed for the both of us
that you're asking.
Nicaragua's ancient history.
Not to mention I could be killed
just for telling you.
And all your agents
will get killed if you don't.
Blimey.
What a pickle.
It was part of Operation Charly.
Operation Charly?
Reagan's pet project, off the books.
Help the Contra rebels fight
the Russian-backed Sandinistas,
but we needed a way to pay for it.
Some of the cash
came from selling arms to Iran,
Oliver North's epic fuckup.
But the rest?
If there's one thing that the Contras
had plenty of, it was cocaine.
I was in charge of trafficking
the coke into the US
and then using the profits
to buy more weapons.
In the fight against the Reds,
whatever it took.
That's some self-justifying bullshit.
Were you part of that other thing, too?
What other thing?
She knows.
Tell him.
The unwritten policy
was to sell the cocaine strictly
to minority neighborhoods.
Destabilize, demoralize,
while staying out of white ones.
Late in '84, we were gearing up
for a major offensive,
so the higher-ups,
in their infinite wisdom,
decided it was the perfect time
to throw a wrench in the works.
["Rock You Like a Hurricane" playing]
[cheering]
Here I am ♪
Rock you like a hurricane ♪
My body is burning ♪
[Mallory] Fucking Payback.
Each more ridiculous than the next.
Crimson Countess, Mindstorm,
Swatto, the TNT Twins,
Noir, Gunpowder,
and the most idiotic of them all
What do you say, Gunpowder?
Give them the Fourth of July?
Let's light them up, Soldier Boy.
Please put that down.
Ah, well, didn't realize they made
case officers as pretty as you.
We're just having some fun.
Our munitions dump is in that direction.
You're about to blow up half the camp.
Put it down.
Now.
I do like the assertive type.
You know, with a figure like yours,
you are wasted down here.
Here I am
Rock you like a hurricane ♪
My humblest apologies.
I'm sure this is disorienting.
Let's start over.
Officer Grace Mallory, isn't it?
- Mmm.
- Stanford Edgar.
I'm an associate with Vought American.
Do you want to explain what the fuck
this freak show's all about?
Vought American has entered
into a partnership with the US government
- in the global war against communism.
- Oh.
Payback will embed themselves
and fight alongside the Contra rebels.
Think of it as a trial run.
A trial run for what?
Superheroes in the military, of course.
For the first time in over 30 years.
- Just imagine how dominant we'd be.
- [buzzing]
Jesus Christ. Get down!
What's the problem?
The problem
is that the enemy might spot
a fucking flying man
above the tree line and find our position.
She's right, Swatto.
No flights without
Officer Mallory's clearance.
Is this a joke?
Supes aren't soldiers.
They're undisciplined dipshits.
Untrained and untested.
They do not belong in a war zone.
They belong on That's Incredible!
Tell that to Soldier Boy.
He's a living, breathing American hero.
I'm not allowing this.
I'm sure Director Casey will address
any concerns you may have.
Oh, and, uh, we need a couple of your men
to fetch water for our tents.
Thank you so much.
["Despiértame Antes
De Que Te Vayas" playing]
Claudio.
[in Spanish]
Señorita, fuck the Yankees.
[laughs]
[song continues in Spanish]
[Edgar] Will the others go along?
[Black Noir] Everyone but Gunpowder.
[Edgar] Good luck, Earving.
[Black Noir] Can you please stop
eating those in front of me. I'm allergic.
[sighs] So, listen,
if I'm gonna take a more
central role on the team,
then I want to lose the mask.
Silent ninjas score extremely high
with boys seven to ten years old.
The mask lends a certain mystique.
Well, fuck mystique.
People don't even know
it's me under this thing.
I got to wear it just to get a cab.
Payback is the country's
premier superhero team.
The whole country.
Sadly, a Black member's still a nonstarter
below the Mason-Dixon.
Well, I could be bigger than that.
I could be Eddie Murphy.
[crunching]
[sighs]
I'm not wearing the mask.
Your choice.
Though, once you're farmed out
to Minneapolis-St. Paul,
you'll want the mask
simply for warmth.
You should smile more.
- I bet it's a beautiful smile.
- Okay, look,
as an ambassador
from Planet Actual Woman,
I just I got to tell you,
I know that you think
these lines work, but
Oh, they do. Just ask Loni Anderson.
They don't, and they never have.
The women are either humoring you,
or they're scared of you,
but none of them like you.
You know, if you were a little nicer,
maybe you'd find a man,
instead of out here playing Captain Lesbo.
- Hey, Señorita Mallory
- [gunfire]
[screaming]
[Butcher] Hold that thought.
[stomach rumbling]
What the hell is going on with him?
- [door opens]
- [Homelander] Ah.
- There she is.
- You mind?
- I'm just grabbing a bite to eat.
- Nope.
I do not mind at all. So
Ashley tells me
that you chose Silver Kinca
- Kincaid.
- Mm-hmm.
- I have notes.
- Mm-hmm.
I mean, I'm a cocaptain.
It's only fair I have a say
in the new recruits, right?
No, actually, I choose the new members.
But I am pitching the craziest twist.
The audience will never
see it coming, right?
Well, I've made my decision.
Oh, come on.
You haven't even heard it yet.
Seriously, you're-you're
gonna love it. Ready?
Return of the Deep.
- [Homelander laughs] Hey.
- [Deep] Hey.
What's up, guys? How are you?
[Homelander] No, no, no, no, Starlight,
before you say anything,
doesn't Christ tell us
to turn the other cheek?
[chuckles, grunts]
I really want us to be sisters.
Mmm.
[Deep] I had something
made for you, Starlight.
It's a peace offering.
It's 24-karat gold
with certified conflict-free diamonds.
I've put in the work,
and I realize that when you've
made an unforgivable mistake,
the first person you have to forgive
is yourself.
What makes you think
that I want a daily reminder
of the guy who fucking mouth-raped me?
I need a word.
Let's let these two chat, shall we?
Okay. I'll just [chuckles]
[door opens]
Absolutely not.
Do you really think I'm gonna let
a fucking Muslim in The Seven?
Captain Al-Qaeda? We're Americans.
- I'm taking this to Mr. Edgar.
- My speech last night?
38.6 rating and a 59 share.
Oh, and they're saying
that the live-plus-threes
are gonna be even bigger.
Edgar said it himself,
popularity is power.
He won't die on this hill.
Do I need to remind you
of the Flight 37 video?
[scoffs]
Go ahead. Release it.
Let's light this candle, huh?
I mean, sure, I'll lose everything,
but then
I'll have nothing to lose.
First, I'll take out the nerve centers
White House, Pentagon,
then any domestic defense capabilities,
and then critical infrastructure
like cellular, Internet,
that kind of thing.
And then
Well, I think then
I'll just wipe New York
off the fucking map
for fun.
I'll even throw in Des Moines
and that little cousin-fucker hick town
that Maeve's from, 'cause why not?
See, Starlight, I'd prefer to be loved.
I would, but if you
take that away from me,
well, being feared
is A-one okey doke by me.
So
[sighs]
Go ahead, partner.
Do it.
No?
You don't want to do it?
[sighs] Well, then I would have to say
that you have absolutely
no fucking leverage
because I am the Homelander.
And I really can do
whatever the fuck I want.
- [door opens]
- [kissing, moaning]
[Deep] Okay.
- Okay, so tomorrow
- Uh-huh.
you have the
"Recontextualizing Feminism" panel
with Rose McGowan and Alyssa Milano.
Ooh, I love Charmed.
- Hey, babe, I'm serious.
- Yeah?
- We need to cover your ass
- [grunts]
in case that bitch Starlight
comes after you again.
Thanks, babe. I couldn't
have done this without you.
You're telling me.
[grunts]
- [both breathing heavily]
- [Deep] Yeah.
[both moaning]
Oh, yeah?
- Yeah, you like that?
- Oh, fuck yeah.
Oh, yeah.
[Deep] Oh, God.
- You're so fucking wet.
- Oh, it's all you, baby. It's all you.
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
What are you gonna do?
Gonna jerk me off with all your arms?
All my arms?
Yeah. [grunting]
[retching]
[spits]
[sniffles]
[knocking]
[Ryan] Butcher, are you okay?
Yeah, mate. It's all good.
Just give us a minute, yeah?
[Ryan] Do you need any help?
Don't come in.
[cell phone ringing]
- Hey, Annie.
- Homelander's had a breakdown.
He's lost his fucking mind.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Slow down, slow down. What?
He's bringing the Deep
back into The Seven,
so I brought up the video,
and he said to go ahead
and release it. You were right.
Cocaptain was a bad idea.
I have to leave.
Look, I-I know I should tell you
to run out of there like a house on fire,
and I want to
[sighs]but you got to stick it out.
I'm sorry?
Listen, I'm-I'm-I'm back with Butcher.
Why?
We're onto something
that could kill Homelander.
What? What is it?
Some kind of weapon. Uh
I'm not sure,
but you got to buy us some time.
Keep your eyes on him.
How much time?
Uh
You don't know.
So, for God knows how long,
I have to paste on a smile,
with Homelander growing more unstable
by the hour,
hoping that he doesn't kill me or worse.
If that's what it takes, then yeah.
[sighs] I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Just
Homelander and-and Vicky,
they-they're running laps around us
because because we keep trying
to do it the right way.
The high road just doesn't work.
W-We have to be as mean
and fucked-up as they are.
- Now you sound like
- Like Butcher, I know,
but, Annie, he's he's right.
He's been right all along.
I'm just so tired of losing.
[sighs]
Okay.
You better pull this off, Hughie, but
okay.
[phone beeps]
I used to destroy you in slapsies.
You had super speed.
Ow!
- [laughs]
- Khamari.
Put another hand on your brother,
you see what happens.
Hey, Uncle Reg, what's up with that suit?
- Oh, you like it, huh?
- That shit's corny.
Hey, Khamari, that's not
how you talk to your uncle.
[A-Train] Nah, it's-it's all right.
Young men just don't understand
the history.
[Arana] Oh, no, the suit's ridiculous.
But he shouldn't be using
that kind of language.
All right, inside. Both y'all.
All right? And wash your hands.
For real this time.
I didn't want to say nothing, but
Just trying to show the community
I'm down for the cause.
[laughs] Since when you been
down with any cause?
Come on, man.
I mean, I can't run, I can't do shit.
So I got to rebrand.
Stay in the game somehow.
Or you don't. You could just be
my pain-in-the-ass little brother Reg.
Yeah.
Let me tell you, man,
I'm happier coaching these kids
than I ever was working at Vought.
You should come down to the track.
They'd love to see you.
Yeah.
Okay.
Since you want to be down
with the cause so much
Hmm?
I was walking home,
and this mugger came up behind me.
I was terrified.
[newsperson] And that's when
Dana Whitmyre says Blue Hawk
came to her rescue.
[Blue Hawk] At approximately 7:15 p.m.,
I spotted a Black male
following the victim
southbound on Marin Boulevard.
I intercepted him, at which point
the suspect became aggressive.
Brother lived a few houses up the street.
Three kids.
He was just walking home from work.
Blue Hawk curb-stomped him so hard,
it cracked the pavement.
- That's fucked-up.
- Yeah.
Maybe I can throw his family
some cash or something.
They don't need a handout.
They need you to speak up.
You're in The motherfucking Seven.
Yeah, but, I mean [chuckles]
I Listen, I'm Michael Jordan.
I'm not Malcolm X.
Everybody loves the A-Train, right?
[Yevgenny] Sergei.
- Nina wants to see you.
- [Frenchie] Yevgenny.
How's your wife?
She still enjoy getting
her salad tossed by a Frenchman
while her husband tosses nothing?
Another time.
[Yevgenny] Get in.
- [grunting, breathing sharply]
- [sizzling]
Come on. Fucking knock it off.
[exhales]
All right, mate?
- Are you sick?
- No, no.
I had a dodgy kebab, didn't I?
Went straight through me.
Try these.
Well, I'll be.
[chuckles] Your mum used to give me these
when I was under the weather.
[chuckles] Same.
- I hated them.
- I used to crush them up
and put them in the bird feeder
when she wasn't looking.
Well, I don't blame you.
They done off leave your mouth
drier than a nun's
You were gonna say "vagina."
Yeah. Something like that.
[laughs]
It's not just your stomach, though.
Your heart's racing. I can hear it.
And your blood smells funny, too.
Don't you worry, son.
Nothing a good night's kip won't sort.
[Butcher] Sorry about that.
What the hell did you drink last night?
Right.
Where were we?
To the surprise of no one,
that moron Swatto
went for another joy flight,
giving away our position.
Even better, the Sandinistas
brought Russian special forces with them.
Though that didn't matter much
to the Supes.
Those are my men!
[soldiers screaming]
[gunfire]
[shouts]
[soldiers shouting indistinctly]
[soldier] You, stay with me! Go!
[explosion]
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
[buzzing]
[grunting]
[soldier screams]
[gunfire]
Oh, yeah!
Gunpowder! Will you please fucking stop?
[yelps]
[exhales]
[fire crackling]
[sniffles]
[Black Noir coughs]
[Black Noir grunting, gasping]
[Tessa crying]
[Crimson Countess] Oh, God.
They killed Soldier Boy.
- What? Who?
- The Russians.
They had some kind of gun
or-or weapon or something.
- That's impossible.
- No!
- We saw it. We saw it.
- [helicopter whirring]
They took his body.
[Mallory] I lost 116 men.
And Vought got full immunity.
That was the day
I decided to make them pay.
Well, ain't that a wonderful story.
Tell me, Grace,
where did the Ivans take this
Supe gun?
The trail went cold
behind the iron curtain.
It's the truth.
My reach only goes so far.
You knew what Soldier Boy did
to my family,
but you didn't think
I needed to know the truth?
It wasn't that simple.
Marvin, Hugh, give us the room.
You came to me after Becca disappeared
and promised me Homelander's head.
And all this time,
you knew there was something
that could do the job,
and you never said a fucking word.
Whatever this weapon is,
it probably won't work on Homelander.
- And what if it does?
- Even worse.
Because it wouldn't end with him.
You'd go after another Supe,
then another, then all of them.
If you'd have told me about this sooner,
Homelander might already be dead.
Ryan wouldn't be running
from one safe house to the next,
wondering when his nutter dad's
gonna drop out of the sky.
And Becca
Becca might still be alive.
And for that
I'll never fucking forgive you.
This was never about Ryan or Becca.
It was always selfish.
Always and only for you.
For the hate inside
that you want to let loose on the world.
I thought maybe you changed,
but I was wrong.
You are your father.
Always have been.
- What happened?
- We're off.
Butcher, wait up.
Where-where are you going?
- The city.
- When will I see you again?
You won't. Ain't safe for you.
Wait!
- What are you talking about?
- I got to go.
- Ryan, let go.
- No.
You said you'd always watch out for me.
- You promised!
- Ryan, let go.
- I won't let you!
- Well, maybe I don't want to look at you.
After what you done to my Becca.
Did you ever think about that?
[Ryan breathing shakily]
I hate you.
[scoffs]
[announcer speaking Russian on TV]
[footsteps approaching]
Sorry if Yevgenny got a little rough.
He's still a bit bitter
you ate his wife's anus.
[lighter clicks]
Why am I here, Nina?
Do you remember Mikhail Petrov?
You wait for him to come home.
He step out of his minivan.
You attack. He knocks the blade
from your hand,
so you slam this Honda Odyssey
minivan sliding doors
on his neck over and over
until he's [inhales deeply]
decapitated.
Art. Who can define it?
Then you discovered his young bride
in the passenger seat,
and my Sergei
does not leave a witness behind.
Where is Cherie?
I don't know.
[grunts softly]
She had a place in Bayonne
last time I saw her.
Why?
'Cause nobody stole heroin from her.
She stole it from me.
I will give her a quick death, pazhalsta,
and I will make this worth your while.
I don't do that shit anymore.
Nobody changes, hmm?
What was your safe word again?
When I used the dog collar
and the strap-on? What was it?
Vincent Cassel.
You are like rabid little doggy
but loyal to whoever holds this chain.
Before William Butcher, it was me.
Before me, it was your daddy.
But you always heel, Sergei.
Not Sergei.
Serge.
And that was a long time ago.
Who I am now is someone
who works for the CIA, Nina.
So unless you want the full weight
of the government up your ass
I'm leaving.
We both have had bigger things
than the government up our asses.
Just think about my offer.
Go on, scamper away, little doggy.
[electronic bell chimes]
- Deep, welcome home, brother.
- [Ashley] Hear! Hear!
Oh, thanks, Homelander.
- This literally means everything to me.
- [Homelander chuckles]
- To us.
- [Deep] To us.
[Homelander] Ah! Here we are.
- Ooh.
- Excellent.
Okay, so, I took the liberty
of ordering for all of us,
but I'm pretty sure
you're gonna love my selection. Okay?
[chuckles]
- Thank you, gentlemen.
- Yes, sir.
[Homelander] Mmm.
Could I just get some some bread?
[Homelander] Come on, now.
You're back in the big leagues, buddy.
Nothing but the best for you.
[Deep grunts softly]
I'm so hungry. [slurps]
[Homelander] Know who
I've been reading up on lately?
Dr. Martin Luther King.
Well, my relationship with King
has deepened of late.
He was, uh, villainized.
Persecuted. Spoke truth to power.
Just like me. It's crazy. But
we've both been to the mountaintop,
and we've seen the promised land.
I showed people the real me,
and they loved me for it.
[laughs] I mean, they fucking loved me.
[chuckles]
If only I'd known that sooner.
[exhales] There's always been
so, so many things I want to do,
and now I can do them all, finally.
And no one can stop me.
Nobody.
Free at last.
Free at last.
Oh! Excellent.
- Deep, that's for you, big guy.
- Me?
- Thank you, sir.
- Mm-hmm.
Wonderful.
Chef's specialty.
It is a South Korean delicacy.
[gasps] Holy shit, it's Timothy.
Oh, my God.
That's Timoth He's my friend.
I, uh, I can't eat him.
I'm not gonna eat him. I can't
- Oh, yes, you can, Deep.
- No, I'm not gonna
Timothy is fucking delicious.
[grunts]
He's-he's-he's begging for his life.
He has kids.
[cell phone whooshes]
- He has kids.
- [cell phone vibrates]
- Hey, Deep?
- What?
Eat fucking Timothy.
[gulps]
[grunting quietly]
I'm so sorry.
He's praying. He's praying.
- [gags]
- [Homelander] Mmm.
[swallows, grunts]
Wasn't that delicious?
[laughs softly]
- Come on. [mutters]
- [door opens]
Monsieur Charcutier?
You work for him, too.
Wouldn't that be nice, huh?
[door opens]
All right, let's have it.
Where the fuck you been all day?
I was, uh, detained by Little Nina.
Little Nina?
And what does that Russian slag
want with you?
It's a long story.
Hang about.
This is a fucking gold mine, Frenchie.
Set up a meeting
with you, me and Little Nina.
No, no, no. This is a very,
is a very bad idea.
No, Frenchie,
it's a very fucking good idea.
Go on. Get on the phone,
give her a call right now.
Oui, monsieur.
And what are we doing this for?
'Cause, my son, we're going to Russia.
[knocking]
- Hey. Do you have a sec?
- Hey. Hey.
Yeah, yeah. Come in.
Thanks. Um
So I went to talk to the producers,
to tell them that I had a family emergency
and I have to bow out.
Good. That's That's really good.
But, uh, you know, when I got there, I
I told them I was thrilled
to join the team.
No. Alex, Alex, that's that's a mistake.
I was in rehab, would've
killed my mother for some oxy.
Manager bailed on me, Vought, everyone.
But you didn't leave.
So do you really think
I'm gonna bail on you now?
I'm an asshole, but I'm not
that much of an asshole.
Are you sure?
[sighs]
Someone's got to have your back.
Come on, then.
Let's hear it.
I'm a fucking monster
for what I done to the kid.
No.
The others don't get it, but I-I do.
The gloves are off.
If there's anything that I've learned
[Butcher gagging]
[panting]
What the fuck?
[dramatic music playing]
Well, this has been
quite a long road for all of you.
You've shown us the best
of what heroes can be.
[Starlight]
The first of the two selections,
and the newest member of The Seven is
Supersonic.
You can be my favorite girl ♪
And you can rock my world ♪
I never felt like this ♪
Thank you.
Welcome.
Thank you, sir.
[speaking Spanish]
[Homelander chuckles]
[pats shoulder]
Rock my kiss ♪
Well this is it.
The final new member of The Seven is
[dramatic music playing]
Lord of the Seven Seas, the Deep.
[Deep laughs]
- [Homelander] Get up here, you.
- All right.
[Homelander] Welcome back.
Thank you, sir.
- Good to see you.
- You, too.
- Congratulations, bro.
- You, too.
All right, well, unfortunately,
it won't be either of you two.
I'm sure you understand,
you just can't put a price on experience.
Please hang up your capes and go.
Now, Deep, I got to say, I am, uh
Well, frankly, I'm moved and inspired
that Starlight here
has chosen to forgive you.
I accept your apology, Deep.
You deserve a second chance.
Thank you, Starlight.
Looks like we've all grown.
[Homelander] Just to be clear,
it wasn't my idea
to bring you back, buster.
Not at all. Starlight here insisted on it.
But you keep your distance, pal,
because, uh, well
[laughs]she's my girl now.
[laughs softly]
Sorry, I-I can't keep it a secret anymore.
It's time we let the world know.
Starlight and I are in love.
#HomeLight.
- Cut! Incredible.
- Huh?
- That fucking plays, man.
- Oh, my God!
That plays like hell.
- That was perfect. Yeah, yeah.
- People are gonna love it.
[Seth laughing] Incredible! Yes!
[audio distorting]
Okay, that was perfect, uh,
but, Starlight,
I need you to be not so shocked.
[echoing] All right, well,
uh, let's go again.
[Ashley] Starlight?
We good?
[crew] We ready?
Yeah. Let's, uh, let's go again.
- Okay. Going again.
- Yeah, one more. Great.
[Seth] Uh, take it
from your line, Homelander.
- [Homelander] You got it. All right.
- [bell rings]
- That a girl.
- And action.
[whispering] I just can't
keep it a secret anymore.
- Hmm.
- Come on, it's time we let the world know.
Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
[normal volume] Um, everybody,
Starlight and I are in love.
[chuckles] #HomeLight.
- [gasping]
- ["Baby One More Time" plays]
Oh, baby, baby ♪
Oh, baby, baby ♪
How was I supposed to know ♪
That something wasn't right here? ♪
My loneliness is killing me ♪
And I ♪
I must confess, I still believe ♪
Still believe ♪
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind ♪
Give me a sign ♪
Hit me, baby, one more time ♪
[rock music playing]
[music ends]
- [laughter]
- [chattering]
[Donna] All right, remember,
loose shoulders,
let your diaphragm do the rest,
and don't tense up
when you hit the high notes.
Mom, I can't. It hurts.
- It's just a little tummy ache.
- It's not my tummy.
- It's my side.
- What am I gonna say to you?
[both] Pain is weakness leaving the body.
That's right. We are winners.
And that means that we do
whatever it takes to win.
So you go out there and just keep smiling.
Okay, baby?
[softly] All right.
You look beautiful.
[announcer] Next up,
from Des Moines, Iowa
- [applause]
- contestant 15,
- Starlight.
- ["Baby One More Time" plays]
Oh, baby, baby ♪
Oh, baby, baby ♪
How was I supposed to know ♪
- [cheering]
- [whistling]
That something wasn't right here? ♪
My loneliness is killing me ♪
And I ♪
I must confess, I still believe ♪
Still believe ♪
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind ♪
Give me a sign ♪
Hit me, baby, one more time ♪
[cheering, applause]
[Homelander] My whole life,
rich people, powerful people
tried to muzzle me, cancel me,
keep me-me impotent and-and obedient,
like I'm a [bleep] puppet.
- [footsteps running]
- You know what? It worked.
Hey, Ashley, what's crisis management
saying about this?
Sorry, Starlight, not now!
[Homelander] And guess what.
If they can control me, then you can
bet your ass they can control you.
They're already doing it.
You just don't realize it.
I'm done.
I am done apologizing.
I am done being persecuted
for my strength.
[video rewinding]
done being persecuted for my strength.
[video rewinding]
persecuted for my strength.
persecuted
persecuted persecuted
- [Ashley] You're up!
- [rapid footsteps]
You're up!
- No knock?
- Oh, fuck, I'm sorry.
Um, I'm Yeah, I'm gonna come back later.
Wait.
What do you mean, I'm up?
Twenty-one points with your base.
What did you just say to me?
Twenty-one points.
They loved your speech.
A massive 44% uptick
with white males in the Rust Belt.
- [exhales] Yes.
- I know.
Fuck yes. Yes!
They're saying you're confident
and unapologetic
and that you're not afraid to
Keep fucking going, Ashley. Don't stop.
- Um, I'm sorry, sir.
- What?
[exhales] Um
Uh [stammers] That's got
nothing to do with you.
- Just keep going. Not afraid to what?
- Not afraid to be yourself.
[stifled laugh]
They want me to be myself?
Now, um
you did slip seven points
with urban-area adults 18 to 34.
But it's not bad. It's good.
Because ultimately, everybody
loves you and Starlight as a team.
Together, you have a Q rating of 98%.
No one's ever been that high.
Not Soldier Boy, not anyone.
Ninety-eight.
[gasps]
[retching, spitting]
[panting]
[yells]
[panting]
Express yourself ♪
I'm expressing
With my full capabilities ♪
And now I'm living
In correctional facilities ♪
'Cause some don't agree
With how I do this ♪
I get straight
Meditate like a Buddhist ♪
I'm-a be back,
you got to police your shit.
This is the Flatiron Building.
It's a historic motherfucking building.
We got to put some respect
on the building's name.
- Look at this.
- Uh-uh-uh.
- What?
- Use a plate.
But I don't use a plate when I eat
your mother's sweet and savory vagin.
[both laugh]
[groans] What is Kimiko doing?
- Are you kidding me? Come on.
- [Frenchie] Oh, hey, hey. Come on.
Come on. She's been suffering
the dreary sting of ennui, okay?
You give her some space.
- [Mother's Milk] The prodigal son returns.
- [Hughie] What the fuck?
- [laughter]
- Hey, man.
Yeah, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Are you t Are you back?
[Mother's Milk] We'll see.
Don't get me wrong,
I'm happy, but are-are you sure?
What the fuck happened here, kid?
You jacking off with razors again?
You know, you should see the other guy.
Other guy's my penis.
[both laugh]
- I missed you, kid.
- I missed you, too, man.
Come on, man.
[sighs]
Look, I know what
you're gonna say, and I just
No, no, mate. I'm just chuffed
to have all the Boys back
under the same roof, all right?
- Really?
- Yeah.
I mean, there he was, right?
In his fancy pants,
lording it over us
like the viceroy of Vought Square, eh?
And that whole time, he weren't nothing
- but a Supe's bootlick, eh?
- Yeah.
- [cell phone buzzing]
- That, my son, is a lifetime achievement
- at the Cunt of the Year Awards, isn't it?
- Yeah, it is.
- It is a lifetime achievement.
- [Butcher laughs]
- Are you done?
- No, mate,
I am just getting started, believe you me.
Great, listen, we need to get
Ryan somewhere safe.
Vicky knows where he is,
because we fucking told her,
which means Stan Edgar knows, too.
Yeah, one step ahead.
Colonel's already
done a runner with the boy.
They're well out of sight.
In fact, we were gonna
pay them a little visit.
We are?
Uh, Monsieur Charcutier, uh, I cannot go.
- I have a matter of great importance.
- [Butcher] Oh, I'm sorry.
I must've forgot to run it
by your bleeding secretary.
- It's an emergency.
- I-I'll go instead.
Nah, you skive off today,
and that congresswoman
might split your pretty little buns.
Yeah, thought of that.
Uh, Kimiko.
Kimiko? Hi.
Uh, can you please uh, break my arm?
Vicky will smell it if I fake being sick,
so it's got to be real,
and it's got to last for days.
[laughs] Fucking hell, Hughie.
At least take something
for the pain. I got opium.
Government employees
can't fail a piss test.
Let's just get this over with, okay?
Just do it pretty fast.
H-Hold, hold, hold up.
Have a seat, please.
Only been here three minutes,
and it's already The Bold and the Batshit.
All right. Go ahead.
- Okay.
- [stammers]
Right here. Clean break.
No permanent damage.
[exhales]
Yeah?
One, two
[screaming]
What the shit?
I'm the first Super in a hijab, aren't I?
So if I can get myself
into The Seven, lit, man.
So, we're thinking slot one
goes to Supersonic.
For girls 11 to 14,
he's a real panty-dropper.
That's horrifying.
Please never say that again.
He's also a slam dunk
for the Latinx market.
We are desperate to get
into Central and South America.
Did you know that salsa
is more popular than ketchup?
Is Supersonic an ambitious
second-generation Mexican American
chasing his lifelong sueño
of joining The Seven?
Or is he chasing
a rekindled pasión with Starlight?
Okay, you do know
that I have a boyfriend, right?
Love triangles, they generate a 47% surge
in trending topics on social platforms.
- Fans will ship the fuck out of you.
- [chuckles]
Let me talk to him first.
Amazing. Uh, what do you think
of our second choice?
- Moonshadow.
- She's body positive
- but not too body positive.
- Still fuckable.
So fuckable.
No one asked you, Ashley.
Sorry, Ashley.
Okay, that's also horrifying,
but I'm thinking Silver Kincaid.
[Ashley] But she's, uh
She's from Afghan
- She's from England.
- istan?
And she has the highest rescue stats
of any of the finalists,
and she's a UNICEF ambassador.
She's the most qualified.
Well, we're gonna have to run
all of this past Homelander,
- of course.
- Of course.
Actually, according to my contract
with Mr. Edgar,
I get final say over the two slots.
[chuckles]
So, why don't you run that
past Homelander, hmm?
Bonjour, Cherie.
Did you bring the passports?
[chuckles, cries]
Hey.
What is wrong?
Serge, I fucked up.
I went back to work for Little Nina.
Merde, Cherie.
Some of us can't get cushy jobs
at the CIA.
I was moving weight for her,
and these fucking assholes boosted it.
Can you find them?
They wore masks.
I don't know who they were.
And I was high.
Okay. How much?
Eleven kilos.
We pay her back.
We pay her back. We beg
No, you know it's the principle
of the thing with Nina.
You remember Olivier?
How many pieces did she cut off him
while he was still alive?
[shudders, sniffles]
Come with me.
We can go someplace warm.
Just you and me.
Huh?
Sorry.
[Cherie sighs]
[umbrella opens]
[footsteps departing]
Oh, Marvin. What are you doing here?
Poor judgment, ma'am.
[Ryan] Butcher!
[chuckling] Hi.
Oh!
Oh, easy does it, lad.
Bloody death grip you got there.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.
Right as rain.
Come on in.
The fuck was that?
Didn't know he had it in him.
So, why did you come back?
Soldier Boy killed my family.
[Butcher] Are you sure
this place is secure?
We'll have to keep moving,
but for now, yes.
The only thing that might give us away
is this clown show of yours
shambling onto my driveway.
[chuckles]
Well, I wouldn't be here
if this was just a phone call.
Hey, Alex, just, um,
come here for a second.
[door closes]
["Rock My Kiss" plays]
Um, why are you playing my shitty song?
So he can't hear us.
They want to pick you
as one of the winners tonight.
I first saw you ♪
- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.
And you need to say no.
- What? Why?
- Okay, listen.
I really wish someone told me
what I'm about to tell you.
There's something wrong with Homelander.
Something broken.
He's threatened to murder me
more than once.
He's murdered other people,
and it's only getting worse.
And you're just gonna be putting yourself
and your family in danger.
And pretty much the rest of them, too.
They're so fucking cruel.
Trust me, you don't want this.
Just say that you can't do it.
Say that your family
is having an emergency.
- Don't do it.
- Annie, Annie, stop.
You just told me that
all the shit I swallowed for years
I mean, the band, Vought's racism,
it's all for, it's all for nothing, right?
- Look, I'm so
- Look, I need a second.
I'm really sorry, but, please,
you need to promise me that you will leave
and you'll never look back. Please.
Kick off those UGGs
And slide up next to me, all right ♪
[siren wailing in distance]
So they chauffeuring you around now, huh?
Like you Rihanna.
Never needed a license, always just ran.
- How'd you know I'd be here?
- I'm your brother.
And I still know a few people.
So how bad is it?
Doctors say it's like playing
Russian roulette.
If I ever run again, maybe nothing,
but maybe my heart
You still on that blue shit?
That shit'll probably kill me even faster.
Good. Then we can skip to the part
where I accept your apology
and you can come back to the crib with me.
Sure the boys would love to see you, man.
Butcher said you have powers.
Me, too.
Do you like yours?
Do you ever get scared of them?
Me, too.
Aunt Grace wanted to get me a dog, but
I told her no.
I was afraid I'd hurt it.
[typing on cell phone]
I'm sure you didn't mean it.
[typing on cell phone]
Yeah.
Me, too.
Neuman's head of the bureau
because I said so.
I tried to save her
from the attack on Congress
that she fucking caused.
Well, at least you didn't spend
the last year getting her oat milk lattes
and every piece of intel she asked for.
I would very much like to know
the plan to eliminate her.
Well, that depends on what you can tell us
about your little holiday
down in Nicaragua.
- I've never been to Nicaragua.
- Really?
'Cause a little birdie told me
you were Payback's
case officer down there,
on a classified job
that Soldier Boy never come back from.
[scoffs]
Colonel?
Whatever it is William
thinks he may have heard,
he's mistaken.
Is he?
You know that safe
you got in your home office?
The one behind the picture
of Bush number one?
Well, I borrowed a ledger from it,
the one with all your assets
around the world.
How long do you think them
and their families will last
when I put every one
of their fucking names on Facebook?
You'd sign the death warrants
of dozens of innocent people
who had nothing to do with this?
I'm embarrassed for the both of us
that you're asking.
Nicaragua's ancient history.
Not to mention I could be killed
just for telling you.
And all your agents
will get killed if you don't.
Blimey.
What a pickle.
It was part of Operation Charly.
Operation Charly?
Reagan's pet project, off the books.
Help the Contra rebels fight
the Russian-backed Sandinistas,
but we needed a way to pay for it.
Some of the cash
came from selling arms to Iran,
Oliver North's epic fuckup.
But the rest?
If there's one thing that the Contras
had plenty of, it was cocaine.
I was in charge of trafficking
the coke into the US
and then using the profits
to buy more weapons.
In the fight against the Reds,
whatever it took.
That's some self-justifying bullshit.
Were you part of that other thing, too?
What other thing?
She knows.
Tell him.
The unwritten policy
was to sell the cocaine strictly
to minority neighborhoods.
Destabilize, demoralize,
while staying out of white ones.
Late in '84, we were gearing up
for a major offensive,
so the higher-ups,
in their infinite wisdom,
decided it was the perfect time
to throw a wrench in the works.
["Rock You Like a Hurricane" playing]
[cheering]
Here I am ♪
Rock you like a hurricane ♪
My body is burning ♪
[Mallory] Fucking Payback.
Each more ridiculous than the next.
Crimson Countess, Mindstorm,
Swatto, the TNT Twins,
Noir, Gunpowder,
and the most idiotic of them all
What do you say, Gunpowder?
Give them the Fourth of July?
Let's light them up, Soldier Boy.
Please put that down.
Ah, well, didn't realize they made
case officers as pretty as you.
We're just having some fun.
Our munitions dump is in that direction.
You're about to blow up half the camp.
Put it down.
Now.
I do like the assertive type.
You know, with a figure like yours,
you are wasted down here.
Here I am
Rock you like a hurricane ♪
My humblest apologies.
I'm sure this is disorienting.
Let's start over.
Officer Grace Mallory, isn't it?
- Mmm.
- Stanford Edgar.
I'm an associate with Vought American.
Do you want to explain what the fuck
this freak show's all about?
Vought American has entered
into a partnership with the US government
- in the global war against communism.
- Oh.
Payback will embed themselves
and fight alongside the Contra rebels.
Think of it as a trial run.
A trial run for what?
Superheroes in the military, of course.
For the first time in over 30 years.
- Just imagine how dominant we'd be.
- [buzzing]
Jesus Christ. Get down!
What's the problem?
The problem
is that the enemy might spot
a fucking flying man
above the tree line and find our position.
She's right, Swatto.
No flights without
Officer Mallory's clearance.
Is this a joke?
Supes aren't soldiers.
They're undisciplined dipshits.
Untrained and untested.
They do not belong in a war zone.
They belong on That's Incredible!
Tell that to Soldier Boy.
He's a living, breathing American hero.
I'm not allowing this.
I'm sure Director Casey will address
any concerns you may have.
Oh, and, uh, we need a couple of your men
to fetch water for our tents.
Thank you so much.
["Despiértame Antes
De Que Te Vayas" playing]
Claudio.
[in Spanish]
Señorita, fuck the Yankees.
[laughs]
[song continues in Spanish]
[Edgar] Will the others go along?
[Black Noir] Everyone but Gunpowder.
[Edgar] Good luck, Earving.
[Black Noir] Can you please stop
eating those in front of me. I'm allergic.
[sighs] So, listen,
if I'm gonna take a more
central role on the team,
then I want to lose the mask.
Silent ninjas score extremely high
with boys seven to ten years old.
The mask lends a certain mystique.
Well, fuck mystique.
People don't even know
it's me under this thing.
I got to wear it just to get a cab.
Payback is the country's
premier superhero team.
The whole country.
Sadly, a Black member's still a nonstarter
below the Mason-Dixon.
Well, I could be bigger than that.
I could be Eddie Murphy.
[crunching]
[sighs]
I'm not wearing the mask.
Your choice.
Though, once you're farmed out
to Minneapolis-St. Paul,
you'll want the mask
simply for warmth.
You should smile more.
- I bet it's a beautiful smile.
- Okay, look,
as an ambassador
from Planet Actual Woman,
I just I got to tell you,
I know that you think
these lines work, but
Oh, they do. Just ask Loni Anderson.
They don't, and they never have.
The women are either humoring you,
or they're scared of you,
but none of them like you.
You know, if you were a little nicer,
maybe you'd find a man,
instead of out here playing Captain Lesbo.
- Hey, Señorita Mallory
- [gunfire]
[screaming]
[Butcher] Hold that thought.
[stomach rumbling]
What the hell is going on with him?
- [door opens]
- [Homelander] Ah.
- There she is.
- You mind?
- I'm just grabbing a bite to eat.
- Nope.
I do not mind at all. So
Ashley tells me
that you chose Silver Kinca
- Kincaid.
- Mm-hmm.
- I have notes.
- Mm-hmm.
I mean, I'm a cocaptain.
It's only fair I have a say
in the new recruits, right?
No, actually, I choose the new members.
But I am pitching the craziest twist.
The audience will never
see it coming, right?
Well, I've made my decision.
Oh, come on.
You haven't even heard it yet.
Seriously, you're-you're
gonna love it. Ready?
Return of the Deep.
- [Homelander laughs] Hey.
- [Deep] Hey.
What's up, guys? How are you?
[Homelander] No, no, no, no, Starlight,
before you say anything,
doesn't Christ tell us
to turn the other cheek?
[chuckles, grunts]
I really want us to be sisters.
Mmm.
[Deep] I had something
made for you, Starlight.
It's a peace offering.
It's 24-karat gold
with certified conflict-free diamonds.
I've put in the work,
and I realize that when you've
made an unforgivable mistake,
the first person you have to forgive
is yourself.
What makes you think
that I want a daily reminder
of the guy who fucking mouth-raped me?
I need a word.
Let's let these two chat, shall we?
Okay. I'll just [chuckles]
[door opens]
Absolutely not.
Do you really think I'm gonna let
a fucking Muslim in The Seven?
Captain Al-Qaeda? We're Americans.
- I'm taking this to Mr. Edgar.
- My speech last night?
38.6 rating and a 59 share.
Oh, and they're saying
that the live-plus-threes
are gonna be even bigger.
Edgar said it himself,
popularity is power.
He won't die on this hill.
Do I need to remind you
of the Flight 37 video?
[scoffs]
Go ahead. Release it.
Let's light this candle, huh?
I mean, sure, I'll lose everything,
but then
I'll have nothing to lose.
First, I'll take out the nerve centers
White House, Pentagon,
then any domestic defense capabilities,
and then critical infrastructure
like cellular, Internet,
that kind of thing.
And then
Well, I think then
I'll just wipe New York
off the fucking map
for fun.
I'll even throw in Des Moines
and that little cousin-fucker hick town
that Maeve's from, 'cause why not?
See, Starlight, I'd prefer to be loved.
I would, but if you
take that away from me,
well, being feared
is A-one okey doke by me.
So
[sighs]
Go ahead, partner.
Do it.
No?
You don't want to do it?
[sighs] Well, then I would have to say
that you have absolutely
no fucking leverage
because I am the Homelander.
And I really can do
whatever the fuck I want.
- [door opens]
- [kissing, moaning]
[Deep] Okay.
- Okay, so tomorrow
- Uh-huh.
you have the
"Recontextualizing Feminism" panel
with Rose McGowan and Alyssa Milano.
Ooh, I love Charmed.
- Hey, babe, I'm serious.
- Yeah?
- We need to cover your ass
- [grunts]
in case that bitch Starlight
comes after you again.
Thanks, babe. I couldn't
have done this without you.
You're telling me.
[grunts]
- [both breathing heavily]
- [Deep] Yeah.
[both moaning]
Oh, yeah?
- Yeah, you like that?
- Oh, fuck yeah.
Oh, yeah.
[Deep] Oh, God.
- You're so fucking wet.
- Oh, it's all you, baby. It's all you.
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
What are you gonna do?
Gonna jerk me off with all your arms?
All my arms?
Yeah. [grunting]
[retching]
[spits]
[sniffles]
[knocking]
[Ryan] Butcher, are you okay?
Yeah, mate. It's all good.
Just give us a minute, yeah?
[Ryan] Do you need any help?
Don't come in.
[cell phone ringing]
- Hey, Annie.
- Homelander's had a breakdown.
He's lost his fucking mind.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Slow down, slow down. What?
He's bringing the Deep
back into The Seven,
so I brought up the video,
and he said to go ahead
and release it. You were right.
Cocaptain was a bad idea.
I have to leave.
Look, I-I know I should tell you
to run out of there like a house on fire,
and I want to
[sighs]but you got to stick it out.
I'm sorry?
Listen, I'm-I'm-I'm back with Butcher.
Why?
We're onto something
that could kill Homelander.
What? What is it?
Some kind of weapon. Uh
I'm not sure,
but you got to buy us some time.
Keep your eyes on him.
How much time?
Uh
You don't know.
So, for God knows how long,
I have to paste on a smile,
with Homelander growing more unstable
by the hour,
hoping that he doesn't kill me or worse.
If that's what it takes, then yeah.
[sighs] I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Just
Homelander and-and Vicky,
they-they're running laps around us
because because we keep trying
to do it the right way.
The high road just doesn't work.
W-We have to be as mean
and fucked-up as they are.
- Now you sound like
- Like Butcher, I know,
but, Annie, he's he's right.
He's been right all along.
I'm just so tired of losing.
[sighs]
Okay.
You better pull this off, Hughie, but
okay.
[phone beeps]
I used to destroy you in slapsies.
You had super speed.
Ow!
- [laughs]
- Khamari.
Put another hand on your brother,
you see what happens.
Hey, Uncle Reg, what's up with that suit?
- Oh, you like it, huh?
- That shit's corny.
Hey, Khamari, that's not
how you talk to your uncle.
[A-Train] Nah, it's-it's all right.
Young men just don't understand
the history.
[Arana] Oh, no, the suit's ridiculous.
But he shouldn't be using
that kind of language.
All right, inside. Both y'all.
All right? And wash your hands.
For real this time.
I didn't want to say nothing, but
Just trying to show the community
I'm down for the cause.
[laughs] Since when you been
down with any cause?
Come on, man.
I mean, I can't run, I can't do shit.
So I got to rebrand.
Stay in the game somehow.
Or you don't. You could just be
my pain-in-the-ass little brother Reg.
Yeah.
Let me tell you, man,
I'm happier coaching these kids
than I ever was working at Vought.
You should come down to the track.
They'd love to see you.
Yeah.
Okay.
Since you want to be down
with the cause so much
Hmm?
I was walking home,
and this mugger came up behind me.
I was terrified.
[newsperson] And that's when
Dana Whitmyre says Blue Hawk
came to her rescue.
[Blue Hawk] At approximately 7:15 p.m.,
I spotted a Black male
following the victim
southbound on Marin Boulevard.
I intercepted him, at which point
the suspect became aggressive.
Brother lived a few houses up the street.
Three kids.
He was just walking home from work.
Blue Hawk curb-stomped him so hard,
it cracked the pavement.
- That's fucked-up.
- Yeah.
Maybe I can throw his family
some cash or something.
They don't need a handout.
They need you to speak up.
You're in The motherfucking Seven.
Yeah, but, I mean [chuckles]
I Listen, I'm Michael Jordan.
I'm not Malcolm X.
Everybody loves the A-Train, right?
[Yevgenny] Sergei.
- Nina wants to see you.
- [Frenchie] Yevgenny.
How's your wife?
She still enjoy getting
her salad tossed by a Frenchman
while her husband tosses nothing?
Another time.
[Yevgenny] Get in.
- [grunting, breathing sharply]
- [sizzling]
Come on. Fucking knock it off.
[exhales]
All right, mate?
- Are you sick?
- No, no.
I had a dodgy kebab, didn't I?
Went straight through me.
Try these.
Well, I'll be.
[chuckles] Your mum used to give me these
when I was under the weather.
[chuckles] Same.
- I hated them.
- I used to crush them up
and put them in the bird feeder
when she wasn't looking.
Well, I don't blame you.
They done off leave your mouth
drier than a nun's
You were gonna say "vagina."
Yeah. Something like that.
[laughs]
It's not just your stomach, though.
Your heart's racing. I can hear it.
And your blood smells funny, too.
Don't you worry, son.
Nothing a good night's kip won't sort.
[Butcher] Sorry about that.
What the hell did you drink last night?
Right.
Where were we?
To the surprise of no one,
that moron Swatto
went for another joy flight,
giving away our position.
Even better, the Sandinistas
brought Russian special forces with them.
Though that didn't matter much
to the Supes.
Those are my men!
[soldiers screaming]
[gunfire]
[shouts]
[soldiers shouting indistinctly]
[soldier] You, stay with me! Go!
[explosion]
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
[buzzing]
[grunting]
[soldier screams]
[gunfire]
Oh, yeah!
Gunpowder! Will you please fucking stop?
[yelps]
[exhales]
[fire crackling]
[sniffles]
[Black Noir coughs]
[Black Noir grunting, gasping]
[Tessa crying]
[Crimson Countess] Oh, God.
They killed Soldier Boy.
- What? Who?
- The Russians.
They had some kind of gun
or-or weapon or something.
- That's impossible.
- No!
- We saw it. We saw it.
- [helicopter whirring]
They took his body.
[Mallory] I lost 116 men.
And Vought got full immunity.
That was the day
I decided to make them pay.
Well, ain't that a wonderful story.
Tell me, Grace,
where did the Ivans take this
Supe gun?
The trail went cold
behind the iron curtain.
It's the truth.
My reach only goes so far.
You knew what Soldier Boy did
to my family,
but you didn't think
I needed to know the truth?
It wasn't that simple.
Marvin, Hugh, give us the room.
You came to me after Becca disappeared
and promised me Homelander's head.
And all this time,
you knew there was something
that could do the job,
and you never said a fucking word.
Whatever this weapon is,
it probably won't work on Homelander.
- And what if it does?
- Even worse.
Because it wouldn't end with him.
You'd go after another Supe,
then another, then all of them.
If you'd have told me about this sooner,
Homelander might already be dead.
Ryan wouldn't be running
from one safe house to the next,
wondering when his nutter dad's
gonna drop out of the sky.
And Becca
Becca might still be alive.
And for that
I'll never fucking forgive you.
This was never about Ryan or Becca.
It was always selfish.
Always and only for you.
For the hate inside
that you want to let loose on the world.
I thought maybe you changed,
but I was wrong.
You are your father.
Always have been.
- What happened?
- We're off.
Butcher, wait up.
Where-where are you going?
- The city.
- When will I see you again?
You won't. Ain't safe for you.
Wait!
- What are you talking about?
- I got to go.
- Ryan, let go.
- No.
You said you'd always watch out for me.
- You promised!
- Ryan, let go.
- I won't let you!
- Well, maybe I don't want to look at you.
After what you done to my Becca.
Did you ever think about that?
[Ryan breathing shakily]
I hate you.
[scoffs]
[announcer speaking Russian on TV]
[footsteps approaching]
Sorry if Yevgenny got a little rough.
He's still a bit bitter
you ate his wife's anus.
[lighter clicks]
Why am I here, Nina?
Do you remember Mikhail Petrov?
You wait for him to come home.
He step out of his minivan.
You attack. He knocks the blade
from your hand,
so you slam this Honda Odyssey
minivan sliding doors
on his neck over and over
until he's [inhales deeply]
decapitated.
Art. Who can define it?
Then you discovered his young bride
in the passenger seat,
and my Sergei
does not leave a witness behind.
Where is Cherie?
I don't know.
[grunts softly]
She had a place in Bayonne
last time I saw her.
Why?
'Cause nobody stole heroin from her.
She stole it from me.
I will give her a quick death, pazhalsta,
and I will make this worth your while.
I don't do that shit anymore.
Nobody changes, hmm?
What was your safe word again?
When I used the dog collar
and the strap-on? What was it?
Vincent Cassel.
You are like rabid little doggy
but loyal to whoever holds this chain.
Before William Butcher, it was me.
Before me, it was your daddy.
But you always heel, Sergei.
Not Sergei.
Serge.
And that was a long time ago.
Who I am now is someone
who works for the CIA, Nina.
So unless you want the full weight
of the government up your ass
I'm leaving.
We both have had bigger things
than the government up our asses.
Just think about my offer.
Go on, scamper away, little doggy.
[electronic bell chimes]
- Deep, welcome home, brother.
- [Ashley] Hear! Hear!
Oh, thanks, Homelander.
- This literally means everything to me.
- [Homelander chuckles]
- To us.
- [Deep] To us.
[Homelander] Ah! Here we are.
- Ooh.
- Excellent.
Okay, so, I took the liberty
of ordering for all of us,
but I'm pretty sure
you're gonna love my selection. Okay?
[chuckles]
- Thank you, gentlemen.
- Yes, sir.
[Homelander] Mmm.
Could I just get some some bread?
[Homelander] Come on, now.
You're back in the big leagues, buddy.
Nothing but the best for you.
[Deep grunts softly]
I'm so hungry. [slurps]
[Homelander] Know who
I've been reading up on lately?
Dr. Martin Luther King.
Well, my relationship with King
has deepened of late.
He was, uh, villainized.
Persecuted. Spoke truth to power.
Just like me. It's crazy. But
we've both been to the mountaintop,
and we've seen the promised land.
I showed people the real me,
and they loved me for it.
[laughs] I mean, they fucking loved me.
[chuckles]
If only I'd known that sooner.
[exhales] There's always been
so, so many things I want to do,
and now I can do them all, finally.
And no one can stop me.
Nobody.
Free at last.
Free at last.
Oh! Excellent.
- Deep, that's for you, big guy.
- Me?
- Thank you, sir.
- Mm-hmm.
Wonderful.
Chef's specialty.
It is a South Korean delicacy.
[gasps] Holy shit, it's Timothy.
Oh, my God.
That's Timoth He's my friend.
I, uh, I can't eat him.
I'm not gonna eat him. I can't
- Oh, yes, you can, Deep.
- No, I'm not gonna
Timothy is fucking delicious.
[grunts]
He's-he's-he's begging for his life.
He has kids.
[cell phone whooshes]
- He has kids.
- [cell phone vibrates]
- Hey, Deep?
- What?
Eat fucking Timothy.
[gulps]
[grunting quietly]
I'm so sorry.
He's praying. He's praying.
- [gags]
- [Homelander] Mmm.
[swallows, grunts]
Wasn't that delicious?
[laughs softly]
- Come on. [mutters]
- [door opens]
Monsieur Charcutier?
You work for him, too.
Wouldn't that be nice, huh?
[door opens]
All right, let's have it.
Where the fuck you been all day?
I was, uh, detained by Little Nina.
Little Nina?
And what does that Russian slag
want with you?
It's a long story.
Hang about.
This is a fucking gold mine, Frenchie.
Set up a meeting
with you, me and Little Nina.
No, no, no. This is a very,
is a very bad idea.
No, Frenchie,
it's a very fucking good idea.
Go on. Get on the phone,
give her a call right now.
Oui, monsieur.
And what are we doing this for?
'Cause, my son, we're going to Russia.
[knocking]
- Hey. Do you have a sec?
- Hey. Hey.
Yeah, yeah. Come in.
Thanks. Um
So I went to talk to the producers,
to tell them that I had a family emergency
and I have to bow out.
Good. That's That's really good.
But, uh, you know, when I got there, I
I told them I was thrilled
to join the team.
No. Alex, Alex, that's that's a mistake.
I was in rehab, would've
killed my mother for some oxy.
Manager bailed on me, Vought, everyone.
But you didn't leave.
So do you really think
I'm gonna bail on you now?
I'm an asshole, but I'm not
that much of an asshole.
Are you sure?
[sighs]
Someone's got to have your back.
Come on, then.
Let's hear it.
I'm a fucking monster
for what I done to the kid.
No.
The others don't get it, but I-I do.
The gloves are off.
If there's anything that I've learned
[Butcher gagging]
[panting]
What the fuck?
[dramatic music playing]
Well, this has been
quite a long road for all of you.
You've shown us the best
of what heroes can be.
[Starlight]
The first of the two selections,
and the newest member of The Seven is
Supersonic.
You can be my favorite girl ♪
And you can rock my world ♪
I never felt like this ♪
Thank you.
Welcome.
Thank you, sir.
[speaking Spanish]
[Homelander chuckles]
[pats shoulder]
Rock my kiss ♪
Well this is it.
The final new member of The Seven is
[dramatic music playing]
Lord of the Seven Seas, the Deep.
[Deep laughs]
- [Homelander] Get up here, you.
- All right.
[Homelander] Welcome back.
Thank you, sir.
- Good to see you.
- You, too.
- Congratulations, bro.
- You, too.
All right, well, unfortunately,
it won't be either of you two.
I'm sure you understand,
you just can't put a price on experience.
Please hang up your capes and go.
Now, Deep, I got to say, I am, uh
Well, frankly, I'm moved and inspired
that Starlight here
has chosen to forgive you.
I accept your apology, Deep.
You deserve a second chance.
Thank you, Starlight.
Looks like we've all grown.
[Homelander] Just to be clear,
it wasn't my idea
to bring you back, buster.
Not at all. Starlight here insisted on it.
But you keep your distance, pal,
because, uh, well
[laughs]she's my girl now.
[laughs softly]
Sorry, I-I can't keep it a secret anymore.
It's time we let the world know.
Starlight and I are in love.
#HomeLight.
- Cut! Incredible.
- Huh?
- That fucking plays, man.
- Oh, my God!
That plays like hell.
- That was perfect. Yeah, yeah.
- People are gonna love it.
[Seth laughing] Incredible! Yes!
[audio distorting]
Okay, that was perfect, uh,
but, Starlight,
I need you to be not so shocked.
[echoing] All right, well,
uh, let's go again.
[Ashley] Starlight?
We good?
[crew] We ready?
Yeah. Let's, uh, let's go again.
- Okay. Going again.
- Yeah, one more. Great.
[Seth] Uh, take it
from your line, Homelander.
- [Homelander] You got it. All right.
- [bell rings]
- That a girl.
- And action.
[whispering] I just can't
keep it a secret anymore.
- Hmm.
- Come on, it's time we let the world know.
Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
[normal volume] Um, everybody,
Starlight and I are in love.
[chuckles] #HomeLight.
- [gasping]
- ["Baby One More Time" plays]
Oh, baby, baby ♪
Oh, baby, baby ♪
How was I supposed to know ♪
That something wasn't right here? ♪
My loneliness is killing me ♪
And I ♪
I must confess, I still believe ♪
Still believe ♪
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind ♪
Give me a sign ♪
Hit me, baby, one more time ♪
[rock music playing]
[music ends]