What I Like About You (2002) s03e03 Episode Script
The Not So Simple Life
All right, singing his latest hit, "Beautiful Soul," put your hands together for Jesse McCartney! [ cheers and applause .]
I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul Oh! Man, this is great! I told you so.
Come on.
There were, like, How'd you get us in? Well, I gave that big bouncer my number.
And so, why did they let me in? Well, I gave that little one yours.
Man, this is awesome.
Hey, maybe that'll be me up there someday.
No "maybe," it will.
Oh, you have to give me your CD.
I wanna give it to the owner.
Holly, I already mailed it to him.
I'm sure first chance he gets he'll listen to it, - and he'll call me.
- Oh, that's sweet.
Did you mail your letter to Santa yet? Come on.
Oh, there's the owner.
I'll show you how it's done.
No, wait! Holly, what are you doing? Eh, eh, eh! Hey, does this look like monkeypox? Holly, come back.
Holly! Excuse me, sir, if I could have a -- Hey, the guy I'm with thinks you're hot.
Another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I won't let another minute go to waste So, uh, how come you haven't called? What I like about you You really know how to dance When you go up, down, jump around Talk about true romance Yeah Keep on whispering in my ear Tell me all the things that I wanna hear 'Cause it's true What I like That's what I like about you What I like That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about Hey Uh-huh Uh-huh That's what I like about you You haven't stopped yelling at me the whole way home.
I'm sorry, I was just trying to help you.
And by the way, that accent is way less cute when you're screaming.
Holly, I appreciate you trying to help me, but you're a little pushy, and that's just not the way I do things.
Holly, get up! You're gonna be late for college registration! Uh, never mind, you're just getting home.
Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get going.
Wait! We have not finished our fight! Oh, all right.
Uh, you were wrong.
You're sorry about butting into my career, and you'll never do it again, sorry.
Wait! No! You were wrong.
You're sorry.
Ugh, I don't like fighting with Europeans.
Rick's on his way over to talk about wedding plans.
Ooh, without Lauren? Okay, look, I am sorry her wedding didn't happen, but she won't let me plan anything.
It's gotta be her menu, her florist, her song.
And I'm sorry, but I am not walking down the aisle to Barry Manilow's "It's a Miracle.
" So, why don't you tell her? You know I'm not a good confronter.
Just talking about confronting makes me uncomfortable.
Well, you want me to tell her? Because apparently, I'm a pushy biatch.
No, no.
You know what? I'm gonna do it.
II'm gonna do it.
I don't wanna wuss out.
Okay, yeah, right.
No, I'm serious, when I see Lauren, I am just gonna look at her and I'm -- Well, look who's here early when they were supposed to be getting a three-hour massage.
Oh, yeah, I didn't go.
I was too tense planning my wedding.
Listen to me -- "my wedding.
" Okay, so, I had a vision about the centerpieces -- romance through the ages.
I'm seeing big cutouts of Romeo and Juliet, Anthony and Cleopatra, and at the head table, Ross and Rachel.
Ooh, what do you think about that, Val? Tell Lauren what you think about that.
Okay! Lauren, look, about these cutouts, um, I just don't like -- I just don't like that I didn't think of them first! Good job.
Okay, so, Lauren, isn't it true at your wedding you were gonna be lowered from the ceiling on a heart? Hey, don't you have to go take a shower, pushy biatch? Yes, and I need money for school books, wussy biatch.
I'm just gonna go get my checkbook.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Is Val around? - Yeah, she's upstairs.
Okay, then we don't have much time.
Look, I really need you -- Ha! Oh, God! Well, I knew this was gonna happen.
Let me make it very clear, mister.
You and I aren't, okay? Val is my best friend, and, honey, mama don't play that game.
Yeah, uh, Lauren, I was just gonna ask you to help me pick out Val's engagement ring.
Yeah, I know, but mama don't got no life.
Now, this one says, "Fat or bald, you're gettin' lucky.
" I'm not sure it's Val.
Maybe I should keep looking.
Hello.
Oh, hi.
I'm sorry for staring, it's just -- My therapist says there's something wrong with me because I only fall for married women.
Oh, how unfortunate for my husband.
I'm Todd.
I'm Lauren.
Mrs.
Lauren.
Mrs.
Ralph Lauren.
How long have you and your husband been married? That's hot.
Oh, God.
Are you sure that's the right one? Oh, it is just perfect.
You're only the best husband ever, Mr.
Ralph Lauren.
Oh, look what he's doing! Yeah, he's having your breakfast.
I hate that guy.
I hate that he's with her.
I hate that he's living with me.
I hate that I'm turning into a chick.
Turning? Man, if I have to hear you cry yourself to sleep one more night, I'm gonna buy you some panties.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hi, guys.
All right, well, I'm gonna go.
I need to get some more CDs in the mail.
But if we're gonna start making up like this, then I see another fight coming on.
I'll see you later, mate.
So, what are you guys fighting about? Gary wants to know.
Well, Ben and I went to, like, 20 clubs trying to get his CD heard, but nobody would listen.
Why? Is it that bad? No, it's awesome, but Ben has his own way of doing things.
Wait, did you guys go to Skids? I know the owner.
You do? Yeah, me and Omar used to be real cool.
I can give him Ben's CD for you.
Oh, well, isn't that nice of Gary, helping out my ex-girlfriend's boyfriend.
What a good guy.
Ow.
That's perfect.
Okay, so all you have to do is get me in to see Omar, and then I'll bring him a CD.
Wait, what am I doing? I just promised Ben I wouldn't do that.
I can't do that.
I won't do that.
Look at what you're doing.
I was just sitting there innocently, and then you told me you knew the owner of a club.
What was I to do? Wow, how can such a little girl be full of so much crap? Oh, look, there's the owner.
Introduce me, and then step aside.
- Step aside? - Yeah, Gary, please.
Ben and I have been to, like, I know how to speak the language.
Omar, what's up, dog? - How you doing? - Pretty good.
Hey, listen, I want you to meet a friend of mine.
This is Holly Tyler.
Yo, dog, Holly-T in the heezy.
Groovy, another white girl from the suburbs in the heezy.
Listen, Omar, merry Christmas, I just brought you a present.
His name is Ben Sheffield.
- Gary? - He's good.
Okay, Tuesday night I try out new talent.
$500.
He won't do it for less than $600.
Gary.
Look, Holly, he's not gonna pay Ben.
He wants you to pay him $500.
Ha ha ha.
Why would I pay you to have my talent sing here? Okay, first of all, personal space.
Second of all, the $500 is a deposit.
If you get 50 people in here at $10 a head, you get your $500 back.
But then Ben makes nothing.
This is me caring.
Well, I'm not interested.
Holly, he's not coming after you.
In that case, I will take that nothing, and pay you $500.
You don't have $500.
But I do have a blank check from my sister for school books.
Aww, sookie, sookie now.
[ knock on door .]
- I'll get it! - No, no, no, I wanna get it! I wanna get it.
It's for me.
It's for me.
It's for me.
It's for me.
I bet it's Ben with good news.
- I've got good news! - I knew it! You won't believe it.
The owner of Skids called.
He got my CD in the mail, and he booked me on -- - Tuesday night? - Yes, how did you know that? Because Tuesday's the best night! Yay! Oh! Oh, my God, isn't he amazing? You guys have to come.
But I mean, seriously, you have to come, and if you could bring, like, everybody you've ever met? I can bring Todd.
Who's Todd? Todd is this fabulous guy I met who only dates married women.
I'm cheating on my husband with him.
Lauren, you're not married.
Now, there's a sentence I don't hear enough.
[ cellular phone rings .]
Ooh, it's Todd, my twisted lover.
Rick, hi.
Yes, everything is taken care of.
The ring is sized, and I hid it in the perfect place.
Aah! I found the ring! Okay, bye-bye now.
Oh, my God, that must be the engagement ring.
I know, but why would he hide it in such a stupid place? Well, maybe he thought it was a clever place.
Maybe he thought, what bride would be stupid enough to raid a cookie jar two months before her wedding? Okay, let me see it.
Let me see.
No, no, no.
I can't open it.
Yeah, you can.
It's easy.
Open.
- Okay.
- Yay! No, no, no, no.
I'm sorry, but I wouldn't want to miss the look on my fiancée's face the first time she saw the ring.
Ben's right.
Yeah, Ben's foreign.
Open that mother.
Okay! Oh, my God it's it's [ Both .]
: Hideous.
It's like a car wreck.
We should just walk away.
I don't get it.
This does not look like something Rick would pick out.
Well, it's a classic.
Maybe you are just not learned in fine jewelry.
Why are you defending it? It's not like you picked it out.
Oh, sweet Jesus, you picked it out? Why would Rick ask you to pick out my ring? Well, you know, look at me.
Yeah, look at ya.
What's that supposed to mean? Well, it just means we kinda have different tastes.
Yeah, mine's good, yours sucks.
Ha ha, that's so funny 'cause I was thinking the same thing, only opposite.
Oh, really, then why'd you ask me to help you plan your wedding in the first place? I didn't ask you! Then what were you planning on doing in this thing, catching killer bees maybe? I love this veil.
This is the veil I wanna wear at my wedding.
I didn't ask you for your help.
I don't want your invitations, I don't want your color scheme, and nobody wants a hummus bar.
Well, everyone loves a hummus bar.
Maybe in Beirut! How brilliant is this? A sound check at a real club.
How do I look up here? You're boring the audience.
Let's go.
Right, sorry.
Check one, two.
Hello, America-ca-ca I'm just practicing in case I get a stadium gig.
Yeah, don't do that.
Hey, listen, he's like that with all of his new acts, but he's a good guy.
And, hey, if he thinks you have potential, maybe next time you won't have to pay to play.
Pay to play? No, he's a crazy rock star, probably on drugs.
Let's go.
No one paid for me to play here.
I sent my CD to Omar, and he booked me 'cause he had an opening.
Dude, everybody pays to play here.
Uh, can I have another photo because I feel this will be the last time that I ever see you.
You paid for me to get this gig, didn't you? Ben, look, I know that you wanted the universe to book you, but the universe didn't have $500 to give Omar, and I did.
You paid for me to get this gig? Well, I was just trying to help you.
You don't think I can do it on my own? Of course I do! This is just how it works in the music business.
Stop telling me how it works in the music business.
You don't know anything about it.
Well, I do know that if it weren't for me, you wouldn't be singing here.
Well, guess what? I'm not.
Does this mean you're free for dinner? Or a movie? I can get into "R" now.
But I gotta tell ya, I think you refusing to play is such the way to go.
Well, I don't.
You know, if you don't play, Holly's gonna lose 500 bucks.
So what? She shouldn't have pushed him when he specifically asked her not to.
But, dude, that's the beauty of Holly.
And when she's too pushy, it's because she wants something good to happen.
Why do you think she's pushing you? She wants you to have success, man.
And who's the one who pushed you into finally feeling something for somebody else? And, hell, she pushed me into buying these pants, which got me a date with a salesgirl.
And last night, I got my inseam measured.
Twice.
You know what, man, Gary's right.
You're lucky she cares enough to push you.
I wish I had somebody like that.
Hey, you wanna know where I got my pants? I'm gonna tell you something you're not gonna like.
I spent the money you gave me for books to help Ben get a gig at a club.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
Oh, Holly, I gave you a blank check.
How much, Holly? How much? This isn't about numbers, Val.
The point is, I was wrong and I'm sorry.
I'll never do it again.
$500.
$500? Yeah, and I need another check for books.
Ha ha.
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, and you are going to juvie.
Val, yeah, I know I did a horrible thing.
But you don't understand, I did it for Ben.
That makes it so much better.
Come on, Val, haven't you ever done something stupid for love? Well, look, you're willing to wear big ugly for Rick.
Look, I'm sorry that your money is gone.
I tried to get it back from the owner, but he's a sleazy music guy.
They prey on kids like me.
Well, he's never negotiated with Val Tyler.
Don't forget, kid, I own my own business.
Come Tuesday, I'll show you I don't take "no" for an answer.
No, no, no, no.
- Please.
- No.
If there is no entertainment on stage, you are not getting one penny of your money back.
How the hell am I supposed to get entertainment here in the next five minutes? What? I brought our costumes.
Our costumes? Oh, no, no! Unh-unh, no.
You manipulated me to get me to come down here and go up on stage and perform.
Val, what am I supposed to do? Plus, you have the prettiest voice and the sexiest moves.
Well, that's the yoga.
Come on, it's only five minutes.
No, no.
There is not enough alcohol in New York City to make me get up there onstage dressed as Posh Spice.
No, I'm Posh.
You're Sporty.
Hey, isn't that your husband? Oh, uh, yes.
Yes, it is.
- Well, does he think we're, uh - Oh, no, it's okay.
I told him we're business acquaintances.
That's hot.
Ben.
I have to talk to you.
What are you doing here? My girlfriend got me a gig here.
So, you still have a girlfriend? Yeah, if I'm lucky.
Here, sit down.
Listen, I was talking to Gary and Vince, you know, about the whole pushiness, and we all decided that -- that it's a good thing.
Really? Yes! Holly, I've been an idiot.
No, I was the idiot.
You told me to back off, and I didn't.
But I was just freaking out.
No, I was freaking out.
I mean, I came here without a job.
I know, and I think that's why I was pushing you.
I was afraid that if you didn't get a job, then you'd leave.
Or worse, then you'd stay.
Why would that be worse? Because if you stayed and didn't get a job then you'd only be here for me.
That's a lot of pressure, and I don't know if I'm worth it.
You are definitely worth it.
And, hey, I'm not going anywhere.
[ music plays .]
Oh, I gotta go.
My pushy girlfriend paid 500 bucks to hear me sing this song.
Wait, wait.
That's not our intro music.
Oh, Val, I don't think we have to do it anymore.
What? I'm all stretched out here.
Aww, don't worry, we were never really that good.
Um, Holly, help me.
Let's just take our time There's nothing else to do What better way to spend the night Wasting it with you The moon has won the war Val, there's something I wanna give to you.
Oh, God.
Hon, can I get a gimlet? Hey, who is that with your husband? Uh, his sister.
Rick, it's just I've really gotten used to the -- Wh -- This is not the -- This ring is beautiful.
Hey, your husband's making out with his sister.
And you think you've got problems.
And found The better part of me Yeah, yeah I need you Now and forever To stay right here with me Don't ever leave Love was kept From me like a secret And I swore that I was blue Until you
I don't want another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul Oh! Man, this is great! I told you so.
Come on.
There were, like, How'd you get us in? Well, I gave that big bouncer my number.
And so, why did they let me in? Well, I gave that little one yours.
Man, this is awesome.
Hey, maybe that'll be me up there someday.
No "maybe," it will.
Oh, you have to give me your CD.
I wanna give it to the owner.
Holly, I already mailed it to him.
I'm sure first chance he gets he'll listen to it, - and he'll call me.
- Oh, that's sweet.
Did you mail your letter to Santa yet? Come on.
Oh, there's the owner.
I'll show you how it's done.
No, wait! Holly, what are you doing? Eh, eh, eh! Hey, does this look like monkeypox? Holly, come back.
Holly! Excuse me, sir, if I could have a -- Hey, the guy I'm with thinks you're hot.
Another pretty face I don't want just anyone to hold I don't want my love to go to waste I want you and your beautiful soul You're the one I wanna chase You're the one I wanna hold I won't let another minute go to waste So, uh, how come you haven't called? What I like about you You really know how to dance When you go up, down, jump around Talk about true romance Yeah Keep on whispering in my ear Tell me all the things that I wanna hear 'Cause it's true What I like That's what I like about you What I like That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about you What I like about you That's what I like about Hey Uh-huh Uh-huh That's what I like about you You haven't stopped yelling at me the whole way home.
I'm sorry, I was just trying to help you.
And by the way, that accent is way less cute when you're screaming.
Holly, I appreciate you trying to help me, but you're a little pushy, and that's just not the way I do things.
Holly, get up! You're gonna be late for college registration! Uh, never mind, you're just getting home.
Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get going.
Wait! We have not finished our fight! Oh, all right.
Uh, you were wrong.
You're sorry about butting into my career, and you'll never do it again, sorry.
Wait! No! You were wrong.
You're sorry.
Ugh, I don't like fighting with Europeans.
Rick's on his way over to talk about wedding plans.
Ooh, without Lauren? Okay, look, I am sorry her wedding didn't happen, but she won't let me plan anything.
It's gotta be her menu, her florist, her song.
And I'm sorry, but I am not walking down the aisle to Barry Manilow's "It's a Miracle.
" So, why don't you tell her? You know I'm not a good confronter.
Just talking about confronting makes me uncomfortable.
Well, you want me to tell her? Because apparently, I'm a pushy biatch.
No, no.
You know what? I'm gonna do it.
II'm gonna do it.
I don't wanna wuss out.
Okay, yeah, right.
No, I'm serious, when I see Lauren, I am just gonna look at her and I'm -- Well, look who's here early when they were supposed to be getting a three-hour massage.
Oh, yeah, I didn't go.
I was too tense planning my wedding.
Listen to me -- "my wedding.
" Okay, so, I had a vision about the centerpieces -- romance through the ages.
I'm seeing big cutouts of Romeo and Juliet, Anthony and Cleopatra, and at the head table, Ross and Rachel.
Ooh, what do you think about that, Val? Tell Lauren what you think about that.
Okay! Lauren, look, about these cutouts, um, I just don't like -- I just don't like that I didn't think of them first! Good job.
Okay, so, Lauren, isn't it true at your wedding you were gonna be lowered from the ceiling on a heart? Hey, don't you have to go take a shower, pushy biatch? Yes, and I need money for school books, wussy biatch.
I'm just gonna go get my checkbook.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Is Val around? - Yeah, she's upstairs.
Okay, then we don't have much time.
Look, I really need you -- Ha! Oh, God! Well, I knew this was gonna happen.
Let me make it very clear, mister.
You and I aren't, okay? Val is my best friend, and, honey, mama don't play that game.
Yeah, uh, Lauren, I was just gonna ask you to help me pick out Val's engagement ring.
Yeah, I know, but mama don't got no life.
Now, this one says, "Fat or bald, you're gettin' lucky.
" I'm not sure it's Val.
Maybe I should keep looking.
Hello.
Oh, hi.
I'm sorry for staring, it's just -- My therapist says there's something wrong with me because I only fall for married women.
Oh, how unfortunate for my husband.
I'm Todd.
I'm Lauren.
Mrs.
Lauren.
Mrs.
Ralph Lauren.
How long have you and your husband been married? That's hot.
Oh, God.
Are you sure that's the right one? Oh, it is just perfect.
You're only the best husband ever, Mr.
Ralph Lauren.
Oh, look what he's doing! Yeah, he's having your breakfast.
I hate that guy.
I hate that he's with her.
I hate that he's living with me.
I hate that I'm turning into a chick.
Turning? Man, if I have to hear you cry yourself to sleep one more night, I'm gonna buy you some panties.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hi, guys.
All right, well, I'm gonna go.
I need to get some more CDs in the mail.
But if we're gonna start making up like this, then I see another fight coming on.
I'll see you later, mate.
So, what are you guys fighting about? Gary wants to know.
Well, Ben and I went to, like, 20 clubs trying to get his CD heard, but nobody would listen.
Why? Is it that bad? No, it's awesome, but Ben has his own way of doing things.
Wait, did you guys go to Skids? I know the owner.
You do? Yeah, me and Omar used to be real cool.
I can give him Ben's CD for you.
Oh, well, isn't that nice of Gary, helping out my ex-girlfriend's boyfriend.
What a good guy.
Ow.
That's perfect.
Okay, so all you have to do is get me in to see Omar, and then I'll bring him a CD.
Wait, what am I doing? I just promised Ben I wouldn't do that.
I can't do that.
I won't do that.
Look at what you're doing.
I was just sitting there innocently, and then you told me you knew the owner of a club.
What was I to do? Wow, how can such a little girl be full of so much crap? Oh, look, there's the owner.
Introduce me, and then step aside.
- Step aside? - Yeah, Gary, please.
Ben and I have been to, like, I know how to speak the language.
Omar, what's up, dog? - How you doing? - Pretty good.
Hey, listen, I want you to meet a friend of mine.
This is Holly Tyler.
Yo, dog, Holly-T in the heezy.
Groovy, another white girl from the suburbs in the heezy.
Listen, Omar, merry Christmas, I just brought you a present.
His name is Ben Sheffield.
- Gary? - He's good.
Okay, Tuesday night I try out new talent.
$500.
He won't do it for less than $600.
Gary.
Look, Holly, he's not gonna pay Ben.
He wants you to pay him $500.
Ha ha ha.
Why would I pay you to have my talent sing here? Okay, first of all, personal space.
Second of all, the $500 is a deposit.
If you get 50 people in here at $10 a head, you get your $500 back.
But then Ben makes nothing.
This is me caring.
Well, I'm not interested.
Holly, he's not coming after you.
In that case, I will take that nothing, and pay you $500.
You don't have $500.
But I do have a blank check from my sister for school books.
Aww, sookie, sookie now.
[ knock on door .]
- I'll get it! - No, no, no, I wanna get it! I wanna get it.
It's for me.
It's for me.
It's for me.
It's for me.
I bet it's Ben with good news.
- I've got good news! - I knew it! You won't believe it.
The owner of Skids called.
He got my CD in the mail, and he booked me on -- - Tuesday night? - Yes, how did you know that? Because Tuesday's the best night! Yay! Oh! Oh, my God, isn't he amazing? You guys have to come.
But I mean, seriously, you have to come, and if you could bring, like, everybody you've ever met? I can bring Todd.
Who's Todd? Todd is this fabulous guy I met who only dates married women.
I'm cheating on my husband with him.
Lauren, you're not married.
Now, there's a sentence I don't hear enough.
[ cellular phone rings .]
Ooh, it's Todd, my twisted lover.
Rick, hi.
Yes, everything is taken care of.
The ring is sized, and I hid it in the perfect place.
Aah! I found the ring! Okay, bye-bye now.
Oh, my God, that must be the engagement ring.
I know, but why would he hide it in such a stupid place? Well, maybe he thought it was a clever place.
Maybe he thought, what bride would be stupid enough to raid a cookie jar two months before her wedding? Okay, let me see it.
Let me see.
No, no, no.
I can't open it.
Yeah, you can.
It's easy.
Open.
- Okay.
- Yay! No, no, no, no.
I'm sorry, but I wouldn't want to miss the look on my fiancée's face the first time she saw the ring.
Ben's right.
Yeah, Ben's foreign.
Open that mother.
Okay! Oh, my God it's it's [ Both .]
: Hideous.
It's like a car wreck.
We should just walk away.
I don't get it.
This does not look like something Rick would pick out.
Well, it's a classic.
Maybe you are just not learned in fine jewelry.
Why are you defending it? It's not like you picked it out.
Oh, sweet Jesus, you picked it out? Why would Rick ask you to pick out my ring? Well, you know, look at me.
Yeah, look at ya.
What's that supposed to mean? Well, it just means we kinda have different tastes.
Yeah, mine's good, yours sucks.
Ha ha, that's so funny 'cause I was thinking the same thing, only opposite.
Oh, really, then why'd you ask me to help you plan your wedding in the first place? I didn't ask you! Then what were you planning on doing in this thing, catching killer bees maybe? I love this veil.
This is the veil I wanna wear at my wedding.
I didn't ask you for your help.
I don't want your invitations, I don't want your color scheme, and nobody wants a hummus bar.
Well, everyone loves a hummus bar.
Maybe in Beirut! How brilliant is this? A sound check at a real club.
How do I look up here? You're boring the audience.
Let's go.
Right, sorry.
Check one, two.
Hello, America-ca-ca I'm just practicing in case I get a stadium gig.
Yeah, don't do that.
Hey, listen, he's like that with all of his new acts, but he's a good guy.
And, hey, if he thinks you have potential, maybe next time you won't have to pay to play.
Pay to play? No, he's a crazy rock star, probably on drugs.
Let's go.
No one paid for me to play here.
I sent my CD to Omar, and he booked me 'cause he had an opening.
Dude, everybody pays to play here.
Uh, can I have another photo because I feel this will be the last time that I ever see you.
You paid for me to get this gig, didn't you? Ben, look, I know that you wanted the universe to book you, but the universe didn't have $500 to give Omar, and I did.
You paid for me to get this gig? Well, I was just trying to help you.
You don't think I can do it on my own? Of course I do! This is just how it works in the music business.
Stop telling me how it works in the music business.
You don't know anything about it.
Well, I do know that if it weren't for me, you wouldn't be singing here.
Well, guess what? I'm not.
Does this mean you're free for dinner? Or a movie? I can get into "R" now.
But I gotta tell ya, I think you refusing to play is such the way to go.
Well, I don't.
You know, if you don't play, Holly's gonna lose 500 bucks.
So what? She shouldn't have pushed him when he specifically asked her not to.
But, dude, that's the beauty of Holly.
And when she's too pushy, it's because she wants something good to happen.
Why do you think she's pushing you? She wants you to have success, man.
And who's the one who pushed you into finally feeling something for somebody else? And, hell, she pushed me into buying these pants, which got me a date with a salesgirl.
And last night, I got my inseam measured.
Twice.
You know what, man, Gary's right.
You're lucky she cares enough to push you.
I wish I had somebody like that.
Hey, you wanna know where I got my pants? I'm gonna tell you something you're not gonna like.
I spent the money you gave me for books to help Ben get a gig at a club.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
Oh, Holly, I gave you a blank check.
How much, Holly? How much? This isn't about numbers, Val.
The point is, I was wrong and I'm sorry.
I'll never do it again.
$500.
$500? Yeah, and I need another check for books.
Ha ha.
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, and you are going to juvie.
Val, yeah, I know I did a horrible thing.
But you don't understand, I did it for Ben.
That makes it so much better.
Come on, Val, haven't you ever done something stupid for love? Well, look, you're willing to wear big ugly for Rick.
Look, I'm sorry that your money is gone.
I tried to get it back from the owner, but he's a sleazy music guy.
They prey on kids like me.
Well, he's never negotiated with Val Tyler.
Don't forget, kid, I own my own business.
Come Tuesday, I'll show you I don't take "no" for an answer.
No, no, no, no.
- Please.
- No.
If there is no entertainment on stage, you are not getting one penny of your money back.
How the hell am I supposed to get entertainment here in the next five minutes? What? I brought our costumes.
Our costumes? Oh, no, no! Unh-unh, no.
You manipulated me to get me to come down here and go up on stage and perform.
Val, what am I supposed to do? Plus, you have the prettiest voice and the sexiest moves.
Well, that's the yoga.
Come on, it's only five minutes.
No, no.
There is not enough alcohol in New York City to make me get up there onstage dressed as Posh Spice.
No, I'm Posh.
You're Sporty.
Hey, isn't that your husband? Oh, uh, yes.
Yes, it is.
- Well, does he think we're, uh - Oh, no, it's okay.
I told him we're business acquaintances.
That's hot.
Ben.
I have to talk to you.
What are you doing here? My girlfriend got me a gig here.
So, you still have a girlfriend? Yeah, if I'm lucky.
Here, sit down.
Listen, I was talking to Gary and Vince, you know, about the whole pushiness, and we all decided that -- that it's a good thing.
Really? Yes! Holly, I've been an idiot.
No, I was the idiot.
You told me to back off, and I didn't.
But I was just freaking out.
No, I was freaking out.
I mean, I came here without a job.
I know, and I think that's why I was pushing you.
I was afraid that if you didn't get a job, then you'd leave.
Or worse, then you'd stay.
Why would that be worse? Because if you stayed and didn't get a job then you'd only be here for me.
That's a lot of pressure, and I don't know if I'm worth it.
You are definitely worth it.
And, hey, I'm not going anywhere.
[ music plays .]
Oh, I gotta go.
My pushy girlfriend paid 500 bucks to hear me sing this song.
Wait, wait.
That's not our intro music.
Oh, Val, I don't think we have to do it anymore.
What? I'm all stretched out here.
Aww, don't worry, we were never really that good.
Um, Holly, help me.
Let's just take our time There's nothing else to do What better way to spend the night Wasting it with you The moon has won the war Val, there's something I wanna give to you.
Oh, God.
Hon, can I get a gimlet? Hey, who is that with your husband? Uh, his sister.
Rick, it's just I've really gotten used to the -- Wh -- This is not the -- This ring is beautiful.
Hey, your husband's making out with his sister.
And you think you've got problems.
And found The better part of me Yeah, yeah I need you Now and forever To stay right here with me Don't ever leave Love was kept From me like a secret And I swore that I was blue Until you