Deadwood s03e04 Episode Script
Full Faith And Credit
" Full Faith and Credit " Doc How you feelin'? Sleepy
As a man fuckin' should at this hour, if you don't mind me sayin' It's this hour I'm able to see to ya I understand and I'm grateful At least half that fuckin' statement's a fuckin' lie Take it easy, Doc Try and get dressed today Cheyenne and Black Hills Telegraph Company What the fuck is that to me? Telegram for Jane Cannary Oh, yeah? Well, here's a pistol for whatever your spidery fuckin' name is Please, do not kill me I'm only messenger Shut the fuck up and read the message! How'd Al answer? He didn't answer at all Good for him Mornin' Mornin' Mornin'.
Best time of day to go fuck yourself "From Samuel Fields to Miss Jane Cannary.
" I don't know any Samuel Fields Valediction is "Nigger General.
" Gimme that fuckin' thing, and keep the fuckin' contents to yourself! Trust, Gentlemen and Ladies, we live in faith! John Langrishe, Madam, wishing you good morning on an august occasion Morning Hoping to walk with you a bit.
Better to represent my intentions this day than the last All right May I ask your name? Joanie Stubbs I regret having abrupted upon you, Miss Stubbs as you gardened I took you for interested in something you mightn't have been My interest, to be direct, is in buying your building What do you want to use it for? A theater My troupe will season in this camp Well, it's a schoolhouse now And very handsomely appointed for that purpose It was a whorehouse before Anyways, I don't know if I'd want to sell Well, perhaps you'd consider renting Perhaps you'd consider fucking yourself If I was approaching you backwards, Captain, had a mirror to observe your activity, just now I'd be most trepidatious, for, Johnny, this is a man when acting from behind and advantaged with a weapon, very much to be feared Was just doing my job You don't want to speak like that again to Mr.
Hearst Yeah, I do Do you wanna try to change my fuckin' mind? Not only will I change your mind, I'll rip your whole fucking head off Another fuckin' invite Fuckin' Hearst must take me for an optimist I'm gonna kill that cocksucker All in good time I'm curious about those tables with the numbers on them Well, they're for gambling on, those Various kinds of games of chance or different sorts So I imagined I wonder if this might be convenient time for me to learn? Leon, uh, take over supervising for me while I give this young lady some private instruction Yes, sir Supervising now, Sir This over here is a choice table Horatio, beat it Am I inconveniencing you? Oh damn Chinks They shrunk these pants in the laundry You ever throw the bones before, Ma'am? I've caught some Oh these are my personal dice Nice, uh, fuckin' set I'm happy and glad to allow you to learn on 'em Damn chinks I should cut your salary 20%! Uh Based on time you're absent campaigning Can I make up the hours once I'm beat? Your plans are idiotic You're running for Sheriff to be a fireman And hope to be a second deputy in case they start a fire department Well, that's stupid and I ought to cut your salary You have to, you have to Why not build a fuckin' fire wagon that you then rent out to the camp? If I had money If you had a loan for the wagon's makings and help with the fuckin' carpentry, would you build the wagon then? Uh, I'd repay you at fuckin' interest, boss Well, that's the 20%, pre-deducted from the makings' purchase We build the fuckin' wagon then rent it to the camp And don't ever speak of this again A-a-a-and two fuckin' fire hats Nigger General ain't quit drinkin', we know that for fuckin' sure How do we know that? What you just read to me is a drunkard's question "What is state of affairs in camp with regards to the horse?" Seems to me whatever the state of affairs about the horse is in the camp, It's a drunkard's decision bringin' the cocksucker back That's on Hostetler, according to the little Nigger General, if you'd understand what you fuckin' read Hostetler means to bring the horse back Hostetler! "You're right, Jane I'm a fuckin' moron as usual What I should be doin', being as you have no experience, s helping you compose a telegraph back to little Nigger General as requested.
" Come over here and save yourself the cost of a wire Oh, fuck! What are you lookin' at, huh? think just 'cause I happen to got a peppermint, it's yours by right? Always possible I'm having a nightmare You greedy, sweet-toothed cocksucker That's right that's right You come to take my place away! Oh, Miss Stubbs Take a seat in that cell there till I square a place away for you I have an offer to sell my place How are you inclined to answer? Unless you don't yet know, if I ain't out of place askin' I told the man to fuck himself Tactics or a true position? I don't know I don't know, Mr.
Utter Why don't I close up for a while? Oh, please don't Nigger General and Hostetler brung that horse back to camp, got away from 'em and trampled the Sheriff's boy Is that so? Wherever the two of them was, I guess they didn't feel their lives were in enough danger Well, people will do strange things For years at a time Pick any part of my life, for example It just don't sit well with me To sell your place, you mean? But I can't think why I wouldn't What's wrong with whim for a reason? I'll tell you what I like What I like is knowing these children are learning I like that, and I like watering their garden the days they ain't in session The day that school opened, I remember sayin' to Sheriff Bullock what a nice thing it seemed, watching them little ones walk off to your place That's what I Goddamn like, imagining them walkin' into it I ain't seen it yet, but I'd like to, and when he wanted to buy it, all I thought's "Now I never will.
" Oh God Almighty What is it, Miss Stubbs? I wish once I could care for those little ones Just once instead of doin' what I did Walked in like the past six weeks never fuckin' happened Never fuckin' left the camp Never fuckin' abandoned the fuckin' horses to starve, or die of fuckin' thirst Nigger motherfuckers! Harry, what the fuck are you waitin' for?! What are you talking about, Steve What I swore up and down was gonna happen, and nobody paid me any heed What happened to me in Utica and every other fuckin' place I've ever been in my fuckin' life! The white man bears the nigger's weight around his neck like a fucking albatross And yet people still ask, "Well, why is he bent over?! And why can he barely fuckin' walk?!" The livery's gone All my labor, efforts are gone for naught And they walked in like they never fucking left, and they didn't take responsibility for trampling that white boy! Nor did they give less than a flyin' fuck! And I wonder what the fuckin' parents are gonna say about that too! Why don't you stand down over there, Harry? Many thanks If you stay in camp long, Sir, you may have the delightful surprise of meeting your identical twin He has appointed to degrade himself The open question is with whom Now we'll find out about you What is it? Or justice for the white man or for your own dead child At the Saloon Number fucking 10! Well, are you coming? Yeah, I'm fucking coming Mrs.
Ellsworth You don't confuse me with Mrs.
Bullock? Well, as far as the conjugal enterprise, I'll admit often feeling like a schoolboy Thank you for it Speaking further, 'twixt your mine and now this bank, however much I mayn't be good at it, I feel I married rather well I put you on notice Want my money, it better be fucking available, day or fucking night Mayn't I draw you a map then in case it's night you want it, to lead you to where I live so you can wake me? Now fuck you then I ain't depositing Oh no? Oh, say it ain't fuckin' so, you stupid fucking asshole! Now now now now Now now, fucking what?! Now now, keep your voice down Who the fuck are you anyway? Sir Stay out of this Deposits here, if we fucking let you make 'em, are backed by this lady's gold mine So do not confuse her with some paper palace fly-by-night who means "catch me if you can, turn me upside down and whatever falls out of my pants pocket is what's behind my scrip," when his note says "Full faith and credit.
" Thank you, Mr.
Ellsworth She'd make the uses of money available for people in the camp ain't belligerent cocksuckers Short of following you around with her fucking mine on her back, how else is she supposed to do it? Thank you You're welcome I am Mrs.
Ellsworth Ah How do you do? I guess I'll try you out Our hearts fucking leap with joy Keep him here Now we'll see if he takes the nigger's word or how they fucking lie Shut up! Well, give me a drink and it's a deal, Tom Go on away from here now Ain't nobody trying to keep you Yeah, that's why I come back with you, Hostetler, to worsen my chances when I try to flee I was coming to find you once I had the horse cleaned This is the horse that hurt your boy We collected him and we brung him back He died The horse escaped in my care, you may hold the boy's dying against me Hostetler took precautions We was trying to nut the horse shut up now shut up I collected the horse and brought him back I'm back too You say what you think is right I'm not gonna act against you for an accident Your boy I'm as sorry as I can be I hope you will take that to his mother for me I'm here to talk about the livery I feel sorry running away from this too It's a shame leaving animals uncared for Wanting not to be killed will put you to some difficult choices Steve's been looking after the place Did damn good at first look Any chance to keep hell from breaking loose between you? He left out of here shouting and screaming off of me saying thanks for looking out I'm asking, Hostetler, far as you go, does hell have to break loose? No, hell don't have to break loose A colleague of mine, Leon, out of the Bella Union you might not have noticed him Leon remarks to me after you left, "That young lady had a front porch on her a fella could read a book off of.
" You know Leon said that unsolicited It's time to go In a few days, we can do this again Uh, Captain will be back at the helm! Mr.
Langrishe, I couldn't possibly consider your offer unless you would agree to building a new schoolhouse at your expense for Mrs.
Bullock and the children Well, who could say no to that? Well, what what if Mrs.
Bullock doesn't want a change of location? I can't think why she'd prefer teaching in an ex-brothel over a place new-built for schooling People are strange about things, Charlie But if you like, I'll get her say-so And then I'll speak to Mr.
Langrishe Why don't' we talk at the hardware store? Why don't we talk right here? A 30-minute recess boys No recess on my account I don't want my getting' fucked to put others to inconvenience No one's here to fuck you, Steve, if you'd just quit running your mouth First off, I thank you for looking to the livery He'll talk to me through you or he won't get any fucking response I'm grateful for the care you gave the animals Now you wait until he translates from ape Don't insult him again You being this kind of neutral Sheriff is why I'm gonna vote for Harry Manning I want to pay you for your time and your trouble That's it? Send me on my fucking way? And if you wanted to work there, I would be willing to keep you on Look at him, gritting his teeth, holding onto his fucking nose! Don't you do me any fucking favors, Hostetler! I didn't ask permission of anyone to look after that stock, and I'm not gonna start with a fucking nigger! The Sheriff will have your back pay if you come to change your mind Fuck you! I was answerable to that horse that trampled his boy Camp being stirred up, if I lingered to make my arrangements I don't' think I would have lived to catch that horse Ain't that the purest form or nigger logic? He runs, he blames the white man, and then he comes back and he treats him like dirt! Hey, when can I start working for you, you fucking monkey ape?! Why don't you start jumping up and down and pounding your chest and murder a few dozen lice?! You motherfucker What did you say about my mother?! You motherfuckers What did you just say about these people! You ofay motherfuckers! Put me down until you're ready to kill me or run You're gonna leave this to me Do you understand? You leave it to me I came my part and he wouldn't meet me I'll take care of it Will you let me try? It's what I want for my son Put me down now If I do, it won't be to kill you and I'm not running So what are we gonna do then? Put me down I was gonna go to Oregon You let him buy me out fair and I'll fucking go I'll be at the livery He'll sell to you Do you want to take it on? I don't have the means to purchase it If you had the means at loan Yes, I'd be willing, very much so No bargain My partner would make the price You'd say yes or no Yeah, I'm interested, if I had the means at loan What do you think of that? Sheriff Bullock Trying to broker some settlement between Steve and Hostetler Well I'll find you later then Be quick, you got me now Must've been unwelcome to Mrs.
Bullock, that horse being brought back Not wantin' to intrude on her, Miss Stubbs was having asked me to find out, might I ask you to speak in her stead as to something I believe we both know where she stand on? Is that your Goddamn idea of quick, Charlie? Miss Stubbs, that owns the Chez Ami building where Mrs.
Bullock teaches, has got asked to name a price which she'd sell at She got stipulations and likes of which I won't bore you with, but her big worry, if the buyer on his own nickel were to put a new schoolhouse up elsewhere, would Mrs.
Bullock be loathe to leave the Chez? Why would she be loathe to leave it? Can I take that as a "no" as if from your wife's own lips? Yeah Thank you Sorry to hold you up "Be quick.
" Fucking delicate operation Jack One thought he'd engaged a room for you at the other end of the hall I'm going to it now Invites me and Tolliver for a chat What the fuck is in his head? Does he think he broke me? Does this cocksucker think he broke me and now we're at his beck and call? Oh, Jesus Christ, get your head off it Get your fucking head off it for all the fucking good you're doing down there That's all I need: At a perfect juncture you to alter your action and forget your previous method I didn't alter my action No? is my dick in your mouth? Do I have a hard-on? Then you change your action Go back to your previous fucking method Hmm Does he construe my forbearance as weakness is that what the fuck nags at me? Or my considerations of alternatives for being fucking intimidated because the time's coming he sees what I'm up to beyond any fucking mistake, and I only hope you don't doubt it Huh, you see?! Y-y-y-you don't think that counts as altering your action? You would change your entire fucking mouth pattern Sorry Sorry? Oh, I guess that's okay then because my goal before my meeting wasn't to come and clear my fucking head, not so much as to hear you say you're sorry, you stupid fucking mutt Should I go? No Tell me who you want in the election Star for Mayor and Harry Manning for Sheriff Star for Mayor and Bullock for fucking Sheriff Bullock yells at you Get out Shut up and get out Does he think I'm fucking afraid? Young man Jack Less throb today, one hopes, in the phantom digit Not to fucking mention elsewhere, huh? Might I ask you what you know of a Miss Stubbs that owns the Chez Ami? Whoremistress Not presently active, I'm told Hearst's geologist killed three of her girls The three he didn't she hid under canvas and spirited out of camp Now lets her place as a schoolhouse My impression, she donates it To cleanse the camp's idea of her? Would that base her turning away a theater type's offer to buy? Wouldn't enter into it Cares for a gut-shot shitbird no one in camp has time for, nor she has any love for either Loyal, see? That type Some sentimentality do you suppose, about the building itself? Might that account for her holding on? I wouldn't know, Jack She's all right Must think I'm a fucking dog, forgives the blow, first friendly scratch of the ear Invites me back to his rooms, fucking Hearst Shall I accompany as your second? My obvious unsuitability might confuse him Do survive E.
B The titans gather Swearengen Tolliver Do we now assault Olympus? Quiet, E.
B I think Cochran's a lunger Bit motley ourselves, huh? What would you make that livery worth? I'd have to look into it I need a figure now if you made me say without investigating Laying by for the future Very forward looking Oh, I'm keen-eyed Ahead and behind Your mark would go there I'll sign my names, Mrs.
Garret I've been lettered since I was 12 Since you can read, you may wish to examine my nameplate Mrs.
Ellsworth, I'm I'm very sorry and very very apologetic Perhaps you would finish signing over there while I tend to Mr.
Bullock Opened an account Mr.
Bullock I'd like that drunk Steve to have a loan $1200, title to the livery as collateral I'll cosign the note Has Steve clear title? He will once he's bought out Hostetler That's what the money's for What is Steve-the-Drunk's surname? Fields $1200, Trixie, payable to a Mr.
Steve Fields upon his signature and submission of title to the livery, Mr.
Bullock to cosign All right Thank you My back's in frank rebellion Uh, gentlemen, will you mind if I keep to this angles? Hang upside down from the ceiling for all of me It may come to that Mr.
Swearengen, I will take your silence for assent We pass another milestone Bank of Deadwood opens its doors Is not Mrs.
Ellsworth a dynamo? Let's find one and send it to her What's the occasion? I have my physician to see How are you indisposed, Mr.
Swearengen? Sick at the stomach Would you wish to leave now? Mr.
Tolliver can report our conversation Tough it out, Al, like me that's guts is more outside his pants than in The occasion? The camp comes to such an hour I'd have us reach a new understanding The "hour" meaning elections I am given pause by the quality of certain of the likely victors But I have come to believe as well that my temperament ill suits me for environments such as this one must become And other opportunities presenting themselves elsewhere, I may best serve my own interests here by standing at some remove Are you leaving? Can you say it straight out before I have a fucking birthday? I will be coming and going, is that straight out enough? What's the task you'd give us? And what's our fuckin' piece for doing 'em? Al Shut up To not let become over-onerous my interests encounter with the camp's retrogressive elements Meaning what, you phony bastard? Who do we kill? What's our pay? It ain't fair to make it that simple, Al Fuck you He took the pick to me simple enough We will get to numbers quickly once we've agreed in principle Numbers are the only principle I believe in, and naming what the numbers buy when you and him come to 'em, tell fucking Adams and he'll bring you my reply later Him and me, we've had our last word What have the Gods decreed? Too fearful and upset to relive it, E.
B We do agree in principle? Oh, Yes, Sir Numbers and acts is what's left to discuss Sounds like a Bible study, don't it? Charlie read me the telegram, then I seen 'em come into camp My exact fucking thought, "Look, Jane, two dead Niggers leading a dead fucking horse.
" Matter came to rope, Steve the drunk to cinch the noose Charlie's right for the first time in months Fucking Steve The exact type malicious cocksucker tars every fucking drunk with his brush Anyway, here's Trixie with the loan documents This succeeds, Bullock, what you're trying to work out here, I will doff hat to you and no fucking mistake Just don't let her take off her boots Did you know Miss Stubbs might sell her place? You gotta fucking sign Lot of shitbags hang around a bank Did you ever fucking notice? Asshole Trailing clouds of glory Do you read wordsworth? I do not, Madam, no How do you come to ask? You've just quoted him Well, I have a digest from which I memorize, suppressing the authors' names Enjoy your supper When will I raise courage to search that woman's room? Thank you My pleasure Don't look to take her order She likes to draw awhile before she eats "Bone weary but soldering on.
" Bellegarde as a soldier? He is an actor after all But unless you would build a new schoolhouse for Mrs.
Bullock to teach the camp's children in, I couldn't even begin to entertain the idea of a sale The most natural and constructive of stipulations, Miss Stubbs At your expense, I hope you understand I do And may I submit to you now my offer? Please do Very generous Thank you We've an agreement? Far as the schoolhouse and its costs? Absolutely separate, my obligation in that regard Those'd be exclusive Exactly They come to an understanding She seems quite thin Might be where he first went wrong, learning to read and cipher Why ain't he sign first? Why ain't I half a foot taller? You're who I came to first Order's right and amount is fair And once Steve signs, then I will I'm not a Goddamn errand boy, Hostetler, to mule this thing back and forth Give it to me Let me forge Steve's name I ain't gonna be first to sign and look a cunt when he don't Nigger, nigger, nigger Where the fuck have you been? I was looking for someone whose name you told me never to say again Amongst further instructions including not to look for him when he's fucking disappeared Well, I held off saying where I was I can repose no truth in someone who traffics with that type douche bag I don't think Hawkeye's a douche bag Who you believe you can salvage, Adams, is the douche bag you must avoid, and no effort of yours can preclude some point past help And you yourself, being his consort, in similar fucking straights And all the energies I've poured into you gone for naught I vow on the fucking subject I find you dead 'cause of him, I'll kick your corpse in the ear for the waste of my fucking time Anyways, what'd you want? I've named you to represent me in my dealings with fucking Hearst Tolliver too, in that connection With Tolliver in connection with Hearst? As he's put us in tandem, fucking Hearst You and Tolliver? If I sought an echo, Adams, I'd now be addressing a fucking mountain I'm in waters I don't know, nor soundings I can take To bring me the knowledge I need, my second needs to seem capable of disloyalty If that's supposed to be a compliment, thanks Get the fuck out Out out Go Get out Which is to say, being loyal, he can forego loyalty's display Like not searching out a friend who don't want to be found Just hoping he makes his way back, hmm? How's Dan gonna take your choosing me? That's my fucking problem to deal with Jack, how'd it go with that place? One has agreed beyond purchase to construct a new schoolhouse elsewhere That should go up prior, not to interrupt the fucking teacher Your law-giving tone is noted Lovely smile She sucks my prick Her methods deserted her completely Might varying the hour produce a different outcome? What's the hour's relevance? It's her technique's fuckin' awry Anyway, Jack, gotta get my ear pissed in I'm glad about your place Thank you, young man Glad you're still amongst us Nor, one imagines, is the local creek rife with oysters I'm onboard, Bullock And you are looking at a grateful man, and who ain't appreciated you previous the way he does now Sign We've accomplished something here today! Take this agreement and this pen, Go over to that livery and get that Nigger's signature I will Sign the fucking thing first Let's not lose our sense of proportion this late phase in the process Sign it! The Nigger signs and then I'll accept You know you hurt my feelings Dan That's the long and short of it, Al You fucking pick Adams to represent you, you hurt my fucking feelings and that is the fucking matter's end Would you go against me? That is not what we're talking about You know I'd never break loyalty That don't mean my feelings can't get hurt Fucking point is you'd never go against me Tolliver knows I need someone he don't know that about I don't think Silas would go agin you neither You and him haven't been through, me and him haven't been through what me and you've been through Hmm Not by a long shot So more than an opinion ain't possible Still, I'd be fucking surprised if either of us was mistaken Me too Fucking Doc What's his problem? Thank he's a fucking lunger Jesus Christ, it is one fucking thing after another Observe a decent interval, and we'll give it another fucking whirl Keep 'em separate, agree on a time tomorrow when their dicks will be down, have 'em sign simultaneous Petite and quite beautiful your mother is, for being a financial powerhouse Of service to the camp, turning her mine into houses and the like getting built, businesses begun Some for people that'll never know her name I'll take the air, just briefly I'll continue to be beaten at checkers Any fucking domicile but the graveyarn suits me fine Don't you worry about me I got things taken care of over here I don't know either But I do know that you're welcome wherever I go Is Mose invited to the new destination? Because I'd think you'd need to widen some doorways if he is Haven't talked to Mose about it Well, he can be the watchman then I have no issue with that We'll figure the rest out when time comes Where would the stage be? I don't know Yeah, I don't know either Ain't our line I guess That they agreed tonight is no guarantee what they'll do at 10:00 in the morning Please see that no harm comes to that horse I will Then after the watches were synchronized, another hour studying them like idiots to see if one gained on the other Sol It's not the fucking hour It's not the fucking vantage of the chair It's you that's changed the level of your suction somehow That's the fucking sum and substance of it Maybe if I get up on my knees? You're the cocksucker Change the fucking angle Hey, Jesus Christ, you'll turn me inside out Come on Advice from third fucking parties place a table on the boardwalk, people can jot their suggestions, roll in the much of the thoroughfare in gales of fucking laughter I did not shame myself I keep an open mind in that area Kid yourself about your behavior, you'll never learn a fuckin' thing I knew what was coming too Fucking Captain, holding me down I knew what the fuck was next When he chopped off your finger? He didn't chop off my finger Hearst chopped my fucking finger off The other fuck held me down They hold you down, you you can't get at them to help yourself Fucking cold in here anyway You want a blanket? If I do I'll put it round me You ain't boss of the fucking bedclothes They hold you down from behind, then you wonder why you're helpless How the fuck could you not be?! I don't like it either Another one that held me down, that fuckin' proctor when I tried to get to that ship He fuckin' held me, fuckin' wouldn't let me go Fucking my mind, you see? She was being restrainded Couldn't get back off that had got on the boat to New Orleans to go suck prick in Georgia She changed her mind and and I was being restrained by that fat bastard orphanage proctor Anyway, that's it That's the end of it That's the fucking conclusion Christ, I'd have wished to though probably she'd have thrown me overboard anyway, but I'd have wished to get to that fucking ship But I was being restrained I couldn't get from where she'd left me He held me to that bed, her calling from the ship that had changed her mind I don't like it either No, huh? What? When they hold you down I guess I do that, huh, with your fucking hair? No No? Well, bless you for a fucking fibber
Best time of day to go fuck yourself "From Samuel Fields to Miss Jane Cannary.
" I don't know any Samuel Fields Valediction is "Nigger General.
" Gimme that fuckin' thing, and keep the fuckin' contents to yourself! Trust, Gentlemen and Ladies, we live in faith! John Langrishe, Madam, wishing you good morning on an august occasion Morning Hoping to walk with you a bit.
Better to represent my intentions this day than the last All right May I ask your name? Joanie Stubbs I regret having abrupted upon you, Miss Stubbs as you gardened I took you for interested in something you mightn't have been My interest, to be direct, is in buying your building What do you want to use it for? A theater My troupe will season in this camp Well, it's a schoolhouse now And very handsomely appointed for that purpose It was a whorehouse before Anyways, I don't know if I'd want to sell Well, perhaps you'd consider renting Perhaps you'd consider fucking yourself If I was approaching you backwards, Captain, had a mirror to observe your activity, just now I'd be most trepidatious, for, Johnny, this is a man when acting from behind and advantaged with a weapon, very much to be feared Was just doing my job You don't want to speak like that again to Mr.
Hearst Yeah, I do Do you wanna try to change my fuckin' mind? Not only will I change your mind, I'll rip your whole fucking head off Another fuckin' invite Fuckin' Hearst must take me for an optimist I'm gonna kill that cocksucker All in good time I'm curious about those tables with the numbers on them Well, they're for gambling on, those Various kinds of games of chance or different sorts So I imagined I wonder if this might be convenient time for me to learn? Leon, uh, take over supervising for me while I give this young lady some private instruction Yes, sir Supervising now, Sir This over here is a choice table Horatio, beat it Am I inconveniencing you? Oh damn Chinks They shrunk these pants in the laundry You ever throw the bones before, Ma'am? I've caught some Oh these are my personal dice Nice, uh, fuckin' set I'm happy and glad to allow you to learn on 'em Damn chinks I should cut your salary 20%! Uh Based on time you're absent campaigning Can I make up the hours once I'm beat? Your plans are idiotic You're running for Sheriff to be a fireman And hope to be a second deputy in case they start a fire department Well, that's stupid and I ought to cut your salary You have to, you have to Why not build a fuckin' fire wagon that you then rent out to the camp? If I had money If you had a loan for the wagon's makings and help with the fuckin' carpentry, would you build the wagon then? Uh, I'd repay you at fuckin' interest, boss Well, that's the 20%, pre-deducted from the makings' purchase We build the fuckin' wagon then rent it to the camp And don't ever speak of this again A-a-a-and two fuckin' fire hats Nigger General ain't quit drinkin', we know that for fuckin' sure How do we know that? What you just read to me is a drunkard's question "What is state of affairs in camp with regards to the horse?" Seems to me whatever the state of affairs about the horse is in the camp, It's a drunkard's decision bringin' the cocksucker back That's on Hostetler, according to the little Nigger General, if you'd understand what you fuckin' read Hostetler means to bring the horse back Hostetler! "You're right, Jane I'm a fuckin' moron as usual What I should be doin', being as you have no experience, s helping you compose a telegraph back to little Nigger General as requested.
" Come over here and save yourself the cost of a wire Oh, fuck! What are you lookin' at, huh? think just 'cause I happen to got a peppermint, it's yours by right? Always possible I'm having a nightmare You greedy, sweet-toothed cocksucker That's right that's right You come to take my place away! Oh, Miss Stubbs Take a seat in that cell there till I square a place away for you I have an offer to sell my place How are you inclined to answer? Unless you don't yet know, if I ain't out of place askin' I told the man to fuck himself Tactics or a true position? I don't know I don't know, Mr.
Utter Why don't I close up for a while? Oh, please don't Nigger General and Hostetler brung that horse back to camp, got away from 'em and trampled the Sheriff's boy Is that so? Wherever the two of them was, I guess they didn't feel their lives were in enough danger Well, people will do strange things For years at a time Pick any part of my life, for example It just don't sit well with me To sell your place, you mean? But I can't think why I wouldn't What's wrong with whim for a reason? I'll tell you what I like What I like is knowing these children are learning I like that, and I like watering their garden the days they ain't in session The day that school opened, I remember sayin' to Sheriff Bullock what a nice thing it seemed, watching them little ones walk off to your place That's what I Goddamn like, imagining them walkin' into it I ain't seen it yet, but I'd like to, and when he wanted to buy it, all I thought's "Now I never will.
" Oh God Almighty What is it, Miss Stubbs? I wish once I could care for those little ones Just once instead of doin' what I did Walked in like the past six weeks never fuckin' happened Never fuckin' left the camp Never fuckin' abandoned the fuckin' horses to starve, or die of fuckin' thirst Nigger motherfuckers! Harry, what the fuck are you waitin' for?! What are you talking about, Steve What I swore up and down was gonna happen, and nobody paid me any heed What happened to me in Utica and every other fuckin' place I've ever been in my fuckin' life! The white man bears the nigger's weight around his neck like a fucking albatross And yet people still ask, "Well, why is he bent over?! And why can he barely fuckin' walk?!" The livery's gone All my labor, efforts are gone for naught And they walked in like they never fucking left, and they didn't take responsibility for trampling that white boy! Nor did they give less than a flyin' fuck! And I wonder what the fuckin' parents are gonna say about that too! Why don't you stand down over there, Harry? Many thanks If you stay in camp long, Sir, you may have the delightful surprise of meeting your identical twin He has appointed to degrade himself The open question is with whom Now we'll find out about you What is it? Or justice for the white man or for your own dead child At the Saloon Number fucking 10! Well, are you coming? Yeah, I'm fucking coming Mrs.
Ellsworth You don't confuse me with Mrs.
Bullock? Well, as far as the conjugal enterprise, I'll admit often feeling like a schoolboy Thank you for it Speaking further, 'twixt your mine and now this bank, however much I mayn't be good at it, I feel I married rather well I put you on notice Want my money, it better be fucking available, day or fucking night Mayn't I draw you a map then in case it's night you want it, to lead you to where I live so you can wake me? Now fuck you then I ain't depositing Oh no? Oh, say it ain't fuckin' so, you stupid fucking asshole! Now now now now Now now, fucking what?! Now now, keep your voice down Who the fuck are you anyway? Sir Stay out of this Deposits here, if we fucking let you make 'em, are backed by this lady's gold mine So do not confuse her with some paper palace fly-by-night who means "catch me if you can, turn me upside down and whatever falls out of my pants pocket is what's behind my scrip," when his note says "Full faith and credit.
" Thank you, Mr.
Ellsworth She'd make the uses of money available for people in the camp ain't belligerent cocksuckers Short of following you around with her fucking mine on her back, how else is she supposed to do it? Thank you You're welcome I am Mrs.
Ellsworth Ah How do you do? I guess I'll try you out Our hearts fucking leap with joy Keep him here Now we'll see if he takes the nigger's word or how they fucking lie Shut up! Well, give me a drink and it's a deal, Tom Go on away from here now Ain't nobody trying to keep you Yeah, that's why I come back with you, Hostetler, to worsen my chances when I try to flee I was coming to find you once I had the horse cleaned This is the horse that hurt your boy We collected him and we brung him back He died The horse escaped in my care, you may hold the boy's dying against me Hostetler took precautions We was trying to nut the horse shut up now shut up I collected the horse and brought him back I'm back too You say what you think is right I'm not gonna act against you for an accident Your boy I'm as sorry as I can be I hope you will take that to his mother for me I'm here to talk about the livery I feel sorry running away from this too It's a shame leaving animals uncared for Wanting not to be killed will put you to some difficult choices Steve's been looking after the place Did damn good at first look Any chance to keep hell from breaking loose between you? He left out of here shouting and screaming off of me saying thanks for looking out I'm asking, Hostetler, far as you go, does hell have to break loose? No, hell don't have to break loose A colleague of mine, Leon, out of the Bella Union you might not have noticed him Leon remarks to me after you left, "That young lady had a front porch on her a fella could read a book off of.
" You know Leon said that unsolicited It's time to go In a few days, we can do this again Uh, Captain will be back at the helm! Mr.
Langrishe, I couldn't possibly consider your offer unless you would agree to building a new schoolhouse at your expense for Mrs.
Bullock and the children Well, who could say no to that? Well, what what if Mrs.
Bullock doesn't want a change of location? I can't think why she'd prefer teaching in an ex-brothel over a place new-built for schooling People are strange about things, Charlie But if you like, I'll get her say-so And then I'll speak to Mr.
Langrishe Why don't' we talk at the hardware store? Why don't we talk right here? A 30-minute recess boys No recess on my account I don't want my getting' fucked to put others to inconvenience No one's here to fuck you, Steve, if you'd just quit running your mouth First off, I thank you for looking to the livery He'll talk to me through you or he won't get any fucking response I'm grateful for the care you gave the animals Now you wait until he translates from ape Don't insult him again You being this kind of neutral Sheriff is why I'm gonna vote for Harry Manning I want to pay you for your time and your trouble That's it? Send me on my fucking way? And if you wanted to work there, I would be willing to keep you on Look at him, gritting his teeth, holding onto his fucking nose! Don't you do me any fucking favors, Hostetler! I didn't ask permission of anyone to look after that stock, and I'm not gonna start with a fucking nigger! The Sheriff will have your back pay if you come to change your mind Fuck you! I was answerable to that horse that trampled his boy Camp being stirred up, if I lingered to make my arrangements I don't' think I would have lived to catch that horse Ain't that the purest form or nigger logic? He runs, he blames the white man, and then he comes back and he treats him like dirt! Hey, when can I start working for you, you fucking monkey ape?! Why don't you start jumping up and down and pounding your chest and murder a few dozen lice?! You motherfucker What did you say about my mother?! You motherfuckers What did you just say about these people! You ofay motherfuckers! Put me down until you're ready to kill me or run You're gonna leave this to me Do you understand? You leave it to me I came my part and he wouldn't meet me I'll take care of it Will you let me try? It's what I want for my son Put me down now If I do, it won't be to kill you and I'm not running So what are we gonna do then? Put me down I was gonna go to Oregon You let him buy me out fair and I'll fucking go I'll be at the livery He'll sell to you Do you want to take it on? I don't have the means to purchase it If you had the means at loan Yes, I'd be willing, very much so No bargain My partner would make the price You'd say yes or no Yeah, I'm interested, if I had the means at loan What do you think of that? Sheriff Bullock Trying to broker some settlement between Steve and Hostetler Well I'll find you later then Be quick, you got me now Must've been unwelcome to Mrs.
Bullock, that horse being brought back Not wantin' to intrude on her, Miss Stubbs was having asked me to find out, might I ask you to speak in her stead as to something I believe we both know where she stand on? Is that your Goddamn idea of quick, Charlie? Miss Stubbs, that owns the Chez Ami building where Mrs.
Bullock teaches, has got asked to name a price which she'd sell at She got stipulations and likes of which I won't bore you with, but her big worry, if the buyer on his own nickel were to put a new schoolhouse up elsewhere, would Mrs.
Bullock be loathe to leave the Chez? Why would she be loathe to leave it? Can I take that as a "no" as if from your wife's own lips? Yeah Thank you Sorry to hold you up "Be quick.
" Fucking delicate operation Jack One thought he'd engaged a room for you at the other end of the hall I'm going to it now Invites me and Tolliver for a chat What the fuck is in his head? Does he think he broke me? Does this cocksucker think he broke me and now we're at his beck and call? Oh, Jesus Christ, get your head off it Get your fucking head off it for all the fucking good you're doing down there That's all I need: At a perfect juncture you to alter your action and forget your previous method I didn't alter my action No? is my dick in your mouth? Do I have a hard-on? Then you change your action Go back to your previous fucking method Hmm Does he construe my forbearance as weakness is that what the fuck nags at me? Or my considerations of alternatives for being fucking intimidated because the time's coming he sees what I'm up to beyond any fucking mistake, and I only hope you don't doubt it Huh, you see?! Y-y-y-you don't think that counts as altering your action? You would change your entire fucking mouth pattern Sorry Sorry? Oh, I guess that's okay then because my goal before my meeting wasn't to come and clear my fucking head, not so much as to hear you say you're sorry, you stupid fucking mutt Should I go? No Tell me who you want in the election Star for Mayor and Harry Manning for Sheriff Star for Mayor and Bullock for fucking Sheriff Bullock yells at you Get out Shut up and get out Does he think I'm fucking afraid? Young man Jack Less throb today, one hopes, in the phantom digit Not to fucking mention elsewhere, huh? Might I ask you what you know of a Miss Stubbs that owns the Chez Ami? Whoremistress Not presently active, I'm told Hearst's geologist killed three of her girls The three he didn't she hid under canvas and spirited out of camp Now lets her place as a schoolhouse My impression, she donates it To cleanse the camp's idea of her? Would that base her turning away a theater type's offer to buy? Wouldn't enter into it Cares for a gut-shot shitbird no one in camp has time for, nor she has any love for either Loyal, see? That type Some sentimentality do you suppose, about the building itself? Might that account for her holding on? I wouldn't know, Jack She's all right Must think I'm a fucking dog, forgives the blow, first friendly scratch of the ear Invites me back to his rooms, fucking Hearst Shall I accompany as your second? My obvious unsuitability might confuse him Do survive E.
B The titans gather Swearengen Tolliver Do we now assault Olympus? Quiet, E.
B I think Cochran's a lunger Bit motley ourselves, huh? What would you make that livery worth? I'd have to look into it I need a figure now if you made me say without investigating Laying by for the future Very forward looking Oh, I'm keen-eyed Ahead and behind Your mark would go there I'll sign my names, Mrs.
Garret I've been lettered since I was 12 Since you can read, you may wish to examine my nameplate Mrs.
Ellsworth, I'm I'm very sorry and very very apologetic Perhaps you would finish signing over there while I tend to Mr.
Bullock Opened an account Mr.
Bullock I'd like that drunk Steve to have a loan $1200, title to the livery as collateral I'll cosign the note Has Steve clear title? He will once he's bought out Hostetler That's what the money's for What is Steve-the-Drunk's surname? Fields $1200, Trixie, payable to a Mr.
Steve Fields upon his signature and submission of title to the livery, Mr.
Bullock to cosign All right Thank you My back's in frank rebellion Uh, gentlemen, will you mind if I keep to this angles? Hang upside down from the ceiling for all of me It may come to that Mr.
Swearengen, I will take your silence for assent We pass another milestone Bank of Deadwood opens its doors Is not Mrs.
Ellsworth a dynamo? Let's find one and send it to her What's the occasion? I have my physician to see How are you indisposed, Mr.
Swearengen? Sick at the stomach Would you wish to leave now? Mr.
Tolliver can report our conversation Tough it out, Al, like me that's guts is more outside his pants than in The occasion? The camp comes to such an hour I'd have us reach a new understanding The "hour" meaning elections I am given pause by the quality of certain of the likely victors But I have come to believe as well that my temperament ill suits me for environments such as this one must become And other opportunities presenting themselves elsewhere, I may best serve my own interests here by standing at some remove Are you leaving? Can you say it straight out before I have a fucking birthday? I will be coming and going, is that straight out enough? What's the task you'd give us? And what's our fuckin' piece for doing 'em? Al Shut up To not let become over-onerous my interests encounter with the camp's retrogressive elements Meaning what, you phony bastard? Who do we kill? What's our pay? It ain't fair to make it that simple, Al Fuck you He took the pick to me simple enough We will get to numbers quickly once we've agreed in principle Numbers are the only principle I believe in, and naming what the numbers buy when you and him come to 'em, tell fucking Adams and he'll bring you my reply later Him and me, we've had our last word What have the Gods decreed? Too fearful and upset to relive it, E.
B We do agree in principle? Oh, Yes, Sir Numbers and acts is what's left to discuss Sounds like a Bible study, don't it? Charlie read me the telegram, then I seen 'em come into camp My exact fucking thought, "Look, Jane, two dead Niggers leading a dead fucking horse.
" Matter came to rope, Steve the drunk to cinch the noose Charlie's right for the first time in months Fucking Steve The exact type malicious cocksucker tars every fucking drunk with his brush Anyway, here's Trixie with the loan documents This succeeds, Bullock, what you're trying to work out here, I will doff hat to you and no fucking mistake Just don't let her take off her boots Did you know Miss Stubbs might sell her place? You gotta fucking sign Lot of shitbags hang around a bank Did you ever fucking notice? Asshole Trailing clouds of glory Do you read wordsworth? I do not, Madam, no How do you come to ask? You've just quoted him Well, I have a digest from which I memorize, suppressing the authors' names Enjoy your supper When will I raise courage to search that woman's room? Thank you My pleasure Don't look to take her order She likes to draw awhile before she eats "Bone weary but soldering on.
" Bellegarde as a soldier? He is an actor after all But unless you would build a new schoolhouse for Mrs.
Bullock to teach the camp's children in, I couldn't even begin to entertain the idea of a sale The most natural and constructive of stipulations, Miss Stubbs At your expense, I hope you understand I do And may I submit to you now my offer? Please do Very generous Thank you We've an agreement? Far as the schoolhouse and its costs? Absolutely separate, my obligation in that regard Those'd be exclusive Exactly They come to an understanding She seems quite thin Might be where he first went wrong, learning to read and cipher Why ain't he sign first? Why ain't I half a foot taller? You're who I came to first Order's right and amount is fair And once Steve signs, then I will I'm not a Goddamn errand boy, Hostetler, to mule this thing back and forth Give it to me Let me forge Steve's name I ain't gonna be first to sign and look a cunt when he don't Nigger, nigger, nigger Where the fuck have you been? I was looking for someone whose name you told me never to say again Amongst further instructions including not to look for him when he's fucking disappeared Well, I held off saying where I was I can repose no truth in someone who traffics with that type douche bag I don't think Hawkeye's a douche bag Who you believe you can salvage, Adams, is the douche bag you must avoid, and no effort of yours can preclude some point past help And you yourself, being his consort, in similar fucking straights And all the energies I've poured into you gone for naught I vow on the fucking subject I find you dead 'cause of him, I'll kick your corpse in the ear for the waste of my fucking time Anyways, what'd you want? I've named you to represent me in my dealings with fucking Hearst Tolliver too, in that connection With Tolliver in connection with Hearst? As he's put us in tandem, fucking Hearst You and Tolliver? If I sought an echo, Adams, I'd now be addressing a fucking mountain I'm in waters I don't know, nor soundings I can take To bring me the knowledge I need, my second needs to seem capable of disloyalty If that's supposed to be a compliment, thanks Get the fuck out Out out Go Get out Which is to say, being loyal, he can forego loyalty's display Like not searching out a friend who don't want to be found Just hoping he makes his way back, hmm? How's Dan gonna take your choosing me? That's my fucking problem to deal with Jack, how'd it go with that place? One has agreed beyond purchase to construct a new schoolhouse elsewhere That should go up prior, not to interrupt the fucking teacher Your law-giving tone is noted Lovely smile She sucks my prick Her methods deserted her completely Might varying the hour produce a different outcome? What's the hour's relevance? It's her technique's fuckin' awry Anyway, Jack, gotta get my ear pissed in I'm glad about your place Thank you, young man Glad you're still amongst us Nor, one imagines, is the local creek rife with oysters I'm onboard, Bullock And you are looking at a grateful man, and who ain't appreciated you previous the way he does now Sign We've accomplished something here today! Take this agreement and this pen, Go over to that livery and get that Nigger's signature I will Sign the fucking thing first Let's not lose our sense of proportion this late phase in the process Sign it! The Nigger signs and then I'll accept You know you hurt my feelings Dan That's the long and short of it, Al You fucking pick Adams to represent you, you hurt my fucking feelings and that is the fucking matter's end Would you go against me? That is not what we're talking about You know I'd never break loyalty That don't mean my feelings can't get hurt Fucking point is you'd never go against me Tolliver knows I need someone he don't know that about I don't think Silas would go agin you neither You and him haven't been through, me and him haven't been through what me and you've been through Hmm Not by a long shot So more than an opinion ain't possible Still, I'd be fucking surprised if either of us was mistaken Me too Fucking Doc What's his problem? Thank he's a fucking lunger Jesus Christ, it is one fucking thing after another Observe a decent interval, and we'll give it another fucking whirl Keep 'em separate, agree on a time tomorrow when their dicks will be down, have 'em sign simultaneous Petite and quite beautiful your mother is, for being a financial powerhouse Of service to the camp, turning her mine into houses and the like getting built, businesses begun Some for people that'll never know her name I'll take the air, just briefly I'll continue to be beaten at checkers Any fucking domicile but the graveyarn suits me fine Don't you worry about me I got things taken care of over here I don't know either But I do know that you're welcome wherever I go Is Mose invited to the new destination? Because I'd think you'd need to widen some doorways if he is Haven't talked to Mose about it Well, he can be the watchman then I have no issue with that We'll figure the rest out when time comes Where would the stage be? I don't know Yeah, I don't know either Ain't our line I guess That they agreed tonight is no guarantee what they'll do at 10:00 in the morning Please see that no harm comes to that horse I will Then after the watches were synchronized, another hour studying them like idiots to see if one gained on the other Sol It's not the fucking hour It's not the fucking vantage of the chair It's you that's changed the level of your suction somehow That's the fucking sum and substance of it Maybe if I get up on my knees? You're the cocksucker Change the fucking angle Hey, Jesus Christ, you'll turn me inside out Come on Advice from third fucking parties place a table on the boardwalk, people can jot their suggestions, roll in the much of the thoroughfare in gales of fucking laughter I did not shame myself I keep an open mind in that area Kid yourself about your behavior, you'll never learn a fuckin' thing I knew what was coming too Fucking Captain, holding me down I knew what the fuck was next When he chopped off your finger? He didn't chop off my finger Hearst chopped my fucking finger off The other fuck held me down They hold you down, you you can't get at them to help yourself Fucking cold in here anyway You want a blanket? If I do I'll put it round me You ain't boss of the fucking bedclothes They hold you down from behind, then you wonder why you're helpless How the fuck could you not be?! I don't like it either Another one that held me down, that fuckin' proctor when I tried to get to that ship He fuckin' held me, fuckin' wouldn't let me go Fucking my mind, you see? She was being restrainded Couldn't get back off that had got on the boat to New Orleans to go suck prick in Georgia She changed her mind and and I was being restrained by that fat bastard orphanage proctor Anyway, that's it That's the end of it That's the fucking conclusion Christ, I'd have wished to though probably she'd have thrown me overboard anyway, but I'd have wished to get to that fucking ship But I was being restrained I couldn't get from where she'd left me He held me to that bed, her calling from the ship that had changed her mind I don't like it either No, huh? What? When they hold you down I guess I do that, huh, with your fucking hair? No No? Well, bless you for a fucking fibber