Party Down s03e04 Episode Script

1
Yeah, this is Kyle.
Oh, hi.
I-I just thought--
- Sting?
- Wait, what?
What's Sting?
Sting is
the Grammy-winning artist
our guests won VIP tickets
to see
after this pre-show luau.
Anyway, just keep
the booze and food flowing
till they board the bus
to the show,
should be golden.
The watchword is "chill."
Chill, yes, of course.
Well, Chill B. Chillington
is the name,
and chilling's the g-- [groans]
"What's Sting?"
Seventeen Grammys is what.
What the hell
is wrong with you?
[laughs]
- You know about Sting?
- Hmm?
- What's that?
- Ah, fucking kids.
Sting! The Police!
[horn honks]
Oh, my God.
- Not the handicap spot.
- What a dick move. Roman!
I'm allowed to park here.
I have a placard.
Carpal tunnel
is a serious disability.
I'm in pain
every once in a while.
[Kyle sighs]
It's no joke.
Was that about your callback?
Well, I hoped it might be,
but it was just some lady.
Apparently,
my car warranty's expired.
Man, I killed every audition.
I don't get what happened.
Clearly, they didn't get
what you were doing.
So fuck them.
You do not need their approval.
I do.
That's what auditions are.
Man, what if I never act again?
No.
Too easy.
So Malibu.
- Malibu.
- It's pretty groovy, right?
Very. You sure it's okay
for me to tag along like this?
Yeah, it's just
a bunch of dudes
hanging before a Sting show.
- Hmm.
- Watchword is "chill."
- Mm-hmm.
- And if anyone asks,
- you're with us.
- Oh, yeah.
Like, you're you,
but I'm a consultant
analyzing your
paper product use cost flow.
Yeah, or you're just with us.
- Okay.
- Hey, did you, uh--
did you bring the-the stuff?
Oh, you mean
did I bring the mushrooms?
I still can't get over you used
to do this kind of thing.
I was cool once.
You know that thing
where you get those
cool psychedelic insights
into your life?
- Sure.
- I was great at that.
And some say
that I remain cool.
- Holy shit.
- Right?
Oh, they look like high-quality
mushrooms, I think.
No, I mean "holy shit" as in,
that is a comically large
amount of mushrooms.
I haven't done it for a while.
I forgot how much
you need for two.
- Two blue whales?
- Okay.
Oh, shit, are those mushrooms?
I would love to access
some expanded
creative consciousness today.
- Oh.
- Dude. Mushrooms?
Why are you down there?
Oh, I'm just dealing
with some heavy shit.
His car warranty ran out.
[upbeat jazzy music plays]
Is there anyone here
who doesn't want shrooms?
Alter my brain
chemistry with poison fungi?
- Pass.
- Roman is scared. Shocker.
I'm not scared;
I just don't see the point
of going around giggling
uncontrollably at shit.
The point is to unlock
your creative unconscious.
I don't need drugs
to unlock
my creative unconscious.
'Cause he doesn't use it.
When was the last time
you wrote anything?
Like, what about your opus?
He's been working
on his opus
for, like, ten years.
Is that a long time
for an opus?
It's half the amount of time
Michael Crichton
worked on Sphere,
which isn't even an opus.
It's just Sphere.
I've tried to crack the story,
but now I'm just really focused
on my vlog.
- Why?
- Car, money,
positive affirmation--
all things
I don't get from writing?
That is the most
bourgeois bullshit
I have ever heard
in my entire life.
It's called reality, Lucy.
And even if I did finish it,
no one wants it.
For a true artist, rejection
is the truest affirmation.
Look at Kyle.
So that's a no on shrooms?
- Come on, Roman.
- You're scared.
Maybe he just needs
a little love.
- He's a little scared.
- Come on.
[all]
Roman! Roman! Roman! Roman!
You guys are peer pressuring me
into drugs.
That's right.
[all] Roman! Roman!
Okay.
[all cheering]
What-what's, like, a good amount?
Is this, like, okay?
- For a first time?
- Mm.
- Less than that.
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
I want to see
all the psychic realms
and the face of God
and all that shit.
Oh, jeez, guy, you'll-you'll
cleave your psyche in twain.
Hell yes, I am going
to livestream my first trip.
Can you imagine the numbers
if my psyche
cleaves in twain live?
- I would watch that.
- Check it out.
Oh!
Okay, guys, good news.
Constance dropped her iPad
in her koi pond,
so no spiritual message.
Oh.
Guys, the food
is for the guests, okay?
You know,
if I wasn't so chill right now,
I'd give you all RDDs.
But, hey, Miss Adler?
What are you doing here?
I'm a consultant,
uh, for the paper.
For the paper company.
Paper goods.
No, you're not.
She's with us.
[indistinct chatter]
["Reminiscing" playing]
[Ron chuckles]
Stick around, all right?
Let's get another one!
- Cheers!
- Cheers!
No negative energy.
Yes.
All right, all right, okay.
Okay, who's having a good time?
[crowd cheering]
- Enjoy.
- I think I felt something.
Do you feel anything?
Yeah, stupid for doing this.
All right, and who is psyched
for VIP seating
to see the legendary Sting?
[crowd cheering]
Whoo! Sting, baby!
[laughs] You psyched for Sting?
- I don't know who I am.
- Oh, no.
All right, okay, okay.
So I want everybody to eat,
drink, and have a good time
until it's time
to get on that bus.
And remember, the watchword
for the day is "chill."
[all] Chill!
- Yes!
- Chill, yeah, well,
Chill B. Chillington's
the name, and sh--
oh, she's fucking gone again.
[Little River Band]
I'm talking about ♪
A lifetime plan ♪
Oof.
Wow.
Uh, one mai tai.
- Beautiful.
- Isn't it?
It's like a Maui sunset.
[chuckles]
I guess.
- Oh.
- Henry?
The watchword is "chill,"
like you said.
So weird.
Yeah, the radio people
told us earlier
the watchword is "chill."
Oh, shoot, I thought
it was "synchronicity."
The album by The Police,
featuring bass and vocals by
[both] Sting.
See, now,
was that synchronicity?
I don't actually know
what the word means.
- Do you?
- No, no, no, no, I don't know.
- Hey.
- Hi.
So a bird just looked at me
a certain way.
- Bird?
- Bird.
Bird.
I think it's happening.
I'm gonna start the stream.
[Henry chuckles]
[phone beeps]
Hey, everybody.
[both] Hey.
Who's down for some
Sacks on the beach?
[laughs]
All right,
everybody, buckle up,
'cause today
ole Sacks is embarking
on his first
psychedelic odyssey.
- Let's talk about fingers.
- Bye.
They're just these
I should maybe
keep an eye on him,
like, in case he goes
into a weird place.
Yeah, like a lizard store.
Or an emotional place.
You cool here
if I ramble a little?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
I got a shirt going.
Oh. Hey.
[Henry chuckles]
Oh, you're--
this is the front of you.
You need--uh, all right.
I can't believe it ♪
Can't believe it ♪
[both grunting]
What I feel
Looking in your eyes ♪
♪
There's no need
For any disguise ♪
What do you got going on here?
Sh-shrimp,
shrimp is going on here.
Can't believe it ♪
Uh
Hey there.
Thank you.
I'm in love with you ♪
Uh
Better believe it ♪
[upbeat music playing]
So what was it like?
What?
When you quit acting.
What was it like?
Beer.
Rough, actually.
- Yeah.
- But kind of a relief.
A relief?
Like, I'd been
in this weird limbo
for so long.
A limbo. Like, who am I?
Yeah, like a formless limbo.
- Yeah, I've been there.
- You were an actor?
No, no, no, sorry.
Thought you were talking
about divorce.
- Oh.
- Formless limbo,
who am I, finally moving on--
- that was my divorce.
- Huh.
You know,
all I ever wanted to be
was a good husband, good dad.
- Right.
- That's who I was,
all I ever wanted to be.
So when that went away, well
- Kyle, I need to talk to you.
- talk about limbo
Not now, man.
Hey, so how did--how did you
deal with that? Stop.
Well, that's
the question, isn't it?
You know, I just been
figuring it out
in bits and pieces, you know,
- day by day.
- I gotta talk to you, Kyle.
Dude, I'm talking to this guy.
Jeff. Go do what you need to.
- I'm gonna hit the head.
- Kyle.
Yeah, we'll talk later, man.
Dude, what the fuck?
I was talking to Jeff.
What are you,
freaking out or something?
No, I'm fine.
Just, pe-people
are looking at me.
Oh.
[Henry chuckles]
- Okay, all right.
- There's just something
weird and off
about this whole party.
[laughter]
It's--you're just
a little paranoid, that's all.
It's a first-timer
classic thing.
- Relax.
- I'm not paranoid.
[laughter]
There's just people
who are weird, and
they're looking at me
a certain way.
Oh.
[laughter]
Okay, fine, be dicks about it.
[laughter]
So much for so-called
drugs camaraderie.
- Drug what?
- Oh, no,
that's not a thing, man.
[laughs]
- Aw, Roman!
- Come on, man.
[meditative throat singing
playing over speaker]
Ooh, okay, how we doing?
I need more mini tacos
and shrimp things
because they're going like--
♪
What the hell
are you listening to?
It helps me think differently.
Right.
[music stops]
So, uh, how we doing?
Okay, I need more, uh--what?
What is that?
It is something I'm working on.
For a laid-back luau,
I wanted
to try a fun crowd-pleaser.
Right.
- What is it?
- It is called
spanashe.
Oh, what is that, Italian?
It's made up. [chuckles]
- What is it?
- Try it.
[sighs]
Mm, well, that's-that's, um--
Well, it tastes like something.
- Mm-hmm.
- Huh. It's weird.
[laughter]
Is it even food?
Oh, my God, exactly!
Is it food?
It is spiced wood pulp.
Paper, basically.
It's got the quality of food--
texture, flavor, shape--
but no nutritional value, so
So it's not food.
Or is it?
- Is it?
- You're eating it.
Is this a joke?
It's a fun conceptual piece,
Ron.
- So it's not food.
- Or is it?
God damn it. Wow.
It's to help
open your mind
to see and think in new ways,
to collapse
the traditional boundaries.
Well, I--
it's-it's an appetizer.
Are you high on weed?
[laughs] No.
I don't do drugs.
Ha-ha. Here we go.
Spanashe.
Okay, so you can get free
tickets, who's it gonna be?
- Probably Matchbox.
- Nice.
- Blink.
- Okay.
- Mm, Bizkit.
- Mm-hmm.
You're a '90s kid.
I could tell.
But I'm not saying no
to Sting tickets.
Motherfucker has 17 Grammys,
hello.
Mm-hmm. Oh, that's beautiful.
Yeah, it's like Big Bird
on fire.
Henry.
- There's a bush down there.
- What?
No, it has a style all its own.
Cool.
Hey, um, this was a good idea.
- I know.
- Yeah.
I can't believe I have to go
in the office Monday
and pitch the fucking
Douglas Firspin-off.
- Douglas Fir?
- Douglas Fir.
Is it a man named Douglas
who's part tree?
Yes.
[laughs]
- No way.
- Yes.
[laughs] Really?
Yes.
What's the spin-off of that?
Manputer.
Manputer?
It's a man
who's also a computer.
[both] Manputer.
[laughter]
Oh, my God.
What?
- What?
- When I was starting out,
I really thought
that I was gonna make
important independent cinema.
[laughter]
I-I said,
"Are we having fun yet?"
[laughter]
I was like, "I am gonna make
important independent cinema."
Me too.
God, you should have done it.
You'd be great.
Oh, I tried. Hey, you did.
Then I didn't.
Yeah, you were too good at it,
so now you're doing Manputer.
Oh, no!
Yeah.
What if you were doing it?
What if you
were Colonel Stryker?
What's that?
He's a colonel.
He's a Mark Strong type.
He is a regular
in the extended universe.
You could be him,
and then you'd be back.
What do you think?
That sounds crazy.
Why do you say that?
'Cause we're on mushrooms.
- You're on mushrooms?
- [both] No.
Hey, speaking of,
how's Sackson?
Who? Shit.
He was there,
and then I looked at a bush,
- and then he wasn't there!
- Oh.
Oh, God, I lost Sackson.
Uh, you--isn't he
doing a livestream?
Right!
He should be right here.
Oh, damn, so, uh,
current update,
I'm in a blue tube
of consciousness.
He's in a blue tube
of consciousness.
- What the fuck is that?
- And I'm fully
unstuck in time,
and I'm-I'm probably a bird.
- [both] Bird.
- Let's take a look
at these numbers.
Oh, they keep going up.
Oh, wait, I know where he is!
- Where?
- Can you watch the bar, please?
- Can do, boss.
- Come on! Follow me!
Okay.
Get out the good shit.
Thank you.
- Yo, dude!
- Hey!
[laughter, indistinct chatter]
[static crackling]
Uh
Right, the pink bow tie,
he just made me.
Yup, with the long hair,
glasses on.
Oh, no.
- Excuse me.
- What?
Hey, bud, can you
come with us for a second?
Uh
Can you come this way, please?
Guys, I didn't-- I'm not--
why is he holding me so tight?
He's a strong man,
that's why, okay?
Just follow this man.
- Jazzed for Sting? [laughs]
- Yep!
He gonna put on a show!
[laughs]
Wait, the sponsors tent?
[chuckles nervously]
Am I in trouble
with the sponsors?
Nah, man, everything's chill.
I'm chill. You're chill, right?
Help, help.
Nope, this way, this way.
Just go right in.
The tent is chill.
- I'm listening.
- Not temperature-wise.
Yeah, just keep walking, okay?
- Just be chill, okay?
- Okay.
- Sit.
- I'm chill.
Sit!
[indistinct radio chatter]
- So this is the guy?
- This the guy.
I'm not the guy.
What do we got here,
shrimp? Mm.
Tomato, basil, mozzarella.
"Tomato, basil, mozzarella."
Fucking rabbit food.
So earlier, you were
talking to a guy at the bar.
Dirty blond, beard.
Wannabe Kris Kristofferson
looking piece of shit.
- Jeff?
- Jeff Daniels.
- No relation.
- To whom?
- The actor.
- The what?
Jeff Daniels.
He's an American icon.
Jeff Daniels.
Newsroom?
Squid and the Whale.
Dumb & Dumber?
Dumb & Dumber?
Dumb & Dumber?
- Look, Roman.
- How do you know my name?
I'm Lieutenant Sacker.
This isn't a luau.
No one's won anything.
Every "prizewinner"
is a deadbeat parent
with an outstanding
child support warrant
who took the bait
for free tickets.
But when they get on that bus,
they're not going
to a Sting concert.
They're not?
They're going to a sting.
[laughs] Get it?
Yeah, great gag, Johnson.
Look, I talked
to these guys, okay?
We would get a better response
if we went more '90s.
Blink, Matchbox, okay?
There's a new generation
of deadbeats
that have no connection
to Sting at all.
Joe, we discussed this.
We're leaving mooks
on the street
so that Johnson
can have his dumb gag.
Dumb?
These dipshits getting on a bus
that literally says "sting"
right on it,
- it's good, right?
- It's fine.
It's a B-plus at best, Johnson!
We don't know--
You're not a comedian!
We don't know if we have
the right Jeff Daniels,
so we need you to get us
a current address
or ID his car so we can
issue a warrant for search.
- Why me?
- You made contact.
And you're sharp.
Those dildos don't suspect
a thing, but you,
you made us immediately.
Zeroed in on me
the second he saw me.
I did?
It was freaky.
Look, I didn't even--
I had--
Kyle talked to him
a lot longer.
Who, Ken doll dipshit?
Talk about out to lunch.
No wonder the service sucks.
The deadbeat's got nothin'
on these fucking cater waiters.
Well, what do you expect
from a bunch
of unemployed actors?
You an actor?
- I'm a--I--
- You don't look like an actor.
- I'm not a--
- He could be
a character actor,
like, plays nerds or sad sacks.
[softly] Guy who looks up
before the comet hits.
- What'd he say?
- I'm sorry.
Say that again, Dan? [laughs]
[normally] Guy who looks up
before the comet hits.
[laughter]
Nice, Dan!
Say it louder, though.
Be proud.
No, I'm not a--
I'm a--I'm a--I have a vlog.
Issues and critiques on--
Issues and critiques, see?
I knew you weren't
some artsy fruit loop.
Uh-uh.
Hey, hey, thought I saw--
- Ron?
- Ron!
No coming into the sponsor tent
when we're doing
operation stuff!
Yeah, yeah, sure,
uh, it's just,
I saw you bring him in,
and I thought
maybe you needed me
for something.
- You knew about this?
- Well, yeah, yeah.
I was sworn to secrecy.
You know, I was sort of made
special deputy for the day.
[laughs]
[mimics guns twirling]
You're no special anything.
- Why don't you go?
- Oh.
- And don't come back.
- Unless you got some real food.
- Shrimp.
- Chicken tacos, mini hot dogs.
- Real food.
- Hot shrimp with pineapple.
Hot shrimp, you got it.
Got it, okay,
and then I'll be back.
I'll come right back
with that.
- Help, Ron!
- Roman, listen.
Jeff Daniels, find him.
And if you say a word,
there will be consequences.
You got it?
- Sackson!
- Where is he?
See? Blue!
Right, yes, right.
Okay, sponsors tent, of course.
- Yeah.
- Genius.
- Sackson, are you okay?
- Whoa!
Where do you think
you're going?
- This is the sponsors tent.
- No, no, no, no, it's okay.
We just need to check--
- Sponsors only. Get lost.
- Okay, okay.
- Okay.
- Wow.
Wow.
Whoa, that's some intense
sponsors.
Yeah. [sighs] Look, blue!
Sackson!
Are you in there? It's us.
Sackson, are you okay?
[gasps]
Wait, you were just at the bar.
And then I came here,
and now I'm heading back.
[Evie sighs]
What?
How long did it take us
to get here?
[Sackson yells]
Look, blue!
[Sackson screaming]
Look at him go.
[Sackson screaming]
What the hell?
[indistinct chatter]
[slow rock music playing
over speakers]
I've been an actor since I got
Sky Masterson as a freshman.
- Cool.
- It's who I was,
all I ever wanted to be.
And that is gone,
and I'm like--
- Who am I?
- Right?
- I've been there.
- A husband and father.
All I ever wanted to be.
[Kyle sighs]
What's up, guys?
Yeah, but that's how I learned
it's enough to be.
To be. Huh.
Yeah, I'm not
a husband and father.
- You're not an actor.
- No.
I mean,
think of all the ways
we make ourselves suffer
for the things
that we do or don't do.
Is a man what he does?
- No.
- No.
He is who he is.
[groans]
So basically, like, I am?
- Yeah.
- Oh!
[laughs]
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
What the fuck are you guys
talking about?
How it doesn't matter
what you do.
It's more--
wait, how does it go?
You are what you are.
I am what I am.
Being is the essence
of existence.
- Yeah.
- The-- uh, what?
If you don't get it,
you don't get it.
But I get it, and, man
[chuckles]
yeah.
[laughs]
[Roman laughs dryly]
Yeah, Jeff
[clears throat]
where you from?
Oh, here, there.
Mostly been ramblin'.
- Ramblin'.
- Yeah, ramblin'.
You need a vehicle for that.
Sure do.
What's your ramblin' vehicle?
- Seventy-four Nova.
- Baby.
Chevy Nova.
Loaner from my bro Dennis.
You know,
gets me from here to there.
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah.
Well, I am going to freshen up.
- Yeah.
- Gentlemen.
Keep on a-ramblin'.
Fuckin' Jeff, man!
Oh, yeah.
He's full of shit.
[as Jeff]
In time, you'll get it.
In time.
Get what?
[energetic music playing
over speaker]
♪
Off.
[music stops]
- Okay, so, Lucy--
- Oh, Ron, how's it going?
Are people having fun
with the spanashe?
Like, what's the reaction been?
It's been nothing.
No one wants spanashe.
- No one?
- No one, okay?
I just really need
something good and normal.
No one at all?
Not, like, a single person
has engaged with it?
Yeah, one guy looked at it
and threw it away.
Has no one
explained the concept?
It's an appetizer.
It's a brisk,
enlightening experience.
I'm sure
if they just understood--
Lucy, it's a luau
before a Sting concert.
No one wants to think
or see in new ways, okay?
And who-who-who would
want this, okay?
What even is it?
[plates clatter]
Exactly.
No! No, okay?
People just want
to eat a thing!
- Okay.
- Okay?
So, like, a spiced slurry
of pig faces,
feet, and end parts, salted,
in a casing tube
and fire roasted?
No, like hot dogs!
Hmm, now that looks nice.
Like a worrisome urine sample.
[groovy music playing
over speakers]
- Anything?
- I'm worried he fell in a hole.
Or he left his phone
in his pocket.
Wow, he's getting
some crazy numbers.
I lost Sackson.
No, he's fine, I'm sure.
Listen, it's not just him.
I thought it'd be cool
and interesting
to go along on his trip,
but then I got distracted
by a bush,
and then he was gone,
and then I didn't even remember
what I set out to do.
Yeah, I know.
You told me the story.
No, it's not a story.
It's a metaphor.
For what?
- I'm me
- Yeah?
and Sackson
is my younger self,
and he's interested
in new ideas
and cool world things.
Okay, and what is the bush?
The bush is money,
or it's approval.
I was always
a sucker for approval.
I don't have that worked out,
but it distracted me.
- Yes.
- And I forgot about Sackson.
And-and what's he again?
- Underwater?
- He's my past life.
- Oh.
- But I don't realize
he's gone until it's too late.
He fell in the ocean?
Right, which would represent
the endless sea
of superhero franchise IP stuff
I'm stuck in.
Or the actual ocean.
No, he drowned?
Will you watch the bar, please?
I'm on it.
All right, you stinky A-holes,
Daddy's back at the bar!
You got a lighter?
I can do something really cool
with a lighter.
Whoo-hoo,
here you go, the good stuff.
Okay, hot dogs,
mini-dillas, shrimp.
And I'm sorry for the wait.
[chuckles]
You think your deadbeats
are bad?
You don't know my crew,
a bunch of boho jabronis,
you know what I mean?
Half of America's
just assholes,
and the other half,
fuckin' assholes.
[laughter]
I mean, it's like,
amen, brother.
- Yeah.
- Deadbeats, waiters.
Same shit, different assholes.
[laughs]
Cool, man,
I got real work to do.
Okay. Oh, there he is,
our main operative!
Roman, all right,
what do we got?
- What do we got?
- Did you get anything?
- Yeah, you got anything?
- An address?
You got an address or what?
No, he's ramblin'.
- So you got a car ID?
- Yeah, what's the car ID?
- You get a car ID?
- Well
he's borrowing a car.
His bro's.
His bro
[psychedelic music plays]
Dennis.
What--
what is this?
So the car?
- Is it food?
- Ugh, exactly.
Yeah, well, this is
the good stuff right here.
Shrimp.
Hey, shrimp and pineapple.
How do you even pick it up?
- We got hot dogs
- Yoo-hoo.
Yo. [whistles]
- Car.
- Oh.
Yeah, right. Uh, '74 Nova.
- Seventy-four Chevy Nova?
- Yeah, a Nova.
Johnson, check the lot.
- Yep.
- Mattea, call in a warrant
to search that car.
Ron, more mini-dillas.
Well, I'm writing down
Chevy Nova--
- I got it.
- I'm writing down '74 Chevy--
- Get out.
- Okay.
A supernova.
That's good work, Roman.
We're finally gonna get that
son of a bitch Jeff Daniels
behind bars where he belongs.
What are you doing?
I finally cracked it.
I cracked my opus.
[chuckles]
Opus?
Supernova collapse
leads to a black hole.
A passage through space-time
connecting the future
to the past.
- I thought you do a vlog.
- Yes.
Do.
What I am is a writer.
A science fiction writer.
Like, space shit for kids?
No! A hard sci-fi--
I really thought
you were different.
Hard sci-fi.
Mattea, get him out of my tent.
Get the fuck out
of the sponsors tent!
Hold on a second.
- Sackson!
- Are you out there?
Can you hear us?
Call back to us, Sackson!
- Sackson!
- Sackson!
Sackson! Is he on the--
I can't believe
what I've done.
Is he in the cliff? Is he--
I'm the worst person
in the whole world.
What happened to me?
No, no, no, Evie--
I lost an entire guy!
No, Evie,
there are worse people.
- Not really.
- Oh, 100%.
No, name someone worse.
I don't know.
Stalin? Vlad the Impaler?
John Krasinski?
I mean,
there are terrible people--
- From The Office?
- No, no, no, no, uh
He seems so nice.
Ted Kaczynski,
Ted Kaczynski.
Where's Sackson?
- Sackson!
- Sackson!
- Sackson!
- Sackson!
Holy shit, is that--
is that his phone?
Why are we running?
Are we running?
Look! Is that his phone?
He's drowned and he's buried!
Oh, my God.
Okay, I'm just gonna
make sure it's Sackson's.
Careful!
[Evie and Henry yell]
My younger self.
- Sackson, Sackson!
- Oh, Sackson!
- Sackson, are you okay?
- Baby Evie!
Why is your phone in the ocean?
It was the numbers.
They just kept--
they kept getting higher,
and I couldn't--
I couldn't take it.
I had to throw it in there.
What?
Ah, no!
[both yelp]
If you touch it,
that stuff will get on you.
And if it's on you,
then it's--then it's on you.
- The water?
- Yes!
- The water?
- No, no, no.
[yells]
Why is he yelling?
[all yelling]
Oh, oh.
[all] Ohh
- Do you feel that?
- I feel it.
- Ohh
- Oh, so this is mushrooms.
Oh, my God, it's Sackson.
Honey.
Wow.
- "Desert Rose."
- Yeah, I got you.
"Englishman in New York."
Maybe The Police
will be there.
- Whoo!
- Hey, if you like Sting,
let me hear you scream!
[crowd cheering]
Yeah!
Man, VIP tickets to Sting.
That sure does sound cool.
[chuckles]
The bus is taking them
to jail, Ron.
I know. I just--
I'm saying it
[sighs] sounds cool.
Sounds cool.
So, we searched the Nova
and confirmed
we got the right Jeff Daniels.
- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
Thanks for the report, Officer.
Great job.
What?
Where's Jeff Daniels, Roman?
I mean, why are you asking me?
Because he's gone.
Almost like
someone tipped him off.
Oh, like someone owed him one
for showing them the way?
Well, sounds like
what you're saying is,
he fed you a line of bullshit
and you let him go.
No, that's--I--
what I said was hypothetical,
and what you're--
Oh, those.
Oh, wait, those--
what are those?
Just nothing. Why?
Oh, yes.
Uh, mm.
Mmm.
What is it?
Exactly.
Mmm.
[Lucy giggles]
Oh.
It's just paper.
[laughter]
You don't even get it!
Oh, no, I do get it!
And it's great.
No, Jeff Daniels is the
single biggest deadbeat father
west of the Rockies.
He's abandoned
four different families
with kids
he won't take credit for
in three other states.
- Four families?
- Four!
Lieutenant, we got him.
Looks like he stole a car.
We got roadblocks
up on the PCH.
Fucker swiped
some handicapped guy's car.
- Piece of shit.
- King of the assholes.
- Mm-hmm.
- Wait.
I'm a handicapped guy.
Oh, no!
It was here.
Oh, shit.
Was it a "Hyun-dai" Sonata?
I think you're
pronouncing it wrong.
- It's "Hun-dai," right?
- I think so, just "Hun-dai."
Was it a "Hyun-dai" Sonata?
[upbeat jazzy music plays]
♪
Okay!
Have a good time, everybody!
Yeah, I know I am!
But what do you mean, just be?
So you're not an actor anymore?
See, that is the thing.
I never was an actor.
It's what I did.
So what I do next
doesn't matter
because whatever I do
has nothing to do
[chuckles]
with what I am, you see?
[phone rings]
Good shrooms.
- Yeah.
- This is Kyle.
- Oh! Right, yeah, okay!
- All right, thanks.
Yeah, no problem.
Of course.
Okay, thanks.
So good news.
- Oh?
- We got Daniels,
and we recovered your car.
- Great. I just bought that car.
- Should still be usable.
Yeah, what does it cost
to fix a broken window?
- Huh.
- Hundred bucks?
One-fifty max?
But that's really pushing it.
He tried to run a roadblock,
went up the embankment,
rolled the car.
Still runs, though. I think.
[Roman giggles]
You think that's funny?
No. [laughs]
[Kyle laughs] I got it!
Lost Boys callback!
Baby, I am an actor!
[laughs]
[giggles]
Back in the game, baby!
[laughs] Let's go!
[laughs]
[engine rumbling,
crowd shouting indistinctly]
Wow.
- That was a real journey.
- Yeah.
I mean, metaphorically,
because in actual terms,
we wandered around within,
like, a half acre.
- There were solid insights.
- Yeah.
What if I quit
the whole franchise thing
and just focused on cool,
interesting stuff?
And you know what?
I'm serious
about Colonel Stryker.
We could get you
back into acting.
Henry, I'm only a little bit
on shrooms now,
so I am serious.
Okay, yeah.
I-I will think about it.
[Evie chuckles]
Oh, my God.
Have you ever
just looked at them?
Hey! Hey, guys!
Can you tell the seagull
that me and Snap
are gonna hit the road
to Blythe?
We're gonna get
some medium-sleeved shirts.
Come on, Snap, let's go.
Medium-sleeved shirts!
Medium-sleeved!
All right.
- He's fine.
- Yeah.
T-R-E-E, tree.