Young Rock (2021) s03e04 Episode Script
Night of the Chi-Chi's
1
[REGAL MUSIC]
♪
This place is beautiful. Look at that.
Mm. When I transition
from airplanes to cars,
I can't look out of a window for days.
♪
Man, that's really unfortunate,
but I'm glad you made it.
Everything good with your show?
You told them you were on a hiatus?
Yeah. "Chatterbox" will have
a guest host for a week,
either Mario Lopez or an AI influencer,
while I get back to hard journalism:
an in-depth article on Dwayne Johnson's
goodwill ambassador trip to Gjelgjiughm
with a secret agenda
of getting Prime Minister Honig
to agree on a trade deal.
I'd read that.
But only that. I think
if it went any longer,
I'd just skim it.
Hmm.
[PHONE CHIMES]
I knew I was dealing
with a reluctant subject for my piece,
but his barbs were nothing new to me.
[PHONE CHIMES]
[BIRDS SINGING]
[FLOWING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC]
[PINBALL MACHINE JANGLING]
[BELL RINGS]
♪
Welcome to Gjelgjiughm.
[LAUGHING] Oh, this is amazing.
The prime minister is very excited
to meet you, Mr. Johnson.
And unexpected friend.
Oh, um, I'm Randall Park.
I I was in "Ant-Man and the Wasp".
She's just finishing up a call,
but she thought it might be fun
for you to wait in the memorabilia room.
My name's Reid if you need anything.
It's a pleasure to have you
at the Gjelgjiughm Estate.
- Thank you, Reid.
- Yeah, thank you. [CHUCKLES]
- Oh, my God, look at this.
- Look at this.
- [BOTH LAUGH]
- Wow.
- If you smell
- What the Randall is cookin'!
[CHUCKLING] Oh, my God.
"WrestleFest".
I can't believe she has this game.
Oh, man. This takes me way back.
I remember the last time
I played this. [CHUCKLES]
[SOFT UPBEAT MUSIC]
It was the summer after
I graduated high school.
I was just a few weeks away
from heading off to Miami
to play football.
Morning, Dewey. How'd you sleep?
Terrible. There was a drunk dude
arguing with a trash can
outside my window.
He kept banging on it and yelling
for Oscar the Grouch to pop out
and fight him like a man.
So detailed.
Breakfast is ready.
- What's this?
- This is a, uh
a hash brown shaped like a stegosaurus.
How am I supposed to
bulk up for football
with this very tiny,
very cute hashbrown?
Do some push-ups?
I'm sorry. It was on sale.
We have to tighten our belts this month.
I promise you, Mom,
when I make it to the NFL,
we're never gonna have
to worry about money again.
I know, baby. Okay. I gotta go to work.
I have five houses to clean,
and I'd like to make it
to my second house
in time to catch the mailman.
Turns out the post office is dramatic,
and he has all the best gossip.
[SMOOCHES]
The age of the dinosaurs is over.
[DOOR OPENS]
[SIGHING] Whew! I'm beat.
[CHUCKLES] Hope your mama
didn't make the bed,
'cause I'm just gonna mess it up again.
Have you been out all night?
Mr. 20 Questions over here.
Yes, I was out with the guys.
My mom was killing herself working
and he was out all night?
That must have been upsetting.
I was pissed, man
[SUSPENSEFUL FUNKY MUSIC]
So when I found out later
he was going out again,
I followed him so I could
give him a piece of my mind.
Chi-Chi's?
I'm eating baby hash browns
and he's ordering
all-you-can-eat fajitas?
Hell no.
Chi-Chi's? That Tex-Mex chain?
Oh, yeah. Best and only
chimichangas in Pennsylvania.
[LIGHT MUSIC PLAYING OVER PA]
♪
Yo, Dad. Enjoying some chimichangas?
Dewey. What are you doing here?
I followed you.
You followed me?
Son, what I do is none
of your damn business.
I'm making it my business.
You're staying out all night
then treating yourself
to some hangover nachos
while Mom is working all day.
Fine, fine!
You wanna know what's going on,
I'll tell you what's going on.
It all started the other day
at this gas station.
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
Hey.
Hey! Hey, you Rocky Johnson?
- The one and only.
- [LAUGHS] Oh, man.
I thought that was you, Soulman.
Look, I used to watch you
wrestle on TV all the time.
Oh, man. You were the best.
Still am the best.
Oh, that's right, Soulman.
That's right. [LAUGHS]
Hey, hey, can I get your autograph?
Look, my wife is gonna go nuts
when I tell her I met you.
Anything for a fan.
[LAUGHS] Uh, make that out
to Gennifer with a G.
Hmm. You don't come across
that spelling too often.
Yeah. [LAUGHS]
Dad, where is this story going?
I'm gettin' there.
So um, what you been up to these days?
Oh, pfft, brother, I am here and there.
[LAUGHS] You know,
this and that, just hustlin'.
Okay, all right.
Hey, you wanna make $500?
Oh, whoa, whoa, brother.
I ain't that kinda hustler.
Oh, no. [LAUGHS] No, no, no.
What I'm sayin' is
I got a job for you, if you want one.
You ever been to Chi-Chi's?
'Course I have. Love Chi-Chi's.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Remind me what that is again.
Tex-Mex joint down
at the Lehigh Valley Mall.
Go by there tomorrow evening,
talk to the manager.
Tell him Don sent you, huh?
Don sent you?
That piece of [BLEEP]
hasn't shown up to work in three weeks,
and now he's sending people over
like he's doing me a favor?
Where is he? Because I am gonna
run him over with my car!
Hey, hey.
Let's take a breather.
[EXHALES DEEPLY] I'm sorry.
I anger quickly.
It's in my blood from my mama's side.
Sure.
But, hey, forget about Don.
You got Rocky Johnson here.
So whatever you hired Don to do,
I can do.
Do you know how
to deep clean a restaurant?
Of course I didn't know.
I ain't know a damn thing.
[SUCKS TEETH] Of course I do.
[SIGHS]
All right.
Well, Don has left me
in a bind here, so
I'm gonna give you a shot.
[SIGHS AND CHUCKLES] That's great.
- Pays 500 bucks?
- Yeah, a week, yeah.
If you do a good job.
Now, it also takes all night.
Okay, so I'm gonna have to
lock you inside the building
until morning
so you can't steal anything.
What would I steal from Chi-Chi's?
We have some fine artwork here.
Uh wait, wait, wait. [CHUCKLES]
Is it even legal
to lock someone in a building like this?
See you in the morning!
[SUSPENSEFUL FUNKY MUSIC]
- Uh
- [LOCK CLANKS]
♪
So I stayed and cleaned
through the night,
which is why I came home
looking all ragged.
Hey, hey, hey. Who's this?
This is my son. Got
an extra set of hands.
Okay, well, see you in the morning.
All right. Have a good night.
[LOCK CLANKS]
I don't know what your face looks like
when you're locked
in a Chi-Chi's all night,
that's what mine looked like.
- [BUTTONS CLACKING]
- One, two,
- three!
- Oh! My joystick got stuck.
[MOCKING] Oh, my joystick got stuck.
Come on, losers have been
saying that since '77.
Ah, I shouldn't have lotioned my hands.
Should I get back to the story?
Oh, uh, right, so, uh,
you're locked in a Chi-Chi's
with your dad.
Yes, and I am not happy about it.
[DOOR RATTLING]
[SIGHS]
I can't believe
he actually locked us in.
You got to earn the keys
to Chi-Chi's. [CHUCKLES]
I earned 'em day one.
Then lost 'em that afternoon.
Literally in a rain gutter.
- Now I gotta earn 'em again.
- Great.
Now I'm locked in here all night.
What's with you? Why you so angry?
All I'm trying to do
is help pay the bills.
I'm not gonna give you a medal
for doing what you're supposed to do.
And why'd you lie about
being out with the guys?
Were you embarrassed about working here?
No. It would just take
too much to convey.
- You heard my long-ass explanation.
- Come on, Dad.
You could've easily
shaved five minutes off that.
Don't tell a storyteller
how to tell a story.
People love long stories.
You should remember that.
[LAUGHS]
- [GASPS]
- [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
Oh, no.
Oh, my claustrophobia is setting in.
Son, come on. Help me to the bar.
I need a drink.
Wait, how could your dad
be claustrophobic
in a large space like that?
He was genuinely claustrophobic,
and it would flare up at odd times.
But I shared your skepticism.
Dad, this place is literally
three times the size of our apartment.
Hey, Dwayne,
everything's three times
the size of our apartment.
- [CAN HISSES AND SNAPS]
- [ROCKY SIGHS]
[SIGHS] That's better.
Guess that's coming off the paycheck.
Listen, I don't have
any more time for your guff.
- My guff?
- [ROCKY SIGHS]
We got work to do.
You sweep in here. I'll mop the kitchen.
[DWAYNE SIGHS]
So I got to work
until I realized
What the hell am I doing?
[BROOM CLATTERS]
[ARCADE GAME MUSIC PLAYING]
Already taking a break, huh?
You better be playing as your old man.
I'm sorry to say you are not
a character in "WrestleFest".
Yes, I am. A secret character!
You gotta unlock me.
And you can play me in jeans or trunks.
Dad, come on.
I'm serious.
Why are you always working the gimmick?
[LAUGHS] What you talkin' 'bout?
I'm not always working the gimmick.
- Ah, that's my boy.
- [LAUGHS]
Hey, and after, I promise
we'll get some ice cream.
Okay.
And when I get back,
I'm gonna get us a place
before she even gets here.
Don't worry about that.
Do you know how
to deep clean a restaurant?
Of course I do.
Okay, enough. I get it.
But I swear there is a cheat code.
Here. Move, move, move.
All right, it's, uh, up, up no.
Up, down, left, right, punch, punch
where's the start button? Uh
Dad, can you please just be honest?
[SCOFFING CHUCKLE]
What kind of question is that?
You're like that wooden puppet boy.
You know, what's his name.
Pinochilo.
It is definitely not Pinochilo.
All right, you want some honesty?
I'll give you some honesty.
Ask me anything.
Your dad really said
you could ask him anything?
- Nothing off-limits?
- Nothing.
But I wasn't sure if I could trust him,
so I set a little trap and
I asked him a question
that I already knew the answer to.
What caused your career
to end in the WWF?
[INHALES DEEPLY]
Vince let me go because I almost agreed
to wrestle with another
promoter in Saudi Arabia,
even though I was excusive with the WWF.
And let's face it: my run
was just coming to an end.
But you already knew that, didn't you?
Yeah. Bam Bam Bigelow
told me back in Nashville.
And that's the last time I trust a man
with a flame tattoo on his head.
But, hey, I told the truth. You happy?
I'm more surprised you didn't
take an hour to explain it.
Oh, I can give you
that version, too, Son.
Dad, it's okay. I got the gist.
Well, all right, then.
We got a restaurant to clean.
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
And if you help me
I'll answer any question you got.
Honestly.
Deal?
Game on.
So all those times
you swore off drinking,
- did you ever actually quit?
- Sure did.
Back in '86, I quit for a few months.
[CHUCKLES] Weeks.
Three days?
When I was in second grade,
you said you couldn't help me
with my solar system diorama
because of arthritis.
Was that true?
Nope.
I just don't believe
in Jupiter's rings, Son.
And I didn't wanna get
into that with a kid.
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Have you ever stolen anything?
Besides a few girl's hearts?
[CHUCKLES]
Yes. Yes, I have.
I remember the first time I stole.
It was a bottle of Tums
that I stuffed down my pants.
But I got caught by the store employee.
Damn things made too much noise.
Who steals Tums?
I was six, Son.
I thought they was candy.
My dad was finally
opening up, so I did, too.
Hiding the goods in your pants.
That's amateur hour, Dad.
Eh, what do you know?
I know shoplifters
are always trying to hide
what they're stealing, which
makes 'em seem more suspicious.
When I steal stuff, I just
act like I already own it.
You steal?
How do you think I got
all those nice clothes?
I don't know. I don't think
about your clothes.
But that being said,
you're grounded for a week.
[LAUGHS] Mom already
punished me for that.
Took all my nice clothes to Goodwill.
Mom did?
Oh, she didn't even tell me.
Look at her protecting you.
Ooh, speaking of your mom,
you know her favorite earrings
she's always wearing?
The corn ones.
What woman's gonna wear corn earrings?
Those are pineapples, Son.
Anyway, I lifted those
from Montgomery Ward's.
- Shoved 'em down my pants.
- What?
- Wait, and Mom knows this?
- Oh, hell no.
This was early in our relationship.
Boy, I really wanted to impress her.
- I guess it worked.
- You bet your ass, it did.
[BOTH LAUGH]
So do you really work
the whole time you're here?
Chimichangas up! [LAUGHS]
Guess that's coming out
of your paycheck, too.
No. Manager said I could eat
whatever I want
while I'm working.
[BLOWING]
Oh, wow!
That's really good!
Hey, you should try fried ice cream.
[UPBEAT PERCUSSIVE MUSIC]
You can fry ice cream?
You can deep fry anything, Son.
Watch this.
- How about some fried salad?
- Mm-hmm.
[CHUCKLES]
♪
[OIL BUBBLING LOUDLY]
Oh, ooh! The oil's angry!
Ah! It burns!
Add more stuff! That'll calm it down!
♪
[LAUGHTER]
[CRUNCHING]
Mm.
This is definitely proof that
you can't deep fry everything.
It tastes delicious to me.
That fried coating adds a nice
pork flavor to the lettuce.
I told the manager about it last week.
He putting it on the menu.
See, there you go again with the lies.
Oh, take it easy.
I'm not lying. It's just spin.
- Here we go.
- Listen.
There are various degrees of lying,
and they should not be treated the same.
Haven't you ever heard
of the lie pyramid?
At the bottom, there's spin.
That's just like working a gimmick.
Then, we have a white lie,
inconsequential lie, lie of omission,
and at the tippy top of that bad boy
- is a bald-faced lie.
- [SCOFFS]
Me, I'm mostly spinning.
Seems like you've put
a lot of thought into this.
Eh, lotta downtime on the road.
[LAUGHS]
But hey, sometimes a lie
makes life a little easier.
- Yeah, for you.
- No, everybody.
Remember your ex-girlfriend Karen?
You told me you broke up with her.
But you didn't, did you?
- Yeah, she dumped me.
- Ah, see?
But it was easier to tell people
it was the other way around.
Okay. Maybe you have a point.
Mm.
But how'd you know I lied about that?
I'm an emotionally intelligent person.
Also, Karen was way outta your league,
and that's the truth.
[BOTH LAUGH]
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
I'm just sayin', sparkling water
should cost less because it's half air.
I like your thinking, Son.
♪
Hey, now let me ask you a question.
Shoot.
When'd you stop looking up to your pops?
What?
You used to be my biggest fan.
- I'm still your biggest fan.
- Eh.
We both know it's not the same.
Was it when I started
wrestling in flea markets?
Hey, we're being honest tonight, right?
I have always loved
watching you wrestle.
Still do.
Doesn't matter where or for who.
Oh, no.
It's because you saw me cry
when we watched "The Fly".
That was surprising.
That poor baboon got turned inside out.
Look, it wasn't just one thing, okay?
It was a slow build over time.
Come on, Son.
When did it start?
All right. Want the truth?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I guess when I realized
that you weren't, like,
the superhero.
You're just a guy.
Just a guy cleaning a restaurant, huh?
You're embarrassed by that?
I'm not saying that, but
But what?
[SCOFFS]
[SOMBER MUSIC]
♪
You just gonna ignore me all night?
♪
I know you're upset, but
how am I supposed to feel?
We can barely make rent, and I'm eating
discount dinosaur hash browns
for breakfast.
♪
Look, at the end of the day,
I know you're trying
to make things better.
I appreciate you doing what
you can do to support us,
including this job at Chi-Chi's.
You don't have to spin this, Son.
- I'm not spinning.
- Yes, you are.
You're spinning it
to make me feel better.
What do you mean?
I've made more than
a few mistakes, Dewey.
What happened in Saudi Arabia,
Nashville.
I put our family in this position.
I looked out for myself
and hurt the people
I was supposed to protect.
♪
So was this the first time
your dad was real with you like that?
Honestly, I think
this was the first time
he had been truly real with himself.
[BUTTONS CLICKING]
I waited 16 years
to have a moment like that.
And that really meant something to me.
It meant that maybe I could trust him.
Mm. Good for Rocky.
Eh. It only lasted a second.
[LAUGHS]
You gonna say something or
just look at me all bug-eyed?
No. I think you said it all.
Good.
And, hey
- you're welcome.
- For what?
If I didn't create
these challenges for you,
you wouldn't have that huge
chip on your shoulder.
How is that a good thing?
It pushed you to work
your ass off, didn't it?
And now you're going to Miami, baby,
so yeah, you're welcome.
Are you seriously trying to take credit
for me playing football for the Canes?
Hell yeah, I am.
[BOTH LAUGH]
I thought we weren't spinning anymore.
I know, I know.
[BUTTONS CLICKING]
You gotta admit, this game
would be a lot better
- if I was in it.
- [SCOFFS]
You say that about every game.
You even said that about chess.
Why shouldn't Rocky Johnson be a knight?
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, shoot. The boss is here!
Quick, get the ice cream!
You said we could eat whatever we want,
as long as it
that was a lie, wasn't it?
Of course it was a lie!
You think Chi-Chi's is just
giving away free food?
Come on! I thought
you was going to college.
Okay, everything looks good.
My beautiful paintings are still here.
- You did a good job, guys.
- Thank you.
Make sure to let me know
you got the paycheck, okay?
- I put it in the mail.
- Appreciate that.
Come on, Dewey. Let's go.
You know, you shouldn't be
locking people
- in this restaurant.
- I said let's go.
That painting is ugly.
Kid's nuts.
- Hey, babe.
- Before Dad tries to spin anything,
we were at Chi-Chi's all night cleaning.
She knows that, Son.
I don't know what you said.
We got your first paycheck
from Chi-chi's,
but I think something's wrong.
Oh, this can't be right.
Don't tell me they took out
the drinks and the food.
This is a check for $8,000.
[DIAL TONE BUZZING]
- Dad, what are you doing?
- [DIALING TONES CHIMING]
Don't tell the manager.
He's gonna take the money back.
Hey, I did honest work.
I want honest pay.
- [LINE TRILLING]
- Hey, it's Rocky Johnson.
I got my check,
and I think you have a sticky zero
on your keyboard over there.
Yeah, well, I included
all of Don's backpay.
That piece of [BLEEP] never showed up
to pick up his checks,
so I am happy you're getting his money.
Oh, okay. Hey, I'm more
than happy to take it.
- Thank you.
- I'll bet you are. Enjoy.
Carlos!
It's real! It's our money!
- Oh, my God!
- [LAUGHTER]
- Oh, it's a miracle.
- Oh.
Look who's taking care
of the family now!
[LAUGHS] This is why you always
talk to strangers at gas stations.
- That really happened?
- It did.
And that money really saved us, man.
Do you know, in a way, that night
that my dad and I spent in Chi-Chi's,
- it might've saved us, too.
- Huh.
That's an amazing story, Dwayne.
I can't believe your dad ooh!
I just pinned your ass!
- Come on!
- Yes, yes, yes!
I did it! Me and Mr. Perfect did it.
I was trying to tell a story.
And it was a great one.
[LAUGHS] Hey, Prime Minister.
I am so sorry to listen in,
but I just didn't want to interrupt.
Not at all. It's a real
pleasure to meet you.
Oh, it is a pleasure
to meet you, as well.
- I really am a fan.
- It's an honor. Thank you.
You know, you can tell
the makeup of a person
not only by how they handle
life's tough moments,
but also how they handle the victories.
Is that a line from "Jumanji"?
- Man, come on.
- No, I just said that now
because you weren't
a very gracious winner.
Not very gracious.
Oh [STAMMERS]
- Well, he was beating me all day.
- [SCOFFS]
Prime Minister, we were just
admiring the room.
- It's very impressive.
- Thank you.
And I am looking forward
to talking with you
about that and so much more
at tonight's welcome dinner.
- Can't wait.
- Okay.
I had them place my name
placard right next to yours.
- Hey, side by side.
- [LAUGHTER]
Um, do I get a placard?
I have no idea.
If you like, I can request our chefs
to make you some fried ice cream
- just like at Chi-Chi's.
- Wow!
Oh. What ever happened to Chi-Chi's?
That chain used to be so popular.
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- You know, I don't know.
- Hmm.
[SOMBER MANDOLIN MUSIC]
♪
I think that's a good idea.
[REGAL MUSIC]
♪
This place is beautiful. Look at that.
Mm. When I transition
from airplanes to cars,
I can't look out of a window for days.
♪
Man, that's really unfortunate,
but I'm glad you made it.
Everything good with your show?
You told them you were on a hiatus?
Yeah. "Chatterbox" will have
a guest host for a week,
either Mario Lopez or an AI influencer,
while I get back to hard journalism:
an in-depth article on Dwayne Johnson's
goodwill ambassador trip to Gjelgjiughm
with a secret agenda
of getting Prime Minister Honig
to agree on a trade deal.
I'd read that.
But only that. I think
if it went any longer,
I'd just skim it.
Hmm.
[PHONE CHIMES]
I knew I was dealing
with a reluctant subject for my piece,
but his barbs were nothing new to me.
[PHONE CHIMES]
[BIRDS SINGING]
[FLOWING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC]
[PINBALL MACHINE JANGLING]
[BELL RINGS]
♪
Welcome to Gjelgjiughm.
[LAUGHING] Oh, this is amazing.
The prime minister is very excited
to meet you, Mr. Johnson.
And unexpected friend.
Oh, um, I'm Randall Park.
I I was in "Ant-Man and the Wasp".
She's just finishing up a call,
but she thought it might be fun
for you to wait in the memorabilia room.
My name's Reid if you need anything.
It's a pleasure to have you
at the Gjelgjiughm Estate.
- Thank you, Reid.
- Yeah, thank you. [CHUCKLES]
- Oh, my God, look at this.
- Look at this.
- [BOTH LAUGH]
- Wow.
- If you smell
- What the Randall is cookin'!
[CHUCKLING] Oh, my God.
"WrestleFest".
I can't believe she has this game.
Oh, man. This takes me way back.
I remember the last time
I played this. [CHUCKLES]
[SOFT UPBEAT MUSIC]
It was the summer after
I graduated high school.
I was just a few weeks away
from heading off to Miami
to play football.
Morning, Dewey. How'd you sleep?
Terrible. There was a drunk dude
arguing with a trash can
outside my window.
He kept banging on it and yelling
for Oscar the Grouch to pop out
and fight him like a man.
So detailed.
Breakfast is ready.
- What's this?
- This is a, uh
a hash brown shaped like a stegosaurus.
How am I supposed to
bulk up for football
with this very tiny,
very cute hashbrown?
Do some push-ups?
I'm sorry. It was on sale.
We have to tighten our belts this month.
I promise you, Mom,
when I make it to the NFL,
we're never gonna have
to worry about money again.
I know, baby. Okay. I gotta go to work.
I have five houses to clean,
and I'd like to make it
to my second house
in time to catch the mailman.
Turns out the post office is dramatic,
and he has all the best gossip.
[SMOOCHES]
The age of the dinosaurs is over.
[DOOR OPENS]
[SIGHING] Whew! I'm beat.
[CHUCKLES] Hope your mama
didn't make the bed,
'cause I'm just gonna mess it up again.
Have you been out all night?
Mr. 20 Questions over here.
Yes, I was out with the guys.
My mom was killing herself working
and he was out all night?
That must have been upsetting.
I was pissed, man
[SUSPENSEFUL FUNKY MUSIC]
So when I found out later
he was going out again,
I followed him so I could
give him a piece of my mind.
Chi-Chi's?
I'm eating baby hash browns
and he's ordering
all-you-can-eat fajitas?
Hell no.
Chi-Chi's? That Tex-Mex chain?
Oh, yeah. Best and only
chimichangas in Pennsylvania.
[LIGHT MUSIC PLAYING OVER PA]
♪
Yo, Dad. Enjoying some chimichangas?
Dewey. What are you doing here?
I followed you.
You followed me?
Son, what I do is none
of your damn business.
I'm making it my business.
You're staying out all night
then treating yourself
to some hangover nachos
while Mom is working all day.
Fine, fine!
You wanna know what's going on,
I'll tell you what's going on.
It all started the other day
at this gas station.
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
Hey.
Hey! Hey, you Rocky Johnson?
- The one and only.
- [LAUGHS] Oh, man.
I thought that was you, Soulman.
Look, I used to watch you
wrestle on TV all the time.
Oh, man. You were the best.
Still am the best.
Oh, that's right, Soulman.
That's right. [LAUGHS]
Hey, hey, can I get your autograph?
Look, my wife is gonna go nuts
when I tell her I met you.
Anything for a fan.
[LAUGHS] Uh, make that out
to Gennifer with a G.
Hmm. You don't come across
that spelling too often.
Yeah. [LAUGHS]
Dad, where is this story going?
I'm gettin' there.
So um, what you been up to these days?
Oh, pfft, brother, I am here and there.
[LAUGHS] You know,
this and that, just hustlin'.
Okay, all right.
Hey, you wanna make $500?
Oh, whoa, whoa, brother.
I ain't that kinda hustler.
Oh, no. [LAUGHS] No, no, no.
What I'm sayin' is
I got a job for you, if you want one.
You ever been to Chi-Chi's?
'Course I have. Love Chi-Chi's.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Remind me what that is again.
Tex-Mex joint down
at the Lehigh Valley Mall.
Go by there tomorrow evening,
talk to the manager.
Tell him Don sent you, huh?
Don sent you?
That piece of [BLEEP]
hasn't shown up to work in three weeks,
and now he's sending people over
like he's doing me a favor?
Where is he? Because I am gonna
run him over with my car!
Hey, hey.
Let's take a breather.
[EXHALES DEEPLY] I'm sorry.
I anger quickly.
It's in my blood from my mama's side.
Sure.
But, hey, forget about Don.
You got Rocky Johnson here.
So whatever you hired Don to do,
I can do.
Do you know how
to deep clean a restaurant?
Of course I didn't know.
I ain't know a damn thing.
[SUCKS TEETH] Of course I do.
[SIGHS]
All right.
Well, Don has left me
in a bind here, so
I'm gonna give you a shot.
[SIGHS AND CHUCKLES] That's great.
- Pays 500 bucks?
- Yeah, a week, yeah.
If you do a good job.
Now, it also takes all night.
Okay, so I'm gonna have to
lock you inside the building
until morning
so you can't steal anything.
What would I steal from Chi-Chi's?
We have some fine artwork here.
Uh wait, wait, wait. [CHUCKLES]
Is it even legal
to lock someone in a building like this?
See you in the morning!
[SUSPENSEFUL FUNKY MUSIC]
- Uh
- [LOCK CLANKS]
♪
So I stayed and cleaned
through the night,
which is why I came home
looking all ragged.
Hey, hey, hey. Who's this?
This is my son. Got
an extra set of hands.
Okay, well, see you in the morning.
All right. Have a good night.
[LOCK CLANKS]
I don't know what your face looks like
when you're locked
in a Chi-Chi's all night,
that's what mine looked like.
- [BUTTONS CLACKING]
- One, two,
- three!
- Oh! My joystick got stuck.
[MOCKING] Oh, my joystick got stuck.
Come on, losers have been
saying that since '77.
Ah, I shouldn't have lotioned my hands.
Should I get back to the story?
Oh, uh, right, so, uh,
you're locked in a Chi-Chi's
with your dad.
Yes, and I am not happy about it.
[DOOR RATTLING]
[SIGHS]
I can't believe
he actually locked us in.
You got to earn the keys
to Chi-Chi's. [CHUCKLES]
I earned 'em day one.
Then lost 'em that afternoon.
Literally in a rain gutter.
- Now I gotta earn 'em again.
- Great.
Now I'm locked in here all night.
What's with you? Why you so angry?
All I'm trying to do
is help pay the bills.
I'm not gonna give you a medal
for doing what you're supposed to do.
And why'd you lie about
being out with the guys?
Were you embarrassed about working here?
No. It would just take
too much to convey.
- You heard my long-ass explanation.
- Come on, Dad.
You could've easily
shaved five minutes off that.
Don't tell a storyteller
how to tell a story.
People love long stories.
You should remember that.
[LAUGHS]
- [GASPS]
- [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
Oh, no.
Oh, my claustrophobia is setting in.
Son, come on. Help me to the bar.
I need a drink.
Wait, how could your dad
be claustrophobic
in a large space like that?
He was genuinely claustrophobic,
and it would flare up at odd times.
But I shared your skepticism.
Dad, this place is literally
three times the size of our apartment.
Hey, Dwayne,
everything's three times
the size of our apartment.
- [CAN HISSES AND SNAPS]
- [ROCKY SIGHS]
[SIGHS] That's better.
Guess that's coming off the paycheck.
Listen, I don't have
any more time for your guff.
- My guff?
- [ROCKY SIGHS]
We got work to do.
You sweep in here. I'll mop the kitchen.
[DWAYNE SIGHS]
So I got to work
until I realized
What the hell am I doing?
[BROOM CLATTERS]
[ARCADE GAME MUSIC PLAYING]
Already taking a break, huh?
You better be playing as your old man.
I'm sorry to say you are not
a character in "WrestleFest".
Yes, I am. A secret character!
You gotta unlock me.
And you can play me in jeans or trunks.
Dad, come on.
I'm serious.
Why are you always working the gimmick?
[LAUGHS] What you talkin' 'bout?
I'm not always working the gimmick.
- Ah, that's my boy.
- [LAUGHS]
Hey, and after, I promise
we'll get some ice cream.
Okay.
And when I get back,
I'm gonna get us a place
before she even gets here.
Don't worry about that.
Do you know how
to deep clean a restaurant?
Of course I do.
Okay, enough. I get it.
But I swear there is a cheat code.
Here. Move, move, move.
All right, it's, uh, up, up no.
Up, down, left, right, punch, punch
where's the start button? Uh
Dad, can you please just be honest?
[SCOFFING CHUCKLE]
What kind of question is that?
You're like that wooden puppet boy.
You know, what's his name.
Pinochilo.
It is definitely not Pinochilo.
All right, you want some honesty?
I'll give you some honesty.
Ask me anything.
Your dad really said
you could ask him anything?
- Nothing off-limits?
- Nothing.
But I wasn't sure if I could trust him,
so I set a little trap and
I asked him a question
that I already knew the answer to.
What caused your career
to end in the WWF?
[INHALES DEEPLY]
Vince let me go because I almost agreed
to wrestle with another
promoter in Saudi Arabia,
even though I was excusive with the WWF.
And let's face it: my run
was just coming to an end.
But you already knew that, didn't you?
Yeah. Bam Bam Bigelow
told me back in Nashville.
And that's the last time I trust a man
with a flame tattoo on his head.
But, hey, I told the truth. You happy?
I'm more surprised you didn't
take an hour to explain it.
Oh, I can give you
that version, too, Son.
Dad, it's okay. I got the gist.
Well, all right, then.
We got a restaurant to clean.
[SIGHS SOFTLY]
And if you help me
I'll answer any question you got.
Honestly.
Deal?
Game on.
So all those times
you swore off drinking,
- did you ever actually quit?
- Sure did.
Back in '86, I quit for a few months.
[CHUCKLES] Weeks.
Three days?
When I was in second grade,
you said you couldn't help me
with my solar system diorama
because of arthritis.
Was that true?
Nope.
I just don't believe
in Jupiter's rings, Son.
And I didn't wanna get
into that with a kid.
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Have you ever stolen anything?
Besides a few girl's hearts?
[CHUCKLES]
Yes. Yes, I have.
I remember the first time I stole.
It was a bottle of Tums
that I stuffed down my pants.
But I got caught by the store employee.
Damn things made too much noise.
Who steals Tums?
I was six, Son.
I thought they was candy.
My dad was finally
opening up, so I did, too.
Hiding the goods in your pants.
That's amateur hour, Dad.
Eh, what do you know?
I know shoplifters
are always trying to hide
what they're stealing, which
makes 'em seem more suspicious.
When I steal stuff, I just
act like I already own it.
You steal?
How do you think I got
all those nice clothes?
I don't know. I don't think
about your clothes.
But that being said,
you're grounded for a week.
[LAUGHS] Mom already
punished me for that.
Took all my nice clothes to Goodwill.
Mom did?
Oh, she didn't even tell me.
Look at her protecting you.
Ooh, speaking of your mom,
you know her favorite earrings
she's always wearing?
The corn ones.
What woman's gonna wear corn earrings?
Those are pineapples, Son.
Anyway, I lifted those
from Montgomery Ward's.
- Shoved 'em down my pants.
- What?
- Wait, and Mom knows this?
- Oh, hell no.
This was early in our relationship.
Boy, I really wanted to impress her.
- I guess it worked.
- You bet your ass, it did.
[BOTH LAUGH]
So do you really work
the whole time you're here?
Chimichangas up! [LAUGHS]
Guess that's coming out
of your paycheck, too.
No. Manager said I could eat
whatever I want
while I'm working.
[BLOWING]
Oh, wow!
That's really good!
Hey, you should try fried ice cream.
[UPBEAT PERCUSSIVE MUSIC]
You can fry ice cream?
You can deep fry anything, Son.
Watch this.
- How about some fried salad?
- Mm-hmm.
[CHUCKLES]
♪
[OIL BUBBLING LOUDLY]
Oh, ooh! The oil's angry!
Ah! It burns!
Add more stuff! That'll calm it down!
♪
[LAUGHTER]
[CRUNCHING]
Mm.
This is definitely proof that
you can't deep fry everything.
It tastes delicious to me.
That fried coating adds a nice
pork flavor to the lettuce.
I told the manager about it last week.
He putting it on the menu.
See, there you go again with the lies.
Oh, take it easy.
I'm not lying. It's just spin.
- Here we go.
- Listen.
There are various degrees of lying,
and they should not be treated the same.
Haven't you ever heard
of the lie pyramid?
At the bottom, there's spin.
That's just like working a gimmick.
Then, we have a white lie,
inconsequential lie, lie of omission,
and at the tippy top of that bad boy
- is a bald-faced lie.
- [SCOFFS]
Me, I'm mostly spinning.
Seems like you've put
a lot of thought into this.
Eh, lotta downtime on the road.
[LAUGHS]
But hey, sometimes a lie
makes life a little easier.
- Yeah, for you.
- No, everybody.
Remember your ex-girlfriend Karen?
You told me you broke up with her.
But you didn't, did you?
- Yeah, she dumped me.
- Ah, see?
But it was easier to tell people
it was the other way around.
Okay. Maybe you have a point.
Mm.
But how'd you know I lied about that?
I'm an emotionally intelligent person.
Also, Karen was way outta your league,
and that's the truth.
[BOTH LAUGH]
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
I'm just sayin', sparkling water
should cost less because it's half air.
I like your thinking, Son.
♪
Hey, now let me ask you a question.
Shoot.
When'd you stop looking up to your pops?
What?
You used to be my biggest fan.
- I'm still your biggest fan.
- Eh.
We both know it's not the same.
Was it when I started
wrestling in flea markets?
Hey, we're being honest tonight, right?
I have always loved
watching you wrestle.
Still do.
Doesn't matter where or for who.
Oh, no.
It's because you saw me cry
when we watched "The Fly".
That was surprising.
That poor baboon got turned inside out.
Look, it wasn't just one thing, okay?
It was a slow build over time.
Come on, Son.
When did it start?
All right. Want the truth?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I guess when I realized
that you weren't, like,
the superhero.
You're just a guy.
Just a guy cleaning a restaurant, huh?
You're embarrassed by that?
I'm not saying that, but
But what?
[SCOFFS]
[SOMBER MUSIC]
♪
You just gonna ignore me all night?
♪
I know you're upset, but
how am I supposed to feel?
We can barely make rent, and I'm eating
discount dinosaur hash browns
for breakfast.
♪
Look, at the end of the day,
I know you're trying
to make things better.
I appreciate you doing what
you can do to support us,
including this job at Chi-Chi's.
You don't have to spin this, Son.
- I'm not spinning.
- Yes, you are.
You're spinning it
to make me feel better.
What do you mean?
I've made more than
a few mistakes, Dewey.
What happened in Saudi Arabia,
Nashville.
I put our family in this position.
I looked out for myself
and hurt the people
I was supposed to protect.
♪
So was this the first time
your dad was real with you like that?
Honestly, I think
this was the first time
he had been truly real with himself.
[BUTTONS CLICKING]
I waited 16 years
to have a moment like that.
And that really meant something to me.
It meant that maybe I could trust him.
Mm. Good for Rocky.
Eh. It only lasted a second.
[LAUGHS]
You gonna say something or
just look at me all bug-eyed?
No. I think you said it all.
Good.
And, hey
- you're welcome.
- For what?
If I didn't create
these challenges for you,
you wouldn't have that huge
chip on your shoulder.
How is that a good thing?
It pushed you to work
your ass off, didn't it?
And now you're going to Miami, baby,
so yeah, you're welcome.
Are you seriously trying to take credit
for me playing football for the Canes?
Hell yeah, I am.
[BOTH LAUGH]
I thought we weren't spinning anymore.
I know, I know.
[BUTTONS CLICKING]
You gotta admit, this game
would be a lot better
- if I was in it.
- [SCOFFS]
You say that about every game.
You even said that about chess.
Why shouldn't Rocky Johnson be a knight?
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, shoot. The boss is here!
Quick, get the ice cream!
You said we could eat whatever we want,
as long as it
that was a lie, wasn't it?
Of course it was a lie!
You think Chi-Chi's is just
giving away free food?
Come on! I thought
you was going to college.
Okay, everything looks good.
My beautiful paintings are still here.
- You did a good job, guys.
- Thank you.
Make sure to let me know
you got the paycheck, okay?
- I put it in the mail.
- Appreciate that.
Come on, Dewey. Let's go.
You know, you shouldn't be
locking people
- in this restaurant.
- I said let's go.
That painting is ugly.
Kid's nuts.
- Hey, babe.
- Before Dad tries to spin anything,
we were at Chi-Chi's all night cleaning.
She knows that, Son.
I don't know what you said.
We got your first paycheck
from Chi-chi's,
but I think something's wrong.
Oh, this can't be right.
Don't tell me they took out
the drinks and the food.
This is a check for $8,000.
[DIAL TONE BUZZING]
- Dad, what are you doing?
- [DIALING TONES CHIMING]
Don't tell the manager.
He's gonna take the money back.
Hey, I did honest work.
I want honest pay.
- [LINE TRILLING]
- Hey, it's Rocky Johnson.
I got my check,
and I think you have a sticky zero
on your keyboard over there.
Yeah, well, I included
all of Don's backpay.
That piece of [BLEEP] never showed up
to pick up his checks,
so I am happy you're getting his money.
Oh, okay. Hey, I'm more
than happy to take it.
- Thank you.
- I'll bet you are. Enjoy.
Carlos!
It's real! It's our money!
- Oh, my God!
- [LAUGHTER]
- Oh, it's a miracle.
- Oh.
Look who's taking care
of the family now!
[LAUGHS] This is why you always
talk to strangers at gas stations.
- That really happened?
- It did.
And that money really saved us, man.
Do you know, in a way, that night
that my dad and I spent in Chi-Chi's,
- it might've saved us, too.
- Huh.
That's an amazing story, Dwayne.
I can't believe your dad ooh!
I just pinned your ass!
- Come on!
- Yes, yes, yes!
I did it! Me and Mr. Perfect did it.
I was trying to tell a story.
And it was a great one.
[LAUGHS] Hey, Prime Minister.
I am so sorry to listen in,
but I just didn't want to interrupt.
Not at all. It's a real
pleasure to meet you.
Oh, it is a pleasure
to meet you, as well.
- I really am a fan.
- It's an honor. Thank you.
You know, you can tell
the makeup of a person
not only by how they handle
life's tough moments,
but also how they handle the victories.
Is that a line from "Jumanji"?
- Man, come on.
- No, I just said that now
because you weren't
a very gracious winner.
Not very gracious.
Oh [STAMMERS]
- Well, he was beating me all day.
- [SCOFFS]
Prime Minister, we were just
admiring the room.
- It's very impressive.
- Thank you.
And I am looking forward
to talking with you
about that and so much more
at tonight's welcome dinner.
- Can't wait.
- Okay.
I had them place my name
placard right next to yours.
- Hey, side by side.
- [LAUGHTER]
Um, do I get a placard?
I have no idea.
If you like, I can request our chefs
to make you some fried ice cream
- just like at Chi-Chi's.
- Wow!
Oh. What ever happened to Chi-Chi's?
That chain used to be so popular.
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- You know, I don't know.
- Hmm.
[SOMBER MANDOLIN MUSIC]
♪
I think that's a good idea.