Bones s03e05 Episode Script
Mummy in the Maze
Come, my brave children, to the hideous halloween maze.
Avoid the creepies and the crawlies that live in every dark corner of the maze.
And the first one to reach the center and emerge alive will win the grand prize.
Oh, here we go.
Where am I? somebody help me! Right this way, miss.
Now that is an excellent costume.
What are you wearing? What? Now? No, not now.
To the jeffersonian halloween ball.
What I always wear.
Are you going this year? I'm the official unofficial fbi liaison to the jeffersonian.
Of course I'm going.
We just passed the wolman.
Go straight towards the guillotine and veer left.
It's a maze.
What can I do? Dr.
Potoska, how were the remains discovered? A kid passed out.
What killed him? The kid didn't die.
He just fainted.
Then why am I here? Well, when matty fainted, I was here with my own kids.
I'm a pediatrician, but I'm also the coroner.
Small town.
Yeah, well, matty revived easily enough.
Uh, he's what you call a nervous type kid.
But then I saw what it was that made him faint in the first place and I almost fainted, too, because it was a mummy, which I told the sheriff, who called the fbi, who called the jeffersonian.
And now here we are, lost in this stupid maze looking for the mummy.
A mummy? Yeah, I do not see a guillotine.
What do you call that? a cowboy? No, it's a scarecrow.
Look, just keep turning to the right, all right? Let me know when you reach the dragon.
Uh, dead end with teeth.
That's because you turned left at the goblin.
You were supposed to turn right.
Look, when you say a mummy, you mean, uh Wrapped in bandages, curse of king tut.
You know, a mummy.
No offense, but I'm not certain a pediatrician is qualified pediatrician and coroner.
See that?Yeah okay, we are at the electric chair.
There's an electric chair? Look, just tell the guy to throw his flashlight up in the air, will ya? Uh, the fbi requests that you toss your flashlight into the air.
Ten-four.
There it is.
Oh, let's see if we can get there this way.
Guys.
After you.
What do you think, bones? ocular contents dry, reubits collapsed leathery skin these are actual human remains.
A mummy.
How long will it take to get out of this maze? Not as long as you might think.
Takes a steady flow of dry air over a long period of time to achieve this kind of desiccated mummification.
The incan ice woman of peru.
The tarim basin mummies of china.
The peat bog tollund man in denmark.
How old are we talking? Buttons zipper, rivets she's probably wearing jeans.
So, freakozoid murder-mummification rather than fascinating history? She? Shape of the innominate bone indicates female.
Now listen, boys.
The jeffersonian halloween party- it's compulsory.
Donors, patrons, angels, benefactors.
So we all show up in costume and do our duty.
I don't want any argument o i will be the back end of a cow.
So no costume.
Naomi from paleontology has agreed to be my front.
Ah, so many jokes, so little time.
It's fine.
We're all in.
I'll be edward john smith for halloween.
Ill-fated captain of the titanic.
What about angela and dr.
Brennan? Dr.
Brennan always wears the same costume to these things.
She loves it.
Help me remove these.
Ooh, what's with the smell? Cedar oil? Also used in mummification.
What about this clear coating over the skin? Lacquer.
She was painted to death? The clothing came from a church-run thrift store.
How could you possibly know that? There is no bug or slime specific to church thrift stores.
You don't know that.
I'm the bug and slime guy.
You're just the auxiliary bone guy who dresses up like the back end of a cow.
Hodgins? Free church of america thrift store, huh? Tell booth.
I knew it wasn't bugs or slime.
No you didn't, and that's what makes me king of the lab! A loyal servant of the empress.
Clothes from this ministry were found on a dead body? Well, I'm afraid that happens fairly often.
Why? Because we're a charitable congregation.
Homeless people know that we'll provide them with what they need.
Do you, by any chance, remember these specific pieces of clothing? This is from your murder victim? Pastor jonas? Do you have anything like this in red? You're looking for something that screams satan, right? Basically.
I think we have a pink cape in the back.
Maybe we can dye it.
What kind of church dresses kids like satanists? Let me show you.
At halloween we do a hell house.
Fornication, theft, murder, gambling, usury, sodomy, abortion.
It's kind of horrific, isn't it? Well, abandoning the path of righteousness is horrific, dr.
Brennan.
This is our way of remaking a pagan holiday- halloween, into a positive celebration of christian values.
Excellent prostitute, stephanie.
Anyone ever dress like a mummy? We've never featured a false idol room, though, now that you mention it, it's not a bad idea.
Ancient egyptian religious beliefs endured for almost 4,000 years.
Twice the length of christianity.
Look, any of your kids suddenly disappear? No.
What if the children that you save from abortion grow up to be users and sodomites? I don't respond to mocking semantics, dr.
Brennan.
Nor do I, but she's serious.
In that case, my serious answer would be that in being given a chance to live a life, the aborted soul will have a multitude of opportunities to repent for their sins and live bathed in the holy spirit.
- Thank you.
- Thank you? You're welcome.
My name is amber kippler.
I'm a senior investigator with doyley private investigations.
Mr.
Doyley assured me he'd be taking a personal interest in the search for Ms.
Montenegro's husband.
Interest, yes.
But I'll be doing the actual footwork.
Mr.
Doyley is taking a very personal interest.
Only not from up close.
Do you have a lot of experience at this kind of work? Angela montenegro is not your birth name.
You changed your name on your 18th birthday becaus came to you in a dream.
you never told me that.
I never told anybody that.
If I can discover something nobody knew about a client, I'm not being paid to investigate, imagine what I can do for real.
Good point.
I never told anybody about that.
Yes, you did, actually.
A girl named roxie whose heart you broke in second year art school.
Oh, roxie.
What do you know about me? Wouldn't it be better if we got to Ms.
Montenegro's husband, grayson birimbau barasa? You found something? I found the actual human man.
In florida.
In the keys.
No name key.
Very remote.
Did you talk to him? - Absolutely not.
- Why? My instructions were to locate.
That being achieved, we can now discuss contact.
We want you to contact him.
Him to sign the divorce papers.
By get him do you mean - Force him to sign them? - If necessary.
Do you have a gun? Or just remind him of who I am and ask him politely.
What are you? Canadian? We'll do this one step at a time.
- Didn't that pastor guy make you mad? - No.
He's a fundamentalist.
I appreciate consistency.
Oh, the consistency of trying to scare kids into christianity? How do we keep kids from smoking? We tell them it gives them cancer.
It does give them cancer.
According to science.
You know, that's all you care about is science.
In the end, even someone who believes in empiricism and science has to take a leap of faith.
What? I believe in what i can hear, taste, see, touch and measure.
You believe in what you feel.
Pastor jonas believes that god speaks to him through a sacred book.
I feel like we're on the wrong side of the argument here.
It's cam.
What's up? I really need you to come back.
What's going on? I got a couple here, says they think the mummy in the maze is their daughter.
Oh, that'd save us some time on identification.
Their daughter only disappeared last week.
The remains we found were at least a year old.
Look, I'm great with corpses, but when it comes to loved ones let's just say there's a reason why I'm not a pediatrician.
So if you got a siren, turn it on.
Right.
Megan is 14.
She didn't run away.
Something terrible happened.
She's a very pretty girl.
What makes you think the remains we found are your daughter? The news said that you found the body of a teenage girl in a fun house.
I suddenly knew it was megan.
Suddenly knew? Mr.
And mrs.
Shaw, it wasn't a fun house.
It was a maze.
And the remains we found are more than a year old.
- You're certain? - Yes.
I see.
I'm sorruse me.
I don't understand why you're disappointed.
Your daughter might still be alive.
Megan is not still alive.
How are you so certain? I just am, I can't explain it.
I'm her mother.
I'm sorry.
Does this face mean anything to you? No.
Does she have something to do with megan? This is the girl that we found in the maze.
definitely not megan.
Yes? Dr Brennan another mummy's been found at Shoreline Amusement park.
perhaps the fact that Megan Shaw disappeared from here and theres another mummy here is a coincidence fact Bones there are no coincidences in a murder investigation You do know the strict definition of a fact right, it's not the same as a funny feeling Just because sombody says they saw a mummy doesn't mean they actually did I know what I saw.
Keep the mask on please ma'am.
What's wrong with her? Anxiety attack bought on by this dungeon here! I spend half my time with these calls.
You know it's not real right? I mean, you're over reacting to an excessive amount of stimuli! Keep the mask in place ma'am! Perhaps you should lose some weight! - Er ma'am.
- Bones, compassion.
I'm not over reacting, there's a dead body in there A thousand of them to be exact! There's a real one, I'm a nurse, I know a dead body when I see one! Did you see anything? Not much time for that.
Just went in, got her, got her out! Great! What did you see? A corpse passed the killer clown! Clown? - You okay? - Yeah - You sure? - Sure Come on Just clown.
What's wrong? the phone rang.
It's cam on the phone.
It's ringing.
Coulrophobia.
The fear of clowns.
Coulrophobia.
It may explain why you shot that clown last year.
Look, I have no problems with clowns.
I can stand right here.
See? And the phone.
Booth.
We got an id on our maze victim off of angela's sketch.
Great.
Uh, details to follow? I think you want to hear this now.
Name's stella higgins,15 years old.
Disappeared a year ago today.
What's she saying? Id and date of disappearance of our maze victim.
Booth, stella was last seen at shoreline amusement park.
What wow? More coincidences.
thanks.
The maze victim disappeared from here.
So we just go right past the clown.
I can walk right past the clown, like she said.
Just right torture dungeon.
Yeah.
Okay.
Clowns, scary.
Not you.
Oh, gee.
You're kidding me, right? oh, look at the eye, huh? It's a ping-pong ball.
Not this one.
How do you know? Human remains, booth.
It's sort of my specialty.
this is a dead person.
The first thing booth needs to know is if this is megan shaw.
It is not megan shaw.
I agree.
It would be impossible to mummify a body like this in just a little more than a week.
Dental records do not match.
Lacquer and cedar oil.
Looks like the same murderer.
That's leaping to a conclusion.
I said looks like, zack.
Looks like is not leaping.
Her phalanges- fingers- are damaged.
Metacarpals are cracked.
You've seen something like this before? In iraq, there were some remains they had been buried alive.
This person was buried alive? I'm not comfortable it looks like this person was buried alive.
Correct? Thtattoo on the second victim's shoulder matches that of judith suzanne evans How long ago? - Two years, almost to the day.
- From? Shoreline amusement park.
She was there with her big sister and a couple of her friends.
Skin and hair removed from beneath stella's fingernails turns out to be her own.
Also, the lacquer used on both victims is completely generic.
It's widely available.
She pulled out her own hair? What makes somebody do that? There are small puncture marks, hundreds of them, all over her body.
Like insect bites, but larger.
In both cases, the lacquer was infused with a number of particulates including a spore i'm trying to identify.
Are you ready to admit that it looks like both these girls were killed and mummified by the same person? I'm not prepared to Jump to that conclusion.
Come on.
You expect me to know when one body appeared in a pile of bodies? That's not reasonable.
An actual, genuine corpse appears, and you don't notice? The place is called dungeon of a 1,000 corpses.
Which is exactly why an entire fbi forensics team is sweeping this facility.
Facility? This hole counts as a facility? I know you.
- No.
- Yeah.
You were at the maze the other night.
Same costume.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You're just recalling that, huh? - What's your name? - Gregg.
Little hint.
Fbi asks for your name, you give the whole name.
His name's gregg liscombe.
He's worked here three years.
You're not supposed to wear the costume to other gigs, dude.
Dilutes the effect.
All the other bodies are fakes, agent booth.
Okay.
We'll just keep the entire fun house as a crime scene.
Yes, sir.
In that case, can I send my people home? Oh, no.
All your people have got to talk to my people.
And you're coming with me.
Why? Two places with dead bodies, and you're standing in the doorway dressed as the grim reaper.
It's my job, man.
It's not like I adopt the persona.
Don't say anything without a lawyer, gregg.
Tell you what else, gregg's got the keys to the place.
Shut up, dan! He's got keys, too.
And so does cleaning crew.
And park security.
How about you? You got keys? I've got nothing else to say without a lawyer present! okay, that's great, pincushion, 'cause you were practically invisible until now.
Now you're bucking as number one suspect.
Judith evans, age 16, our victim from the dungeon of 1,000 corpses.
I've identified stress fractures to both tibias, as well as tears to the medial collateral and anterior cruciate ligaments in both knees.
Catcher's knee.
There's nothing in the bio about judith evans being a baseball player.
Compressions to vertebrae c1 through c7 indicate that her neck was bent like this.
But forced.
I am not liking the picture that's forming inside my head.
Phalanges cracked, and her fingernails shredded, her head forced that way, her knees jammed up against her chest.
Do we think judith evans was buried alive? I, uh, I have another bad image of how stella higgins died.
- Spiders.
- Spiders? Tarantulas, to be specific.
Poisonous spiders? That's a common misconception, though the lack of poison doesn't make the bite any less painful.
This is an urticating hair from the theraphosinae family.
It appears to be barbed.
Yeah.
It's very irritating.
Hey, little-known fact: Tarantula hair was the main ingredient in itching powder for decades.
Is there any correlation between these hairs and the fact that stella higgins scratched herself so badly, and pulled out her own hair? She's bitten all over.
There had to be dozens of tarantulas on her so, yeah, there's a correlation.
I was operating under the assumption that the mysterious spore was transported by the tarantula, but I was wrong.
How do you know? Because there's no tarantula hairs on judith evans, but plenty of the spores and particulates.
She has carcinogenic dibenzopyrene isomers, asbestos, po manganese and barium.
And steel dust.
Which adds up to Internal combustion engines.
Traffic.
Except for the steel dust.
I have no clue about the steel dust.
Well, stella's tox results show chloroform, ephedrine, theophylline, clonydine and methamphetamine.
Judith's remains show trace evidences of the same compounds, but in different concentrations.
Ephedrine is synthetic adrenaline.
Most of those are heavy stimulants.
Their metabolisms would race.
Heart rates would accelerate dangerously.
Spiders.
Live burial.
Drug-induced panic is our murderer literally scaring girls to death? I always felt, somehow, that judy was still alive, even after two years.
It's crazy, huh? Probably guilt, right? For letting my little sister out of my sight? Look, you can't blame yourself.
Did my sister suffer? You know, we got the best people in the world figuring out exactly what happened that night.
So you and your sister went to the amusement park together? Its kind of the thing to do on halloween.
My mom made me take her.
I didn't want to.
I mean, I loved judy but she was your kid sister- pain in the ass.
She made me take judy, even though I didn't want to, and mom never got over that.
How did you and judy get separated? Judy got scared.
She didn't want to go in the fun house.
Why? There was this huge monster above the door.
Judy freaked.
She said go ahead, she'd wait outside.
Judy was claustrophobic.
How bad? Pretty bad.
She wigged out when we were driving down.
There were six of us jammed in a car.
We had to stop and let her out a couple times.
Do you remember if there was a grim reaper that night at the entrance? Yeah, there was.
Could that be him? Yeah.
When we came out looking for judy, he told us she had taken off with some guy.
The police could never confirm that.
Registered sex offender.
He was present at two places where the remains of young girls were found.
Coincidence.
Statistically improbable.
Scientifically improbable but, in the real world, impossible.
Do you recognize these two girls? Man, every girl that comes in there talks to me.
I don't remember them.
Why does every girl talk to you? 'Cause I'm cute, scary.
Yeah, you do pretty well with the teenage girls, don't you, gregory? You get them all tingly? All right, that sex offender thing? It's a joke, man.
Look it up.
I got drunk, and I took a leak in a public fountain.
Yeah.
We did look it up.
There was a group of schoolgirls on the other side of that fountain.
Four times, you've been caught with your pants down, all around teenage girls.
Coincidence? Two years ago, you told this girl's sister that she took off with some guy.
Do you remember her? Yeah, sure.
It's the girl that disappeared.
The thing about you guys- you're all the same.
You sniff each other out.
Who was the guy? Judith evans disappeared october 24, two years ago.
Stella higgins, one year ago, a week before halloween.
So? So, megan shaw vanished from the same place.
You can see the common element here, can't you, gregg? - You.
- Coincidence.
There are no coincidences in a murder investigation.
Well, it's got nothing to do with me.
Geez, you can'T did you see that? Hey! Megan shaw was 14 years old.
Understand me? Who was the guy? - Good shot, bones.
- Thanks.
There was no guy! - It was lola.
- Lola? - The girl with the piercings? - Yeah.
What the hell were you doing with her? It's not what you think.
The girls come with me, maybe we get it on a little lola likes that.
Your girlfriend likes to see you with little girls? She likes to interrupt.
You know, maybe smack them around a little.
- Smack around? - Yeah.
It gets lola hot.
For us.
For later.
Sometimes, maybe she goes a little too far.
How did you get to and from a remote, nameless florida key so fast? It does have a name.
Its name is no name key.
Your confusion is natural.
Uh, did you talk to my husband? Mr.
Barasa was very pleasant.
Very pleasant.
I mean, wow! He smelled exactly like a fresh wind just after a summer storm.
You smelled him? Part of the private investigator credo, dr.
Hodgins: Insure that the client- that's you- and him.
I'm paying.
The credo says make sure the client is committed to their objective at each step.
Ergo, fresh wind after summer storm reminder.
Despite the storm, I want a divorce.
In that case, the news is disappointing.
Mr.
Barasa was nice, but adamant- no divorce.
Was it because he doesn't remember getting married? Mr.
Barasa totally remembers everything.
He built this for you- a house.
A shack! A whimsical cottage.
It's darling.
He built a house for me? Okay, let's be honest.
It's a shanty.
Here's what mr.
Barasa said - Verbatim means word for word.
- What? You sort of said it twice.
Hodgins.
I quote literally to the letter: Ever has it been that love does not know its own depth until the pain of separation? The guy writes poetry.
Please.
He was talking about you, Ms.
Montenegro, with tears in his eyes.
He should get a grip.
What would you like me to do next? What are you gonna do here, ang? This guy built you a house, he cried a little bit.
He smelled like a fresh wind after a summer storm, and you can practically see the lights of havana from the porch of that cottage.
I want a divorce.
If I'm gonna shack up with anybody, it's this guy.
We're gonna discuss this between ourselves, miss kippler.
I'll let you know how we want to proceed.
Okay.
Did I mention he's the most beautiful man I've ever seen? Don't blame me.
P.
I.
Code: Keep it real.
that girl lola gets off on inflicting pain.
Were you gonna hit her, too? No, not with a closed fist.
- Why? - Why? That leaves a mark.
- Agent booth.
- Yeah? Spoke with the shaws.
Asked if their daughter had any specific phobias.
Yeah? - Snakes.
- Snakes.
One crawled up out of the drain of her bathtub when she was a child.
- So since then - okay, that's good.
Just call all the pet shops, the reptile specialists- I don't know, the world of snakes- and see who's been buying 'em all up.
Does lola strike you as a snake person? Look, I'll deal with lola.
You go back to the lab.
Why? I won't hit her unless you say so.
Look, I'll do my street thing, you do your lab thing, all right? Together, we catch bad guys.
That's good math.
The lacquer holds tarantula hairs, your mystery spores and particulates which suggest heavy traffic.
I'm aware of the parameters.
I told you all that stuff.
I'm thinking aloud.
It's a technique.
Are you concentrating on the spores? Yes, I'm looking at them now.
He's aware of the parameters.
And the unexplained source of the steel dust? What I'd like is to look up from this microscope in about, mm, ten seconds and find myself totally alone and able to concentrate.
Oh, not nearly far enough.
Not even close.
Is that your costume? Uh, yeah.
It's sexually alluring.
Thank you.
I'm catwoman.
The superhero.
One of the most powerful female superhero figures.
I don't think so.
Are you kidding catwoman? Can you fly? I have nine lives.
Super strength, super speed, force people to tell the truth? I think I'm pretty fast.
Pretty fast is not super speed.
Hawaii.
Hawaii? The spore is atronecium from the haleahi nebulae.
It's a hawaiian orchid hybrid.
The victims were mummified in hawaii? How else would hawaiian pollen get absorbed into the wet lacquer? lola.
Remember me? Not one word passes through these lips without a lawyer's okay.
Right, and if you can't afford one- which is my guess- one will be provided.
Probably a crappy one who studied law on the internet.
What do you want? You attacked both of those two dead girls.
Did gregg tell you that? Yeah, and this one, too.
I didn't kill anyone.
That's right.
It was gregg who forced you to do that.
You know what, and if you don't tell me what I need to know in two seconds, I'm gonna start removing your piercings and I'm not gonna start with the ones on your face.
Look, I roughed 'em up, all right? that's it! I was gone.
I was out of there, man! Why do you think i'm never charged? - Yeah, okay.
- I'm gone, man! just remember, maryland and virginia both have the death penalties.
Keep that in mind before we find megan's body.
Let's go.
These are really tight, man! Don't you have to put on your costume? I already did.
I got a profile of the killer from sweets.
You mean dr.
Sweets.
Well, it's only theory, bones.
I mean, it's what he's best at.
I mean, he's only 12.
Sweets says the killer is definitely a male.
Gregg is a male.
No, gregg and lola work their sick little thing together.
Sweets says that the killer works alone and has a respectable blue-collar job.
In his public life, he's into saving people, he's unmarried.
Oh, he has a police or military background.
You do realize that sweets is describing you, right? How do I look? Good.
Wonder-ful.
- Get it? - Yeah.
- 'Cause you're wonder woman.
- I know.
What are you supposed to be? Oh, I'm a nerd squint.
You e, what is the rationale behind that conclusion? That's not what they look or sound like.
You mean we.
That's not what we look or sound like.
Okay.
You see what i did right there? I corrected you, you know, in character as a squint.
Angela and hodgins have a few things to show us before we go to the party.
What? What? This marks the location of shoreline amusement park.
These are the locations of three pet shops the fbi says sold out of snakes in the last week.
How many snakes in total? Over a hundred.
Let me guess.
- They all paid cash - yep.
And the last place sold out about an hour ago.
An hour ago? Booth, megan shaw is still alive.
Wait a second.
Both gregg liscombe and lola are in custody.
Sweets was right.
They didn't do it.
Hodgins! Hodgins has been isolating locations where the dead girls could have been exposed to the metal particulates he found in the lacquer.
Okay, how many? Megan shaw's still alive.
What do you want me to do? He wants us to guess.
Well, my guess is hawaii.
Not hawaii.
Well guess again, but better.
No, sorry.
Booth, they don't guess.
Who's they? - Them.
- Them.
Well, that's just stupid.
We do not guess.
You know what? You're a horse's ass.
Cow.
I'm a cow.
See my udder.
I need zack and hodgins.
The rest of you can go to the party.
How can we go to a party when a 14-year-old girl's being tortured to death by snakes? People like us can't work at full capacity with people like you constantly interrupting with irrelevancies.
It's true.
I love you, but it's true.
Okay, we're out of here.
This is E.
Let's go, cher.
Okay, we i'll just sit right over here in this chair and I'llt.
Booth, no! Fine.
I'll wait outside, okay? With this chair.
I'll be outside with this chair.
I'm worried that naomi from paleontology will feel strange being only the front half of a cow.
She got the good end of that deal.
Who's stronger, catwoman or wonder woman? - Wonder woman.
- Wonder woman.
I concur vehemently.
All right, now, ignoring the hawaiian pollen, these 126 sites represent loci where the necessary concentrations of particulates can be found: Underground garages, tunnels, etc.
Dr.
Sweets says we can assume that the murderer works for a living.
You want us to go on psychology? Let's assume the killer has to get back and forth from his in comic books, it's always called a lair.
From his lair in time for his job, sometimes during high-traffic hours.
Can you remove the sites which make that improbable? Assuming he needs to sleep.
Say, six hours a night.
Leaving six hours for travel and torture.
At a maximum of two hours travel time.
So, what, remove everything more than a hundred miles away? Too simplistic.
If it's on a highway, it could be up to 120 miles away.
Secondary roads, taking traffic patterns into account, less than fifty depending on the time of day and weather conditions.
It'll go faster if you do the calculations in your head, zack, and don't explain it to us.
Thank you.
How many does that leave? No.
No way the police can hit all those.
Not spread thin on halloween.
We can narrow it down further.
Factor: Mummification.
Yes, particulates plus mummification requires a steady, continuous supply of dry air.
A large oven with blowers.
I'd like to assume that the automotive particulates arrived with the blowing air.
Heated underground parking lots.
How is that not guessing? Einstein referred to such assumptions as acceptable intuitive leaps.
I acknowledge einstein as a scientific authority.
But he failed us this time.
The answer is in the anomalies.
The hawaiian spore.
And steel dust.
What makes it? Grinding, drilling, abrading.
Raping, milling.
Train wheels.
Okay, intuitive leap.
When a train turns, it grinds the rails, creates steel dust.
Subways which also provide warm, dry air.
They're vented.
What we need now are florists who carry hodgins' hawaiian flower which are situated directly over subway tracks.
Hey, where you going? To get booth.
Call me when you find the florist.
You're sure about this? Not at all.
Because you guessed.
But we do not guess.
I think you did.
I dare you to put that lasso of truth around you.
Now you're being completely irrational.
This lasso doesn't actually work.
These bracelets aren't actually made of amazonium.
They're stainless steel.
They can't stop a bullet.
okay.
Brennan.
Aloha floral supply between Friendship Heights and Bethesda The store sits right over the red line! thank you Dispatch 227 and 5 at Aloha flowers between Friendship Heights and Bethesda please be advised that agents are you see dressed as a squint and Wonder Woman repeat 227 and 5 Picture a scientist, nerd, brainiac, dweeb, dork, whatever.
- and a wonder woman - and a wonder woman Acknowledged 227 and 5.
Ahh, it's closed go round the back dry air subway, florists stay back okay, where did you even find a place to carry that? look could I plesae shoot this one? booth! Cedar oil, laquer.
This is where the killer mummified the bodies.
Phetemine, other other drugs.
I know who the murderer is.
Who? Let's get out of here.
Eats up the girls, leaves them bleeding.
Who shows up to help? Access to drugs.
The emt.
Smart.
You should wear a lab coat at all times.
Puts them in the back of his ambulance, he knocks them unconscious.
just stay there.
screams are coming from inside.
- Can I shoot it? - No! - Geez! You shot me! - Sorry! Sorry, booth! - Damn it! I said no! Don't shoot! No! - Are you all right? I think the bullet bounced off my bracelet.
Just like amazonium.
Geez, bones.
what are you doing? They're not poisonous.
I know.
I know.
Then why don't you come down? It seems I'm not completely in control of my actions.
Just get on my back.
God.
Bones.
megan? It's okay.
can you understand me? My head.
Just stop shooting at things, bones.
- He had a gun.
- You stay here.
Anyone comes through that door, you shoot their heads off.
Except me.
My gun is too big for me.
I could've told you that a hundred times.
Here, take mine.
Guard megan.
Come on, megan.
Come here.
it's okay.
Damn it.
How could a guy with military training miss with a scattergun? What were you, navy? Infantry.
Which is how I know you're carrying the 50-caliber 500.
Well, that's five shots.
And by my count you only got one shot left.
That's one dumbass gun to bring to a shootout! Where's your backup, booth? Shouldn't they be here by now? You need to be quiet.
Can you do that, megan? bones, you all right? We're okay.
We're okay.
He's using you to get to us.
Not for long, booth.
I'm just gonna stick my scattergun in there and empty the barrels.
Your girl is gonna look like hamburger.
One shot.
one hell of a shot now can you see why I hate clowns? Ms.
Kippler.
Ms.
Montenegro, you look amazing.
Halloween, right? Look, hodgins and i haven't really decided what we're gonna do next.
I tried to seduce him, you know.
Hodgins? No.
Your husband.
I took off my top and everything.
Why? I've been told i have alabaster skin that's really impossible to resist touching.
Isn't that some kind of conflict of interest? The pi code? It totally for you, the client.
I was testing Your husband with my wiles so that I could properly advise you.
You are a very dedicated investigator.
Which is why I have to tell you something i didn't want to say in front of dr.
Hodgkins.
Hodgins.
There's no K.
Your husband is deeply, deeply in love with you.
Also, he has incredible abs and forearMs.
So what I'm suggesting is that I take you down there, mediate a meeting, and see if any old sparks don't flare back into life.
I'm in love with hodgins.
Now.
Forever, Ms.
Kippler.
Did I mention the little catch in his throat when he said your name? Look, all I want out of him is a divorce, okay? So if you want to see him again and you want to rub your alabaster all over him and shake his snow globe, be my guest.
All I want is the divorce.
I hear you.
I believe you.
I just wanted to make sure.
And please don't ever say ew about hodgin beards.
I don'T like beards.
Especially in conjunction with huge, blue eyes.
Makes me feel like i'm staring into one of those russian religious icons.
Dr.
Hodgkins.
Hodgins.
Were you just talking to angela? Yes.
I was telling her that her husband is extremely physically attractive.
Okay.
Enough with that now.
Quit trying to drive a wedge.
It's a fact.
On a scale of one to ten, he's ten to the tenth power.
What am I? You're a solid 7.
5 Which is quite respectable.
Your job is to help me and angela to be together.
Dr.
Hodgkins, domestic issues make up the core of our business.
And I have to tell you, most of the time they go back.
They go back? They g husbands or their wives most of the time.
It's a fact.
And you think angela should go back to her husband? I don't have an opinion about should or should not.
I'm more interested in will or won'T.
But in this case, in my opinion I don't think she's going back to her husband.
Even after you practically threw him at her? Exactly.
Aren't you glad I did? Now you can sleep like a baby because of my thorough approach.
Thank you.
That's right, thank you.
Where is everybody? At the party, I guess.
We could still go.
Ah, we look like hell.
It's a halloween party.
We could be wonder woman and, um what's superman's secret identity? Clark kent.
Yes.
We could be wonder woman and clark kent after a really, really bad date.
Yeah, bad date because you shot me.
It was only a flesh wound.
And you dropped me on my head.
After you shot me.
Okay, I think i got you on this one.
Okay, wonder woman? I'm sorry you had to kill someone.
I know you hate that.
Yeah, he had it coming.
You hate it.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
We saved the girl.
That's a pretty good date.
- Except not really a date.
- I know.
It was work.
Not a date.
Really, really hard one.
And we're not really wonder woman and clark kent.
We're brennan and booth.
Look, you're the one who brought up the date analogy.
- you hungry? - yeah Me, too.
Okay, let's go grab a bite to eat.
what the hell are you doing? Nothing.
Bones Season 03 Episode 05
Avoid the creepies and the crawlies that live in every dark corner of the maze.
And the first one to reach the center and emerge alive will win the grand prize.
Oh, here we go.
Where am I? somebody help me! Right this way, miss.
Now that is an excellent costume.
What are you wearing? What? Now? No, not now.
To the jeffersonian halloween ball.
What I always wear.
Are you going this year? I'm the official unofficial fbi liaison to the jeffersonian.
Of course I'm going.
We just passed the wolman.
Go straight towards the guillotine and veer left.
It's a maze.
What can I do? Dr.
Potoska, how were the remains discovered? A kid passed out.
What killed him? The kid didn't die.
He just fainted.
Then why am I here? Well, when matty fainted, I was here with my own kids.
I'm a pediatrician, but I'm also the coroner.
Small town.
Yeah, well, matty revived easily enough.
Uh, he's what you call a nervous type kid.
But then I saw what it was that made him faint in the first place and I almost fainted, too, because it was a mummy, which I told the sheriff, who called the fbi, who called the jeffersonian.
And now here we are, lost in this stupid maze looking for the mummy.
A mummy? Yeah, I do not see a guillotine.
What do you call that? a cowboy? No, it's a scarecrow.
Look, just keep turning to the right, all right? Let me know when you reach the dragon.
Uh, dead end with teeth.
That's because you turned left at the goblin.
You were supposed to turn right.
Look, when you say a mummy, you mean, uh Wrapped in bandages, curse of king tut.
You know, a mummy.
No offense, but I'm not certain a pediatrician is qualified pediatrician and coroner.
See that?Yeah okay, we are at the electric chair.
There's an electric chair? Look, just tell the guy to throw his flashlight up in the air, will ya? Uh, the fbi requests that you toss your flashlight into the air.
Ten-four.
There it is.
Oh, let's see if we can get there this way.
Guys.
After you.
What do you think, bones? ocular contents dry, reubits collapsed leathery skin these are actual human remains.
A mummy.
How long will it take to get out of this maze? Not as long as you might think.
Takes a steady flow of dry air over a long period of time to achieve this kind of desiccated mummification.
The incan ice woman of peru.
The tarim basin mummies of china.
The peat bog tollund man in denmark.
How old are we talking? Buttons zipper, rivets she's probably wearing jeans.
So, freakozoid murder-mummification rather than fascinating history? She? Shape of the innominate bone indicates female.
Now listen, boys.
The jeffersonian halloween party- it's compulsory.
Donors, patrons, angels, benefactors.
So we all show up in costume and do our duty.
I don't want any argument o i will be the back end of a cow.
So no costume.
Naomi from paleontology has agreed to be my front.
Ah, so many jokes, so little time.
It's fine.
We're all in.
I'll be edward john smith for halloween.
Ill-fated captain of the titanic.
What about angela and dr.
Brennan? Dr.
Brennan always wears the same costume to these things.
She loves it.
Help me remove these.
Ooh, what's with the smell? Cedar oil? Also used in mummification.
What about this clear coating over the skin? Lacquer.
She was painted to death? The clothing came from a church-run thrift store.
How could you possibly know that? There is no bug or slime specific to church thrift stores.
You don't know that.
I'm the bug and slime guy.
You're just the auxiliary bone guy who dresses up like the back end of a cow.
Hodgins? Free church of america thrift store, huh? Tell booth.
I knew it wasn't bugs or slime.
No you didn't, and that's what makes me king of the lab! A loyal servant of the empress.
Clothes from this ministry were found on a dead body? Well, I'm afraid that happens fairly often.
Why? Because we're a charitable congregation.
Homeless people know that we'll provide them with what they need.
Do you, by any chance, remember these specific pieces of clothing? This is from your murder victim? Pastor jonas? Do you have anything like this in red? You're looking for something that screams satan, right? Basically.
I think we have a pink cape in the back.
Maybe we can dye it.
What kind of church dresses kids like satanists? Let me show you.
At halloween we do a hell house.
Fornication, theft, murder, gambling, usury, sodomy, abortion.
It's kind of horrific, isn't it? Well, abandoning the path of righteousness is horrific, dr.
Brennan.
This is our way of remaking a pagan holiday- halloween, into a positive celebration of christian values.
Excellent prostitute, stephanie.
Anyone ever dress like a mummy? We've never featured a false idol room, though, now that you mention it, it's not a bad idea.
Ancient egyptian religious beliefs endured for almost 4,000 years.
Twice the length of christianity.
Look, any of your kids suddenly disappear? No.
What if the children that you save from abortion grow up to be users and sodomites? I don't respond to mocking semantics, dr.
Brennan.
Nor do I, but she's serious.
In that case, my serious answer would be that in being given a chance to live a life, the aborted soul will have a multitude of opportunities to repent for their sins and live bathed in the holy spirit.
- Thank you.
- Thank you? You're welcome.
My name is amber kippler.
I'm a senior investigator with doyley private investigations.
Mr.
Doyley assured me he'd be taking a personal interest in the search for Ms.
Montenegro's husband.
Interest, yes.
But I'll be doing the actual footwork.
Mr.
Doyley is taking a very personal interest.
Only not from up close.
Do you have a lot of experience at this kind of work? Angela montenegro is not your birth name.
You changed your name on your 18th birthday becaus came to you in a dream.
you never told me that.
I never told anybody that.
If I can discover something nobody knew about a client, I'm not being paid to investigate, imagine what I can do for real.
Good point.
I never told anybody about that.
Yes, you did, actually.
A girl named roxie whose heart you broke in second year art school.
Oh, roxie.
What do you know about me? Wouldn't it be better if we got to Ms.
Montenegro's husband, grayson birimbau barasa? You found something? I found the actual human man.
In florida.
In the keys.
No name key.
Very remote.
Did you talk to him? - Absolutely not.
- Why? My instructions were to locate.
That being achieved, we can now discuss contact.
We want you to contact him.
Him to sign the divorce papers.
By get him do you mean - Force him to sign them? - If necessary.
Do you have a gun? Or just remind him of who I am and ask him politely.
What are you? Canadian? We'll do this one step at a time.
- Didn't that pastor guy make you mad? - No.
He's a fundamentalist.
I appreciate consistency.
Oh, the consistency of trying to scare kids into christianity? How do we keep kids from smoking? We tell them it gives them cancer.
It does give them cancer.
According to science.
You know, that's all you care about is science.
In the end, even someone who believes in empiricism and science has to take a leap of faith.
What? I believe in what i can hear, taste, see, touch and measure.
You believe in what you feel.
Pastor jonas believes that god speaks to him through a sacred book.
I feel like we're on the wrong side of the argument here.
It's cam.
What's up? I really need you to come back.
What's going on? I got a couple here, says they think the mummy in the maze is their daughter.
Oh, that'd save us some time on identification.
Their daughter only disappeared last week.
The remains we found were at least a year old.
Look, I'm great with corpses, but when it comes to loved ones let's just say there's a reason why I'm not a pediatrician.
So if you got a siren, turn it on.
Right.
Megan is 14.
She didn't run away.
Something terrible happened.
She's a very pretty girl.
What makes you think the remains we found are your daughter? The news said that you found the body of a teenage girl in a fun house.
I suddenly knew it was megan.
Suddenly knew? Mr.
And mrs.
Shaw, it wasn't a fun house.
It was a maze.
And the remains we found are more than a year old.
- You're certain? - Yes.
I see.
I'm sorruse me.
I don't understand why you're disappointed.
Your daughter might still be alive.
Megan is not still alive.
How are you so certain? I just am, I can't explain it.
I'm her mother.
I'm sorry.
Does this face mean anything to you? No.
Does she have something to do with megan? This is the girl that we found in the maze.
definitely not megan.
Yes? Dr Brennan another mummy's been found at Shoreline Amusement park.
perhaps the fact that Megan Shaw disappeared from here and theres another mummy here is a coincidence fact Bones there are no coincidences in a murder investigation You do know the strict definition of a fact right, it's not the same as a funny feeling Just because sombody says they saw a mummy doesn't mean they actually did I know what I saw.
Keep the mask on please ma'am.
What's wrong with her? Anxiety attack bought on by this dungeon here! I spend half my time with these calls.
You know it's not real right? I mean, you're over reacting to an excessive amount of stimuli! Keep the mask in place ma'am! Perhaps you should lose some weight! - Er ma'am.
- Bones, compassion.
I'm not over reacting, there's a dead body in there A thousand of them to be exact! There's a real one, I'm a nurse, I know a dead body when I see one! Did you see anything? Not much time for that.
Just went in, got her, got her out! Great! What did you see? A corpse passed the killer clown! Clown? - You okay? - Yeah - You sure? - Sure Come on Just clown.
What's wrong? the phone rang.
It's cam on the phone.
It's ringing.
Coulrophobia.
The fear of clowns.
Coulrophobia.
It may explain why you shot that clown last year.
Look, I have no problems with clowns.
I can stand right here.
See? And the phone.
Booth.
We got an id on our maze victim off of angela's sketch.
Great.
Uh, details to follow? I think you want to hear this now.
Name's stella higgins,15 years old.
Disappeared a year ago today.
What's she saying? Id and date of disappearance of our maze victim.
Booth, stella was last seen at shoreline amusement park.
What wow? More coincidences.
thanks.
The maze victim disappeared from here.
So we just go right past the clown.
I can walk right past the clown, like she said.
Just right torture dungeon.
Yeah.
Okay.
Clowns, scary.
Not you.
Oh, gee.
You're kidding me, right? oh, look at the eye, huh? It's a ping-pong ball.
Not this one.
How do you know? Human remains, booth.
It's sort of my specialty.
this is a dead person.
The first thing booth needs to know is if this is megan shaw.
It is not megan shaw.
I agree.
It would be impossible to mummify a body like this in just a little more than a week.
Dental records do not match.
Lacquer and cedar oil.
Looks like the same murderer.
That's leaping to a conclusion.
I said looks like, zack.
Looks like is not leaping.
Her phalanges- fingers- are damaged.
Metacarpals are cracked.
You've seen something like this before? In iraq, there were some remains they had been buried alive.
This person was buried alive? I'm not comfortable it looks like this person was buried alive.
Correct? Thtattoo on the second victim's shoulder matches that of judith suzanne evans How long ago? - Two years, almost to the day.
- From? Shoreline amusement park.
She was there with her big sister and a couple of her friends.
Skin and hair removed from beneath stella's fingernails turns out to be her own.
Also, the lacquer used on both victims is completely generic.
It's widely available.
She pulled out her own hair? What makes somebody do that? There are small puncture marks, hundreds of them, all over her body.
Like insect bites, but larger.
In both cases, the lacquer was infused with a number of particulates including a spore i'm trying to identify.
Are you ready to admit that it looks like both these girls were killed and mummified by the same person? I'm not prepared to Jump to that conclusion.
Come on.
You expect me to know when one body appeared in a pile of bodies? That's not reasonable.
An actual, genuine corpse appears, and you don't notice? The place is called dungeon of a 1,000 corpses.
Which is exactly why an entire fbi forensics team is sweeping this facility.
Facility? This hole counts as a facility? I know you.
- No.
- Yeah.
You were at the maze the other night.
Same costume.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You're just recalling that, huh? - What's your name? - Gregg.
Little hint.
Fbi asks for your name, you give the whole name.
His name's gregg liscombe.
He's worked here three years.
You're not supposed to wear the costume to other gigs, dude.
Dilutes the effect.
All the other bodies are fakes, agent booth.
Okay.
We'll just keep the entire fun house as a crime scene.
Yes, sir.
In that case, can I send my people home? Oh, no.
All your people have got to talk to my people.
And you're coming with me.
Why? Two places with dead bodies, and you're standing in the doorway dressed as the grim reaper.
It's my job, man.
It's not like I adopt the persona.
Don't say anything without a lawyer, gregg.
Tell you what else, gregg's got the keys to the place.
Shut up, dan! He's got keys, too.
And so does cleaning crew.
And park security.
How about you? You got keys? I've got nothing else to say without a lawyer present! okay, that's great, pincushion, 'cause you were practically invisible until now.
Now you're bucking as number one suspect.
Judith evans, age 16, our victim from the dungeon of 1,000 corpses.
I've identified stress fractures to both tibias, as well as tears to the medial collateral and anterior cruciate ligaments in both knees.
Catcher's knee.
There's nothing in the bio about judith evans being a baseball player.
Compressions to vertebrae c1 through c7 indicate that her neck was bent like this.
But forced.
I am not liking the picture that's forming inside my head.
Phalanges cracked, and her fingernails shredded, her head forced that way, her knees jammed up against her chest.
Do we think judith evans was buried alive? I, uh, I have another bad image of how stella higgins died.
- Spiders.
- Spiders? Tarantulas, to be specific.
Poisonous spiders? That's a common misconception, though the lack of poison doesn't make the bite any less painful.
This is an urticating hair from the theraphosinae family.
It appears to be barbed.
Yeah.
It's very irritating.
Hey, little-known fact: Tarantula hair was the main ingredient in itching powder for decades.
Is there any correlation between these hairs and the fact that stella higgins scratched herself so badly, and pulled out her own hair? She's bitten all over.
There had to be dozens of tarantulas on her so, yeah, there's a correlation.
I was operating under the assumption that the mysterious spore was transported by the tarantula, but I was wrong.
How do you know? Because there's no tarantula hairs on judith evans, but plenty of the spores and particulates.
She has carcinogenic dibenzopyrene isomers, asbestos, po manganese and barium.
And steel dust.
Which adds up to Internal combustion engines.
Traffic.
Except for the steel dust.
I have no clue about the steel dust.
Well, stella's tox results show chloroform, ephedrine, theophylline, clonydine and methamphetamine.
Judith's remains show trace evidences of the same compounds, but in different concentrations.
Ephedrine is synthetic adrenaline.
Most of those are heavy stimulants.
Their metabolisms would race.
Heart rates would accelerate dangerously.
Spiders.
Live burial.
Drug-induced panic is our murderer literally scaring girls to death? I always felt, somehow, that judy was still alive, even after two years.
It's crazy, huh? Probably guilt, right? For letting my little sister out of my sight? Look, you can't blame yourself.
Did my sister suffer? You know, we got the best people in the world figuring out exactly what happened that night.
So you and your sister went to the amusement park together? Its kind of the thing to do on halloween.
My mom made me take her.
I didn't want to.
I mean, I loved judy but she was your kid sister- pain in the ass.
She made me take judy, even though I didn't want to, and mom never got over that.
How did you and judy get separated? Judy got scared.
She didn't want to go in the fun house.
Why? There was this huge monster above the door.
Judy freaked.
She said go ahead, she'd wait outside.
Judy was claustrophobic.
How bad? Pretty bad.
She wigged out when we were driving down.
There were six of us jammed in a car.
We had to stop and let her out a couple times.
Do you remember if there was a grim reaper that night at the entrance? Yeah, there was.
Could that be him? Yeah.
When we came out looking for judy, he told us she had taken off with some guy.
The police could never confirm that.
Registered sex offender.
He was present at two places where the remains of young girls were found.
Coincidence.
Statistically improbable.
Scientifically improbable but, in the real world, impossible.
Do you recognize these two girls? Man, every girl that comes in there talks to me.
I don't remember them.
Why does every girl talk to you? 'Cause I'm cute, scary.
Yeah, you do pretty well with the teenage girls, don't you, gregory? You get them all tingly? All right, that sex offender thing? It's a joke, man.
Look it up.
I got drunk, and I took a leak in a public fountain.
Yeah.
We did look it up.
There was a group of schoolgirls on the other side of that fountain.
Four times, you've been caught with your pants down, all around teenage girls.
Coincidence? Two years ago, you told this girl's sister that she took off with some guy.
Do you remember her? Yeah, sure.
It's the girl that disappeared.
The thing about you guys- you're all the same.
You sniff each other out.
Who was the guy? Judith evans disappeared october 24, two years ago.
Stella higgins, one year ago, a week before halloween.
So? So, megan shaw vanished from the same place.
You can see the common element here, can't you, gregg? - You.
- Coincidence.
There are no coincidences in a murder investigation.
Well, it's got nothing to do with me.
Geez, you can'T did you see that? Hey! Megan shaw was 14 years old.
Understand me? Who was the guy? - Good shot, bones.
- Thanks.
There was no guy! - It was lola.
- Lola? - The girl with the piercings? - Yeah.
What the hell were you doing with her? It's not what you think.
The girls come with me, maybe we get it on a little lola likes that.
Your girlfriend likes to see you with little girls? She likes to interrupt.
You know, maybe smack them around a little.
- Smack around? - Yeah.
It gets lola hot.
For us.
For later.
Sometimes, maybe she goes a little too far.
How did you get to and from a remote, nameless florida key so fast? It does have a name.
Its name is no name key.
Your confusion is natural.
Uh, did you talk to my husband? Mr.
Barasa was very pleasant.
Very pleasant.
I mean, wow! He smelled exactly like a fresh wind just after a summer storm.
You smelled him? Part of the private investigator credo, dr.
Hodgins: Insure that the client- that's you- and him.
I'm paying.
The credo says make sure the client is committed to their objective at each step.
Ergo, fresh wind after summer storm reminder.
Despite the storm, I want a divorce.
In that case, the news is disappointing.
Mr.
Barasa was nice, but adamant- no divorce.
Was it because he doesn't remember getting married? Mr.
Barasa totally remembers everything.
He built this for you- a house.
A shack! A whimsical cottage.
It's darling.
He built a house for me? Okay, let's be honest.
It's a shanty.
Here's what mr.
Barasa said - Verbatim means word for word.
- What? You sort of said it twice.
Hodgins.
I quote literally to the letter: Ever has it been that love does not know its own depth until the pain of separation? The guy writes poetry.
Please.
He was talking about you, Ms.
Montenegro, with tears in his eyes.
He should get a grip.
What would you like me to do next? What are you gonna do here, ang? This guy built you a house, he cried a little bit.
He smelled like a fresh wind after a summer storm, and you can practically see the lights of havana from the porch of that cottage.
I want a divorce.
If I'm gonna shack up with anybody, it's this guy.
We're gonna discuss this between ourselves, miss kippler.
I'll let you know how we want to proceed.
Okay.
Did I mention he's the most beautiful man I've ever seen? Don't blame me.
P.
I.
Code: Keep it real.
that girl lola gets off on inflicting pain.
Were you gonna hit her, too? No, not with a closed fist.
- Why? - Why? That leaves a mark.
- Agent booth.
- Yeah? Spoke with the shaws.
Asked if their daughter had any specific phobias.
Yeah? - Snakes.
- Snakes.
One crawled up out of the drain of her bathtub when she was a child.
- So since then - okay, that's good.
Just call all the pet shops, the reptile specialists- I don't know, the world of snakes- and see who's been buying 'em all up.
Does lola strike you as a snake person? Look, I'll deal with lola.
You go back to the lab.
Why? I won't hit her unless you say so.
Look, I'll do my street thing, you do your lab thing, all right? Together, we catch bad guys.
That's good math.
The lacquer holds tarantula hairs, your mystery spores and particulates which suggest heavy traffic.
I'm aware of the parameters.
I told you all that stuff.
I'm thinking aloud.
It's a technique.
Are you concentrating on the spores? Yes, I'm looking at them now.
He's aware of the parameters.
And the unexplained source of the steel dust? What I'd like is to look up from this microscope in about, mm, ten seconds and find myself totally alone and able to concentrate.
Oh, not nearly far enough.
Not even close.
Is that your costume? Uh, yeah.
It's sexually alluring.
Thank you.
I'm catwoman.
The superhero.
One of the most powerful female superhero figures.
I don't think so.
Are you kidding catwoman? Can you fly? I have nine lives.
Super strength, super speed, force people to tell the truth? I think I'm pretty fast.
Pretty fast is not super speed.
Hawaii.
Hawaii? The spore is atronecium from the haleahi nebulae.
It's a hawaiian orchid hybrid.
The victims were mummified in hawaii? How else would hawaiian pollen get absorbed into the wet lacquer? lola.
Remember me? Not one word passes through these lips without a lawyer's okay.
Right, and if you can't afford one- which is my guess- one will be provided.
Probably a crappy one who studied law on the internet.
What do you want? You attacked both of those two dead girls.
Did gregg tell you that? Yeah, and this one, too.
I didn't kill anyone.
That's right.
It was gregg who forced you to do that.
You know what, and if you don't tell me what I need to know in two seconds, I'm gonna start removing your piercings and I'm not gonna start with the ones on your face.
Look, I roughed 'em up, all right? that's it! I was gone.
I was out of there, man! Why do you think i'm never charged? - Yeah, okay.
- I'm gone, man! just remember, maryland and virginia both have the death penalties.
Keep that in mind before we find megan's body.
Let's go.
These are really tight, man! Don't you have to put on your costume? I already did.
I got a profile of the killer from sweets.
You mean dr.
Sweets.
Well, it's only theory, bones.
I mean, it's what he's best at.
I mean, he's only 12.
Sweets says the killer is definitely a male.
Gregg is a male.
No, gregg and lola work their sick little thing together.
Sweets says that the killer works alone and has a respectable blue-collar job.
In his public life, he's into saving people, he's unmarried.
Oh, he has a police or military background.
You do realize that sweets is describing you, right? How do I look? Good.
Wonder-ful.
- Get it? - Yeah.
- 'Cause you're wonder woman.
- I know.
What are you supposed to be? Oh, I'm a nerd squint.
You e, what is the rationale behind that conclusion? That's not what they look or sound like.
You mean we.
That's not what we look or sound like.
Okay.
You see what i did right there? I corrected you, you know, in character as a squint.
Angela and hodgins have a few things to show us before we go to the party.
What? What? This marks the location of shoreline amusement park.
These are the locations of three pet shops the fbi says sold out of snakes in the last week.
How many snakes in total? Over a hundred.
Let me guess.
- They all paid cash - yep.
And the last place sold out about an hour ago.
An hour ago? Booth, megan shaw is still alive.
Wait a second.
Both gregg liscombe and lola are in custody.
Sweets was right.
They didn't do it.
Hodgins! Hodgins has been isolating locations where the dead girls could have been exposed to the metal particulates he found in the lacquer.
Okay, how many? Megan shaw's still alive.
What do you want me to do? He wants us to guess.
Well, my guess is hawaii.
Not hawaii.
Well guess again, but better.
No, sorry.
Booth, they don't guess.
Who's they? - Them.
- Them.
Well, that's just stupid.
We do not guess.
You know what? You're a horse's ass.
Cow.
I'm a cow.
See my udder.
I need zack and hodgins.
The rest of you can go to the party.
How can we go to a party when a 14-year-old girl's being tortured to death by snakes? People like us can't work at full capacity with people like you constantly interrupting with irrelevancies.
It's true.
I love you, but it's true.
Okay, we're out of here.
This is E.
Let's go, cher.
Okay, we i'll just sit right over here in this chair and I'llt.
Booth, no! Fine.
I'll wait outside, okay? With this chair.
I'll be outside with this chair.
I'm worried that naomi from paleontology will feel strange being only the front half of a cow.
She got the good end of that deal.
Who's stronger, catwoman or wonder woman? - Wonder woman.
- Wonder woman.
I concur vehemently.
All right, now, ignoring the hawaiian pollen, these 126 sites represent loci where the necessary concentrations of particulates can be found: Underground garages, tunnels, etc.
Dr.
Sweets says we can assume that the murderer works for a living.
You want us to go on psychology? Let's assume the killer has to get back and forth from his in comic books, it's always called a lair.
From his lair in time for his job, sometimes during high-traffic hours.
Can you remove the sites which make that improbable? Assuming he needs to sleep.
Say, six hours a night.
Leaving six hours for travel and torture.
At a maximum of two hours travel time.
So, what, remove everything more than a hundred miles away? Too simplistic.
If it's on a highway, it could be up to 120 miles away.
Secondary roads, taking traffic patterns into account, less than fifty depending on the time of day and weather conditions.
It'll go faster if you do the calculations in your head, zack, and don't explain it to us.
Thank you.
How many does that leave? No.
No way the police can hit all those.
Not spread thin on halloween.
We can narrow it down further.
Factor: Mummification.
Yes, particulates plus mummification requires a steady, continuous supply of dry air.
A large oven with blowers.
I'd like to assume that the automotive particulates arrived with the blowing air.
Heated underground parking lots.
How is that not guessing? Einstein referred to such assumptions as acceptable intuitive leaps.
I acknowledge einstein as a scientific authority.
But he failed us this time.
The answer is in the anomalies.
The hawaiian spore.
And steel dust.
What makes it? Grinding, drilling, abrading.
Raping, milling.
Train wheels.
Okay, intuitive leap.
When a train turns, it grinds the rails, creates steel dust.
Subways which also provide warm, dry air.
They're vented.
What we need now are florists who carry hodgins' hawaiian flower which are situated directly over subway tracks.
Hey, where you going? To get booth.
Call me when you find the florist.
You're sure about this? Not at all.
Because you guessed.
But we do not guess.
I think you did.
I dare you to put that lasso of truth around you.
Now you're being completely irrational.
This lasso doesn't actually work.
These bracelets aren't actually made of amazonium.
They're stainless steel.
They can't stop a bullet.
okay.
Brennan.
Aloha floral supply between Friendship Heights and Bethesda The store sits right over the red line! thank you Dispatch 227 and 5 at Aloha flowers between Friendship Heights and Bethesda please be advised that agents are you see dressed as a squint and Wonder Woman repeat 227 and 5 Picture a scientist, nerd, brainiac, dweeb, dork, whatever.
- and a wonder woman - and a wonder woman Acknowledged 227 and 5.
Ahh, it's closed go round the back dry air subway, florists stay back okay, where did you even find a place to carry that? look could I plesae shoot this one? booth! Cedar oil, laquer.
This is where the killer mummified the bodies.
Phetemine, other other drugs.
I know who the murderer is.
Who? Let's get out of here.
Eats up the girls, leaves them bleeding.
Who shows up to help? Access to drugs.
The emt.
Smart.
You should wear a lab coat at all times.
Puts them in the back of his ambulance, he knocks them unconscious.
just stay there.
screams are coming from inside.
- Can I shoot it? - No! - Geez! You shot me! - Sorry! Sorry, booth! - Damn it! I said no! Don't shoot! No! - Are you all right? I think the bullet bounced off my bracelet.
Just like amazonium.
Geez, bones.
what are you doing? They're not poisonous.
I know.
I know.
Then why don't you come down? It seems I'm not completely in control of my actions.
Just get on my back.
God.
Bones.
megan? It's okay.
can you understand me? My head.
Just stop shooting at things, bones.
- He had a gun.
- You stay here.
Anyone comes through that door, you shoot their heads off.
Except me.
My gun is too big for me.
I could've told you that a hundred times.
Here, take mine.
Guard megan.
Come on, megan.
Come here.
it's okay.
Damn it.
How could a guy with military training miss with a scattergun? What were you, navy? Infantry.
Which is how I know you're carrying the 50-caliber 500.
Well, that's five shots.
And by my count you only got one shot left.
That's one dumbass gun to bring to a shootout! Where's your backup, booth? Shouldn't they be here by now? You need to be quiet.
Can you do that, megan? bones, you all right? We're okay.
We're okay.
He's using you to get to us.
Not for long, booth.
I'm just gonna stick my scattergun in there and empty the barrels.
Your girl is gonna look like hamburger.
One shot.
one hell of a shot now can you see why I hate clowns? Ms.
Kippler.
Ms.
Montenegro, you look amazing.
Halloween, right? Look, hodgins and i haven't really decided what we're gonna do next.
I tried to seduce him, you know.
Hodgins? No.
Your husband.
I took off my top and everything.
Why? I've been told i have alabaster skin that's really impossible to resist touching.
Isn't that some kind of conflict of interest? The pi code? It totally for you, the client.
I was testing Your husband with my wiles so that I could properly advise you.
You are a very dedicated investigator.
Which is why I have to tell you something i didn't want to say in front of dr.
Hodgkins.
Hodgins.
There's no K.
Your husband is deeply, deeply in love with you.
Also, he has incredible abs and forearMs.
So what I'm suggesting is that I take you down there, mediate a meeting, and see if any old sparks don't flare back into life.
I'm in love with hodgins.
Now.
Forever, Ms.
Kippler.
Did I mention the little catch in his throat when he said your name? Look, all I want out of him is a divorce, okay? So if you want to see him again and you want to rub your alabaster all over him and shake his snow globe, be my guest.
All I want is the divorce.
I hear you.
I believe you.
I just wanted to make sure.
And please don't ever say ew about hodgin beards.
I don'T like beards.
Especially in conjunction with huge, blue eyes.
Makes me feel like i'm staring into one of those russian religious icons.
Dr.
Hodgkins.
Hodgins.
Were you just talking to angela? Yes.
I was telling her that her husband is extremely physically attractive.
Okay.
Enough with that now.
Quit trying to drive a wedge.
It's a fact.
On a scale of one to ten, he's ten to the tenth power.
What am I? You're a solid 7.
5 Which is quite respectable.
Your job is to help me and angela to be together.
Dr.
Hodgkins, domestic issues make up the core of our business.
And I have to tell you, most of the time they go back.
They go back? They g husbands or their wives most of the time.
It's a fact.
And you think angela should go back to her husband? I don't have an opinion about should or should not.
I'm more interested in will or won'T.
But in this case, in my opinion I don't think she's going back to her husband.
Even after you practically threw him at her? Exactly.
Aren't you glad I did? Now you can sleep like a baby because of my thorough approach.
Thank you.
That's right, thank you.
Where is everybody? At the party, I guess.
We could still go.
Ah, we look like hell.
It's a halloween party.
We could be wonder woman and, um what's superman's secret identity? Clark kent.
Yes.
We could be wonder woman and clark kent after a really, really bad date.
Yeah, bad date because you shot me.
It was only a flesh wound.
And you dropped me on my head.
After you shot me.
Okay, I think i got you on this one.
Okay, wonder woman? I'm sorry you had to kill someone.
I know you hate that.
Yeah, he had it coming.
You hate it.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
We saved the girl.
That's a pretty good date.
- Except not really a date.
- I know.
It was work.
Not a date.
Really, really hard one.
And we're not really wonder woman and clark kent.
We're brennan and booth.
Look, you're the one who brought up the date analogy.
- you hungry? - yeah Me, too.
Okay, let's go grab a bite to eat.
what the hell are you doing? Nothing.
Bones Season 03 Episode 05