Courage the Cowardly Dog (1999) s03e05 Episode Script

Scuba-Scuba Doo-Conway the Contaminationist

We interrupt this program to bring you Courage the Cowardly Dog show! Starring Courage, the Cowardly Dog! Abandoned as a pup, he was found by Muriel, who lives in the middle of Nowhere with her husband Eustace Bagge.
But creepy stuff happens in Nowhere.
It's up to Courage to save his new home.
Stupid dog! You made me look bad! Look, Courage.
Isn't all this coral beautiful? Mmm-hmm.
Get out of my way! Treasure, where are you? Huh? Look at the sea anemone.
Look at the sea urchin! Look at the little people having tea.
Huh? Phew.
You're crazy.
There ain't no little people.
I saw them, Eustace.
What kind of little people? Little people like this dog? Idiot dog.
- Adorable wee little things they were.
- Bah! You can come with us tomorrow, Eustace, and see for yourself.
No way.
Ain't going back in the water.
Ain't even going in the bathtub.
Suit yourself.
I'm going to bed.
Eh, can't sleep.
Lousy stupid island in the middle of the stupid lousy water.
I think I'll call my ma.
Hello? Oh, it's you! I thought you were on holiday.
What are you bothering me for? Muriel's going crazy.
Tell me something I don't know.
Says she sees little people in the coral.
What? Say that again.
You heard me, Ma.
Muriel says she sees little people in the coral.
We've found the coral, the kind little people live in.
Excellent! That coral makes the best wigs! No muss, no fuss.
No brush.
Gold, silver, doubloons? Treasure, where are you? Oh! Ah.
Only a stupid pie tin.
Why don't you come with us to give the wee people this pie I made? Ain't no such thing as wee people.
Anyway, I'm looking for buried treasure.
Okay, suit yourself.
Come on, Courage.
Let's say hello to the wee people.
Oh, Courage, look.
Welcome to Coralville, large strangers.
We are the Coralites.
How lovely it is to meet you all! I made you a pie.
Pie! - Excuse me! - Eugh! Would you like a tour of great hall of coral history? We'd be honored.
Our proud history begins with our founder and forefather, Ezra Jedediah Coral.
With a single piece of coral, Ezra began building this reef.
He started a family.
And his family and the coral grew and grew into what you see today.
And we work hard to make sure our history continues.
We are the last of our kind.
Without this reef, we would all disappear.
This reef took thousands of years to build.
Maintaining it is endless work.
Can we help you? We'd be honored.
Well, happy birthday to me.
Gotta find me some treasure.
Gotta find me some treasure.
Well, happy birthday to me! We're under attack! What? Courage, we can't let this happen.
Get out of the You! Have you lost your minds? There are wee people living here! I won't let you destroy them and their beautiful coral! It'll look more beautiful on people's heads where it makes me rich.
Courage, go get Eustace.
Tell him his mother is here and she's gone mad.
Rooo.
Time to turn that dog into puppy chow for sharks! Torpedo away! Stay calm! Bet I can sell this thing to a collector and make a bundle! Eh? Ha-ha-ha.
Stinking lousy dog! Yes! Oh, Courage, where are ya? Ah! You! So, it's a dogfight you want, huh? Okay! Fire rear torpedo! What are you doing? Stupid dog! Watch where you're going, you fool! Courage, your name will go down in Coralville history alongside the great Ezra Jedediah Coral! Courage, to celebrate the wonderful thing you did to save the wee people, I made your favorite pie.
Excuse me.
Beautiful work, Courage.
Ah, my back's killing me.
I ain't got no pep, no moxie.
It's getting so I don't even have the energy to kick that stupid dog! I know how you're feeling, Eustace.
The work just keeps getting harder.
Oh, my! Is it snowing already? Yay! Hmm Huh? Help! Help me.
Oh, heavens! The poor man is hurt.
Big deal! Tell him to fix my windmill! Should we call a doctor? Perhaps a hot soak or a nice cup of tea? What can I get you, then? I didn't quite get that, dear.
I think he's saying "sludge.
" Courage, be a good dog and see if we have any sludge.
Ew! What's Huh? Oh, my! You finished the whole thing.
Yuck! Feeling better, Mister The name is Conway, my dear.
And, yes, thanks to you, I am on the road to recovery.
The sludge really worked? Always does.
But I'm still a little weak.
I think it's the air.
Something's in the air.
Oh, my! I should finish vacuuming.
No! No! No! No! My dear, you're using that machine all wrong.
Flip the switch in the other direction.
But I've always done it this way.
Well, you are the guest.
Ah! Out with the good air, in with the bad.
Out with the good air, in with the bad.
Now, this can't be good for you.
Would you believe I'm 193 years old? My dear, not only are there health benefits to living like this, but think of the money you save on cleaning bills.
Huh? Works for me.
Well, honestly, I'd love to feel young again.
Me, too.
Then I'm the guy to help you.
First of all, you must breathe deeply.
It doesn't feel so good.
Don't worry.
You'll get used to it.
Just do as I say.
I've got many ways to help you live longer and live better.
You know, it's not so bad once you get used to being woozy.
Woozy? Well, I know just the thing to fix you up.
A nice soothing bath.
Well, I do want a bit more pep in my step.
It's good for what's ailing you, my dear.
Excuse me.
Ooh! It burns a bit! That only means it's working! That stuff won't help you live long like Conway.
You are a dog.
You understand the benefits of filthy, disgusting filth.
Mmm-mmm.
Well, then get used to it.
With a little sprucing down, I think I can call this home.
Muriel? Muriel? Yes? I forgot.
That's okay, Eustace.
As long as we have our health.
We do have our health, don't we? Of course you have your health.
You have better health than ever.
Don't you feel fantastic? Oh, such a pretty cloud.
Okay! Seal it up! Oh, no! Silly dog.
You'd need a much bigger vacuum to clean this up! Hmm Yes! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Whee! Ooh! Oh, my, I haven't felt this good in days.
Speak for yourself.
I was saving me some money on cleaning equipment.
Help! Get me out! Well, you know, actually, it's kind of nice in here.
So polluted.
Well, I hope Conway can go somewhere where he can live the way he wants, like a pig.
Live long like Conway! Courage, you look a fright.
Let's go inside and get you cleaned up.
Hose him off out here! I don't want that stupid, filthy dog in my house! Stupid dog! English March 2017
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