Five Bedrooms (2019) s03e05 Episode Script
Four Memories
Previously on 5 Bedrooms
Sorry, I thought you were going back to the UK
If Harry's going to be starting a family here, I mean I'm not going to miss that
Sorry, I might just
I'm not the problem, am I?
You just hate me
I don't hate you Liz
What is it?
I've always had feelings for you
Did she tell you about the problems with Sam?
Did we push them too hard?
Because the truth is, I'll sign pretty much anything
I think they just need a bit of space
She give you any idea when she'll be able to look at me again?
Just dropping off dishes, stay where you are
Shit
It's good to see you
Don't do that
What if I move in?
I mean what if a full seven days exposure, week in, week out, is too much?
We have unanimous agreement and we'll proceed with Simo's suggestion
Any questions?
No
Since I can remember, I dreamed of being in a loving, committed relationship
Being able to call someone my person, feeling like they were home
and knowing it was reciprocated
Missed ya
It was everything I'd expected
Good day?
And a couple of things I didn't
Behind us, behind us, they're on us
Until he moved in, I'd never noticed Simo's obsession with online gaming
There's two of them underneath me, yeah, yeah, come on, come on
I've used my tactical
Boost!
That was close mate, that was close
Or that he liked to have a chat
Chuka, Sim, boy, it's all over for Birki and Lisa again, mate
He's, yeah, he's worried she's gonna get rid of the caravan
The same chat
The caravan's already off of like Gumtree, mate, feature that
Yeah, no, no, no, it's just the caravan, not the annex
Over and over again
It's all over for Birki and Lisa again, yeah, I know
Bloody Birki's messed things up with Lisa again
Renai's on hold
And she's selling the caravan
Yeah
It's not that I don't appreciate him being there for his friends
It just doesn't seem like the most effective way of communicating
Yeah, but it's the intimacy that he's striving for, eh?
Can you just chuck him under the tap for us?
It's a one-on-one
You know, once I tried to show him how to reply all to a group email
He teared up
Said it was too impersonal
Just one other thing
Have you ever worried that Sim might have gastrointestinal issues?
Reliability was always a trait in Simo I admired
I just hadn't realised it extended to every corner of his life
It was a consistent 4.50am every morning for a solid hour
He does always light a candle
And he's very dependable with his midpoint courtesy flush
Do you think it could be irritable bowel?
Or maybe he's allergic to fructose?
Hey, you just moved in together
There are always going to be a couple of wrinkles to iron out
How are you going with this system of pillows?
It had been 37 nights since Simo moved in
And 37 nights since I had a pillow to sleep on
Because Simo took them all
I'm sure your shoulder won't get sore, I can use a pillow
I could sleep like this forever
But I'd waited over half my life for this
I wasn't going to let a general lack of neck support get between me and happily ever after
Hey Ace
Yeah
Perky
I think he's a bit banged up
Might have to head out to Crang for a bit
Get on the tools, give me a hand with the extension
But if an opportunity for spinal comfort did happen to present
I'll miss you but I totally understand
I think you should go
You sure?
Of course
Oh
Have you heard?
Good morning
Gerry's back in Melbourne
No, I didn't know
Turns out she's got a pretty good excuse for the radio silence
She and Sam have broken up
Still trying to work out which way is up so starting a family is off the table for the foreseeable future
I realise this comes as a bit of a shock
You know, I mean not that it matters but who do you think broke up with who?
God that's awful
For everyone
Are you feeling okay?
I actually feel so relieved
I wasn't the reason Gerry was pulling away
I didn't know you were feeling or still feeling that
No, of course, of course it was
Well it doesn't matter
We've got our explanation and she wants to catch up this weekend
This weekend?
I might need to check my diary and come back to you
Oh no sorry, I actually meant she wants to catch up with me
Do you mind?
Oh no, God, go for it
Great, thanks
Just holistically speaking do you think that's the best approach?
Going in alone?
So you do mind?
No, I'm just saying that knowing Gerry historically
That there's a good chance that she's going to be at her worst
And you might want to be prepared for that
Okay, well I'll keep that in mind
Thank you
That's the fifth batch of online purchases you've ordered
This week
You want to tell me what's up?
There was a sale
Well when you're done trying to fill the void
You know where to find me
Hello
Hi, it's me
Liz
Liz
I'm aware it's you, Liz
Look, I know it's been a while
I just thought you might need some space
Hello?
You've spoken to Harry
I have
Are you okay?
Well I'm in my late 30s and living with my mother so
Gerry I'm so sorry
About the breakup
It wasn't anything to do with me was it?
No, it wasn't
Do you want to meet up?
With me?
Liz, I reached out to Harry because
He deserves an explanation
Um, just as a matter of interest
How much of an explanation are we talking?
Well I haven't said anything about us
Have you?
No, no not a word
I think it might be best for everyone if we just forget anything ever happened
Yeah, yeah, no it's probably the best thing for
You and for Harry and me
And your husband?
Stuart
Of course, my husband
Day one of solo living
And I wondered if being alone would suddenly feel empty
But then I took off my pants
Lined up a few rom-coms
Cracked into the ice cream
Straight out of the tub
And it felt so good
Probably too good
Hi Dad, is everything okay?
That slow moving apprentice bloke
Not Benny, the other one
Buf or Biff
Timo?
Ah, the tip of my tongue
What about him?
He's here
He's loitering between the front fence and the big gun tree
That's impossible
You haven't told him I did well with my super have you, or the Bitcoin?
Dad, Simo's in Kerang
Dad, still there?
Travelling, he's travelling
Confirmed he is on approach
I'll call you back Moose
There was no reason why Simo would go to Tasmania
And voluntarily visit my father
Except maybe one
Mr Elling
Des
Mr Elling
I've come here to ask respectfully for your blessing to propose to your daughter
Ainsley
And?
I love Ainsley
So much
And I want to spend the rest of my life with her
If she'll have me
What does Ainsley think about all this?
I'm not sure, I haven't asked her yet
I think you should be asking her, not me
You're currently married?
No sir
You have any children in utero or otherwise?
No, no sir, no sir
You're hesitating
Sorry sir, that's just my nerves sir
You're financially independent?
Yes sir, I run my own business and I firmly believe in the power of compound interest
Who do you bear it for?
Well?
I prefer not to say sir
Why's that?
I'm afraid you might not like the answer sir
All that's ever mattered to me is that Ainsley's happy
And if that involves you, then
Really?
You know, I was on the phone to Ainsley before you came bouncing in here like a tennis ball
I could have sworn you were going to ask for money
Well you didn't tell her I was here did you?
I'll walk her back
Yeah turned out it was an old mate after all
Okay, who was it?
Yeah good chat, I'm off
You need to use the facilities?
It's very considerate of you sir, but I didn't want to risk it, I went a few times before I came
The door locks automatically from the outside and I'll see you at the wedding
See you there, hopefully
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Hello?
Hez, it's Sim, I've got news
Look I know things have been seriously shit for you and Benny and I definitely don't want to add to any of that
But I was kind of hoping
Yeah he's on the other line isn't he?
Yeah it'll be a very quick merge phone call, no cameras, three minutes tops
Do I have a choice?
Yes, yes of course, this is merely a respectful request for your permission
Two minutes
Thank you, one sec
We all here?
Still here
Yeah g'day Hez
Goc's ticking Simmer
Hez, Benny, you know I love the both of ya, which is why I wanted you to be the first to know
Ainsley's dad's given me the nod to propose
Ha ha ha mate, that's awesome news, that's the best thing I've heard in ages
Congratulations fella
If you could just keep it on the down low until further notice, well you can tell the others but not Ains obviously
She still thinks I'm in Kerrang
What's in Kerrang?
Oh with Berkey, genius
Sim, Sim you there?
Yeah I was just taking a breath mate, to be honest I was a bit worried that this proposal might have been a bit triggering for you both
I appreciate the concern Simmer, but as long as I don't have to learn a choreographed dance I'm here to help
Yeah we both are mate, we both are
It's so good to hear that because if you're both up for it my instinct for the proposal is to go big
Shit Ains is calling, what should I do?
Leave it
Hang up, hang up
Leave it
Hello
Hello Kevin Fitzsimer speaking
Sim it's me
Oh Ains, hi, how are ya?
I'm missing you
How's Kerrang? Is the Renault coming along?
Hello?
Yeah it's a bit of bad news actually Ains, it's asbestos actually, Berkey's place is riddled with it
Asbestos, isn't that dangerous?
It is, extremely, and it's everywhere here, it's in the roof, the tiles, the insulation, it's all through the bloody plumbing
But don't worry Ains, we're taking extra good care with this removal
You're doing the removal, don't you need some kind of licence for that?
Ah yeah look Ains, I did raise that with Berkey but um, the thing is he's looking at this bloody asbestos removal as kind of metaphoric or something
He reckons if you can't resolve the toxicity in his home he's not going to be able to resolve it in his relationship
But the good news is Ains, I'll be home soon and I can't bloody wait to see him
Ains, you all good?
Actually I'm feeling Dad called earlier, he said he saw you
Oh, is your dad in Kerang is he? Yes
Ben?
Ains, hey how are ya? Sorry to butt in, I'm up here with Sim and Berkey and the asbestos
You're parked out the front here
Yeah I know, I caught a lift up with old buckets there, but anyway we're just tackling the final few bits of shooting now so I should probably
Please tell me you've done some kind of removal training, or buckets
Okay, well everyone just be safe
Yep, no worries Ains, we'll do it as best as we can
Mate
Fuck
Sorry mate, I just fucked it and then I committed to it and I think it's going to be alright, I reckon I can clear out of the house without her seeing me
What was that?
It's fine, I actually think big pitch out
Hey, are you home?
Close it, close it, quiet
Hey
Oh shit, turn it off
What's going on?
Please don't tell Ben
What?
I knew he was away, helping a mate with the Renault and I was snooping, I'm not proud of it
Oh, he's, do you want me to go back in there with you?
No, thank you
What are you worried about?
I don't know, just been thinking about it a bit more lately
Do you think maybe you're feeling a bit of deferred onset anger towards Ben, because I know I am
Yeah, yeah, just you know, a bit of apang
Do you think you still have feelings for him?
No, no, no, that's not it
Well it would be completely understandable if you did, I mean he clearly still has feelings for you
Yeah well, none of that matters now
For what it's worth I'm sorry I ever suggested he had a secure attachment style
The weirdest thing happened, Dad called, he was convinced he saw Simo in Tasmania
Well we both know that's impossible, Simo's with Ben and those other fools in Kerrangan
Yeah, Kerrang
Completely embarrassing, but a tiny part of me actually thought Sim might have gone to Tassie to ask Dad permission to propose
I've been watching too many rom-coms
Huh, do you want to come watch Love Actually with me?
I'd rather drive my car off a cliff, but yeah, you enjoy yourself
You're in Kerrang
Okay, this is going to sound completely crazy, but I can't stop thinking about it and you know Gerry most intimately
Sorry?
Do you think she would be offended if
I actually want to ask her if she'd consider having a baby as a single
You know I mean I liked Sam, but it was Gerry I had the connection with in the first place and I don't know I think it actually might be easier if we both went into it solo
Um, Harry as far as agendas go
I know it sounded awful out loud, but I don't know what do you think?
Well I just don't think that Gerry's in a place where she could consider anything right now
Oh yeah, no I know she's grieving, but I mean I couldn't wait
Well just from the very brief phone call I had with her I mean I could sense it in her voice I mean she sounded a bitanklerless
When did you speak to her and why am I only hearing about this now?
Well I just wanted to call her to touch base and see how she was doing
Okay
Okay so what did she say? Was it Sam that broke it off?
She wasn't specific I wasn't going to probe
You've literally never declined an opportunity to probe
Is there something you're not telling me?
Okay Harry, Gerry's whole world has just fallen apart I didn't think it was appropriate to ask for a blow by blow
Okay
That's the organic materials and garden waste bin
This is cardboard
Carburet goes in the recycle bin
I thought that's where the plastic goes
It does, only if it's hard plastic, the soft plastic goes in the cardboard box under the laundry sink
Isn't it all recycling?
Why is everything always so fucking complicated?
I don't know, I just don't know
I don't know what you're talking about
I don't know what you're talking about
I don't know what you're talking about
You tell me
Hey
G'day
Oye
Yeah we just waited until Ains left for work
Nice one
So, a couple of years ago I managed to save a bit of coin and buy a block of land in Diamond Creek
It's where I'm hoping to build a dream home for Ains and I one day
Oh it's so romantic sitting here
Mate, good work mate
Oh thanks, but at the moment it's just an empty block with a ripper view
But I thought it might be the perfect setting for the proposal
Huh
So the plan is to get Ains here
So, Henn, I'm hoping you might be able to help with that bit
If you can bring her to the front gate and from there it's a four step process representing four key memories of our relationship
It's kind of like a treasure quest situation
It looks more like a stations of the cross situation
No, this is all sounding lovely, go on
So, Benny, Lizzie and Hazza, I was hoping on the day you could meet me at 1600 hours on the block just to go through some finishing touches
I can run you through the idiosyncrasies of each station
Sounds great
Not a problem
What's the dress code?
Nice
Yeah
And, Heath, I know you don't like driving on the toll roads
No I don't
That's why I'm going to organise an Uber to pick you up from the house and bring you out to Diamond Creek when we're good to go
What are we telling Ains?
I know, we'll say that it's a heavy intervention, that she's depressed
Or more depressed
Brilliant
Well that's lovely Lizzie
And that we need to take her out and put her in front of a lot of hot single men
But isn't it too soon for that?
I don't think you're in a position to be giving me time limits
Harry and I can talk to Ainsley when she gets home from work tonight
Do you need me to act morose just to sell it?
No
I think we're ok on that front
Ok, we done?
Yeah, nothing further from me except, thank you
You alright?
Yeah, yeah
Come on
Smart mate, you're on it
Night two of living solo and things suddenly started to feel quiet
There was space again to pause and remember another version of life
It's me and Liz, can we have a word?
One sec
Is everything ok?
Have you seen Heather lately?
You've noticed it too?
We think it might be time for an intervention
What did you have in mind?
A sexy safari featuring margaritas and men
We want to take her to a bar tomorrow
The thing is, she's blatantly refused to slow down since it all happened
I'm just not sure that adding to her distractions
I think she's still in love with Ben
Well let's take her out of the house and talk about that
Yeah, well you know, we could lift up her spirits
I might distract her with our chances
I really feel like the best thing we can do for her right now is just give her more space
Let's give her space and then let's fill the space with our voices
All we need you to do is get her there
So we'll scope out the venue, make sure it doesn't offend her in any way
And then we'll send over an Uber to collect you both
Ok fine, but please just make sure it's somewhere quiet
You have our word
Sorry, I didn't know you were in here
Just leave it to it
Actually, Heather, I just wanted to say
If you did want to get out there on the tear, of course
Go for it whenever you feel ready
Because I know blokes can be falling over themselves
It's not real, we're pretending
So it's not something that you want?
If I did, I wouldn't need your permission
Thanks so much for coming over
I still can't bring myself to leave a house
You don't have to explain
I'm just really glad to see you
I'm sorry if the negotiations contributed in any way to the breakup
No, I was just in denial for a long time
It was actually a relief things fell apart when they did
Before there was a small human caught up in the middle
Of course
Harry, I know it doesn't feel like it now
But other opportunities will come along for you
Thank you, but is it weird if I admit that's not actually the thing I've been most anxious about?
I really want you in my life
And I guess I'm just hoping that it wasn't just the baby that was connecting us
It wasn't just the baby, Harry
I mean he, she or they would have been empirically gorgeous
Gorgeous without question
And smart
Undeniably smart
Okay, I'm just going to put this out there
If you did want to revisit things down the track, I would be up for it
And that's it, thank you for listening and moving on
Harry, you should know that it was never about the breakup
I have feelings for Liz
Romantic feelings
Wait, what?
Liz
Our Liz
For how long?
Going on 15 years now
She's entirely convinced that you hate her
Liz knows
I admitted it to her and I absolutely begged her not to say anything
I wanted you to hear this from me
Ains, the Uber's almost here
You said three minutes
Yeah, well it's just good manners to be waiting before it pulls up
Have you never told the others I said this?
But if you're doing this out of obligation and you just want to stay home on the couch, comfortable
There's no risk of interacting with the general public
I would stand in full support
I've already taken out my hair
Heather, heading to Diamond Creek?
Yeah, it's us
Wait, what?
Liz said there's some new pop-up bar or I think it was a vineyard or something
Sumo owns a block in Diamond Creek
Sumo owns land
Where are the others?
Oh, Sumo said to just wait here and it'll come and get us
Is there something about grass parrots mating?
No context
How'd you go with Gerry?
I don't want to talk about it
You okay?
Gerry told me
Told you what?
Do not make me say it
I'm so sorry, I just
I wanted to tell you but I promised Gerry and it just
happened
What are you talking about?
It was just a kiss
Oh my god
You kissed her
It was nothing, it was like two, three seconds max
You've blown up an eight year relationship
But in terms of her not wanting to have a child with you
You don't even like women
You've never liked women and if you did I would have known about it
Lizzie, Heather
Let's just agree to pick this up at home
Okay
Oh, look at you two
Is it alright?
You look stunning
Let's have ETA T minus 39 minutes
Okay, thanks Lizzie
Righto, we don't have much time so first things first
Orientation
In these envelopes is a map to your stations
Some instructions
And a few words I've jotted down for you to say if you don't mind
I've cleared these repper paths for you to walk down
So if you follow the map you should be sweet
Any questions?
No, just good luck Simu
I mean, you alright?
Yeah, yeah, sorry, I just
Been so focused on the logistics, I haven't stopped to feel the emotions
It's alright, game on
Don't shit the bed
You're on the home stretch
Yeah, there you go
Perfect
Harry, I just need to
Get to your station and get dressed
Okay
Heath, what am I walking into?
Come on
Okay
Okay
What is this?
Simu is the best one to tell you that, Ains, and good news for both of you
He's giving me the lines
Dear Ains, the first memory I have of you is three years ago
When Benny showed me this picture of you
On Insta
I was so blown away I tried to swipe right
It took me a while to realise that I was just liking and unlocking your face
A few hours later I was at your house for me, remember that?
Just about to have my first shot with Benny
In the fridge
When you walked into the room and just like that
My whole world changed
That feeling you get when everything you want out of life
Becomes completely clear
Alright
Straight down the hatch
This is why we like it
Oh yeah
You okay?
Yeah, I just didn't expect anything like this to happen for a long time
But it's a good thing, yeah?
Yeah
Our first Diwali together
Oh Harry
And the first time we danced cheek to cheek
But the best part of that night was the day
When it was just you and me and a house to decorate
You called the shots
You had me running up ladders
Rearranging tea lights
Plugging things in
You showed me that when we're together
Working as a team
Whatever it is
We'll end up with something beautiful
Every time
We can take a break, there's no rush
He's wonderful, Hev
Just, I'm so lucky
Come on
Last year
This is the tent I lived in for three months in your backyard
And I've never felt more comfortable
And that's because of you
Ains, warmth just follows wherever you go
It's in your laugh, your smile
It's in the way your voicemail says, hello this is Ainsley
And even when you went through the worst thing I've ever seen anyone go through
You were still thinking of others
You even thought of me
And I don't know anyone in the world with a heart that massive
And there's just one more
Okay
It is an option to say
imo, I love you, you're beautiful, let's keep talking
You don't have to do anything you're not ready to do
How?
You know how
Hev, no one has ever made me feel more loved or cared for or secure
So you're in a healthy relationship
That doesn't mean that you have to get married
I don't want to hurt him
I know
But how do you feel right now?
I love him
But
My world got smashed apart with everything that happened
And I'm still piecing myself back together
Should we do something?
I guess we just give her space
Is it happening?
It's not
What?
Is Ains alright?
She's in the tent
Is it voluntary or?
You know um
Where are you going?
You stay with Ains, I'm gonna get to see him
You're alright
This has just been really overwhelming
In a good way or?
In a beautiful way
Yeah
Yeah
Ains
These are the crates you sat on when you turned up at site that day last year
When you said you wanted to give it a go
Honestly that was the single best day of my life up until that point
But since then things have just gotten better
Waking up with you every morning
It's just made me love you more
And I want to do that forever
I want us to build a home here
I want to have family here
So
Ainsley, Olivia, Margaret, Elling
Will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?
Yes, yeah
Of course
Yeah
He's done it, the big fella
Magnificent mate
Congratulations
Oh jeez, you saw that coming eh?
Down the missus
Tell you what, I'm taking a proper breath about now and then
Yes, champagne, yes
Get married
So you took the ferry
Yeah
And was Dad okay?
I think he was pretty confused at first
But in the end he was very polite when he asked me to leave
I couldn't wait to get back to Ains
Two nights away felt like an eternity
You um, you happy?
Oh I nearly forgot
I promised Mum I'd give you this when I got back from the block
Do you mind if we give her a quick call? She's dying to speak to you
I'd love to say hi
You think that's impressive? You should see a decoupage
Hello Kevin
Hi Ma, I've got Ainsley here
Hi Pam
Oh precious Ainsley
Be Indian igoni quim
I always wanted a daughter
Thank you Pam and thank you for your gift
And it is my silent wish that you consider this new bridal world a palace of your imagination
And I, look I am the walls of that palace
So from one working lady to another I've taken the liberty of starting one of those Google Docs
I've listed my top five florists
Now how do we feel about bells of Ireland with a sprinkling of idol vice?
I like a bit of baby's breath myself but they said that went out in the 80s
Who knew?
I did ask them about shamrocks but they looked at me as I was mad
Next time on 5 Bedrooms
Pam, hello
Oh there she is, our angel
We've just got a few family traditions that's all
Perhaps you two could start learning the brush dance
The what?
Oh it's just a bit of fun for the bucks and hems
I don't know that we even want any of that
You're doing an excellent job feigning enjoyment
It's getting harder
I felt something when we kissed
Do you want to meet up for a
Yeah
All we need you to do is have a cheeky wine and just pose for some photos
Okay fine, chuck the lady over 50 out there on the apps and see what sticks
Sorry, I thought you were going back to the UK
If Harry's going to be starting a family here, I mean I'm not going to miss that
Sorry, I might just
I'm not the problem, am I?
You just hate me
I don't hate you Liz
What is it?
I've always had feelings for you
Did she tell you about the problems with Sam?
Did we push them too hard?
Because the truth is, I'll sign pretty much anything
I think they just need a bit of space
She give you any idea when she'll be able to look at me again?
Just dropping off dishes, stay where you are
Shit
It's good to see you
Don't do that
What if I move in?
I mean what if a full seven days exposure, week in, week out, is too much?
We have unanimous agreement and we'll proceed with Simo's suggestion
Any questions?
No
Since I can remember, I dreamed of being in a loving, committed relationship
Being able to call someone my person, feeling like they were home
and knowing it was reciprocated
Missed ya
It was everything I'd expected
Good day?
And a couple of things I didn't
Behind us, behind us, they're on us
Until he moved in, I'd never noticed Simo's obsession with online gaming
There's two of them underneath me, yeah, yeah, come on, come on
I've used my tactical
Boost!
That was close mate, that was close
Or that he liked to have a chat
Chuka, Sim, boy, it's all over for Birki and Lisa again, mate
He's, yeah, he's worried she's gonna get rid of the caravan
The same chat
The caravan's already off of like Gumtree, mate, feature that
Yeah, no, no, no, it's just the caravan, not the annex
Over and over again
It's all over for Birki and Lisa again, yeah, I know
Bloody Birki's messed things up with Lisa again
Renai's on hold
And she's selling the caravan
Yeah
It's not that I don't appreciate him being there for his friends
It just doesn't seem like the most effective way of communicating
Yeah, but it's the intimacy that he's striving for, eh?
Can you just chuck him under the tap for us?
It's a one-on-one
You know, once I tried to show him how to reply all to a group email
He teared up
Said it was too impersonal
Just one other thing
Have you ever worried that Sim might have gastrointestinal issues?
Reliability was always a trait in Simo I admired
I just hadn't realised it extended to every corner of his life
It was a consistent 4.50am every morning for a solid hour
He does always light a candle
And he's very dependable with his midpoint courtesy flush
Do you think it could be irritable bowel?
Or maybe he's allergic to fructose?
Hey, you just moved in together
There are always going to be a couple of wrinkles to iron out
How are you going with this system of pillows?
It had been 37 nights since Simo moved in
And 37 nights since I had a pillow to sleep on
Because Simo took them all
I'm sure your shoulder won't get sore, I can use a pillow
I could sleep like this forever
But I'd waited over half my life for this
I wasn't going to let a general lack of neck support get between me and happily ever after
Hey Ace
Yeah
Perky
I think he's a bit banged up
Might have to head out to Crang for a bit
Get on the tools, give me a hand with the extension
But if an opportunity for spinal comfort did happen to present
I'll miss you but I totally understand
I think you should go
You sure?
Of course
Oh
Have you heard?
Good morning
Gerry's back in Melbourne
No, I didn't know
Turns out she's got a pretty good excuse for the radio silence
She and Sam have broken up
Still trying to work out which way is up so starting a family is off the table for the foreseeable future
I realise this comes as a bit of a shock
You know, I mean not that it matters but who do you think broke up with who?
God that's awful
For everyone
Are you feeling okay?
I actually feel so relieved
I wasn't the reason Gerry was pulling away
I didn't know you were feeling or still feeling that
No, of course, of course it was
Well it doesn't matter
We've got our explanation and she wants to catch up this weekend
This weekend?
I might need to check my diary and come back to you
Oh no sorry, I actually meant she wants to catch up with me
Do you mind?
Oh no, God, go for it
Great, thanks
Just holistically speaking do you think that's the best approach?
Going in alone?
So you do mind?
No, I'm just saying that knowing Gerry historically
That there's a good chance that she's going to be at her worst
And you might want to be prepared for that
Okay, well I'll keep that in mind
Thank you
That's the fifth batch of online purchases you've ordered
This week
You want to tell me what's up?
There was a sale
Well when you're done trying to fill the void
You know where to find me
Hello
Hi, it's me
Liz
Liz
I'm aware it's you, Liz
Look, I know it's been a while
I just thought you might need some space
Hello?
You've spoken to Harry
I have
Are you okay?
Well I'm in my late 30s and living with my mother so
Gerry I'm so sorry
About the breakup
It wasn't anything to do with me was it?
No, it wasn't
Do you want to meet up?
With me?
Liz, I reached out to Harry because
He deserves an explanation
Um, just as a matter of interest
How much of an explanation are we talking?
Well I haven't said anything about us
Have you?
No, no not a word
I think it might be best for everyone if we just forget anything ever happened
Yeah, yeah, no it's probably the best thing for
You and for Harry and me
And your husband?
Stuart
Of course, my husband
Day one of solo living
And I wondered if being alone would suddenly feel empty
But then I took off my pants
Lined up a few rom-coms
Cracked into the ice cream
Straight out of the tub
And it felt so good
Probably too good
Hi Dad, is everything okay?
That slow moving apprentice bloke
Not Benny, the other one
Buf or Biff
Timo?
Ah, the tip of my tongue
What about him?
He's here
He's loitering between the front fence and the big gun tree
That's impossible
You haven't told him I did well with my super have you, or the Bitcoin?
Dad, Simo's in Kerang
Dad, still there?
Travelling, he's travelling
Confirmed he is on approach
I'll call you back Moose
There was no reason why Simo would go to Tasmania
And voluntarily visit my father
Except maybe one
Mr Elling
Des
Mr Elling
I've come here to ask respectfully for your blessing to propose to your daughter
Ainsley
And?
I love Ainsley
So much
And I want to spend the rest of my life with her
If she'll have me
What does Ainsley think about all this?
I'm not sure, I haven't asked her yet
I think you should be asking her, not me
You're currently married?
No sir
You have any children in utero or otherwise?
No, no sir, no sir
You're hesitating
Sorry sir, that's just my nerves sir
You're financially independent?
Yes sir, I run my own business and I firmly believe in the power of compound interest
Who do you bear it for?
Well?
I prefer not to say sir
Why's that?
I'm afraid you might not like the answer sir
All that's ever mattered to me is that Ainsley's happy
And if that involves you, then
Really?
You know, I was on the phone to Ainsley before you came bouncing in here like a tennis ball
I could have sworn you were going to ask for money
Well you didn't tell her I was here did you?
I'll walk her back
Yeah turned out it was an old mate after all
Okay, who was it?
Yeah good chat, I'm off
You need to use the facilities?
It's very considerate of you sir, but I didn't want to risk it, I went a few times before I came
The door locks automatically from the outside and I'll see you at the wedding
See you there, hopefully
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
Hello?
Hez, it's Sim, I've got news
Look I know things have been seriously shit for you and Benny and I definitely don't want to add to any of that
But I was kind of hoping
Yeah he's on the other line isn't he?
Yeah it'll be a very quick merge phone call, no cameras, three minutes tops
Do I have a choice?
Yes, yes of course, this is merely a respectful request for your permission
Two minutes
Thank you, one sec
We all here?
Still here
Yeah g'day Hez
Goc's ticking Simmer
Hez, Benny, you know I love the both of ya, which is why I wanted you to be the first to know
Ainsley's dad's given me the nod to propose
Ha ha ha mate, that's awesome news, that's the best thing I've heard in ages
Congratulations fella
If you could just keep it on the down low until further notice, well you can tell the others but not Ains obviously
She still thinks I'm in Kerrang
What's in Kerrang?
Oh with Berkey, genius
Sim, Sim you there?
Yeah I was just taking a breath mate, to be honest I was a bit worried that this proposal might have been a bit triggering for you both
I appreciate the concern Simmer, but as long as I don't have to learn a choreographed dance I'm here to help
Yeah we both are mate, we both are
It's so good to hear that because if you're both up for it my instinct for the proposal is to go big
Shit Ains is calling, what should I do?
Leave it
Hang up, hang up
Leave it
Hello
Hello Kevin Fitzsimer speaking
Sim it's me
Oh Ains, hi, how are ya?
I'm missing you
How's Kerrang? Is the Renault coming along?
Hello?
Yeah it's a bit of bad news actually Ains, it's asbestos actually, Berkey's place is riddled with it
Asbestos, isn't that dangerous?
It is, extremely, and it's everywhere here, it's in the roof, the tiles, the insulation, it's all through the bloody plumbing
But don't worry Ains, we're taking extra good care with this removal
You're doing the removal, don't you need some kind of licence for that?
Ah yeah look Ains, I did raise that with Berkey but um, the thing is he's looking at this bloody asbestos removal as kind of metaphoric or something
He reckons if you can't resolve the toxicity in his home he's not going to be able to resolve it in his relationship
But the good news is Ains, I'll be home soon and I can't bloody wait to see him
Ains, you all good?
Actually I'm feeling Dad called earlier, he said he saw you
Oh, is your dad in Kerang is he? Yes
Ben?
Ains, hey how are ya? Sorry to butt in, I'm up here with Sim and Berkey and the asbestos
You're parked out the front here
Yeah I know, I caught a lift up with old buckets there, but anyway we're just tackling the final few bits of shooting now so I should probably
Please tell me you've done some kind of removal training, or buckets
Okay, well everyone just be safe
Yep, no worries Ains, we'll do it as best as we can
Mate
Fuck
Sorry mate, I just fucked it and then I committed to it and I think it's going to be alright, I reckon I can clear out of the house without her seeing me
What was that?
It's fine, I actually think big pitch out
Hey, are you home?
Close it, close it, quiet
Hey
Oh shit, turn it off
What's going on?
Please don't tell Ben
What?
I knew he was away, helping a mate with the Renault and I was snooping, I'm not proud of it
Oh, he's, do you want me to go back in there with you?
No, thank you
What are you worried about?
I don't know, just been thinking about it a bit more lately
Do you think maybe you're feeling a bit of deferred onset anger towards Ben, because I know I am
Yeah, yeah, just you know, a bit of apang
Do you think you still have feelings for him?
No, no, no, that's not it
Well it would be completely understandable if you did, I mean he clearly still has feelings for you
Yeah well, none of that matters now
For what it's worth I'm sorry I ever suggested he had a secure attachment style
The weirdest thing happened, Dad called, he was convinced he saw Simo in Tasmania
Well we both know that's impossible, Simo's with Ben and those other fools in Kerrangan
Yeah, Kerrang
Completely embarrassing, but a tiny part of me actually thought Sim might have gone to Tassie to ask Dad permission to propose
I've been watching too many rom-coms
Huh, do you want to come watch Love Actually with me?
I'd rather drive my car off a cliff, but yeah, you enjoy yourself
You're in Kerrang
Okay, this is going to sound completely crazy, but I can't stop thinking about it and you know Gerry most intimately
Sorry?
Do you think she would be offended if
I actually want to ask her if she'd consider having a baby as a single
You know I mean I liked Sam, but it was Gerry I had the connection with in the first place and I don't know I think it actually might be easier if we both went into it solo
Um, Harry as far as agendas go
I know it sounded awful out loud, but I don't know what do you think?
Well I just don't think that Gerry's in a place where she could consider anything right now
Oh yeah, no I know she's grieving, but I mean I couldn't wait
Well just from the very brief phone call I had with her I mean I could sense it in her voice I mean she sounded a bitanklerless
When did you speak to her and why am I only hearing about this now?
Well I just wanted to call her to touch base and see how she was doing
Okay
Okay so what did she say? Was it Sam that broke it off?
She wasn't specific I wasn't going to probe
You've literally never declined an opportunity to probe
Is there something you're not telling me?
Okay Harry, Gerry's whole world has just fallen apart I didn't think it was appropriate to ask for a blow by blow
Okay
That's the organic materials and garden waste bin
This is cardboard
Carburet goes in the recycle bin
I thought that's where the plastic goes
It does, only if it's hard plastic, the soft plastic goes in the cardboard box under the laundry sink
Isn't it all recycling?
Why is everything always so fucking complicated?
I don't know, I just don't know
I don't know what you're talking about
I don't know what you're talking about
I don't know what you're talking about
You tell me
Hey
G'day
Oye
Yeah we just waited until Ains left for work
Nice one
So, a couple of years ago I managed to save a bit of coin and buy a block of land in Diamond Creek
It's where I'm hoping to build a dream home for Ains and I one day
Oh it's so romantic sitting here
Mate, good work mate
Oh thanks, but at the moment it's just an empty block with a ripper view
But I thought it might be the perfect setting for the proposal
Huh
So the plan is to get Ains here
So, Henn, I'm hoping you might be able to help with that bit
If you can bring her to the front gate and from there it's a four step process representing four key memories of our relationship
It's kind of like a treasure quest situation
It looks more like a stations of the cross situation
No, this is all sounding lovely, go on
So, Benny, Lizzie and Hazza, I was hoping on the day you could meet me at 1600 hours on the block just to go through some finishing touches
I can run you through the idiosyncrasies of each station
Sounds great
Not a problem
What's the dress code?
Nice
Yeah
And, Heath, I know you don't like driving on the toll roads
No I don't
That's why I'm going to organise an Uber to pick you up from the house and bring you out to Diamond Creek when we're good to go
What are we telling Ains?
I know, we'll say that it's a heavy intervention, that she's depressed
Or more depressed
Brilliant
Well that's lovely Lizzie
And that we need to take her out and put her in front of a lot of hot single men
But isn't it too soon for that?
I don't think you're in a position to be giving me time limits
Harry and I can talk to Ainsley when she gets home from work tonight
Do you need me to act morose just to sell it?
No
I think we're ok on that front
Ok, we done?
Yeah, nothing further from me except, thank you
You alright?
Yeah, yeah
Come on
Smart mate, you're on it
Night two of living solo and things suddenly started to feel quiet
There was space again to pause and remember another version of life
It's me and Liz, can we have a word?
One sec
Is everything ok?
Have you seen Heather lately?
You've noticed it too?
We think it might be time for an intervention
What did you have in mind?
A sexy safari featuring margaritas and men
We want to take her to a bar tomorrow
The thing is, she's blatantly refused to slow down since it all happened
I'm just not sure that adding to her distractions
I think she's still in love with Ben
Well let's take her out of the house and talk about that
Yeah, well you know, we could lift up her spirits
I might distract her with our chances
I really feel like the best thing we can do for her right now is just give her more space
Let's give her space and then let's fill the space with our voices
All we need you to do is get her there
So we'll scope out the venue, make sure it doesn't offend her in any way
And then we'll send over an Uber to collect you both
Ok fine, but please just make sure it's somewhere quiet
You have our word
Sorry, I didn't know you were in here
Just leave it to it
Actually, Heather, I just wanted to say
If you did want to get out there on the tear, of course
Go for it whenever you feel ready
Because I know blokes can be falling over themselves
It's not real, we're pretending
So it's not something that you want?
If I did, I wouldn't need your permission
Thanks so much for coming over
I still can't bring myself to leave a house
You don't have to explain
I'm just really glad to see you
I'm sorry if the negotiations contributed in any way to the breakup
No, I was just in denial for a long time
It was actually a relief things fell apart when they did
Before there was a small human caught up in the middle
Of course
Harry, I know it doesn't feel like it now
But other opportunities will come along for you
Thank you, but is it weird if I admit that's not actually the thing I've been most anxious about?
I really want you in my life
And I guess I'm just hoping that it wasn't just the baby that was connecting us
It wasn't just the baby, Harry
I mean he, she or they would have been empirically gorgeous
Gorgeous without question
And smart
Undeniably smart
Okay, I'm just going to put this out there
If you did want to revisit things down the track, I would be up for it
And that's it, thank you for listening and moving on
Harry, you should know that it was never about the breakup
I have feelings for Liz
Romantic feelings
Wait, what?
Liz
Our Liz
For how long?
Going on 15 years now
She's entirely convinced that you hate her
Liz knows
I admitted it to her and I absolutely begged her not to say anything
I wanted you to hear this from me
Ains, the Uber's almost here
You said three minutes
Yeah, well it's just good manners to be waiting before it pulls up
Have you never told the others I said this?
But if you're doing this out of obligation and you just want to stay home on the couch, comfortable
There's no risk of interacting with the general public
I would stand in full support
I've already taken out my hair
Heather, heading to Diamond Creek?
Yeah, it's us
Wait, what?
Liz said there's some new pop-up bar or I think it was a vineyard or something
Sumo owns a block in Diamond Creek
Sumo owns land
Where are the others?
Oh, Sumo said to just wait here and it'll come and get us
Is there something about grass parrots mating?
No context
How'd you go with Gerry?
I don't want to talk about it
You okay?
Gerry told me
Told you what?
Do not make me say it
I'm so sorry, I just
I wanted to tell you but I promised Gerry and it just
happened
What are you talking about?
It was just a kiss
Oh my god
You kissed her
It was nothing, it was like two, three seconds max
You've blown up an eight year relationship
But in terms of her not wanting to have a child with you
You don't even like women
You've never liked women and if you did I would have known about it
Lizzie, Heather
Let's just agree to pick this up at home
Okay
Oh, look at you two
Is it alright?
You look stunning
Let's have ETA T minus 39 minutes
Okay, thanks Lizzie
Righto, we don't have much time so first things first
Orientation
In these envelopes is a map to your stations
Some instructions
And a few words I've jotted down for you to say if you don't mind
I've cleared these repper paths for you to walk down
So if you follow the map you should be sweet
Any questions?
No, just good luck Simu
I mean, you alright?
Yeah, yeah, sorry, I just
Been so focused on the logistics, I haven't stopped to feel the emotions
It's alright, game on
Don't shit the bed
You're on the home stretch
Yeah, there you go
Perfect
Harry, I just need to
Get to your station and get dressed
Okay
Heath, what am I walking into?
Come on
Okay
Okay
What is this?
Simu is the best one to tell you that, Ains, and good news for both of you
He's giving me the lines
Dear Ains, the first memory I have of you is three years ago
When Benny showed me this picture of you
On Insta
I was so blown away I tried to swipe right
It took me a while to realise that I was just liking and unlocking your face
A few hours later I was at your house for me, remember that?
Just about to have my first shot with Benny
In the fridge
When you walked into the room and just like that
My whole world changed
That feeling you get when everything you want out of life
Becomes completely clear
Alright
Straight down the hatch
This is why we like it
Oh yeah
You okay?
Yeah, I just didn't expect anything like this to happen for a long time
But it's a good thing, yeah?
Yeah
Our first Diwali together
Oh Harry
And the first time we danced cheek to cheek
But the best part of that night was the day
When it was just you and me and a house to decorate
You called the shots
You had me running up ladders
Rearranging tea lights
Plugging things in
You showed me that when we're together
Working as a team
Whatever it is
We'll end up with something beautiful
Every time
We can take a break, there's no rush
He's wonderful, Hev
Just, I'm so lucky
Come on
Last year
This is the tent I lived in for three months in your backyard
And I've never felt more comfortable
And that's because of you
Ains, warmth just follows wherever you go
It's in your laugh, your smile
It's in the way your voicemail says, hello this is Ainsley
And even when you went through the worst thing I've ever seen anyone go through
You were still thinking of others
You even thought of me
And I don't know anyone in the world with a heart that massive
And there's just one more
Okay
It is an option to say
imo, I love you, you're beautiful, let's keep talking
You don't have to do anything you're not ready to do
How?
You know how
Hev, no one has ever made me feel more loved or cared for or secure
So you're in a healthy relationship
That doesn't mean that you have to get married
I don't want to hurt him
I know
But how do you feel right now?
I love him
But
My world got smashed apart with everything that happened
And I'm still piecing myself back together
Should we do something?
I guess we just give her space
Is it happening?
It's not
What?
Is Ains alright?
She's in the tent
Is it voluntary or?
You know um
Where are you going?
You stay with Ains, I'm gonna get to see him
You're alright
This has just been really overwhelming
In a good way or?
In a beautiful way
Yeah
Yeah
Ains
These are the crates you sat on when you turned up at site that day last year
When you said you wanted to give it a go
Honestly that was the single best day of my life up until that point
But since then things have just gotten better
Waking up with you every morning
It's just made me love you more
And I want to do that forever
I want us to build a home here
I want to have family here
So
Ainsley, Olivia, Margaret, Elling
Will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?
Yes, yeah
Of course
Yeah
He's done it, the big fella
Magnificent mate
Congratulations
Oh jeez, you saw that coming eh?
Down the missus
Tell you what, I'm taking a proper breath about now and then
Yes, champagne, yes
Get married
So you took the ferry
Yeah
And was Dad okay?
I think he was pretty confused at first
But in the end he was very polite when he asked me to leave
I couldn't wait to get back to Ains
Two nights away felt like an eternity
You um, you happy?
Oh I nearly forgot
I promised Mum I'd give you this when I got back from the block
Do you mind if we give her a quick call? She's dying to speak to you
I'd love to say hi
You think that's impressive? You should see a decoupage
Hello Kevin
Hi Ma, I've got Ainsley here
Hi Pam
Oh precious Ainsley
Be Indian igoni quim
I always wanted a daughter
Thank you Pam and thank you for your gift
And it is my silent wish that you consider this new bridal world a palace of your imagination
And I, look I am the walls of that palace
So from one working lady to another I've taken the liberty of starting one of those Google Docs
I've listed my top five florists
Now how do we feel about bells of Ireland with a sprinkling of idol vice?
I like a bit of baby's breath myself but they said that went out in the 80s
Who knew?
I did ask them about shamrocks but they looked at me as I was mad
Next time on 5 Bedrooms
Pam, hello
Oh there she is, our angel
We've just got a few family traditions that's all
Perhaps you two could start learning the brush dance
The what?
Oh it's just a bit of fun for the bucks and hems
I don't know that we even want any of that
You're doing an excellent job feigning enjoyment
It's getting harder
I felt something when we kissed
Do you want to meet up for a
Yeah
All we need you to do is have a cheeky wine and just pose for some photos
Okay fine, chuck the lady over 50 out there on the apps and see what sticks