Just Good Friends (1983) s03e05 Episode Script

1 What would you say If I told you things had never changed and We II find a way To take our dreams and rearrange them Who d believe That we could be in love again? So let s just pretend That you and me can be Just good friends Your breakfast.
Bon appetite and I hope it chokes ya.
Something wrong, love? Something wrong? You know what's wrong.
Why did you have to ask her round my house? How many times have I got to go over this? Six months ago, Gina, our daughter-in-law, started divorce proceedings against Vincent, our son, who I signed my British business interests over to.
She is trying to claim 50% of his entire estate.
And I told you six months ago that I'd go and sort her out.
I'll give her 50%, the cadging cow! Well, when she gets round here, you sort her out.
Cos I could lose a large lump of my scrap metal business.
I don't see why I should lose anything.
I didn't go to Paris and have an affair with that Penny Warrender bird.
Sleeping Beauty did, up there.
It weren't my Vinnie s fault.
Why do you think he did it, eh? Cos his wife weren't looking after him properly.
And you know what I mean.
I'm eating.
Somebody ought to tell that Gina, the bedroom ain't just for hanging your wigs in.
If the male of the species is being deprived, he'll go on the roam.
Look at that old mongrel we used to have.
He'd go miles for a bitch, wouldn't he? Yeah.
He never flew to Paris, though.
Oh, hello, Gina.
Didn't see you standing there.
The back door was open.
Hello, Rita.
How are you? How am I? I'll tell you how I am, shall I, darling? I'm livid, that's what I am.
Bloody livid.
That's right, Reet.
Be diplomatic.
I'm sorry.
Is it'something I've? Oh, don't tell me.
It's those ridiculous letters my solicitor sent Vince, isn t it? Please ignore them.
It's just solicitors talk.
You mean, you're not trying to bleed my Vinnie dry? Of course not.
I'm only hoping for a fair settlement.
I wouldn't do anything in the world to hurt you two.
Oh, please, don't you turn against me the way Vincent has.
Nah, nah, nah.
We wouldn't do that, love.
Don't you worry.
We'll always be here, darling.
Ah, I knew it was a misunderstanding, Les, didn't I? Yeah.
And there was me threatening to stab you.
Do you want an egg sandwich, presh? Er, no thank you, Rita.
I've eaten.
So, how s the vineyard, Les? Oh, smashing, love.
We go into full production next month.
Oh, I brought some samples over for Vincent to give to retailers.
We had it checked by a couple of experts and they reckoned, put in the right price bracket, should go like a bomb.
I see.
It sounds very good.
Mm, purely out of interest, do you have a detailed analysis of marketing potential, distribution and sales margins? Er, somewhere.
Vincent did all that.
Yeah, didn't need a computer, either.
He's a wizard at that sort of thing.
I don't understand it at all.
Do you, babe? No, no.
It's all Dutch to me.
My, my.
- Gina.
- Vince.
I just called round to say hello.
What, and you had to sit down for it? Why does he treat me like this? I mean, hasn't he hurt me enough already? (Sobs) - (Gina wails) - Take no notice of him, darling.
He's always like that first thing in the morning.
(Wailing) You callous little sod.
Do you hear that noise she's making? They can hear it next door and we're detached.
That is the sound of a broken heart.
That is the sound of a woman betrayed.
Shut up! That is the sound of a cunning little mare, trying to extract as much information about our business as she can.
Now, that's enough, boy.
Gina's not the type to I'll just move em for you, love.
The tears might make the ink run.
Les, would you like to come up and help me make the bed? Yeah, right away, love.
So The vineyard s almost at full production.
Those papers made very interesting reading.
I can't wait to tell my solicitor.
The vineyard and the wine belong to my father and you can't take him for a penny.
You've set up a company to import and sell his rotten wine and I intend to take you for everything I can, and a penny.
And talking of Pennies, I intend to name her.
Now, wait a minute, Gina.
Don't bring her name up in court.
She was innocent.
I didn't tell her I was married so she didn't know.
I'll still name her.
And do you know why? Because I don't like her.
I haven't seen her for six months.
What are you going to tell the judge? Your husband s having an affair with someone he never sees? (Phone rings) (French accent) Bonjour, Vincent.
I have returned.
Oh, good.
We've all missed you.
Would you like to speak to my husband? Please.
Darling? It's one of your friends.
He won't be long.
He's only just got out of bed.
Sleepy head.
- Hello? - Vince, it's me.
I'm at the airport.
I said I'd give you a call when I arrived back.
Yeah, right.
Look Are you free for lunch? Do you know that Italian wine bar in Abbots Road? 12'o clock suit you? Fine.
So she's still around, I see.
- Yeah.
- Look, Vince.
If things have changed over the past few months, please tell me.
No, they haven't.
Honest.
- Do you still love me? - Yeah.
Good.
You do know who this is, don't you? Of course.
I just thought I'd ask.
All right, then.
12'o clock.
Great.
(Vince hangs up) Great.
'Bye, Pen.
' Bye, Vince.
Thank you, Georgio.
Now, where was I? Oh, yes.
Our biggest problem is the marketing.
It's a new wine so retailers and customers are bound to be a bit wary of it at first.
Mmm.
So somehow or another, we've got to give it a kind of mature, traditional feel.
We need to get away from the fact it's fermented in aluminium vats, assisted with chemicals and crushed by a diesel turbine engine, and suggest, just suggest, it is still trod by the feet of peasants.
Why don't you put a corn plaster in each bottle? I don't know what it is, but I get the impression your heart s not in this.
Sorry.
I've got a lot on my mind.
Go on.
All I need now is someone who knows the wine trade like the back of his hand.
It's all new to me so I need someone to guide me.
It's hard to find the right man.
Oh, that's true, Vincent, very true.
What's the matter with you? I'm sorry.
I've been home and Mummy was depressed.
- Have you told her about us? - Of course I haven't.
It would kill her.
You should tell her, Pen.
What's to tell? I occasionally have lunch with a married man? Hardly Harold Robbins stuff, is it? No, she's depressed about Daddy.
He's still out of work and it makes me so sad.
When I think back to how hard he worked for that company and then when he d served his purpose, they just threw him away.
He worked for a wine importer.
It's a pity you can't talk to him.
He d tell you who to look out for.
Of course.
He was in the wine trade.
Hmm, and a lot of good it did him.
Oh, look, shall we go? Why don't we book a room in a sleazy hotel for the afternoon? If I'm supposed to be the other woman, I might as well act like her.
Absolutely.
I'll I'll just get the bill.
Hello, darling.
Mummy! What's the matter? I'm not smudged, am I? No, I'm just surprised to see you, that's all.
I've just been to take Daddy to the office.
You know.
Yes.
Well, bye, Mummy.
I was just going to do some shopping, or are you in a hurry? Yes, I'm in a terrible hurry.
- Bye for now.
- Bye, darling.
Did you want anything special for supper? No.
Right, are you fit? Mummy? Mummy, say something.
- It's been a long time, Daphne.
- Oh, shut up.
Go and get some water.
Water.
Right.
Good idea.
- What's wrong with her, Bert? - I think she's drunk.
- She is not drunk.
- Well, she looks drunk.
She might look drunk but she's not drunk.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Oh, you meant (Daphne cries) Yeah, and that was it.
He went, just like that.
It was in the main bar.
Here, I heard Daphne had a bad turn in the high street this afternoon.
Yeah, she felt a bit faint, that's all.
The doctor says a few days bed rest should do the trick.
That's what happened to my Muriel, God rest her soul.
Yeah, there s only two things you can guarantee in this life, Norman.
Death and taxes.
Tell Daphne we're all praying for her.
Thank you, Arthur.
I will.
Half price, Norm.
It's the happy hour.
Cheers.
Thanks.
Norman, you old rascal.
I knew I'd find you here.
Good Lord! What are you doing in here? How did you get in? It's members only.
I told them I was an ex-serviceman.
Falklands and all that.
Norman, I came to see you because I had to explain about that unfortunate incident this afternoon.
Oh.
Now, I happened to be in a wine bar when, out of the blue, Penny walked in.
Anyway, we chatted and we were just about to go our separate ways when Daphne appeared.
Well, naturally, I was overjoyed.
I said, 'How are you, Daphne? ' And bang, she went down like a sack of spuds.
Yes, she mentioned it.
A few times.
Did you really throw water in her face? Please, Norman, I don't want any thanks.
I'd do it again if I had to.
How is Daphne? Sedated.
Will you be completely honest with me, Vincent? I'm not given to telling lies, Norman.
Good.
Are you and my daughter seeing each other again? The truth? - The truth.
- No, we're not.
That's good enough for me, Vincent.
Thank you.
- Thank you, Norman.
- Group Captain? Yes? You left your drink in the other bar.
- Chocks away, sir.
- Yeah, up periscope.
Let me put my cards on the table.
There was another reason for me coming to see you tonight.
A few years ago my father bought a vineyard in Portugal.
- Oh.
- Him and Reet used to love Falcon s Crest.
Anyway, next month they go into production.
I'm handling the import end of it.
Well, I say 'handling '.
The truth is, I don't know the first thing about the wine business.
Whereas you were head of sales and distribution, have lots of contacts in the retail trade and know all the pitfalls.
So how can I help you, Vince? Norman, I'm looking for someone who was head of sales and distribution, has lots of contacts in the retail trade and knows all the pitfalls.
Now, would you know of anyone who fits that bill? Are you serious, Vincent? I've never been more serious in my life.
Well, yes.
Yes, I do.
I have the perfect man for you.
Really? Who? His name s David Palmer.
Used to work under me.
36, but he's good, Vince.
I taught him.
This is hard work.
No, Norman.
I'm looking for someone older, someone about your age.
We need to present a mature image to our customers.
Nobody employs people of my age these days.
I do, Norman.
Head of sales, consultant and a seat next to me on the board to advise me when I'm about to make a cock-up.
Now, what do you say, Norman? Well, it's a wonderful opportunity.
Just trying to think of someone for you.
Listen, Norman, they close in three hours.
You've toyed with me long enough.
If you don't want the job, just say so.
Me? You want me for the job? You're a cool customer, Norman.
You lured me right into your trap.
You're seriously offering me a job? I have to be honest with you.
I've been out of work for 18 months.
Well, the sooner we get started, the better.
That contains all the information you need to know about the company.
We're not playing at this, Norm.
We're for real.
You have a think and let me know your decision.
I'll take the job.
You're a decision-maker, Norman.
I like that in a man.
There's less to you than meets the eye.
Yes.
We'll have a meeting next week.
I'll be in touch.
Vincent, I won't let you down.
I know that, Norm.
That's why I came to you.
Give my love to Daphne and your daughter - Penny.
- Absolutely.
I'm back.
I'm damn well back! (Door opening) Mummy? Mummy? Oh.
Hello, darling.
What time is it? 7:30.
Time for your tablets.
I've been asleep for hours.
I had the strangest dream.
I dreamt an old man with a long flowing beard of purest white appeared before me.
I wondered who d been smoking in here.
- Do you think it was God? - Or Captain Birds Eye.
I really don't know, Mummy.
Now, come on.
Take your pills.
Did it really happen, darling, or was it just a nightmare? How many times do I have to tell you? I went into the wine bar to make a phone call.
Vince just happened to be there.
I see.
Why did he kiss you? Well, because It was a sign of affection.
No, friendship.
- You know he's married now.
- Yes, he told me.
- Did you congratulate him? - What? - Did you congratulate him? - Yes.
I said, 'Congratulations.
I hope you'll both be very happy.
' - That's nice, darling.
- He's getting divorced.
He's what? He's only been married 18 months.
Why are they divorcing? I assume because they're blissfully happy.
Why do you think they're getting divorced? I'll bet every brass farthing I could lay my hands on he's been unfaithful.
Oh, yes.
There s some little trollop somewhere.
You steer well clear of him, Penny.
He's nothing but trouble.
And the same goes for that entire family.
The less contact we have with them, the better.
Sometimes it makes my skin crawl just to think we're living in the same city.
Hello, darling.
How are you, Daphne? Very weak, Norman.
Well, not to worry, eh? Because I have the most wonderful news.
I thought I'd rush home and cheer you both up.
Come on, then.
What is it? No, we've got to make sure we've got a drink first.
We're celebrating.
- There you are, dear.
- Thank you, Daddy.
There you are, Daphne.
And now for my news.
I have been offered a job.
Daddy, that's wonderful.
That's all I need, your father coming home drunk.
No, I'm not drunk, Daphne.
Not yet.
I met this chap down at the ex-servicemen s club.
He's offered me a job in the wine trade.
Not only will I be head of sales and distribution, I will also have a seat on the board and be advisor to the chairman.
And you're taking it seriously? Oh, for God s sake, Norman.
Most of them down at that club have got shrapnel floating through their brains.
No, dear.
He's not a member.
He wasn't even in the services.
He asked for me especially.
Because of my experience, my maturity, and my contacts to help his company.
Aren't you going to stay for the celebration? Oh, yes.
I just have to use the phone in the breakfast nook.
That call I didn't make this afternoon.
Well, it certainly looks genuine enough, Norman.
WWC Ltd? Walthamstow Wine Company.
Curious name.
Doesn't have quite the same ring as Grants of St James's, but still.
And you say your name will be added to the list of directors? In time, dear.
V Pinner, L Pinner, R Pinner and C Pinner.
- It's the Pinners.
- No, dear.
What do you mean, 'No, dear '? V Pinner, L Pinner, R Pinner and C Pinner.
You don't have to be head of Interpol to work out that it's the Pinners.
It's the Pinners and me, darling.
You see, in recent years they've invested all their money into wine production.
It's their wine we're celebrating with.
Eurgh! And you let me drink it! Look, take it from me, as someone who knows something about this business.
They have an excellent set-up and a first-class professional approach.
Now, whatever you think of Vincent, he's a damned good businessman.
- But it's the Pinners.
- But it's a job, Daphne.
- But, Norman.
- Yes, pet? It's the Pinners! Don't you understand what this means? They'll be our bosses.
We'll be working for them.
We'll have to talk to them.
We'll have to go to their parties.
We'll have to drink Australian sherry.
Think about it, Norman.
We'll have to jive! Listen to me, Daphne, I am the captain of my own destiny and you are sailing on my vessel.
And if I decide to set course for uncharted waters, then you either sail with me or you jump ship.
Norman, don't be so bloody daft.
Sorry, dear.
Carried away.
Look, darling, I am going to accept this job and prosper with my new company.
And I expect you, as my partner, to support me with strength, and love.
Oh, and let's get one thing absolutely clear, Daphne.
If we have to jive, then jive we will.
But it's the Pinners! Everything all right? I'm not sure, Vince.
I was hoping you d tell me.
You've given my father a job.
Oh, I see.
Well Listen I don't want any thanks.
And you're not getting any.
Why, Vince? Why, of all the people who could have filled that vacancy, did you choose my father? Well, why not? Because you're up to something.
You're manoeuvring.
I know the signs and it's worrying me.
I think you're trying to buy us.
You want to own my family.
Oh, no, really, Pen.
I don't want to own your family.
Once my father starts working for your company, we belong to you.
My mother can no longer slander your name or abuse your memory in the normal way and I will have to dance to your tune, follow your plans, because I'd know that if I didn't, my father would lose his job.
Do you honestly think I'd do that? You've always been the same.
You could never like something or someone without trying to buy the freehold.
Well, let's get one thing straight, zonko.
You will never own my family.
No, let's get two things straight, zonko.
I don't want to own your family.
I wouldn't want your family if they were on special offer at Tesco.
I wouldn't want them if they were given away free with a packet of Daz.
What I'm trying to say, Penelope, is, I do not want to own your family.
- Fine.
- Good.
Right.
This won't affect my father's job, will it? No.
You asked me why I offered Norm the job.
All right, I'll tell you.
He's worked in the wine trade for years.
He has experience of running his own department and he has a lot of important contacts.
And he's the most honest man I've ever met.
He would never cheat me, Pen.
I need him more than he needs me.
Do you understand what I'm saying? Yes, and I apologise.
I accept.
- She spent the night with you, didn't she? - Who? You know full well who.
Her, that woman.
What, you mean Gina? Yes, bloody Gina.
I phoned you this morning from the airport and she was there.
I mean, not that it bothers me.
If you two are trying for a reconciliation, well, that's fine by me.
I wish you the very best of luck.
You creep! I didn't sleep with her.
I came down this morning and she was there.
Oh, I bet you've been having a rare old time while I've been in France.
Well, two can play at that game, Vincent.
While I've been in Paris, I've been living it up as well.
Oh, boy, have I been having a good time.
Yeah? Yes.
Men, Vincent.
Lots of men.
I have.
I have, really.
Do you have to keep doing that? Now, you listen to me.
For the last few months, I have lived in a state of total celibacy.
- You liar.
- It's true, Pen.
I haven't done anything.
Monks have been knocking on my door, asking me how I do it.
Do you honestly think I'd cheat on you and sleep with my wife? There's been no one.
I swear to you on my life.
Swear it on the life of the one you love most.
Oh, you just did.
- You believe me, don't you, Pen? - I don't know.
I don't know about anything any more.
I just can't get it out of my mind that I turned my back for a couple of years and you went and got married.
Well, she told me she was pregnant.
- I'll phone you.
- When? I don't know, but I'll call you.
Sometime.
(Sighs) A loaf of bread, a glass of wine, and thou.
And I'll be fat, drunk and neurotic.
Georgio? Give me 20 cigarettes, please.
When you start smoking? In about 30 seconds.
Women! Wish I'd been born a poof! (Phone rings) - Yes? - Vince? It's me, Penny.
I said I'd give you a call.
You took your time, though.
Yes, look I'm sorry.
I don't mean to be like that.
It's just I get so confused, especially when her name s mentioned.
That's all right, Pen.
I understand.
Once I get next month s court hearing over and done with, everything will be a lot clearer.
Yes.
Yes, of course it will.
Er Vince? What I said about me in Paris, all those men It wasn't true.
Oh, good.
Are you laughing? - No.
- Well, you'd better not be.
No, Pen, honestly.
I'm not laughing.
All right.
Look I'll call you tomo (Bang) Hold on a minute, Vince.
There's been a crash.
Pen, don't be alarmed but I've just had a crash.
I am not injured.
I repeat, I am not You moron! Didn't you see my car? If I'd seen it, I wouldn't have smashed into it.
I was distracted.
Someone was talking to me on the phone.
Oh, no.
She's hung up! I'm a witness.
I saw it all.
Moron! Just look at my lovely car.
It's ruined.
Ah, come on, Pen.
It's nothing.
It will be all right.
I'll have it all repaired for you.
It will never look the same.
Don't forget, I'm a witness.
It will, Pen, I promise.
I will kiss it better.
Don't forget, I'm a witness.
- Will you marry me? - Yes, all right.
Would you be a witness?